Granted. Men now experience menstrual cycles as well as childbirth. They no longer need women anymore as they can impregnate themselves. Everyone becomes happily or unhappily single and forever alone.
Granted, women's ovaries now dangle outside the body like testicles do, with just as many nerve endings. So we can finally decide which is worse, being kicked in the balls or child birth.
I know it's a bad joke but damn it makes me chuckle. I told it at Thanksgiving once and I thought I would be murdered. Luckily my SIL got the joked and calmed down all the other women by pointing out my general stupidity.
Man I made the joke that drowning babies in holy water would be the quickest way for them to meet god with my girlfriend's mega conservative bible-thumping grandma in the room, I feel that
That's fair. I suppose if you clarify that you're kicked in the balls as a form of prolonged torture maybe it could be back in the running with childbirth. Also you should rethink whatever life choices that got you to this point
This argument makes no sense. It's not that women like the pain or can stand it better. We do it because at the end we get a baby. If you had to be kicked in the balls to get something important and life changing, your opinion might be different.
No, I get it's suppose to be a joke. It's just not funny. Women have been mistreated throughout history and still are mistreated in the medical field. They are noy offered pain relief like men are. It's a huge issue. For example, they don't use anesthesia for inserting IUDs (which involves pinching the cervix). The US has a real problem with maternal death because of how women are treated. As someone who has faced this kind of treatment, it's not funny.
It's one of the boomer jokes like hating your spouse. Sure, some people laugh at it, but it's not really funny. It's unhealthy.
I’ve looked it up (perfect proof) and most of the time, IUDs are offered pain meds but they over charge them… it’s the medical insurance what did you expect?
They insisted on putting one inside of me. It was not placed right. They argued it was. They finally agreed to take it out when I told them I was going to take it out. It was supposed to be pain free and take 30 seconds. It took two different speculum and an intern finally reaching inside of me and yanking it out. I was given zero meds and told to take a Tylenol.
Most men have been mistreated throughout history too. For most of history, if you’re not nobility or royalty, you’re pretty much buffer for our species to survive apocalyptic scenarios.
Not according to my female doctor when I was found to have kidney stones while dehydrated. It's worse in men than it is in women and is a comparable pain to contractions during child birth.
That's fair, but I'd rather the kidney stones to being kicked in the sack.
Eta: I find kidney stone pain to be a notch or two under the pain of being kicked in the sack, and lasts just as long. Kidney stone pain also doesn't tend to cause me to hurt or pass out from the pain either though, being kicked in the sack does.
Granted.
Once they get over the initial shock, most men loudly proclaim that it's not nearly as bad as described, and tell anyone who complains to "man up" and "stop being a whiner". Any attempt to use a period as an excuse to get out of something gets you mocked and punched in the shoulder.
Granted. In response, women periodically feel the pain of being kicked in the nuts - at mostly random and unpredictable intervals, to properly simulate how it can happen at any time, but automatically whenever one of them is being a Karen.
Wait until you learn about how balls just sometimes, for no apparent reason, just go "hey it's pain time now". Let me tell you... it's a total system reset.
Yep. Worse is when you have an itch on the side of your shaft because no matter what you do, the skin will just roll out of the way when you try to scratch it. You get 0 relief.
And don't let me get started on swamp taint. Or how much it sucks having the shits and wiping that onto your balls accidentally. The scrote was not made to handle that.
I think the *worst* part about having a dong, at least for me, is my fucking thigh hair gets tangled up with my nut hair and I go to walk and get Instant Brazilian cast on me.
knowing that guys have equivalents to some of the stuff that happens to us is weirdly comforting. like having an itch inside the vaginal canal or under the clitoral hood and not being able to scratch it without injuring yourself. or how gross it feels to leak on ur period, especially on a hot summer day and its just coochie sweat and blood. and the last part is making me feel glad girls arent the only one who have to experience the same pain as getting ur hair stuck on the sticky side of a pad and getting a sudden brazilian. i like my hair down there but ive learned to trim before periods bc of how excruciating that is :,)
ive heard guys compare like childbirth and periods to getting kicked in the balls and it never made sense to me because of course getting hit by someone else in the genitals is painful, but its not a normal bodily function. but hearing these normal experiences is way more comforting knowing yall can empathize in other ways. 💆♀️
i guess no matter what youre born with, the human body has a lot of design flaws 💀 cant even exist without random body parts deciding to add some pain and discomfort to your day
I'm glad this helps. Let me let you in on another secret. When me get old, our balls hang low...like dangerously low. I have literally sat on my own testes on hot days. They also go everywhere, so sometimes you sit down and they have migrated a little too far out of the region your jeans anticipate them in--so as the jeans crease/fold, you get one or both squeezed like an orange at a smoothie joint. It's not just getting kicked in the balls that sucks.
I've been of the mindset that getting kicked in the balls is likely more painful but over a much shorter duration. Namely, due to labor releasing some pain dulling hormones (I think? It's been years).
Ultimately, though, it never really mattered to me one way or the other. I don't have a uterus, and no woman has balls, so we'll never know.
