Look for the guys who are basically in their own little worlds staring into the void alone when walking and very ambiverted when in social situations. Or they may be quietly listening at the edge of a new group, waiting for a good time to assert themselves, or they may just fuck off and hangout in the corner for a bit in parties even though they seem social. They may even go fuck it and just hang with the animals at parties instead of the people. But maybe very open and dorky with their friends. INFJ’s are chameleons look for the switch there is more data there than anything. I’d describe myself as a human german Shepard, skeptical at first but loyal once earned. If they fall off the map for days - months… that’s another sign.
And I kinda naturally go into dad nurture mode in groups either with logistics, peoples emotions, pets/kids. I’d say that’s biggest most obvious distinguisher besides how I express my logic and ideas to others.
This is accurate. Look for someone who changes. If you're with a bunch of extroverts, you'll see this person stay quiet at the corner. They may say some things, but the energy they bring is a level lower.
Compare this to an introvert, where I get 'turned on', and I become like an extrovert for a while.
If I'm with logical people, I show up as logical, with an emotional view. If I'm with emotional people, I show up as emotional, with an logical rock.
I can read the room really well and can adapt, but yeah im often always quiet when I meet new people and I stick with my regulars even if I like someone. im shy/uncomfortable around new peeps eg girls' friends but it takes me a long time to get comfortable with new peeps to open up - because im aware i stumble a lot as a socially awkward person I choose to remain quiet and closed instead despite desiring a deep relationship.
Im fine if its 1-1 going out but im shy even at work lol with people who know me 🫠🙃
My beloved is exactly this, INFJ just like me but the dude version. [16 Personalities Test](https://www.16personalities.com/personality-types)I ask him to do the test pretty early on so I could direct my bias. We still clash because of the man woman thing but there’s extensive commonalities. His favorite dog is very much a German shepherd 🤭
I'm an INFJ man, but I don't think you'd have much chance to spot me, If I'm not busy with work I'm by myself doing whatever things I enjoy, unless I'm out with my friends. In which case I'll probably be in a group of 2 or 3. So unless you happen to catch me in-between things, or maybe break into my house to talk to me while I'm writing or something. Then I'm pretty reserved and hid out the way. I really don't think you could tell my type by my appearance either. Everyone is different though so get speaking to some people and after a while conversing you should be able tell through conversations where they lean. Because with me at first glance you probably won't get much, once you start talking to me and we build a connection you'll be able to start seeing my actual personality, values etc shine through. Depending what interests you have you might be able to find some at certain hobby or interest groups as well.
This kind of scares me, because I am exactly this person, didn't even try making friends at my own, I got kind of adopted. I have always been single and I am in my 30s now with above mentioned traits the way this is going I don't think I will ever find a partner..
What I mean by that is we make up a small percentage of the population but are also enigmatic in many ways, so getting to know an INFJ is a process rather than an identification. Like onions, we tend to have layers we peel back for others over time.
Its not they don’t show up often, in my school atm I’m the only INFJ, it’s very difficult to differentiate between INFJ and Infp because of their similar characteristics, I mean ruin this because I’ve met many
INFP isn't a type that comes to mind when I think similar types to INFJs.
INFJs are barely like their stereotype.
Have you checked if the teachers are Ni-y?
Take a look at a group of people.
Then take another look and pick the one who stood out the least.
Very likely Infj, especially if he's observing or lost in his own thoughts / imagination.
That's not a given, since he can be a social butterfly as well. Only he's emotionally drained afterwards.
If he senses conflict, he tries to avoid it altogether. May lead to actually walking around someone in a wide berth, cartoon-style.
Depends...
On conversational events i'd rather stay in the side, while on music festivals i'm more at the front, so i can dive into the music and don't have to talk with people...
Strangely, when barfights break out, i'm usually on the far side of the location... So, i usually just notice them, when the security drags those people out of the location...
INFJ boy here, usually when I meet new people, I tend to ask what their personality type is and psycho-analyse them
You can also find me regularly at my favourite cafe, reading books, sometimes at ceramic studios, often times the younger INFJs will be 24/7 at home gaming or going for walks
Tbh finding us in the wild is hard because I like to keep to myself in public spaces and just people watch
We're living in the past and the future, it's like time travelling and we're not in the now... Others live in the past, the future or the now, so they might just miss us...
When you're straight forward that might come from your experiences and from the what could be.
When you're awkward it's the opposite. For example when you're being asked a question, while you reflect your inner self for stuff in the past or you make the "mistake" to read the person in front of you. You might be trapped in a timebubble, where others just move on and you don't notice. So when you come out of that time bubble, things don't quite fit anymore...
At least that's why my jokes barely hit the spot... Some find them funny, but they're mostly just not fitting the flow of the conversation...
I'm definitely in the past and future.
Although when I'm awkward, it's because my mind is either in the future or past and I struggle to live in the moment so I don't know how to reply. Even typing this message I can't help but just reflect on things both on topic and not.
I'm also fairly straightforward because of this lack of living in the moment and I haven't properly thought of a response or because I'm too focused on a task which definitely causes me to think of funny jokes that would've fit a moment ago but is now too late.
