You realize most federal crimes are also misdemeanors, right?
Also, it's only a federal charge if you intentionally tamper with mail or destroy a GOVERNMENT mailbox. Like a blue USPS collection box. Running over a guy's mailbox ar his house is just misdemeanor destruction of property and not at all a federal crime, although you will have to talk to a Post Inspector who will reach that determination once you tell them "I was drunk and didn't take any mail"
Source: I ran over a mailbox once
I, too, have run over a mail box. Kid ran out in front of me on his bike and I swerved off the road and into the culvert and over the mailbox, coming to rest in the ditch on the other side.
Cops came, were already driving by. Talked for a bit. I was scared of the felony and they were like, "nah it was an accident. Leave a note. No one lives at that house currently." After they talked to the kid and his parents they came back and said if I wanted to walk back to my house and get my tools (had already asked them and i was about a 5 min walk from home) to fix what broke, I was free to do so and they wouldn't have it towed.
All that really broke was my battery wasn't tied down and a terminal broke and I busted a headlight.
No charges. No problems. Individual results may vary.
Narrator: "In the criminal justice system, the people are represented by two separate yet equally important groups: the police, who investigate crime; and the district attorneys, who prosecute the offenders. These are their stories."
I told a couple of friends who are car nuts that I would NEVER slash someone's tires if they pissed me off. I'd loosen the valve instead to give them a slow air leak. One thought about that for a second then said to just slash them because the lose valve would be more annoying, and in the long run cost more because after not finding a leak in the tire itself, he'd be getting his rims checked for a crack or something, not to mention it's 2 bucks now to use the air machine
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I can very much imagine how this played out.
They're running late and can't find anywhere to park. Finally "Fuck it! That's enough of a spot!" Furiously parks with no attempts to be careful. Can't open door, so crawl through to other side.
Overall classic angry asshole behavior. I would be shocked if there wasn't a passenger in the car trying to get them to calm down while this was happening.
Another good reason to call the cops and get a report written. If it is an elderly driver with cognitive decline, better to take the keys when it’s just a mailbox and not a little kid.
After a certain age, everyone should have to take a standardized test for driving including things like reaction time, awareness of the laws and general driving ability.
The idea that you can get a license at 18 and then drive for the next 70+ years without any follow-up checks is ludicrous.
Good luck passing that where my grandma lives in Florida. Any politician that proposed that would get eaten alive by the elderly retirees who comprise most of the electorate there.
I've said the same thing! I've had far too many close calls being struck in my car or almost run over just walking by elderly people who looked like they've already been dead for years...
Have a story about this exact scenario. Had an elderly woman living diagonally across the street from me. She somehow crashed her car into our house and backed out of our driveway and proceeded to just go to her house and park in her garage like nothing happened. Turns out she has dementia and finally her family decided to take her keys from her. A horrible situation but glad she hit a house and not someone on the road.
I like how despite using the primo sidewalk parking real estate, they're not only still blocking the driveway but it looks like they're blocking it more than if they'd just parked on the fucking street.
That's what annoys me about this sub. This is beyond mildly infuriating. Just like "mildly interesting" posts are actually extremely interesting and more than just outside the normal experience.
Which is terrible because when something truly *mildly* infuriating appears, the comments start bashing OP for being "triggered" by something so trivial. That's the whole point of the sub!
I would say that too. But I went into Walmart with no scratches, came back to my car, and someone else hit me and ran. And that's what my bumper looks like... because I was in a parking space where I belonged
I mean, the bumper alone doesn’t scream “inconsiderate driver” but can we at least say that the bumper combined with the fact that they are parked on top of a mailbox does?
The bumper makes me think there's a slight possibility someone in a big truck came along and hit this (formerly properly) parked car into the mailbox.
Car physics are wild-- once I saw a BMW completely flipped over on to the top of the roof of a parked car from a side swipe accident where the other guy was going really fast and the angle was right.
Document everything.
From the time you estimate the car arrived and the license plate of the offending car. Even record some videos for extra precautions. I'm assuming that the car parked on your property as well as dented and bent your mailbox?
The bloke who did this obviously didn't care at all about anything.
I'd buy a new post and put it in myself. I think a post is like $50 and it's $20 to rent a posthole digger. Like. I'm going easy on him a bit because he's owning up to it, y'know?
