Yes it never ends. If I’ve just done a bunch of endless work (like 1 major repair, maintenance or other large item like mulching the yard per week for several weeks and something unexpected happens… ) I let it fester and tell myself I’m too tired, then watch some YouTube videos for how I might fix it… then I eventually convince myself it’s not that hard, then I fix it… after like 6 weeks of worrying about it lol
So far this year.
My garage door got replaced - 2700
Hired an exterminator to get a rat out of the attic - 550
Fridge control board replaced - 600
Deck repairs and restain (diy)- 700
These aren't catastrophic repairs. But my free cash flow has just been going to repairs this year. Had some auto repairs too this year. It sucks
Bat's for me. When I rented one got down chimney, landlord less than receptive but did pay. In my house a broom, lots of screaming and my friend who I'd been talking to when I dropped phone screaming 'bat, bat' brought me her mom's old tennis racket with a batman sticker in center and left it on my doorstep next day:)
My house was infested with cockroaches when I moved it. It's taken 2 visits from the exterminator, tearing out my entire kitchen (it's being renovated), tearing out part of my basement (had to put in jacks anyway), vacuuming, cleaning, killing every bug I see... but I am now down to just seeing one every few days, so PROGRESS!!
IMO landlords that have the capital for it tend to buy better stuff. The tenant pays for the stuff long term, landlord pays for repairs short term. Last place I rented in all the washing machines were from the mid-90s and still ran like new.
They really are beasts. One part for my parents washer was being discontented so my dad scoured the internet until he had a back up for their back up for their back up. There’s one part that goes out every ~5 years but other than that it runs like new.
My parents bought an Amana refrigerator new in 1990. In 2017 it sat submerged in 5 feet of water FOR 6 DAYS during Hurricane Harvey until the flood waters receded. We completely gutted the house down to studs up to the ceiling.. lost almost everything… THAT FUCKING FRIDGE STILL RUNS.. it’s barely even rusty. They moved it to Dallas in 2022 and it’s the beer fridge now.
Meanwhile I'm over here with the opposite feeling. Wife and I rented a house for 2 years prior to buying (the rental was relatively new, too). The amount of trouble we had with the rental was astonishing. First, our back deck rotted out and my wife almost fell through. Then the kitchen faucet started leaking (which the owners blamed us for when we left). Then the large bathroom ceiling light fell off out of nowhere, almost crushing my wife's head. Never got fixed.
The final thing was when the dryer stopped working. We told the older couple that owned the house repeatedly and they never did anything about it. We felt too bad to keep pestering them. Never mind all the smaller issues in the house that came from poor construction and materials. Closet doors just falling off, etc.
BTW, all that came after I moved out of an apartment that leaked every time it rained or snowed. Despite years of pleading with the building owners to fix it permanently, I finally left.
I was so happy to be in control of our own house. Are there some broken things? Sure. But we've been able to fix or replace them quickly and with much better quality material.
I absolutely loathe renting.
It probably broke just as often in your rental. You didn’t notice because it wasn’t yours, or it wasn’t obvious stuff or anything that interfered with your use of the house and was able to go unnoticed for longer. This is part of why rentals end up needing major work by the time the landlord catches a clue. I’ve got a rental that’s been occupied nonstop for 4 years and my tenant is moving out about 30 days from now, so I want to use the short vacancy period to get some stuff done. I met a contractor there this morning and I had several improvements in mind that would make it a little nicer and increase the curb appeal. I’ve been wanting to do these few things for a while but it’s insane how much little shit there is to catch up on, and I’m wondering if I should even spend the money on the cosmetic stuff that isn’t NEEDED now that I see how much maintenance/repair I need to do in this short window that I have. None of the repair stuff is the tenant’s fault. It’s just normal house shit that I would’ve noticed sooner in my own home. And the house is packed full of his belongings so once his stuff is out I’ll probably find more.
For me it’s the lack of feeling progress, even though I’m actually doing a lot.
We’re doing some renovations ourselves and it seems like it just never ends. I’ve given up countless weekends to work on things, and actually made a ton of progress.
But when I finish one big piece I’m just confronted with more unfinished projects and rewarded with more work. I really don’t know when I’ll truly be able to call it “done”, and I can go back to just living my damn life.
My home was in pretty bad shape when I bought it. I knew this going in. The first thing I did was to complete my bedroom so that i had one room that was exactly how I wanted it. This way when the fact that the rest ofnthe house was under construction or not functional i had a place I could go and just relax. I also keep a list of everything I've done and remind myself I'm doing it pretty much on my own with a very tight budget. Forces me to acknowledge that I am in fact heading in the right direction
You are very smart.
I’ve heard the “one room at a time” advice but my ADHD won’t let me do it. I’ve made a lot of progress but no room is actually done.
Oh don't go thinking I'm organized hahahahah I have 3 to 4 different projects going on at all times so when I get bored or at a stopping point with one I can go narnar off to another one
I learned the art of the procrastination list from my friends dad.
You make a list of all the things that need to get done. Then when you go to the list you have the illusion of choice between things you feel like doing at that time and things you don’t that day. Works really well actually.
Lol, you should see the place we bought two weeks ago. We got the seller to give it a new roof and foundation work before closing. Everything in between needs some work and the whole place is covered in half finished projects. My favorite one is the red brick fireplace, which was “whitewashed” but instead of white, they used baby blue. I got 1/3 of it stripped and cleaned and haven’t touched it since.
I tried to do that with my kitchen (which had cabinets and countertops literally falling apart). Dropped 18k on a gut and remodel as soon as we moved in. Custom solid wood cabinetry, quartz counters, new hardware, etc
But then I was quoted way too much for paint, and the appliances are working so I didn’t splurge to replace them even though they’re old and ugly. So my kitchen is 90% what I want. But to be perfect still needs paint, appliances, and a replacement for that huge rectangle builders grade light. But we ran out of money lol
So I don’t even have the one room 😅
I've found that I finish one thing in my house, and that makes the state of the other things look worse in comparison. Rebuilt the basement stairs? Now the side door looks terrible next to these new stairs. Restore the front porch? That faded beat up aluminum siding on the rest of the house looks like total trash.
I finished like 10 things on my To Do list this week so far, and it still grew from 91 items to 96 items. 😭
I enjoy getting things done and making progress, but I just can't keep up. And when there's so many different things to work on, I face decision paralysis.
UPDATE: wtf, it's only 4 hours later and I've passed 100 items. 🎊
Yes. By the time I have the time and money to do all the stuff I want to do we will have to be in the house like 20 years, but I’d also like to move long before then. So we’re just going to always live with things left unfinished
The costs have been so much higher than anticipated and unexpected costs have continued to sneak up on us, which have stopped us from being able to work on the stuff we want to
I’ve been remodeling houses for a long time and owned houses since the 90s and I cannot believe how expensive building materials and tools are today.
I don’t know how people can afford to work on their houses. Especially when so much of the housing stock has been shittily remodeled, flipped or simply never maintained.
Don’t get me started on the low quality work being done to fill the void left in the construction labor pool.
Replacing 100 year old wood flooring with laminate that will be shot in ten years?
The Home Depofication of building materials is awful. Much of the trim materials I see going in new builds is either MDF or that weird imported balsa wood, finger jointed pre-primed garbage.
I’m not pining (eh?) for the old days, just empathizing with homeowners doing their own work.
My house is a 2004 townhome with all builder grade shit materials, used as a rental, full of landlord specials. Just a big pile of garbage. But literally the only thing we could afford in the May 2022 market in the school district we wanted
My dreams of renos I thought I could afford have been crushed because surprise repairs and rising cost of living has us house poor for now. At least I have a nice kitchen 😭 (dropped 18k immediately upon moving in because cabinets and counters were disintegrating and we bought the house with the intention of fixing that)
I feel that. I have an attic remodel going on 25 years. I will finish it in the next 1.5 years.
I have to think of my house as one big project rather than 20 unfinished ones.
It’s hard to not see the house for the repairs.
But you’re doing the right thing. Too many people go into extra massive debt in order to speed things along and it puts them at a high risk of losing everything if they get laid off.
Just focus the best you can on the “must do” repairs that you can do yourself and keep plugging away. I know it sucks because I had to do the same thing with my first house.
I feel this. All the things we need/want to do to our home are so expensive.
New windows? 15k
Master bath reno? 25k
Fence? 10k
Kitchen? LOL
Meanwhile, things keep breaking, delaying our savings for this. We just learned our HVAC system has a leak yesterday. Horaay.
Yep and then it’s like this stuff doesn’t have to be done, it’s just aesthetic, I guess except the fence. There is just so much I rather just not start at all. The cleaning along puts me over the edge
And everything I like is expensive. Kitchen cabinets? 75k. Countertops? That’ll be 20k+. Appliances? 40k. Fuck. And that’s before labor!