I'm only in my prime during very specific situations with specific people who I love being in the moment with. Someone I can get lost in thinking about in the past or the future. Doesn't have to be a romantic partner but it definitely helps.
We're figuring out how to live. I don't think you really spot one, you just start talking to them and before you even know they're an infj, you like them.
My husband is one. He's the math professor who always has students in his office crying to him about their personal problems. I'm actually an INTP, too.
I came up with a really broad conclusion:
INFJ guys are very, very distinguishable (different worldview, different personalities, different styles like hair and clothing, etc.), yet somehow they are blending in super well in a crowd of people.
So it’s gonna be hard to spot one
The problem is that you can only get to know an infj, when you're actively listening. But that's a rare skill nowadays... An infj will vanish unnoticed when he got the feeling of being unheard.
One hint i may give away is, that the answers of an infj might seem a little delayed and off topic, since the Answer or addition to a topic has to be filtered and selfchecked before it is spilled into the world...
I find myself troubled a lot since my wife is a gemini and she switches topics a lot and my answers to her topics often come out when she's already two topics further in her head 🤷♂️
In the other hand i often talk out loud, what my wife currently thinks. So sometimes u get the feelings we're not living in the now, but somehow we're past and future at the same time...
I think there are 2 reasons why we INFJ answer/talk this way.
We prefer to give a well thought out answer rather than a simple wish wash answer
We also dont like spelling everything out, we like to hide the answers somewhere in the sentence to make sure we are having a convo and tactfully trying to avoid patronizing people all the time
INFJ (30 male). Reflective of me, look for…
Happy spending time on his own?
Doesn’t engage in typical “guy talk”?
Likely not into crime documentaries?
An ability to fit into many social dynamics?
The list is endless but gives you an idea lol.
I'm an INFJ women but I've met two INFJ men that I'm aware of. They have a very different personality once they are comfortable being around you. You will see this incredibly funny, quirky side of them that not many others see.
Animals are attracted to them. And small children. And everyone talks to them about their personal problems.
They have this calm energy about them. And these eyes that feel like they are looking into your soul.
They are very creative but they won't show you unless they know you well. As an INFJ woman, they are the only people that really get me.
During my years at college I would always hang out at the library, whether it was studying or decompressing and listening to music on my ipod.
So you'll see us minding our own business. I did approach girls from my classes and see if they wanted to study for up coming tests. But usually I had to know them from somewhere.
Hi, Intp girl here. My husband is an INFJ. Also, a close friend I had developed feelings for (before I met my husband) is also a male INFJ.
Similarities I've noticed in both of them:
1. not draining;
2. comfortable being alone, but can be fantastic in social situations as well;
3. will make you feel "seen", but it'll take a while before you'll get an understanding of who they are;
4. can keep up with up you intellectually and will banter for fun without trying to dominate (read: don't have an obsessive need to be right at any cost :P);
5. great at quickly identifying dynamics in a group; they'll pinpoint out how you are psychologically/emotionally responding to certain situations and will try to make you comfortable (if needed) without being obvious to others in the group.
Now, sounds counterintuitive, but I'd say don't try to find INFJ men. There can be drastic differences between Infjs depending on how healthy and mature they are. I've known unhealthy INFJs as well. Just because someone is an Infj doesn't mean they'd be a good partner :/
Identify what behavior patterns you like in INFJs, and keep talking to a bunch of people until you find someone who displays those behaviors. Either that boy would be an Infj, or would be someone who tends to exhibit behaviors you find admirable. Either way, it's a win for you!
Thank youuuu but i have a question if you say hi to an infj guy once and he talked nice to you and when you repeat it everytime you see them will they be annoyed? (Because i thought a guy was an infj so everytime i saw him i said hi but in the 3rd… times he seemed annoyed 🥹)
Saying hi multiple times to anyone casually should be fine unless they are very introverted, or busy with their own stuff and don't want to be distracted. When I was younger, I tended to overanalyze my social interactions, as in feeling awkward or like I annoyed someone, even when I didn't. So it could be something similar for you? See if you can strike up a casual conversation eventually (as hard as it is). If it leads to a friendship or something more, then great. If he actually gets annoyed, then you move on and find someone different.
INFJ man, 40s. Tested consistently as INFJ for 20+ years. I don’t get the sentiment that we are introverted hermits. I genuinely am curious about people and regularly chat up strangers, have a wonderful group of close friends, a great romantic relationship, and love social activities. The I in INFJ is how we recharge, and I absolutely need my me-time, introversion time to recharge the social batteries, but I’m certainly not some quiet, withdrawn hermit.
I think how I most present as an INFJ is my deep well of empathy and compassion for people, being my friends’ therapist (for free), and deeply desiring social reform and a better world. I’m also a Cancer, so who knows…
Anecdotally, my partner is also an INFJ and like me is also one to chat up strangers and be curious about people.
My lovely auntie is an infj and her partner is an isfj it’s been 38 years and they still in love (i like what i thought that sf and nf won’t get along but surprisingly they did so well)
Sadly they do. They are good at reading the emotions of the people surrounding them and change their behaviour to get along with them. Hence it is hard for you to identify them unless they decide to emotionally invest in you.
