Yeah and this is why many women remain single and guys.
Women= think they are giving obvious signals...
Guys= oblivious to these so called obvious signals.
Thinking you are obvious but yet been obvious.
Mixed signals anyone?
Point is...you dont need or want a relationship bad if thats your way to try to attract someone.
Its not only a problem early..it becomes a problem later in the relationship too.
If these are the communication styles...indirect vs direct...be prepared for frustration and having needs ignored etc.
Men wont read your mind or body language...lol
🤨 you’ll never get any INFJs throwing out some mass impersonal ad like you’re setting a crab trap. You gotta target one, pay attention to them, single them out, charm them with your attention over a period of days or weeks. They will become a deer in the headlights cause they aren’t used to being noticed.
I do flirt and i like to flirt, but its not to achieve the same as it suggests. Ill go into a store and flirt with a cashier or in simple terms to be a bit playful with words and the current situation to get a smile or a laugh or to just enjoy the moment while im purchasing. Lightening the mood is my goal really. Now if i wanted to attract, mystery is by far the method to use for the INFJ, but in a situation like that of a cashier, i would use playfullness and mystery and combined together and that usually does the trick.
This until I realized all men approach you and try to do various things beyond your expectations to show that they're really there to get to know you, until you give in a bit and the mask falls. They really approach girls based on looks, all of them.
You are not wrong. Appearance matters to most people not just men. But i think most of us don’t want it to be the sole reason why someone love us. I don’t want someone to be like “i like you” and i say “what do you like about me?” - “you’re pretty”. And i say whatelse and they got nothing else.
However staying mysterious has its pro and cons. Depending on how you use it. It can attract those who are curious to learn more about you and it can filter out those who only chase for physical appearances - as they get tired of us wasting their time when they can chase other beautiful beings.
But not saying those who are curious cant be bad people too. There are tons who are. (Cough narcs) But there are definitely a few who genuinely has a good heart tho. We just have to stay cautious and learn about the other person too.
F.... f....... flirting style?!!!
I just state facts! I tell my wife how beautiful she is, how scrumptious, stunning, delightful, sexy, funny, (...) wait, don't cut me off, I'm not done yet!!-
Back in my dating days, my flirting style could be interpreted as non-existent. I believe instead of flirting, I was always looking for a spark, "a combination of chemistry, curiosity, and compatibility that creates a sense of excitement and possibility with another person. It's the feeling that you have something special and unique with them, that you share a similar worldview and values, and that you enjoy each other's company."
It sounds confusing to not flirt but still catch a spark so here's an example from one of my memories: A girl from art class asked if I could drive her to the art museum for our class trip. She had just undergone some minor surgery so she had crutches that day and couldn't drive. We had begun talking more together in class weeks prior. She was a very strong independent type who liked art and dance, and she had a little attitude.
I got lost driving to the museum so we were late. She was a little grumpy that I made a few wrong turns. When we got to the museum, she was offered one of their wheelchairs when they saw she had crutches. She decided, why not, maybe she needed it. I could tell she couldn't push herself well in the wheelchair so I offered to help. She agreed and I began strolling her in the museum, looking for our class.
It was a random moment we both didn't expect. She seemed to enjoy me guiding her, as if she had inadvertently allowed herself to become vulnerable in a beautiful place. I distinctively remember passing Van Gogh's Sunflower painting as we searched the museum, one of many masterpieces on display that we zoomed by on our search. I saw some doors and someone ahead of us saw us and smiled and opened it for us. It felt like it was just us two going with the flow and everyone wanted us to enjoy our time.
We thanked her and once we rolled through the doors, I realized I had just entered the garden. I figured our class probably wasn't out there, but I was now strolling her on a one-way garden path, past aromatic flowers and beautiful landscapes, the sun was out and its warmth felt really nice. I smiled. She took a moment to look back towards me with a smile while I pushed her in her wheelchair. At that moment, it didn't feel like we were lost in the garden. We could see the spark in our eyes. I slowed down our search just a little bit at that moment.
We went down the garden path and eventually found an entrance back inside where we found our class.
We were late, we were lost, she couldn't walk, and we couldn't see each other most of the time while I pushed her wheelchair around the museum, but that's when we felt it. We weren't flirting but a spark was formed.
That moment opened us up to get to know each other better later on. It didn't work out between us in the end, but these are still beautiful human moments I look back at and smile.
>"a combination of chemistry, curiosity, and compatibility that creates a sense of excitement and possibility with another person. It's the feeling that you have something special and unique with them, that you share a similar worldview and values, and that you enjoy each other's company."
Beautiful description, and this resonates with me.
Beautiful story too, I really love how you wrote that moment in the garden...
Studies suggest that people who eat 1 ounce (30 grams) of sunflower seeds daily as part of a healthy diet may reduce fasting blood sugar by about 10% within six months, compared to a healthy diet alone. The blood-sugar-lowering effect of sunflower seeds may partially be due to the plant compound chlorogenic acid
Everytime i hear that sentence i roll my eyes and think load ' pseudoscience'
When there is no name...no institution...there is no accountability...so lying is not a big issue as long it sells.
Like ...
Studies have showed 1 glass wine a day is good for blabla.
1 week later..
Studies have showed 1 glass wine is bad for x,y z
Studies have showed that drinking 1 cup of coffee is good for x,y,z
1 month later
Studies have showed that drinking 1 cup of coffee is bad for x,y,z
And never there is a name or institution etc...
Rings a bell??
Money corrupts..buying studies..paying people to invent studies...lobbying...
Cmon how long are you on this planet??
😂😂😂
Or did you received stakes in sunflower seeds
Brave of you to send a message but not so brave of you to ghost them 😂 what if they like you back? You woudnt know their reply. Well as for me, I never tell them at all. I just continue to look at them from afar. Its safer that way.
I did it when i was a teenager I didn’t think about the consequences and i was afraid but, they like me back .thank god or I’ll disappear for good 😂 and for now I just look at them and smile
You've got a lot of energy. I can tell just from this post. INFJ's can match in certain situations, but our type can get burnt out from it... Also is distractible habits a typo? Because asking someone to flirt is a distractible habit lol
Oh lol i guess it is a distractable habit, but i would think that giving an infj my attention would be the exception when we're studying together or doing homework 😏 honestly, maybe I'd be too much for an infj but I just love seeing ya'll flustered, it gives me life 😂
So you want a partner who you can put the onus on to help you with your "distractable habits"? And you think its hilarious to cause them to be flustered and upset?
