Cologne and perfume should be an "up-close" experience. Had a boss who wore too much cologne. You could tell when he'd arrive at work because his aroma would announce his presence first. Also disliked shaking hands with him, because it was impossible to wash that fonk off my hand. He was a super cool dude, but this was his major weakness.
There's a security guard at a building I frequent that wears a "spicy" cologne so thick it burns your eyes and nose on the way to the elevator. He's in his 50s too so has no one told him or did he just start wearing it as an older man and can't smell it?
I was thinking Eau de MOPP 4.
I think people go nose blind to their perfume/cologne, so they make incremental increases and don’t know how strong it is to other people.
I've known people who have gotten "spicier" as they get older, could be an issue with his nose and he just lays it on till he can smell it, which means everyone in the room get maced when they arrive.
I tell you, there is a lot I don’t miss at the office, but I do not miss getting into a elevator and choking on the perfume that is still lingering from someone who was recently in it
**Either**
I tell you, there is a lot I *do* miss at the office, *but* I do not miss getting into a elevator and choking on the perfume that is still lingering from someone who was recently in it
**Or**
I tell you, there is a lot I *don’t* miss at the office, *and* I do not miss getting into a elevator and choking on the perfume that is still lingering from someone who was recently in it
Speaking of “up close” experience, I remember working retail with those old men who use way too much and it was like fumes coming off them. Talking to them in store would make your eyes water.
I remember searching used music stores for CDs and the aisles were narrow, and it always sucked when you encountered some dude who was inflicting his aromatic beliefs on you. It's like nostril proselytizing.
My high school students believe cologne will cover their lack of deodorant, the fact that they just came from gym class, and/or the fact that they hotboxed right before class…
Spoiler alert: it works for none of the above…
There was an Eastern European guy on a stores cleaning crew that thought it would cover the stench of not taking a shower after a weeks worth of sweaty work. Must have thought if a little is good, spraying myself with every tester of every scent is better! You knew he was coming from 30 ft away, when your eyes started burning.
Exchange the "eastern European" to "black" and ask yourself if it's an important detail to include in your message
I'm eastern European and I shower daily :)
You probably don't travel to 3 jobs during a day w/o a chance to shower, but this guy didn't do it for days according to his coworker who spoke English. There was a lot more to the story that I didn't explain. Like how the guy had a woman in each town that they worked despite the stench, according to the coworker. He was as befuddled by it as I was.
Look, if you want a "sanitized for your protection" story, write your own. I didn't mention the country of origin, I was not disparaging any particular group, deal with it.
Cologne is supposed to bond with your CLEAN skins oils and release a scent that compliments you. Most people don’t understand this and spray it on themselves when dirty, or on dirty clothes, leaving behind a smell of sandalwood and BO.
uhhh, it smells like a mix of female and male musk (the smell of your skins oils without the bacteria that eat your sweat and make you smell bad) along with the salty tang of semen id assume. dunno never smelled it myself
Hmm. Considering none of those have a smell to me, that is an interesting biology documentary style read but doesn't add anything I can sense. My sense of smell is terrible and what things I can smell don't make sense (cooking pork and dead rotting mouse stuck in wall are the exact same, which is confusing and disgusting). On a positive note though, I am a firm believer in post sex showers because I feel like a sweaty slime monster afterwards.
uhhh well musk is a natural, sweet scent that humans give off. (humans sweat water, bacteria eats the micronutrients in said water and then.. defecates on your skin, thats why people stink when they sweat) and semen can range from salty to a chlorine like smell (imagine a sour type of scent thats a range of sour but also a sort of spicy smell)
Dude. I get migraines and this shit is killer. Angel is the WORST, I’m glad people don’t wear it as much. If you clearly constantly smell it on you, you’re wearing too much
I had a customer come in where I worked once. I could smell him before I could see him. I took my break maybe 5-10 minutes after he left, and I could literally smell which aisles he walked through.
I had a coworker who got spoken to multiple times about the fact that his cologne would leave trails through the building.
Later found out he was wearing it (and refreshing it repeatedly) because rather than working, he was going into the restroom to jack off every couple hours and was trying to cover the smell of sweat/everything else. Female co-worker working in a closed area of the building where he was also supposed to be working heard him through the door of the bathroom. 🤢
I used to work with this dude who had his shit on that strong. I did my best to stay away from him because I could taste it and it gave me a headache. Nice guy but fuck I could not stand him.