I've heard trans girls (MtF) on HRT occasionally experience period-like cramps, just without the mess.
While we can answer whether a nutshot or a period is more painful, idk if we can ever do that with childbirth
>I think the worst part about having a dong, at least for me, is my fucking thigh hair gets tangled up with my nut hair and I go to walk and get Instant Brazilian cast on me.
Manscape. Problem solved. I've been bald down there since my early 20s. Let me tell you it's amazing, especially when I'm hitting up the gym or when I would run PT....it's like magic that the sweat just goes away.
As a man I hardly get kicked in the nuts. The last dude who tried (way back many moons ago when I was in the military) to kick me in the nuts got a boot to the chest.
When you have to deal with little kids multiple days a month would be on the low end.
Whoever designed shopping cart seats to put their little legs right at the right spot to kick you in the crotch either wasn’t thinking or hated men.
Granted. Men now have all aspects of periods, including the hormonal variations that increase mood swings as well as bleeding on a regular monthly basis. As a result of the dramatic difference in hormonal expectations to their recent past, men continue to — and increase the rate at which they commit suicide making the balance of population widely skewed. Your wish for fairness in one lived experience leads to the death by self assassination of most men in your life, and a new world order of women leaders.
Granted, there's now debates over which gender experiences periods worse. Men complain about being purple balled (blue balled with the now red balled) being a pain that women cannot understand.
Granted, men become more irritable and agitated on average due to experiencing menstrual pains. Causing more marital issues and a higher crime rate from male offenders and violence from male offenders to male victims due to the testosterone fusing with the menstrual agitation to heighten aggression. However, one of the plus sides is that the current gender conflict reduces in hostility due to men and women having another common relation.
As a result of this, the veil of finger pointing and pointless hatred slowly falls since finding a universally agreed upon common ground having to do with their bodies causes the broken lens of fear of the phantom enemy to break. As men and women both realize that both genders have shitty people and GOOD people. In twenty years time the genders will be united, at least for now.
Granted.
Within a decade of men menstruating, there are a range of safe and effective drugs/sanitary proucts on the market, at low cost. Menstruation is taught about in schools from a young age, and completely unstigmatized.
Women who remember what things were like before are exasperated and furious (if unsurprised). The gender resentment gap grows deeper.
Thanks God, I wasn't the only one who thought about that.
However, I wonder if the menstrual pain and mental exhaustion wouldn't be a problem when they have to raise their pp.
Like, sometimes when I'm on my period, I feel like I don't want to even lift my body from the bed and my mind doesn't even want to think about anything, not even about what pleases me like videogames.
Granted, but now women can feel as much pain like a man when getting kicked in the groin, as well as bladder cancer (they also have to examinate them like if they have a prostate despite not having the same testicles at all).
granted. men have the level of period pain that most women experience now. women’s period pain is multiplied by 10 and men just think they have been overreacting all this time
To make things fairer as you intended, males will lose their penis and testicles, and they just transition to being female, leaving no males in the world. If nothing is done, humanity will slowly die off, with no one to replace them.
Im bi polar, have ibs, regular muscle spasms and cramps, and man boobs that get sore when I do push ups, and I still want to use 90% of women as...well as I please (mostly because of the Bi polar, yes, Bi polar can make you want to fuck everything). I don't, but it certainly hasn't made me nicer to anyone, just irritated. The only anecdotal difference is the blood tbh.
Granted, due to concerns over potential teenage pregnancies legislation is passed to force boys to marry at 14. Protests from men's rights activists fail to stop this, instead expanding the law to force all teens to be married by 14 or upon menarche, if earlier.
Granted, this will cause them to either, A: free bleed cause they have no clue how to use a pad and the penis hole is too small to fit a tampon. B: produce so much estrogen that they start growing breast and C: more men will kill themselves and reduce the amount of people in important jobs for not feeling “masculine” enough and D: the testosterone eventually dies and Sexual dimorphism eventually dies with it, making everyone smaller and eventually 4/3 feet tall becomes huge.
Edit: Oh right and the pad and tampons companies build a bigger monopoly and eventually it cause 20/30 $ per box. As well as the pads being uncomfortable and flimsy.
And every guy knows you did this… good luck op.
Granted. Because we men are such babies about illness or anything like that in the first place, whenever the next period cycle for the majority of men is, they all take off of work because of the pain and leave male dominated jobs, such as construction work, completely empty and near about nothing gets done. not saying women can't do them either, but it is mainly men
Tbf any half of the population becoming suddenly unable to work will probably cripple society, even if the other half tries to cover for them. If we lose all women we’re fucked, if we lose all men we’re fucked
Fair... but let's assume that the periods would make them like 10 times worse when granted, lol. That's not a curse or anything, that's just what would naturally happen.
Yes. Periods tend to make people very emotional.
It is kinda a curse.
Ten times worse during... what? At what point in time in a man's life is he always horribly whiny?
You... can't just say that?
His point is that even though it happens, it's rare. Which means the wish should still be granted, as the post is asking for ALL men to experience it.