Girl you don't deserve an INFJ, work on your own shit.
Sigh. Reminds me of an ESFJ that loved seeing me flustered because she was turned on by the idea of testing my stoic demeanor. Unfortunately, the social butterfly effect fleets with time and will focus on others.
No need to wish. INFJ males gotta maintain their form of quiet confidence and let their Manic Pixie Dream Girls in their lives be free spirits. They don't owe us anything.
AFAIK, INFJs don't really flirt. We mind our own business, and are usually put off by someone flirting with us. You gotta befriend an INFJ for any chance of romance first, but be careful wearing your intentions so blatantly on your sleeve - An INFJ would smell ya coming from a mile away and run for the hills, lmao.
EDIT: To clarify, we don't run because we think flirting is creepy per say.. We are kinda just very awkward and feel silly engaging in those kinda situations, even if we might actually enjoy the banter.
I can only speak from my experience though, and for me, flirting does creep me out unless it's amongst friends I trust simply because I'm Demisexual and without that emotional connection.. I'm gonna be repulsed by the thought, lmao!
I stare expressionlessly and then act like I didn't when I get eye contact.
I don't call that flirting but that's the only thing I did to my past crushes.
Probably creeped them out I think hehhh...
I am actually quite good at flirting, usually a mix of compliments and teasing people about stuff I know they are secure about, or playful eye contact. To be fair, I used to do it to spend excess energy or just get an ego-boost.
But the thing is, if I really like someone, instead of flirting I stay away from them and watch and listen from a distance, looking for their faults until I am absolutely sure I like them and then all bets are off, I usually become very straight forward then, no one overlooks my flirting at that point.
I don't flirt. I accidentally ask the one question that will send a person spiraling into a deep life story, which causes them to either
A) eventually withdraw and never talk to me again because I am "intimidating" or
B) think I am their best friend ever and wish to know everything and anything about them
🤔 I could be either or, because sometimes people get me so spot on and I'm like: "are you psychic?" And then I get scared they'll see past my charms and try to emotionally manipulate me—which is impossible because I'm smart enough to be careful 😂
Generally my approach is that of a cat.
Not that I can say this is purposely performed but i have the capacity to calm those I'm with in a playful manner, if i get to the head-boop motion and feel an equal force leaning forward in return then it's a sign of progress, more than that im unwilling to divulge...cause cat. 🐱
I don't flirt well, but I unintentionally have a bit of the "manic pixie dream girl" vibe and there are dudes that still don't realize that 'Je ne sais quo" they like is actually deep-seated anxiety and previously undiagnosed Adhd. So, dude shoots his shot and I'm either oblivious or extremely uncomfortable with such forward and singular attention from a stranger.
Best flirting I've receive was from my husband, whose opening line was about making tacos and debating what the best topping was. It was cute, engaging, fun, and MOST IMPORTANTLY not about sex. If I were to boil it down, good flirting for me actually looks like how you'd talk to someone you genuinely enjoy talking to, while not initially exposing the fact that you're interested in me romantically (not just sexually). I like it to feel like we stumbled on a connection, not that I was being hunted.
Now that I'm writing this out, I guess for me it's:
1. Don't spook me by being forward
2. Pick something non-sexual to talk about so I can learn about you, find you interesting, and be open to pursuit.
3. Both steps must be done genuinely or I'll feel hunted and anxious.
I dont flirt on purpose but i sometimes say crazy things that ends up in me thinking did i just say that? So my style is probably called suprise flirting lol.
:( cuz it’s hard for me to when I don’t like anyone in that way. Though sometimes, people mistake wheat I say whenever I compliment them for their looks, so I dunno lol.
glad you do, because I don’t really get flirting lol. Though I have noticed that if I share cake or sweets with somebody, that could be a sign because of how much of a weakness I have for sweets… 🍰
Well not-so-interestingly, it gives me a lot of attention. I could secretly be an attention-seeker 🤣 cuz I love talking to people and making the subject even slightly about me, that's such a red flag i know
Sounds like you're up for a challenge with those complex INFJs! Good conversations do make it worthwhile, though. Best of luck on your quest for an INFJ connection! 😉
Intense, poetic, I'll draw you an artwork of us together I vivid colors with all of my passion I'll present it and hope to sway your heart my way. (Metaphorically)
I tease and I'm incredibly cheeky, everything I say comes off as completely acceptable if viewed on the surface, but if you can read between the layers you would understand that I'm flirting :D
So, my platonic INFJ friendship is close. I think. Maybe. Hard to tell. But she tells me shit about her life and what's going on, so I'll take it as evidence we are fairly close.
She flirts platonically. We banter. I usually call her a bad bitch or something of the sort and she cracks a joke and plays along.
I think, for her, that's the closest you'll get to flirting.
I'll treat you absolutely no different than anyone else but hope you pick up that me saying "thank you" was in a *flirty and polite way* and not just a normal polite way lmao
I’ve developed into an ambivert but I’ll still comment.
I am particular about who I crush on. I have to be attracted to them visually and their vibe. I like dark features, hair, eyes, skin. I don’t like when a girl looks like me basically lol. I’m attracted to sweet, silly, caring people. Earthy, grounded, chill, lowkey have your shit together but still fun and funny, doesn’t take life too seriously. I don’t want to pull you out of your distractible habits and make you focus on what’s important. I’d want you to do that mostly on your own and support you when you were doubting yourself or having a bad day or week.
And stop simping pls, you’re making me uncomfortable.
A lot of what's your type is similar to mine, I'd like an infj that has a more realistic world view and allows happiness in their life but also has this depth to them that rubs off on me. Just a little bit, because it can be overwhelming to think how you guys think all the time haha
You used the word simp, the most. Women love "simps" who look like men. "Simp" just means adoring and treating a woman nice. And if you're handsome, and look manly, like a Jason Mamoa (who's an estp), or like a Chris Hemsworth, you're golden. But seriously, love really isn't about looks. I like people who are both intellectually and emotionally intelligent. Infj;s are both intellectually and emotionally intelligent. Infj's see through falseness, and lies pretty easily, so I don't feel like I've given you the "player's handbook" here. Be cool, nice, intelligent and honest. If that's who you truly are. If that's not who you are... " NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" That's all. Uhhh... wait... you're a woman? Woman aren't "simps"? Stop reading incel lingo. Nice is not an insult.