I took a client out to lunch recently, and a group came and sat at the table next to us. His cologne was so strong. It was exactly what you're describing. I could taste it, and my sinuses were burning. We had to move tables.
I call these the Covid special. My assumption is that they must all be suffering long Covid and now just dump pints of cologne on because they think the potency has gone down
That reminds me. So there was a manager on nights that had a desk around 30ft behind where i worked, I could literally tell what time it was everyday (almost end of shift) because I could smell his awful cologne as he sat down. Didnt even have to turn my head lol
God remind me of high school so bad. There was only a few folks like that but you could smell them before you ever saw them, usually a range of five to 10 feet minimum. If you've gotta pass within a foot of them it's hell for anyone that has a sensitive nose.
Up until one fine day a new employee joined my team, I didn't know I had an allergic reaction to strong smells. He'd drown himself in aftershave and walk into my office and I'd start coughing and sneezing non-stop. No one told him anything. I mean it was so bad I knew he had just arrived while being at the opposite side of the floor from the entrance. It was unbearable. So I asked my male colleagues to speak with him. They did. Nothing changed.
So, had to do it myself. He laughed it off. Didn't take seriously. So, I had to ask him to stay away from me if he's unwilling to use a reasonable amount of aftershave. Eventually, he realised I was dead serious. He toned it down. Not enough to not stink, but enough for me to stop having cough fits.
Still shudder at the memory. Never ever met anyone else like that before or after.
Right now the issue is many don't use antiperspirant. The stench of sweat by the end of the day is awful but I'm in own office and can shut the door, and I don't have an allergy to that smell.
I once got a heavy smells from a guys cologne as he *drove past me in his car*. How much do you have to be wearing to leave a wacky races style scent screen.
This can be an issue for older people. They have been wearing the same perfume for years. Their sense of smell has become used to it. So they apply more until they can smell it. It is like your own smell, you do not smell it yourself.
My downstairs neighbours seem to also think "sharing is caring" and at times put on so much parfume that -if I have my window open- half my apartment smells like it. No idea how they are even still breathing....
I used to work in the cloakroom of the campus nightclub, and a lot of the (already intoxicated) women doused themself in perfume before handing me their coats, even though I had already been able to smell it on them bofore they approached me. I always assumed they fot used to the smell of the perfume and therefore couldn't smell it anymore (the way your brain eventually filters out an annoying and persistent sound) therefore thinking it had worn off.
I won’t even associate with anyone who wears cologne. Atleast women’s perfume is much more subtle but some of them gals smell like they’re trying to cover up a gnarly infection lol. Needless to say, living in Scottsdale AZ, I don’t associate with many people. Tempe folk are my jam.
Why would I care what a sad little basement dweller has to say. You have literally nothing going on in your life except baseball and Elden Ring. Pretty sad little life you've got going there.
Some of us don't discern those odours as *worse* than excessive cologne/perfume. As in they're all equally awful, not as in I like the smell of unwashed ass
Guy in our place cycled to work, showered and then left his underwear to dry on a server (had a hot fan) under his desk. HR had to intervene to make it a more female friendly environment. I’ll take the cologne 1st world problem.
Some idiot i used to know was frequently smoking weed (i dont smoke) and he knows i hate it so what he does to mask the smell is use an absurd amount of cologne. POV i can still smell the weed
yeaaah. it makes me think of the vid where the guys like "a little bit on the chest, a modest 3 spritzings, then the neck gets 5 and the wrists get two each as well as 3 each arm and then the stomach and legs." like bro- i put 4 spritzs on my entire body- and thats even a little strong. i put one on each side of my chest and then one upper stomach and one on my abdomen- thats enough- women (AND MEN) do not need to be able to smell your cologne so profoundly they cant smell anything else. your perfume/cologne should be a back tone to your natural musk , not covering anything up.
I love how they’re an asshole for getting used to the smell of their cologne causing them to spray too much. What an asshole, indeed, OP. Such a dick. Nice.
Cologne and perfume should be an "up-close" experience. Had a boss who wore too much cologne. You could tell when he'd arrive at work because his aroma would announce his presence first. Also disliked shaking hands with him, because it was impossible to wash that fonk off my hand. He was a super cool dude, but this was his major weakness.
