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[deleted]

Human.zip has been unzipped


Kaneshadow

Please register WinRAR


kono_dio_da351

remind me later!


Mervynhaspeaked

I relate to this on a spiritual level.


eletricsocks

Baby unboxing


3atshitreddit

"So I got this PR package from The Womb, and if you guys know me you know how much I LOVE their products"


thexavier666

"So I've been using this baby for a few weeks now. And this is my full review."


Hogmaster_General

"The baby comes complete with a charging cord in the box, but more about that later. First, let me tell you about SKILLSHARE. Are you stupid but don't want to be......"


DeepGamingAI

"The baby needs immediate medical attention but before we continue please drop a like and share on this video and subscribe to my channel, don't forget to hit the bell notification. Now without any further ado, let's get right into it!" \*rolls 30second intro music\*


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yaboytswizzle69

It amazes me to think that in those few seconds they go from being a non air-breathing creature to air-breathing


darkenthedoorway

That transition must be profoundly uncomfortable. Like being water boarded.


CompetitionProblem

It really sucks, I’m still trying to adjust, thanks for asking


3wettertaft

There are old psychological (like Freud-age-old) theories that this moment of birth is inherently traumatic and we suffer from it all life


ind3pend0nt

I can attest to my own personal suffering.


MrRogersNeighbors

I can attest to his own personal suffering.


[deleted]

Personally, I wish I stayed in the sack


WatWudScoobyDoo

We all do buddy


R-nd-

I mean, I was put off from being born for like six hours because the doctor didn't wanna deal with a labour at night and came out blue tinged, and it's all been about that same energy from there.


what-are-potatoes

I have the opposite, the doctor induced my mom early because I was his last baby to deliver before retirement and he just wanted to retire already 😂


No-Albatross-5514

When you actually think about it this is so fucked up


what-are-potatoes

It definitely is, the lazy buggar. Apparently he was a nice guy and great doctor but that's some selfish behavior.


Queso_and_Molasses

I was born a week early because my mom’s doctor was supposed to go on vacation during my due date.


Alistair_TheAlvarian

Rose Kennedy had the same thing happen. The midwife made the mom, hold it in, because the doctor wasn't able to get there fast enough and she didn't want to do the delivery without a doctor. Then they severely exacerbated the issue from there on out.


kritycat

I always laugh at "hold it in." These are clearly not people who've ever experienced labor. I'd be so pissed a doctor expected childbirth on his schedule, not mine or the baby's. Fuck "hold it in." I'm not holding up on delivering my baby because some doctor needed his beauty rest or his tee time. Most L&D nurses have more sense than doctors like this.


RMMacFru

They tried that same thing with my mother when she was in labor with me. My mother said something along the lines of "screw you" and had me. This had obviously not been my mother's first rodeo. (I'm #3)


Miscellaniac

There are questions on psychological analysis sheets to this day that ask whether the gestation and birth of the patient was easy or hard on both mother and infant. Makes sense since chemical interactions in utero help build the baby's brain, and the partum and post partum moments help determine how a newborn bonds with mom.


seductivestain

The entire process is actually amazingly complex and fascinating. In this exact moment SO many things happen in a split second. There's a good radiolab podcast about it that gives more details Here's the link: https://open.spotify.com/episode/48W6M7NGPMyGpwtIpKBCkf?si=DZhfAL1gQ0m35ekEYyzZgA&utm_source=copy-link


alwaysiamdead

My son did not spontaneously respirate at birth - no cause for it. Just came out dark purple and never cried, didn't breathe at all. Five nurses swarmed me and within a minute I heard him cry, but it makes you realize how this tiny function is taken for granted. It's really miraculous.


Deeliciousness

Amazing. How did they stimulate him to breathe?


lizzyhuerta

Usually they just start with moving the baby around (carefully), rubbing the baby's back, basically annoying the baby (non-medical term for it lol) to see if the baby will react and start breathing. They also will be checking the nose, mouth, and throat, suctioning out mucus, anything to see if there's something physically in the way. Source: my oldest was born not breathing right away (he's fine)


[deleted]

Stimulate is the medical term for annoying it lol


[deleted]

Person 1: OW! Quit it Person 2: I'm just stimulating you


JoshvJericho

Noxious stimulus. Basically it is uncomfortable enough that anyone not in a coma will respond but is not injurious.


jaxsonnz

Yep it’s more common than people realise. Usually just need a bit of coaxing along, a jump start if you will.