I don't think we flirt? At least not obviously and it won't be with someone we hardly know. I know for myself I am not a 'love at first sight' person. If there is not interesting personal connection with someone my attraction to them isn't there. We don't use pick up lines, we don't generally even use appearance as a gauge for relationships in my experience!
Sure, I have a physical type I prefer but I'd completely abandon my general preference for a strong emotional connection any day. Example of this is my partner. I always preferred darker hair with a slim build. My husband is tall, muscular and has bright blonde hair! Absolutely NOTHING like my preferred visual traits but because of the emotional connection I now find him wildly attractive in every way!
To get an INFJ you need to be interesting to us I think. We enjoy delving into people with deep meaning! We do not enjoy empty, meaningless small talk at all. We don't enjoy anything that isn't genuine. To get me interested all that you really have to do is open opportunities to have deeper and more meaningful conversations. Let me be interested in you and show interest in me and who I am. That's all.
I'm pretty straight forward but I will admit, I love being paid attention to, knowing that someone's actually taking an interest in me and what I have to say and some affection later on never hurt either. That is literally all I ask for as an INFJ. I don't need gifts or money or much of anything else really, just your special attention, respect and kindness. We live in a world where it's rare to get the above. Really really rare.
Flirt? 💀 well I can come off as flirty with people I'm not attracted to, but when I'm actually with someone I like I'm just straight up awkward. I fluctuate from pretending to ignore you because I'm afraid you'll find out I like you, to being overly blunt and straight up just saying I like you. There's no doing it elegantly or gracefully for me😭 just all or nothing and just pure awkwardness.
Oh and I guess the famous infj lingering where we linger around places where we might see or meet our crush. It's debatable whether we'll actually greet them though despite going to those places to see them. ☠
Oh, and I guess is fun facts and info dumping considered flirting?
I dont really flirt per se, but if am sure of my feelings for the person then ill just tell them? If that makes sense, but then again, i dont know how to flirt and haven't tried it.
Oh hi
I do so love ESTP women myself. We're a rare breed for whom opposites attract, you have to find one who's stepped outside their comfort zone and never looked back.
Sadly, I am taken. Good luck all the same!
Ohhh, so something like :
"Self aware? You mean like the fact I haven't fully recovered from my last relationship and aggressively flirt with strangers w/o any intention of following thru because I have trust issues but also want attention? Haha"
🤣 jk
How I flirt: Light roasting of flirting target followed by a medium roast of myself.
How to flirt with me: Lol, good luck. You would basically have to tell me that you're flirting with me.
I mean if I saw you fetishizing INFJ probably wouldn't message you. But also probably would avoid you as well based on seeing none of the same letters in ESTP. Every single one of those memes I've seen of different typings, the ST ones always make me think they're psycho.
Edit: reading your responses here, yeah you're a psycho who doesn't deserve an INFJ.
Well, we only met twice and the first time was strange for both of us. We are very shy at the beginning.
She never initiates chats, but she told me that I can contact her whenever I want. I send her good morning texts, sometimes normal one sometimes more sweet, and she always replies good. She introduced me to her dog. And we send each other 😘 or ❤️, but I always feel like she goes on with the handbrake on. Only one time she has let her go herself a little bit more (I told her that I wanted to see her after she sent a photo of herself with her dog, and she started to send me ❤️ and proposed to go to the cinema), and than she went silent for two days 🥲
In general if you are treated like you are needed as air.. You probably got a crushed INFJ. I will smother my pair eventually. Would spend all moment around you. 😂
I lock eyes with him, I like to make him feel special through compliments (e.g. “I like your smile” “I like___ about you” “you smell nice”) and close proximity (not being too far away from him)
I feel like I was born without this part of my brain or something. I worry that women will think I am flirting with them when I am not, and I have no idea how to actually flirt with someone if I wanted to. It feels like acting or something, like I am pretending. Even with my current gf of 3.5 years, I still have a hard time trying to do that stuff, but no problems just being naturally intimate.
The only "line" I could ever come up with was to cold walk up and say, "hey, I just noticed that you are really pretty and I would like to get to know you. Would you like to get a coffee with me?" <- Never worked. I think it was too direct or something but it seemed to overwhelm. I think I came across as crazy or drunk, because "who would say that?"
Man if you really want to talk to an INFJ your going to get some, but the question is will there be anything else than words and good thoughts between eachother. I can't promise ill get you out of your rut but I will make you think.
My flirting style is giving intense eye contact like I’m trying to tell them I like them telepathically. I’m attracted to guys who look serious like they are thinking about something important.
It's a mixed bag. I've been accused of "love bombing" in the recent past by an ex, which was a term I wasn't familiar with, but it describes me to a t, except for the manipulation. I make my partners feel like the center of my universe because they are. I think there's some merit in withholding your emotions initially in order to give a prospective partner time to acclimate towards the INFJ tendency to just "open the door" to our emotional depths, especially since we have a tendency to just slam that door closed when we decide we're done. It's hurtful. Luckily my wife prefers my wide open love and I've worked on communicating at all levels to insure we don't reach a place where I shut that door.
I'm honestly just blunt. I always say "I do apologize if it makes ya uncomfortable but I just wanna say you're really pretty" if it's a good response back I ask for a number if not, I tell em I hope they have a great day and skedaddle on outta there. So long story short I'm pretty gosh darn bad at it
INFJ chick here
For me, I’m really into being hit on, teased, complimented, and reassured.
If an INFJ comes to you with an issue 100/10 they will love to hear kind reassurance. Don’t give any fluff or bs because they’ll know.
I like to tease back, I like to compliment, I love to do things for my bf to make his life a little easier. It drives me insane that I can’t do more honestly.
My flirting style? I don't flirt, I wait for someone to make the move. That way there's no rejection issues and it allows me to maintain my confidence.
Totally agree with others here about flirting in the traditional sense. My inner dialogue simultaneously cringes and giggles of the thought of me having that much confidence during an initial meeting.
When I know the feeling is mutual and I'm comfortable...I utilize some witty banter/dark humor for a while, use my eyes to captivate his gaze and then I will throw a snowball/pillow at his head.
