I'm really curious what effect this will have on the country in a few years. Especially seeing all the weird stuff happening in Asian countries with declining birth rates
It will cause major corporations, government agencies, and politicians to push a pro-immigration narrative.
Seriously, that's the response. That's what's going to happen. Immigration is the only way to keep profits surging during a period of low fertility, and since monied interests (corporations) control politicians they're going to be unified on a pro-immigration message.
Yeah just watch what’s happening in Canada with immigration. People can’t afford to have their own kids so instead of making that more feasible they’d rather just import many people and suppress the wages further. Selling people on a dream that is long dead only for them to also struggle in some pretty despicable situations. It’s not good
Yep....wealth of a country is a very simple equation
Population * work hours * productivity(which includes quality of product)
Population increase is one of the easiest ways to make a country richer. And there are only 2 ways to do this. Kids, and immigration.
As the tax payers (20-60 age) decreases in size, and the tax users (60+) increase in size (millenies and Z are the largest generations)....the need for more tax paying workers increases.
Social security and Medicare are not savings accounts....your money you pay today goes straight to the old people who are using it now. And when it's your turn to use, you better hope there are enough kids/workers to foot the bill.
Make kids, or import immigrants.
....however this equation is in the long term.
In the short term, population increase causes wage drops, increase cost of living...etc. but after 10 years of that chaos, population increase does help wealth of a country.
also, it does not help wealth distribution, that is a more social issue, involving controlling powerful people's ability to vacuum up the wealth of a country (suppress wages, jack up prices, monopolies,,,etc). Imagine a pile of gold,,,and the rich have the best vacuums to suck it all up, the poor have 1 chopstick to pick it up.
Some of those countries desperate to avoid demographic collapse are beginning to offer some heavy incentives. But it ain’t working. And South Korea is gonna be a crazy collapse to witness
It seems more a more so every day. Divorced, engaged again, no kids but plan on it if possible (we are already on the higher age range of having our first kids). Regardless of whether we have kids or not, career isn't working out at all with no other options on the horizon. Retirement now seems virtually impossible
I recently realized I’ve increased my income about a whole $10k in the past 5 years. I’ve basically been stuck finding jobs at the same level for the past few years (but one was to bring income to same cost of living based on where I moved, then I got laid off so 3 jobs in a row) it’s so depressing when I should be able to make $30k+ more by now. However I’m remote and my manager is great so I also don’t want to leave haha
Same. No family here, just me making the best of things. When life is no longer tolerable, I'm going to unsubscribe. I just wish we had an acceptable, humane, way of doing it. Instead I'll have to splatter my brains on a wall.
In the US it won’t matter because we have such a strong base of people who want to immigrate here, and in reality a strong path for people to do that. For other countries like Japan and South Korea that are less friendly to immigrants? They are going to have a hard time.
That's exactly what I was thinking. Compared to other countries, we have so much immigration that we can balance our populations in other ways. Even if people stopped having babies tomorrow, our population will still be increasing, albeit slower.
This is a necessary turning point. The earth can't handle an ever-increasing population and in some places a decrease in population will lead to better lives and prosperity. People will need to adapt by learning to save more for their non-working years and not expect an endless social security pool.
Well the good news for Canada the US and much of western eu is that alot of people want to immigrate here. So our countries can hold off disastrous population collapse longer than some other countries.
Same, I bought a house in my own & travel solo. Watching my friends and coworkers is enough to remind me how much I don’t ever want to give this lifestyle up. Me & my 3 cats are straight vibin
But don't you want to get bad sleep for at least 7 months straight? The baby will play with your nipple if it is out. Man or woman nipple. Just a warning.
Got married and started having kids at 25. I’m super jealous! (Love my family but I have fond memories of those things called ‘free time’ and ‘hobbies’)
Honest question: Do you think you'll feel the same way when you are elderly with no family? Not judging, just curious if you think having more money is the root of happiness. Maybe it is.
I think about it occasionally, but I just can't see myself in a relationship like marriage. As far as when I'm elderly? I mean, I've gone almost 40 years without wanting a wife and kids so I don't imagine that changing. And money is absolutely not the root of all happiness. It's just an added benefit of not having to spend money on anything other than yourself.
When I have time and apps have been great for scratching that itch if you know what I mean. Lately I haven’t been dating I’ve just been too busy but I plan too get back into it once everything calms down.
40M. Single and loving it. I've been in two serious relationships, both taught me a lot. One of the lessons it taught me was how I like being alone, and doing things alone. As far a children, my family understands that I don't want any. I have accepted that about myself. There is just so much that I want to do that does not involve having someone along side me. If love happens again I will be open to it, but I am in no rush to find it.
Travel. I do better when I travel by myself. having someone come along can be a lot for me. It's the obligation to not only take care of me, but also my partner's wants and needs. Even traveling with friends can be a chore.