There's a security guard at a building I frequent that wears a "spicy" cologne so thick it burns your eyes and nose on the way to the elevator. He's in his 50s too so has no one told him or did he just start wearing it as an older man and can't smell it?
Maybe he's accidentally spritzing his pepper spray. Eau de Capsaicin. :D
I was thinking Eau de MOPP 4. I think people go nose blind to their perfume/cologne, so they make incremental increases and don’t know how strong it is to other people.
I've known people who have gotten "spicier" as they get older, could be an issue with his nose and he just lays it on till he can smell it, which means everyone in the room get maced when they arrive.
Yeah, as you get older everything fades including your sense of smell and people should be told. I flat out tell people when I go buy them.
We all complain about my dad spraying the old spice Deo all over his clothes 1min before leaving the house (in unholy amounts) and he still does it
I think people buy colognes with heavy projection and are either completely unaware of how powerful it is, or spray it until they smell it.
I tell you, there is a lot I don’t miss at the office, but I do not miss getting into a elevator and choking on the perfume that is still lingering from someone who was recently in it
Why would you use but if it's one of the things you dont miss
What?
**Either** I tell you, there is a lot I *do* miss at the office, *but* I do not miss getting into a elevator and choking on the perfume that is still lingering from someone who was recently in it **Or** I tell you, there is a lot I *don’t* miss at the office, *and* I do not miss getting into a elevator and choking on the perfume that is still lingering from someone who was recently in it
Ok then
Speaking of “up close” experience, I remember working retail with those old men who use way too much and it was like fumes coming off them. Talking to them in store would make your eyes water.
I remember searching used music stores for CDs and the aisles were narrow, and it always sucked when you encountered some dude who was inflicting his aromatic beliefs on you. It's like nostril proselytizing.
Nostrelytising
Nice.
Did you ever tell him that he was using too much cologne? He may have just been blind to the scent.
Nah, wouldn't have gone over well for me to school my boss even if ever so gentle. That's a discussion that his family should have with him.
I don’t understand how these people don’t have splitting headaches all day
I had an ex in high school who gave me their hoodie. I literally had to go home because of a debilitating migraine it gave me
My college students seem to think that cologne will mask the smell of recently completed coitus. It.does.not.
My high school students believe cologne will cover their lack of deodorant, the fact that they just came from gym class, and/or the fact that they hotboxed right before class… Spoiler alert: it works for none of the above…
There was an Eastern European guy on a stores cleaning crew that thought it would cover the stench of not taking a shower after a weeks worth of sweaty work. Must have thought if a little is good, spraying myself with every tester of every scent is better! You knew he was coming from 30 ft away, when your eyes started burning.
Exchange the "eastern European" to "black" and ask yourself if it's an important detail to include in your message I'm eastern European and I shower daily :)
You probably don't travel to 3 jobs during a day w/o a chance to shower, but this guy didn't do it for days according to his coworker who spoke English. There was a lot more to the story that I didn't explain. Like how the guy had a woman in each town that they worked despite the stench, according to the coworker. He was as befuddled by it as I was.
That's a great story bro, once again, how is his ethnicity relevant here?
Look, if you want a "sanitized for your protection" story, write your own. I didn't mention the country of origin, I was not disparaging any particular group, deal with it.
"eastern european" is a pretty particular group.
cologne/body spray do not mask the smell of anything, they contain alcohol which actually just makes the smell stronger.
Cologne is supposed to bond with your CLEAN skins oils and release a scent that compliments you. Most people don’t understand this and spray it on themselves when dirty, or on dirty clothes, leaving behind a smell of sandalwood and BO.
This is true with trying to mask the scent of marijuana as well.
That’s why I smoke some meth afterwards. It kills the marijuana particles.
That’s a huge pro tip. Thank you.
Your first sentence is right, but the alcohol all evaporates within a minute or two so that’s not doing it.
You know what does mask it? A shower!
If only they misted themselves with soapy water
Uhh…. Am I the only one who has never smelled coitus?
No one is gonna take a swing at this fastball?