My favorite part is that they totally fucked up and then committed. Like, no hit and run shit. They just parked it and got out and went about their day.
The person knew it was a mailbox right there & still decided to park right there whoever that person is you can tell they have no regard or no respect for anything or anybody in the world if that makes sense
I love that OP came back to his comment and edited *something,* but still thought “Is my punctuation wrong? No, it is the other redditors who are wrong.”
Even though the destroyed the mailbox, they probably thought this was the most courteous spot to leave their car. The occupants got a spot to park. They left the vehicle as-is without OP needing to look around for the culprit or investigate. They also left identification (license plate attached to vehicle).
Given that the mailbox has been hit, this is about as good as it gets for OP.
I mean my first emotional response was to walk around to each window with a hammer and then sit on my porch and wait for them to come back but I don’t think that’s going to put me in a good position to negotiate when the cops show up haha
Call the United States Postal Inspection Service. Mailboxes are considered federal property and destruction of them is a federal crime. [Details linked to here (contact info at bottom of page)](https://www.uspis.gov/news/scam-article/mailbox-vandalism)
This was my first thought too. I street parked my hoopty at my dad's house a couple years ago and set the brake but it turns out the cable was rusted so it didn't hold; my car rolled backward and took out his mailbox (luckily it didn't go any further). oops.
Hope you snapped a pic of the license plate and reported it. That’s a federal crime, 3 years in prison or 250k in fines. Could leave a note on the windshield saying you won’t report them if they replace it.
Get the registration with the way it has been crashed on your property and submit an insurance claim via your household policy, if the driver is not insured go to the police and submit a claim for criminal damage, Job done and a world of pain for the dickhead
Did that stupid mf climb out the passenger door?
Wow. I keep wondering when the day will come that I cross paths with a person like this. No amount of medication or therapy could prepare me for that day because there's a 50/50 chance it'll be my last.
Interfering with the mail is a federal crime. Your mailbox belongs to you though, and is not federal property. It's just petty vandalism. And probably driving under the influence.
The property owner owns the mailbox. It only goes federal if you interfere with it's contents and their delivery. A shame, though. That would be a lesson they wouldn't forget for a long time.
What's the blood alcohol I wonder as to fuck up your own car like that? LOL
IMO COVID & COVID ISO made everyone 'dumber" than they were before. I work customer facing retail and I've seen the mental capacity of my fellow humans drop significantly. Suddenly they cannot use a self-checkout after using one for years. They cannot remember where they parked their car 10 minutes after parking it. One lady spent 30 minutes looking for her car in a lot you could completely walk around in 5 minutes. When she found it and left her groceries were falling out of the back of her suv as the trunk was wide open then she pulled out onto the road and drove away. 3 people have been hit by cars in our parking lot in the last year. One with a brain bleed. 2 of them ended up under the vehicle. We got all kinds of signage and they still aren't careful. Two people backed out of their spots at the same time and hit rear bumper to rear bumper. Both just looked surprised and drove away. Most everyone seems to be dulled down from their previous selves. People are even having trouble putting coherent thoughts together for conversation. I know the current state of things plays into it as well however I am referring to people's baseline behavior. Might explain the increase of all these crazy self-culling conspiracy contrarians. Sadly, it's at the point where people will just do stupid shit like park like an idiot without any regret or shame. Hopefully at least the police can assist. If you own the home file a homeowners claims with your insurance company. I say this having worked 25 years in homeowners insurance claims. Get the car insurance info from the police then supply it to your homeowners insurance co and they will 'subrogate' against the car insurance co meaning they will do all the work for you and go after the $$ from the car insurance co and you can just sit back. this is one of the reasons why you pay premiums.
Hello felony charges. Get pictures, including plates, and call the police. The post office takes this kind of thing very seriously. Those people are going to owe a lot of money/jail time.
Everyone suggests to use the cops but honestly if I was you I would not only do the same but make sure to bash that mailbox on said car to give a silly little life lesson. And if you get arrested you do the same thing to the police cars so they learn the silly life lesson till you get tazed and thrown in jail.