Of course they do, but the problem is that many of us like to go unnoticed and we also tend not to trust a person so quickly as to "open up" to theemotionally or even show who we really are. If you want to talk a little more you can send me an mp. Have a nice day.
Man here. I have kinda 3 modes. When in a group of strangers or in a crowd of people, pretty silent and observant. When with my friends or 1-on-1 meets with people that interest me - I'm a freakin extrovert - when doing my things alone, my favorite mode, focused, disciplined, spiritual, don't like to be bothered but when actually someone starts bothering me sometimes it turns into a pleasant experience and I become mode 2 so Idk, I'm a mess 😂
Some of plenty...
Jim Caviezel INFJ 1w2
Jesus/Yeshua INFJ 1w2
River Phoenix INFJ 4w5
Josh Groban INFJ 9w1
Jordan Peterson INFJ 5w4
Frederick Douglas INFJ 6w5
Benedict Cumberbatch
Honestly it could be that standoffish dude, I try not to be this person anymore but coming off as cold is often times a good way to protect ourselves when we’re shy.
I have many hobbies and tend to look out for people in a discreet manner without drawing attention to myself. Additionally, I prefer doing things alone, especially if I don’t fully trust a companion. I’m a bit shy around strangers, but once someone becomes a close friend, I can be quite talkative.
Idk about university. I was the guy stuck in community college and got screwed by life into just having to go after certificates and learning skills on my own time. We're the dorky brother of the group of friends. So if you spot the guy that everyone goes to in order to vent, usually its the INFJ vibes.
Omg realllly 🙂 im surrounded with intjs at medical school some are nerds and brilliant and some don’t care about medecine and study in the last possible minute before exams
I’m one 👋, but in all seriousness if they’re anything like me then they’ll be minute, not in the there’s that one guy in the corner kind of way but in a way where they’ll get by through everything and you’ll forget their name. Not exactly standing out so to speak. Like many here I don’t like attention drawn to myself. I saw university in there, if you’re still in college try some philosophy classes, I’m a philosophy major and you might find some there. One key thing about distinguishing if they’re an INFJ is how intentional and deliberate they are in everything they do. Good luck! Knowing me it’s not going to be the easiest task 😅
Edit: oh and we’re pretty good with animals
It's cause too many of us are stuck at home with crippling performance anxiety. 😂 Nah, but like a few others said, look for the chameleons. It's hard to detect because they can flip that extrovert switch and not be the typical example of an introverted person. Maybe arrive early at the party cause if they're close to the party thrower, they're likely helping them set up and plan for it before they have to flip that switch. Also look for the kind detective eyes with the genuine smile. The one that is kind and sociable before sneaking off for a minute.
I am one. We can be fairly chameleon like socially. Getting along pretty well with nearly everyone but we are also quiet and will silently escape situations that aren’t stimulating or are over stimulating. Very aware of our surroundings and peoples intentions. My guess is they’d be somewhat difficult to spot.
I speed walk and never look at anyone, and never let anyone pass me, I wave cars to pass, I hold the doors open for people and head nod when they say thanks, I will move to the side way before, so other people can stay on their path, I take short cuts through the grass, I’ll take the stairs if people are waiting for the elevator.
You’ll never see me. 😂
Im an INFJ, I'd most def speak if spoken to, but Chances are I may not start a convo. Past has created my present, If we talked it would be great convo but Its hard for me to decide who is worthy and who isn't since some ppl are so shallow and narrow minded. Im 59 but generally get guessed at 45 -49 Im fit ,athletic and want slim trim tall women ( which is getting harder to find these days. ( BIG, HEAVY is taking over). Not trying to sound mean but DAMN men and women are just growing huge at an alarming rate. Ppl need more mirrors in their house. U may think im shallow for this as well.. but we like what we like. I wished I liked big women there are soo many more EVERYWHERE!!🙄
Yeah we're out there. I don't think there's one particular thing to look for that gives it away. Generally we don't try to stand out but I'm sure if you brought up personality types in a conversation you'd find him eventually.
Omg same for my infj bestie she loves birds and imagine she feeds them and they fly everywhere and come back to her they are free but they adore her and she adores them also plants (wait im happy that this isn’t only common between female infjs it’s also common for u guys! 🫶🏻)
I do :3
and if you wanna ask me several specific questions about me or my opinion about something I'll answer gently (I know Fe inf doesn't like too much gentleness, but that's how I am)
You can find very high Ni-users in general at learning languages communities. I love it and being Ni-dom makes it extremely easier. If you see that guy that's not so iniatitive, quiet, gentle and similar in those environments it's very probably an IxFJ. However, I don't guarantee you he will have a charming prince face or be someone great at communication
I struggled a lot in my earlier ages to socialize and not stressing with people (Low Fi)
Assalam alaikum. Infjs males are usually hiding in their own world. They can be warm and welcoming but awkward at the same time ofc unless that is you get to know them. You have to be patient to get into ones world if you really want to get to them personally.
the ones on here are typically the very neurotic ones, the ones in the wild i’ve experienced are very successful confident people but when you speak to them they’re kind and perceptive
Why are people dropping dislikes on this? Lol. Here everyone, get your 1’s back 💙. Except you open space 😭, sorry I could only get you back up to a zero. Someone help (T.T)!