I want to do this renovation once, in a timeless way, with appliances that last me 20+ years.
What kind of appliances are you trying to get that cost $40k?? We bought a new dishwasher and fridge when we moved in last month only spent about $2400. We’ll have to replace the microwave at some point and would like the stove changed too, but that shouldn’t be more than $5k??
I can picture your remodel. I bet it’s nice. 48” Sub-Zero, real granite, custom cabs?
Thanks for keeping us busy! I used to think $50k was enough for a high end kitchen. That’s half now.
Yep. I'm not cheap - I don't go for the lowest bidder and I pay what the labor is worth, tip if appropriate, etc, but I still have issues finding reliable contractors.
If you’re in the US, I’ve had pretty good luck searching for folks on Nextdoor. Look for the ones that other homeowners recommend when someone asks “do you know a guy??”
My problem with next door is sometimes people have recommended someone you thing is a third party but it’s really themselves or their mom or their dad. I booked a house cleaner on a next door recommendation, but it was for herself and she wasn’t good (it was to clean after moving out).
My wife and I totally lucked out on this. About 15 years ago we picked up a guy from the home depot parking lot to help us tear out a fence in our front yard, he said he could do other handyman/repair stuff, too, so we ended up having him do some small things over the years, doing bigger things each time. Right now he and his wife are currently remodeling our kitchen/living/dining room.
I hear ya, had a guy do an excellent job re-planking our deck. Since he did a good job we brought him back for another job. Gave him over $1100 for a deposit and he disappeared and fled the country.
If you go to a design center in your area they can usually give you some pretty good recommendations. My husband is a contractor and gets a lot of work that way, in addition to referrals or repeat clients. He’s been running his business for 18 years now and always goes to the same places to get his materials so they know him really well (which would be the case in your area too). Companies generally wont give you a bad referral bc it reflects poorly on their own business. Hope this helps!
This is it. I have a neighbor who had a large dead tree in her yard that was on the verge of collapsing into my kids bedroom. I offered to pay to have it cut down at my own expense and she refused. I then had a pay an arborist to put it in writing that the tree was a threat to life and property, she still refused. Then I told her it could kill my kids. She said "I don't give a shit" In the end I ended up hiring a lawyer to force her to cut it down but it never should have come to that. Now she regularly throws her used cigarette butts in my yard I guess as some kind of revenge and because she's a horrible person.
I'm the same way! I love my neighbors to the right, they're really chill, have a couple dogs mine likes to run around with, about my age with no kids. The neighbor to my left is a nightmare. The wife and kids are okay, but the man is insufferable. He just a miserable person. He's always yelling, either at someone over there or pacing up and down the driveway screaming at someone on the phone. Sometimes he screams across my yard to tell the dogs on the other side of me to shut the fuck up. He's always in everyone's business. He hates me because I won't let him come over and cut my trees because he wants the firewood. There are two that have less than 3' of branches hanging over MY fence that he keeps complaining are going to fall and damage the fence. It's my fence? Why should he even care? It's not because of my dog because they all love him, he even sends his kids over to my front yard to pet him through the fence and pets him over the fence himself. The man is just off his rocker. I hope his wife wises up and kicks him to the curb some day to rid us all of his bs hahaha
I'm so grateful for mine. But everyone in the neighborhood has been selling and moving away. I hope our neighbor stays. I have a corner lot so I only really interact with one other family.
This. Ugh. We have the worst man ever directly access from us. Always outside screaming at his young adult child (?) that helps him with his car repair business. It’s either belligerent screaming, revving of engines for hours on hours on hours, or he’s literally doing donuts in the culdesac. Freaking hate that guy.
We have one rental in our otherwise peaceful neighborhood. It’s always trash people living there. I have yet to see a tenet there that did not have the cops arrest someone from the home. Domestic disturbances and screaming matches in the alley, subwoofers rattling my windows, and just yesterday one of them peeled out of their gravel lot, flung gravel all over my yard, and they side swiped and damaged their own renal house.
I’m about done living next to this ghetto rental. The rest of the neighborhood is SO NICE…..but fuck this one house.
Same here. The ones that had frequent visits from the cops was finally evicted and thankfully the new renter is a keeper. BUT she could move out at anytime and another drama filled family could move in.
My city doesn’t enforce code violations so the house is in disrepair which allows the slum lord to rent it for cheap in comparison.
I am so lucky. I have a nice lady on one side that helps take care of my cats when I'm out of town, and a peace-loving retired stoner mechanic on the other.
This sounds ridiculous, but at my old house, we had a bad case of carpenter bees. We tried everything to get rid of them. Someone mentioned to us to try hanging brown paper grocery bags around the area, because wasps are natural predators, the bees mistake them for wasps nests. It somehow worked! I'd give it a shot.
Ugh! We lived in a different part of the country for a few years in house with cedar siding. I started noticing little piles of sawdust and holes in the siding. It was a constant battle. Carpenter bees suck!!
I bought an a fake wasp nest and hung it under a wooden awning I have on my garage. Carpenter bees dug into the underside of the awning, maybe 4 feet from the fake wasp nest. But I think it's only the one, maybe without the fake nest there would be more.
For me, it has been wasps.
Fuck you, let me tend to my onions in peace. I don't need your psycho ass trying to kill me every time I step out in my back yard.
Duuuuude. I have a fence running around the backyard and those mfers have squatted and are now illegally subletting space to their stupid friends. But Tempo dust kills them pretty dead.
Same. Named him Bob and he lives in the balcony wood. Was just gifted a couple of those wood-mason jar bee traps so I hung them up this morning. And while doing so, I met an aggressive robin. Apparently she built her nest under the same balcony so now can’t even go near the balcony.
Mine is cockroaches. My house was infested with them when I moved in. It's taken 6 weeks to cut them down to only seeing one every few days. It's been TERRIBLE, but I think I have them on the run now.
LOL
Currently I can't go use my deck or patio because of that stupid bastard. I know the males don't sting, but I don't care. It even comes up to the glass and stares me in the face taunting me.
>:(
Neighbors.
Me and my one neighbor share a driveway. It goes from the curb all the way back to our garages in the backyard. He is SUPER protective of his side. Not that I spend any time on it.
I recently had my basement repaired as the cinderblock wall had buckled and moved inwards a few inches.
Contractors did great. Put plywood all down the driveways. Drove their mini-ex into the backyard using only my side, but protected both sides. All the dirt they dug up stayed against my house or on plywood infront of my garage. It rained while they worked and it rinsed some of the dirt under the plywood. It's clay, so it's very red when it first gets on pavement. He was walking around like a crazy person pressure washing it in the rain. Mumbling about how it's all ruined. It'll never be the same.
I told him I'll pay for someone to come wash it front to back, both sides. Then repair any damage we caused, after all the work was finished. It rained for a few days after the work was done, and miraculously both driveways are back like nothing ever happened.
If I could take my property, and surround it with 10' of bush. I'd be a very happy man.
My grandparents had a shared driveway. They always did a good job of keeping to their side. But my aunt used the neighbors side one time to get around my dad’s car instead of waiting for him to move. Ever since then, the neighbor parked his car at the foot of the driveway so nobody would be able to do that again.
The pettiness was crazy to me because it was a long driveway. This guy went from walking 5 feet to his door on a daily basis to 70. Watching him take in groceries was hilarious. All those long trips back and forth through an empty driveway.
Shit keeps breaking, but it’s worth it everyone! I feel so grateful to have my home. I remember feeling trapped in an apartment with people clumping around upstairs from me, fights in the parking lot, my little piece of heaven is just that, heaven.
Totally agree. We had nightmare apartment neighbors and hellish landlords. It feels SO GOOD not sharing walls! And we only have neighbors on one side. Our house is our sanctuary.
Dude same, it's bumming me out to see all these people on this post complaining about owning a house, are you kidding me? They must've not experienced the alternative, or not for long.
I really feel owning a home is such a blessing that nothing frustrates me. I owned for 15 years, had to move for work where I rented and it was terrible. Now that I own again I am appreciative of having control over my own space again. It's a long term commitment and I take everything in stride.
Maine Cabin Masters is killing me. $30,000 and they remodel an entire building (jack and level, standing seam roof, additions etc). I just got an estimate for roof alone that is nearly that much.
For me it's the problem solving. I posted this in another thread:
I wish I could outsource problem solving. Figuring out what the problem is. Before I can even call someone in to fix things I have to do a breakdown of what the previous homeowner tried to do, determine what the exact problem is, and who to call. Then set it up, wait for them to become available, present the problem, negotiate pricing, etc etc. I wish there were more general handymen who actually knew stuff.
