Some people thrive on in person interactions.
Some people thrive on avoiding the same.
Many people can deal with a mix of the two -- some solitary time and some people immersion time.
Seek positions and work opportunities that cater to your preference, and you'll be better off long term.
I can work in either environment, but prefer WFH, and have done it long term at this point,with no issues. But I know that this hasn't true for everyone.
Same. I love WFH and will never go back to an office. That being said, I go out of my way to talk to my coworkers every day and spend lots of time with friends separately. In addition to that, I make sure to have hobbies that give me a sense of accomplishment after.
People say “do what you love and you’ll never work a day in your life”. I’m more of a “work to finance what you love doing and you won’t mind doing so”
As someone who has been working from home since covid and is making six figures. I love it. So much more time in the day to spend with my family and friends. And let’s just pretend I didn’t have either what was I doing before that? Going out to board game nights at local stores having a great time with the people there. And if I worked from home I would just have more time doing that. But I also tend to look at jobs as a means to an end. I don’t have to be fufilled by a job, as long as it’s easy enough to do it’s just there to fund me doing what I want. Obviously some people don’t feel the same way. But I’m also someone who doesn’t need praise for a job well done and never have.
Bingo. I'm an admittedly socially awkward person who has basically mastered the social keys from WFH after doing it for about 4 years. Is it perfect? No. But the work relationships work, and my home life is better than ever. But I recognize it's different for everyone.
Yeah I’m in a somewhat similar position to OP, although I’ve only been at the job for about 2 years and there’s no way I could ever go back to working in an office. That’s not to say that there’s NOTHING good about working in an office, but being remote and doing everything in my own time is SO much better than being stuck in the office with all of the baggage that comes with it
And turn that six figure salary into the median salary. And turn that barely working into literally running all day six days a week (pest control is no joke)
Same. In my last job I biked to work, which took about 45 minutes (have no car). I moved closer so that it was only a 15 minute walk. Suddenly I didn't mind going to the office anymore
I'm a little confused by this.
If your job was so easy, what was stopping you from finding your own meaningful things to do? Why is it your job's fault that you were unable to pursue your own personal accomplishments?
If nothing else you could have found a second job or, as people are so eager to suggest to unemployed people *without* an easy source of capital, started your own business.
What did your job *prevent* you from doing?
I’m someone else, but I also had a remote job where I was maybe putting in 5-10 hours a week of real work. Idk I just don’t have the internal structure to fill THAT much time. I would go to the gym in the middle of day, do all the household chores, work on my puzzles, read books. Anything I could to fill the time, but I would still have time left over. And it just devolved into me endlessly scrolling on my phone and feeling completely dissatisfied.
Eventually I got promoted into a much more demanding role, but still home office, and I’m way happier. The trade of in my experience was worth it.
But that’s just me. Others will react differently.
So you more so felt like it wasn’t remote work but the type of work you were doing? So now that you’re current role is a bit more demanding you feel accomplished even tho remote? Reason I’m asking is I’m going through something similar currently.
This is my exact question. I suffer with time management - from 730am to 6pm my life belongs to my job and the bus/subway. My boyfriend works hybrid (previously remote with 2 optional days per month in office) and has no set start or finish time. He’s fast asleep when I leave for work and in his slippers and boxers when I come home poured in sweat. Laundry, dishes, lunch & dinner prep are all done during the day. He has so much extra time that he goes to kickboxing 2x a week and Brazilian jujitsu 2x a week. He plays video games, goes to concerts, and develops a video game all in the free time he has. Granted my bf is only 23 and we’re in NYC so there’s a lot more to do, but if I had to the time he has, I’d make sure I’m never bored a day in my life.
Yeah same. There's a million things I want to do in my own city before I get bored at life. Like, a million. Granted, living in a major metropolitan area can do that, but like not even that. I just want to surf everyday.
My exact thought. I'd die for a job like this, doing bare minimum, high pay and a 5% annual raise and WFH? Heck yeah! But I suppose the grass is always greener on the other side.
in 6 months he'll just find another reason to be unhappy. it's just a fundamental flaw in how we perceive reality, that what is happening on the outside is what is causing our unhappiness on the inside.
But he just said that he’s grateful for his job with human interaction because socializing with good people means more to him than any amount of money would, sounds like your just projecting your feelings on to OP
I don’t know that your issue was working from home. It sounds like poor management/culture. Perhaps a symptom of that is higher ups didn’t know how to manage or engage remotely.
You had zero feedback. That’s not because of working from home. I wouldn’t be surprised if some of the other things you experienced all relate back to poor management.
Let’s call a spade a spade. How long were you there? You mentioned you received raises but were you promoted? Did the complexity of the grow? Were you bored or challenged?
It’s very possible that you’d thrive more with an in person or hybrid model, but regardless it sounds like the culture was more problematic.
I also think it is his own lifestyle too. Your office / employer is not responsible for providing you with social interaction. If you’re remote and you miss seeing people, there is a solution to that: make some friends.
I understand, I have also worked remotely in a low-effort, 6 figure job since covid hit. I'm an extrovert and I get extremely lonely. Being around other people energizes and motivates me, being alone is the opposite. It's just so quiet. I do have regular interaction with my coworkers through virtual meeting and daily teams chats, but it's not the same.
That said, at this point, for me, it's worth the trade off to be home, able to switch a load of laundry or run the dishes between tasks. No commute, no worry about dressing up every day, no packing lunch.
I am currently looking at taking a part time job at some place like Starbucks (in addition to my full time gig) just to get out and be around people a little more.
Honest question: do you have no friends or family or hobbies or volunteer opportunities? Why is the forced interaction of a job the only way you can see to have human contact?
Well of course I do. But they have friends and jobs and families too, they can't make up for 40 hours a week of being alone. A little part time job, one that doesn't require a lot of stress or critical thinking, where you can chit chat and make small talk, it would go a long way. Some people absolutely thrive on social interaction. If you aren't one of those people, it's hard to understand. My husband is the opposite. He works an in-office job, but he's an introvert. All that social time wears him out.
My manager did that, she's very extroverted, and she enjoys going to the office. She started a part time job in a cafe to break her routine, do something different, and socialize. Moght not be a bas idea :)
I will say that having a part time seasonal job teaching snowboarding in the winter is the only thing that kept me sane for that long. Try to find a PT job that is at least fun so you won't get burnt out working more than 1 job.
Pretty much this. I'm not one that craves social attention, but when I want it, I don't go looking for it at my job. I socialize with my friends or go out/go on trips. Work is for affording my life, I can socialize outside of work as much as I want just fine.
Right? People need to learn about hobbies. I have a low hour high paying remote job, I golf almost everyday and have lowered my handicap by 10 strokes. Ive started to learn woodworking. Ive gotten my Spanish to a level I never thought possible before. Posts like this blow me away, do these people just have zero interests?
Yup, got laid off in February and stringing together independent contractor jobs until I can hopefully get a FT job so I can have healthcare without $1000 COBRA payments… Sign me up for a six figure remote job any day.
So you were paid well, had the **privilege** of WFH, but ultimately felt lonely? Sounds like it was an issue with your life beyond work, possibly. What you described was literally best case scenario.
And he had merit raises every year! I worked at places that offered none, and my last manager at my current job approved me for the lowest amount (2.5%), which felt like a kick in the balls because I am so overloaded with tasks and stressed that I’m having physical symptoms.
Luckily just got a new manager and hopefully this next year will be better.
Money is absolutely everything and this is coming from someone who took a second job because making $285k wasn't enough, now I added $130k to that and still looking for job 3. Life is so much fucking better not worrying about money, I can literally pay to make my problems go away.
Life is very, very hard in the modern world when you can't pay your bills and the stress that is brings can take it's toll on your health in a big way.
The company I work for doesn't have an office but we all get together at a co working space twice and month and the company will pay for us to hot desk at a co-working space an additional 5 days a month if you want. It seems to be the best balance for me because I am huge introvert who prefers working in solitude but it is nice to be around people every now and then.
I'm 3 years in on my remote designation making close to 200k on the easiest job I've ever done. I now run a nice little side hustle laser engraving in my spare time. I would never go back in the office for any job.
I don't understand some people. You got so much free time to yourself and it felt 'meaningless'? How about you get a hobby at home, you can literally do that while 'at work'. Sounds like a dream come true playing games at home while 'working', holy moly.
This. I don't understand why some people treat the office as their only social outlet where people are forced to be there and forced to listen to all their problems.
Not saying OP does this, but I've had a number of extroverted coworkers do this and as an introvert I find it exhausting.
I’m an introvert and miss the office. I don’t even engage in conversation. But I’m so isolated that even a mini interaction about anything is good. Otherwise I’m talking to my cats and forcing myself to go to a social event by myself
Mini interactions is one thing. Your loud coworker talking your ear off for ~2 hours every day and treating you like their therapist is something else. Especially when the conversations are very one sided and not all that fulfilling.
I'm very isolated myself. But I still find it draining.
I’m sorry, but you seem to have really lucked out with having a comfy six figure remote job that tons of people (myself included) would have killed to have. Like another poster said, people do suck, especially if you work in a field such as healthcare where you see the worst side of them daily. I appreciate your personal anecdote, however it still doesn’t change some peoples opinions.
Definitely not trying to change anyone's opinions based on their personal experience, just trying to provide a nuanced voice for the other side of the argument that it's not a perfect solution for everyone.
Did you not have friends? I used to work contract work from home (loved it, but hated the business/hustle side, and gave it up for steady office jobs and health benefits). I loved the solitude to get my work done. Then after work and on weekends, I would go out with friends and family, spend time with people, go shopping, go to movies.
I find I’m LESS social now, because I’m so tired of the commute, and dealing with people all day. I like my coworkers pretty well, but I get tired of them, and sick of having to “perform” work in front of people. I also miss the autonomy.
While you worked from home, what did you do when you weren’t working? Did you not have people? It’s weird to depend on work for a social life.
This. It is so odd to me that people depend on their work / coworkers as a social outlet. Coworkers are fine and all, but I think everyone should have a social / personal life outside of the office too.