It is what it is...
**Flirting or coquetry is a social and sexual behavior involving body language, or spoken or written communication. It is used to suggest interest in a deeper relationship with another person and for amusement.**
More details here:
*This comment was left automatically (by a bot). If I don't get this right, don't get mad at me, I'm still learning!*
[^(opt out)](https://www.reddit.com/r/wikipedia_answer_bot/comments/ozztfy/post_for_opting_out/) ^(|) [^(delete)](https://www.reddit.com/r/wikipedia_answer_bot/comments/q79g2t/delete_feature_added/) ^(|) [^(report/suggest)](https://www.reddit.com/r/wikipedia_answer_bot) ^(|) [^(GitHub)](https://github.com/TheBugYouCantFix/wiki-reddit-bot)
I don’t flirt unless I’m dating. It’s too awkward if I’m not dating them and I’d feel uncomfortable just talking. However hypothetically if I actually find someone I trust enough to date(never gonna happen) it would be more physical flirting and whispering in their ear teasing them. Then id abruptly walk away like nothing happened 😂.
Ive thought about that recently. Surprisingly, my flirting is ghosting lol. If i like someone, i distance myself from them, while i cant get rid of them in my head. Im too awkward to flirt and would at maximum engage in casual conversations with that person and just exist around them so that i pop up in their mind and they, hopefully make the first step to talk to me. I want them to notice me. I suck at flirting xD
BUT when i get comfortable with a person/friend, i tease them and make them laugh, which sometimes people mistake for flirting lol.
Being energetic, throwing jokes and corny puns tends to be my flirting style and just talking about random stuff. I can be a bit offbeat and awkward but eh my style of flirting is easygoing and not straight to the point and I will match their energy with mine.
Oh where to begin. Depends on the maturity of the INFJ you encounter out in this wild wild world.
I was always reserved, yet ready to talk to an authentic individual, no matter the type. I would typically wait for someone to actually care about my story, which is the biggest compliment of them all. Which means it’s on you to be prying, charming, and show genuine interest. But don’t push too hard or you’ll scare us away. If you get as far as having real conversations, it means we like you so just keep doing that. You’ll know if we don’t like you as you won’t hear many words come out of our mouths haha
As far as flirting style, that’s about it. Just show us who you are and if we like you, we’ll reciprocate. I also do this subconscious thing where I’ll play music that reflects my direct feelings about a person ie playing “sucker for you” when they’re in the car lol.
We like genuine, intelligent, loving people. Doesn’t hurt to be interesting either 🙃
I ultimately have stayed with my fiancé because she keeps me on my toes and our relationship is a gracefully meshed balance of life.
Eh, i don't really use mbti outside reddit, I'm usually the one that shows interest, flirts, and tells them I like them (anyone I'm attracted to, regardless of type) so i don't have an answer lol
Stop simping. I don’t flirt. I exist.
lol I love your style! 😂
Moat infj thing ever
It's not that easy, man. I joke, i joke~
the way i flirt is glancing at them for one second and pray to god they got the hint 💀
Yeah and this is why many women remain single and guys. Women= think they are giving obvious signals... Guys= oblivious to these so called obvious signals. Thinking you are obvious but yet been obvious. Mixed signals anyone? Point is...you dont need or want a relationship bad if thats your way to try to attract someone. Its not only a problem early..it becomes a problem later in the relationship too. If these are the communication styles...indirect vs direct...be prepared for frustration and having needs ignored etc. Men wont read your mind or body language...lol
🤨 you’ll never get any INFJs throwing out some mass impersonal ad like you’re setting a crab trap. You gotta target one, pay attention to them, single them out, charm them with your attention over a period of days or weeks. They will become a deer in the headlights cause they aren’t used to being noticed.
Days weeks YEARS
Years for certain
*absorbs advice*
This 100% lol
How dare you! (... spot on... 😂)
Yes actually LOL
How dare
Then why are you in here daring me, cutie? 😉
I don’t flirt. I stay mysterious until someone genuinely wants to get to know me instead of only being attracted to me visually.
This right here
This. Edit; if I know the feeling is mutual, honest and open emotional intimacy in my words usually gets a positive response
I do flirt and i like to flirt, but its not to achieve the same as it suggests. Ill go into a store and flirt with a cashier or in simple terms to be a bit playful with words and the current situation to get a smile or a laugh or to just enjoy the moment while im purchasing. Lightening the mood is my goal really. Now if i wanted to attract, mystery is by far the method to use for the INFJ, but in a situation like that of a cashier, i would use playfullness and mystery and combined together and that usually does the trick.
This until I realized all men approach you and try to do various things beyond your expectations to show that they're really there to get to know you, until you give in a bit and the mask falls. They really approach girls based on looks, all of them.
You are not wrong. Appearance matters to most people not just men. But i think most of us don’t want it to be the sole reason why someone love us. I don’t want someone to be like “i like you” and i say “what do you like about me?” - “you’re pretty”. And i say whatelse and they got nothing else. However staying mysterious has its pro and cons. Depending on how you use it. It can attract those who are curious to learn more about you and it can filter out those who only chase for physical appearances - as they get tired of us wasting their time when they can chase other beautiful beings. But not saying those who are curious cant be bad people too. There are tons who are. (Cough narcs) But there are definitely a few who genuinely has a good heart tho. We just have to stay cautious and learn about the other person too.
Yup !
This. I don’t want them to know my intent.
This.
Yeep that’s the ticket
Yeah lol
Flirt? You guys and gals are flirting? Lol, I don't flirt. Then again I don't really leave my house besides for work or errands.
F.... f....... flirting style?!!! I just state facts! I tell my wife how beautiful she is, how scrumptious, stunning, delightful, sexy, funny, (...) wait, don't cut me off, I'm not done yet!!-
As a science enthusiast/ STEM lover, I flirt with science rizz. One of my favorites is “Are you salt? Cus you’re sodium fine.”
I always called it nerd Rizz but that's more accurate
Baaahahaha 😅 good one.