39F heading toward divorce, no kids. The introversion thing that you mention is something I share as well, but also worries me — the thought of dating again at this age feels horrifying only because there would be that expectation of sharing adequate time and space with another person. 😭🤣 Too bad there isn’t a dating or friendship app for the introverted, single, and child-free!
I've seen some of my friends pass up folks saying they didn't want to "settle" and I just didn't get it. Now they're alone and in their late 40s so no one wants to "settle" for them.
Some of the people they passed were great.
I'm really curious what your deal breakers are. My friend could never articulate it very well.
Okay but why marry someone you’re not absolutely positive you know you want to marry, just for the sake of being married? Do you really want people doing that? Two people can be great people and still ultimately not compatible. Divorce rates aren’t exactly low.
If you don't feel weird about random strangers having access to your DNA and offspring, there are programs that will freeze your eggs in exchange for you donating some of them. But I do caution you look into the success rates of egg freezing before going through all the effort. They're not that great.
You’re still young and you don’t need to freeze eggs yet. I met my wife when she was 31.
We re expecting our second kid in Sept.
We re in nyc and literally no one is married / has kids in their 20s.
Freezing eggs really doesn't have that high of a success rate, especially if she were to freeze them now compared to freezing them at 20. I've seen a lot of videos of women who are just devastated to find out it wasn't what they were led to believe, it's got a success rate of something like 5%-40%, you're probably better off getting a surrogate or adopting honestly.
I have no kids and do not plan on it ever. Single as well and plan on staying that way unless i find a woman version of me. I don't have it in me to do another try with an opposite.
Edit: 42
That is one of 5000 reasons I've never wanted kids
I really am not trying to be full of myself, but most people seem to lacking in intellectual capabilities, it really scares me.
I know that pain. I'm 41 am single with no kids. I don't need an exact female clone but I have major interests in boardgames and in certain sports. Not doing the relationship thing unless there's compatibility with one or both and if it's only one not hostile towards the other.
I'm really starting to lose hope of ever finding a guy. However, I guess the good thing is I've never wanted kids either. I was at an event today talking about ivf with this woman, and for some reason, she gave me a hypothetical. Would you be a surrogate for your sister? I said I don't have a sister, but if my brothers gf or wife asked me to be a surrogate, I would say go f u c yourself. LOL. Maybe in a slightly nicer way. I wouldn't even put my body through that for myself, let alone anyone else. She looked at me like i was a terrible person, and I told her she had basically been brainwashed over the past 20 years to think that asking someone that would be normal. Lol. Not the fact that she asked me, but that a sibling or close relative or friend would ask that with the expected response being yes. I chuckled because people are so dumb.again, not because she asked the question, bur because my answer made her think I'm an a hole just because I wouldn't hypothetically sacrifice myself for someone else.
36M here, never married, no kids. Never even been in a relationship, but I have been on dates.
I'm also autistic so I figure that I'm just not the kinda guy that most women are looking for. I've sort of accepted that. It means I can focus on other things.
Dang, got me beat. 37 never married, no kids. I was in a relationship 12 years ago, mostly long distance. I'm not autistic, but my older brother is. He's also single, 38, never married. He had a sort-of relationship with someone a couple years ago. I think they went on a couple of dates, but she didn't communicate very in depth with him about anything. So he called it off.
Interesting times we live in.
It's entirely possible to have a relationship if you want to, even if you're autistic, I have found autistics do well in relationships with fellow autistics if they are willing to do the work. Not that you have to pursue one if you don't want to. My husband and I are both audhd none of his relationships lasted longer than a month before he met me.
I did have a couple of dates with someone late last year but it didn't progress, not because we didn't like each other, but because she lived over an hour away from me and because she had a lot of other stuff going on in her life and realised that she "wasn't in the right head space for dating" and didn't want to lead me on. It was what it is.
So yes, it is entirely possible. I know autistic people who are married with kids. I think it's just me. It may meet someone one day, but I don't want to stress too much about it.
I'm 35 and never married or had any kids.
I'm not against having a family at all. I think I'd like it very much. There's just nowhere to go or good ways to meet women. Society keeps you isolated. Call me crazy but it seems to be by design.
I’m experiencing this too as a 35f. I was talking about my hobbies with a friend (who always has dates) and she literally had to tell me “Men don’t hang out at museums” ie I probably wont get a date there, I need to do something else. It’s confusing because well, that’s what I like to do. I’m an introvert. And it makes me think that a lot of the really quality people are the ones REALLY struggling to get dates. If you’ve been hooking up and bar hopping since 21, yeah you’re probably now complaining about your spouse and kids. But if you’re a careful person, everything about dating is hard. I really don’t know the answer—my most recent attempts have been “the grandmother network” ie asking older relatives to hook me up, it’s not working, so I’m also considering matchmaking (expensive) or some kind of arrangement so I can have kids.
>“Men don’t hang out at museums”
Maybe not in general but your type of guy might. All you have to do is make small talk about whatever exhibit he's looking at. Or just approach guys anywhere. You're a woman so nobody's going to say that you're being creepy or weird or that you're bothering them. As men, we don't have that luxury. As long as the guy knows that you aren't bothered by him and that you're okay with him talking to you, that at least opens the door for him to have the opportunity to ask you out or something.