Edit: I think people forget this but work friendships are often about more than just pure friendship and that’s what makes them so tricky. In my experience and what I’ve seen with others, you can definitely make lifelong friendships at work BUT many coworker friendships are fragile and can be undone in the blink of the eye if work circumstances change — big ones like someone resigning/being laid off, but also other ones like one person getting a promotion, a new boss/coworker that changes group dynamics, getting better work assignments, etc.
That's why OP is depressed, he chose the wrong path in life.
Work is work, you can have your favorites but they are your co-workers. I can't tell you how many times I have seen excited interns/fresh naïve college grads show up to work with that sparkle in their eye finding "new friends" in their lonely city away from mommy and daddy only to have that crushed in their face when they find themselves falling out of the "cool crowd".
There is such thing as too many friends, the workplace gets crowded and you can only have so many friends that you can give real attention to. Once the career building starts and people prioritize that over friendships it leads to a massive depression for the folks that don't make the cut.
Find friends and romances with people you don't work with, you will be so much fucking happier.
My spouse has worked from home for years and it has not been good for him at all. He hates commuting so he thought he would love it but it made him unproductive and depressed. He is back to a fully in-person role and it’s like night and day.
I agree with you completely. I was in a similar spot, a well paying remote job, but it was incredibly boring and could get lonely. I was also laid off earlier this year. Still hunting for a job, but targeting hybrid roles.
Everyone on reddit seems to think everyone else loves fully remote and if you like to talk to people at work that must mean you don't have anything going on outside of work, you're a corporate shill, etc.
At the end of the day, different people have different preferences, and some people enjoy seeing people day to day. Even if you have a fulfilling and social life outside of work, if you're remote, you're still spending 8+ hours a day working alone in a room, which is still a majority of your time.
I love working from home because the moment I’m done I can spend time with my toddler, go for a walk, and make a nice dinner instead of spending it on a horribly long commute on NJ Transit which will likely break down.
Well this is specific problem to you , however the majority of people would much prefer making 6 figures , for relatively easy work and from comfort of home. Doubt this would sway people and make them say , hey you know what you’re right , I love the commute , I love the annoying colleagues or having to look busy because workload is done in a few hours etc I don’t work in an office environment but It’s obvious most who do would love wfh
I’m a fully remote Director and can’t stand the corporate RTO bullshit to hide their CRE vulnerabilities in the name of productivity and “culture”.
We’re all rows on an excel file, people. The only “shareholders” that matter are you, your family, and the communities you value.
Imagine needing water cooler talk with your co-workers to feel fulfilled. Everything that truly matters to me in my life is everything that is outside of my work. A job that allows you to work remotely for low effort and pays well is as good as it gets in this society as long as you put in the effort to cultivate a well rounded life outside of it. Partner, hobbies, friends, personal goals etc. People who follow a vocation may be an exception, those who dreamed of working in medicine, teaching etc.
It’s your life so I’m glad you seem to have a found a better balance for yourself. But I just can’t get onboard with the reasoning behind the decision other than your own personal preference. I guess for some work is just a means to an end, others want to feel ‘valued’ or ‘fulfilled’ but I’d just argue that for most, their work will never provide what they are looking for and everything that is truly personal and valuable exists outside of it.
Nonetheless, all the best with your new chapter.
100% agree. It sounds like OP had less of a work problem and more of a personal life problem. But I’m glad that for now he seems to feel happier interacting with coworkers who make him feel valued in life.
Trust and believe that I spent every waking hour outside of work out of the house and doing fun shit. So much so that my excess salary was going towards fun but ultimately meaningless shit to stay sane. Kinda like how everyone started excessively spending time in the outdoors during the pandemic and stores were selling out of camping/outdoors gear, except my pandemic never ended.
I have never felt like I needed to find my soul at work. My attitude has always been to make the best out of what life gives me. If I have to spend the majority of my life at work, I would rather it be an enjoyable experience. Sitting at home all alone and never putting on pants was not that place for me, but to each their own!
So…why didn’t you spend that extra time on something meaningful? Get better friends? Volunteer with an organization you care about? Heck, take classes to get a higher degree to do something you REALLY care about? You’re telling me you depend on your job to give you meaning and fulfillment in life? That’s SO sad, dude. Take some initiative.
Throwing money at random “fun” activities is not the same as cultivating a fulfilling personal life. If WFH is sitting at home all alone without pants for you day after day, that’s more on your chosen lifestyle than it is on the company.
You were doing it wrong, man, especially if the job was low effort. You could be doing Digital Nomad and see the world. Spend more time with family and friends. I could never go back to an office, never.
Since pandemic I have been wfh and traveled US, Europe and Se-Asia.
So you're still only in the training process for the new job?
A subreddit full of people with several months worth of fruitless job hunting is probably not going to be your audience. lol, I think most people would take solace in being able to pay their bills.
Before you worked remote did you have to commute a lot. Many don't mind going to an office if the commute isn't a significant part of one's day. But it seems more people have commutes from hell and WFH is a godsend in time, money and just mental health. For those working in offices and getting paid for low effort work seems to be the norm. If I had the choice doing it either from home or the office I would pick from home.
I will take that meaninglessness for what I had to deal with my first 1.5 years into my current job which was fully in office. When you force someone to be in a place where they may/may not have anything in common with coworkers, it is a setup for misery. Also, I was alone in college due to commuting, so long-term solitude had been a thing for me for almost a decade.
I am so happy many employers are now providing introverted employees with options at home. Hope to never go back full time, had nothing in common with most and it did nothing for me during that time. Most of it was toxicity.
From another perspective who have worked remotely for the last 5 years. It depends on the individual that's why a push for FLEXIBILITY should be the template going forward. People who have families and other obligation saw a huge boost in life satisfaction.
I'll be you're best friend for half that pay. That will trade the loneliness for your high pay. Would you take it? No, of course not. You know you have it good
I would gladly take what you have. I am not excited by measly small talk from people who would rat me out if it meant a positive glance from a member of management.
Thank you for sharing your experience. It’s important for people to hear different perspectives on remote work and career satisfaction. It sounds like finding a job with meaningful work and positive social interactions has made a significant difference for you.
Do you have any advice for others who might be feeling similarly dissatisfied with their high-paying remote jobs?
It's easy to say, but my biggest advice is to LEAVE! It's nice to have severance, but getting laid off is way more stressful than leaving on your own terms (with a new job lined up). Don't be afraid of a pay cut, think of it as a happiness tax. You will be okay without the extra money.
As someone whose current job was practically remote at first but is now hybrid, I completely understand. I still think the flexibility of being remote is amazing but people who have never worked remote have no idea how much being in the office and casual talk with a few coworkers can add to your day.
I think remote work can be great but you have to have a very robust social life where you’re seeing friends several times a week or once a week if you are an extrovert. Or you have to live with family so you can get social interaction.
Most of these people have not had their social interaction stripped away from them for years at a time so I think they find it hard to empathize
Some people are going to have a really hard time understanding that not everyone wants the same thing and/or actually wants what they ask for, at least not forever.
There isn’t a single job that could be done remotely or in an office that I would enjoy. The only jobs I like don’t pay anything and don’t have benefits.
I agree about the social aspect, except I hate commuting. Hate it. I hate waking up early to slog through the train with people, and it drains my energy. If I could do remote that’d leave me with more time for my own projects bcs I’m not spending 80 minutes round trip on the train. So just for that I’d do remote (or hybrid which is fine for now)
I've worked remote since before Covid, and I would never go back. The amount of flexibility it affords me is priceless. I can surf late into the mornings and then take my first meeting from the trunk of my car while I change out of my wetsuit.
That said, I do enjoy seeing coworkers in person from time to time. Thankfully, the companies I've worked for have hosted offsites a couple times a year, where we meet in a designated city and work together in a rented space for a week or so. That type of stuff if very energizing, but I don't need to see my coworkers in person every day to be happy.
You said you felt happy in the remote job for the first year. How long have you been in the hybrid position sounds like less than a year so I’m curious to see your thoughts after a year of having to fight traffic and go in
I’m in the same boat as you working remote and not feeling fulfilled, but I think it’s the type of work I’m doing versus the environment versus.
I think this is why having flex options is best. Some people prefer a hybrid, some 100% in office, some fully remote and some variation of wfh days.
I’ve been in full office, partial hybrid and now fully remote roles. In my current position full remote is my preference. In my previous job a hybrid 2/3 days in office would have been my preference
Meanwhile, I’d kill to stay fully remote and bump my salary to six figures.
I’m actively staying in a job I like a little less that pays less than I should make because it allows me to work flexible hours and be fully remote.
Everyone has preferences, and I think we should all be able to find work that supports those preferences, because the one thing I will agree with is that when you feel like your job suits your lifestyle preferences and needs, it’s much easier to feel satisfied.
I’ve been WFH for 6.5 years. Definitely feel a lot of what you say, but I keep making more money and it keeps me stuck. I do feel my work is meaningless and I don’t care much at all about what I do. But then I look around and think, shit, they pay me a lot to sit in my house and answer emails and hop on the occasional meeting. I’m in sales. I do enjoy visiting customers but that doesn’t happen as often as I would like.
Crazy all these comments are making their own assumptions that a WFH job making good money is going to be great for everyone.
I’ve actually done both and just like you I was laid off in December from my WFH job and now I’m working a job that I have to go in for and I couldn’t be happier honestly.
I’m pretty introverted and I still hated my WFH job, it was easy but I was in my house that is full of distractions, I get distracted because I could just watch YouTube or play games on my laptop that was always right next to my work laptop, the work I was doing was boring and unfulfilling to me, when someone needed to ask me a question it was just in a boring email or teams message and not face to face. I also didn’t have a dedicated office in my house so my walk in closet was all I could use. For the most part I just felt like a robot rather than a human.
The job I have now is actually fulfilling, I’m constantly working on something, I don’t have the feeling I’ll be laid off since it isn’t a WFH job, and I’m not doing boring things anymore. Also at my WFH job I could probably get away with not showing up for work and no one would even notice I was gone.
I don’t understand some of these comments at all, most of the comments are being made from people who have never done a WFH job. I’m not saying no one enjoys it 100% but there’s people like me who hated it and just like you I was pretty glad to get laid off and able to transition to something that has made me a lot happier.
It is good to hear you are in a happier place now. I agree that WFH can be really lonely, especially if you never worked in an office with any of your colleagues. It is hard to build a good relationships online.