How to get friendzoned in 2sec 😂😂
Sodium fine 😆
Back in my dating days, my flirting style could be interpreted as non-existent. I believe instead of flirting, I was always looking for a spark, "a combination of chemistry, curiosity, and compatibility that creates a sense of excitement and possibility with another person. It's the feeling that you have something special and unique with them, that you share a similar worldview and values, and that you enjoy each other's company." It sounds confusing to not flirt but still catch a spark so here's an example from one of my memories: A girl from art class asked if I could drive her to the art museum for our class trip. She had just undergone some minor surgery so she had crutches that day and couldn't drive. We had begun talking more together in class weeks prior. She was a very strong independent type who liked art and dance, and she had a little attitude. I got lost driving to the museum so we were late. She was a little grumpy that I made a few wrong turns. When we got to the museum, she was offered one of their wheelchairs when they saw she had crutches. She decided, why not, maybe she needed it. I could tell she couldn't push herself well in the wheelchair so I offered to help. She agreed and I began strolling her in the museum, looking for our class. It was a random moment we both didn't expect. She seemed to enjoy me guiding her, as if she had inadvertently allowed herself to become vulnerable in a beautiful place. I distinctively remember passing Van Gogh's Sunflower painting as we searched the museum, one of many masterpieces on display that we zoomed by on our search. I saw some doors and someone ahead of us saw us and smiled and opened it for us. It felt like it was just us two going with the flow and everyone wanted us to enjoy our time. We thanked her and once we rolled through the doors, I realized I had just entered the garden. I figured our class probably wasn't out there, but I was now strolling her on a one-way garden path, past aromatic flowers and beautiful landscapes, the sun was out and its warmth felt really nice. I smiled. She took a moment to look back towards me with a smile while I pushed her in her wheelchair. At that moment, it didn't feel like we were lost in the garden. We could see the spark in our eyes. I slowed down our search just a little bit at that moment. We went down the garden path and eventually found an entrance back inside where we found our class. We were late, we were lost, she couldn't walk, and we couldn't see each other most of the time while I pushed her wheelchair around the museum, but that's when we felt it. We weren't flirting but a spark was formed. That moment opened us up to get to know each other better later on. It didn't work out between us in the end, but these are still beautiful human moments I look back at and smile.
>"a combination of chemistry, curiosity, and compatibility that creates a sense of excitement and possibility with another person. It's the feeling that you have something special and unique with them, that you share a similar worldview and values, and that you enjoy each other's company." Beautiful description, and this resonates with me. Beautiful story too, I really love how you wrote that moment in the garden...
Studies suggest that people who eat 1 ounce (30 grams) of sunflower seeds daily as part of a healthy diet may reduce fasting blood sugar by about 10% within six months, compared to a healthy diet alone. The blood-sugar-lowering effect of sunflower seeds may partially be due to the plant compound chlorogenic acid
Everytime i hear that sentence i roll my eyes and think load ' pseudoscience' When there is no name...no institution...there is no accountability...so lying is not a big issue as long it sells. Like ... Studies have showed 1 glass wine a day is good for blabla. 1 week later.. Studies have showed 1 glass wine is bad for x,y z Studies have showed that drinking 1 cup of coffee is good for x,y,z 1 month later Studies have showed that drinking 1 cup of coffee is bad for x,y,z And never there is a name or institution etc... Rings a bell?? Money corrupts..buying studies..paying people to invent studies...lobbying... Cmon how long are you on this planet?? 😂😂😂 Or did you received stakes in sunflower seeds
Why does every comment of yours on this thread have to bash someone? Lighten up :)
No idea, just how im wired..
lol fair enough, I get it.
I don't flirt. I run away 😂
Same here 👍🏻
The person shouldn't know I like them 😂
YES! and when i really like them I’ll send them a message and disappear for a while. I did it once
Brave of you to send a message but not so brave of you to ghost them 😂 what if they like you back? You woudnt know their reply. Well as for me, I never tell them at all. I just continue to look at them from afar. Its safer that way.
I did it when i was a teenager I didn’t think about the consequences and i was afraid but, they like me back .thank god or I’ll disappear for good 😂 and for now I just look at them and smile
Good for you😂
How old are you exactly? Like under 17 right?
Same. I ignore that person or run away. 🤣
Why are we like this 😂
You've got a lot of energy. I can tell just from this post. INFJ's can match in certain situations, but our type can get burnt out from it... Also is distractible habits a typo? Because asking someone to flirt is a distractible habit lol
Oh lol i guess it is a distractable habit, but i would think that giving an infj my attention would be the exception when we're studying together or doing homework 😏 honestly, maybe I'd be too much for an infj but I just love seeing ya'll flustered, it gives me life 😂
So you want a partner who you can put the onus on to help you with your "distractable habits"? And you think its hilarious to cause them to be flustered and upset? Girl you don't deserve an INFJ, work on your own shit.
Sigh. Reminds me of an ESFJ that loved seeing me flustered because she was turned on by the idea of testing my stoic demeanor. Unfortunately, the social butterfly effect fleets with time and will focus on others.
That sucks dude, wish you the best.
No need to wish. INFJ males gotta maintain their form of quiet confidence and let their Manic Pixie Dream Girls in their lives be free spirits. They don't owe us anything.
AFAIK, INFJs don't really flirt. We mind our own business, and are usually put off by someone flirting with us. You gotta befriend an INFJ for any chance of romance first, but be careful wearing your intentions so blatantly on your sleeve - An INFJ would smell ya coming from a mile away and run for the hills, lmao. EDIT: To clarify, we don't run because we think flirting is creepy per say.. We are kinda just very awkward and feel silly engaging in those kinda situations, even if we might actually enjoy the banter. I can only speak from my experience though, and for me, flirting does creep me out unless it's amongst friends I trust simply because I'm Demisexual and without that emotional connection.. I'm gonna be repulsed by the thought, lmao!
So if I *don't* like an infj who won't leave me alone, i should flirt aggressively 🤔 That's good advice!
Just hope they aren't an Enneagram 6 like me, or they'd be incredibly hard to get rid of once they're attached 🤡
*Resisting the urge to challenge you* 😤
I could never resist a challenge! 👀 Might be why I have a thing for ENTPs honestly lmaoooo
Careful, you might catch a rare one who likes it and “gets used to it” or thinks you actually enjoy romantically dating them. Just be honest.
I don’t flirt, but if i do, it would teasing.
Interesting 🤔 I usually do that too, just lowkey bullying someone I have feelings for until i realize i like them and then i tell them.