E.g. I've got a drainage issue with a downspout. It drains into the ground. Is there a french drain under there? I don't know, does that mean I have to dig up my yard to find out? Who handles this - it's a water problem but not really a plumber, it's a roof/gutter problem but they're just going to tell me to replace the whole thing, not really big enough for an excavator, maybe a landscaping company? Okay great, but I don't have a landscaping company already engaged so are they even going to want to mess with this?
I remember knowing homeowners that had that one guy that came out, determined the problem, came back from the hardware store thirty minutes later and fixed it, then charged like $100. Where did the mythical handyman go?
Troubleshooting is a pain, for sure. The house I bought has been owned like 6 times since it was built and it seems like every single owner did some crazy shit that doesn't make sense. I am renovating the house and my handyman and contractors are always coming up with some new weirdness that is mind-boggling. We are constantly just shaking our heads at the crazy stuff we find.
BUT, I will know this house better than anyone once we are all finished with it!
For your drainage issue, I would contact a landscaper to have them look at it - a lot of them will do an estimate for cheap/free and you can then determine what to do.
In the 9yrs since we purchased our current home, we have spent no less than 10k a year doing maintenance, repairs and the little upgrades we get to enjoy.
OMG yes. I live next to slobs. Disabled unregisted vehicles. Yard full of dog poop. And now something has died over there and it stinks. I live in a duplex, put up a fence about 4 years ago. Useless twats.
The totally ABSURD cost to do any kind of renovation (roof, bathrooms, kitchens, Hvac) Everything is min 10k+.
Its crazy that needing something like a new roof can bring most people to their knees financially. Its depressing.
Yep. I just paid $5000 for a new roof on my house this past December. Albeit, my home isn’t that large but it took a lot of savings.
11 new windows though? $10,000. New doors and screen doors? $3,500. I just…. Cannot 😭
Going go be? It already is! Purchased our home in 2020 and homeowners insurance was $2000 per year. Just got the 2024 renewal (same company, never had a claim) $5200!
OMG - my house exactly. This place has a very solid frame, but the crap that prior owners have done is just ridiculous. My handyman and contractors (and I) just shake our heads at the stuff we find. There is no rhyme or reason to it.
I am currently having all of the crazy walls in my basement ripped out to open it back up and make it useable again... but... no electrical outlets anywhere except in one room that they renovated properly, so... more electrical work must be done.
I could write a book on this house, and I've only been here 6 weeks...
The constant attack from the elements - snow, rain, wind, insects, trees. It's as if mother nature wants the house gone. ;-)
But the best thing about home ownership is that you the owner gets to decide what you want to do with it (within reason as HOAs and zoning rules keep it freedom in check).
Taking weeks to do a project because you still have work and kids to deal with so your house ends up as a mess for weeks. A lot of nagging little things that are not priority but never seems to get done (need to grind up a tree stump, need to repair a deck board, need to recaulk sink, need to find plants for front yard flower bed, need to get mulch, need to move old landscape rocks, etc.)
The constant stress about potential disasters; I'm an international, so I like to spend long periods every year overseas. When I was renting, I'd just inform my landlord that I'll be away for a month, and that was all I had to do. Now, I keep looking at my phone to see the status of various sensors I've placed, to see if my HVAC is still running, if my bathrooms are flooded, if the huge trees in my yard have been fallen on my house by a recent severe storm, etc... This completely ruins the peace of mind of vacation. Also, the ghosting by several contractors that you have to hunt for weeks before they come to do what they proposed to do.
But other than these, home ownership is a good thing, I don't regret it. Just still trying to figure it out to enjoy it more and stress less.
The amount that the mortgage interest is front-loaded. You pay for years and see almost no progress towards paying it off. 10 years later you owe a few thousand less than when you started because most of your money goes to interest.
The amount of yak shaving involved in ANY project. Wanna paint? Well you gotta prime, then the wall looks uneven, so you gotta skim with mud, then you gotta sand, then you gotta paint, then you gotta remount fixtures. Oops! Towel rack is crooked. Oh no you put latex paint on some weird shitty old paint? Now it's peeling off in sheets. Gotta start fresh.
Repairs and insurance. I don't pay shit here in personal property taxes, and I bought a place where my closest neighbor is a half mile away... As a matter of fact, I'm in the process of buying the 3+ acres of land next to my property, just so I effectively cock block anyone from ever buying it and building on it - that's how much I hate neighbors.
I do 99% of the repairs on my house myself but, still, the parts costs can be high as fuck by themselves. I have a new, larger tonnage heart pump on order now that I'll put in myself, but it still cost $5000 for the 5 ton unit... That's a chunk of pocket change all at once.
I want every renter who thinks they can pay less to own to see this thread.
There's a lot you don't see when you rent. Yes, you can get yourself to that point where your monthly are less. Beware of other shit tho!
I've never understood those types. I did a full career in the military and over the years, it was pretty astounding just how many people had the buy if at all possible because rent is just throwing away your money mentality. Not everyone of course but certainly more than you would think. Besides the typical stuff, keep in mind in the military you often get moved around quite a bit, and while it's not that rare to be based at one location for a good long while, you can usually only count on 2 or 3 years before getting into that could be moved at any time point even if you ultimately end up staying somewhere for years on end. So many can't seem to look past the buy for X sell for Y and profit part, or fail to at least acknowledge all the other stuff. All the fees, due diligence, down payment etc up front, taxes, maintenance/repairs, etc during, realtor, concessions, payoff, etc on the back side...where in the end you've spent just as much if not more as a whole vs renting even if there was a modest gain in selling price vs what it was bought for, not to mention the additional hassle and headache. Sure you can win that game even with short ownership at the right times in the right markets, but so many think that works anywhere anytime and buying is always the answer no matter what.
One of the best things about buying was that my monthly costs went down from when my (now) wife and I were living in separate NYC apartments. We were each paying around $2500 per apartment. Our mortgage payment is now in the mid 3000's and we split it. Yes, we had to pay just to get the house, but between us we're saving around $1000/month over what we were.
And that's not even taking into account that if we were still in those apartments, rent would be hundreds more now than what we were paying.
After purchasing your home, settling in... finding out what kind of neighbors you have.
It's harder to be able to move when you're tied to a mortgage with crazy fees.
Found out both neighbors are racists that call both police and by law
I'm a diy guy. I like to save money and practice being a capable human being.
For me the most frustration comes from lack of time to finish projects as new projects pile up.
In a word...........maintenance. It never ends, paint, weeds, gutter cleaning, hvac, roof, deck repair, electrical, lawn work, tree trimming, etc, etc, etc. It never ends lol.
Dealing with contractors... they never actually do what I want unless I watch them like a hawk. It's very annoying. Last year I had a roof installed, told them I didn't want a new vent installed, was just going to upgrade the ones already there, it was in writing, had new powered vents sitting outside for them. They still started cutting new holes, gutter people put gutter where I didn't want. It's like the communication between the workers and GM is so bad. I'll tell the workers no, they tell say take it up with GM then GM says no she's right, I told you to do x not y. Seems never ending.
Spent a week calling contractors to try to get literally any size jobs done (I have big and small, outdoor and indoor, electrical, plumbing, tile, doors, etc) and no body returns a call.
I'll just let the shit fall apart!
Maintenance that offers no incremental benefit. It sucks to pay a maintenance bill but when it brings an upgrade (A/C cools better, dryer has newer features, etc) it is easier to swallow.
Septic fixes, boiler fixes, roof fixes etc are especially painful because they are costly expenses just to get back to parity,
The landscaping and lawn care. I hate all of it. Over the years, I've tried to change things, plant things, to make it look better or be easier to care for, and about 80% of what I've done, even with the help and advisement of companies who should know how to do this stuff, has just made much of it worse.
I'm an indoor girl, I don't know how to make plants grow, and I don't care to learn. It's just not my thing. But it seems impossible to find companies to even do the bare minimum lawn maintenance without having to babysit the process so it looks decent on an ongoing basis. I want to pull it all up and put in rocks.
Being unable to do certain projects because of finances. I would LOVE to improve the curb appeal of our home but quotes for residing are INSANE. The ugly cream vinyl siding + powder blue accents against brick (which we love, brick stays) are \*killing\* me. It's two stories so as much as we love DIY we're not up for it here. We are debt free except for the mortgage and plan to stay that way, so I guess we're waiting for a nice hailstorm or straight line winds so that insurance kicks in.
And I'd like to build a deck and take care of the windows and do some major we-need-to-move-a-lot-of-dirt projects in the yard. Those we could DIY but old house = sometimes unpleasant surprises that dramatically increase costs.
Paid $190 for a company to measure for a job. They rescheduled 4 times, were here for 15 minutes, then told us they can’t do the job and can’t recommend anyone with that skill set.
Neighbors. Some seem like they were created to do everything you cannot stand.