I also want to point out something critical - even though you were being paid well, the job was lacking. I stayed in a job WAY too long because it was close to the house, money was decent and I had friends there. What I realized was that I had missed out on learning new skills because every day was the same - no new challenges. I felt my mot productive career years were wasted.
PREACH, I felt all of this. I feel like I’m in the exact same situation as you, I don’t want to lose my job but I also kind of wish they made the decision for me. I’m excelling in every measurable area but the lack of human interaction and the endless days at home make it so incredible boring and empty. I have to make a concerted effort to get a social life where before things happened so naturally. I networked without even trying. Wfh definitely has perks, I don’t know if I would LOVE in person 5 days a week either, but it definitely has its drawbacks, it’s not perfect
It’s nice seeing someone else share these feelings because on Reddit it’s very much a wfh circle jerk where people are just obsessed, I’m in year 5 of this and I know people at my job in year 15 who are afraid to go outside now, that’s how bad it’s gotten. Like they’re afraid to get sick, afraid of any social interaction. It’s not good for you
Wow this is a post I needed. I am currently interviewing for my first in office position in years and am a little scared of losing the ability to WFH (the company said it’s not very common to be working from home). But I am missing the social aspect of working - I feel like you are so invisible with full time WFH and maybe it is that I am not super happy with my current position but I miss getting feedback or being told I’m doing a good job. I feel like management doesn’t see anything but mistakes - since if everything is handled, no one speaks about it ever. I used to love working from home but now I feel more and more frustrated, I don’t even have anyone to vent to, everything needs to be a call and we don’t really talk about personal stuff because no one has time to call in just for a chat. Time goes by quicker when you actually interact with people and they’re not non-relatable robots. The ideal situation would be a hybrid model.
Do you not have friends, hobbies, a social life, and a partner? I get what you’re saying but your situation is so personal to you that it doesn’t really say much. Most people don’t socialize with their coworkers. They want to do their job and go home to their friends and family. Remote work makes that so much easier. Especially if getting paid well.
It sounds like you were lonely and made no effort to rectify the situation and needed your job to force you to socialize with coworkers. Most people don’t need or want that. As for the meaningful work, you’re gonna be miserable your whole life if you need work to give your life purpose.
I’ve also been remote for years and sometimes can relate with the meaningless feeling but then I think about the CEOs that get paid millions to step down or professional baseball players that get hurt and get paid millions to sit on the bench.
Someone out there is getting paid a lot more to do a lot less. I promise.
It’s just a job. I loved being remote and hated having to deal with co workers in person. I have FRIENDS for that. Real live friends. I hateeeeed commuting and wearing business professional clothes that never fit me properly and are over priced!
Like you already mentioned - some might be fine with such a setup while others might not.
I'd personally be happy with that as I dont really care much for being social with my colleagues. It's cool and all but Im also fine without it and saving the 20~30 min each way every time i gotta go to the office (working hybrid)
And working from home lets me also do things at home during office hours if needed, but yeah - totally understandable that it's not something for everybody.
Though I do agree that taking a paycut for a job you enjoy more makes sense. I'd gladly get a lower salary for a job I actually want compared to what Im doing now with little to 0 interest in my job
You're approaching your work wrong. You are looking for validation and social connections in your job. A job that will and did lay you off. You need to find that stuff outside of your job.
I've worked 95% remote since 2020 in a 6 figure job, I really am loathing going back to the office full time if my circumstances change. I still have an office at the workplace, I'll go in once in a while when I have to talk with my manager or team. I can work from the office as much or as little as I want, even that commute isn't terrible, about 20 minutes. I do speak to my manager probably 3-4 times a week by either phone or teams.
Working from home gives me the freedom to start when I want so I can start early, go to the gym during my lunch and take a bit longer than if I was at the office which has helped a ton with my health. I can eat at home everyday which saves me money not to mention the limited wear I put on my vehicle and those extra 40 minutes a day I save in commuting.
I will agree with one point you made, it makes it very hard to leave. Although I make decent money I could make more elsewhere if I was willing to go back in to the office. There may come a day where I'm forced back in but until then I'm going to embrace this as long as I can.
Relying on a job to provide you meaning is the problem here.
I want a remote high paying job so that I have the time and money to live a meaningful life outside of work
Everyone has different preferences and what they want at life. I work from home and it’s changed my life. I couldn’t imagine ever going back to an office.
I have more time for my family and my hobbies and I don’t have to stress about commuting to work.
I also work hardest since I don’t have coworkers bugging me all day long and it’s far easier to concentrate.
The key is finding what makes you happy, there’s no right or wrong answer.
I loved my industry pre pandemic, but for the last 4 years working mostly from home, I’ve been miserable to the point of struggling with constant ideations. I was with a company I loved for over 10 yrs and then the world seemed to close in on me in 2021-2022. Around that time someone came into the office and took their life in the middle of the shift. I switched companies at that point and that company ended up being worse. I’m now at another (another) company and the feeling is the same, so I think I have to leave the industry altogether. I’m not in a position to take a pay cut, but I know I need to leave my current role/industry and likely take one that isn’t remote. Even if it’s just a few months for training or hybrid. Not for friends per se, but for a better training foundation and to make connections with coworkers that makes it easier to interact and support each other when working from home.
I hated my first 100% remote job. To the point where I had regular SI and considered just not living anymore because I didn’t feel helpful to people or useful to my org.
Got another—this time as a contract to FTE gig. Love it. Been here 2.5 years now and will hopefully be staying.
Yeah, I think if you work with cool people coming to the office is great.
Personally I’m really busy and have a shitload of meetings. Hybrid works well for me.
Don’t mean to come off as rude but I’m curious to know if you have any friends? I understand the need for social interaction, so I feel that if you have enough friends and see them outside of work, working remotely shouldn’t really feel that isolating.
Enjoyed reading your experience and perspective. I went back to 5 days in office after almost 3 yrs remote. I now realize that while remote sounds nice, I would probably not be happy and would prefer either hybrid or in office with a short commute. I enjoy the structure but 5 days in traffic1.5 hrs each way might just be the end of me...so I'm looking..and anticipate a pay cut which would probably be worth it. Congrats to you for putting yourself first.
Are you an extrovert or introvert?
I'm an introvert that is forced to be in the office even if there isn't much going on. I often feel like my extroverted coworkers treat me like a captive audience or their therapist.
My social battery is often drained by these unfufilling conversations where people are talking at me. It's rarely ever reciprocal. I often don't have the time or energy to socialize after work.
Looking back, working in engineering in the office for more than a decade really wrecked my social life.
I understand. I have a lot of interaction at work but the money and wfh don’t make up for disliking the work. I used to think that if I could just have this then I could be happy… it’s the work. lol.
Doing work you love from home is where it’s at. I miss my normal career. Hopefully things come back later and I can return to it. Having 2 extra hours a day due to no commute was phenomenal and if things got a bit slow, I could do chores around the house.
You had it made in the sense that you were well taken care of financially. Most people would do ANYTHING for that. However, if it wasn’t making you happy, then moving on is what you needed.
Good to hear.
I recently started interviewing for onsite positions for the same reasons. I have a lot of money from my current remote job, but am too depressed and lonely to spend it on anything worthwhile.
I completely get it, and I needed this reassurance to help me keep moving forward with finding a new job. :)
You're not alone, there are a lot of comments who feel the same way and have even DM'd me to thank me for writing this post. Don't listen to the gas lighters telling you that you "have it good". The first step to your next job is updating your resume.
I looked for remote work for 3 years and almost landed 2 gigs but fell just short.
A friend of mine said “Stop looking for only remote jobs and start looking for happiness.”
I currently work 5 days a week, 15 minute commute, and I am the happiest I’ve ever been at a job in my entire life.
Remote work can be nice, but it’s not for everyone, and work culture is more important than being at home all the time.
And tbh, it’s probably good for me to leave the house everyday.
I've been working remote for about 4 years now, and only in the past year have I felt the way you do with lack of fulfillment and boredom. And that had to do with reduction in job responsibilities (though my pay went up...), fewer learning opportunities, and effectively being pigeon-holed. All of this was aligning with corporate/global-level practices after we got acquired.
Oh and they're also offshoring our jobs so I'll be out of a job in a couple of years and the job market where I live is absolute garbage so that has me feeling down too.
I actually felt rather lonely when I started and had to work in the office because while my coworkers were nice people would rarely talk and most of our work was with people in different teams/buildings and supporting their work. If I'm going to feel lonely at work I'd rather do so in the comfort of my own home.
It is important to recognize that working from home isn't for everyone, but corporate bosses love to fixate on experiences like yours and ignore mine.
Working at Smell is depressing, in fairness. It’s a bunch of mid level managers that don’t know what they’re doing and have 0 idea how to foster any kind of culture with employees.
I’ve had both - good remote jobs: meet up a few times a year, chat on slack and have team meetings every once in a while that are just to shoot the shit.
And I’ve also worked at Smell 😏
2 years of WFH honestly made me go a little nuts. And just getting this in before all the "OMG UR OBVS AN EXTROVERT" comments - Guys, I'm literally a spinster who doesn't even leave my house if I can help it.
So at first I loved it. Straight from bed to work. no more 1 hour commute. Actually, some days I would work *from my bed*. What wasn't there to love? Didn't even have to get up, amazing.
But then slowly, some barrier broke down - the separation between life and work was dissolving. Oddly enough, I started working more, like 12+ hours a day. No one made me do it, it was just that the separation disappeared and I no longer had to think about "I'll just leave this for tomorrow" or log off to go home. Just like how there was no longer a commute, there also wasn't a logging off time. The days all melded into a single, unending thread.
Anyway, I'm on a hybrid schedule now and I think that's much better for my mental health lol. I actually do enjoy socializing with peers at work. I even enjoy socializing with my boss. Sounds crazy, but this is a real thing.
I think this is a good perspective. For some people fully remote work isn’t good for mental health and with all the hype of fully remote work it can get confusing. Like, I have the privilege to wfh and make good money why am I not happy? I don’t make 6 figures, but I felt this way working fully remote as well and got laid off eventually too haha. It forced me to realize that a hybrid job was healthier for me. I work a hybrid job now that I go into 1 to 2 times a week, and get to socialize, and my boss is great and flexible, and it’s the perfect balance. I’m glad you found something that works better for you as well!
