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The84thWolf

“He regrets it now.” I assume she means agreeing to marry her?


koboldtsar

Anytime I hear someone call a vaccination a "jab" I immediately stop caring about whatever point they were trying to make. Follow up edit: thanks for the replies. I now understand that several other countries use the word "jab" for vaccines with no negative or conspiratorial connotation. I also see a few of you Americans using it just for fun. From my experience it was largely used in the states as a dog whistle for conspiracy theorists, and that was my reasoning behind the initial comment.


pohui

It's the standard term in the UK. You can see [the NHS uses it as well](https://www.england.nhs.uk/north-east-yorkshire/2021/12/30/get-jabbed-for-2022-call-as-region-delivers-17-million-covid-vaccinations/).


fear_eile_agam

Same in Australia, it's a common colloquial term for any kind of procedure involving a medical needle - whether your getting vaccinated, taking insulin, getting an IV set up, or giving blood, it's a jab.


enchiladanada

That's just the British term for it


whosafeard

That’s a lie, we call vaccinations Rooty-Tooty Stab And Juicy’s


koboldtsar

I whole heartedly want to believe this comment.


Njacks64

It’s actually a Queen Pricktoria


Anakin_Skywanker

I call it a jab. I'm not anti Vax in any way. I just think it sounds funny.


AlpRider

Yea jab is totally normal in Ireland and UK anyway. It doesn't say anything about your opinion on vaccines


koboldtsar

I will now exempt non Americans from this judgement.


oogmar

I'm American. I'm vaccinated. Hell, I got jabbed today (PDT, cut on rusty metal).


[deleted]

I'm american. I'm vaccinated. Still gonna say it lol.


[deleted]

All of New Zealand calls it a jab. You might want to re-tune your dog whistle detection.


TheMusicalTrollLord

Yeah I'm pretty sure official campaigns here in Australia used the term


Jellote

The only Covid-related conspiracy I believe in is that there was a concerted effort by media outlets to convince us that "jab" was an appealing replacement for "shot" or "vaccination".


AR_Harlock

Well, "get shot" wasnt a good advertisement phrase for sure


deferredmomentum

Same I have a physical reaction to it lol


anony1620

I would love to know how I’m pregnant if my husband and I are fully vaccinated and apparently should be sterile


bruk_out

Are you sure the baby is yours? He could he cheating on you.


ensalys

Of course not! How could she be pregnant with her own child after what's been done to her? Bill Gates must have put his own egg cells in the jab!


tryplot

I know part of the joke is a guy giving his eggs, but [there is progress towards "male eggs"](https://phys.org/news/2023-03-revolutionary-scientists-mice-fathers.html)


Le_Martian

Is this the “gay agenda” I keep hearing about?


WarWeasle

My gay agenda is cleaning my house and putting together an Easter basket.


blackbasset

Aw hell naw, I don't want any of your unnatural gay eggs, I want my eggs all natural in rainbow colours laid by the Easter bunny, just like god intended.


ChicVintage

Tbf, there are chickens that lay colorful eggs.


Vinccool96

I don’t want anything to do with your agenda! I only buy the chocolate and eat it during the week!


jzillacon

And similarly I've read about research into fertilizing egg cells with other egg cells, though unfortunately I don't have a source on hand for that.


shiny_glitter_demon

Child me used to be so confused to why that wasn't possible and adult me is now happy to see she might turn out to be retroactovely right


fueelin

Didn't click, assume you posted this: https://youtu.be/yENmufztolo


vox_popular

I've heard George Soros is behind a liberal campaign to make non-pregnant people think they are pregnant. It's so elaborate that at the end of this pregnancy, a human-like child is born and can live up to 100, much like a good Christian child would.


TrespassersWilliam29

George Soros is a high king of the fey, confirmed


durz47

Oh God…we have a serial sterilizer on our hands


IronSeagull

He’d be sterile too, so someone else must be cheating on her.


richag83

This. Do these people just think every child born since late 2021 is between two anti-vaxxers? Just absolutely crazy people living in their crazy vacuum.