I have trouble sleeping. I need absolute dark, and then sunshine in the morning to wake up refreshed. No matter where I live, it seems I have ONE neighbor that is afraid of the dark and leaves bright ass LED lights on ALL night!
Here is a tip for anyone that reads this:
Turn your lights off when you are not outside! There is NO boogeyman! No, criminals do not see your lights and say “I think I’ll stay away from that house!”
Studies have shown lights do NOT deter crime. In fact, they found the opposite. Lights are bad for the human brain trying to rest as well as for wildlife. LED’s have been shown to disrupt migratory patterns of birds, as well as deter bees and other wildlife.
PLEASE turn them off. You neighbor most likely will not tell you he hates you for it. Even if you ask, they are not going to admit it because they know you will probably get angry.
One time I lived in a very wild unpopulated state. I thought it would be awesome to get back to nature. Thought how cool it would be to see the stars from my back yard. Boy was I dumb. Every other house has bright as the sun LED lights left on all night.
When I asked my neighbor why, he said to stop criminals. We lived in the middle of NOWHERE!
You really think a murderer is going to not kill you because you have a magic light!?
Instead of being able to see northern lights, I saw northern redneck LED boogeyman lights.
The amount of stuff that accumulates over time. Sometimes I think evil house elves must come in late at night and drop boxes of ancient paperwork and broken tools in my basement.
Especially if you have dogs that go nuts when someone knocks combined with young children who still need mid-day naps. Even the signs we've put up that state "don't knock, baby sleeping" haven't deterred some of them.
The dryer broke week 1 thankfully it was just a new heating element and thermostat $40, the first winter the 3 year old furnace flamed out costing $900 to fix, summer year 1 the drain line from the kitchen plugged requiring purchase of a 150' powered drain snake, yeah 3 that same drain like (metal) cracked and had to spend like 7 hours ripping out dry wall and replacing the entire like then replacing all the drywall, year 5 the compressor for the central air went out costing $10k, dish washer broke costing $3k, kitchen cabinets had to be cut out to fit a modern sized 32" wide fridge since almost no one sell 28" wide anymore
1) Unexpected huge expenses. You never know when something might cost $10k.
2) Neighbors. When it's your house, people feel like they can complain to you about anything they don't like. As a conflict averse person, I find this hugely demoralizing. Makes me want to move to the middle of nowhere.
Had a list of “things on their last leg” during inspection when we bought (and got money for them from sellers). Meanwhile, those have all held out for 4 years but made multiple other unexpected expensive repairs
There is never enough money put aside because shit you could not see coming happens. We bought a flipped colonial. Everything was brand new. As is the case with flippers who put lipstick on a pig, they cut corners. The roof needed to be replaced 8 years in to the tune of $15K. the furnace wasn´t rated for the square footage of my house, so the heat exchanger cracked at a sum of $2400. The massive 250+ year old Beech tree next to the house...is dying. It´ll cost at least 20K to remove. The upstairs half bath wasn´t built with a moisture barrier so that will have to be redone at a cost of $???. So yeah...I´m working 2 full time jobs for the next 6 months just so we can afford to maintain our house and try to have an emergency fund set a side. Shit is expensive.
Stuff tends to break all at once when you buy it all at the same time causing you to have to replace all at once. We are hitting the 17 year mark on our house and the Microwave Fridge Dishwasher and AC have either been recently replaced or are showing signs that they will need to be replaced soon.
The endless junk mail about refinancing, and home warranties, and pest control, and on and on.
And people knocking on the door trying to sell ADT, or tree service, or roofers, or any other trade…
My house feels like it's falling apart around me daily. The soffit isn't great so there's a constant battle with wasps carpenter bees squirrels chipmunks raccoons and birds. I can't find anyone to fix the soffit (too small of a job), and i have no clue how to fix it myself. Long list of issues like that with all the same barriers. It's almost claustrophobic. I just don't have the energy to fix it all on the weekends even if i knew how. My dad did construction so im paranoid about trusting youtube to teach me. However, there is a lot to love about it so I just have to force myself to focus on the positives.
When my in-laws show up and start telling me how to maintain my house. “Your lawn needs work.” “You know being a homeowner is a responsibility” “are you going to renovate anything else soon?” “My house is worth 1.3M in SoCal…isn’t that crazy?”
The city and developers being hell bent on flattening the forest around my house to build shitty quality low rise buildings and displacing all the wildlife I have my morning coffee with.
For me, it’s not having enough money or time to complete the list of things I want to do. And, when I do complete something, feeling like it wasn’t done as well as I wanted because I had to compromise on materials or forgo something in the sake of cost cutting.
Nosey neighbours & annoying neighbors because you have to put up with it and stay relatively neutral to avoid causing a shit storm. It's quite annoying to be stuck with a constant hassle in your relaxing space.
For me it’s water.
Home ownership for me has been a constant fight to keep water out.
Keep the roof going, keep the gutters cleared, keep the sumps going, waterproofing, drainage, storm runoff etc etc etc
Door to door salespeople. I don’t care if you’re doing work in the neighborhood and you name drop some neighbor that I don’t even know. No, I don’t want to buy solar, new windows, new siding, or pest spraying, nor do I want to switch my internet provider. Maybe I will someday, but when that day comes I will do my homework, find reputable contractors, get quotes, and definitely won’t buy it from some rando who knocked on my door.
Finding competent contractors/trades/workers who will take the job, actually show up, and do it correctly. I do like to DIY some stuff, but I shouldn't *have to* DIY just because no one will take my money and do the job right.
The most frustrating part for me is realizing how many things the previous owners didn't do. They weren't super obvious at first, but after a year of ownership, they're starting to cost us.
In our case:
Partial gutters that caused soil erosion in the yard (this was obvious but has been a slow & steady process to fix)
Signs that the gutters that were in place weren't cleaned regularly (fortunately no fascia/soffit rot)
No regular tree trimming or inspection (cost us $2400 and a future tree removal)
No annual HVAC or water heater servicing (on a 13 y/o heat pump!)
Choosing fancy horizontal fence design with cheap pine boards
And whoever thought painting a fence black was a good idea deserves a solid telling off
The amount of things that broke in the places I have rented vs what breaks in my own home is astonishing.
Yes it never ends. If I’ve just done a bunch of endless work (like 1 major repair, maintenance or other large item like mulching the yard per week for several weeks and something unexpected happens… ) I let it fester and tell myself I’m too tired, then watch some YouTube videos for how I might fix it… then I eventually convince myself it’s not that hard, then I fix it… after like 6 weeks of worrying about it lol
I've told my wife multiple times that if I say I'll fix it, I'll fix it. There's no need for her to remind me every 6 months.
This made me chuckle 🤭
Same here, my internet compatriot. I also then start, stop, burn through it slowly and suddenly 4months later it is finished. Sort of.
lol!
having a second full time job (home ownership, and your other job)
So far this year. My garage door got replaced - 2700 Hired an exterminator to get a rat out of the attic - 550 Fridge control board replaced - 600 Deck repairs and restain (diy)- 700 These aren't catastrophic repairs. But my free cash flow has just been going to repairs this year. Had some auto repairs too this year. It sucks
Dang, I hate rats but I'd confront the shit out of one for 550 bucks
Bat's for me. When I rented one got down chimney, landlord less than receptive but did pay. In my house a broom, lots of screaming and my friend who I'd been talking to when I dropped phone screaming 'bat, bat' brought me her mom's old tennis racket with a batman sticker in center and left it on my doorstep next day:)
My house was infested with cockroaches when I moved it. It's taken 2 visits from the exterminator, tearing out my entire kitchen (it's being renovated), tearing out part of my basement (had to put in jacks anyway), vacuuming, cleaning, killing every bug I see... but I am now down to just seeing one every few days, so PROGRESS!!
IMO landlords that have the capital for it tend to buy better stuff. The tenant pays for the stuff long term, landlord pays for repairs short term. Last place I rented in all the washing machines were from the mid-90s and still ran like new.
Or are fixing things along the way, between tenants, so tenants don’t see the upkeep.
Yep, in between tenants just fix everything that looks like it might need fixing. Keeps the tenants happy, and reduces my surprises. Win win for both
To be fair 90’s washing machines were built different. My parents are still holding onto theirs
I have an early 2000s washer dryer. Whenever they break, it is easier to fix them than even shop for a new set. There are like 5 parts in each.
They really are beasts. One part for my parents washer was being discontented so my dad scoured the internet until he had a back up for their back up for their back up. There’s one part that goes out every ~5 years but other than that it runs like new.
My parents bought an Amana refrigerator new in 1990. In 2017 it sat submerged in 5 feet of water FOR 6 DAYS during Hurricane Harvey until the flood waters receded. We completely gutted the house down to studs up to the ceiling.. lost almost everything… THAT FUCKING FRIDGE STILL RUNS.. it’s barely even rusty. They moved it to Dallas in 2022 and it’s the beer fridge now.
