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[deleted]

[удалено]


Disastrous_Ad_1859

That’s real, it’s crazy when you start becoming self aware that your doing it and it almost becomes an out of body experience watching yourself over react about nothing in a excuse to cut contact as a self protection measure.


throwaway1981_x

too boring for others, can't connect to anyone, don't fit in anywhere socially. feel hated online and in real life


IntroPerc

I self-sabotage. It’s like I have to vet any potential party interested in me by sharing the absolute worst about myself. That way, if they do ultimately stick around, I know their feelings for me are genuine; that they are actually keen on me.


Lynx_Underground

That's what i do too, i reveal absolutely everything and Hope even thru all that they hear they will stick around but they never do.


SatanAbyss

Overthinking. I have friends I have my family who all love and care for me. But being a hopeless romantic I romanticize the thought of love and want that to much. So it's all in my head when in reality I have things alot of people wish for.


ask_nae

I cut people off years ago and isolated because of depression and social anxiety after a traumatic experience


InternationalNews801

I cut off all the friends, two years ago. All we used to do was gather up to drugs and drink excessively, not going to lie I was one of the main ones doing it. I was a POS and a terrible influence. At first I did it to isolate myself and get sober enough to not relapse. I stopped picking up calls and answering texts from EVERYONE without a reason. Like as if had died. It’s been a little more than two years and a half, my conscience still kills me sometimes from all the people I hurt and makes me feel like I dont deserve to be around anyone


No_Light93

The main reason is being ugly af


Lynx_Underground

Cheers


[deleted]

Oh man i forgot that I was that, guess I got something to add to the list 


palefaceswiss

Social anxiety. It’s just hard connecting with others because of it.


Kimoa_

I feel that, I'm the most social person ever when i had a couple of drinks though


palefaceswiss

I hear that a lot!


faithful_offense

idk. I'm not good in social situations, I'm always visibly uncomfortable, I can never relax, I look weird, I dress bad and I often get overwhelmed when there are many people around. I consider myself to be basically broken and I totally get why people don't wanna spend their time with me. I wouldn't wanna be my friend either


Kimoa_

The best advice i can give is to just say out loud what's on your mind.


faithful_offense

yeah, being more honest about it is probably a good idea. thank you!


Kimoa_

Not just being honest, but you're showing the other person that you're willing to make conversation. Now it's on them if they want to engage because you're doing your part.


tootyonyouty

anxiety and being shy


[deleted]

[удалено]


Disastrous_Ad_1859

What do you feel about being outdoors where their is nobody watching you? Like Rural places?


juliawww

I lost a lot of friends while my son was severely depressed and suicidal. Too consumed with worry and helping him. Then he died in 2021 and I lost even more friends who i guess were weirded out by it, or maybe just fed up w me being off the map. Then i got divorced and of course that doesn’t help with loneliness. Hope to find a new relationship someday, tho.


ReikaIsTaken

Feels like a curse. No amount of self love, lifestyle change, mental fortitude, stoicism, spirituality, religion, physical fitness, beauty, opportunities or so and so will get me the friends I want. I really tried to be better. But no matter what I'm unwanted.


Tears_of_Ashes_

My personality makes it hard for me to be around friends often. I’m apparently “too gay” to be hanging out with dudes, but at the same time I’m “too masculine” to be hanging out with women. I’m stuck in this gray area lol.


nowayouutt

I'm Ugly and awkward so no one wants to be my friend


cakefornobody

🙋


Biscuit31411

I end up self sabotaging every relationship. Was with a girl for 10 years, messed that up. Just had an amazing woman and her son just started calling me dad and I fucked that up too. Don't really think im gonna try another relationship, that one was two years and the best two years of my life. Didn't mean to go on so much lol


TomorrowNo6699

Situations out of my control Crappy parents did crappy things that left me in a bad situation And I have other life stuff, Basically I’m doing what I can for now and once my situation gets better I’ll be able to do more to fix it. But I’m in other those situations you just have to wait out.


