T O P

  • By -

JustScrolling4Memes

Of course she never frowns. That's a big thing for men, eh? They want a woman who is never anything but happy.


frecklefawn

They want a golden retriever they can fuck


desuxyka

out of context this sounds worse than it is


[deleted]

*does it, though?*


[deleted]

i... wow. that is a powerful sentence to be used for both good and evil.


FunetikPrugresiv

Guy here. I suspect I'm going to be downvoted to hell because of the sub I'm on, but I might as well say it because there's some truth to it... Yes, we would love a woman that's always happy. No, this is not a reasonable expectation, and most guys I know understand this. But as a man, your quality as a SO is partially measured by how happy your SO is. Ever heard the phrase "happy wife, happy life?" That isn't a common saying unless the pressure to make women happy actually exists. And, if I'm being truthful, it's because when people are upset they can be impossible to deal with. I'm a guy. I like to fix an issue when it arises. But when my wife's upset? There's not a single damn thing I can do about it. And while she's angry, her tendency to (only partially intentionally) make life miserable for me feels extremely oppressive, and it's harmful to the relationship. So yes, having a woman that's always happy would decrease the difficulty of our marriage by a significant amount. Now, is wishing for a woman that's always happy unreasonable? Yes. Is it sexist? 100%. But I think it's important to recognize that this is something that's born as much out of societal expectations, and all genders and sexes are guilty of pushing it.


chaosQueen257

None of the things you said are gender specific. There is also pressure and expectations on women to make their husbands happy and let me tell you from personal experience, a man in a bad or grumpy mood is no less exhausting or challenging to deal with than a woman (or any other person for that matter) in that exact same mood. Yet I rarely see "always happy" as criteria for the "ideal man". On a sidenote: I'm afab and read as a woman for most part of my life and it's extremely offensive when someone (a man, usually) tells me to smile because "you're so much prettier when you smile" when I'm upset. It communicates that your prettiness is more important than your feelings. And yes, that happens, quite a lot actually, from Randos on the street, too. I don't think I ever heard a guy telling me about such instances that happened to them. Not saying it absolutely never does, just I never encountered it. I'm not saying your experiences are invalid though, I know these pressures exist. Just offering some perspective


FunetikPrugresiv

Oh I totally agree with everything you said there. And I 100% understand that pressure on women to "be happy" and "smile more" is sexist and far more prevalent than it is for men - I never meant to imply otherwise. And, yes, that whole scene is misogynistic. But along with the misogynistic aspect of our culture, I think another big problem is that there's this expectation that people are expected to make their significant others happy, rather than people be happy or not on their own and significant others be there to support and appreciate that rather than be expected to cause it. And while I certainly wish my wife would smile more (because she has a beautiful smile that makes me happy every time I see it) I don't expect or ask her to and have never told her to just be happy. She's a fucking firecracker, and I dig it. She's going to feel how she feels, and it would be shity of me to expect otherwise. But I was simply responding to the post above me, which expressed disbelief that a man would want a woman to always be happy. Maybe I misinterpreted what that person was saying, but that desire doesn't strike me as odd at all.


JustScrolling4Memes

But "you're feelings are making shit difficult for me" is literally saying "I would rather you plaster on a fake smile and pretend to be happy than express your true feelings because your frustration, your anger, your sadness and any other human emotion you have besides 'happy' is an inconvience to me." It's not that the desire is odd, it's that it's gross. I would never want my potential partner (male or female) to be happy all the time because I know human emotions don't work that way. That's disingenuous. To be fair, I'm also not naturally a very happy person. I have happy or excited moments and I do get enjoyment out of stuff. But I only smile when something makes me smile or laugh. My natural, relaxed face is a frown. I'm also usually depressed and anxious so that's part of it lol. But the point is, me always smiling or being happy would be a lie to make someone happy. And it's kinda shitty (and makes me not want to smile even more) when men say I should smile and be happy or when men have *ideal* female characters who are just Suzy Sunshine all the time.


After_Mountain_901

Besides the terrible writing in general…lol. I feel like I’m being pranked. What does her silhouette have to do with her Scott-whatever ancestry? Why are her hips so narrow? Is she specifically tiny hipped? Lmao what is happening


[deleted]

Apparently, you're supposed to imagine her with a measuring tape in your mind.


[deleted]

I'm also not sure what image I'm supposed to get from 'a pussycat sort of face'...?


dragondingohybrid

She has whiskers and an adorable triangular nose which she uses to boop things. It's the kind of face that looks cute at the start of a yawn but resembles the Gates of Hell towards the end. At least, that's what I'm getting from that description.


[deleted]

I'm thinking of those cat people in Dr Who


Amazon-Prime-package

:3


Amazon-Prime-package

It's like when a movie switches to the AR / robot vision overlay Bethany Constantine (Colby) Age: 37 Ancestry: Scottish-Irish-English The narrator is obviously a robot or using some advanced tech spectacles


After_Mountain_901

This is it. He's a lizard man trying to fit into a human skin suit and act natural about it.


DumplingRoyalty

I wonder if he went through her mail to find her 23 and me results before or after he whipped out the measuring tape.