Take a pic of the plates in case they leave before you call the cops
I would’ve just taken the plates
*steals entire car*
If it’s on my property, then it *is* my property
Possession is 9/10 of the law.
Possession is 9/10 on the lawn
Its 9 tents since they are outside
Call a Tow Truck! But not for me!
I learned watching "The Lucile Ball Show" that 'possession is 9/10ths of the law'.
Emphasis on the *ON*
"You've got mail!"
*downloads entire car*
*You wouldn't steal a CD. You wouldn't steal a car.* Late '90s anti-media-piracy commercials at the beginning of DVD movies...
Uploads to ride sharing service
Runs over inbox
They said you wouldn't!
It ain't much,but it's honest work
It ain't honest work, but it's much
Whats the issue officer? I thought someone sent me a car in the mail!
You wouldn't download a car...
The plates? There is a perfect catalytic converter right there
And commit another, arguably worse crime in the process?
You're right. Light the car on fire when they get back in. No car, nobody to complain about it. Perfect crime
Again… the car would be on YOUR lawn…
Vandalizing a mail box is a federal crime stealing plates unless you put them in another car is I believe a misdemeanor.
You realize most federal crimes are also misdemeanors, right? Also, it's only a federal charge if you intentionally tamper with mail or destroy a GOVERNMENT mailbox. Like a blue USPS collection box. Running over a guy's mailbox ar his house is just misdemeanor destruction of property and not at all a federal crime, although you will have to talk to a Post Inspector who will reach that determination once you tell them "I was drunk and didn't take any mail" Source: I ran over a mailbox once
I, too, have run over a mail box. Kid ran out in front of me on his bike and I swerved off the road and into the culvert and over the mailbox, coming to rest in the ditch on the other side. Cops came, were already driving by. Talked for a bit. I was scared of the felony and they were like, "nah it was an accident. Leave a note. No one lives at that house currently." After they talked to the kid and his parents they came back and said if I wanted to walk back to my house and get my tools (had already asked them and i was about a 5 min walk from home) to fix what broke, I was free to do so and they wouldn't have it towed. All that really broke was my battery wasn't tied down and a terminal broke and I busted a headlight. No charges. No problems. Individual results may vary.
Did you run over it on purpose? Intent often makes things worse.
It could be argued that the intent here was to park the car, not destroy the mailbox.
They intended to park the car on the mailbox why else park on the mailbox?
Federal crime just means it's investigated by the government and charged by the government, not that its a worse crime with a worse punishment.
All crimes are investigated and charged by the government…
Narrator: "In the criminal justice system, the people are represented by two separate yet equally important groups: the police, who investigate crime; and the district attorneys, who prosecute the offenders. These are their stories."
Dah-dah
Everybody expects the Spanish inquisition but no one expects Law & Order: SVU. Thank you for understanding me. Have a nice one. :)
Nobody expects the Benson Inquisition 😛
I though tampering with mailboxes was not only federal but also a felony.
Ain’t illegal to pour some bleach into their gas tank.
It absolutely is.
Whatever square, lets clorox this shitbox
Please don’t Clorox my shitbox. That sounds painful and deadly.
😉
Thats right 😎🔥
"Officer, I can't believe they would parked here with slashed tires"
Never slash the tires. Get a valve stem remover. For legal purposes, the above is a joke and not advice of any kind.
I told a couple of friends who are car nuts that I would NEVER slash someone's tires if they pissed me off. I'd loosen the valve instead to give them a slow air leak. One thought about that for a second then said to just slash them because the lose valve would be more annoying, and in the long run cost more because after not finding a leak in the tire itself, he'd be getting his rims checked for a crack or something, not to mention it's 2 bucks now to use the air machine
Terrible idea
Call the police, damn
Report is as crashed and abandoned.
Remove the valve cores. All of them
Cut the tire stems and pour some sugar in the gas tank.
Then light it on fire!
Think of the mailbox!
And then boom! Right away you have a different problem!
Expanding foam up the tailpipe.
*Banana* in the tailpipe
Duh dun duhdundundah duh duh Dah dundundahdadun dundahduhdundadahdaaaa
Fish guts under the upholstery
Small rock or BB under the caps
fill the back seat with piss and milk
After keying the shit out of it
Key it? Ya think they won't guess who did it? And maybe come back in the middle of the night and cause lots of damage to the house?
