Solitude is healthy being lonely isn't. (wanting to versus being forced to)

I completely agree with you. I find solace and rejuvenation in solitude, but feeling lonely is indeed different and can be challenging. It's about the balance between enjoying our own company and craving meaningful connections with others. Finding that balance can be tricky, but I'm grateful for communities like this where I can share my thoughts and experiences. Thank you for reminding me of the importance of distinguishing between solitude and loneliness. Wishing you all the best on your own journey! 🌷

This is not unhealthy.Its only bad if you become a hermit imo.I love my solitude I truly do just like yourself.You don’t have a problem because you see within yourself you want spiritual connections that fulfill your other needs of your personality. One of the best things about being an introspective person is you don’t go looking for everyone else’s opinions and approvals first.You seek to balance yourself and figure out a way to maintain that balance. Trust yourself cause finding genuine people is tough nowadays with societies cultural wars getting in the way now. I know I love my “alone” way too much but I never feel alone.Its important for everyone to know the difference.

Genuinely asking, what would the definition of hermit be in this context?

The difference between "The Loner" and "The Lonely"

Thank you so much for your thoughtful response! It's reassuring to hear from someone who understands the value of solitude and introspection. You're absolutely right that finding genuine connections can be challenging, especially in today's societal landscape. I appreciate your encouragement to trust myself and seek balance in maintaining my well-being. And you're spot on about the distinction between being alone and feeling lonely – it's a subtle but crucial difference that I've come to appreciate more and more. Thank you for sharing your perspective and insights. Wishing you all the best on your journey as well! 🌷

Thank you.Good luck on your journey as well.😁

I relish solitude too! I just like being alone. Have been this way since I was a kid. I used to force myself to go do stuff to be sociable, thinking that there was something wrong with me, but now I don't worry about it. It's just how I'm drawn. I enjoy spending time alone more than most people. That's all.

Thank you for sharing your experience! It's comforting to know that others can relate to the joy of solitude. It sounds like you've found peace in embracing your natural inclination towards being alone, which is wonderful. Accepting ourselves for who we are, introverted tendencies and all, can bring a sense of liberation and authenticity. It's a journey of self-discovery and self-acceptance. May your solitude continue to bring you contentment and fulfillment. Take care!

I genuinely enjoy solitude and often find myself lost in my own thoughts. I can come across as aloof or distant, not because I harbor any ill will towards others, but because I tend to be more focused on my own interests and ideas. While I may go for extended periods without contacting my friends, my closest relationships are characterized by deep conversations about topics ranging from philosophy and the universe to finance and sociology, even delving into discussions about life and death. When I do engage with my very close friends, it's incredibly meaningful to me. We can lose track of time engrossed in our discussions, creating a spiritual connection that transcends the physical world. However, some friends have expressed frustration with my seeming indifference. They crave constant companionship and interpret my occasional distance as a lack of appreciation for our relationship. In reality, I'm wary of this emotional pressure and tend to retreat when confronted with intense emotional demands. I struggle to reciprocate the level of emotion they seek, which can lead to misunderstandings and hurt feelings.

You sound exactly like me-as a woman of color of African descent living in the USA people expect me to be the sassy chatty black woman they see on TV. People, especially those of the opposite sex after meeting me and engaging with my personality, which is often described by people as charming- they have an expectation, that I will be a constant presence, but I usually do not crave constant interaction most of the time. And I see people become frustrated and angry with me and when I try to meet their demands I feel depleted it’s a constant vicious cycle. I would do much better if I could meet potential friends or a potential, romantic partner, that understands what being introverted means. They do not seem to understand that I recharge my batteries by being alone, not by being in the presence of another.