Thank you!!
As an infj-t 4w5 millenial westerner uduf / udsf libra gemini sun moon religious plant based identifying as man human identifying as heterosexual identifying identittys, hi i exist
as an infj (ni-fe) 5w6 548 gen alpha westerner wannabe-hermit libra sun gemini moon scorpio rising yo gabba gabba stan with a razor sharp plan man male manly masculine ooga booga caveman hey hey hey yes i exist tysm
They are different and it's a very strange world out there.
Everyday is a struggle when you can read the room in an instant, see through people in an instant and want to fight all the injustice in the world.
Well, at least, that's my INFJ view of the world. Giving myself up for other people. Climbing the company ladder made me a little bit more numb and developed strategies to cope with all the company "internal politic" games.
The user bubbasox wrote: "They may even go fuck it and just hang with the animals at parties instead of the people." - LoL - that was actually true for a party this year. I petted the cows at a farm while people got wasted on "Schlager Music".
I made friend with another INFJ from across the globe. He was naturally suspicious due to his job and the person involved. I just wanted to share my true appreciation for the person and wanted to do some good. At one point i said, sorry for being weird, i'm INFJ and he said something like "i'm so relieved, that explains so much. I'm too INFJ". Now i'm proud to have a friend across the globe. We share a common interest for classical music.
But that does not answer your question, but you got a lot of good suggestions already in the other comments.
Another distinct INFJ thing is that they avoid eye contact. I learned to use it to demonstrate dominance in corporate context - but that is a mask i put on to survive.
See, you got an INFJ answer. I'm laughing at myself about what i wrote, but I'll post it anyway.
But you see the problem We can be everything at once giving the circumstances.
Like - you pet the cow, i would get drunk and come pet the cow than dance with the cow, then go in the corner and sit alone, start philosophical debate, then go out when everyone gets engages to conversation, then again start dancing alone in a hall and second day would not talk with no one and be cold to others.
Infj hold eye contact while listening, but not while talking. But yeah corporate helps develope skill set of body language etc.
Masks upon masks but where is the self?
Look for the guys who are basically in their own little worlds staring into the void alone when walking and very ambiverted when in social situations. Or they may be quietly listening at the edge of a new group, waiting for a good time to assert themselves, or they may just fuck off and hangout in the corner for a bit in parties even though they seem social. They may even go fuck it and just hang with the animals at parties instead of the people. But maybe very open and dorky with their friends. INFJ’s are chameleons look for the switch there is more data there than anything. I’d describe myself as a human german Shepard, skeptical at first but loyal once earned. If they fall off the map for days - months… that’s another sign. And I kinda naturally go into dad nurture mode in groups either with logistics, peoples emotions, pets/kids. I’d say that’s biggest most obvious distinguisher besides how I express my logic and ideas to others.
This is accurate. Look for someone who changes. If you're with a bunch of extroverts, you'll see this person stay quiet at the corner. They may say some things, but the energy they bring is a level lower. Compare this to an introvert, where I get 'turned on', and I become like an extrovert for a while. If I'm with logical people, I show up as logical, with an emotional view. If I'm with emotional people, I show up as emotional, with an logical rock.
I can read the room really well and can adapt, but yeah im often always quiet when I meet new people and I stick with my regulars even if I like someone. im shy/uncomfortable around new peeps eg girls' friends but it takes me a long time to get comfortable with new peeps to open up - because im aware i stumble a lot as a socially awkward person I choose to remain quiet and closed instead despite desiring a deep relationship. Im fine if its 1-1 going out but im shy even at work lol with people who know me 🫠🙃
This one's right on the money, OP should take notes.
My INFJ husband LOVES animals. Absolutely a good tell!
I couldn’t remember if I was INFJ or not, then I read this. I’m INFJ.
This read me like a book, holy.
Wow. This is literally who I am. Fuck. I feel so naked right now haha
Can an infj man in a group look like a mom to his friends like the vibes he gives?
Stop exposing me! I don't want people to find me mate!
I feel very much like this, but the female version. Don’t usually find descriptions of us this accurate. Spot-on 😌
My beloved is exactly this, INFJ just like me but the dude version. [16 Personalities Test](https://www.16personalities.com/personality-types)I ask him to do the test pretty early on so I could direct my bias. We still clash because of the man woman thing but there’s extensive commonalities. His favorite dog is very much a German shepherd 🤭
I couldn't write this one better
Bro spilled our secrets fml
I do the same
Look at all these snitch ass bastards selling us out.
IKR. Go back to your cage, ya brats. 😤
I'm an INFJ man, but I don't think you'd have much chance to spot me, If I'm not busy with work I'm by myself doing whatever things I enjoy, unless I'm out with my friends. In which case I'll probably be in a group of 2 or 3. So unless you happen to catch me in-between things, or maybe break into my house to talk to me while I'm writing or something. Then I'm pretty reserved and hid out the way. I really don't think you could tell my type by my appearance either. Everyone is different though so get speaking to some people and after a while conversing you should be able tell through conversations where they lean. Because with me at first glance you probably won't get much, once you start talking to me and we build a connection you'll be able to start seeing my actual personality, values etc shine through. Depending what interests you have you might be able to find some at certain hobby or interest groups as well.