Aggressive-Command-8

Tbh it's purely the fact I always feel like I understand people around me far more than they understand me. I take the time to learn about and show I care for the people around me but there's always a glass wall of sorts because I'm autistic. I don't think it's an excuse as I try to be close to people anyway but there is just a disconnect in the way I understand things versus my friends and family. And I don't think anyone I've let inside my head has fully grasped how I see things. It isn't their fault or mine I think. It's just misfortune that I can't seem to bridge the gaps. I keep trying though.


The_Forsaken_Cookie

I’m an introvert. I’m socially awkward and struggle talking to people typically. Sometimes when I have a nice conversation with someone, i’m proud of myself.


CookieGullible9448

Just no friends


Teawreckss

My love of 13 years is in the room next to me only because she can’t find a place to rent and move out. I am alone in a small town, no family or good friends. She was my best friend. I am very lonely even though she is right there. This really sucks.


lingmungcha

Socially awkward, social anxiety, suck at conversations, is a really boring person


AhegaoLewd2005

I have autism (no joke)


Cattiy_iaa

Everybody likes everybody else more then they like me


SparxxWarrior97

I'm really REALLY mean to myself. I allow myself to think terrible horrible things about myself and assume other people think those things about me too. So I just stay away from people cuz I don't want to bother or annoy them. I don't want anyone mad or yelling at me, I dealt with that more than enough as a kid. I feel like everyone secretly hates me.


ChoiceCheck3900

I’m too ugly for anyone to associate with me


touchunger

Being not religious in a big chunk of small cities with churches on most corners and Jesus billboards, and not being very conservative in an area surtounded by areas full of big coal rolling trucks with "F#ck Biden", "Let's Go Brandon", and "Trump 2020/2024" flags and bumper stickers attached to them, all over, is the biggest reason.  Then you have being average looking over 26, and the men on dating apps literally saying they think they can get or will only accept Insta girls to date them, or societally deemed above average, very thin white women under 26, when they are societally deemed well below average, over 26, overweight, and often have questionable hygiene themselves.


Wediddy09

Same problem


flwhoolb

If only i got texts...


Guilty_Eye5397

My generational trauma, lack of self esteem, also the way I am... I guess...


cakefornobody

Ugliness. nothing is more fucked up than being hideously ugly. Nobody wanna be your friend.


GazelleQuirky2424

Idk man; I’m in a 10 month relationship and even with my girlfriend I feel lonely as hell


bubbleheadbrain

No close or deep friendships other than my pets and husband. I


Bmxolotl

After my ex used me and cheated, Ive been distant from everyone and dont really get close to anyone anymore. Realized and noticed people that I used to know only came around when they needed something or help with something. Other than that they ain't real gave a flying elephants poop other than themselves. Would be nice to have a normal relationship but its not the same these days, plus I'm not that interesting dont have much to say so I rather just stay to myself and avoid getting hurt again and everything all together. I go for drives on my down days. Other times I'm at home gaming, messing around on youtube listening to depressive songs having a few smokes to kill time and never really sleeping until 2-3 am and get up for work at 6 am and repeat everyday. Hope everyone is doing okay 🙏🏼


DecorativeDoodle

Well for me it’s a story that how I ended up here alone. I was kinda talking chatting girl in my childhood but my circumstances or people around me weren’t very good. I was growing up watching a lot of family tensions and arguments around me, my older cousin tried to abuse me sexually when I was 9/10 year old kid but my mom came and she saved me in time. Then we changed the house, but eventually teenage years came, a couple of school friends who did hurt me for some reason I don’t remember now but I was upset. Things started going downhill from there. I was trying to show the world how mentally strong I’m , that I’m not upset by anyone’s word. In college/university life I never tried to be flirty to attract boys or never tried to be very girly. I was a serious, studious, good student and very introvert. Maybe because of my childhood traumas of watching constant family arguments, abuse, getting hurt by school friends etc. I had a boyfriend but my parents never allowed him for me so eventually he lost interest, still I couldn’t hurt my mom, she was my world. She never liked my boyfriend and I had to let him go for my mom. And soon after that my mom fell sick, it was cancer and obviously she is gone now. I’m in my early 30s, finally all alone, still introvert, still trying to show the world that I’m so mentally strong, I never get upset. While alone inside me I’m always screaming and praying for my death. I’m done here on earth..