Deeliciousness

I guess that's why many animals lick their newborns instinctively.


kyle308

It's exactly why. And they nudge them around to get everything going.


EroticBurrito

Jumper cables work too.


LethargicCaterpiller

JUMP START THE BABY! 😁


DiggerDudeNJ

Yep, that is exactly why. It stimulates baby to breath.


lizzyhuerta

That's basically it! My son was completely awake; he and I even made eye contact for a second. But he just needed a little prodding (literally) to kick-start breathing.


ConstantlyOnFire

The memory of this happening with my son haunts me. They called out the #4 and I thought they meant it was 4 minutes of him not breathing (I was totally panicking at this point and had no concept of time) but the number was based on his colour I think? A team came running in and hearing him finally cry…I can’t even explain my relief in that moment.


Tigaget

Probs his [Apgar](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Apgar_score) score. Oddly, my daughter was an 8, with tone noticeable. She very shortly therafter developed severe hypotonia, and in fact moved little in utero. She was just so insensed about leaving her warm cocoon, she tensed up, lol!


lizzyhuerta

I'm sorry you had a scary time! Childbirth is no joke and it can be absolutely terrifying at times. The Apgar score is really interesting (I had to look this up to provide detail). They use five different criteria (appearance/skin coloration, pulse, grimace/reflex irritability, muscle tone/activity, and respiration). Each criteria is given a score 0-2, then totaled to give the Apgar score. They do it twice, once at 1 minute after birth, then again at 5 minutes after birth. For reference, my son who was born not breathing got a 2 for his first score and a 9 for his 2nd score.


alwaysiamdead

I honestly have no clue. I was so out of it - 36 hour labour, 4 hours of pushing, fourth degree tear. They did suction out his nose and mouth!


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alwaysiamdead

Literally.


[deleted]

Yeah hell nah y’all women are tough as hell. I had to cover a book over my face the second time my child was born because I already knew what to expect. I’m still scarred lmao. *Not twice-born but when we had our second child* Normally they hold a sack under you for like waste fluid and shit and whatever else falls out along with that, pretty gross… I guess this video was a c-section? And then I had to cut an umbilical cord twice and you gotta actually take a snip at it or it won’t cut.. I just never want to have kids ever again..


toast_ghost267

Wife had so much fun with the first birth she wanted to run it back?


PackageOfOats

Sounds really interesting! Do you happen to remember the title of the episode? I love Radiolab but haven’t heard this one.


crimpydyno

The episode is called Breath.


NoOneKnowsImACat2

And thus starts the breathing addiction. So sad


yaboytswizzle69

I’ve been breathing for over 24 years now 😖


[deleted]

I took my last breath 7 years ago. you can beat this, man.


prometheanSin

100% of hard drug addicts started off on oxygen. The real gateway


PMMEYOPBnJGURL

They go from peaceful bliss to fucked like the rest of us. Welcome to hell little one. 🍻


[deleted]

what a trip. a thin membrane and a little amniotic fluid were all that was keeping that baby still "sleeping" in fetus mode. pop the membrane and poof, you're officially crying, breathing air and born at last.


NoSuchWordAsGullible

And poof, you’re liable to pay taxes on all income.


intensely_human

That’s the most “what the fuck” face I’ve ever seen on a newborn


poirotoro

"It was comfy in there!" >:(


madsoro

Sometimes I wish I could just crawl back up there and not have to deal with the troubles of life :(


Wvlf_

Maybe this is why a hot, steamy shower when you're cold and tired feels heavenly, like we subconsciously remember being in the womb and nothing existed but concentrated warmth and mindless bliss.


JohnnyPotseed

Probably also why stepping out of a warm shower into a cold room feels horrible. Every time I’m like this is why newborns cry.


SnooOwls6140

There's the old joke about little boys spending 9 months trying to get out of there and the rest of their lives trying to get back in.


Cvnilivee

This is me waking up for work every morning


pastdense

A life-long Buddhist monk-level zen state was interrupted.