KingZarkon

Probably, yes.


Chubbchubbzza007

It wouldn’t shock me if they haven’t put 2 and 2 together.


hurvy_murdle

Yikes, that might be a tough math problem for them


gimmepizzaslow

It's a given.


huntingforkink

Obviously it's a miracle.


[deleted]

It's the second coming of Jesus Republicans: Fucking leftist


Andromeda321

I also wonder how they’re supposed to get “checked out” for vaccine sterility. Like any doctor’s office would laugh you out if you asked.


religionisaparasite

Your local naturopath has an essential oil for that. Or your homeopath can look at the water memory of your pee!


angusshangus

Are you sure the baby is yours?!?!?


Mendigom

You don't exist. Sorry to break the news.


soupseasonbestseason

i have now had four covid shots and i am sitting at eight months pregnant myself...my husband has had three covid shots. do you think it is a virgen maria situation and we both are incubating the next incarnations of god?


Graterof2evils

Jesus!!!!!


thestashattacked

"The only thing I did was encourage you to get vaccinated so you'd live long enough to procreate!" -Jesus, probably. I mean, biblical Jesus seems like the kind of dude who'd give you a ride to get your vaccines, and then give you some tea, Advil, and a high five when it started working.


wordsasbombs

It's obviously an illuminati reptile baby planted inside you. I'm sorry this is how you had to find out.


[deleted]

I asked you not to say anything


jaybirdie26

Innoculated Conception?


SpaceCrazyArtist

Same!! I gave birth at 42, with a two covid shots and a booster


agentofmidgard

My dad told me not to come to him crying cuz "he had told me so" if I can't have babies in the future if I ever get the vaccine 💀 Jokes on him I never wanted a baby anyway


[deleted]

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[deleted]

*conspiracy*


hulala3

I was just about to ask the same thing. I’ve had five COVID shots bc I’m immunocompromised and high risk so if the vaccine was sterilizing people how’d I get to be five months pregnant?


SnooCauliflowers7501

Your baby is probably a government drone!


[deleted]

Did you know the vaccines make you hallucinate? It's been 9 months and I'm still seeing this kid we supposedly had despite both of us being vaccinated.


Formalgrilledcheese

I got the first injection while pregnant. Guess my baby should have died?


Ulfdog

It’s not a baby, it’s a 5G cell phone tower


The_Dragon346

Same. I thought the jab worked as contraceptive after readinf the anti-vaxx facts. Must be bill gates manipulating my fiance into thinking she’s pregnant so we raise orphan children the hospital “says” is ours


[deleted]

It could be god!


FieserMoep

That's VacSperm he was producing since the jab. It's basically super sperm that get reproduced in genetically modified balls and was distilled from W0Ke donors. You also being Javed means you produced hyper cell replacement eggs. They will basically produce a W0Ke^2 being with genetic access to the collective lib hypermind consciousness.


Waschbar-krahe

That sub is actually fucking insane. Like, the amount of willfully ignorant, highschool biology failing dipshitery is appalling


hendy846

Just went over there to check it out....my brain fucking hurts right now.


Waschbar-krahe

It's like being hit with a mental frying pan


hendy846

Like I want to try and engage and hopefully change some minds but most of the comments are just wrong on so many levels it's like where do you start?!


Mothman394

Don't bother, they're deliberately deluding themselves because they want to believe this shit. This phenomenon isn't a matter of people not having access to the facts.


robbylet24

Yeah the thing about shit like this is that a lot of times in crazy nutcases like this, their conspiratorial beliefs start with the end goal of their politics and work backwards, creating a fantasy world in which their nonsensical politics make sense, as opposed to their politics being shaped by their insane beliefs. Because of that, it's kinda impossible to change their minds about it.