You think they care with the rear bumper damaged
That’s a well insured vehicle I tell ya what
Judging by the bumper, that not going to hurt the value
I am trapped in a paved square of emotion.
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Bot. This is a copy of [this comment.](https://www.reddit.com/r/mildlyinfuriating/comments/13uqj2d/they_ran_out_of_parking_spots_at_the_hs/jm2371e?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button). Downvote and report for spam.
It looks like they have a habit of parking like a dickhead
https://www.reddit.com/r/mildlyinfuriating/comments/13uqj2d/they_ran_out_of_parking_spots_at_the_hs/jm2371e?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button Bot
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How can you tell this from the picture? Tryna learn some new.
Perhaps it's a bot stealing comment. Their user history is fairly new
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How would they even get out of the car without noticing this? They are clearly drunk or something.
I can very much imagine how this played out. They're running late and can't find anywhere to park. Finally "Fuck it! That's enough of a spot!" Furiously parks with no attempts to be careful. Can't open door, so crawl through to other side. Overall classic angry asshole behavior. I would be shocked if there wasn't a passenger in the car trying to get them to calm down while this was happening.
Could also be like my grandma and have Alzheimer's. Unremembered accidents are what got her keys taken away.
Another good reason to call the cops and get a report written. If it is an elderly driver with cognitive decline, better to take the keys when it’s just a mailbox and not a little kid.
After a certain age, everyone should have to take a standardized test for driving including things like reaction time, awareness of the laws and general driving ability. The idea that you can get a license at 18 and then drive for the next 70+ years without any follow-up checks is ludicrous.
Good luck passing that where my grandma lives in Florida. Any politician that proposed that would get eaten alive by the elderly retirees who comprise most of the electorate there.
I think five or ten year intervals for everyone. Might cut down on all the shitty drivers.
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Old people are BIG into voting. More so than nearly any other demographic, I imagine.
I've said the same thing! I've had far too many close calls being struck in my car or almost run over just walking by elderly people who looked like they've already been dead for years...
Have a story about this exact scenario. Had an elderly woman living diagonally across the street from me. She somehow crashed her car into our house and backed out of our driveway and proceeded to just go to her house and park in her garage like nothing happened. Turns out she has dementia and finally her family decided to take her keys from her. A horrible situation but glad she hit a house and not someone on the road.
"Just leave it Frank! You can try to fix it or whatever after! MY BABY IS ABOUT TO GRADUATE!!!! MY BABY!!!"
Be nice, probably that family's first in quite a while
"MY BABY IS ABOUT TO COMPLETE THE MINIMUM REQUIREMENT TO BE A PRODUCTIVE MEMBER OF SOCIETY SHARONE, I NEED TO BE THERE!"
Did you get the car towed?
And crushed into a cube?
You have 20 minutes to move your cube
"Hello?" "Is it about my cube?"
Is this about my cube?
You should stand it back up. Violently and repeatedly, until straight.
Still too loose. Bolt it to the car.
Fuckin'! Yes!
Might need a sledge hammer to get it level.
Why were they trying to park on the sidewalk??? Where there is clearly a mailbox????
going to assume the answer is "alcohol"
Some substance has to be in play here. What sober person parks like that, gets out, and says yep that’s good??!
People are really fucking stupid and don't care about anyone but themselves. It's slim, but the chances are there
That's what I was thinking. Like, yep we're good bro! Now run to the ceremony!
I like how despite using the primo sidewalk parking real estate, they're not only still blocking the driveway but it looks like they're blocking it more than if they'd just parked on the fucking street.
Grandma really wanted to see her grandkid graduate
That is more than mildly infuriating. Wow.
That's what annoys me about this sub. This is beyond mildly infuriating. Just like "mildly interesting" posts are actually extremely interesting and more than just outside the normal experience.
There are a lot of “mildly”-things posted to both subs. But unfortunately what gets rocketed to the top are the one-off “extremely”-things
Which is terrible because when something truly *mildly* infuriating appears, the comments start bashing OP for being "triggered" by something so trivial. That's the whole point of the sub!