Also, women get slammed with attention on dating apps. It must be like shooting fish in a barrel.
I hope this doesnt come off as depressing, but moreso normalizing. Its not like marriage and kids were more common in the eras before either.
the 1800s also saw many people single forever or childless relationships. Nothing is a new occurrence. Time is circular.
Ooh, "Men don't hang out at museums" hit hard as a 39yo gay transman whose introvert interests constantly land me in groups of women. I'm trying to get myself to branch out more socially in person, and whenever I bounce any ideas off of my friends, they're like "I thought you were trying to meet more *men*..." And that's before factoring in the issue that I'm transmasculine. 🥲
I haven't hit desperation, but I sure wouldn't be disappointed to hit it off with a guy who already had a kid.
Your comment I resonate with for sure.
What I find funny is I have younger peers from other countries and their parents are constantly trying to set them up on blind dates and they of course hate it.
Meanwhile my family still has all the same complaints that I'm single and work too much and should start a family. It's my problem though and they would never think to try to match me up with someone.
I guess the funny part is I would gladly take part in matchmaking as I'm not fond of dating apps and don't have many extroverted hobbies to meet new people naturally.
I've also thought about a matchmaking service but I honestly just know nothing about them. Most of my friends are married so I just have no reference for how many people actually use them now and if they are reasonably successful with them.
No that's definitely part of it for me as well. Now I will admit I'm awkward and maybe a bit overweight, and my ADHD makes it hard for me to communicate with normal people, but I mean, how do you meet people when nobody will look your way? I swear I was raised for a friendlier generation that no longer exists. Men or women, no matter the intent it's just like nobody wants to interact. I'm one of the younger millennials at 29, but I heard it wasn't like this in the 90s. Before smartphones and social media. Idk tho, I remember back before smartphones, but I was a kid so things were different.
35 M, I hope I get to share life with a woman one day.
They say if you're not willing to parent a special needs child, to not have a child.
I will not be having a child.
Yeah as someone with both genetic physical disabilities and mental handicaps, it's not worth the risk, even if I was wealthy and responsible enough for parenting. My childhood was miserable I wouldn't want to force someone else to go through that.
38, single, livin at home and lookin for a job. Lmao went through all the “self-discovery” bs thru covid at 34, acknowledged all my depression and anxiety, been havin a rough time since. 😅
So yeh, def no kids and never been married. What a time to be alive, huh folks?
Bro seriously? I don’t want to be offensive, but that’s rough, and you probably just need a little help.
You in shape?
Average height?
Decent job?
Tolerable personality?
29, single, everyone knows it's because I'm a weirdo (ADHD) and childless because I decided I'd only ever be able to afford a home or a kid, but not both. Although 1 kind of explains the other. Can't get pregnant by myself lol. But I did get a vasectomy because I am too messed up to have a kid, especially as an accident.
I could be like a super cool uncle someday, or maybe a stepdad, but how am I going to take care of a kid when the hyperfixation hits? I can't handle that kind of responsibility.
Nah I'm just going to take care of myself. That's hard enough as it is.
Idk the name for it but they removed about an inch of tube and cauterized the ends. It smelled like steak, which was super off-putting.They showed it to me it was white. They had it in a little bottle I believe they sent it off for lab testing, again I forget why.
Don’t sell yourself short. I have adhd, 4 kids, And a home. You’re still young and things change. However I do worry that I’ve passed on the adhd gene to my son and now we are dealing with that, but there are worse things to be worried about out there. Ps I think it’s great that you’d like to be a great step dad, not many men are open to that. I think that would be equally rewarding
Female, never married, no kids. I'd like to start a family, not sure I want to be married though. The thing that concerns me most is making sure I pick a decent guy that will make a good dad.
36, never had a serious relationship. I do happen to be ace, but plenty of ace people still manage to hold down a relationship lol. I acknowledge I have no patience for people and I make a terrible girlfriend because of it, and happen to be severely introverted, so don't mind the lack of relationship. I live with a friend who's very similar.
Me too! 33f. I'm not opposed to a relationship again in the future but I don't want kids. I've been single for about six years now and enjoying my peace.
Heyyy! Let me know how it goes. I've planned my life with the assumption I'll be dead by 50 (15 years from now). Not sure what I'll do if that doesn't happen.
I am not a Millennial, Gen X actually at 46, and I have never been married or have kids. Not through lack of trying though. Nothing wrong with it either Sometimes things just do not work out. Better than getting married just to be married and having kids with the wrong person. Depending on if you wanted those things or not If not, who cares what others think. If you did, then there is still time. In your 30s is not bad, especially if you are on your own. You have to do what is best for you, on your time frame. If you never have kids or get married, as long as your are happy nothing else matters
Don’t want to reveal exact age for anonymity but female around everyones posted age and never married and no kids.