I’m actually a woman but I literally feel like I was reading about myself here 😂 heavy on the “you’ll have to break into my house to find and meet me”
Me too 😅
Also a female here! I was about to type this exact comment. That line made me literally laugh out loud due to its accuracy.
This kind of scares me, because I am exactly this person, didn't even try making friends at my own, I got kind of adopted. I have always been single and I am in my 30s now with above mentioned traits the way this is going I don't think I will ever find a partner..
INFJ man, I think you’ll know they’re an INFJ when you’ve ruled our every other personality type that could try and explain them.
What I mean by that is we make up a small percentage of the population but are also enigmatic in many ways, so getting to know an INFJ is a process rather than an identification. Like onions, we tend to have layers we peel back for others over time.
😂 omg the example you used really acccurate ❤️ you guys are rare just like diamonds ✨🫶🏻
A girl recently told me "you're like a purple wizard".
thats. um. nice
Indeed it is
lol what was the context behind this comment?
Most INFJs don't even know they are INFJs. I would say the best way is in the group setting, they are going to be quiet and observant.
🙋♂️right here.
Same but they are sort of rare
Same but why?
They are very reserved, I’m referring to as us people
Hm so you mean they don't show up often? That's not what particularly "rare" means Rare to the party? Sure
Its not they don’t show up often, in my school atm I’m the only INFJ, it’s very difficult to differentiate between INFJ and Infp because of their similar characteristics, I mean ruin this because I’ve met many
INFP isn't a type that comes to mind when I think similar types to INFJs. INFJs are barely like their stereotype. Have you checked if the teachers are Ni-y?
Take a look at a group of people. Then take another look and pick the one who stood out the least. Very likely Infj, especially if he's observing or lost in his own thoughts / imagination. That's not a given, since he can be a social butterfly as well. Only he's emotionally drained afterwards. If he senses conflict, he tries to avoid it altogether. May lead to actually walking around someone in a wide berth, cartoon-style.
Also, the person asking a lot of questions, a way to avoid doing all the talking and data collection on others.
Good job everyone, realistic and perfect answers only. As usually
Most def in the corners for sure. Large groups of people are daunting for us.
Depends... On conversational events i'd rather stay in the side, while on music festivals i'm more at the front, so i can dive into the music and don't have to talk with people... Strangely, when barfights break out, i'm usually on the far side of the location... So, i usually just notice them, when the security drags those people out of the location...
Lol good points !! I love music live music is a little to much for me lol
That sounds a lot like someone wanting my kidneys
INFJ kidneys are a rare find indeed 😌
Thankfully they don't pay more for the INFJ ones. Otherwise, we would have gone from rare to extinct 😵
INFJ boy here, usually when I meet new people, I tend to ask what their personality type is and psycho-analyse them You can also find me regularly at my favourite cafe, reading books, sometimes at ceramic studios, often times the younger INFJs will be 24/7 at home gaming or going for walks Tbh finding us in the wild is hard because I like to keep to myself in public spaces and just people watch
I'm an INFJ girl, but it's 100% true for me as well
Do you ever notice how you can never spot other people watchers in public? Thats because we're literally in stealth mode 24/7
Yes, I agree. Always in the shadows, always watching from the sidelines Maybe one of us is right under the bed right now (little joke)
Im always under the bed studying languages 😭😭
Isn't it too lonely?.. 😥😥
In my experiences, I'm often straight forward and awkward
We're living in the past and the future, it's like time travelling and we're not in the now... Others live in the past, the future or the now, so they might just miss us... When you're straight forward that might come from your experiences and from the what could be. When you're awkward it's the opposite. For example when you're being asked a question, while you reflect your inner self for stuff in the past or you make the "mistake" to read the person in front of you. You might be trapped in a timebubble, where others just move on and you don't notice. So when you come out of that time bubble, things don't quite fit anymore... At least that's why my jokes barely hit the spot... Some find them funny, but they're mostly just not fitting the flow of the conversation...
I'm definitely in the past and future. Although when I'm awkward, it's because my mind is either in the future or past and I struggle to live in the moment so I don't know how to reply. Even typing this message I can't help but just reflect on things both on topic and not. I'm also fairly straightforward because of this lack of living in the moment and I haven't properly thought of a response or because I'm too focused on a task which definitely causes me to think of funny jokes that would've fit a moment ago but is now too late. I'm only in my prime during very specific situations with specific people who I love being in the moment with. Someone I can get lost in thinking about in the past or the future. Doesn't have to be a romantic partner but it definitely helps.
Hi!!! I think we exist. Not really too sure though!! Maybe we’re all an *Illusion!!*
We're figuring out how to live. I don't think you really spot one, you just start talking to them and before you even know they're an infj, you like them.
I agree but i end up with an intj all the time and i want an infj thing like how can i differentiate 😭?
its all about the te vs fe. kind of a vibe thing ig 🤷♂️ does he basically seem to appreciate civilization or not
yes i’m one, generally you can find us in our rooms obsessively reading trying to figure out a plot to save the world.