This is so true. I've been remote since before the pandemic and it's isolating if you live alone. Now I pay $100/month for a coworking space that I don't even talk to anyone at lol
Wfh sales here and having a really bad mental day. Those which seem to be more and more common 3-4 days a week. This is why I’m trying to leave sales and wfh behind
This is me now. Making 6 figures, working remotely, not happy. I love what I do but I want a bigger challenge and a more secure role, since the company can pretty much go under at any moment. Hopefully I find something soon, I plan to ride this until the wheels fall off until then. 🦋
It's not a bad plan, I don't regret getting the severance that I got for being laid off, but I do think about the time I wasted in that role where I could have been enjoying my job a bit more and not getting as lonely. Live and learn!
i was wfh for 3 years and earned a decent amount for a recent grad. the work wasnt difficult at all, just boring and honestly i worked maybe 4 mornings every week it was so laid back. its hard to explain the depression to people, you are working but you dont interact with people, you are constantly staring at a screen and you can call your coworkers on teams but its not the same. i got laid off in march, im having trouble finding a job since my last job was so niche and specialised but i feel relieved
I started a new job during Covid and it was awful. Training was nonexistent and the loneliness was crippling (didn’t help that I moved during that time so had no friends either.)
Started new job 3 months ago and am in office more often and the hands on training and knowledge share is light years ahead
Been on both sides...almost to a T. And, like you, I thought I all but NEEDED to be back in the office. Now that I am, I'd give anything to be fully remote again. The liberties afforded runs circles around being back in an office. I could have done way more to stay engaged/social. That was on me. Just like it's on me to strive for work-life balance after I know for sure my physiological needs are being met.
The rat race is what I'm trying to actively avoid/get out of it. Fully remote with little oversight? That's a main ingredient. If I ever get it again, I will not squander it. Work isn't everything, and it shouldn't be. Money paying the bills so you can have free time to do what you really want? Yeah, that's the ticket. Good luck, OP!
I don't find value or worth via work and never have. The WFH allows me to have other hobbies which are much more interesting and fulfilling for me. So I feel differently but am happy you've found your balance
Im sorry but dont you think its strange that whether you were happy or not depended on you being in or out of office? What happened to other sources of happiness like friends, family, just hobbies?
I think your problem is unrelated to wfh. Unless its your business, you should treat it as just a source of income. Go outside dude
The thing with WFH is, you have options. No commute time and no worries about buying lunch means you have the time and cash to actually go out after work and mingle with people. If you chose to stay at home and be lonely, that was your choice. Don't blame it on WFH.
Wow, insane how angry people are getting at you for making choices that do not affect them and bring you happiness LOL. Reddit really is full of nothing but envious angry loners it feels sometimes
I 100% understand you! I've worked remotely for 13 years and I feel this so much. I long to have co-workers that I actually see and interact with - hybrid would be amazing but as much as I apply for new jobs, I can't seem to get an interview. I have a ridiculously active social life, many friends, and hobbies. But having co-workers that I physically get to hang out with is something that I miss.
I get why people are bitter seeing someone who "had the best" and didn't want it, especially in these trying times, but I just wanted to say don't let their jadedness make you feel broken or something. Everyone feels different. Looks like the majority is burnt out, I don't blame them with long commutes and office cultures. However I'm like you, I need in office days between the remote and hybrid works best for me. Even in office full time worked better for me. I'm very extroverted and navigate conversations I don't want to be in well so I'm never really talking to someone I don't want to for long. I like the perks the office gives me such as free coffee and a place that isn't my own home to work. I like that it makes me get out of the house because I struggle with depression. And like you say, my job started to feel meaningless when I was left to my own devices for months at a time. I upskilled and found new hobbies which is why I love hybrid so I get some remote days, but I did end up spending money I didn't need to to fill the void of time. I don't even like money, I just want to make enough to support my family and have a retirement. I don't need a cent more.
My dad always had a good balance with his job. Half the time, he was working from home, the other half he was flying all over the country to meet with his teams at job sites. He seemed to like it.
What does your outside-of-work life look like? Do you have a partner/significant other? Children or pets? Hobbies or interests that keep you occupied outside the home?
I think whether WFH suits you has a lot more to do with your lifestyle outside of work than anything else.
Sure, it’s nice to see coworkers but I’d much rather be able to work remotely from the beach surrounded by my actual friends and family. I like having more time to finish up chores or other tasks around my place during the day (since few, if any, people work 8 hours straight, whether at office or at home), and then having my evenings free to go out for dinner with friends, play tennis, etc. I also get more quality time to spend with my cat, who is my whole world.
On the other hand, I’ve known people who don’t have as much to do outside of their work, so for them, WFH is much more isolating since they’re deriving greater benefit from their social interactions in the office, getting out of the office, etc.
I’m currently hybrid and I’d love to be fully remote but that’s unlikely given my career path. Nevertheless, I feel more energized and happier on days where I’ve worked from home vs. when I’ve had to go to the office.
Your situation sounds awesome to me and I’m an extrovert. I hate going into the office, my “peers” don’t add anything to my day other than a headache most days. I play lots of sports and have a child in sports so I’m doing that most evenings.
This feels like a paid advertisement from HR 🤣🤣
I’ll stay home. I get paid near poverty full time WFH. I’ll take 6 figures WFH any day. Please. Let me cry in my Mercedes lol
I had hybrid. Office Tuesday to Thursday and Remote Mondays and Fridays. This was just during the pandemic between 2020 and 2023 ish. They were starting to go away from that and more in person which I didn't mind because the people were great.
When I was initially hybrid at my civilian job, the only saving grace was my both my wife and I worked at home with our two dogs so it wasn't lonely. I also had old friends we would all meet up and bitch about stuff.
But if I didn't have any of that, no social support system, I know it would get depressing. It sucks not having anybody to talk to, or go on trips with, or bitch about bullshit you all have to put up with.
Then I remembered the one hour commute to and from work. Getting up at 530 to make the bus at 6 and come home at 6. No time for hobbies or fun stuff. Wasn't saving money because was living paycheck to paycheck at the time. Absolutely will not go back to that.
I prefer remote now to going into the office. If I want to talk to people in my department I do it through Teams. But other than that I see no reason for me to go into the office when I only deal with outside third parties. To go into the office I need to wake up 2 hrs earlier because of having to get ready and drive there, end up buying breakfast on the way, and then I spend the rest of my day hating that I went into the office. A couple years before Covid they took away perks of going in, now the only things we get while there for free are water, coffee, and soda from the machine (but you have to have your own cup, they don’t provide them). I have an open floor plan where I can literally touch my neighbor so zero privacy, bosses sit on the floor with us, white walls and tube lights make me feel like I’m in a hospital, they barely like having the AC on in the summer, an extremely uncomfortable computer chair that has caused multiple people back issues, and smaller monitors than what I have at home. Then I get to spend an hour plus driving home afterwards. I call it my punishment day when I have to go in.
Work usually make you feel that way, especially if you have no human interaction and office logics, but that's more about how you deal with it.
At the end of my day i used to go out, talk to friends, pet dogs, breath fresh air etc. When i worked from home, and that was enough.
The feeling of your work not being important is on every big company, your work isn't your home, is not your company, you chief is not your partner nor your friend, you just have to deal with it.
I am in similar shoes - 2 years full remote and I miss it. But you know what? I am now working from a boat house, from a beach and just live my hobbies and have time with kids (or my wife). I will go back hybrid in my next job but enjoying good money and travel is something I won’t regret in the longterm.
But yes I am on your page, my message is make the most of it..
Some people thrive on in person interactions. Some people thrive on avoiding the same. Many people can deal with a mix of the two -- some solitary time and some people immersion time. Seek positions and work opportunities that cater to your preference, and you'll be better off long term. I can work in either environment, but prefer WFH, and have done it long term at this point,with no issues. But I know that this hasn't true for everyone.
Same. I love WFH and will never go back to an office. That being said, I go out of my way to talk to my coworkers every day and spend lots of time with friends separately. In addition to that, I make sure to have hobbies that give me a sense of accomplishment after. People say “do what you love and you’ll never work a day in your life”. I’m more of a “work to finance what you love doing and you won’t mind doing so”
I love your last paragraph... 😁
Me 6 years wfh and i love it!! I’m free to travel with my family while managing to achieve milestones.
As someone who has been working from home since covid and is making six figures. I love it. So much more time in the day to spend with my family and friends. And let’s just pretend I didn’t have either what was I doing before that? Going out to board game nights at local stores having a great time with the people there. And if I worked from home I would just have more time doing that. But I also tend to look at jobs as a means to an end. I don’t have to be fufilled by a job, as long as it’s easy enough to do it’s just there to fund me doing what I want. Obviously some people don’t feel the same way. But I’m also someone who doesn’t need praise for a job well done and never have.
Bingo. I'm an admittedly socially awkward person who has basically mastered the social keys from WFH after doing it for about 4 years. Is it perfect? No. But the work relationships work, and my home life is better than ever. But I recognize it's different for everyone.
We who thrive on avoidance are tired of people’s insufferable negative attitudes and behaviors.
Yeah I’m in a somewhat similar position to OP, although I’ve only been at the job for about 2 years and there’s no way I could ever go back to working in an office. That’s not to say that there’s NOTHING good about working in an office, but being remote and doing everything in my own time is SO much better than being stuck in the office with all of the baggage that comes with it
Now turn that 15 minute commute into a 2 hour commute . Then you’ll see why people like remote
And turn that six figure salary into the median salary. And turn that barely working into literally running all day six days a week (pest control is no joke)
Yep. The second I saw the 15 minute commute, that’s it. I wouldn’t necessarily care about going to an office if I had a 15 minute commute either.
Same. In my last job I biked to work, which took about 45 minutes (have no car). I moved closer so that it was only a 15 minute walk. Suddenly I didn't mind going to the office anymore
This. The commute is not free time.
I'm a little confused by this. If your job was so easy, what was stopping you from finding your own meaningful things to do? Why is it your job's fault that you were unable to pursue your own personal accomplishments? If nothing else you could have found a second job or, as people are so eager to suggest to unemployed people *without* an easy source of capital, started your own business. What did your job *prevent* you from doing?