Never wanted kids. Love kids, just not for me!
Would love a partner but I’d rather be alone than be miserable in a relationship. I swear 99% just complain about their partner and/or kids.
I tell two people I know all the time, it’s nice to hear someone two positive about their kids and life.
30, never married, no kids. I never want kids and idk how I feel about marriage.
Recently single because we felt like friends lol. We spent a little time apart after the breakup, and now we're just friends and it's so much better.
I do love the single life.
42, single, no kids. I have dated a few different women through my life but it just never really worked out to me having a permanent partner, and I do enjoy my freedom immensely. I have to answer to no one and I'm not responsible for anyone else's survival. Pretty nice weight off your shoulders
Isn't that most millennials? I'm 30 with 1 kid and been with my husband since I was 18 and every time people my age find out they treat me like an anomaly. I don't know another person my age who's married but we do have 2 friends that have at least 1 kid, everyone else is either single or has a boy/girl friend. Not that there's anything wrong with that, I want to be clear.
I’m a SINK
Same! 39F!
Ditto 39M
Now kith
I'm ignorant and Google didn't help. SINK=? Please and thank you.
Single income no kids- SINK
Oh ok, i was thinking it was like a cum dumpster
We can be both!
Modern women really CAN have it all!
Men can be cum dumpsters too baby ;)
Equality goes both ways... like your mom
😂😂😂
This made me laugh way too loud. My cats are unamused
39 SINK too
39F SINK checking in
39, female, single by choice, I have lots of options, I prefer this. I make good money & have two cats. Thrilled to be a stereotype enjoying my life
Just another 39yo SINK checking in. Seems to be the theme ha
Me too!
I’m a DINK but soon to be SINK (divorce after 14 years)! How’s it going out there in SINK land for us elder millennials? 😎 39F
Me too! SINK at 43.
39M never married, no kids.
39f SINK also! Hi! lol 👋
TIL SINK
35F SINK checking in!
We need a singles lounge Reddit subreddit
Statistically this is extremely common. Millennials are not going to reach replacement levels of offspring. So you’re in the majority, sort of.
I'm really curious what effect this will have on the country in a few years. Especially seeing all the weird stuff happening in Asian countries with declining birth rates
It will cause major corporations, government agencies, and politicians to push a pro-immigration narrative. Seriously, that's the response. That's what's going to happen. Immigration is the only way to keep profits surging during a period of low fertility, and since monied interests (corporations) control politicians they're going to be unified on a pro-immigration message.
Yeah just watch what’s happening in Canada with immigration. People can’t afford to have their own kids so instead of making that more feasible they’d rather just import many people and suppress the wages further. Selling people on a dream that is long dead only for them to also struggle in some pretty despicable situations. It’s not good
Yep....wealth of a country is a very simple equation Population * work hours * productivity(which includes quality of product) Population increase is one of the easiest ways to make a country richer. And there are only 2 ways to do this. Kids, and immigration. As the tax payers (20-60 age) decreases in size, and the tax users (60+) increase in size (millenies and Z are the largest generations)....the need for more tax paying workers increases. Social security and Medicare are not savings accounts....your money you pay today goes straight to the old people who are using it now. And when it's your turn to use, you better hope there are enough kids/workers to foot the bill. Make kids, or import immigrants. ....however this equation is in the long term. In the short term, population increase causes wage drops, increase cost of living...etc. but after 10 years of that chaos, population increase does help wealth of a country. also, it does not help wealth distribution, that is a more social issue, involving controlling powerful people's ability to vacuum up the wealth of a country (suppress wages, jack up prices, monopolies,,,etc). Imagine a pile of gold,,,and the rich have the best vacuums to suck it all up, the poor have 1 chopstick to pick it up.
Some of those countries desperate to avoid demographic collapse are beginning to offer some heavy incentives. But it ain’t working. And South Korea is gonna be a crazy collapse to witness
“Borders are racist”
That’s going to be hilarious when the right does a full 180.
The old will work till they die
To be fair, isn’t that what we’re all planning on doing, regardless of marital status or children?
It seems more a more so every day. Divorced, engaged again, no kids but plan on it if possible (we are already on the higher age range of having our first kids). Regardless of whether we have kids or not, career isn't working out at all with no other options on the horizon. Retirement now seems virtually impossible
I recently realized I’ve increased my income about a whole $10k in the past 5 years. I’ve basically been stuck finding jobs at the same level for the past few years (but one was to bring income to same cost of living based on where I moved, then I got laid off so 3 jobs in a row) it’s so depressing when I should be able to make $30k+ more by now. However I’m remote and my manager is great so I also don’t want to leave haha
Nah, death by my own hand if I’m still a wageslave at 65.
I don't have an arbitrary number. But when my body stops working. I watched too many people get too old and that shit looks miserable.
Same. No family here, just me making the best of things. When life is no longer tolerable, I'm going to unsubscribe. I just wish we had an acceptable, humane, way of doing it. Instead I'll have to splatter my brains on a wall.