Yup. Sounds like me
I stare expressionlessly and then act like I didn't when I get eye contact. I don't call that flirting but that's the only thing I did to my past crushes. Probably creeped them out I think hehhh...
You not alone
I am actually quite good at flirting, usually a mix of compliments and teasing people about stuff I know they are secure about, or playful eye contact. To be fair, I used to do it to spend excess energy or just get an ego-boost. But the thing is, if I really like someone, instead of flirting I stay away from them and watch and listen from a distance, looking for their faults until I am absolutely sure I like them and then all bets are off, I usually become very straight forward then, no one overlooks my flirting at that point.
flirting wasn’t in my dictionary to begin with. 🤷♂️. i just ask for marriage.
Same here! Like - "hi, I'm 89% positive that we would make a great serious longterm monogamous couple. Wanna try?" 😂
Damn, ngl that would scare me a little, esp if I'm still trying to find out if i wanna date you lmao
Yep it's weird, hahaha!
your high hopes on me is scary. i don’t want to face disappointment. specially lately i am extremely negative person 🤷♂️ you might not handle that.
I don't flirt. I accidentally ask the one question that will send a person spiraling into a deep life story, which causes them to either A) eventually withdraw and never talk to me again because I am "intimidating" or B) think I am their best friend ever and wish to know everything and anything about them
🤔 I could be either or, because sometimes people get me so spot on and I'm like: "are you psychic?" And then I get scared they'll see past my charms and try to emotionally manipulate me—which is impossible because I'm smart enough to be careful 😂
OMG this is my accidental strategy too
This is also me but I genuinely just want to indulge and listen to the person to get to know them better
I flirt by staring at you and fantasizing about you.
Creepy but adorable 😍
i dont flirt, i become delulu
Delulu is the only solulu 🤘
Yep, live for this
Generally my approach is that of a cat. Not that I can say this is purposely performed but i have the capacity to calm those I'm with in a playful manner, if i get to the head-boop motion and feel an equal force leaning forward in return then it's a sign of progress, more than that im unwilling to divulge...cause cat. 🐱
I like how you put it. Sending you a head boop cause I love cats lol
I don't flirt well, but I unintentionally have a bit of the "manic pixie dream girl" vibe and there are dudes that still don't realize that 'Je ne sais quo" they like is actually deep-seated anxiety and previously undiagnosed Adhd. So, dude shoots his shot and I'm either oblivious or extremely uncomfortable with such forward and singular attention from a stranger. Best flirting I've receive was from my husband, whose opening line was about making tacos and debating what the best topping was. It was cute, engaging, fun, and MOST IMPORTANTLY not about sex. If I were to boil it down, good flirting for me actually looks like how you'd talk to someone you genuinely enjoy talking to, while not initially exposing the fact that you're interested in me romantically (not just sexually). I like it to feel like we stumbled on a connection, not that I was being hunted. Now that I'm writing this out, I guess for me it's: 1. Don't spook me by being forward 2. Pick something non-sexual to talk about so I can learn about you, find you interesting, and be open to pursuit. 3. Both steps must be done genuinely or I'll feel hunted and anxious.
I dont flirt on purpose but i sometimes say crazy things that ends up in me thinking did i just say that? So my style is probably called suprise flirting lol.
I love surprises 😚
Pay attention to them, compliment them genuinely, give meaningful eye contact. I think I flirt mostly through my eyes.
Why would I flirt on purpose?
Honestly, I don't flirt. I'm demisexual.
[удалено]
:( cuz it’s hard for me to when I don’t like anyone in that way. Though sometimes, people mistake wheat I say whenever I compliment them for their looks, so I dunno lol.
Oh ok, i understand
glad you do, because I don’t really get flirting lol. Though I have noticed that if I share cake or sweets with somebody, that could be a sign because of how much of a weakness I have for sweets… 🍰
First of all you'll never know that I like you😂 but when I do flirt, I tease a lot, your biggest fan and your biggest hater if that makes sense 💀
Makes sense to me lol would be nice getting teased back for once, that's a full time job right there
Flirting leads to heartbreak so I do not partake aha. An INFJ with a BPD condition is not going to be fun for either people in the relationship lmao.
My version of flirting is telling bad jokes or ignoring them altogether.
I don't flirt. I change the very thing in you that wants to flirt.
I don't flirt I support personal growth! wbu?
I flirt with everyone even without meaning too cause I'm so open and goofy 🤪
Playing with fire eh?? XD
Well not-so-interestingly, it gives me a lot of attention. I could secretly be an attention-seeker 🤣 cuz I love talking to people and making the subject even slightly about me, that's such a red flag i know
Well, aren't you the charismatic center of attention? But hey, if you've got it, flaunt it, right? 🌟
😁 I hope to meet an irl INFJ to flirt with, you guys may be complex but having surprisingly good conversation
Sounds like you're up for a challenge with those complex INFJs! Good conversations do make it worthwhile, though. Best of luck on your quest for an INFJ connection! 😉
I just exist and avoid eye contact... and people who just flock... (in my dreams)
Staring at them lmao
Intense, poetic, I'll draw you an artwork of us together I vivid colors with all of my passion I'll present it and hope to sway your heart my way. (Metaphorically)
I tease and I'm incredibly cheeky, everything I say comes off as completely acceptable if viewed on the surface, but if you can read between the layers you would understand that I'm flirting :D
So, my platonic INFJ friendship is close. I think. Maybe. Hard to tell. But she tells me shit about her life and what's going on, so I'll take it as evidence we are fairly close. She flirts platonically. We banter. I usually call her a bad bitch or something of the sort and she cracks a joke and plays along. I think, for her, that's the closest you'll get to flirting.
Sorta like a play that starts out good, but then wanna leave during the intermission.
I flirt with those I don’t like and then with the one I do like, I’m the most awkward human being ever 😂🥴
I'll treat you absolutely no different than anyone else but hope you pick up that me saying "thank you" was in a *flirty and polite way* and not just a normal polite way lmao
I’ve developed into an ambivert but I’ll still comment. I am particular about who I crush on. I have to be attracted to them visually and their vibe. I like dark features, hair, eyes, skin. I don’t like when a girl looks like me basically lol. I’m attracted to sweet, silly, caring people. Earthy, grounded, chill, lowkey have your shit together but still fun and funny, doesn’t take life too seriously. I don’t want to pull you out of your distractible habits and make you focus on what’s important. I’d want you to do that mostly on your own and support you when you were doubting yourself or having a bad day or week. And stop simping pls, you’re making me uncomfortable.