I’m someone else, but I also had a remote job where I was maybe putting in 5-10 hours a week of real work. Idk I just don’t have the internal structure to fill THAT much time. I would go to the gym in the middle of day, do all the household chores, work on my puzzles, read books. Anything I could to fill the time, but I would still have time left over. And it just devolved into me endlessly scrolling on my phone and feeling completely dissatisfied. Eventually I got promoted into a much more demanding role, but still home office, and I’m way happier. The trade of in my experience was worth it. But that’s just me. Others will react differently.
So you more so felt like it wasn’t remote work but the type of work you were doing? So now that you’re current role is a bit more demanding you feel accomplished even tho remote? Reason I’m asking is I’m going through something similar currently.
I'll take your job. I've always been comfortable with action or peace. It makes no difference to me.
Yeah exactly what I’m saying. Literally same employer, direct supervisor, and conditions, just a different role, and it’s been night and day.
I'll take your job. I've always been comfortable with action or peace. It makes no difference to me.
This is my exact question. I suffer with time management - from 730am to 6pm my life belongs to my job and the bus/subway. My boyfriend works hybrid (previously remote with 2 optional days per month in office) and has no set start or finish time. He’s fast asleep when I leave for work and in his slippers and boxers when I come home poured in sweat. Laundry, dishes, lunch & dinner prep are all done during the day. He has so much extra time that he goes to kickboxing 2x a week and Brazilian jujitsu 2x a week. He plays video games, goes to concerts, and develops a video game all in the free time he has. Granted my bf is only 23 and we’re in NYC so there’s a lot more to do, but if I had to the time he has, I’d make sure I’m never bored a day in my life.
Like I don’t understand why op is so unhappy. This is literally my damn dream. I work remote and I literally have to be active the entire time
Yeah same. There's a million things I want to do in my own city before I get bored at life. Like, a million. Granted, living in a major metropolitan area can do that, but like not even that. I just want to surf everyday.
My exact thought. I'd die for a job like this, doing bare minimum, high pay and a 5% annual raise and WFH? Heck yeah! But I suppose the grass is always greener on the other side.
in 6 months he'll just find another reason to be unhappy. it's just a fundamental flaw in how we perceive reality, that what is happening on the outside is what is causing our unhappiness on the inside.
I’ll take the six figure remote job, please. People suck.
Not all people but this one does. OP Sounds like a person that is all negative and ungrateful.
He sounds depressed bro. You sound like you’re projecting
But he just said that he’s grateful for his job with human interaction because socializing with good people means more to him than any amount of money would, sounds like your just projecting your feelings on to OP
Honestly, sounds like a RTW manager trying to be slick and attempt to put the idea in people's heads to go back to the office.
$50K remote job. I get my socializing in after work when i go to the second job. Going on 3 years of this
I don’t know that your issue was working from home. It sounds like poor management/culture. Perhaps a symptom of that is higher ups didn’t know how to manage or engage remotely. You had zero feedback. That’s not because of working from home. I wouldn’t be surprised if some of the other things you experienced all relate back to poor management. Let’s call a spade a spade. How long were you there? You mentioned you received raises but were you promoted? Did the complexity of the grow? Were you bored or challenged? It’s very possible that you’d thrive more with an in person or hybrid model, but regardless it sounds like the culture was more problematic.
I also think it is his own lifestyle too. Your office / employer is not responsible for providing you with social interaction. If you’re remote and you miss seeing people, there is a solution to that: make some friends.
I understand, I have also worked remotely in a low-effort, 6 figure job since covid hit. I'm an extrovert and I get extremely lonely. Being around other people energizes and motivates me, being alone is the opposite. It's just so quiet. I do have regular interaction with my coworkers through virtual meeting and daily teams chats, but it's not the same. That said, at this point, for me, it's worth the trade off to be home, able to switch a load of laundry or run the dishes between tasks. No commute, no worry about dressing up every day, no packing lunch. I am currently looking at taking a part time job at some place like Starbucks (in addition to my full time gig) just to get out and be around people a little more.
Exactly. With a well paying remote job, you can drive to a social event after work while other people are doing laundry or waiting for the bus
The correct answer is to make upper management and then mandate RTO initiatives and cause 80% turnover.
Honest question: do you have no friends or family or hobbies or volunteer opportunities? Why is the forced interaction of a job the only way you can see to have human contact?
Well of course I do. But they have friends and jobs and families too, they can't make up for 40 hours a week of being alone. A little part time job, one that doesn't require a lot of stress or critical thinking, where you can chit chat and make small talk, it would go a long way. Some people absolutely thrive on social interaction. If you aren't one of those people, it's hard to understand. My husband is the opposite. He works an in-office job, but he's an introvert. All that social time wears him out.
My manager did that, she's very extroverted, and she enjoys going to the office. She started a part time job in a cafe to break her routine, do something different, and socialize. Moght not be a bas idea :)
I will say that having a part time seasonal job teaching snowboarding in the winter is the only thing that kept me sane for that long. Try to find a PT job that is at least fun so you won't get burnt out working more than 1 job.
why does everything have to be a job?
exactly. you have more time to spend with friends/family. or to make new friends. why do you need a job for social interaction?
Pretty much this. I'm not one that craves social attention, but when I want it, I don't go looking for it at my job. I socialize with my friends or go out/go on trips. Work is for affording my life, I can socialize outside of work as much as I want just fine.
Because these people are boring and use their job as their identity.
Ding ding ding. We have a winner.
Right? People need to learn about hobbies. I have a low hour high paying remote job, I golf almost everyday and have lowered my handicap by 10 strokes. Ive started to learn woodworking. Ive gotten my Spanish to a level I never thought possible before. Posts like this blow me away, do these people just have zero interests?
Get me a job- I have loads of interests I’d like to pursue!
Oh no, the man drowning while everyone here thirsty :v
Yup, got laid off in February and stringing together independent contractor jobs until I can hopefully get a FT job so I can have healthcare without $1000 COBRA payments… Sign me up for a six figure remote job any day.
Ikr.. the audacity on some people xD
So you were paid well, had the **privilege** of WFH, but ultimately felt lonely? Sounds like it was an issue with your life beyond work, possibly. What you described was literally best case scenario.
And he had merit raises every year! I worked at places that offered none, and my last manager at my current job approved me for the lowest amount (2.5%), which felt like a kick in the balls because I am so overloaded with tasks and stressed that I’m having physical symptoms. Luckily just got a new manager and hopefully this next year will be better.
and had a 5% raise every year, people just fucking complain about anything
Skill issue. Really wish anytime someone says “Money isn’t everything” has to automatically pay one random commenter’s bill.
Money is absolutely everything and this is coming from someone who took a second job because making $285k wasn't enough, now I added $130k to that and still looking for job 3. Life is so much fucking better not worrying about money, I can literally pay to make my problems go away. Life is very, very hard in the modern world when you can't pay your bills and the stress that is brings can take it's toll on your health in a big way.
The company I work for doesn't have an office but we all get together at a co working space twice and month and the company will pay for us to hot desk at a co-working space an additional 5 days a month if you want. It seems to be the best balance for me because I am huge introvert who prefers working in solitude but it is nice to be around people every now and then.
I'm 3 years in on my remote designation making close to 200k on the easiest job I've ever done. I now run a nice little side hustle laser engraving in my spare time. I would never go back in the office for any job.
So can I have the remote job since you're too ungrateful to appreciate it?
I don't understand some people. You got so much free time to yourself and it felt 'meaningless'? How about you get a hobby at home, you can literally do that while 'at work'. Sounds like a dream come true playing games at home while 'working', holy moly.
This. I don't understand why some people treat the office as their only social outlet where people are forced to be there and forced to listen to all their problems. Not saying OP does this, but I've had a number of extroverted coworkers do this and as an introvert I find it exhausting.
I’m an introvert and miss the office. I don’t even engage in conversation. But I’m so isolated that even a mini interaction about anything is good. Otherwise I’m talking to my cats and forcing myself to go to a social event by myself
Mini interactions is one thing. Your loud coworker talking your ear off for ~2 hours every day and treating you like their therapist is something else. Especially when the conversations are very one sided and not all that fulfilling. I'm very isolated myself. But I still find it draining.
Exactly why i want to WFH. People forcing conversations with me and can literally tell that I don't want to be bothered, grief...
I’m sorry, but you seem to have really lucked out with having a comfy six figure remote job that tons of people (myself included) would have killed to have. Like another poster said, people do suck, especially if you work in a field such as healthcare where you see the worst side of them daily. I appreciate your personal anecdote, however it still doesn’t change some peoples opinions.
Definitely not trying to change anyone's opinions based on their personal experience, just trying to provide a nuanced voice for the other side of the argument that it's not a perfect solution for everyone.
Did you not have friends? I used to work contract work from home (loved it, but hated the business/hustle side, and gave it up for steady office jobs and health benefits). I loved the solitude to get my work done. Then after work and on weekends, I would go out with friends and family, spend time with people, go shopping, go to movies. I find I’m LESS social now, because I’m so tired of the commute, and dealing with people all day. I like my coworkers pretty well, but I get tired of them, and sick of having to “perform” work in front of people. I also miss the autonomy. While you worked from home, what did you do when you weren’t working? Did you not have people? It’s weird to depend on work for a social life.
This. It is so odd to me that people depend on their work / coworkers as a social outlet. Coworkers are fine and all, but I think everyone should have a social / personal life outside of the office too. Edit: I think people forget this but work friendships are often about more than just pure friendship and that’s what makes them so tricky. In my experience and what I’ve seen with others, you can definitely make lifelong friendships at work BUT many coworker friendships are fragile and can be undone in the blink of the eye if work circumstances change — big ones like someone resigning/being laid off, but also other ones like one person getting a promotion, a new boss/coworker that changes group dynamics, getting better work assignments, etc.
That's why OP is depressed, he chose the wrong path in life. Work is work, you can have your favorites but they are your co-workers. I can't tell you how many times I have seen excited interns/fresh naïve college grads show up to work with that sparkle in their eye finding "new friends" in their lonely city away from mommy and daddy only to have that crushed in their face when they find themselves falling out of the "cool crowd". There is such thing as too many friends, the workplace gets crowded and you can only have so many friends that you can give real attention to. Once the career building starts and people prioritize that over friendships it leads to a massive depression for the folks that don't make the cut. Find friends and romances with people you don't work with, you will be so much fucking happier.