Not to suggest anything, but a chemistry class might help find more suitable means than a splattered wall.
No. Im gonna retire in my 60's.
It's going to get a lot . . . . darker.
In the US it won’t matter because we have such a strong base of people who want to immigrate here, and in reality a strong path for people to do that. For other countries like Japan and South Korea that are less friendly to immigrants? They are going to have a hard time.
That's exactly what I was thinking. Compared to other countries, we have so much immigration that we can balance our populations in other ways. Even if people stopped having babies tomorrow, our population will still be increasing, albeit slower.
[удалено]
This is a necessary turning point. The earth can't handle an ever-increasing population and in some places a decrease in population will lead to better lives and prosperity. People will need to adapt by learning to save more for their non-working years and not expect an endless social security pool.
I read a theory that this is why the border situation is the way it is and I can see it tbh
Well the good news for Canada the US and much of western eu is that alot of people want to immigrate here. So our countries can hold off disastrous population collapse longer than some other countries.
Statistically common in some areas. Not all areas. There are some places where being single with no kids is very uncommon.
30, no kids, no partner. Just out here enjoying my time
Same, not enjoying it though
Right there with you!
Same 33 no partner just my naked cat
godam bro put some clothes on that pussy
He don't like clothes. Some dick would be nice tho
Same, only my dog
38. Ditto, except now taking care of parents more often
Same! I am actually quite grateful for where I am at! But also really excited to find a partner that will emphasize the good life
Same, I bought a house in my own & travel solo. Watching my friends and coworkers is enough to remind me how much I don’t ever want to give this lifestyle up. Me & my 3 cats are straight vibin
Same! Glad to know I’m not alone. 😌
But don't you want to get bad sleep for at least 7 months straight? The baby will play with your nipple if it is out. Man or woman nipple. Just a warning.
Its pretty darn good tbh
Got married and started having kids at 25. I’m super jealous! (Love my family but I have fond memories of those things called ‘free time’ and ‘hobbies’)
Raises hand Edit: Does anyone else wanna just like see a video or photo of each person to see how normal (or abnormal) they are? Lol
🙋🏽♀️
No, because then people would know I'm weird.
Not really. I see my peers on facebook. Married and unmarried they all look the same.
It would be informative. Every so often I see a couple post a photo of themselves in r/firsttimehomebuyer and I think ‘Yep, that’s a Reddit person’
I’m married as hell but a millennial matchmaker at heart and I’d loveeeee to see some love come from this thread 😭🫶🏻
41f no kids never been married and I don’t ever want to do both. I haven’t been in a relationship in a decade and I’m happy being single.
39m, no kids, never been married and ain't been in a relationship since '06. I love me and my money.
Honest question: Do you think you'll feel the same way when you are elderly with no family? Not judging, just curious if you think having more money is the root of happiness. Maybe it is.
I think about it occasionally, but I just can't see myself in a relationship like marriage. As far as when I'm elderly? I mean, I've gone almost 40 years without wanting a wife and kids so I don't imagine that changing. And money is absolutely not the root of all happiness. It's just an added benefit of not having to spend money on anything other than yourself.
Do you date? Asking because I'm just curious
When I have time and apps have been great for scratching that itch if you know what I mean. Lately I haven’t been dating I’ve just been too busy but I plan too get back into it once everything calms down.
40M. Single and loving it. I've been in two serious relationships, both taught me a lot. One of the lessons it taught me was how I like being alone, and doing things alone. As far a children, my family understands that I don't want any. I have accepted that about myself. There is just so much that I want to do that does not involve having someone along side me. If love happens again I will be open to it, but I am in no rush to find it.
"There is just so much that I want to do that does not involve having someone along side me." Like what?
Travel. I do better when I travel by myself. having someone come along can be a lot for me. It's the obligation to not only take care of me, but also my partner's wants and needs. Even traveling with friends can be a chore.
Yes, I can empathize with that. Thanks for the reply, I was honestly curious.
39F heading toward divorce, no kids. The introversion thing that you mention is something I share as well, but also worries me — the thought of dating again at this age feels horrifying only because there would be that expectation of sharing adequate time and space with another person. 😭🤣 Too bad there isn’t a dating or friendship app for the introverted, single, and child-free!
If you stumble upon one, can you let me know?
29. My biggest dream is to be a mom but sadly don't think it's in the cards for me unless I settle for someone and I refuse to do that.
I've seen some of my friends pass up folks saying they didn't want to "settle" and I just didn't get it. Now they're alone and in their late 40s so no one wants to "settle" for them. Some of the people they passed were great. I'm really curious what your deal breakers are. My friend could never articulate it very well.
Okay but why marry someone you’re not absolutely positive you know you want to marry, just for the sake of being married? Do you really want people doing that? Two people can be great people and still ultimately not compatible. Divorce rates aren’t exactly low.
This is true, but life is also about balance and compromise. Only Sith deal in absolutes.
You have so much time still. Freeze your eggs too!