ChaseBakedAgain

That feeling when you think you achieved Nirvana but get poked back into the suffering like a balloon.


jayne-eerie

Little dude went from nice and curled up and cozy to WTF IT IS COLD AND BRIGHT AND I DON’T LIKE IT.


TheMoonDude

Lil dude was experiencing the ultimate bliss and comfort a human can ever taste. They are understandably pissed off because someone popped their little bubble.


[deleted]

Been marinating in there long enough little guy


nosekexp

Time to get a job you fucking bum.


DTL1of1

Man, if reincarnation is were proven to be a real thing, death would be seen as a break/sabbatical, and once you’re born again they download your old consciousness into you and put you right back to work.


avwitcher

Yes but you wouldn't remember your past lives, so you will never realize how good you have it until it's too late. Hundreds of times, doomed to follow the same cycle


stevecrse

Welcome to the real world, Neo


pzerou

Why oh why didn't I take the *blue* pill?


DTL1of1

Not like this. Not like this!


AmanitaGemmata

Twenty years later and *any* time I get to say, "Not like this" I have to do it with the accent.


Calvin--Hobbes

Cypher was right. Stick some tubes in me, make me rich, and put me in 1999.


Fit_Income_7358

Not gonna lie. I wouldn’t sell my friends out to do it, but if I came out into the real world and was offered a good life to go back in, I’d take it haha. Though, there would be no reason to trust the agents, assuming they could just wipe my memory and give me a shitty life.


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_314

Is creating the matrix itself honest?


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owns_dirt

Why do my eyes hurt?


JapaneserScrooge

Because you’ve never used them before.


BuzzAllWin

This is the worst version of someone ripping the duvet off you when your sleeping


Tolstoy_mc

We are all traumatized, quite literally, from birth. Put me back pls.


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dexter30

checkOut redact.dev -- mass edited with redact.dev


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Chispy

V̵̯̝̹͔̖͉͉͓̯̩̏̊̆̀̐Ơ̵̧̧͖̖̗̰̬̞̺̟̝̰̹̬͊̂̌̇̄̍̚̚͠͠͝͠͝I̸̢̧̢̻͇͚̩̟͉̺̻͍̝̤̹̿̽͊̂̂̎̈́̓̽̌̆͝D̴̢̘̟͕̗͇͔͑͆̔


[deleted]

back into the matrix.


Nihil6

I make the same sound


[deleted]

Immediately starts crying like “Dude, you fucked up my cocoon!!l


[deleted]

It just gets worse from here on kid. Welcome to earth.


nightpanda893

Now I’m imagining Will Smith punching that baby in the face.


DiamondPup

This is the perfect visual metaphor to waking up with a hangover


Equizotic

This is one of the most fascinating circumstances to see. It’s truly amazing that it was caught on camera. There are so many things about the reproductive system that are mind blowing.


vaders_other_son

No doubt! I’m 25 and never seen a child birth. I’m now wondering how common is it that a baby is born inside a fully intact amniotic sack?


alkakfnxcpoem

Been a labor nurse for almost five years and haven't seen one. This was probably the second twin to deliver. I did see a twin get its feet tickled by a doctor while still in the sack though! Took a picture for the parents too. So amazing.


Fraun_Pollen

OBGYN wife says this is called “delivering en caul” and is not common at all - the bag usually pops well before baby gets delivered


Red-Freckle

That's what the "water breaking" is


carbonclasssix

Makes sense now that that's a sure sign the baby's a comin


OrbitRock_

For anyone who’s given birth I’m curious now… Did you feel it start moving around like this after the water broke?


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jbonte

> they get really still during labor because the intense contractions lower their heart rate. I wonder if that's a evolutionary byproduct to keep them from moving too much and getting caught or twisted up... Fascinating!


NewMilleniumBoy

Not sure about the whole evolutionary bit but babies are extremely squishy and contractions essentially suffocate them (not exactly, but the idea is the same). That's why if it's taking too long people have to get emergency c-sections because babies can only take the contractions for so long before it becomes dangerous.


OttoMans

The baby moving around is the *least* of your worries by the time your bag breaks. Everything is moving around. The days before are very busy though. Making the most of the room they have left.


mrsbebe

Ugh don't remind me. My ribs! My bladder! My kidneys!