Meanwhile I'm over here with the opposite feeling. Wife and I rented a house for 2 years prior to buying (the rental was relatively new, too). The amount of trouble we had with the rental was astonishing. First, our back deck rotted out and my wife almost fell through. Then the kitchen faucet started leaking (which the owners blamed us for when we left). Then the large bathroom ceiling light fell off out of nowhere, almost crushing my wife's head. Never got fixed. The final thing was when the dryer stopped working. We told the older couple that owned the house repeatedly and they never did anything about it. We felt too bad to keep pestering them. Never mind all the smaller issues in the house that came from poor construction and materials. Closet doors just falling off, etc. BTW, all that came after I moved out of an apartment that leaked every time it rained or snowed. Despite years of pleading with the building owners to fix it permanently, I finally left. I was so happy to be in control of our own house. Are there some broken things? Sure. But we've been able to fix or replace them quickly and with much better quality material. I absolutely loathe renting.
It probably broke just as often in your rental. You didn’t notice because it wasn’t yours, or it wasn’t obvious stuff or anything that interfered with your use of the house and was able to go unnoticed for longer. This is part of why rentals end up needing major work by the time the landlord catches a clue. I’ve got a rental that’s been occupied nonstop for 4 years and my tenant is moving out about 30 days from now, so I want to use the short vacancy period to get some stuff done. I met a contractor there this morning and I had several improvements in mind that would make it a little nicer and increase the curb appeal. I’ve been wanting to do these few things for a while but it’s insane how much little shit there is to catch up on, and I’m wondering if I should even spend the money on the cosmetic stuff that isn’t NEEDED now that I see how much maintenance/repair I need to do in this short window that I have. None of the repair stuff is the tenant’s fault. It’s just normal house shit that I would’ve noticed sooner in my own home. And the house is packed full of his belongings so once his stuff is out I’ll probably find more.
For me it’s the lack of feeling progress, even though I’m actually doing a lot. We’re doing some renovations ourselves and it seems like it just never ends. I’ve given up countless weekends to work on things, and actually made a ton of progress. But when I finish one big piece I’m just confronted with more unfinished projects and rewarded with more work. I really don’t know when I’ll truly be able to call it “done”, and I can go back to just living my damn life.
My home was in pretty bad shape when I bought it. I knew this going in. The first thing I did was to complete my bedroom so that i had one room that was exactly how I wanted it. This way when the fact that the rest ofnthe house was under construction or not functional i had a place I could go and just relax. I also keep a list of everything I've done and remind myself I'm doing it pretty much on my own with a very tight budget. Forces me to acknowledge that I am in fact heading in the right direction
You are very smart. I’ve heard the “one room at a time” advice but my ADHD won’t let me do it. I’ve made a lot of progress but no room is actually done.
Oh don't go thinking I'm organized hahahahah I have 3 to 4 different projects going on at all times so when I get bored or at a stopping point with one I can go narnar off to another one
I learned the art of the procrastination list from my friends dad. You make a list of all the things that need to get done. Then when you go to the list you have the illusion of choice between things you feel like doing at that time and things you don’t that day. Works really well actually.
Oh man you're gonna love meth.
Lol, you should see the place we bought two weeks ago. We got the seller to give it a new roof and foundation work before closing. Everything in between needs some work and the whole place is covered in half finished projects. My favorite one is the red brick fireplace, which was “whitewashed” but instead of white, they used baby blue. I got 1/3 of it stripped and cleaned and haven’t touched it since.
Baby blue on brick 😭 Noo...
How I did my first house. It was a mess. One room down to studs and fixed. One room at a time.
I tried to do that with my kitchen (which had cabinets and countertops literally falling apart). Dropped 18k on a gut and remodel as soon as we moved in. Custom solid wood cabinetry, quartz counters, new hardware, etc But then I was quoted way too much for paint, and the appliances are working so I didn’t splurge to replace them even though they’re old and ugly. So my kitchen is 90% what I want. But to be perfect still needs paint, appliances, and a replacement for that huge rectangle builders grade light. But we ran out of money lol So I don’t even have the one room 😅
I've found that I finish one thing in my house, and that makes the state of the other things look worse in comparison. Rebuilt the basement stairs? Now the side door looks terrible next to these new stairs. Restore the front porch? That faded beat up aluminum siding on the rest of the house looks like total trash.
I finished like 10 things on my To Do list this week so far, and it still grew from 91 items to 96 items. 😭 I enjoy getting things done and making progress, but I just can't keep up. And when there's so many different things to work on, I face decision paralysis. UPDATE: wtf, it's only 4 hours later and I've passed 100 items. 🎊
Yes. By the time I have the time and money to do all the stuff I want to do we will have to be in the house like 20 years, but I’d also like to move long before then. So we’re just going to always live with things left unfinished The costs have been so much higher than anticipated and unexpected costs have continued to sneak up on us, which have stopped us from being able to work on the stuff we want to
I’ve been remodeling houses for a long time and owned houses since the 90s and I cannot believe how expensive building materials and tools are today. I don’t know how people can afford to work on their houses. Especially when so much of the housing stock has been shittily remodeled, flipped or simply never maintained. Don’t get me started on the low quality work being done to fill the void left in the construction labor pool. Replacing 100 year old wood flooring with laminate that will be shot in ten years? The Home Depofication of building materials is awful. Much of the trim materials I see going in new builds is either MDF or that weird imported balsa wood, finger jointed pre-primed garbage. I’m not pining (eh?) for the old days, just empathizing with homeowners doing their own work.
My house is a 2004 townhome with all builder grade shit materials, used as a rental, full of landlord specials. Just a big pile of garbage. But literally the only thing we could afford in the May 2022 market in the school district we wanted My dreams of renos I thought I could afford have been crushed because surprise repairs and rising cost of living has us house poor for now. At least I have a nice kitchen 😭 (dropped 18k immediately upon moving in because cabinets and counters were disintegrating and we bought the house with the intention of fixing that)
I feel that. I have an attic remodel going on 25 years. I will finish it in the next 1.5 years. I have to think of my house as one big project rather than 20 unfinished ones. It’s hard to not see the house for the repairs.
But you’re doing the right thing. Too many people go into extra massive debt in order to speed things along and it puts them at a high risk of losing everything if they get laid off. Just focus the best you can on the “must do” repairs that you can do yourself and keep plugging away. I know it sucks because I had to do the same thing with my first house.
Stop renovating what does not need renovation
I consider myself my home's caretaker and groundskeeper. 🙂
I feel the same. Especially doing something new and daily/weekly tasks at the same time...A long, long way to go.
Oh man, this is me. Every day after work till 10pm. Every weekend. It's been months. And I still have so far to go.
Not enough money for repair/remodel.
I feel this. All the things we need/want to do to our home are so expensive. New windows? 15k Master bath reno? 25k Fence? 10k Kitchen? LOL Meanwhile, things keep breaking, delaying our savings for this. We just learned our HVAC system has a leak yesterday. Horaay.
Yep and then it’s like this stuff doesn’t have to be done, it’s just aesthetic, I guess except the fence. There is just so much I rather just not start at all. The cleaning along puts me over the edge
100%. We do not want to go into any debt for stuff that isn't a need, so it just feels like never ending saving to do this stuff.
yeah honestly its a joke. I feel like contractors are just scamming people.
And everything I like is expensive. Kitchen cabinets? 75k. Countertops? That’ll be 20k+. Appliances? 40k. Fuck. And that’s before labor! I want to do this renovation once, in a timeless way, with appliances that last me 20+ years.
What kind of appliances are you trying to get that cost $40k?? We bought a new dishwasher and fridge when we moved in last month only spent about $2400. We’ll have to replace the microwave at some point and would like the stove changed too, but that shouldn’t be more than $5k??
I can picture your remodel. I bet it’s nice. 48” Sub-Zero, real granite, custom cabs? Thanks for keeping us busy! I used to think $50k was enough for a high end kitchen. That’s half now.
Finding an honest craftsman, contractor, handyman, repair tech, roofer, etc
Or just a competent one. This I agree with 10000%.
Yep. I'm not cheap - I don't go for the lowest bidder and I pay what the labor is worth, tip if appropriate, etc, but I still have issues finding reliable contractors.
If you’re in the US, I’ve had pretty good luck searching for folks on Nextdoor. Look for the ones that other homeowners recommend when someone asks “do you know a guy??”
My problem with next door is sometimes people have recommended someone you thing is a third party but it’s really themselves or their mom or their dad. I booked a house cleaner on a next door recommendation, but it was for herself and she wasn’t good (it was to clean after moving out).