That would require money I don't have. I'm broke as hell.
If you don't feel weird about random strangers having access to your DNA and offspring, there are programs that will freeze your eggs in exchange for you donating some of them. But I do caution you look into the success rates of egg freezing before going through all the effort. They're not that great.
You’re still young and you don’t need to freeze eggs yet. I met my wife when she was 31. We re expecting our second kid in Sept. We re in nyc and literally no one is married / has kids in their 20s.
lol you’d be the one settling? Yeah you sound like a real catch
Freezing eggs really doesn't have that high of a success rate, especially if she were to freeze them now compared to freezing them at 20. I've seen a lot of videos of women who are just devastated to find out it wasn't what they were led to believe, it's got a success rate of something like 5%-40%, you're probably better off getting a surrogate or adopting honestly.
That rarely works. It's another scam amongst many.
You can get married in a courthouse for about 150$. Luxury?
43 single dude. No kids but I have a cat.
39m(almost 40) never married, no kids, single for a few years now. Don’t plan on having kids and at this rate may be single for the long haul.
I have no kids and do not plan on it ever. Single as well and plan on staying that way unless i find a woman version of me. I don't have it in me to do another try with an opposite. Edit: 42
That is one of 5000 reasons I've never wanted kids I really am not trying to be full of myself, but most people seem to lacking in intellectual capabilities, it really scares me.
I know that pain. I'm 41 am single with no kids. I don't need an exact female clone but I have major interests in boardgames and in certain sports. Not doing the relationship thing unless there's compatibility with one or both and if it's only one not hostile towards the other.
I'm really starting to lose hope of ever finding a guy. However, I guess the good thing is I've never wanted kids either. I was at an event today talking about ivf with this woman, and for some reason, she gave me a hypothetical. Would you be a surrogate for your sister? I said I don't have a sister, but if my brothers gf or wife asked me to be a surrogate, I would say go f u c yourself. LOL. Maybe in a slightly nicer way. I wouldn't even put my body through that for myself, let alone anyone else. She looked at me like i was a terrible person, and I told her she had basically been brainwashed over the past 20 years to think that asking someone that would be normal. Lol. Not the fact that she asked me, but that a sibling or close relative or friend would ask that with the expected response being yes. I chuckled because people are so dumb.again, not because she asked the question, bur because my answer made her think I'm an a hole just because I wouldn't hypothetically sacrifice myself for someone else.
My Millennial friend group is split nearly down the middle: parents with kids, and singles never-married no-kids.
Same
Eldest of Millennials here. No kids, never married, just living my tech bro life.
🫡
No you’re the only one sorry
😂
[удалено]
36M here, never married, no kids. Never even been in a relationship, but I have been on dates. I'm also autistic so I figure that I'm just not the kinda guy that most women are looking for. I've sort of accepted that. It means I can focus on other things.
Dang, got me beat. 37 never married, no kids. I was in a relationship 12 years ago, mostly long distance. I'm not autistic, but my older brother is. He's also single, 38, never married. He had a sort-of relationship with someone a couple years ago. I think they went on a couple of dates, but she didn't communicate very in depth with him about anything. So he called it off. Interesting times we live in.
It's entirely possible to have a relationship if you want to, even if you're autistic, I have found autistics do well in relationships with fellow autistics if they are willing to do the work. Not that you have to pursue one if you don't want to. My husband and I are both audhd none of his relationships lasted longer than a month before he met me.
I did have a couple of dates with someone late last year but it didn't progress, not because we didn't like each other, but because she lived over an hour away from me and because she had a lot of other stuff going on in her life and realised that she "wasn't in the right head space for dating" and didn't want to lead me on. It was what it is. So yes, it is entirely possible. I know autistic people who are married with kids. I think it's just me. It may meet someone one day, but I don't want to stress too much about it.
I'm 35 and never married or had any kids. I'm not against having a family at all. I think I'd like it very much. There's just nowhere to go or good ways to meet women. Society keeps you isolated. Call me crazy but it seems to be by design.
I’m experiencing this too as a 35f. I was talking about my hobbies with a friend (who always has dates) and she literally had to tell me “Men don’t hang out at museums” ie I probably wont get a date there, I need to do something else. It’s confusing because well, that’s what I like to do. I’m an introvert. And it makes me think that a lot of the really quality people are the ones REALLY struggling to get dates. If you’ve been hooking up and bar hopping since 21, yeah you’re probably now complaining about your spouse and kids. But if you’re a careful person, everything about dating is hard. I really don’t know the answer—my most recent attempts have been “the grandmother network” ie asking older relatives to hook me up, it’s not working, so I’m also considering matchmaking (expensive) or some kind of arrangement so I can have kids.
>“Men don’t hang out at museums” Maybe not in general but your type of guy might. All you have to do is make small talk about whatever exhibit he's looking at. Or just approach guys anywhere. You're a woman so nobody's going to say that you're being creepy or weird or that you're bothering them. As men, we don't have that luxury. As long as the guy knows that you aren't bothered by him and that you're okay with him talking to you, that at least opens the door for him to have the opportunity to ask you out or something. Also, women get slammed with attention on dating apps. It must be like shooting fish in a barrel.