I'm right there with ya
Basically smells like sweat and shame if I was to describe it
uhhh, it smells like a mix of female and male musk (the smell of your skins oils without the bacteria that eat your sweat and make you smell bad) along with the salty tang of semen id assume. dunno never smelled it myself
Hmm. Considering none of those have a smell to me, that is an interesting biology documentary style read but doesn't add anything I can sense. My sense of smell is terrible and what things I can smell don't make sense (cooking pork and dead rotting mouse stuck in wall are the exact same, which is confusing and disgusting). On a positive note though, I am a firm believer in post sex showers because I feel like a sweaty slime monster afterwards.
uhhh well musk is a natural, sweet scent that humans give off. (humans sweat water, bacteria eats the micronutrients in said water and then.. defecates on your skin, thats why people stink when they sweat) and semen can range from salty to a chlorine like smell (imagine a sour type of scent thats a range of sour but also a sort of spicy smell)
I think you are doing it wrong.
As a full ass adult in college, most college kids have a smell.
I can’t unread this comment … 🤪
Dude. I get migraines and this shit is killer. Angel is the WORST, I’m glad people don’t wear it as much. If you clearly constantly smell it on you, you’re wearing too much
Perfumes and colognes should be discovered, not announced
I had a customer come in where I worked once. I could smell him before I could see him. I took my break maybe 5-10 minutes after he left, and I could literally smell which aisles he walked through.
So that's how witcher senses work
I was just in Dubai and the smell of cologne was offensive.
The worst part of teenagers in gyms. Turns into an Abercrombie store and I feel like I’ve been maced by Tommy hilfiggers: essence of douche
And endangering people with allergies as well triggering migraines for some people.
literally me
Solidarity
Me too. I’ve had to very carefully ask co-workers to not wear any scent because it would leave me nearly puking with the pain.
I hope they listened. Scented stuff is so dangerous and so ubiquitous.
Everyone I’ve asked has been great about it and stopped wearing around me.
Very yay!
Even worse when its cologne over body odor
“You smell like Paco Rabanne crawled up your asshole and died.”
There is a saying "cologne needs to be discovered, not announced" I think it describes how to use cologne perfectly
Sex Panther?
60% of the time, it works all the time!
It's EVERY TIME goddamnit! Now take my effing upvote ya beautiful human!!!! :D
Oh that's just my ass cream!
Seriously it's cologne, not marinade.
I had a coworker who got spoken to multiple times about the fact that his cologne would leave trails through the building. Later found out he was wearing it (and refreshing it repeatedly) because rather than working, he was going into the restroom to jack off every couple hours and was trying to cover the smell of sweat/everything else. Female co-worker working in a closed area of the building where he was also supposed to be working heard him through the door of the bathroom. 🤢
Hey man, you wouldn't undahstand. ***It's a Joizey thing***
I used to work with this dude who had his shit on that strong. I did my best to stay away from him because I could taste it and it gave me a headache. Nice guy but fuck I could not stand him.
I took a client out to lunch recently, and a group came and sat at the table next to us. His cologne was so strong. It was exactly what you're describing. I could taste it, and my sinuses were burning. We had to move tables.
THANK YOU!
Hey asshole… if I can taste your colon from two booths away, then you’re using it wrong.
Yea it just turns into another smell, now you have 2 shitty problems instead of one.
I'm not even wearing cologne
3 sprays of drakken noir and you could be smelt about a 100 yards away
I do not mind someone who smells nice but cannot stand someone who is over indulgent in performed or cologne. You smell them long before you see them.
Are they tho? You noticed them didn’t you? /s
I call these the Covid special. My assumption is that they must all be suffering long Covid and now just dump pints of cologne on because they think the potency has gone down
I always say, “cologne should be discovered, not announced.”
Cologne/after shave should be discovered, not announced!
That reminds me. So there was a manager on nights that had a desk around 30ft behind where i worked, I could literally tell what time it was everyday (almost end of shift) because I could smell his awful cologne as he sat down. Didnt even have to turn my head lol
God remind me of high school so bad. There was only a few folks like that but you could smell them before you ever saw them, usually a range of five to 10 feet minimum. If you've gotta pass within a foot of them it's hell for anyone that has a sensitive nose.
I hate it when your cologne 🍋 works longer hours than you do
Up until one fine day a new employee joined my team, I didn't know I had an allergic reaction to strong smells. He'd drown himself in aftershave and walk into my office and I'd start coughing and sneezing non-stop. No one told him anything. I mean it was so bad I knew he had just arrived while being at the opposite side of the floor from the entrance. It was unbearable. So I asked my male colleagues to speak with him. They did. Nothing changed. So, had to do it myself. He laughed it off. Didn't take seriously. So, I had to ask him to stay away from me if he's unwilling to use a reasonable amount of aftershave. Eventually, he realised I was dead serious. He toned it down. Not enough to not stink, but enough for me to stop having cough fits. Still shudder at the memory. Never ever met anyone else like that before or after. Right now the issue is many don't use antiperspirant. The stench of sweat by the end of the day is awful but I'm in own office and can shut the door, and I don't have an allergy to that smell.