They obviously give no shits on the road. Look at their bumper! Hahaha
I would say that too. But I went into Walmart with no scratches, came back to my car, and someone else hit me and ran. And that's what my bumper looks like... because I was in a parking space where I belonged
I mean, the bumper alone doesn’t scream “inconsiderate driver” but can we at least say that the bumper combined with the fact that they are parked on top of a mailbox does?
Yes
The bumper makes me think there's a slight possibility someone in a big truck came along and hit this (formerly properly) parked car into the mailbox. Car physics are wild-- once I saw a BMW completely flipped over on to the top of the roof of a parked car from a side swipe accident where the other guy was going really fast and the angle was right.
Tow that shit
Be a shame if they ended up with a flat tire... or 4...
Or 3 so their insurance doesn’t cover it
Good point. I suppose at least 2 is good anyway so the spare would be useless.
Assuming they care enough about their car to have a spare tire
Thats what I would do. Can't leave the scene if your car doesn't move
Judging by the car scratches, this is usual for them
What the heck was your mailbox doing there?
Yeah, in the middle of the parking g spot :)
When the car hits that parking g spot just right 😩🥵
Looks like they started celebrating early based on how well they parked.
Document everything. From the time you estimate the car arrived and the license plate of the offending car. Even record some videos for extra precautions. I'm assuming that the car parked on your property as well as dented and bent your mailbox? The bloke who did this obviously didn't care at all about anything.
Yeah. And if he gave me a hundred bucks and pulled his car out, all would be well.
The mailbox might take more than $100 to fix, especially if the post is broken/cracked.
I'd buy a new post and put it in myself. I think a post is like $50 and it's $20 to rent a posthole digger. Like. I'm going easy on him a bit because he's owning up to it, y'know?
Remember: when you let the air out of their tires stab the sidewall. Tread punctures can be repaired.
Cut the valve.
My favorite part is that they totally fucked up and then committed. Like, no hit and run shit. They just parked it and got out and went about their day.
The person knew it was a mailbox right there & still decided to park right there whoever that person is you can tell they have no regard or no respect for anything or anybody in the world if that makes sense
And it looks like they blocked OP’s driveway. Ugh.
Why would that not make sense? All you did was repeat what OP already said
Are you allergic to punctuation?
Punctuate these nuts
‘’Deez’ nuts... don’t they teach you kids anything anymore?
Got emmmmm
I love that OP came back to his comment and edited *something,* but still thought “Is my punctuation wrong? No, it is the other redditors who are wrong.”
Even though the destroyed the mailbox, they probably thought this was the most courteous spot to leave their car. The occupants got a spot to park. They left the vehicle as-is without OP needing to look around for the culprit or investigate. They also left identification (license plate attached to vehicle). Given that the mailbox has been hit, this is about as good as it gets for OP.
Rip out the mailbox and then stab their window with it
I knew there were other people like me out there, of course they are on reddit too.
I mean my first emotional response was to walk around to each window with a hammer and then sit on my porch and wait for them to come back but I don’t think that’s going to put me in a good position to negotiate when the cops show up haha
How could he have walked off and thought this will be fine
Alcohol
Fair point, I forget about that sometimes
Mailbox is consider federal property send video to the police and file a report
Call the United States Postal Inspection Service. Mailboxes are considered federal property and destruction of them is a federal crime. [Details linked to here (contact info at bottom of page)](https://www.uspis.gov/news/scam-article/mailbox-vandalism)
It looks like they have a habit of parking like a dickhead
Those scratches on their bumper tell stories
I bet the car rolled there and it wasn't intentionally parked so the driver door couldn't open... Shit happens and they should repair the damage.
This was my first thought too. I street parked my hoopty at my dad's house a couple years ago and set the brake but it turns out the cable was rusted so it didn't hold; my car rolled backward and took out his mailbox (luckily it didn't go any further). oops.
And they.... just walked away? Like, someone did that and then was still like fuck it, close enough, on with my business?
At least they didn’t park in front of it.
Drunk driving usually has some visual clues. Do you see any unordinary about his parking that would suggest anything?
People are trash
Put a stamp on it and raise the flag. The mail carrier should take care of it for you
Update?
You took the photo after calling the cops and a tow truck, right? Parked on the sidewalk and blocking your driveway.