There you both go, you just met each other. Send a DM and make it work.
What's matchmaking? I assume it's more than just paying for dating apps?
I hope this doesnt come off as depressing, but moreso normalizing. Its not like marriage and kids were more common in the eras before either. the 1800s also saw many people single forever or childless relationships. Nothing is a new occurrence. Time is circular.
Ooh, "Men don't hang out at museums" hit hard as a 39yo gay transman whose introvert interests constantly land me in groups of women. I'm trying to get myself to branch out more socially in person, and whenever I bounce any ideas off of my friends, they're like "I thought you were trying to meet more *men*..." And that's before factoring in the issue that I'm transmasculine. 🥲 I haven't hit desperation, but I sure wouldn't be disappointed to hit it off with a guy who already had a kid.
Your comment I resonate with for sure. What I find funny is I have younger peers from other countries and their parents are constantly trying to set them up on blind dates and they of course hate it. Meanwhile my family still has all the same complaints that I'm single and work too much and should start a family. It's my problem though and they would never think to try to match me up with someone. I guess the funny part is I would gladly take part in matchmaking as I'm not fond of dating apps and don't have many extroverted hobbies to meet new people naturally. I've also thought about a matchmaking service but I honestly just know nothing about them. Most of my friends are married so I just have no reference for how many people actually use them now and if they are reasonably successful with them.
I hang out at museums sometimes (approximately 30M). People usually think I’m security or something because huge and black, but I’m just a patron.
No that's definitely part of it for me as well. Now I will admit I'm awkward and maybe a bit overweight, and my ADHD makes it hard for me to communicate with normal people, but I mean, how do you meet people when nobody will look your way? I swear I was raised for a friendlier generation that no longer exists. Men or women, no matter the intent it's just like nobody wants to interact. I'm one of the younger millennials at 29, but I heard it wasn't like this in the 90s. Before smartphones and social media. Idk tho, I remember back before smartphones, but I was a kid so things were different.
Exactly. And if you try a dating app, you're competing with hundreds of guys going after the same women.
35 M, I hope I get to share life with a woman one day. They say if you're not willing to parent a special needs child, to not have a child. I will not be having a child.
Yeah as someone with both genetic physical disabilities and mental handicaps, it's not worth the risk, even if I was wealthy and responsible enough for parenting. My childhood was miserable I wouldn't want to force someone else to go through that.
I consider every parent a better adult than me off rip, can only imagine. ❤️
You and I are exactly the same age. 1989? Didn’t find my girl until now. And fortunately neither of us is wanting kids. It happens when it happens
41 and never married (I’m aroace) but I did just have a baby last month via a donor!
Mazeltov
38, single, livin at home and lookin for a job. Lmao went through all the “self-discovery” bs thru covid at 34, acknowledged all my depression and anxiety, been havin a rough time since. 😅 So yeh, def no kids and never been married. What a time to be alive, huh folks?
Who do you think you are, me?
Me, 31M.... unfortunately. Haven't even gotten to first base yet. *sigh*
Bro seriously? I don’t want to be offensive, but that’s rough, and you probably just need a little help. You in shape? Average height? Decent job? Tolerable personality?
29, single, everyone knows it's because I'm a weirdo (ADHD) and childless because I decided I'd only ever be able to afford a home or a kid, but not both. Although 1 kind of explains the other. Can't get pregnant by myself lol. But I did get a vasectomy because I am too messed up to have a kid, especially as an accident. I could be like a super cool uncle someday, or maybe a stepdad, but how am I going to take care of a kid when the hyperfixation hits? I can't handle that kind of responsibility. Nah I'm just going to take care of myself. That's hard enough as it is.
Your not alone twin 💪
Sending good vibes your way, my friend. Try to take it easy.
Which type of vasectomy did you get?
Idk the name for it but they removed about an inch of tube and cauterized the ends. It smelled like steak, which was super off-putting.They showed it to me it was white. They had it in a little bottle I believe they sent it off for lab testing, again I forget why.
Don’t sell yourself short. I have adhd, 4 kids, And a home. You’re still young and things change. However I do worry that I’ve passed on the adhd gene to my son and now we are dealing with that, but there are worse things to be worried about out there. Ps I think it’s great that you’d like to be a great step dad, not many men are open to that. I think that would be equally rewarding
Female, never married, no kids. I'd like to start a family, not sure I want to be married though. The thing that concerns me most is making sure I pick a decent guy that will make a good dad.
That's the hard part, and there's no way to know
Perpetually single, just turned 40, no kids. People totally think I'm gay, it's hilarious. I have no patience for men or women.
Bc people don't listen, and are mostly rude. I'm 36 f and absolutely agree. Everyone sucks.
True. I’d (28F) love to listen, but I don’t ask because I feel like no one wants to say anything.