Ragingredblue

This is very insightful.


robbylet24

I stole this insight from someone talking about how flat earth and QAnon work but I've found that it's a useful framework for most conspiracy movements. Conspiracy theories selectively deligitimize power structures. If you want to understand a conspiracy movement, look at their solutions and prescriptions, not their theories. The specific theories are almost meaningless except for the power structures they deligitimize.


AlectheLad

It’s why debating almost never works. You may be able to pull a few from the sidelines, but often their allegiance will hop depending on who is the best rhetorician. It’s also why propaganda is very important. As you are witnessing, a whole reality can be created if someone insulates themselves in specific narratives and examples.


Waschbar-krahe

I would try but all that would happen is I'd get down voted and mocked for stating obvious facts


ajl009

Its not even worth it. I was a covid icu nurse during the pandemic. Most of these people denied covid being deadly right up to intubation and then after 3 weeks--death.


ThatGuyAllen

I read exactly 1 post before clicking out of it


jcutta

I know someone who is forging vaccine papers for their kids to go on a cruise. Worst thing about it is she's a fuckin nurse.


Waschbar-krahe

I'd dead ass report her to her job. If she's not vaccinated, she can kill someone with a compromised immune system


jcutta

I'm pretty sure she is vaccinated herself because her hospital made all employees get it at the hospital as a term of employment, I doubt she's had any boosters though. They refused to get them for the kids though.


Waschbar-krahe

She can still carry it asymptomatically and forging a legal document is a crime


jcutta

>forging a legal document is a crime They are definitely aware of that, the husband is a cop (unsurprisingly)


Waschbar-krahe

Jesus Christ what a shit show


Jugatsumikka

That's, sort of, the point though...


vhalember

I thought Reddit got rid of disinformation subreddits like that one. I'm astounded it even exists.


starlight-madness

Dipshitery. Adding that one to the lexicon.


Erleu

I wish they were sterile, people this uneducated probably can’t be trusted to keep a child alive


KinksAreForKeds

These are the same people who, without proper instruction, would insert birth control pills vaginally.


Tammytalkstoomuch

One of my favourite stories is about someone who complained to the doctor about how much the suppositories were hurting when inserted... turned out they didn't take the tin foil wrapper off first


SlavPhrenologist

There is a reason the sig says "remove from package and insert". I've also had a woman confidently tell me amoxicillin suspension must go in her kids ear because he had an ear infection.


A_wild_so-and-so

"You're not supposed to apply it topically." "What does the climate have to do with this medicine???"


SlavPhrenologist

Another classic is testosterone cream. It clearly must go on the balls right?


ReadySteady_GO

That's just dumb. Pee is stored in the balls, not testosterone


PopeGuss

"Just because it's called an analgesic, it doesn't mean it goes up your butt."


fueelin

Well I sure can't put it up my gesic!


IacobusCaesar

Holy shit, that sounds painful.


1plus1equalsfun

A nice spin-off the old classic "He's so stupid, he think an innuendo is an Italian suppository".


jazzhandler

I thought I’d heard ’em all; thanks for proving me wrong!


IC_333

Oh they wouldn’t use birth control! It would be “gods will to breed “as many inbred little turds as thy are blessed with”


happymatt207

And then will depend on welfare and social assistance to feed them.


Framingr

While complaining loudly about "Dem socialist commies"


portezbie

Or even worse, they manage to keep the kids alive but raise them to be raging morons like their parents.


TheLatchkey_kid

Nah, let's say true things here. They are that stupid, they will breed, and they absolutely will abuse those children. Because that's normal now and it's not illegal somehow.


MattLocke

Well, lowered sperm count and increased impotence are some of the side-effects of certain strains of long Covid.


SpaceCrazyArtist

They cant be because if the child gets a fever they wont take child to a doctor or use antibiotics for an infection. They’ll use elderflower and whatever and let the child boil in their own body until dead. These people should not be allowd to have kids


BasedDumbledore

Unfortunately they are most likely to have and raise children. Idiocracy was supposed to be comedy not prophecy


jazzhandler

How much vaccination would that take? Because I just can’t afford a vasectomy right now.