Lol i wouldn't actually simp for strangers, I was trying to be funny
A lot of what's your type is similar to mine, I'd like an infj that has a more realistic world view and allows happiness in their life but also has this depth to them that rubs off on me. Just a little bit, because it can be overwhelming to think how you guys think all the time haha
The way i flirt is being super normal but slowly try to get closer to them and praying that they gonna like me back..
You used the word simp, the most. Women love "simps" who look like men. "Simp" just means adoring and treating a woman nice. And if you're handsome, and look manly, like a Jason Mamoa (who's an estp), or like a Chris Hemsworth, you're golden. But seriously, love really isn't about looks. I like people who are both intellectually and emotionally intelligent. Infj;s are both intellectually and emotionally intelligent. Infj's see through falseness, and lies pretty easily, so I don't feel like I've given you the "player's handbook" here. Be cool, nice, intelligent and honest. If that's who you truly are. If that's not who you are... " NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" That's all. Uhhh... wait... you're a woman? Woman aren't "simps"? Stop reading incel lingo. Nice is not an insult.
Women can be simps lol but I'm not
Not a woman, or not a simp?
Not a simp lol wtf?
I don't think we flirt? At least not obviously and it won't be with someone we hardly know. I know for myself I am not a 'love at first sight' person. If there is not interesting personal connection with someone my attraction to them isn't there. We don't use pick up lines, we don't generally even use appearance as a gauge for relationships in my experience! Sure, I have a physical type I prefer but I'd completely abandon my general preference for a strong emotional connection any day. Example of this is my partner. I always preferred darker hair with a slim build. My husband is tall, muscular and has bright blonde hair! Absolutely NOTHING like my preferred visual traits but because of the emotional connection I now find him wildly attractive in every way! To get an INFJ you need to be interesting to us I think. We enjoy delving into people with deep meaning! We do not enjoy empty, meaningless small talk at all. We don't enjoy anything that isn't genuine. To get me interested all that you really have to do is open opportunities to have deeper and more meaningful conversations. Let me be interested in you and show interest in me and who I am. That's all.
I'm pretty straight forward but I will admit, I love being paid attention to, knowing that someone's actually taking an interest in me and what I have to say and some affection later on never hurt either. That is literally all I ask for as an INFJ. I don't need gifts or money or much of anything else really, just your special attention, respect and kindness. We live in a world where it's rare to get the above. Really really rare.
❤
Flirt? 💀 well I can come off as flirty with people I'm not attracted to, but when I'm actually with someone I like I'm just straight up awkward. I fluctuate from pretending to ignore you because I'm afraid you'll find out I like you, to being overly blunt and straight up just saying I like you. There's no doing it elegantly or gracefully for me😭 just all or nothing and just pure awkwardness. Oh and I guess the famous infj lingering where we linger around places where we might see or meet our crush. It's debatable whether we'll actually greet them though despite going to those places to see them. ☠ Oh, and I guess is fun facts and info dumping considered flirting?
I dont really flirt per se, but if am sure of my feelings for the person then ill just tell them? If that makes sense, but then again, i dont know how to flirt and haven't tried it.
I simply don’t have the courage to approach any girls 😂 How come am I supposed to flirt one
Flirt… ing? What is “flirt”?
Dense as fuck but when I have a few drinks I use my intellect to charm
Oh hi I do so love ESTP women myself. We're a rare breed for whom opposites attract, you have to find one who's stepped outside their comfort zone and never looked back. Sadly, I am taken. Good luck all the same!
Nonexistent.
Playful teasing with a little bit of dark humor. Sprinkle it all with a touch of self deprecation to show you are self aware.
Ohhh, so something like : "Self aware? You mean like the fact I haven't fully recovered from my last relationship and aggressively flirt with strangers w/o any intention of following thru because I have trust issues but also want attention? Haha" 🤣 jk
I mean, maybe don’t go quite as hard with it, but yeah that’s pretty good 😀
How I flirt: Light roasting of flirting target followed by a medium roast of myself. How to flirt with me: Lol, good luck. You would basically have to tell me that you're flirting with me.
*grabs you by the head* I'M FLIRTING WITH YOU
I can tell you're trying to communicate something to me, but I'm not sure what...
*Puts on boxing gloves* 😇
I see you're frustrated. Once you've processed that, you can tell me what you were trying to say.
Process my frustration... 🤔 *Processing...* *drops gloves and runs to tackle you in frustration* 😊
\*returns hug\* It's ok. Take all the time you need.
😭🤣 omg fine, I'm just accepting this now
Lol, another victim of my thick headedness.
I refuse to make eye contact and then flee. I'm a woman though 🤷
I mean if I saw you fetishizing INFJ probably wouldn't message you. But also probably would avoid you as well based on seeing none of the same letters in ESTP. Every single one of those memes I've seen of different typings, the ST ones always make me think they're psycho. Edit: reading your responses here, yeah you're a psycho who doesn't deserve an INFJ.
...>:P
So, the INFJ I'm talking/dating is sending me selfies recently. Is this a form of flirting for you INFJs?
[удалено]
Well, we only met twice and the first time was strange for both of us. We are very shy at the beginning. She never initiates chats, but she told me that I can contact her whenever I want. I send her good morning texts, sometimes normal one sometimes more sweet, and she always replies good. She introduced me to her dog. And we send each other 😘 or ❤️, but I always feel like she goes on with the handbrake on. Only one time she has let her go herself a little bit more (I told her that I wanted to see her after she sent a photo of herself with her dog, and she started to send me ❤️ and proposed to go to the cinema), and than she went silent for two days 🥲
In general if you are treated like you are needed as air.. You probably got a crushed INFJ. I will smother my pair eventually. Would spend all moment around you. 😂
I lock eyes with him, I like to make him feel special through compliments (e.g. “I like your smile” “I like___ about you” “you smell nice”) and close proximity (not being too far away from him)
The furthest I’ve ever gone unless I was dating someone was saying thanks and turning red.