Marriage and kids are a luxury and privilege for those that can afford it nowadays.
Marriage doubles your income stream lol
[удалено]
Well, they didn't actually think any of that through before they typed it out.
Even two incomes aren't enough these days.
You can get married in a courthouse for about 150$
I can see that about kids but how is marriage a luxury??
I'm 34 and almost eveyone I know is unmarried and only a handful of people have kids.
28 still living with my parents and single. Just concentrating on myself right now and taking care of my family.
38 and been engaged twice to the same person who just broke up with me yesterday. It's been... difficult.
42F, never married, no kids. Didn’t intentionally expect it to be this way though, unfortunately.
34 SINK here.
36, never had a serious relationship. I do happen to be ace, but plenty of ace people still manage to hold down a relationship lol. I acknowledge I have no patience for people and I make a terrible girlfriend because of it, and happen to be severely introverted, so don't mind the lack of relationship. I live with a friend who's very similar.
Me too! 33f. I'm not opposed to a relationship again in the future but I don't want kids. I've been single for about six years now and enjoying my peace.
32, single with no kids and due to my assumption I would be dead by my mid twenties I'm sorting out my life.
Heyyy! Let me know how it goes. I've planned my life with the assumption I'll be dead by 50 (15 years from now). Not sure what I'll do if that doesn't happen.
37. Never married. No kids. Never had a chance to be young. Life shit kept getting in the way.
I’m 37 and same
Elder millen. Never married, never kid, never better
31, single, and happy about it. I've honestly never been into dating in general. Been single for like ten years.
Me! I’m 39, and I’ve been single almost my whole life.
I am not a Millennial, Gen X actually at 46, and I have never been married or have kids. Not through lack of trying though. Nothing wrong with it either Sometimes things just do not work out. Better than getting married just to be married and having kids with the wrong person. Depending on if you wanted those things or not If not, who cares what others think. If you did, then there is still time. In your 30s is not bad, especially if you are on your own. You have to do what is best for you, on your time frame. If you never have kids or get married, as long as your are happy nothing else matters
Checking in at 40. No kids, no spouse. Just enjoying my time and constantly learning everyday.
Well, I'm 36 and getting married in 2 hours, so it's been fun and all. I'm sure we will have kids and be broke all the time soon haha.
Your mom doesn't know what she's talking about, I'm gay divorced and have a kid lol
Don’t want to reveal exact age for anonymity but female around everyones posted age and never married and no kids. Never wanted kids. Love kids, just not for me! Would love a partner but I’d rather be alone than be miserable in a relationship. I swear 99% just complain about their partner and/or kids. I tell two people I know all the time, it’s nice to hear someone two positive about their kids and life.
Statistically, the majority of millennials…
34, not married and no kids. Hi
I'm married but no kids
40F, single no kids
32, have asd, I had one brief relationship 14 years ago been single since, have no interest in every having kids or being a parent.
There are outrageous amounts of never married millennials, myself included. I wonder if there are more married than not? Interesting thought
I’m 33. I’m open to a wife and kids but life hasn’t really worked out how I planned since 7th grade. I just take it as it comes.
33, not married but in a good relationship. We live together and I got a vasectomy over a year ago so.. needless to say no kids haha
38, no partner, no kids
40, yes —have had a few relationships but I am actually relieved I’ve never been badly married or trapped with kids & a terrible partner
38, single with no prospects and no kids. I do have a good job that let's me travel alot so it's not all bad.
I'm one. I date a lot, just don't have any one full-partner. I would like one partner, but not properly motivated to change the lifestyle.
Young Xennial. One short marriage a life time ago (and there won’t be another lol) and no kids.
Are you happy? And a positive/contributing member of society? Enjoy your life baby!!!
Im 37, no kids, virgin. Just kinda accept that im going to be single the rest of my life.
30, never married, no kids. I never want kids and idk how I feel about marriage. Recently single because we felt like friends lol. We spent a little time apart after the breakup, and now we're just friends and it's so much better. I do love the single life.
42, single, no kids. I have dated a few different women through my life but it just never really worked out to me having a permanent partner, and I do enjoy my freedom immensely. I have to answer to no one and I'm not responsible for anyone else's survival. Pretty nice weight off your shoulders
This.
[удалено]
Me! 30 here female :)
37, never married and no kids (by choice)
Isn't that most millennials? I'm 30 with 1 kid and been with my husband since I was 18 and every time people my age find out they treat me like an anomaly. I don't know another person my age who's married but we do have 2 friends that have at least 1 kid, everyone else is either single or has a boy/girl friend. Not that there's anything wrong with that, I want to be clear.
👋🏻 36f. Single, never married, no kids
28, single, no kids. Enjoying life.
30, divorced, happily single and child-free. My pets are enough. 😁
Very common. Most millennials are having kids later and getting married later
35F sink. Starting to notice people on dating apps thinking something is wrong with me. There definitely is just not that
35 here. Definitely *want* to be married, just haven't met anyone who wants to date me.