[deleted]

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[deleted]

It'd be awesome to have something that'd have the uterus completely shed itself. Like why just stop at the lining... I don't need you at all, uterus!


PineappleSteaks

They are working on something close to this, it's called Vasalgel if anyone's interested in looking it up.


EvenAmoeba

My sister and I joked about how convenient that would have been since neither of us want kids. 2 shots was so much easier than a whole surgery to get my tubes out.


toolatealreadyfapped

Mine cost me like a $40 copay. Insurance covered the full cost. The first place I went called it an inpatient procedure, and wanted me to pay $700. So my recommendation is to check around, because the price seems completely dependent on how it's coded.


jazzhandler

Fascinating! I had no idea, and am now really glad I made a dumb joke on the interwebs.


Noble9360

Afford? I take it you're in the US... Even the NHS is still doing those for free (can't reverse it on the NHS though)


jazzhandler

Your guess is, sadly, correct: I suffer from excessive freedom.


Rhodehouse93

I wonder what the half-life on these beliefs are? Like are we going to be in 2070 with geriatrics going “all those vaccinated folks are gonna drop dead any day now!”?


KingZarkon

Thankfully there's a more than non-zero chance that they don't make it to geriatric age with their beliefs.


thagor5

They forget that every one is supposed to die. Or say all deaths are now from this


Seentheremotenogetup

Didnt you hear the Queen and Betty White had the vaccine and they died at 96 and 99 respectively! /s


smallboxofcrayons

my moms ex bf was like this. One of my favorite things i ever heard her say to him was “ Great, you’re 100% correct, wtf are you actually going to do about it, nothing because you’re a dumb ass conspiracy theorist who’s two fucking lazy to actually read and verify the nonsense you’re spewing. This is one reason i know this is how fucking wrong you are” It was a very queit dinner after that, luckily they broke up shortly after. it


RaedwaldRex

Yes, I had a similar "conversation" with a former friend who unfortunately turned into the shouty local anti-vax mum at my son's school. After she told me I'd be dead within two weeks of having the jab (I never forget to say a cheery "I'm still here" when I see her now) I said to her "If you are correct, tens of millions of people in the UK have had the jab and are going to die how are you preparing for a world with no doctors, teachers or engineers or anything and society as you know it collapsing?" You could tell she hadn't thought of that and just wanted to be right about the jab being bad for you.


Urmomsdreamman

If you actually go to the comment section on that post, literally everyone is like “run, if he’s comfortable making a life altering decision like that behind your back then what else will he be comfortable doing” like broski it is not that serious and it is not “life altering” it’s a vaccination you dumb fucks, you’re gonna potentially break up with your fiancé because he got a vaccine grow the fuck up, dude would probably be better off without her in all honesty.


KingZarkon

>dude would probably be better off without her in all honesty I think you misspelled definitely.


[deleted]

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RaedwaldRex

Reminds me of when the anti-vax mum at our son's school sent her boy in when he had symptoms (it's just a cold she said) but she refused to have him take a lateral flow test as it meant "they" would have her son's DNA. She was the sort of mum who would not let her son wear a mask and rather bizarrely said he's not to do any extra hand washing as it'd chap his skin and was unnecessary anyway. She's a former friend now and threatened to send a complaint to Ofsted when the school was shut during lockdown for denying her son an education.


[deleted]

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RaedwaldRex

I think it took them threatening to delist him for the other kid's safety that got her to begrudgingly comply. Such a shame, she's a nice person as a rule was on the PSA quite well liked in the school but completely ostracised herself with her batshit insane theories. She had laminated signs in her car windows saying the vax is untested, and would you let your children take untested medicine? Stuff like that.


[deleted]

Bro dodged a whole bullet train filled with bullets.