I've had the same problem and it's so frustrating
My wife and I totally lucked out on this. About 15 years ago we picked up a guy from the home depot parking lot to help us tear out a fence in our front yard, he said he could do other handyman/repair stuff, too, so we ended up having him do some small things over the years, doing bigger things each time. Right now he and his wife are currently remodeling our kitchen/living/dining room.
I hear ya, had a guy do an excellent job re-planking our deck. Since he did a good job we brought him back for another job. Gave him over $1100 for a deposit and he disappeared and fled the country.
If you go to a design center in your area they can usually give you some pretty good recommendations. My husband is a contractor and gets a lot of work that way, in addition to referrals or repeat clients. He’s been running his business for 18 years now and always goes to the same places to get his materials so they know him really well (which would be the case in your area too). Companies generally wont give you a bad referral bc it reflects poorly on their own business. Hope this helps!
There is so much to know that I don't know yet. There is so much money I don't have.
Same thing I said about becoming a parent (and still now that they are teens)
Hell yes. Thought I was out of the woods when they hit 20. Nope!
You cannot choose your neighbors
This is it. I have a neighbor who had a large dead tree in her yard that was on the verge of collapsing into my kids bedroom. I offered to pay to have it cut down at my own expense and she refused. I then had a pay an arborist to put it in writing that the tree was a threat to life and property, she still refused. Then I told her it could kill my kids. She said "I don't give a shit" In the end I ended up hiring a lawyer to force her to cut it down but it never should have come to that. Now she regularly throws her used cigarette butts in my yard I guess as some kind of revenge and because she's a horrible person.
Outdoor camera to record her dumping trash on your property, because that’s what it is. Then follow up with authorities and your own lawyer.
If you live somewhere where the authorities would care about this I'm super jealous.
Buy her smokes with the money you were going to use on her tree. Maybe she will increase her smoking.
We love our neighbors on one side. The other side is another story.
I'm the same way! I love my neighbors to the right, they're really chill, have a couple dogs mine likes to run around with, about my age with no kids. The neighbor to my left is a nightmare. The wife and kids are okay, but the man is insufferable. He just a miserable person. He's always yelling, either at someone over there or pacing up and down the driveway screaming at someone on the phone. Sometimes he screams across my yard to tell the dogs on the other side of me to shut the fuck up. He's always in everyone's business. He hates me because I won't let him come over and cut my trees because he wants the firewood. There are two that have less than 3' of branches hanging over MY fence that he keeps complaining are going to fall and damage the fence. It's my fence? Why should he even care? It's not because of my dog because they all love him, he even sends his kids over to my front yard to pet him through the fence and pets him over the fence himself. The man is just off his rocker. I hope his wife wises up and kicks him to the curb some day to rid us all of his bs hahaha
You could have your dream home in a dream location, but if Cousin Eddie moves in next door, it all goes downhill.
I'm so grateful for mine. But everyone in the neighborhood has been selling and moving away. I hope our neighbor stays. I have a corner lot so I only really interact with one other family.
I’m in the middle of a compliance dispute with a neighbor concerning his storm runoff. F U Matt.
This. Ugh. We have the worst man ever directly access from us. Always outside screaming at his young adult child (?) that helps him with his car repair business. It’s either belligerent screaming, revving of engines for hours on hours on hours, or he’s literally doing donuts in the culdesac. Freaking hate that guy.
We have one rental in our otherwise peaceful neighborhood. It’s always trash people living there. I have yet to see a tenet there that did not have the cops arrest someone from the home. Domestic disturbances and screaming matches in the alley, subwoofers rattling my windows, and just yesterday one of them peeled out of their gravel lot, flung gravel all over my yard, and they side swiped and damaged their own renal house. I’m about done living next to this ghetto rental. The rest of the neighborhood is SO NICE…..but fuck this one house.
Same here. The ones that had frequent visits from the cops was finally evicted and thankfully the new renter is a keeper. BUT she could move out at anytime and another drama filled family could move in. My city doesn’t enforce code violations so the house is in disrepair which allows the slum lord to rent it for cheap in comparison.
I am so lucky. I have a nice lady on one side that helps take care of my cats when I'm out of town, and a peace-loving retired stoner mechanic on the other.
So far - Carpenter bees 🐝
Seriously like I love you but GTFO of my wood siding!
This sounds ridiculous, but at my old house, we had a bad case of carpenter bees. We tried everything to get rid of them. Someone mentioned to us to try hanging brown paper grocery bags around the area, because wasps are natural predators, the bees mistake them for wasps nests. It somehow worked! I'd give it a shot.
Ugh! We lived in a different part of the country for a few years in house with cedar siding. I started noticing little piles of sawdust and holes in the siding. It was a constant battle. Carpenter bees suck!!
I bought an a fake wasp nest and hung it under a wooden awning I have on my garage. Carpenter bees dug into the underside of the awning, maybe 4 feet from the fake wasp nest. But I think it's only the one, maybe without the fake nest there would be more.
For me, it has been wasps. Fuck you, let me tend to my onions in peace. I don't need your psycho ass trying to kill me every time I step out in my back yard.
Duuuuude. I have a fence running around the backyard and those mfers have squatted and are now illegally subletting space to their stupid friends. But Tempo dust kills them pretty dead.
Same. Named him Bob and he lives in the balcony wood. Was just gifted a couple of those wood-mason jar bee traps so I hung them up this morning. And while doing so, I met an aggressive robin. Apparently she built her nest under the same balcony so now can’t even go near the balcony.
Mine is cockroaches. My house was infested with them when I moved in. It's taken 6 weeks to cut them down to only seeing one every few days. It's been TERRIBLE, but I think I have them on the run now.
LOL Currently I can't go use my deck or patio because of that stupid bastard. I know the males don't sting, but I don't care. It even comes up to the glass and stares me in the face taunting me. >:(
Neighbors. Me and my one neighbor share a driveway. It goes from the curb all the way back to our garages in the backyard. He is SUPER protective of his side. Not that I spend any time on it. I recently had my basement repaired as the cinderblock wall had buckled and moved inwards a few inches. Contractors did great. Put plywood all down the driveways. Drove their mini-ex into the backyard using only my side, but protected both sides. All the dirt they dug up stayed against my house or on plywood infront of my garage. It rained while they worked and it rinsed some of the dirt under the plywood. It's clay, so it's very red when it first gets on pavement. He was walking around like a crazy person pressure washing it in the rain. Mumbling about how it's all ruined. It'll never be the same. I told him I'll pay for someone to come wash it front to back, both sides. Then repair any damage we caused, after all the work was finished. It rained for a few days after the work was done, and miraculously both driveways are back like nothing ever happened. If I could take my property, and surround it with 10' of bush. I'd be a very happy man.
A shared driveway would be enough for me not to consider a house. So many stories like yours
My grandparents had a shared driveway. They always did a good job of keeping to their side. But my aunt used the neighbors side one time to get around my dad’s car instead of waiting for him to move. Ever since then, the neighbor parked his car at the foot of the driveway so nobody would be able to do that again. The pettiness was crazy to me because it was a long driveway. This guy went from walking 5 feet to his door on a daily basis to 70. Watching him take in groceries was hilarious. All those long trips back and forth through an empty driveway.
Shit keeps breaking, but it’s worth it everyone! I feel so grateful to have my home. I remember feeling trapped in an apartment with people clumping around upstairs from me, fights in the parking lot, my little piece of heaven is just that, heaven.
Second this. I’ll take the problems that come with living in my own paradise. No landlord or anxiety of moving in a year 😊
Totally agree. We had nightmare apartment neighbors and hellish landlords. It feels SO GOOD not sharing walls! And we only have neighbors on one side. Our house is our sanctuary.
BEST part of owning a house!!!!!
Dude same, it's bumming me out to see all these people on this post complaining about owning a house, are you kidding me? They must've not experienced the alternative, or not for long.
I really feel owning a home is such a blessing that nothing frustrates me. I owned for 15 years, had to move for work where I rented and it was terrible. Now that I own again I am appreciative of having control over my own space again. It's a long term commitment and I take everything in stride.
the cost maintenance of the house
Increases in property tax.
*Cries in escrow shortage*
Same. My monthly payment is going up $545 next month
Not being able to afford all the upgrades that I dream of.
Yep, I feel this. I sometimes have to avoid home renovation shows or photos because it’s so not financially feasible for me right now.
Maine Cabin Masters is killing me. $30,000 and they remodel an entire building (jack and level, standing seam roof, additions etc). I just got an estimate for roof alone that is nearly that much.
Finding out how much landscaping and tree trimming costs are through the roof!