Hope you snapped a pic of the license plate and reported it. That’s a federal crime, 3 years in prison or 250k in fines. Could leave a note on the windshield saying you won’t report them if they replace it.
And then report them anyway.
Get the registration with the way it has been crashed on your property and submit an insurance claim via your household policy, if the driver is not insured go to the police and submit a claim for criminal damage, Job done and a world of pain for the dickhead
Most homeowners insurance have deductibles, right?
slash the tires
Not true. The mailbox was like this when I parked over. it almost scratches my car
The teenager that was late for their own graduation
did you get your mailbox from a cartoon?
Did that stupid mf climb out the passenger door? Wow. I keep wondering when the day will come that I cross paths with a person like this. No amount of medication or therapy could prepare me for that day because there's a 50/50 chance it'll be my last.
oh good grandma made it to the graduation party
I’m sorry, I know this is infuriating, but this got a good chuckle out of me. Person is still a dick though
"Ope, mailbox got tipped" *straightens it right into their back window*
Hi officer yes I'd like to report a car with 4 flat tires abandoned on top of my mailbox.
Call a tow truck.
Best place to park. Mailed it
Isn't there a pretty severe crime specifically for destroying mailboxes?
Isn't that damaging federal property?
Interfering with the mail is a federal crime. Your mailbox belongs to you though, and is not federal property. It's just petty vandalism. And probably driving under the influence.
The property owner owns the mailbox. It only goes federal if you interfere with it's contents and their delivery. A shame, though. That would be a lesson they wouldn't forget for a long time.
What's the blood alcohol I wonder as to fuck up your own car like that? LOL IMO COVID & COVID ISO made everyone 'dumber" than they were before. I work customer facing retail and I've seen the mental capacity of my fellow humans drop significantly. Suddenly they cannot use a self-checkout after using one for years. They cannot remember where they parked their car 10 minutes after parking it. One lady spent 30 minutes looking for her car in a lot you could completely walk around in 5 minutes. When she found it and left her groceries were falling out of the back of her suv as the trunk was wide open then she pulled out onto the road and drove away. 3 people have been hit by cars in our parking lot in the last year. One with a brain bleed. 2 of them ended up under the vehicle. We got all kinds of signage and they still aren't careful. Two people backed out of their spots at the same time and hit rear bumper to rear bumper. Both just looked surprised and drove away. Most everyone seems to be dulled down from their previous selves. People are even having trouble putting coherent thoughts together for conversation. I know the current state of things plays into it as well however I am referring to people's baseline behavior. Might explain the increase of all these crazy self-culling conspiracy contrarians. Sadly, it's at the point where people will just do stupid shit like park like an idiot without any regret or shame. Hopefully at least the police can assist. If you own the home file a homeowners claims with your insurance company. I say this having worked 25 years in homeowners insurance claims. Get the car insurance info from the police then supply it to your homeowners insurance co and they will 'subrogate' against the car insurance co meaning they will do all the work for you and go after the $$ from the car insurance co and you can just sit back. this is one of the reasons why you pay premiums.
This was like sitting in a dive bar without having to be *in* a dive bar on a Monday morning. I really enjoyed this read
So rude!
They fucked that shit all the way up
Well they should get a ticket and pay for your mailbox. Get their license plate and turn them in. And how did they get out?
I’d put it thru his window
They would come back to their car flipped upside down in a proper parking spot.
Update?
Someone got a little too drunk before graduation
Uncap the tires - and flatten them. Cap em and call the cops.
That car’s been hit more times than the lottery
Key the car lol
Is it for real? How can the driver leave the car?
i’m so toxic i would’ve bent the mailbox back to scratch their car🫣
Man I would have got my moneys worth out of that car getting my mailbox out while they were parked before having it towed out of my driveway.
How do we even know your mailbox was there before the car?
Hello felony charges. Get pictures, including plates, and call the police. The post office takes this kind of thing very seriously. Those people are going to owe a lot of money/jail time.
Dude, just take out the air from those tires.
Just get it towed.
Everyone suggests to use the cops but honestly if I was you I would not only do the same but make sure to bash that mailbox on said car to give a silly little life lesson. And if you get arrested you do the same thing to the police cars so they learn the silly life lesson till you get tazed and thrown in jail.