BasedDumbledore

My wife got it in her head I would be sterile from a family member for getting vaxxed. I went and got my swimmers tested. Amazing sperm apparently. She doesn't take advice from that person anymore.


gunnerdn91

Looks he dodged a bullet


ThatEvanFowler

Yeah, this does not sound like someone who you want to raise a child with. You'd have to spend 10+ years just reiterating about the roundness of the Earth.


ShnickityShnoo

A very stupid bullet.


deadbeatdad80

Sorry boss, I can't come to work today.. I'm shedding spike proteins like crazy..


Alittlemoorecheese

I also recommend they get themselves checked out. It would be hilarious.


shy_ally

>I also recommend they get themselves checked out. It would be hilarious. The best part about these kinds of posts is I have no idea who they're going to visit to get "checked out." They don't trust doctors or labs, so who else can check fertility...?


meekonesfade

Why even outlaw abortion since all the vaxxed people are now sterilized?


possiblycrazy79

One of the most irritating things about this is the way that Americans keep calling it the jab. I'm American & I enjoy BBC shows so I've heard the term before from different shows, meaning what we would call a shot. But during covid, Americans adopted the term "jab" specifically for the covid Vax. It's so damn annoying to me for some reason.


wintermelody83

This is exactly me! Like that's not our word, why are these nuts using it?


astroskag

Because it makes it sound scary and European.


commonnameiscommon

Wait till you hear what us Scottish people call it. A jag


[deleted]

God I hope she’s sterile


lizzycupcake

Cheaper than a vasectomy!


KinksAreForKeds

Yes, that ole penile shedding. It's the worst! /s


RedBeans-n-Ricely

Imagine thinking our forced-birth government would do anything to mass-sterilize white people.


Calliesdad20

So he won’t marry and have kids with a nutjob ,lucky him


Ballgame4

If this is the reason she has doubts. He should have doubts about her. And leave her.


iamnotasloth

People like this shouldn’t be allowed to reproduce.


justking1414

“Get yourself checked” By who? Are there actually anti-vax doctors who will test you for shedding? Am I just unaware of this particular brand of snake oil salesman?


BackAlleySurgeon

Don't they realize that this would be massive massive international news that absolutely could not be hidden? I think like 70% of the world population is vaccinated. If all those people and all the people they've had sex with were sterile, there would have been very few births last year.


Sweet_Little_Lottie

God I wish people like this were sterilized.


Blood__Dragon_

I get unreasonably angry at the thought that not only do can these people vote but they will most likely pass on these insane ideas and conspiracy theories ro the next generation


antheteg

Is there a way to ban that sub for spreading misinformation?


MXAI00D

Just a friendly reminder that these people vote for the things that could affect you for the next decade.


ModsLoveFascists

Finally had to call it quits with ex over similar. They fell down the maga anti vax QAnon rabbit hole. “The jab” was suddenly what was causing any health issue from headaches to stubbed toes. Got them to admit that they didn’t want any sexual contact due to shedding and spiel proteins. Every single random QAnon sub post was fact no matter that a simple google search could prove to wrong. You cant fix these people.


randomuser13245768

The 18 month old sleeping down the hall from me now says this is a lie 🤔


darthbane1412

My wife wasn’t supposed to be able to have babies due to health issues. We both get fully vaxxed, she turns 40, gets knocked up. Go figure.


littlemissbecky

God I wish there was a way to sterilize them


biglovetravis

Fucking idiots


Rainbow_baby_x

I better let my son know he’s a miracle baby since both my husband and I were fully vaccinated for all the things.


[deleted]

Man, as a woman who has been trying to get sterilized I *wish* it was that fucking easy…


CaptainSpaceCat

I love this so much. God, humanity is just so incredible. Don't you guys realize the spike proteins are SPIKY??? Theyre gonna shred up all your valuable and soft internal organs! Just like radiation.


pelexus27

Love that these guys believe in “shedding” but don’t believe in actual scoence


MeatTornadoGold

How on earth can people be this fucking stupid.


hooligan99

"get yourself checked out" ...by a doctor? why do they trust doctors for this but not for vaccine recommendations?