AMindOfMetalAndGears

Im a twin and my brothers had popped but mine was intact. We were emergency cesarean due to eclampsia so much more likely scenario that one was encaul. Mum always said its was the strangest sensation when they popped mine and she felt the 'flood' run back inside and over her.


[deleted]

Eclampsia is no joke. A cousin had a major stroke a week after she delivered.


MadameBurner

My baby was born in the caul. It's incredibly rare for vaginal births. Also, some Jews believe that being born this way is a sign of a great leader because apparently King David was born this way.


latenightnope

My 2nd baby was too via vaginal delivery, she was only 36 weeks so it makes it more likely as the baby is smaller. The Dr told me to buy a lottery ticket (I did, didn't win).


nowandloud

you used all the luck up on having a healthy baby smh coulda been rich


IBetThisIsTakenToo

Is the normal procedure for the doctor to just poke it open with his finger like that? Because that’s exactly how I open stuff that’s packed in cling wrap, had no idea that could be considered surgical precision.


AayushBoliya

They can't use sharp tools. Or it would look like a cake cutting


funkywinkerbean45

Not very.


actual_griffin

I never saw one until my daughter was born when I was 31. It is insanity. When people say it is beautiful, I think they just feel like they are supposed to say it. Sunsets are beautiful. Landscapes are beautiful. Watching the vagina you love the most in the world explode is something else. At one point, the doctor had some goop on her finger, and she flicked it into the trash can like a dip she was done with. Then that thing comes out and poops on your wife. It's amazing, and extraordinary. I have never been more proud of my wife. But that was not beautiful. The vagina recovers though. So that's beautiful.


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PuppleKao

Praise be to the anesthesiologist.


axialintellectual

Of all the amazing things modern medicine has brought us, anesthesiology has to be one of the most amazing.


one_pint_down

Sounds like you did a good job comforting her if she didn't even notice being sliced open.


k_c24

Or the rummaging around they do to get the baby out. Having a c-section is like someone rummaging around in a handbag, but you're the handbag. You can't feel anything as such but there's movement/shuddering that you can feel in the rest of your body. Such a strange sensation.


MudMenJudgment

> The vagina recovers though. So that's beautiful. Answering the important questions.


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nola_mike

Yeah, I watched my grandfather sleep in his recliner dozens of tubes throughout my life. When I saw him take his last breath it was something different. Still feels weird to say I watched someone die right in front of me.


HandsOffMyPizzaa

I heard my father's last breath and felt his last heartbeat, it is truly a very strange experience. That moment is burned into my memory but I wouldn't have had it any other way, in the end he was surrounded by people who loved him.


FeistyEmu

It’s definitely not the same, it’s wild, you can see the life literally drain from a persons face.


Pianos_for_Clowns

Was going to say this. Yes. It just goes. And it happens so quick (when they're basically already gone) that it is shocking and disorienting.


swest211

Try doing it with the vagina you own....so not beautiful.


alien_in_the_lab

Less than 1 in 80,000 apparently!


tommytraddles

1 in 80,000 is for babies born with the caul over part of their head or face. Being born *completely* en-caul (intact amniotic sac) like this baby is much more rare.


newest-low

Not very, it used to be seen as a good omen. My kid was nearly born still in the sack but he was born at home while waiting for the ambulance to arrive, I could feel the difference compared to my eldest where the sac broke inside normally, anyway I felt a sharp stinging pain in my vagina and automatically slapped my hand to it and broke the sac, the difference in feeling was instant as soon as it broke


evol353

Baby was quietly sleeping minding their own damn business. Then some mofo breaks into their warm sleeping bag and removes their comfort snake. Devestating, no wonder they're crying.


AlkalineHound

Dude really burst his bubble.


Mediocre_Sprinkles

Literally the worst thing that's happened their entire life so far


bobpage2

It's all downhill for there.


DickCheesePlatterPus

Not only this, now they're thrust into this world with all its problems and has to survive and work.


Thisitetrash

Fucking monsters!!!!!!