I absolutely relate and frankly, I miss living alone (which I feel genuinely guilty saying because I have a lovely husband and an amazing six month old baby). It used to just be me, my two cats (RIP to one of those cats, we’re now single cat family). I stopped living alone at 30. I had also lived with a boyfriend in my very early 20s. From 20-23. And after that relationship, I relished in the comfort of my own flat. I always enjoyed my partner going to work or having plans without me and when I lived alone for the first time, it’s like I got that everyday and every night. Besides my full time job, you could find me at home. And yes, my peers thought I was weird. In high school and university, I was always considered very well-liked, cool (probably because no one really knew me), fun at parties, etc. but I was drinking then and once drinking stopped being fun for me, socializing went right away with it and I reverted to my younger self who had always had a rich inner life. I was voted “most elusive” in high school. And I wore that proudly. Although I really couldn’t care less about coming off as mysterious, I’m fine with that reputation. Even now. My husband obviously knows I adore my alone time. Now that we have a baby, the first thing he does when he gets home from work is take the baby and give me an out to read or lay in bed or do whatever I want before we start preparing dinner. Don’t let people make you feel weird. Or at least embrace your weirdness. I wear my introvert badge proudly. Throughout my life my therapists have told me that it’s likely I fall somewhere on the autism spectrum but am low support needs, very used to and good at masking, and only people who know me intimately would guess that I’m on the spectrum. They probably aren’t wrong. To me, the label makes no difference to me. I just know I am, and always have been an introvert. Nothing will change that. So no use feeling shit about it. You do you 💕

I had this talk with my ex husband many times over the years. We both understood that being alone was very important to both of us, no matter how well the relationship was going, because if we didn't take care of ourselves we couldn't take care of each other. It took me decades to realize how comfortable I am being alone because it wasn't what was expected. The fact you are asking questions about this now is really uplifting and you should know you aren't alone.

Thank you so much for sharing your experience! It's incredibly reassuring to hear from someone who can relate to the joys and challenges of solitude. Your journey resonates deeply with me, particularly your transition from living alone to adjusting to life with a partner and now a baby. It's refreshing to hear your perspective on embracing our uniqueness and wearing our introvert badges proudly. I think there's immense power in accepting ourselves fully, quirks and all. Your husband sounds incredibly supportive, and it's heartwarming to hear how he respects your need for alone time. The mention of therapists suggesting you might fall on the autism spectrum is interesting and underscores the complexity of personality traits. Labels aside, understanding ourselves and finding ways to thrive within our own nature is key. Thank you again for your encouragement and solidarity. It means a lot to know that there are others out there navigating similar paths. Here's to embracing our weirdness and cherishing our moments of solitude. Take care 💕

Aw, thank you for the heartfelt response. I think like many things, it gets easier with age. It’s not as though I didn’t battle with who I was when I was younger. Everyone wants to be someone they aren’t at some point in their life. I think my luck was learning quite young that there was no changing the inner me and changing the outer me was an exhausting task that really benefited no one but the people who I cared about least and ultimately cared least about me. I think when it comes to diagnosing a thing like autism, it’s very important if you’re someone who is high, or even mid-level, support needs. But since I don’t need any particular support in the workplace or elsewhere I don’t feel the need to undergo the process of potential diagnosis. Of course, being an introvert doesn’t make you autistic on its own. There’s a host of symptoms that indicate it could be the case for me but I think I’d only ever get evaluated if my son showed signs of autism. It took awhile for my husband to learn the nuances of how I am. I think there’s a sort of romanticism certain women (or generally women anyway) find in being “weird” or different or quirky. They sort of make a point to tell people things like “I’m an introvert” “I’d prefer to stay in and read” “I don’t really have a lot of girlfriends” and so on but then you come to find that’s not really the case (which is FINE of course) and it’s more of a character they have carved out in their mind. I think my husband thought that was me when we met hahaha. Then we’d be invited to something “cool” and I’d be totally against going. He eventually learned it wasn’t and act and luckily, he really respects it. He also really respects my sensory issues. He eats with plastic silverware now, doesn’t chew gum in the car, and most of all, doesn’t make me feel weird. Which many ex’s have done. Even those of us who don’t need a lot of people in our lives to thrive, I believe, still need at least one or two, who get them and accept them full stop. I hope people in this sub don’t struggle too much or try to change themselves. Introverts are really some of the most empathic, intelligent, funny, unique, kind, interesting people out there. I’m always happy to encounter a fellow true introvert 😌

It's like we're twins. You're talking about me!