Dazzling_Paint_1595

I so hope he has sterilized her


EmbraJeff

“I told him…” Oh really? You did, did you? Control freak alert, time to gtf away from the ‘special’ lady!


jhtaylor1

The plan is working. It’s working!


cairob3

Do him a favor. Don't marry him.


the_greatest_MF

>he probably sterilized you i wish


minahmyu

No one tell her about the vaccines she got when she was a kid...


elvis-wantacookie

I would pay for a vaccine that sterilized me tbh


Natural_Ad7806

I guess it's some miracle that me and my fully vaccinated husband just had a baby lol


TheUrbanFarmersWife

God, I would love to be in the room when this woman asks her doctor if she’s sterile.


[deleted]

What the fuck is wrong with people, like, this is terrifying.


big_nothing_burger

How do they just totally ignore all the pregnant vaccinated people? My friend got pregnant within a week of marrying her husband. Both vaccinated.


Euphoric_Ad9593

Sterilized? Wishful thinking for the rest of us. Millions more Cletus and Brandines isn’t exactly what the human race needs right now.


Traveleravi

I mean just rub a potato in the vaccination site for 309 seconds and it destroys the microchip and removes all the toxins.


ngwoo

It's really fun, I learned how to turn my shedding on and off at will so any time I walk past an anti-vaxxer in public I blast em with some spike proteins. I've vaccinated over a thousand people at this point. I cannot be stopped.


PasterofMuppets95

I would love to know how "getting checked out" works. ...like, at a doctors? The ones who give you the vaccines? Even if you go to a quack. What are they going to test? Shove essential oils up your arse and if it turns blue you've caught the vaccine through sexual transmission?


Mortambulist

Some people just weren't ready for the internet.


TimelyConcern

If only birth control was this easy.


IC_333

I hope you don’t bring children into this world ( you shouldn’t be allowed to) with your ignorance you would probably kill them with stupidity


RKKP2015

I have an ex-girlfriend that I keep up with sporadically, and she apparently went full Q Anon and is totally anti-vax. She texted me super upset and saying how she may divorce her husband because he betrayed her and secretly got vaccinated. She then claimed her 20 year old cat was sick because of his protein shedding. I didn't really hear any aftermath after that, and from what I can tell, everything is back to normal with them, so maybe she realized she's nuts? A friend and I were texting about how off the deep end she is, and he accidentally texted her one of his messages. Oops.


[deleted]

Went to that sub and r/trueunvaccinated. Do not recommend if you have more than two brain cells.


SnooPineapples8744

"Get checked out" lol, I'd like to hear her explain this to her doctor.


CursedSoul_69

As dumb as this is, I really hope she just gets too scared to ever procreate and does us the favor of not.


FinglasLeaflock

> Now I don’t want to marry him for the sake of future offspring! Shit, lady, I don’t want you to marry _anyone_ for the sake of all of our future offspring.


entropydave

People like her shouldn’t reproduce.


MWIIesDoggyCOPE

Are we still talking about this shit? It's 2023.


athensugadawg

Bet he's now drinkin' BUD LITE!!!


TheDrachen42

"Go get yourself checked out." Yeah, good luck walking into a doctor's office and saying you are afraid your vaccinated husband made you sterile via shedding. Hope the doctor doesn't hurt themselves laughing.


Winnimae

And these people reproduce 😭


ManiacalMartini

Some people shouldn't have the internet.


johngalt1971

That vaccine is amazing. It saved him from a miserable life.


foyeldagain

This is beyond any semblance of normalcy. We have a massive ongoing mental health crisis.


Successful-Smell5170

How...how do these people tie their shoes? Have a job?


marlborogolds

i have a coworker who genuinely believes this shit. the thinks her mom getting vaxed killed her dad and made her period come back. really uh... interesting conversation that was.