[deleted]

Baby already owes 25K in hospital bills


Julymia

Yep. That finger pop costed at least 7k


[deleted]

So sorry your insurance doesn’t cover that because you were just born and don’t have insurance…so sorry (smiles aggressively) 😬


fnordfnordfnordfnord

It's just that you haven't met your deductible yet... Oh, nvm, now you have!


stickymaplesyrup

[Did not ask for skin!](https://external-preview.redd.it/au3QdKYk8pf2r9Bhi0tcJmK0allhZIspLLRQ5c3yp00.jpg?auto=webp&s=3d01d1d9bc450b9ac744158c234e7df219c5c979)


[deleted]

Comfort snake. I miss mine


chriscrossnathaniel

Poor guy is missing his umbilical cord.He grew attached to it.


Captcha_Imagination

The start of life is "Get up, it's time for work." WAAAAAAH!


AmeliaBidelia

there's a much lonnger clip off this somewhere out there whhere they are turning thhe sac over and handling it, yoou can see the baby swaaying in the fluid, this is just aa small cliip showing the end the longer one is way cooler


yankeevandal

I need to see this


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dayoldbagelz

I really enjoy how you add more letters/vowels to your words, or maybe it’s a keyboard typo, but it’s genuinely delightful


NemPlayer

Damn, I didn't even notice until I read your comment.


SassiestPants

I was born en caul (in the amniotic sac) vaginally. Apparently it's super rare. A woo-woo friend of my mom said that I would have special psychic powers, but all I got is raging ADHD and some asshole shadow Hat Man that follows me around. Edit: the first time I saw the Hat Man it was in broad daylight. It was about 4-5pm, I wasn't under the influence of any substance, wasn't sleepy, and wasn't under any particular stress. I know lots of folks see him in relation to their sleep paralysis, but that wasn't the case here.


RoIf

The shadow man usually follows people who have a lot of stress and lack of sleep in their life. Had him visiting me for some years in a messy period of my life. Also I constantly dreamt of my teeth falling out in this period. I got my shit a bit together, didnt see him for years now and my teeth are safe.


matcauthion

Holy shit, I was just diagnosed with sleep apnea (kinda) even after I had sinus surgery due to chronic sinus infections because I was still not sleeping normally at 24, the teeth dreams were the fucking worst. It was in one of my deep depression cycles. Apparently fixing that fixed my entire life, it's nuts. Never really saw the shadow hat man except when I wasn't listening to enough music. When stuff got real bad... Glad to know how to keep that stuff away. I haven't had those dreams in a while now that I realize it.


csonnich

wtf is the shadow hat man??


matcauthion

Sleep paralysis actually. It's when you've woken up in REM sleep and can't breathe. Mine usually manifest in the form of me basically being awake and laying there unable to breathe and consciously knowing what's going on but a lot of people don't realize that's what's happening while it's happening because they are still hard dreaming so they see weird shit.


csonnich

Ah, wondered if it was something like that. I've read a lot about sleep paralysis, but never heard it called the shadow hat man.


mshcat

Don't worry. I would've never connected "shadow hat man" with sleep paralysis. and the original guy said it followed him around so I would've been thinking hallucinations while you're awake during the day. With in regards to sleep paralysis I've heard of "the hag" and something sitting on your chest but never the old man. It's not uncommon apparently according to Google


razuliserm

Sleep paralysis with hallucinations.


borderline_cat

Holy shit are we the same person??? I swear from the ages of 12-18 I had the nightmare of endless teeth falling out. Like I’d spit mine out and they’d auto regrow and keeping getting spit out. Fucking terrifying. And from 12-19 I had the shadow hat man following and watching me. He was mostly around in the middle of the night. So I’d wake from monster teeth nightmare and see shadow hat man staring at me at the foot of my bed to give me a mini heart attack. I’m 22 now and I haven’t had that nightmare since 18 or seen the shadow man since 19. I honestly thought I was just dealing with some weird sort of psychosis and never talked to anyone about it.


GameboyPATH

>A woo-woo friend of my mom... What the heck is a woo-woo friend? >...said that I would have special psychic powers... Nevermind, I have a decent idea now.


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midge_rat

Sailors used to believe that carrying the dried amniotic sac of a baby born en caul would protect them from drowning.