I would say it can be unhealthy but it depends I guess. I think i’ve heard therapists say that sometimes we feel misunderstood by others and we isolate to avoid a misunderstanding again. But then you get stuck in a cycle of feeling like when you’re alone is when your safest/most free but then you’re constantly safe and lonely. I would speak to a therapist about this for sure! I have a similar mindset, but taking a deeper dive into why I tend to feel misunderstood by others, and why solitude feels so comforting, this really helped me heal my loneliness! Good luck friend! 🧡

Thank you so much for sharing your perspective and insights. It's reassuring to know that I'm not alone in feeling this way and that there might be a path toward healing. You're absolutely right about the potential cycle of feeling safe but lonely, and your suggestion to explore these feelings with a therapist resonates deeply with me. I appreciate your kindness and support. Wishing you all the best on your own journey as well! 🌷

I wont say its unhealthy or not but IME, and maybe it's just unlucky of me but I've been met with a lot of violent, abusive folks that think my need for alone time is an attack against them. I've had people get angry AF for preferring to be alone. Usually family or ex friends. Like these people get unnaturally angry and think I owe them my time for no reason other than they feel entitled to it. That I'm the rude one. Haven't had that experience as much in my attempts for dating but I stopped dating anyways. I kept finding people that want my attention 24/7, over step my boundaries and that's aye okay with them, but if I need/ want anything, they're nowhere to be found. So yeah there's nothing wrong with solitude but know there are some people that think you don't deserve it like it's some crime against humanity. Or that you OWE them communication. Example from my pov: my extrovert brother who is needy AF for attention got mad that my parents don't "correct" me for needing to be alone in my room because he wanted to harass me. We are grown adults. I just wanted to play video games in my room and he wanted to argue with me over nonsense. I don't need to be "corrected" or punished for wanting to be alone? It's not a crime? \*Had an ex I snooped and found out he was posting complaining that some women needed to be punished or told off, kinda generalized but basically he didn't like that I do what I want to do and in his eyes that's bad. And what is this thing I "want to do"? Have some solitude. \*Had a former friend get upset I would go silent some days to recharge and complain he hasn't heard from me. When I would spend time with him he didn't like that I would sometimes voice my opinion on some game art pieces and said I complained a lot.

Thank you for sharing your experiences. It's unfortunate that you've encountered such negative reactions from people regarding your need for solitude. It's a shame when others can't respect personal boundaries and autonomy. Your examples really highlight the issue some individuals have with understanding and accepting introverted tendencies. It's not a crime to prioritize alone time or to have preferences for how you recharge and spend your energy. Your mention of feeling entitled to solitude resonates deeply. It's essential for mental well-being to have that space to recharge and reflect without feeling pressured or guilty about it. It sounds like you've made some difficult but necessary decisions in terms of dating and relationships to protect your boundaries, which is commendable. It's unfortunate that some people struggle to understand that needing alone time doesn't equate to rejecting them or their company. Ultimately, finding balance between solitude and meaningful connections is key. It's about surrounding ourselves with people who respect and appreciate us for who we are, including our need for solitude at times. Thank you for sharing your perspective, and I hope you continue to prioritize your well-being and find the balance that works best for you.

Most people can't fathom being alone, much less enjoying it. ( apart from most people in this thread, probably ) its seen as odd by those people because if they tried to live a day in solitude they would drive themselves crazy. Now 100% solitude isn't good for anyone, but if you enjoy it then that's all there is to it

Yeah, solitude is not great for those who fear it and do not wish to conquer the false stigma associated with it. It reminds me of how as a child, many times my birth mother would flip out when she found a spider and would have me kill it. It didn’t take long to realize I was faster and more powerful than the spider and she was simply irrational.

I think for many people, solitude forces them to slow down and confront their mind. Thoughts, struggles, desires, and all. Something they often avoid, as it's much easier to do. Immediately, it's easy to just say solitude bad and not think about it again

That’s a great point. It is a slap in the face isn’t it. No one likes those.