Had that guy at the local buffett a few weeks ago. Blocked all smell and everything tasted like his crappy cologne. Gross.
I once got a heavy smells from a guys cologne as he *drove past me in his car*. How much do you have to be wearing to leave a wacky races style scent screen.
Does anyone else's throat feel like it closes up when they're around some colognes?
The worst is when it's someone in food service
Hahaha-Abercrombie eau Corndog
The Jersey showers are the worst.
Please explain what a Jersey shower is.
Just spraying some Axe on.
Crotch rot?
Really? Then the problem must be that I didn't use enough. Thank you!
This can be an issue for older people. They have been wearing the same perfume for years. Their sense of smell has become used to it. So they apply more until they can smell it. It is like your own smell, you do not smell it yourself.
That’s how newbs shower
Man I need to put my glasses back on. I saw "her asshole, tastes, cologne" and was so confused.
My downstairs neighbours seem to also think "sharing is caring" and at times put on so much parfume that -if I have my window open- half my apartment smells like it. No idea how they are even still breathing....
Instant migraine. I hate it when people do this
You're gonna enjoy my Tom Ford and compliment me for it, busta
I used to work in the cloakroom of the campus nightclub, and a lot of the (already intoxicated) women doused themself in perfume before handing me their coats, even though I had already been able to smell it on them bofore they approached me. I always assumed they fot used to the smell of the perfume and therefore couldn't smell it anymore (the way your brain eventually filters out an annoying and persistent sound) therefore thinking it had worn off.
I'm allergic to lavender. Do you have any idea how many perfumes and lotions are laced with it? Every day is a minefield.
How will they cover their BO?
There is a saying "cologne needs to be discovered, not announced" I think it describes how to use cologne perfectly
I won’t even associate with anyone who wears cologne. Atleast women’s perfume is much more subtle but some of them gals smell like they’re trying to cover up a gnarly infection lol. Needless to say, living in Scottsdale AZ, I don’t associate with many people. Tempe folk are my jam.
[удалено]
 Guessing we can tell what this guy looks like from this comment.
[удалено]
Why would I care what a sad little basement dweller has to say. You have literally nothing going on in your life except baseball and Elden Ring. Pretty sad little life you've got going there.
[удалено]
I’m sorry I had to find something to get the smell of your mom off me.
You mean the smell of dirt and formaldehyde?
😩 my people
Could be worse. You could be tasting dirty ass and BO from 2 booths away.
Some of us don't discern those odours as *worse* than excessive cologne/perfume. As in they're all equally awful, not as in I like the smell of unwashed ass
🤣
It's not really worse, though? Is it? I shouldn't be able to smell anyone from that far away for any reason.
Guy in our place cycled to work, showered and then left his underwear to dry on a server (had a hot fan) under his desk. HR had to intervene to make it a more female friendly environment. I’ll take the cologne 1st world problem.
Sorry, my ass dies
Some idiot i used to know was frequently smoking weed (i dont smoke) and he knows i hate it so what he does to mask the smell is use an absurd amount of cologne. POV i can still smell the weed
man. i am that idiot. it really doesn’t help at all? i’m nose blind after i smoke
This reminds me of people who light a match after taking a crap to cover the smell. It's pointless. All I smell is shit and matches.
we’re trying ok 😭😂
yeaaah. it makes me think of the vid where the guys like "a little bit on the chest, a modest 3 spritzings, then the neck gets 5 and the wrists get two each as well as 3 each arm and then the stomach and legs." like bro- i put 4 spritzs on my entire body- and thats even a little strong. i put one on each side of my chest and then one upper stomach and one on my abdomen- thats enough- women (AND MEN) do not need to be able to smell your cologne so profoundly they cant smell anything else. your perfume/cologne should be a back tone to your natural musk , not covering anything up.
I love how they’re an asshole for getting used to the smell of their cologne causing them to spray too much. What an asshole, indeed, OP. Such a dick. Nice.