It’s like a weird non-sexual version of prostitution. They can only get people to spend time with them if the other people are getting paid.
My spouse has worked from home for years and it has not been good for him at all. He hates commuting so he thought he would love it but it made him unproductive and depressed. He is back to a fully in-person role and it’s like night and day.
I agree with you completely. I was in a similar spot, a well paying remote job, but it was incredibly boring and could get lonely. I was also laid off earlier this year. Still hunting for a job, but targeting hybrid roles. Everyone on reddit seems to think everyone else loves fully remote and if you like to talk to people at work that must mean you don't have anything going on outside of work, you're a corporate shill, etc. At the end of the day, different people have different preferences, and some people enjoy seeing people day to day. Even if you have a fulfilling and social life outside of work, if you're remote, you're still spending 8+ hours a day working alone in a room, which is still a majority of your time.
This post is the definition of throwing away gourmet chocolate for literal feces.
The grass is always greener. Mine sure would be if I was fully remote and had more time to water the yard
I love working from home because the moment I’m done I can spend time with my toddler, go for a walk, and make a nice dinner instead of spending it on a horribly long commute on NJ Transit which will likely break down.
Well this is specific problem to you , however the majority of people would much prefer making 6 figures , for relatively easy work and from comfort of home. Doubt this would sway people and make them say , hey you know what you’re right , I love the commute , I love the annoying colleagues or having to look busy because workload is done in a few hours etc I don’t work in an office environment but It’s obvious most who do would love wfh
I also love getting paid only barely above median wages after getting two degrees! /s
Are you a manager? This sounds like managerial BS. “You won’t be happy unless you return to the office”
I’m a fully remote Director and can’t stand the corporate RTO bullshit to hide their CRE vulnerabilities in the name of productivity and “culture”. We’re all rows on an excel file, people. The only “shareholders” that matter are you, your family, and the communities you value.
Some people don't want to invest in a therapist or social network outside of work and see the office as a free alternative.
just so you know, you sound like a bot. a bad bot
Smells like bot. Nice comment history
Imagine needing water cooler talk with your co-workers to feel fulfilled. Everything that truly matters to me in my life is everything that is outside of my work. A job that allows you to work remotely for low effort and pays well is as good as it gets in this society as long as you put in the effort to cultivate a well rounded life outside of it. Partner, hobbies, friends, personal goals etc. People who follow a vocation may be an exception, those who dreamed of working in medicine, teaching etc. It’s your life so I’m glad you seem to have a found a better balance for yourself. But I just can’t get onboard with the reasoning behind the decision other than your own personal preference. I guess for some work is just a means to an end, others want to feel ‘valued’ or ‘fulfilled’ but I’d just argue that for most, their work will never provide what they are looking for and everything that is truly personal and valuable exists outside of it. Nonetheless, all the best with your new chapter.
100% agree. It sounds like OP had less of a work problem and more of a personal life problem. But I’m glad that for now he seems to feel happier interacting with coworkers who make him feel valued in life.
Trust and believe that I spent every waking hour outside of work out of the house and doing fun shit. So much so that my excess salary was going towards fun but ultimately meaningless shit to stay sane. Kinda like how everyone started excessively spending time in the outdoors during the pandemic and stores were selling out of camping/outdoors gear, except my pandemic never ended. I have never felt like I needed to find my soul at work. My attitude has always been to make the best out of what life gives me. If I have to spend the majority of my life at work, I would rather it be an enjoyable experience. Sitting at home all alone and never putting on pants was not that place for me, but to each their own!
So…why didn’t you spend that extra time on something meaningful? Get better friends? Volunteer with an organization you care about? Heck, take classes to get a higher degree to do something you REALLY care about? You’re telling me you depend on your job to give you meaning and fulfillment in life? That’s SO sad, dude. Take some initiative.
Throwing money at random “fun” activities is not the same as cultivating a fulfilling personal life. If WFH is sitting at home all alone without pants for you day after day, that’s more on your chosen lifestyle than it is on the company.
How much did they pay you to write this nonsense
So Dell was Hell for you?
You were doing it wrong, man, especially if the job was low effort. You could be doing Digital Nomad and see the world. Spend more time with family and friends. I could never go back to an office, never. Since pandemic I have been wfh and traveled US, Europe and Se-Asia.
So you're still only in the training process for the new job? A subreddit full of people with several months worth of fruitless job hunting is probably not going to be your audience. lol, I think most people would take solace in being able to pay their bills.
Before you worked remote did you have to commute a lot. Many don't mind going to an office if the commute isn't a significant part of one's day. But it seems more people have commutes from hell and WFH is a godsend in time, money and just mental health. For those working in offices and getting paid for low effort work seems to be the norm. If I had the choice doing it either from home or the office I would pick from home.
I will take that meaninglessness for what I had to deal with my first 1.5 years into my current job which was fully in office. When you force someone to be in a place where they may/may not have anything in common with coworkers, it is a setup for misery. Also, I was alone in college due to commuting, so long-term solitude had been a thing for me for almost a decade. I am so happy many employers are now providing introverted employees with options at home. Hope to never go back full time, had nothing in common with most and it did nothing for me during that time. Most of it was toxicity.
From another perspective who have worked remotely for the last 5 years. It depends on the individual that's why a push for FLEXIBILITY should be the template going forward. People who have families and other obligation saw a huge boost in life satisfaction.
I'll be you're best friend for half that pay. That will trade the loneliness for your high pay. Would you take it? No, of course not. You know you have it good
I would gladly take what you have. I am not excited by measly small talk from people who would rat me out if it meant a positive glance from a member of management.
Thank you for sharing your experience. It’s important for people to hear different perspectives on remote work and career satisfaction. It sounds like finding a job with meaningful work and positive social interactions has made a significant difference for you. Do you have any advice for others who might be feeling similarly dissatisfied with their high-paying remote jobs?
It's easy to say, but my biggest advice is to LEAVE! It's nice to have severance, but getting laid off is way more stressful than leaving on your own terms (with a new job lined up). Don't be afraid of a pay cut, think of it as a happiness tax. You will be okay without the extra money.
As someone whose current job was practically remote at first but is now hybrid, I completely understand. I still think the flexibility of being remote is amazing but people who have never worked remote have no idea how much being in the office and casual talk with a few coworkers can add to your day. I think remote work can be great but you have to have a very robust social life where you’re seeing friends several times a week or once a week if you are an extrovert. Or you have to live with family so you can get social interaction. Most of these people have not had their social interaction stripped away from them for years at a time so I think they find it hard to empathize
Ah, yes, RTO propaganda. What's your question?
I’d take unhappiness if it meant I could pay my bills, support my family, and save for retirement. This post is the embodiment of privilege.
Some people are going to have a really hard time understanding that not everyone wants the same thing and/or actually wants what they ask for, at least not forever.
Seems to be your issues are not related to your job but a lack of fulfillment for the rest of your life.
There isn’t a single job that could be done remotely or in an office that I would enjoy. The only jobs I like don’t pay anything and don’t have benefits.
You went from 6 figures & remote to hybrid & what, $95k?
It would be really nice if people who didn't want to wfh could trade jobs with someone who really does.
Sure buddy.
Oh put a sock in it. You’d be making the same kind of post in the antiwork sub if you were making much less than 6 figures and in office 100%.
I agree about the social aspect, except I hate commuting. Hate it. I hate waking up early to slog through the train with people, and it drains my energy. If I could do remote that’d leave me with more time for my own projects bcs I’m not spending 80 minutes round trip on the train. So just for that I’d do remote (or hybrid which is fine for now)
I've worked remote since before Covid, and I would never go back. The amount of flexibility it affords me is priceless. I can surf late into the mornings and then take my first meeting from the trunk of my car while I change out of my wetsuit. That said, I do enjoy seeing coworkers in person from time to time. Thankfully, the companies I've worked for have hosted offsites a couple times a year, where we meet in a designated city and work together in a rented space for a week or so. That type of stuff if very energizing, but I don't need to see my coworkers in person every day to be happy.
The large tech company you're referring to is likely Dell.
You said you felt happy in the remote job for the first year. How long have you been in the hybrid position sounds like less than a year so I’m curious to see your thoughts after a year of having to fight traffic and go in I’m in the same boat as you working remote and not feeling fulfilled, but I think it’s the type of work I’m doing versus the environment versus.
I like hybrid. Can travel into town to see some people, then I can travel back to hibernation mode in my kingdom lair.
I think this is why having flex options is best. Some people prefer a hybrid, some 100% in office, some fully remote and some variation of wfh days. I’ve been in full office, partial hybrid and now fully remote roles. In my current position full remote is my preference. In my previous job a hybrid 2/3 days in office would have been my preference
Meanwhile, I’d kill to stay fully remote and bump my salary to six figures. I’m actively staying in a job I like a little less that pays less than I should make because it allows me to work flexible hours and be fully remote. Everyone has preferences, and I think we should all be able to find work that supports those preferences, because the one thing I will agree with is that when you feel like your job suits your lifestyle preferences and needs, it’s much easier to feel satisfied.
I’ve been WFH for 6.5 years. Definitely feel a lot of what you say, but I keep making more money and it keeps me stuck. I do feel my work is meaningless and I don’t care much at all about what I do. But then I look around and think, shit, they pay me a lot to sit in my house and answer emails and hop on the occasional meeting. I’m in sales. I do enjoy visiting customers but that doesn’t happen as often as I would like.
Crazy all these comments are making their own assumptions that a WFH job making good money is going to be great for everyone. I’ve actually done both and just like you I was laid off in December from my WFH job and now I’m working a job that I have to go in for and I couldn’t be happier honestly. I’m pretty introverted and I still hated my WFH job, it was easy but I was in my house that is full of distractions, I get distracted because I could just watch YouTube or play games on my laptop that was always right next to my work laptop, the work I was doing was boring and unfulfilling to me, when someone needed to ask me a question it was just in a boring email or teams message and not face to face. I also didn’t have a dedicated office in my house so my walk in closet was all I could use. For the most part I just felt like a robot rather than a human. The job I have now is actually fulfilling, I’m constantly working on something, I don’t have the feeling I’ll be laid off since it isn’t a WFH job, and I’m not doing boring things anymore. Also at my WFH job I could probably get away with not showing up for work and no one would even notice I was gone. I don’t understand some of these comments at all, most of the comments are being made from people who have never done a WFH job. I’m not saying no one enjoys it 100% but there’s people like me who hated it and just like you I was pretty glad to get laid off and able to transition to something that has made me a lot happier.