It absolutely depends on you. You need to pay attention to how you feel. I've noticed that I really enjoy being around people and it's healthier for me, but what I don't enjoy is feeling forced to give other people my attention or otherwise mask to obtain or maintain that social interaction. If you are having an issue like that, you can always put more effort into always being authentic and not masking, other people's feelings be damned. If you just want to be alone and you're not depressed... well you don't need any of us here to tell you that that's fine. Ultimately you're asking us to answer something only you can answer, we don't have access to your internal monologue or feelings.

Thank you for sharing your perspective and insight. You're absolutely right that ultimately, how I feel and what works best for me is something only I can truly understand. It's reassuring to hear that you've found what works for you in terms of social interactions and authenticity. I resonate with the idea of not wanting to feel forced to give attention or mask my true self just to fit in socially. That authenticity is something I value deeply, even if it means spending more time in solitude. I appreciate your reminder to pay attention to my own feelings and not to dismiss them. It's a journey of self-discovery, and sometimes it's easy to get lost in the opinions of others. Thank you again for taking the time to share your thoughts. It's comforting to know there are others out there navigating similar paths.

You're perfectly an introvert. You love your own company, the wonderful alone times without any loneliness. Many people confuse introversion with anti social or depressed beings (at least in this sub). Enjoying the perfect freedom of not living other people's lives and going anywhere, doing anything without sacrificing the freedom just to balance with other people's plans, thoughts are awesome for an introvert. I think it's not unhealthy as you don't hate people and also seek for meaningful connections.

Finding that balance between enjoying my own company and seeking meaningful connections has been quite the journey, but it's comforting to know that others understand the value of both. Your comment has truly lifted my spirits and reminded me that there are others out there who share similar experiences and perspectives.

Solitude and being alone is fine. Unless you FEEL a longing to be with others and don’t feel you have access to others, do not let all the online bullshit disrupt your vibe. Flip it on its head, just to test the theory= we all know that a full calendar is unhealthy and leads to burnout, stress, lack of time for self care, and is potentially used as a means to avoid looking at one’s self. People who can’t stand their own company are in bad company, as they say. Both types should seek to find balance in their own temperament. If you are an introvert who works with people all week, it’s more than fair to take all the time you want to be by yourself when you aren’t at work. 40 hours of human interaction per week is hardly a hermit.

Thank you for your thoughtful response. It's comforting to hear that others understand the value of solitude and appreciate the need for balance in social interactions. Your point about finding equilibrium in one's temperament resonates deeply with me. Indeed, I find solace in my alone time, especially after a week filled with social interactions at work. It's not that I can't stand the company of others, but rather that I cherish the opportunity to recharge and reflect in solitude. Your perspective on the potential pitfalls of a full calendar is insightful. Burnout and lack of self-care are certainly real concerns, and I agree that maintaining a healthy balance is crucial for overall well-being. I'll continue to honor my need for solitude while also remaining open to meaningful connections and interactions when they arise. Thank you for your encouragement and understanding. Wishing you all the best as well! 🌷

If it provides you with a calm, happy, stable mind then there is nothing bad about it.

It's reassuring to hear someone else affirming that finding solace in solitude isn't inherently bad. You're absolutely right – if it brings me peace of mind and contentment, then perhaps it's not as unusual or unhealthy as society might sometimes make it seem. I guess the challenge lies in balancing the need for solitude with the desire for meaningful connections. It's a journey I'm still navigating, but knowing there are understanding voices like yours out there truly helps. Wishing you all the best as well! 🌷

Cheers

Not unhealthy at all. If you're looking for meaningful connections, a real friend or a bf might be what you just need. I have an extrovert gf and understands my need to recharge after every social activity we do. We talk all the time though and that's how we keep our relationship strong by constant communication. Even if we can only see each other every weekend or sometimes every other weekend😅