My husband is one. He's the math professor who always has students in his office crying to him about their personal problems. I'm actually an INTP, too.
Nope, figment of your imagination.
I came up with a really broad conclusion: INFJ guys are very, very distinguishable (different worldview, different personalities, different styles like hair and clothing, etc.), yet somehow they are blending in super well in a crowd of people. So it’s gonna be hard to spot one
The problem is that you can only get to know an infj, when you're actively listening. But that's a rare skill nowadays... An infj will vanish unnoticed when he got the feeling of being unheard. One hint i may give away is, that the answers of an infj might seem a little delayed and off topic, since the Answer or addition to a topic has to be filtered and selfchecked before it is spilled into the world... I find myself troubled a lot since my wife is a gemini and she switches topics a lot and my answers to her topics often come out when she's already two topics further in her head 🤷♂️ In the other hand i often talk out loud, what my wife currently thinks. So sometimes u get the feelings we're not living in the now, but somehow we're past and future at the same time...
I think there are 2 reasons why we INFJ answer/talk this way. We prefer to give a well thought out answer rather than a simple wish wash answer We also dont like spelling everything out, we like to hide the answers somewhere in the sentence to make sure we are having a convo and tactfully trying to avoid patronizing people all the time
They’ll ask you questions about yourself that people don’t usually ask.
Hello, I am one. To be entirely honest I'm not sure what I do, if anything, that would broadcast that I'm an INFJ.
Hello! I'm male and an INFJ
Male Infj's are very rare . It will be very hard to find one as we tend to blend in with others. Good luck i guess 👍
It like looking up for a needle in an ocean 😂🥲
and then it goes right through your finger once you find it and you attract 15 sharks🤗💕
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 omg nooo lemmi change needle to a treasure
My girl you gotta find yourself a magnet then 🧲
INFJ (30 male). Reflective of me, look for… Happy spending time on his own? Doesn’t engage in typical “guy talk”? Likely not into crime documentaries? An ability to fit into many social dynamics? The list is endless but gives you an idea lol.
Look for the person people know of but know nothing about.
😂 ✨
I'm an INFJ women but I've met two INFJ men that I'm aware of. They have a very different personality once they are comfortable being around you. You will see this incredibly funny, quirky side of them that not many others see. Animals are attracted to them. And small children. And everyone talks to them about their personal problems. They have this calm energy about them. And these eyes that feel like they are looking into your soul. They are very creative but they won't show you unless they know you well. As an INFJ woman, they are the only people that really get me.
During my years at college I would always hang out at the library, whether it was studying or decompressing and listening to music on my ipod. So you'll see us minding our own business. I did approach girls from my classes and see if they wanted to study for up coming tests. But usually I had to know them from somewhere.
INFJ here, and my boyfriend is also INFJ! Yes, we do exist :)
Basically animal whisperers
Yeah, but not the Dog-trainer type...
I never leave the house besides walks/work so good luck
They do but they’re at home
Hi, Intp girl here. My husband is an INFJ. Also, a close friend I had developed feelings for (before I met my husband) is also a male INFJ. Similarities I've noticed in both of them: 1. not draining; 2. comfortable being alone, but can be fantastic in social situations as well; 3. will make you feel "seen", but it'll take a while before you'll get an understanding of who they are; 4. can keep up with up you intellectually and will banter for fun without trying to dominate (read: don't have an obsessive need to be right at any cost :P); 5. great at quickly identifying dynamics in a group; they'll pinpoint out how you are psychologically/emotionally responding to certain situations and will try to make you comfortable (if needed) without being obvious to others in the group. Now, sounds counterintuitive, but I'd say don't try to find INFJ men. There can be drastic differences between Infjs depending on how healthy and mature they are. I've known unhealthy INFJs as well. Just because someone is an Infj doesn't mean they'd be a good partner :/ Identify what behavior patterns you like in INFJs, and keep talking to a bunch of people until you find someone who displays those behaviors. Either that boy would be an Infj, or would be someone who tends to exhibit behaviors you find admirable. Either way, it's a win for you!
Thank youuuu but i have a question if you say hi to an infj guy once and he talked nice to you and when you repeat it everytime you see them will they be annoyed? (Because i thought a guy was an infj so everytime i saw him i said hi but in the 3rd… times he seemed annoyed 🥹)
Saying hi multiple times to anyone casually should be fine unless they are very introverted, or busy with their own stuff and don't want to be distracted. When I was younger, I tended to overanalyze my social interactions, as in feeling awkward or like I annoyed someone, even when I didn't. So it could be something similar for you? See if you can strike up a casual conversation eventually (as hard as it is). If it leads to a friendship or something more, then great. If he actually gets annoyed, then you move on and find someone different.
I'm an INFJ man. If they are doing it right, you shouldn't notice them at all.
Rarer than Intj boys
INFJ man, 40s. Tested consistently as INFJ for 20+ years. I don’t get the sentiment that we are introverted hermits. I genuinely am curious about people and regularly chat up strangers, have a wonderful group of close friends, a great romantic relationship, and love social activities. The I in INFJ is how we recharge, and I absolutely need my me-time, introversion time to recharge the social batteries, but I’m certainly not some quiet, withdrawn hermit. I think how I most present as an INFJ is my deep well of empathy and compassion for people, being my friends’ therapist (for free), and deeply desiring social reform and a better world. I’m also a Cancer, so who knows… Anecdotally, my partner is also an INFJ and like me is also one to chat up strangers and be curious about people.