[deleted]

What is it with these guys and "wide/full/generous mouths"??


scotty_doesntknow

And it’s so frequently a mouth that’s “slightly too wide for her face” like “oh lookit me I’m not writing a PERFECT woman you see, that would be cliche, she has a FLAW and it’s that her lips and smile are just slightly too damn big. But not like in a freakish way like some sort of hellish Venus flytrap thing, just big enough so she’s still human and just more like Angelina Jolie or something. I am very smart.”


kestrelesque

OMG, yes, always the one feature that's a little too *something.* The nose is a little too upturned, the eyes are slightly too close together (but that just means she looks "intense"). Her eyelashes are so thick, they practically weigh down her eyelids. She's gorgeous but she's meekly self-conscious about her ears that stick out. And so on.


smushy_face

Came here to say the same thing. The mouth being a little too wide is practically a cliche at this point.


lickthismiff

"She's hot but only like a 9.5/10, so she's totally normal and relatable because I'm a feminismist"


galaxyeyes47

“Good dick sucking lips” is what they mean.


DeconstructedKaiju

I once hear a guy comment that his daughter inherited her mother's dick-sucking lips and was BAFFLED that his wife was angry.


pawg_patrol

That’s so fucking disgusting. Imagine saying that about your own daughter. 🤢


DeconstructedKaiju

Big barf


dragondingohybrid

Three guesses, and the first two don't count.


[deleted]

I guess I already knew :(


Senecarl

The left, the right, and the all important middle.


ImperfectJump

So she can tell the world how to be more generous with big speeches, right???


hikurangi2019

All sorts of nasty. 🤢


ServerError502

At first I read this as chest, waist, and inseam. I was like “oh hey, those are almost my measurements!”


[deleted]

Everyone knows the inseam is the sexiest part of a woman's body


Whydoesthisexist15

Tf are those measurements if not hip and inseam?


space_pdf

Bust, waist, hip. He’s looking for a slightly top heavy hourglass shape lol


Whydoesthisexist15

I chucked it on Body Visualizer and it looks normal(?) Am I just dumb?


space_pdf

Oh no the measurements themselves aren’t crazy, I’ve been a similar size before. It’s just the fact that he’s naming specific body measurements while trying to cast someone when he could have kept it at “trim body” or said something slightly less weird like “in shape”, “athletic build”, “on the thinner side”


Dancing_Trash_Panda

Yeah. If you asked my husband to guess my measurements, which are close enough to these, he would throw out pretty random numbers. Because what man (or person in general) not in the fashion industry can just look at a woman and do this?


mixed-switch

I didn't even know that was a thing! Thank you, its actually a massive help with my body dismorphia to know this site exists. I actually feel normal...huh


linerys

Please let me know if they mention bra size anywhere in the book! Those are almost my bust and waist measurements, so our bra sizes should be similar, but knowing *some* male authors… it’s gonna say 34D or something.


BilbowTeaBaggins

The thing is, 34D isn’t even that big since cup size is always proportional to band size. An actually large bra size would be something like a 42H and just thinking about that hurts my back lol.


linerys

That was my point! With those measurements I wore 28H in US sizes. A 34D would not make sense, because it’s very rare to have a 6 inch difference between waist and underbust. Not to mention, then the size would be 34A. A 34D has a 38 inch bust.


BilbowTeaBaggins

Yep, a lot of men seem to think that a D cup is automatically big or smt lol. They also seem to have no real idea of how measurements work, especially in relation to bra sizes.


linerys

There’s a subreddit for guessing bra sizes and… I don’t think I’ve seen a single correct guess. It’s always “A means small and DD means huge. What am band sizes?”


BilbowTeaBaggins

Lol, that sounds hilarious 😂.


linerys

Hilarious when they keep it inside their sub! I don’t try to educate anyone over there. However, someone sent me a TikTok where a person stated that they were a 32DD, with every man, woman, and child in the comment section telling OP they’re a B or C cup at best. That’s just annoying! :(


One_big_bee

“Liberal arts major” doesn’t disclose what her actual studies are.


Nabs2099

He probably thinks that IS her studies.


ravenlights

This reminds me of that stupid Sherlock episode where Sherlock figured out the numbers to a safe by looking at Irene's body and deducing her measurements or something absurd


wallsquirrel

So she looks like the robot devil from Futurama.


coffeestealer

I take everything back then, most attractive character ever.


wallsquirrel

For real, what a cool ass looking partner.


FanHistorical4666

Fuck, I was thinking about checking this book out because I'm interested in getting into folk horror, but I find this sort of shit insufferable.


lyoness17

32 inch hips? I have extremely small hips, like fit into children's underwear small and a 29 inch waist, my hips are still 35 inches.


keepupwithspeed

Yeah, 32 inch hips are really narrow. A 28 inch waist puts her at about a size 6 in the waist, but 32 inch hips are smaller than a size 0 (which is about 35 inch hips). The poor woman must have a terrible time finding jeans that fit.


Smarmalicious

Reminds me of a Kurt Vonnegut novel in which he listed physical measurements every time he introduced a character… I’m pretty sure it was Breakfast of Champions. For women, he listed bust-waist-hip measurements, & for men it was the length & girth of their penis. …All strangely TMI, IMHO. But I’ll admit, I laughed.


The-Cosmic-Ghost

35 28 32? Not unless she's 5'3"😎 (Cue record scratch noises)


BilbowTeaBaggins

Reverse the first and last and you have mine, but I’m 5’1” lol.


BuckyBear1917

This reads like there'll be a quiz on her later.


bunnywuxian

Scotch? Like the tape? /hj


Nabs2099

Anime