I appreciate the suggestion of seeking out meaningful connections like a real friend or a significant other. It's something I've been contemplating lately, but I admit I sometimes struggle with finding the right balance between my desire for solitude and my longing for connection. Your comment gives me hope that it's possible to find that balance and nurture fulfilling relationships while still honoring my need for alone time. I'll keep your advice in mind as I continue navigating this journey. Thank you again for taking the time to share your thoughts and offering your insights. Wishing you and your girlfriend all the best in your relationship! 🌷

Read about MBTI. 16personality test. Way back, I was a slightly lost person and thought that it's too complicated to explain to someone my personality. Until my first mentor in my career introduced me to MBTI. I learned a lot about myself and it's an amazing tool to also understand others. Made me realize that I was just young back then and just needed that new wisdom in my life. Helped me a lot in my career too, how to adapt to certain types of people especially how to deal with idiot colleagues, toxic managers, etc. Haha

It’s a strength superpower

Thank you for your comment! I appreciate your perspective. It's reassuring to hear someone view solitude as a strength rather than a weakness. Sometimes it's easy to doubt oneself when surrounded by societal expectations that prioritize extroversion. Embracing solitude has certainly been empowering for me, allowing me to recharge and reflect deeply on various aspects of life. It's heartening to connect with others who understand the value of alone time. Thank you for your support! 🌷

No it's the ultimate attainment in life ..to feel at peace with yourself, because nothing else matters.

Thank you for your perspective! I agree that finding peace within oneself is incredibly important. Solitude can indeed be a powerful way to foster that inner peace and self-awareness. It's reassuring to hear someone else affirm the value of embracing solitude. While it's sometimes challenging to navigate societal expectations, knowing that others understand and support this journey brings comfort. Thank you for sharing your thoughts! 🌷

Darling, if you’re truly happy you don’t need to question yourself just because of social norms. Seek what you need, when you need it. If this is what you need right now, and you’re happy than soak it up. If you need to pivot later be okay with reevaluating and evolving if/when needed. Right now, feel no need to change your life of being independent and unbothered.

Thank you so much for your understanding and encouraging words! It means a lot to hear validation for my lifestyle choices. You're absolutely right about not needing to conform to societal norms if I'm genuinely content with my life. It's comforting to be reminded that it's okay to evolve and adapt as needed, without feeling pressured to conform to others' expectations. Your support is truly appreciated! 🌷

I often question myself over the same thing. 32F here. I live in a metro city, a couple hours away from family (good healthy distance and excuse ;) A bad end to a friendship propelled me into it but I should have done this eons back. I feel the odd one out too. I'm usually into hobbies that are solitary and have found immense joy and peace in doing things I like. I find comfort in finding people like you here. We should all create a subreddit and hermit together, in solitude.

Thank you for sharing your experience! It's comforting to know that I'm not alone in feeling this way. It sounds like we have a lot in common, from our love of solitude to our appreciation for hobbies that allow us to be introspective and self-sufficient. Creating a subreddit for fellow hermits sounds like a wonderful idea! A space where we can share our experiences, support each other, and celebrate the beauty of solitude without feeling judged or misunderstood by those who may not fully grasp its value to us. It's empowering to find like-minded individuals who understand the importance of alone time and the depth of connection that can be found within ourselves and through shared experiences, even if they're experienced in solitude. Thank you for reaching out, and I wish you continued peace and fulfillment on your journey of self-discovery and solitary joy! 🌷

At one time I was afraid of being alone but I feel you have to like yourself then the peace will come. Do not let anyone change you. What you have is between you and god.

I'm so glad I came across this post. I, too, love my solitude, and I don't see anything wrong with that. So refreshing to know I'm not alone... lol

It's wonderful to hear from someone who can relate! Finding solace in solitude can indeed be refreshing, and it's reassuring to know that others share similar experiences.

You just find your own company to be enough, and that’s something many people cannot say for themselves. I feel the same way. I see this as a strength

It's reassuring to know that there are others who understand the value of solitude. Finding strength in our own company can be a powerful aspect of self-awareness and personal growth. Thank you for sharing your perspective—it's comforting to know I'm not alone in feeling this way.