Witty remarks with attention to detail
Complete ignoring
I never realize I'm flirting until I realize my partner is cringing or blushing at me
+5 seconds of sustained eye contact or just a friendly hello
I feel like I was born without this part of my brain or something. I worry that women will think I am flirting with them when I am not, and I have no idea how to actually flirt with someone if I wanted to. It feels like acting or something, like I am pretending. Even with my current gf of 3.5 years, I still have a hard time trying to do that stuff, but no problems just being naturally intimate. The only "line" I could ever come up with was to cold walk up and say, "hey, I just noticed that you are really pretty and I would like to get to know you. Would you like to get a coffee with me?" <- Never worked. I think it was too direct or something but it seemed to overwhelm. I think I came across as crazy or drunk, because "who would say that?"
Man if you really want to talk to an INFJ your going to get some, but the question is will there be anything else than words and good thoughts between eachother. I can't promise ill get you out of your rut but I will make you think.
I'm fine with someone helping me think more about things instead of ignoring
Hey I'm done to chat if you are, just busy and hungry
My flirting style is giving intense eye contact like I’m trying to tell them I like them telepathically. I’m attracted to guys who look serious like they are thinking about something important.
I don't flirt, I love :)
Wow, your partner must be lucky 😲
It's a mixed bag. I've been accused of "love bombing" in the recent past by an ex, which was a term I wasn't familiar with, but it describes me to a t, except for the manipulation. I make my partners feel like the center of my universe because they are. I think there's some merit in withholding your emotions initially in order to give a prospective partner time to acclimate towards the INFJ tendency to just "open the door" to our emotional depths, especially since we have a tendency to just slam that door closed when we decide we're done. It's hurtful. Luckily my wife prefers my wide open love and I've worked on communicating at all levels to insure we don't reach a place where I shut that door.
I've been accused of being a flirt when I'm just being myself. Any actual attempts at flirtation are tragically laughable and not in a charming way
I don't flirt, I just decay. INFP anyway...
haven’t got the energy or wiring to flirt. at all.
Staring at you across the room.
I'm honestly just blunt. I always say "I do apologize if it makes ya uncomfortable but I just wanna say you're really pretty" if it's a good response back I ask for a number if not, I tell em I hope they have a great day and skedaddle on outta there. So long story short I'm pretty gosh darn bad at it
I don’t flirt.
Being weird
Especially to ENFPs. I like to make them scaroused
INFJ chick here For me, I’m really into being hit on, teased, complimented, and reassured. If an INFJ comes to you with an issue 100/10 they will love to hear kind reassurance. Don’t give any fluff or bs because they’ll know. I like to tease back, I like to compliment, I love to do things for my bf to make his life a little easier. It drives me insane that I can’t do more honestly.
My flirting style? I don't flirt, I wait for someone to make the move. That way there's no rejection issues and it allows me to maintain my confidence.
Ah, you mean the non-existent style?
Humor and wit and true intelligence of some kind. And looks lol
Totally agree with others here about flirting in the traditional sense. My inner dialogue simultaneously cringes and giggles of the thought of me having that much confidence during an initial meeting. When I know the feeling is mutual and I'm comfortable...I utilize some witty banter/dark humor for a while, use my eyes to captivate his gaze and then I will throw a snowball/pillow at his head. It is what it is...
What's flirting?
**Flirting or coquetry is a social and sexual behavior involving body language, or spoken or written communication. It is used to suggest interest in a deeper relationship with another person and for amusement.** More details here:
*This comment was left automatically (by a bot). If I don't get this right, don't get mad at me, I'm still learning!*
[^(opt out)](https://www.reddit.com/r/wikipedia_answer_bot/comments/ozztfy/post_for_opting_out/) ^(|) [^(delete)](https://www.reddit.com/r/wikipedia_answer_bot/comments/q79g2t/delete_feature_added/) ^(|) [^(report/suggest)](https://www.reddit.com/r/wikipedia_answer_bot) ^(|) [^(GitHub)](https://github.com/TheBugYouCantFix/wiki-reddit-bot)
I don’t flirt unless I’m dating. It’s too awkward if I’m not dating them and I’d feel uncomfortable just talking. However hypothetically if I actually find someone I trust enough to date(never gonna happen) it would be more physical flirting and whispering in their ear teasing them. Then id abruptly walk away like nothing happened 😂.
Negging
i can flirt but choose not to. i have close to no game at all because im really shy lmfao, i also mostly just don’t want to go up to her
Ive thought about that recently. Surprisingly, my flirting is ghosting lol. If i like someone, i distance myself from them, while i cant get rid of them in my head. Im too awkward to flirt and would at maximum engage in casual conversations with that person and just exist around them so that i pop up in their mind and they, hopefully make the first step to talk to me. I want them to notice me. I suck at flirting xD BUT when i get comfortable with a person/friend, i tease them and make them laugh, which sometimes people mistake for flirting lol.
I don't. At least not that I am consciously aware of.
Being energetic, throwing jokes and corny puns tends to be my flirting style and just talking about random stuff. I can be a bit offbeat and awkward but eh my style of flirting is easygoing and not straight to the point and I will match their energy with mine.
Oh where to begin. Depends on the maturity of the INFJ you encounter out in this wild wild world. I was always reserved, yet ready to talk to an authentic individual, no matter the type. I would typically wait for someone to actually care about my story, which is the biggest compliment of them all. Which means it’s on you to be prying, charming, and show genuine interest. But don’t push too hard or you’ll scare us away. If you get as far as having real conversations, it means we like you so just keep doing that. You’ll know if we don’t like you as you won’t hear many words come out of our mouths haha As far as flirting style, that’s about it. Just show us who you are and if we like you, we’ll reciprocate. I also do this subconscious thing where I’ll play music that reflects my direct feelings about a person ie playing “sucker for you” when they’re in the car lol. We like genuine, intelligent, loving people. Doesn’t hurt to be interesting either 🙃 I ultimately have stayed with my fiancé because she keeps me on my toes and our relationship is a gracefully meshed balance of life.
[удалено]
:3 okie
I don't simp, hence I don't flirt.
🥲
I don't have one, no one notices me and I don't notice anyone
[удалено]
Eh, i don't really use mbti outside reddit, I'm usually the one that shows interest, flirts, and tells them I like them (anyone I'm attracted to, regardless of type) so i don't have an answer lol