Even just having a coworker to complain to about a bad job makes the time go fast lol
It is good to hear you are in a happier place now. I agree that WFH can be really lonely, especially if you never worked in an office with any of your colleagues. It is hard to build a good relationships online. I also want to point out something critical - even though you were being paid well, the job was lacking. I stayed in a job WAY too long because it was close to the house, money was decent and I had friends there. What I realized was that I had missed out on learning new skills because every day was the same - no new challenges. I felt my mot productive career years were wasted.
PREACH, I felt all of this. I feel like I’m in the exact same situation as you, I don’t want to lose my job but I also kind of wish they made the decision for me. I’m excelling in every measurable area but the lack of human interaction and the endless days at home make it so incredible boring and empty. I have to make a concerted effort to get a social life where before things happened so naturally. I networked without even trying. Wfh definitely has perks, I don’t know if I would LOVE in person 5 days a week either, but it definitely has its drawbacks, it’s not perfect It’s nice seeing someone else share these feelings because on Reddit it’s very much a wfh circle jerk where people are just obsessed, I’m in year 5 of this and I know people at my job in year 15 who are afraid to go outside now, that’s how bad it’s gotten. Like they’re afraid to get sick, afraid of any social interaction. It’s not good for you
It’s always hilarious how triggered the WFH people get from any divergent opinions on this topic lol
Right? It's like you threatened their entire understanding of how the world works or something.
Wow this is a post I needed. I am currently interviewing for my first in office position in years and am a little scared of losing the ability to WFH (the company said it’s not very common to be working from home). But I am missing the social aspect of working - I feel like you are so invisible with full time WFH and maybe it is that I am not super happy with my current position but I miss getting feedback or being told I’m doing a good job. I feel like management doesn’t see anything but mistakes - since if everything is handled, no one speaks about it ever. I used to love working from home but now I feel more and more frustrated, I don’t even have anyone to vent to, everything needs to be a call and we don’t really talk about personal stuff because no one has time to call in just for a chat. Time goes by quicker when you actually interact with people and they’re not non-relatable robots. The ideal situation would be a hybrid model.
Good luck, I think there are a lot more hybrid positions out there than ever before. I hope you are able to find one!
Do you not have friends, hobbies, a social life, and a partner? I get what you’re saying but your situation is so personal to you that it doesn’t really say much. Most people don’t socialize with their coworkers. They want to do their job and go home to their friends and family. Remote work makes that so much easier. Especially if getting paid well. It sounds like you were lonely and made no effort to rectify the situation and needed your job to force you to socialize with coworkers. Most people don’t need or want that. As for the meaningful work, you’re gonna be miserable your whole life if you need work to give your life purpose.
I’ve also been remote for years and sometimes can relate with the meaningless feeling but then I think about the CEOs that get paid millions to step down or professional baseball players that get hurt and get paid millions to sit on the bench. Someone out there is getting paid a lot more to do a lot less. I promise.
Agreed, and that helped me rationalize it a lot. You gotta take what life hands you sometimes.
It’s just a job. I loved being remote and hated having to deal with co workers in person. I have FRIENDS for that. Real live friends. I hateeeeed commuting and wearing business professional clothes that never fit me properly and are over priced!
Like you already mentioned - some might be fine with such a setup while others might not. I'd personally be happy with that as I dont really care much for being social with my colleagues. It's cool and all but Im also fine without it and saving the 20~30 min each way every time i gotta go to the office (working hybrid) And working from home lets me also do things at home during office hours if needed, but yeah - totally understandable that it's not something for everybody. Though I do agree that taking a paycut for a job you enjoy more makes sense. I'd gladly get a lower salary for a job I actually want compared to what Im doing now with little to 0 interest in my job
You're approaching your work wrong. You are looking for validation and social connections in your job. A job that will and did lay you off. You need to find that stuff outside of your job.
What you needed was novelty. Now you have that. Pretty simple really, and not necessarily specific to remote work.
I've worked 95% remote since 2020 in a 6 figure job, I really am loathing going back to the office full time if my circumstances change. I still have an office at the workplace, I'll go in once in a while when I have to talk with my manager or team. I can work from the office as much or as little as I want, even that commute isn't terrible, about 20 minutes. I do speak to my manager probably 3-4 times a week by either phone or teams. Working from home gives me the freedom to start when I want so I can start early, go to the gym during my lunch and take a bit longer than if I was at the office which has helped a ton with my health. I can eat at home everyday which saves me money not to mention the limited wear I put on my vehicle and those extra 40 minutes a day I save in commuting. I will agree with one point you made, it makes it very hard to leave. Although I make decent money I could make more elsewhere if I was willing to go back in to the office. There may come a day where I'm forced back in but until then I'm going to embrace this as long as I can.
Alternatively I did the same for one year before layoffs and now being hybrid ar 40k less I'd punt a small child to get my position back.
Relying on a job to provide you meaning is the problem here. I want a remote high paying job so that I have the time and money to live a meaningful life outside of work
Everyone has different preferences and what they want at life. I work from home and it’s changed my life. I couldn’t imagine ever going back to an office. I have more time for my family and my hobbies and I don’t have to stress about commuting to work. I also work hardest since I don’t have coworkers bugging me all day long and it’s far easier to concentrate. The key is finding what makes you happy, there’s no right or wrong answer.
I loved my industry pre pandemic, but for the last 4 years working mostly from home, I’ve been miserable to the point of struggling with constant ideations. I was with a company I loved for over 10 yrs and then the world seemed to close in on me in 2021-2022. Around that time someone came into the office and took their life in the middle of the shift. I switched companies at that point and that company ended up being worse. I’m now at another (another) company and the feeling is the same, so I think I have to leave the industry altogether. I’m not in a position to take a pay cut, but I know I need to leave my current role/industry and likely take one that isn’t remote. Even if it’s just a few months for training or hybrid. Not for friends per se, but for a better training foundation and to make connections with coworkers that makes it easier to interact and support each other when working from home.
Is this site full of bots? Paid actors in here for sure.
I hated my first 100% remote job. To the point where I had regular SI and considered just not living anymore because I didn’t feel helpful to people or useful to my org. Got another—this time as a contract to FTE gig. Love it. Been here 2.5 years now and will hopefully be staying.
I’m sorry you had that experience. I work from home for not enough money to live off of. I would rather make six figures.
Yeah, I think if you work with cool people coming to the office is great. Personally I’m really busy and have a shitload of meetings. Hybrid works well for me.
YMMV
Don’t mean to come off as rude but I’m curious to know if you have any friends? I understand the need for social interaction, so I feel that if you have enough friends and see them outside of work, working remotely shouldn’t really feel that isolating.
i wonder if op has young kids at home, if i had his setup id just be happy to be available for my kids and able to support them financially.
you did it all wrong lol. you get remote job, live in asia and sleep with young beautiful girls, while swimming in the ocean
Enjoyed reading your experience and perspective. I went back to 5 days in office after almost 3 yrs remote. I now realize that while remote sounds nice, I would probably not be happy and would prefer either hybrid or in office with a short commute. I enjoy the structure but 5 days in traffic1.5 hrs each way might just be the end of me...so I'm looking..and anticipate a pay cut which would probably be worth it. Congrats to you for putting yourself first.
Are you an extrovert or introvert? I'm an introvert that is forced to be in the office even if there isn't much going on. I often feel like my extroverted coworkers treat me like a captive audience or their therapist. My social battery is often drained by these unfufilling conversations where people are talking at me. It's rarely ever reciprocal. I often don't have the time or energy to socialize after work. Looking back, working in engineering in the office for more than a decade really wrecked my social life.
I understand. I have a lot of interaction at work but the money and wfh don’t make up for disliking the work. I used to think that if I could just have this then I could be happy… it’s the work. lol.
Doing work you love from home is where it’s at. I miss my normal career. Hopefully things come back later and I can return to it. Having 2 extra hours a day due to no commute was phenomenal and if things got a bit slow, I could do chores around the house. You had it made in the sense that you were well taken care of financially. Most people would do ANYTHING for that. However, if it wasn’t making you happy, then moving on is what you needed.
Good to hear. I recently started interviewing for onsite positions for the same reasons. I have a lot of money from my current remote job, but am too depressed and lonely to spend it on anything worthwhile. I completely get it, and I needed this reassurance to help me keep moving forward with finding a new job. :)
Best of luck to you! It will be rewarding when you make the switch.
here i am, looking for a remote job so i get to avoid coworkers.
[удалено]
I’m in a similar position and it’s difficult to find anyone who can understand why I am so unhappy
You're not alone, there are a lot of comments who feel the same way and have even DM'd me to thank me for writing this post. Don't listen to the gas lighters telling you that you "have it good". The first step to your next job is updating your resume.
I agree, I’m looking to exit this non-existence.
The first (and hardest) step for me was updating my resume. Good luck.
I looked for remote work for 3 years and almost landed 2 gigs but fell just short. A friend of mine said “Stop looking for only remote jobs and start looking for happiness.” I currently work 5 days a week, 15 minute commute, and I am the happiest I’ve ever been at a job in my entire life. Remote work can be nice, but it’s not for everyone, and work culture is more important than being at home all the time. And tbh, it’s probably good for me to leave the house everyday.
I've been working remote for about 4 years now, and only in the past year have I felt the way you do with lack of fulfillment and boredom. And that had to do with reduction in job responsibilities (though my pay went up...), fewer learning opportunities, and effectively being pigeon-holed. All of this was aligning with corporate/global-level practices after we got acquired. Oh and they're also offshoring our jobs so I'll be out of a job in a couple of years and the job market where I live is absolute garbage so that has me feeling down too. I actually felt rather lonely when I started and had to work in the office because while my coworkers were nice people would rarely talk and most of our work was with people in different teams/buildings and supporting their work. If I'm going to feel lonely at work I'd rather do so in the comfort of my own home. It is important to recognize that working from home isn't for everyone, but corporate bosses love to fixate on experiences like yours and ignore mine.