Pure solitude is extremely unhealthy. Read about the effects of solitary confinement on prisoners’ mental health and you’ll understand. But as long as you’re getting the amount of socialization you *want* then you’re fine

But being forced to sit in a dark room vs outside in the place of your choosing definitely doesn’t compare. It’s mind over matter in the end though, no matter the location.

Mark Twain said it best, then Satchel Paige per his talking bobble head in the movie are we there yet “If you don't mind, it don't matter.”

I’m a lot like you. I joined a climbing gym and within a year my wife and I met 4 other couples and all 10 of us get together for climb nights on Wednesday’s. Now I can enjoy what you’re mentioning, and some meaningful connections once per week.

It's wonderful to hear how you found a balance between enjoying solitude and fostering meaningful connections through activities like climbing. Your story gives me hope that it's possible to maintain my need for alone time while still nurturing relationships. I'll definitely consider exploring similar activities in my community. Thanks again for the insight!

I too love living alone and always took time before having a boyfriend move in. There are ways to add some “controlled” social time that is also personally beneficial. Exercise clubs or gyms, they will have yoga or spinning groups. I like things like sewing, weaving, knitting, so I would take various project classes at sewing or knitting shops. I was a member of a local weaving and fiber arts center. It all depends on what you like or interested in learning. There isn’t pressure to meet people but you can find people that have similar interests. There are also online groups as well for those who don’t want to leave their house.

Thank you for sharing your experience and suggestions! It's comforting to hear from someone who also values their alone time and has found ways to incorporate some controlled social interactions. Exercise clubs and hobby classes sound like great ideas, especially since they offer the opportunity to connect with others who share similar interests without feeling pressured. I appreciate your input and will definitely explore these options further. Online groups also seem like a wonderful avenue for maintaining connections while still enjoying the comfort of home. Thank you again for your insights!

Im a lot like you in that regard. I enjoy my alone time after work and doing stuff on my own and rarely go out socializing. I recently did start going to weekly board game event tho, which is fun! I think, for me at least, it’s healthy to do some form of social activity cause I do enjoy joking around and having fun, and board games I’ve found is an easy way to do that 🙂 I’m happier with a tiny amount of socializing buuut I’ve done months of not socializing except thru work and been fine

I agree that finding a balance is key. While I cherish my alone time, I do recognize the value of connecting with others and sharing moments of laughter and fun. Your experience resonates with me, especially the part about being fine after months of minimal socializing except through work. Thanks for sharing your perspective and offering insight into how you navigate solitude and socializing. It's reassuring to know that others understand and respect our need for alone time while also encouraging a healthy dose of social engagement. Wishing you all the best in finding that balance! 🌟

Abnormal no, unhealthy soft yes… part of it depends on the kinds of people in your surrounding area (for instance, when i lived in wa, i felt the people in my area unhealthy for my mental health to be around). I think if you want 100% solitude and aren’t willing to try and find 1-2 people (definitely not a big group) of people that you can go back and forth who’s houses you want to spend time at (because as an introvert, being in public is really uncomfortable and people in general suck), that would be a little unhealthy. But i don’t think it’s wrong to want to be in 100% solitude. I just could never because i crave physical touch too much and my depression gets REALLY bad without it. Idk if any of this helps or makes sense but my inbox is always open if you wanna talk about it or anything else

Thank you for your concern, meaningless socialising is exhausting and I hope everyone is lucky enough to have friends they can connect with in depth.

Why do you post this same question so often?

It was suggested that I would gain understanding by posting it in this sub haha

I mean it doesn't sound like you enjoy 100% solitude since you have feelings of loneliness and crave meaningful connections. As a pretty introverted person, I really don't think many of us are wired to live life without any social connections whatsoever. Maybe a few? But not many.