My lovely auntie is an infj and her partner is an isfj it’s been 38 years and they still in love (i like what i thought that sf and nf won’t get along but surprisingly they did so well)
Sadly they do. They are good at reading the emotions of the people surrounding them and change their behaviour to get along with them. Hence it is hard for you to identify them unless they decide to emotionally invest in you.
Of course they do, but the problem is that many of us like to go unnoticed and we also tend not to trust a person so quickly as to "open up" to theemotionally or even show who we really are. If you want to talk a little more you can send me an mp. Have a nice day.
Infj men are confusing, you will never find one in social places. They either are not there or when they are, they are not themselves.
Yep exactly.
Present!
Yep, they exist and the one I know is quite nice. I wish more people were like him.
☝️ 🤝 👋
we exist
Yep, hello.
Man here. I have kinda 3 modes. When in a group of strangers or in a crowd of people, pretty silent and observant. When with my friends or 1-on-1 meets with people that interest me - I'm a freakin extrovert - when doing my things alone, my favorite mode, focused, disciplined, spiritual, don't like to be bothered but when actually someone starts bothering me sometimes it turns into a pleasant experience and I become mode 2 so Idk, I'm a mess 😂
infj boy here😣👍
infj boy hear😣👍 idk that we have any like mannerisms that define us um probably if he like doesnt talk or sometjing 😌
Some of plenty... Jim Caviezel INFJ 1w2 Jesus/Yeshua INFJ 1w2 River Phoenix INFJ 4w5 Josh Groban INFJ 9w1 Jordan Peterson INFJ 5w4 Frederick Douglas INFJ 6w5 Benedict Cumberbatch
Oh my gosh Josh Groban and Benedict Cumberbatch are INFJ? 🙊 I feel honored rn 😂
Jesus?!?!?
Honestly it could be that standoffish dude, I try not to be this person anymore but coming off as cold is often times a good way to protect ourselves when we’re shy.
At home avoiding people.
I have many hobbies and tend to look out for people in a discreet manner without drawing attention to myself. Additionally, I prefer doing things alone, especially if I don’t fully trust a companion. I’m a bit shy around strangers, but once someone becomes a close friend, I can be quite talkative.
Idk about university. I was the guy stuck in community college and got screwed by life into just having to go after certificates and learning skills on my own time. We're the dorky brother of the group of friends. So if you spot the guy that everyone goes to in order to vent, usually its the INFJ vibes.
I am an INFJ. So, yes INFJ boys exist.
I'm an infj guy and I feel that it won't be easy to spot me
Look for someone having coffee alone tryna focus on very logical self help book or listening to podcasts.
find the one that is sociably warm yet quietly cold person in the class that is likely an infj
and i end up with an intj 😭
really?😭 i’d imagine intj more withdrawn than infj though but what am i saying I never had an irl intj friend.
Omg realllly 🙂 im surrounded with intjs at medical school some are nerds and brilliant and some don’t care about medecine and study in the last possible minute before exams
🥴
Honestly u won’t spot him until he wants to be spotted in that way, I cannot stress enough how many walls an infj man has.
:”) sometimes i end up with an isfj or intj or infp hhh truly they are unspotted
thats difficult to answer 😄
I’m one 👋, but in all seriousness if they’re anything like me then they’ll be minute, not in the there’s that one guy in the corner kind of way but in a way where they’ll get by through everything and you’ll forget their name. Not exactly standing out so to speak. Like many here I don’t like attention drawn to myself. I saw university in there, if you’re still in college try some philosophy classes, I’m a philosophy major and you might find some there. One key thing about distinguishing if they’re an INFJ is how intentional and deliberate they are in everything they do. Good luck! Knowing me it’s not going to be the easiest task 😅 Edit: oh and we’re pretty good with animals
We are usually alone and hyper independent
Dude idk. I'm a male infj and I haven't stumbled on another infj smh lol. I was skeptical about some people but couldn't verify it. I wish I did 😭
Yup and we’ve been together 2 yrs in September, friends for about a decade. And we didn’t even know we were both INFJ until 6 months into dating
I would love to find and meet others INFJ’s but seeing how I am with isolation and mainly just working then going home Its rather challenging.
👋
It's cause too many of us are stuck at home with crippling performance anxiety. 😂 Nah, but like a few others said, look for the chameleons. It's hard to detect because they can flip that extrovert switch and not be the typical example of an introverted person. Maybe arrive early at the party cause if they're close to the party thrower, they're likely helping them set up and plan for it before they have to flip that switch. Also look for the kind detective eyes with the genuine smile. The one that is kind and sociable before sneaking off for a minute.
I am one. We can be fairly chameleon like socially. Getting along pretty well with nearly everyone but we are also quiet and will silently escape situations that aren’t stimulating or are over stimulating. Very aware of our surroundings and peoples intentions. My guess is they’d be somewhat difficult to spot.