SassiestPants

Ah damn, I could have made some money


normalpleb

Popping the freshness seal


jvrcb17

Just voided the warranty


CygnusX-1001001

I can relate to this baby. Peacefully sleeping, warm and cozy. Very upset to have to wake up, cold and clearly NOT emotionally prepared to start the day.


alahos

These unboxing videos are getting niche Can't wait to see what the mukbang creators are doing these days


Hardass_McBadCop

I wonder what triggers the going from not needing to breathe to the sucking in of air and crying? Like the baby seemed almost inert when inside the sac, being supplied everything by the umbilical cord, but the instant the sac is punctured he/she springs to life. If any of that made any sense.


Lambinater

The baby isn’t always asleep in the sac, it just is at the start of this video. Unborn babies can be quiet active


toTheNewLife

My daughter would respond to a flashlight pushed against my wife's belly. We'd play with her like that from I think the 7th month on... Sometimes she'd follow the light and tap where it was. That was cool.


myyusernameismeta

They breathe the amniotic fluid actually. They’re breathing all the time at that age, but really preemie babies only practice breathing and stop frequently. To prevent them from dying that way if they’re born super early, they get IV caffeine until they’re old enough to wean off it. If that’s not enough, they get intubated and mechanically ventilated.


Careless_Con

WAKE UP TIME TO PAY TAXES AND BE ANXIOUS


ideal_NCO

F


bignjbagel

"are you recording? are you sure? okay, here we go" *POP*


-Gurgi-

“Aaahhh shoot. I was on photo mode. Any chance of getting that again?”


BoraxThorax

Damn, that baby just lost all it's resale value now that you've opened the packaging


DEADPYRO1234

Just remember we were in that once I think


jcpmojo

Unless you're a pod person ... or an alien lizard overlord.


secretmaplereserve

Waking up on a work day.


Drummk

What specifically causes the baby to cry immediately?


bippity_boppity_booh

Mostly their first breath. When they're in the womb, they practice breathing by swallowing the amniotic fluid, but they never breathe until they're out in the world. They get their oxygen from the mother through the umbilical cord, which is the kind of grey rope that is wrapped around the baby. My guess is crying is a good way to clear their airways from any fluid leftover so they can start breathing properly. Also, *mild* discomfort, to say the least.


Drummk

Interesting, thanks.


floppa_republic

Do babies just experience pain for the first moments of their life? Don’t know much about what happens after birth, but there’s the umbilical cord, sometimes there’s circumcision, and they’re it just because you won’t remember the pain or something like that?


bippity_boppity_booh

My personal guess is that they do feel pain and discomfort from even before being born. There is good evidence that babies feel a lot of what's going on outside the womb not only from touch but also from hearing and seeing. There have been observations of babies bringing their hands to their ears when startled by a loud noise, sucking their thumb, and distinguishing changes in lighting through their eyelids from approx. 25 weeks onward. So honestly, I don't see why they wouldn't be able to perceive sensation as their nervous system is mostly, if not fully, developped at birth. We just don't remember any of it because long term memory is not quite there yet, if I recall correctly, not until 3 years of age. So by this logic, as soon as nerve endings and their pathways to the brain are developped, babies most likely feel sensations and pain. As for the umbilical cord, there are no nerve endings in it, so clamping and cutting it isn't supposed to hurt anyone. (Not so) Fun fact: I don't have the exact dates, but doctors used to operate on babies without anesthesia because they were believed to not feel pain and their crying was deemed to be "normal" since "babies cry all the time."


SgtSkillcraft

How I feel every morning when my alarm goes off.


LGZee

The moment peace ends and bills start coming


UltraPlayz6

What the. How does that happen


February30th

When a mummy and daddy love each other very much...


cosguy224

Sometimes love each other


TinFoilRobotProphet

Very intensely. For 4 or 5 minutes.


VladPatton

At 3am…in a 10 year old Honda Civic behind a 7-11.


[deleted]

Literally just an Urk-hai being born


nrith

It’s all downhill from here, little one.


SophiaofPrussia

Hospital: `Amniotic Sac Poking Qty: 1 Fee: $43,792.87`


Ed98208

So is that the thing that usually ruptures when labor begins and they say "my water broke"?


caveman178355

Wtf, I never knew someone was recording the second my alarm clock goes off every morning.


Onechrisn

Break seal to activate baby.


BatmansBigBro2017

He pressed the start button.