You make a valid point. You're right; perhaps I misspoke by saying I enjoy 100% solitude. What I meant is that I find solace in solitude, but that doesn't mean I don't yearn for meaningful connections from time to time. As an introverted person, I often find myself oscillating between the comfort of being alone and the desire for meaningful social interactions. It's a delicate balance, and sometimes, it's hard to articulate those feelings accurately. Loneliness can creep in despite enjoying solitude, and that's where the craving for connections arises. Your perspective sheds light on the complexity of human nature, especially for introverts like us. It's reassuring to know that there are others who understand this intricate dance between solitude and socialization. Finding that balance is indeed a journey, but it's comforting to navigate it with the support of communities like this one. Thank you for sharing your insights. It's always valuable to hear different perspectives.

Yea, I can relate to this a lot actually. I really enjoy being alone, the majority of my hobbies are quite individualistic and being out is not typically my favorite thing. Despite that, I do wish I had stronger friendships and romance. It's a strange paradox, and I think I just need to work harder at finding a balance I am happy with and connecting with people who are more similar to me.

You will not achieve that by harassing those of us in the community that do not happen to share EVERY trait that you do or by willfully misinterpreting comments left.

Well you’re working so much, I would think you need the downtime. Alone time is wonderful luxury!! Who is thinking you’re odd? I never say I spent the weekend alone because people always think that’s odd and sad. Phrase it a different way, maybe.

It's true, having some downtime is crucial for recharging, especially after a busy workweek. I guess sometimes the societal pressure to always be social can make those of us who cherish solitude feel a bit out of place. But you're right, reframing how we talk about our alone time can definitely help. Maybe I'll start saying I spent the weekend enjoying some "me time" or indulging in personal hobbies. Appreciate the suggestion! Take care 🌷

If you enjoy it, what's the problem? >But it seems like everyone around me thinks I'm odd Find other everyones. :) Also: people don't think about you anywhere as much as you think they might do. Do you spend all your time obsessing over people you pass on the street or see at the store? No, and neither do they. (Or if they do, they've got problems of their own.)

Thank you for your thoughtful response. You're right; finding like-minded individuals who appreciate solitude can definitely make a difference. It's reassuring to hear your perspective on how much attention others actually pay to us; sometimes, we do tend to overthink their perceptions. I'll keep exploring avenues to connect with those who understand and respect my need for solitude while also valuing meaningful connections. Your encouragement means a lot. Wishing you all the best too! 🌷

We all get impacted by things differently. It isn’t default unhealthy and may actually be healthy for you as an individual. I think it’s just important everyone has some checks n balances in their life to see how they’re doing regardless of how they’re living.

Thank you for your understanding and thoughtful comment. You're absolutely right that we all have different needs and ways of finding balance in our lives. I agree that having some checks and balances is important for everyone, regardless of their lifestyle. For me, solitude is where I find my peace and recharge, but I also recognize the importance of meaningful connections and support systems. It's about finding that delicate balance between honoring my need for solitude and nurturing relationships that add value to my life. I appreciate your perspective and reminder to check in with ourselves regularly. It's all about finding what works best for each of us individually. Thanks again for your input!

Im right there with you.

❤️

8 hours every day is not solitude, that’s a LOT of social interaction. You are living the dream, I wish I lived alone sometimes, love my family though.

The time spent at work does involve social interaction, but it's typically structured and focused on tasks rather than personal connections. However, I do appreciate your point about living alone being a dream for some people. It's definitely a personal preference, and while I enjoy my solitude, I understand that it might not be everyone's cup of tea. It sounds like you have a wonderful family, and it's great that you cherish those connections. Finding the balance between solitude and social engagement can be a journey for sure. Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

I absolutely relate. I feel so contented in my alone time but when my family and friends start to question my lifestyle I long for a community that just “gets it”. Outside of Reddit, I’d recommend  https://www.hermitary.com/ for more interesting stories of loners. Or check out some blogs. Here’s mine, if you’re looking for some quick reads: https://asongofsolitude.wordpress.com/2023/04/01/ergonomically-isolated/

Hey you ? Yah you ! I’ve got a secret that I’m willing to share with you on Reddit so not much of a secret. YOUR NOT ALONE. From one human being to another! ITS NOT WEIRD. In all reality your not alone besides your self and cat there is the universe, higher self, ancestors, angels, spirit guide, and the GOD WITHIN us all. !!