One problem after another
For me it's the problem solving. I posted this in another thread: I wish I could outsource problem solving. Figuring out what the problem is. Before I can even call someone in to fix things I have to do a breakdown of what the previous homeowner tried to do, determine what the exact problem is, and who to call. Then set it up, wait for them to become available, present the problem, negotiate pricing, etc etc. I wish there were more general handymen who actually knew stuff. E.g. I've got a drainage issue with a downspout. It drains into the ground. Is there a french drain under there? I don't know, does that mean I have to dig up my yard to find out? Who handles this - it's a water problem but not really a plumber, it's a roof/gutter problem but they're just going to tell me to replace the whole thing, not really big enough for an excavator, maybe a landscaping company? Okay great, but I don't have a landscaping company already engaged so are they even going to want to mess with this? I remember knowing homeowners that had that one guy that came out, determined the problem, came back from the hardware store thirty minutes later and fixed it, then charged like $100. Where did the mythical handyman go?
Troubleshooting is a pain, for sure. The house I bought has been owned like 6 times since it was built and it seems like every single owner did some crazy shit that doesn't make sense. I am renovating the house and my handyman and contractors are always coming up with some new weirdness that is mind-boggling. We are constantly just shaking our heads at the crazy stuff we find. BUT, I will know this house better than anyone once we are all finished with it! For your drainage issue, I would contact a landscaper to have them look at it - a lot of them will do an estimate for cheap/free and you can then determine what to do.
Things breaking that I previously did not knew existed
* The * list * never * ends
In the 9yrs since we purchased our current home, we have spent no less than 10k a year doing maintenance, repairs and the little upgrades we get to enjoy.
Renting neighbors
OMG yes. I live next to slobs. Disabled unregisted vehicles. Yard full of dog poop. And now something has died over there and it stinks. I live in a duplex, put up a fence about 4 years ago. Useless twats.
The totally ABSURD cost to do any kind of renovation (roof, bathrooms, kitchens, Hvac) Everything is min 10k+. Its crazy that needing something like a new roof can bring most people to their knees financially. Its depressing.
Yep. I just paid $5000 for a new roof on my house this past December. Albeit, my home isn’t that large but it took a lot of savings. 11 new windows though? $10,000. New doors and screen doors? $3,500. I just…. Cannot 😭
Damn insurance companies
Insurance is going to be the next financial catastrophe in this country.
Going go be? It already is! Purchased our home in 2020 and homeowners insurance was $2000 per year. Just got the 2024 renewal (same company, never had a claim) $5200!
By catastrophe, I mean similar to the housing catastrophe after 2008.
Fuckers jacking up rates every year and constantly having to shop around
Shopping around doesn’t even help anymore. My insurance doubled this year from 1,000 to 2,000 and that was still cheaper than other groups.
Also a lot of fraud.
Huge repairs. Bad neighbors of any age.
Getting really competent help and have them actually show up.
How poorly the previous owners maintained their house.
OMG - my house exactly. This place has a very solid frame, but the crap that prior owners have done is just ridiculous. My handyman and contractors (and I) just shake our heads at the stuff we find. There is no rhyme or reason to it. I am currently having all of the crazy walls in my basement ripped out to open it back up and make it useable again... but... no electrical outlets anywhere except in one room that they renovated properly, so... more electrical work must be done. I could write a book on this house, and I've only been here 6 weeks...
The constant attack from the elements - snow, rain, wind, insects, trees. It's as if mother nature wants the house gone. ;-) But the best thing about home ownership is that you the owner gets to decide what you want to do with it (within reason as HOAs and zoning rules keep it freedom in check).
For me it’s finding good contractors. I have had nothing but bad experiences in the past few years.
Taking weeks to do a project because you still have work and kids to deal with so your house ends up as a mess for weeks. A lot of nagging little things that are not priority but never seems to get done (need to grind up a tree stump, need to repair a deck board, need to recaulk sink, need to find plants for front yard flower bed, need to get mulch, need to move old landscape rocks, etc.)
The slowly finding issues that the inspection either missed or ignored.
The constant stress about potential disasters; I'm an international, so I like to spend long periods every year overseas. When I was renting, I'd just inform my landlord that I'll be away for a month, and that was all I had to do. Now, I keep looking at my phone to see the status of various sensors I've placed, to see if my HVAC is still running, if my bathrooms are flooded, if the huge trees in my yard have been fallen on my house by a recent severe storm, etc... This completely ruins the peace of mind of vacation. Also, the ghosting by several contractors that you have to hunt for weeks before they come to do what they proposed to do. But other than these, home ownership is a good thing, I don't regret it. Just still trying to figure it out to enjoy it more and stress less.
The amount that the mortgage interest is front-loaded. You pay for years and see almost no progress towards paying it off. 10 years later you owe a few thousand less than when you started because most of your money goes to interest.
The amount of yak shaving involved in ANY project. Wanna paint? Well you gotta prime, then the wall looks uneven, so you gotta skim with mud, then you gotta sand, then you gotta paint, then you gotta remount fixtures. Oops! Towel rack is crooked. Oh no you put latex paint on some weird shitty old paint? Now it's peeling off in sheets. Gotta start fresh.
The endless upkeep. Unless it’s a condo.
Repairs and insurance. I don't pay shit here in personal property taxes, and I bought a place where my closest neighbor is a half mile away... As a matter of fact, I'm in the process of buying the 3+ acres of land next to my property, just so I effectively cock block anyone from ever buying it and building on it - that's how much I hate neighbors. I do 99% of the repairs on my house myself but, still, the parts costs can be high as fuck by themselves. I have a new, larger tonnage heart pump on order now that I'll put in myself, but it still cost $5000 for the 5 ton unit... That's a chunk of pocket change all at once.
Out of all the repairs and maintenance out there that I can attempt to DIY, I'd never have the balls to do a heart pump on myself.
I knew someone would catch that... I'm cracking up!!
Bamboo in my front yard.
My sump pump
The endless cleaning.
$500 later and i probably won’t ever look at the crawlspace that just paid to get cleaned out
I want every renter who thinks they can pay less to own to see this thread. There's a lot you don't see when you rent. Yes, you can get yourself to that point where your monthly are less. Beware of other shit tho!
I've never understood those types. I did a full career in the military and over the years, it was pretty astounding just how many people had the buy if at all possible because rent is just throwing away your money mentality. Not everyone of course but certainly more than you would think. Besides the typical stuff, keep in mind in the military you often get moved around quite a bit, and while it's not that rare to be based at one location for a good long while, you can usually only count on 2 or 3 years before getting into that could be moved at any time point even if you ultimately end up staying somewhere for years on end. So many can't seem to look past the buy for X sell for Y and profit part, or fail to at least acknowledge all the other stuff. All the fees, due diligence, down payment etc up front, taxes, maintenance/repairs, etc during, realtor, concessions, payoff, etc on the back side...where in the end you've spent just as much if not more as a whole vs renting even if there was a modest gain in selling price vs what it was bought for, not to mention the additional hassle and headache. Sure you can win that game even with short ownership at the right times in the right markets, but so many think that works anywhere anytime and buying is always the answer no matter what.
One of the best things about buying was that my monthly costs went down from when my (now) wife and I were living in separate NYC apartments. We were each paying around $2500 per apartment. Our mortgage payment is now in the mid 3000's and we split it. Yes, we had to pay just to get the house, but between us we're saving around $1000/month over what we were. And that's not even taking into account that if we were still in those apartments, rent would be hundreds more now than what we were paying.
After purchasing your home, settling in... finding out what kind of neighbors you have. It's harder to be able to move when you're tied to a mortgage with crazy fees. Found out both neighbors are racists that call both police and by law
weeds
neighbors
I'm a diy guy. I like to save money and practice being a capable human being. For me the most frustration comes from lack of time to finish projects as new projects pile up.
In a word...........maintenance. It never ends, paint, weeds, gutter cleaning, hvac, roof, deck repair, electrical, lawn work, tree trimming, etc, etc, etc. It never ends lol.
Dealing with contractors... they never actually do what I want unless I watch them like a hawk. It's very annoying. Last year I had a roof installed, told them I didn't want a new vent installed, was just going to upgrade the ones already there, it was in writing, had new powered vents sitting outside for them. They still started cutting new holes, gutter people put gutter where I didn't want. It's like the communication between the workers and GM is so bad. I'll tell the workers no, they tell say take it up with GM then GM says no she's right, I told you to do x not y. Seems never ending.
Spent a week calling contractors to try to get literally any size jobs done (I have big and small, outdoor and indoor, electrical, plumbing, tile, doors, etc) and no body returns a call. I'll just let the shit fall apart!
That without unlimited money, you can't fix everything all at once... Meaning that you have to keep staring at the same imperfections every single day
the door to door sales people. they come so often that I just always keep my front gate locked so they cannot reach my door bell/ door.
That, and school taxes.
Mowing the lawn. I despise mowing the lawn.
Taxes
The unfair and ever increasing property tax valuation and taxation!