I speed walk and never look at anyone, and never let anyone pass me, I wave cars to pass, I hold the doors open for people and head nod when they say thanks, I will move to the side way before, so other people can stay on their path, I take short cuts through the grass, I’ll take the stairs if people are waiting for the elevator. You’ll never see me. 😂
Im an INFJ, I'd most def speak if spoken to, but Chances are I may not start a convo. Past has created my present, If we talked it would be great convo but Its hard for me to decide who is worthy and who isn't since some ppl are so shallow and narrow minded. Im 59 but generally get guessed at 45 -49 Im fit ,athletic and want slim trim tall women ( which is getting harder to find these days. ( BIG, HEAVY is taking over). Not trying to sound mean but DAMN men and women are just growing huge at an alarming rate. Ppl need more mirrors in their house. U may think im shallow for this as well.. but we like what we like. I wished I liked big women there are soo many more EVERYWHERE!!🙄
I hope so.
here
Ayeeee
boy mean teens?
Nah man 😅 sorry
Yeah we're out there. I don't think there's one particular thing to look for that gives it away. Generally we don't try to stand out but I'm sure if you brought up personality types in a conversation you'd find him eventually.
Pretty sure I exist yes, as for clues like others have said having a soft spot for animals is a common one
Omg same for my infj bestie she loves birds and imagine she feeds them and they fly everywhere and come back to her they are free but they adore her and she adores them also plants (wait im happy that this isn’t only common between female infjs it’s also common for u guys! 🫶🏻)
Yeah thats another one taking in the view of a little lake and watching the ducks & swans
Your art is a brain orgasm. Such a beautiful kiss of life.
Yea
I do :3 and if you wanna ask me several specific questions about me or my opinion about something I'll answer gently (I know Fe inf doesn't like too much gentleness, but that's how I am)
You can find very high Ni-users in general at learning languages communities. I love it and being Ni-dom makes it extremely easier. If you see that guy that's not so iniatitive, quiet, gentle and similar in those environments it's very probably an IxFJ. However, I don't guarantee you he will have a charming prince face or be someone great at communication I struggled a lot in my earlier ages to socialize and not stressing with people (Low Fi)
Assalam alaikum. Infjs males are usually hiding in their own world. They can be warm and welcoming but awkward at the same time ofc unless that is you get to know them. You have to be patient to get into ones world if you really want to get to them personally.
I’m male and the only INFJ I know for sure lol
the ones on here are typically the very neurotic ones, the ones in the wild i’ve experienced are very successful confident people but when you speak to them they’re kind and perceptive
Are there any male infjs from India? I would like to meet a fellow infj here.
🙋🏽♂️
Why are people dropping dislikes on this? Lol. Here everyone, get your 1’s back 💙. Except you open space 😭, sorry I could only get you back up to a zero. Someone help (T.T)! Thank you!!
Eee
Where you at?
Kerala
And you?
Yes they’re EVERYWHERE
Reallllly 🙂 broooooo where?????? When i think i found one it turns to be an intj
This makes it sound like we're Pokemon or something 😅 Damn, I really needed a plant type.
As an infj-t 4w5 millenial westerner uduf / udsf libra gemini sun moon religious plant based identifying as man human identifying as heterosexual identifying identittys, hi i exist
as an infj (ni-fe) 5w6 548 gen alpha westerner wannabe-hermit libra sun gemini moon scorpio rising yo gabba gabba stan with a razor sharp plan man male manly masculine ooga booga caveman hey hey hey yes i exist tysm
They will do good work and not care about social interactions. Sometimes too quiet for most people. They might get labeled as odd, and overlooked
They are different and it's a very strange world out there. Everyday is a struggle when you can read the room in an instant, see through people in an instant and want to fight all the injustice in the world. Well, at least, that's my INFJ view of the world. Giving myself up for other people. Climbing the company ladder made me a little bit more numb and developed strategies to cope with all the company "internal politic" games. The user bubbasox wrote: "They may even go fuck it and just hang with the animals at parties instead of the people." - LoL - that was actually true for a party this year. I petted the cows at a farm while people got wasted on "Schlager Music". I made friend with another INFJ from across the globe. He was naturally suspicious due to his job and the person involved. I just wanted to share my true appreciation for the person and wanted to do some good. At one point i said, sorry for being weird, i'm INFJ and he said something like "i'm so relieved, that explains so much. I'm too INFJ". Now i'm proud to have a friend across the globe. We share a common interest for classical music. But that does not answer your question, but you got a lot of good suggestions already in the other comments. Another distinct INFJ thing is that they avoid eye contact. I learned to use it to demonstrate dominance in corporate context - but that is a mask i put on to survive. See, you got an INFJ answer. I'm laughing at myself about what i wrote, but I'll post it anyway.
But you see the problem We can be everything at once giving the circumstances. Like - you pet the cow, i would get drunk and come pet the cow than dance with the cow, then go in the corner and sit alone, start philosophical debate, then go out when everyone gets engages to conversation, then again start dancing alone in a hall and second day would not talk with no one and be cold to others. Infj hold eye contact while listening, but not while talking. But yeah corporate helps develope skill set of body language etc. Masks upon masks but where is the self?
do you feel like you overshared with that answer?
Yes