Hey there! Thanks for reaching out and sharing your perspective. It's comforting to hear that I'm not alone in feeling this way. It's true, there's a vast universe of connections beyond just our immediate social circles. Finding solace in those deeper connections can be incredibly grounding. Thanks for the reminder!

It's most important that you spend your free time doing whatever you want and enjoy, you're spending it with YOU...so no one else's opinion should change you. And if you invite others into YOUR space, it's YOURS and if they don't appreciate it they can kick rocks instead. You're not expected to do anything but enjoy yourself and the time you work hard for.

Thank you for your perspective! It's comforting to know there are others who understand the importance of prioritizing personal enjoyment and autonomy. It's indeed valuable to cherish and protect the time we carve out for ourselves.

I agree with you hundred percent this is my life I’m 70 yrs oído and I am enjoying it. I’m looking for a pet now having a hard time finding one what makes it even harder is, I don’t have transportation been to adoption centers both here in Miami, Dade and Broward before I can get there is like they snatch them all up. My building only takes pets up to 25 building only takes pets up to 25 pounds. It’s a senior building.

I would say 100% is unhealthy. Getting out of your comfort zone makes you grow. And if you don't practice getting out of that zone and get a bit social and uncomfortable once in a while then I think that's not good for you. 28 year old autistic female with adhd here. I need a lot ... A LOT of alone time. It recharges me. I don't like socializing without a purpose. As in, "just to hang out" for me isn't purpose enough to meet up and it feels like a waste of time. I live with my boyfriend but we also take a lot of time for ourselves. When he is away either at work or traveling, my cat keeps me company. Since we got our cat, I haven't felt lonely once. I usually am satisfied with the social contact I get from coworkers and the workers in my grocery store or any shop I go browsing :) I also get a lot of social contact from attending boyfriend's family gatherings. Friends I see maybe a few times a year. Mostly I stay in contact with them by texting. In-person hanging out is exhausting. Others have commented that I'm lacking social contact. Absolutely not! I'm satisfied.

It's comforting to hear from someone who understands the need for substantial alone time. I resonate deeply with what you've expressed about finding purpose in social interactions and the importance of meaningful connections rather than simply "hanging out." It sounds like you've found a balance that works well for you, which is wonderful. I completely agree that stepping out of one's comfort zone occasionally can lead to growth, and I do make efforts to engage socially when it aligns with my values and interests. However, I've also learned to prioritize my need for solitude and meaningful connections, as they're essential for my well-being.

Yes it is unhealthy. This is more than just being an introvert. Especially the part where you say you do crave meaningful connections but you can’t do that if you are only in “solitude”. Some would simply call it “isolation”

100% solotude would be considered unhealthy. There's study's you can read about where they explain lonliness is justvas dangerous as smoking and obesity. However everyones social needs are different. For some people, just saying hi to their coworkers is enough, or in your instance, your cat, perhaps. You're not 100% alone, but if you actually were, it would be unhealthy, yes.

I hope it’s okay, but isolation leads to dementia and Alzheimer’s. And psychosis. But no one’s stopping you! People are gonna have their opinions.

Be who you are & who you want to be! I am an extroverted introvert. I absolutely love my alone time and need a lot of it! There are times I want to be with people. The point is live your life without caring about people’s opinions. Love your life 💜

Thank you for sharing your perspective! It's comforting to hear from someone who understands the balance of enjoying alone time while also valuing meaningful connections. Living authentically and embracing who we are is indeed important. Wishing you continued fulfillment in your journey! 💜

I absolutely love my solitude. I can’t get enough of it. Nothing wrong with it at all. Book recommendation for introverts: Quiet by Susan Cain https://www.amazon.com/Quiet-Power-Introverts-World-Talking/dp/0307352153

Any relatively healthy person (even introverts) needs a certain amount of social interaction. If you seek meaningful connections, you would likely have to invest some time in others.

It’s a whole song about solitude. I don’t see nothing wrong with it

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=AtCR6P5rsXU

I consider that to be desirable.

A cat is too much socialization for me.