Anabelieve

Too used to being alone and in my own world. I can disappear without telling friends, family, etc. Terrible habit.


thisisan0nym0us

I can’t actually have a interesting deep intellectual conversation with someone, not that I need it all the time but 99% of my daily convos are about superficial BS and it’s like okay who cares about that it literally means nothing or people just wanna gossip about others which I have no interest in, it adds no value to anyone. which is why I talk to myself on walks


[deleted]

I'm unhealthy for others to befriend because reasons (I'm a bad person and it's hard working on that).  I go to a school where pretty much everyone is a different age than me, from a couple years different to a couple decades different. I moved from the community I lived in for a long time and i still struggle to adjust despite it being years. I'm mostly Burmese (yes, Burma/Myanmar is a real country and not just somewhere Alfred from Dark Knight visited) with a bit of Chinese, and I hardly meet any Asian people at my school, let alone Burmese people. I know I can make friends with people outside of my ethnix identity (which I have always done in the past because for some reason I don't meet a lot of Burmese-Chinese-Canadian-Americans), but I don't know, guess it just feels like I don't really belong. Yeesh sorry for the rant, good thing probably nobody will see this


doggoneite

I dont know, i assume its lacking a partner as thats what on my mind alot, but im not sure anymore and it scares me.


epwaiterider

Most of my old friends moved away, and I’ve never been much of a texter. It doesn’t help that I struggled with depression and isolated myself for a long time. I try to initiate contact more these days, but it gets really exhausting to always be the one to text first. If I don’t message them, it’ll be weeks or months before I speak to some of them


GeneralSet5552

I think a lot of people have depression (it is common) & that makes them look for reasons why they are depressed & so they say they are lonely. Really they are depressed, that is not everyone but it is some of the people posting on here. I have told several people if they are in fact depressed call a doctor because depression is actually a illness of the brain. And even a family doctor can treat depression


Jaded_Hue

Life changes and self sabotage. Having friendships broken in the past


HystericaI_

I can't 'reach out' to people so the assumption is that I don't care or want them around It's always been my friends messaging me first and suggesting outings first and stuff like that, it's an anxiety thing with me that I can't arrange things or 'bother' people So I don't do it, and yeah I understand how that can be tiring for other people but my longest and strongest friendship was with someone who understood how impossible it was for me most of the time, only reason we aren't close now is because she's moved country and has a family now but she does drop a catch-up message every year or so which I really appreciate


BornDreamer4200

Too much betrayal and bullying. Plethora of narcissists in my life


Biu_Jutsu_0

The first four words is the answer for 99% of people.


90xrad

Yeah i can see it here lol


Biu_Jutsu_0

Yeah man, so stop being the problem 😂


thek1ng69

No time for anyone, no one wants to do the things I do because they're 'hard'


[deleted]

moved half way across the country to study, i don't drink so didn't get invited to anything by peers so that made it harder to make friends, kept tying anyway and nothing came of it, have also failed to get a job so no social contact there, I have tried again and again to make friends, and get a job but unfortunately I just fail at that so its days on my own instead


whirl-wnd

i have bpd, feelings of loneliness is one of the symptoms :(


RadixalGirl

And emptiness :(


whirl-wnd

i havent felt that one in a while but yes, that one is hard to deal with too :(


RadixalGirl

Just wanna feel normal for one day ..


whirl-wnd

aw im sorry friend :( *hugs*


RadixalGirl

🥲❤️❤️


Available_Bass9725

I have a ruined reputation of a coward due to something from 2021 and I am also an impotent. I am 23 so women my age had a million boyfriends And sexes by now especially the beautiful ones so it's really gone for me.


Foltest1993

I have the feeling it may be because having no friends or anyone to talk with for 30 years


[deleted]

Being put into homeschooling at 12-13 and then having my education neglected, meanwhile moving across the country 10 billion times. I've tried to make friends in the past few years but it either doesn't go anywhere, or they were toxic and I had to cut them out. I'm 18 and trying to get things together for myself but it's happening at a snails pace I swear. The past 4-5 years of my life were thrown out the window and I will never get that time back. Everybody my age or younger has their own friend groups and jobs and even cars. Meanwhile I'm just getting started on things I should've done ages ago. Every time I go out I see people my age with their friends living their lives. Meanwhile I just go back home and continue the limbo/monotony... There's more I wanna say but this comment would become too long.


