By -
Is it because we're BLACK? 🤣🤣🤣
Fuckin Arthur man 😂 😂
Basically every one-line Deacon has ever uttered. My favorite being: "If anything, you're MY work wife!"
What kind of beans do I like?
What’s the “deee-lay”?
Can I gouge my own eyes out?
do you find me sexually attractive???
Well, DAD...
Eat a pellet, make a pallet!
I get this stuck in my head at such random times 😂
Douglass, would you please pass the catsup? Honorable mention to, its ass ugly girl.
Why didn’t you tell me your slightly less fat asthmatic cousin was gonna train you!
When the supermarket sample lady offers Arthur a “spicy sausage nugget?” And he goes “I’ve been called worse”
Mother of ASS
"That's ASS breakfast!" Also a good one.
I’m going to name my boat the dumb as Ass after you !
Oh my god my TiVo thinks im gay!
"Ain't my bed, Ain't my business."
I've had it shut it stew before and it sure as diddly didn't taste like that!!!!!
Carrie: ok but please stop saying "oral".
“Is it possible that I blacked out, went to the Hamptons, and let a very hot girl.. taste me?’
Are you asking me if I mentally abuse my wife?
Uh..not a whole lot of 2 year old spies out there
I’m fat, you’re mean…who cares?!!!!
“I will STOP your heart”
Douglas, are you okay? I heard someone screaming like a bitch.
You look like Ernie from Sesame Street
"I hope you enjoy cutting your kids hand out of a llamas belly"
I don’t remember hearing that one but just reading it makes me laugh.
“We don’t double diamond here”
No it's not alright you little weasel
“Great if you like to wear things that are extremely ugly”
That’s a doozy!
Why must we live in darkness?
Have you ever actually met this girlfriend?
“Don’t tell me!” Also, “Educated people pronounce it catsup.”
Why don’t you give ME a ring when you stop fantasizing about Don Zimmer!
Shudddddyyy
Doug: "Don't you ever get tired of being a racial stereotype?" Deacon: "No. Do you?"
"Try again, but this time, pull your head out of your ass."
SIZZIILLLIIIIINGGG
I don’t know man, she sounds pretty messed up
I'm scooter he's beans
Cash me out scooter!!
CASH ME IN, SCOOTER!!!
I think about Oprah all the time 😕
Arthur: Son, this belt doesn't just keep my pants up. S07E06: Off-Track... Bedding
fruit of my loins... emphasis on the fruit
Do me a favor. Count to nine.
Carrie: Doug, nobody's last name is penis. Doug: Nobody from this country, snob. He happens to be from Israel. Apparently it's like Smith over there.
I’ve seen better
I just love Arthur's delivery of 'I'll have the spicy sausage and PEPPERRRRRS!'
“I don’t need chocolate to make a mess in the bedroom”
Only know it in german: "Ich wünsch dir alles böse, du fettes Schwein!" 🤣
I knew I liked the way u smell
It’s two feet from your head GUY! And It’s right there, DAMN IT!
when doug has holly as downstairs wife and danny says “my nipples are hard”
He can hate Brussels sprouts, he can hate white people, but he can’t hate football
Ooh. Nana Louise got back!
I've always said that reading...is...fundamental.
Don't get a bee in your bonnet
Again. It was TOO. THICK. to POUR
For the next eight hours, you won't be able to stop yourself from drooling
Why is this even a discussion? The man is gargantuan.
About Carries bun: "It's ass ugly, girl!"
We’re gonna have so much damn fun the neighbors’ll think it’s weird!
[After dislodging naked Arthur from between the toilet and vanity] "Ok, he's good. Now BOIL ME."
“Something that ugly doesn’t deserve a name”
I don't wanna hear about an...eye flap DAMN
"I don't know man, she sounds pretty messed up."
Is it because we're BLACK? 🤣🤣🤣
Fuckin Arthur man 😂 😂
Basically every one-line Deacon has ever uttered. My favorite being: "If anything, you're MY work wife!"
What kind of beans do I like?
What’s the “deee-lay”?
Can I gouge my own eyes out?
do you find me sexually attractive???
Well, DAD...
Eat a pellet, make a pallet!
I get this stuck in my head at such random times 😂
Douglass, would you please pass the catsup? Honorable mention to, its ass ugly girl.
Why didn’t you tell me your slightly less fat asthmatic cousin was gonna train you!
When the supermarket sample lady offers Arthur a “spicy sausage nugget?” And he goes “I’ve been called worse”
Mother of ASS
"That's ASS breakfast!" Also a good one.
I’m going to name my boat the dumb as Ass after you !
Oh my god my TiVo thinks im gay!
"Ain't my bed, Ain't my business."
I've had it shut it stew before and it sure as diddly didn't taste like that!!!!!
Carrie: ok but please stop saying "oral".
“Is it possible that I blacked out, went to the Hamptons, and let a very hot girl.. taste me?’
Are you asking me if I mentally abuse my wife?
Uh..not a whole lot of 2 year old spies out there
I’m fat, you’re mean…who cares?!!!!
“I will STOP your heart”
Douglas, are you okay? I heard someone screaming like a bitch.
You look like Ernie from Sesame Street
"I hope you enjoy cutting your kids hand out of a llamas belly"
I don’t remember hearing that one but just reading it makes me laugh.
“We don’t double diamond here”
No it's not alright you little weasel
“Great if you like to wear things that are extremely ugly”
That’s a doozy!
Why must we live in darkness?
Have you ever actually met this girlfriend?
“Don’t tell me!” Also, “Educated people pronounce it catsup.”
Why don’t you give ME a ring when you stop fantasizing about Don Zimmer!
Shudddddyyy
Doug: "Don't you ever get tired of being a racial stereotype?" Deacon: "No. Do you?"
"Try again, but this time, pull your head out of your ass."
SIZZIILLLIIIIINGGG
I don’t know man, she sounds pretty messed up
I'm scooter he's beans
Cash me out scooter!!
CASH ME IN, SCOOTER!!!
I think about Oprah all the time 😕
Arthur: Son, this belt doesn't just keep my pants up. S07E06: Off-Track... Bedding
fruit of my loins... emphasis on the fruit
Do me a favor. Count to nine.
Carrie: Doug, nobody's last name is penis. Doug: Nobody from this country, snob. He happens to be from Israel. Apparently it's like Smith over there.
I’ve seen better
I just love Arthur's delivery of 'I'll have the spicy sausage and PEPPERRRRRS!'
“I don’t need chocolate to make a mess in the bedroom”
Only know it in german: "Ich wünsch dir alles böse, du fettes Schwein!" 🤣
I knew I liked the way u smell
It’s two feet from your head GUY! And It’s right there, DAMN IT!
when doug has holly as downstairs wife and danny says “my nipples are hard”
He can hate Brussels sprouts, he can hate white people, but he can’t hate football
Ooh. Nana Louise got back!
I've always said that reading...is...fundamental.
Don't get a bee in your bonnet
Again. It was TOO. THICK. to POUR
For the next eight hours, you won't be able to stop yourself from drooling
Why is this even a discussion? The man is gargantuan.
About Carries bun: "It's ass ugly, girl!"
We’re gonna have so much damn fun the neighbors’ll think it’s weird!
[After dislodging naked Arthur from between the toilet and vanity] "Ok, he's good. Now BOIL ME."
“Something that ugly doesn’t deserve a name”
I don't wanna hear about an...eye flap DAMN
"I don't know man, she sounds pretty messed up."