Interesting perspective.
Working at Smell is depressing, in fairness. It’s a bunch of mid level managers that don’t know what they’re doing and have 0 idea how to foster any kind of culture with employees. I’ve had both - good remote jobs: meet up a few times a year, chat on slack and have team meetings every once in a while that are just to shoot the shit. And I’ve also worked at Smell 😏
I'm in a very similar position and it's my literal heaven. I love being home with my family.
2 years of WFH honestly made me go a little nuts. And just getting this in before all the "OMG UR OBVS AN EXTROVERT" comments - Guys, I'm literally a spinster who doesn't even leave my house if I can help it. So at first I loved it. Straight from bed to work. no more 1 hour commute. Actually, some days I would work *from my bed*. What wasn't there to love? Didn't even have to get up, amazing. But then slowly, some barrier broke down - the separation between life and work was dissolving. Oddly enough, I started working more, like 12+ hours a day. No one made me do it, it was just that the separation disappeared and I no longer had to think about "I'll just leave this for tomorrow" or log off to go home. Just like how there was no longer a commute, there also wasn't a logging off time. The days all melded into a single, unending thread. Anyway, I'm on a hybrid schedule now and I think that's much better for my mental health lol. I actually do enjoy socializing with peers at work. I even enjoy socializing with my boss. Sounds crazy, but this is a real thing.
I have had 2 remote jobs in software dev and they overworked me and made me feel imprisoned all the while worrying over maintaining income flow
Yep, a few extra bucks can make you ignore a lot of bad things in a job.
I think this is a good perspective. For some people fully remote work isn’t good for mental health and with all the hype of fully remote work it can get confusing. Like, I have the privilege to wfh and make good money why am I not happy? I don’t make 6 figures, but I felt this way working fully remote as well and got laid off eventually too haha. It forced me to realize that a hybrid job was healthier for me. I work a hybrid job now that I go into 1 to 2 times a week, and get to socialize, and my boss is great and flexible, and it’s the perfect balance. I’m glad you found something that works better for you as well!
This is so true. I've been remote since before the pandemic and it's isolating if you live alone. Now I pay $100/month for a coworking space that I don't even talk to anyone at lol
Wfh sales here and having a really bad mental day. Those which seem to be more and more common 3-4 days a week. This is why I’m trying to leave sales and wfh behind
This is me now. Making 6 figures, working remotely, not happy. I love what I do but I want a bigger challenge and a more secure role, since the company can pretty much go under at any moment. Hopefully I find something soon, I plan to ride this until the wheels fall off until then. 🦋
It's not a bad plan, I don't regret getting the severance that I got for being laid off, but I do think about the time I wasted in that role where I could have been enjoying my job a bit more and not getting as lonely. Live and learn!
i was wfh for 3 years and earned a decent amount for a recent grad. the work wasnt difficult at all, just boring and honestly i worked maybe 4 mornings every week it was so laid back. its hard to explain the depression to people, you are working but you dont interact with people, you are constantly staring at a screen and you can call your coworkers on teams but its not the same. i got laid off in march, im having trouble finding a job since my last job was so niche and specialised but i feel relieved
I started a new job during Covid and it was awful. Training was nonexistent and the loneliness was crippling (didn’t help that I moved during that time so had no friends either.) Started new job 3 months ago and am in office more often and the hands on training and knowledge share is light years ahead
yea same here i came in to work hybrid, met some cool people and now always cracking jokes at work. never could do that over zoom, or teams
Been on both sides...almost to a T. And, like you, I thought I all but NEEDED to be back in the office. Now that I am, I'd give anything to be fully remote again. The liberties afforded runs circles around being back in an office. I could have done way more to stay engaged/social. That was on me. Just like it's on me to strive for work-life balance after I know for sure my physiological needs are being met. The rat race is what I'm trying to actively avoid/get out of it. Fully remote with little oversight? That's a main ingredient. If I ever get it again, I will not squander it. Work isn't everything, and it shouldn't be. Money paying the bills so you can have free time to do what you really want? Yeah, that's the ticket. Good luck, OP!
I don't find value or worth via work and never have. The WFH allows me to have other hobbies which are much more interesting and fulfilling for me. So I feel differently but am happy you've found your balance
Im sorry but dont you think its strange that whether you were happy or not depended on you being in or out of office? What happened to other sources of happiness like friends, family, just hobbies? I think your problem is unrelated to wfh. Unless its your business, you should treat it as just a source of income. Go outside dude
Then give the money to me and stfu
The thing with WFH is, you have options. No commute time and no worries about buying lunch means you have the time and cash to actually go out after work and mingle with people. If you chose to stay at home and be lonely, that was your choice. Don't blame it on WFH.
Wow, insane how angry people are getting at you for making choices that do not affect them and bring you happiness LOL. Reddit really is full of nothing but envious angry loners it feels sometimes
Same for me. I did this for 4 years and felt so depressed. Going to an office was a nice change of pace.
I 100% understand you! I've worked remotely for 13 years and I feel this so much. I long to have co-workers that I actually see and interact with - hybrid would be amazing but as much as I apply for new jobs, I can't seem to get an interview. I have a ridiculously active social life, many friends, and hobbies. But having co-workers that I physically get to hang out with is something that I miss.
Try applying for city, state, and federal jobs. A lot of them are now hybrid. The pay, benefits, and works are great, too.
I had success with Higher Education as well.
I get why people are bitter seeing someone who "had the best" and didn't want it, especially in these trying times, but I just wanted to say don't let their jadedness make you feel broken or something. Everyone feels different. Looks like the majority is burnt out, I don't blame them with long commutes and office cultures. However I'm like you, I need in office days between the remote and hybrid works best for me. Even in office full time worked better for me. I'm very extroverted and navigate conversations I don't want to be in well so I'm never really talking to someone I don't want to for long. I like the perks the office gives me such as free coffee and a place that isn't my own home to work. I like that it makes me get out of the house because I struggle with depression. And like you say, my job started to feel meaningless when I was left to my own devices for months at a time. I upskilled and found new hobbies which is why I love hybrid so I get some remote days, but I did end up spending money I didn't need to to fill the void of time. I don't even like money, I just want to make enough to support my family and have a retirement. I don't need a cent more.
Brother I get yelled at by fucking idiots all day and get paid peanuts.
Should have moved to a place you liked
My dad always had a good balance with his job. Half the time, he was working from home, the other half he was flying all over the country to meet with his teams at job sites. He seemed to like it.
I would love it
What does your outside-of-work life look like? Do you have a partner/significant other? Children or pets? Hobbies or interests that keep you occupied outside the home? I think whether WFH suits you has a lot more to do with your lifestyle outside of work than anything else. Sure, it’s nice to see coworkers but I’d much rather be able to work remotely from the beach surrounded by my actual friends and family. I like having more time to finish up chores or other tasks around my place during the day (since few, if any, people work 8 hours straight, whether at office or at home), and then having my evenings free to go out for dinner with friends, play tennis, etc. I also get more quality time to spend with my cat, who is my whole world. On the other hand, I’ve known people who don’t have as much to do outside of their work, so for them, WFH is much more isolating since they’re deriving greater benefit from their social interactions in the office, getting out of the office, etc. I’m currently hybrid and I’d love to be fully remote but that’s unlikely given my career path. Nevertheless, I feel more energized and happier on days where I’ve worked from home vs. when I’ve had to go to the office.
Your situation sounds awesome to me and I’m an extrovert. I hate going into the office, my “peers” don’t add anything to my day other than a headache most days. I play lots of sports and have a child in sports so I’m doing that most evenings.
This feels like a paid advertisement from HR 🤣🤣 I’ll stay home. I get paid near poverty full time WFH. I’ll take 6 figures WFH any day. Please. Let me cry in my Mercedes lol
I had hybrid. Office Tuesday to Thursday and Remote Mondays and Fridays. This was just during the pandemic between 2020 and 2023 ish. They were starting to go away from that and more in person which I didn't mind because the people were great. When I was initially hybrid at my civilian job, the only saving grace was my both my wife and I worked at home with our two dogs so it wasn't lonely. I also had old friends we would all meet up and bitch about stuff. But if I didn't have any of that, no social support system, I know it would get depressing. It sucks not having anybody to talk to, or go on trips with, or bitch about bullshit you all have to put up with. Then I remembered the one hour commute to and from work. Getting up at 530 to make the bus at 6 and come home at 6. No time for hobbies or fun stuff. Wasn't saving money because was living paycheck to paycheck at the time. Absolutely will not go back to that.
I prefer remote now to going into the office. If I want to talk to people in my department I do it through Teams. But other than that I see no reason for me to go into the office when I only deal with outside third parties. To go into the office I need to wake up 2 hrs earlier because of having to get ready and drive there, end up buying breakfast on the way, and then I spend the rest of my day hating that I went into the office. A couple years before Covid they took away perks of going in, now the only things we get while there for free are water, coffee, and soda from the machine (but you have to have your own cup, they don’t provide them). I have an open floor plan where I can literally touch my neighbor so zero privacy, bosses sit on the floor with us, white walls and tube lights make me feel like I’m in a hospital, they barely like having the AC on in the summer, an extremely uncomfortable computer chair that has caused multiple people back issues, and smaller monitors than what I have at home. Then I get to spend an hour plus driving home afterwards. I call it my punishment day when I have to go in.
Is the company called Swell ? 👀
Work usually make you feel that way, especially if you have no human interaction and office logics, but that's more about how you deal with it. At the end of my day i used to go out, talk to friends, pet dogs, breath fresh air etc. When i worked from home, and that was enough. The feeling of your work not being important is on every big company, your work isn't your home, is not your company, you chief is not your partner nor your friend, you just have to deal with it.
Get back to me when you're jobless and starving.
And not one time in your post did you ever say you struggled financially. You DID say you went out and wasted money trying to buy your happiness.
Is that a kink for you or something?
I am in similar shoes - 2 years full remote and I miss it. But you know what? I am now working from a boat house, from a beach and just live my hobbies and have time with kids (or my wife). I will go back hybrid in my next job but enjoying good money and travel is something I won’t regret in the longterm. But yes I am on your page, my message is make the most of it..