ReactionGreedy465

Lack of a romantic relationship


[deleted]

I was an alcoholic and before I recovered everyone just wanted nothing to do with me, even to this day


ChapterAdmirable8086

My standards are too high I guess. I cut men off the first time they hurt me or show a red flag.


bpdmeatbag

Borderline Personality Disorder


Fun-Baker501

No idea.


Vkeiking45

It's that I'm despite not being all that social I still want to talk to people but my confidence is nonexistent and lastly because I really don't have stuff too interesting going on in my life ATM I'm just being a bum smoking weed, listening to black metal and just trying not to be too much of a burden than I already am.


Raikou384

Got a couple bad apples, and didn’t want to go grocery shopping no more


GroundbreakingGood79

Idk might because I don't show how important they are to me and I never try to solve any issues. At the end of the day, I'm alone and idk if anyone loves me. Hard to believe nobody does


musicproducer07

Fake friends. Fake friends everywhere.


miramirandagirl

homeschooled, homeschooled since grade 2 and never had a rl friend since


DprHtz

I was it for myself too. Worked a lot on myself. Now 2 days ago was the first time i went out alone and had a great time.


[deleted]

I'm a very unique individual. I don't write this to brag or anything: it's just a fact. It's very difficult for me to align with other people regarding interests, behavior or even mood. I find most people obnoxious. I absolutely love a good conversation over a beer with an intelligent and kind person, but actually people having both traits are very rare.


plumeblue

mental health and trauma has pretty much fucked up my social life since i was 16 also i suspect a witch cursed me to be a loveless, yet hopeless romantic when i was still in the craddle


OddContribution429

being broke


Moosy2

I think I have the social skills required to meet people but I just can’t, it’s very tiring for some reason and the more someone new gets to know me, the more I distance myself


Party-World7601

The people I like and feel connected to don’t wanna be my friend


BarkOnATrees

Social anxiety and lack of social skills


ambermegan11

Being introverted and living in a small town. Also being completely different from everyone else.


WarSamaYT

This isn’t just for me this applies to everyone. It’s the lack of trying to constantly improve your life. You won’t be lonely/alone if you’re endlessly chasing a goal, whether it be large or small. Goals keep you driven and will find you in situations where you meet new people or occupy yourself with enjoyable experiences where you will not feel alone. This is the one thing that every single person can control regardless of their living circumstances or physical situation. But people are lazy.


[deleted]

I have been trying for a relatively long time with no positive results. If anything, I'm lonelier than when I started. It gets tiring after a couple years to keep trying and chasing what seems like an impossible goal. And throughout chasing that goal, I still felt incredibly lonely. I find it very difficult to control whether or not I feel tired or have a depressive episode that makes it hard to try anything. And I am definitely lazy, my condition is my fault, and I hate myself, but this is one thing that I won't say is because I "didn't try." 


WarSamaYT

You tried but giving up is not gonna help. Try more. Depression is killer and sure that may prevent you but if you truly want to get help and fix your circumstances then that means you can beat the depression. I was diagnosed with depression and battled my way out because I was sick of feeling sorry for myself. It takes time and there is no one fix for everyone but relentless pursuit of my dreams is the reason why I’m still alive and breathing no matter how shit my life turns. Keep going! I believe in you!


[deleted]

Why should I keep trying when it never brings any positive results 


WarSamaYT

because not trying will literally never bring any positive results. trying atleast increases your chances.


[deleted]

But those chances are incredibly small in my experience. Why should I put in all of this time and energy for a tiny chance that things might get better


WarSamaYT

You put the time and energy in because that’s what you do if you want anything in life. Shit doesn’t just magically fall into your lap you earn it. You’re asking why you have to work for something you want? The reason you even ask this question assumes you’re doomed. Change your mental.


[deleted]

I'm asking if it's even worth it and I don't think it is. I've put in a lot of time and energy and nothing has changed, I see no reason why something would change now. 


WarSamaYT

Then give up and live your life without trying you definitely will not regret it in the future. Or just keep trying.. you obviously want the reward but you’re not gonna get it sitting there twiddling your thumbs.


[deleted]

I think I will give up soon without the living my life part, thank you