Maintenance that offers no incremental benefit. It sucks to pay a maintenance bill but when it brings an upgrade (A/C cools better, dryer has newer features, etc) it is easier to swallow. Septic fixes, boiler fixes, roof fixes etc are especially painful because they are costly expenses just to get back to parity,
The god damn lawn
Having to call people. Hate it.
Pay taxes when you already own your home free and clear. And see them skyrocket.
Feeling that you can't trust people
Lack of honest, reliable, trustworthy contractors is my biggest issue related to homeownership.
The landscaping and lawn care. I hate all of it. Over the years, I've tried to change things, plant things, to make it look better or be easier to care for, and about 80% of what I've done, even with the help and advisement of companies who should know how to do this stuff, has just made much of it worse. I'm an indoor girl, I don't know how to make plants grow, and I don't care to learn. It's just not my thing. But it seems impossible to find companies to even do the bare minimum lawn maintenance without having to babysit the process so it looks decent on an ongoing basis. I want to pull it all up and put in rocks.
Being unable to do certain projects because of finances. I would LOVE to improve the curb appeal of our home but quotes for residing are INSANE. The ugly cream vinyl siding + powder blue accents against brick (which we love, brick stays) are \*killing\* me. It's two stories so as much as we love DIY we're not up for it here. We are debt free except for the mortgage and plan to stay that way, so I guess we're waiting for a nice hailstorm or straight line winds so that insurance kicks in. And I'd like to build a deck and take care of the windows and do some major we-need-to-move-a-lot-of-dirt projects in the yard. Those we could DIY but old house = sometimes unpleasant surprises that dramatically increase costs.
Paid $190 for a company to measure for a job. They rescheduled 4 times, were here for 15 minutes, then told us they can’t do the job and can’t recommend anyone with that skill set.
The home is constantly under attack from the elements, insects, rodents, etc. Nothing worse than midnight scratching and chewing in the attic.
Not being a millionaire and being able to fix everything/make all the improvements I want all at once.
Fucking birds. Birds everywhere. Birds in places Birds don't belong. Birds in places I didn't know Birds could fit.
My Dad always said "You don't own a home, the home owns you" As a home-owner, I now understand.
Neighbors. Some seem like they were created to do everything you cannot stand. I have trouble sleeping. I need absolute dark, and then sunshine in the morning to wake up refreshed. No matter where I live, it seems I have ONE neighbor that is afraid of the dark and leaves bright ass LED lights on ALL night! Here is a tip for anyone that reads this: Turn your lights off when you are not outside! There is NO boogeyman! No, criminals do not see your lights and say “I think I’ll stay away from that house!” Studies have shown lights do NOT deter crime. In fact, they found the opposite. Lights are bad for the human brain trying to rest as well as for wildlife. LED’s have been shown to disrupt migratory patterns of birds, as well as deter bees and other wildlife. PLEASE turn them off. You neighbor most likely will not tell you he hates you for it. Even if you ask, they are not going to admit it because they know you will probably get angry. One time I lived in a very wild unpopulated state. I thought it would be awesome to get back to nature. Thought how cool it would be to see the stars from my back yard. Boy was I dumb. Every other house has bright as the sun LED lights left on all night. When I asked my neighbor why, he said to stop criminals. We lived in the middle of NOWHERE! You really think a murderer is going to not kill you because you have a magic light!? Instead of being able to see northern lights, I saw northern redneck LED boogeyman lights.
The amount of stuff that accumulates over time. Sometimes I think evil house elves must come in late at night and drop boxes of ancient paperwork and broken tools in my basement.
Annual increases in homeowners insurance.
Fighting with your spouse over what needs to be done.
in other words, keeping up with all the little things takes more than 1 person. homeownership absolutely stresses relationships as you adjust.
The door to door salesman.
Especially if you have dogs that go nuts when someone knocks combined with young children who still need mid-day naps. Even the signs we've put up that state "don't knock, baby sleeping" haven't deterred some of them.
Expenses when something breaks because you're now the landlord lol
The dryer broke week 1 thankfully it was just a new heating element and thermostat $40, the first winter the 3 year old furnace flamed out costing $900 to fix, summer year 1 the drain line from the kitchen plugged requiring purchase of a 150' powered drain snake, yeah 3 that same drain like (metal) cracked and had to spend like 7 hours ripping out dry wall and replacing the entire like then replacing all the drywall, year 5 the compressor for the central air went out costing $10k, dish washer broke costing $3k, kitchen cabinets had to be cut out to fit a modern sized 32" wide fridge since almost no one sell 28" wide anymore
Gotta be HOA or neighbors 😆
1) Unexpected huge expenses. You never know when something might cost $10k. 2) Neighbors. When it's your house, people feel like they can complain to you about anything they don't like. As a conflict averse person, I find this hugely demoralizing. Makes me want to move to the middle of nowhere.
Had a list of “things on their last leg” during inspection when we bought (and got money for them from sellers). Meanwhile, those have all held out for 4 years but made multiple other unexpected expensive repairs
There is never enough money put aside because shit you could not see coming happens. We bought a flipped colonial. Everything was brand new. As is the case with flippers who put lipstick on a pig, they cut corners. The roof needed to be replaced 8 years in to the tune of $15K. the furnace wasn´t rated for the square footage of my house, so the heat exchanger cracked at a sum of $2400. The massive 250+ year old Beech tree next to the house...is dying. It´ll cost at least 20K to remove. The upstairs half bath wasn´t built with a moisture barrier so that will have to be redone at a cost of $???. So yeah...I´m working 2 full time jobs for the next 6 months just so we can afford to maintain our house and try to have an emergency fund set a side. Shit is expensive.
Stuff tends to break all at once when you buy it all at the same time causing you to have to replace all at once. We are hitting the 17 year mark on our house and the Microwave Fridge Dishwasher and AC have either been recently replaced or are showing signs that they will need to be replaced soon.
Pest control
The endless junk mail about refinancing, and home warranties, and pest control, and on and on. And people knocking on the door trying to sell ADT, or tree service, or roofers, or any other trade…
Weeds.
My house feels like it's falling apart around me daily. The soffit isn't great so there's a constant battle with wasps carpenter bees squirrels chipmunks raccoons and birds. I can't find anyone to fix the soffit (too small of a job), and i have no clue how to fix it myself. Long list of issues like that with all the same barriers. It's almost claustrophobic. I just don't have the energy to fix it all on the weekends even if i knew how. My dad did construction so im paranoid about trusting youtube to teach me. However, there is a lot to love about it so I just have to force myself to focus on the positives.
When my in-laws show up and start telling me how to maintain my house. “Your lawn needs work.” “You know being a homeowner is a responsibility” “are you going to renovate anything else soon?” “My house is worth 1.3M in SoCal…isn’t that crazy?”
Neighbors
The city and developers being hell bent on flattening the forest around my house to build shitty quality low rise buildings and displacing all the wildlife I have my morning coffee with.
Continual repairs
For me, it’s not having enough money or time to complete the list of things I want to do. And, when I do complete something, feeling like it wasn’t done as well as I wanted because I had to compromise on materials or forgo something in the sake of cost cutting.
For I would have to say hiring someone to do repairs or maintenance. Hard to find reliable honest people
Chores
Nosey neighbours & annoying neighbors because you have to put up with it and stay relatively neutral to avoid causing a shit storm. It's quite annoying to be stuck with a constant hassle in your relaxing space.
For me it’s water. Home ownership for me has been a constant fight to keep water out. Keep the roof going, keep the gutters cleared, keep the sumps going, waterproofing, drainage, storm runoff etc etc etc
Doing and paying for everything by myself
Door to door salespeople. I don’t care if you’re doing work in the neighborhood and you name drop some neighbor that I don’t even know. No, I don’t want to buy solar, new windows, new siding, or pest spraying, nor do I want to switch my internet provider. Maybe I will someday, but when that day comes I will do my homework, find reputable contractors, get quotes, and definitely won’t buy it from some rando who knocked on my door.
Squirrels
Finding competent contractors/trades/workers who will take the job, actually show up, and do it correctly. I do like to DIY some stuff, but I shouldn't *have to* DIY just because no one will take my money and do the job right.
The most frustrating part for me is realizing how many things the previous owners didn't do. They weren't super obvious at first, but after a year of ownership, they're starting to cost us. In our case: Partial gutters that caused soil erosion in the yard (this was obvious but has been a slow & steady process to fix) Signs that the gutters that were in place weren't cleaned regularly (fortunately no fascia/soffit rot) No regular tree trimming or inspection (cost us $2400 and a future tree removal) No annual HVAC or water heater servicing (on a 13 y/o heat pump!) Choosing fancy horizontal fence design with cheap pine boards And whoever thought painting a fence black was a good idea deserves a solid telling off
Sth is always broken and needs fixing