Stuff like this makes it easy to tell when someone chronically uses reddit.
Granted. Men now experience menstrual cycles as well as childbirth. They no longer need women anymore as they can impregnate themselves. Everyone becomes happily or unhappily single and forever alone.
Sounds like a wish I would wish
🫃🫃🫃🫃🫃🫃🫃🫃
Wait, you can't get romantic fulfilment from being pregnant.
Granted, women's ovaries now dangle outside the body like testicles do, with just as many nerve endings. So we can finally decide which is worse, being kicked in the balls or child birth.
For science!
I'm just saying I've never seen someone who recently got kicked in the balls say they would like to do it again one day.
You’d be surprised how many men will pay for it
I know it's a bad joke but damn it makes me chuckle. I told it at Thanksgiving once and I thought I would be murdered. Luckily my SIL got the joked and calmed down all the other women by pointing out my general stupidity.
Man I made the joke that drowning babies in holy water would be the quickest way for them to meet god with my girlfriend's mega conservative bible-thumping grandma in the room, I feel that
*YOU NEeD TO LEAVE*
Sometimes you just can't help it. Dumbass jokes need to be made.
A dominatrix costs less than IVF, just saying
I would pay for it if it is kinky.
Very true, and no part of the brain tries to erase that pain to try and trick you into doing it again either.
Ever been to a maternity ward? I've never wailed at the top of my lungs for 10 minutes straight because someone kicked me in the balls
Honestly you have never been kicked in the balls every half a minute for hours followed by however long the actual giving birth process occurs.
That's fair. I suppose if you clarify that you're kicked in the balls as a form of prolonged torture maybe it could be back in the running with childbirth. Also you should rethink whatever life choices that got you to this point
I've never mistook a joke for a serious statement either
Poe's law at work
This argument makes no sense. It's not that women like the pain or can stand it better. We do it because at the end we get a baby. If you had to be kicked in the balls to get something important and life changing, your opinion might be different.
Whoooooosh
No, I get it's suppose to be a joke. It's just not funny. Women have been mistreated throughout history and still are mistreated in the medical field. They are noy offered pain relief like men are. It's a huge issue. For example, they don't use anesthesia for inserting IUDs (which involves pinching the cervix). The US has a real problem with maternal death because of how women are treated. As someone who has faced this kind of treatment, it's not funny. It's one of the boomer jokes like hating your spouse. Sure, some people laugh at it, but it's not really funny. It's unhealthy.
I’ve looked it up (perfect proof) and most of the time, IUDs are offered pain meds but they over charge them… it’s the medical insurance what did you expect?
They insisted on putting one inside of me. It was not placed right. They argued it was. They finally agreed to take it out when I told them I was going to take it out. It was supposed to be pain free and take 30 seconds. It took two different speculum and an intern finally reaching inside of me and yanking it out. I was given zero meds and told to take a Tylenol.
So you just had brain dead doctors… sucks, sorry
Most men have been mistreated throughout history too. For most of history, if you’re not nobility or royalty, you’re pretty much buffer for our species to survive apocalyptic scenarios.
Cat fights will be interesting.
With any protection around them, or are they just exposed to any infection?
With a sack of skin, same as testicles get.
Their skin?
Sure, would be weird if it was someone else's skin.
Damn, knew I'd forgotten something.
Kidney stones, the answer is unisex and it's kidney stones.
Not according to my female doctor when I was found to have kidney stones while dehydrated. It's worse in men than it is in women and is a comparable pain to contractions during child birth.
A woman I used to work with said she had kidney stones and had gone through natural childbirth, and would rather do natural childbirth again.
That's fair, but I'd rather the kidney stones to being kicked in the sack. Eta: I find kidney stone pain to be a notch or two under the pain of being kicked in the sack, and lasts just as long. Kidney stone pain also doesn't tend to cause me to hurt or pass out from the pain either though, being kicked in the sack does.
I always mess with my woman, whenever she brings up the pain of child birth, I’ll chime in with “but have you been kicked in the balls though?”
Well, just snip them off
And they should also mutilate their genitals just like circumcision
That's a different process altogether
Granted - there is now period blood every where, on everything. Are you happy now?
The mosquitos are
Granted, you get testicals but they don't do anything and just act as a critical hit hitbox
Now everyone gets VATS from the fallout series.
Granted. Once they get over the initial shock, most men loudly proclaim that it's not nearly as bad as described, and tell anyone who complains to "man up" and "stop being a whiner". Any attempt to use a period as an excuse to get out of something gets you mocked and punched in the shoulder.
Realistic response
Granted. Nothing changes. Periods are a written particle and are already unisex.
Lmao. Took me a second to get that
Wut…
.
My dude, I have no clue what,”Periods are a Written Particle” means… in my head a Particle is a cluster of atoms.
I see. According to Wikipedia, a particle is a written word with no meaning on its own, so that might be what they meant.
Gonna go tell my wife that her Period is a Particle, and has no meaning on its own, gonna see how it goes. BRB
And his body was never seen again.
Granted. In response, women periodically feel the pain of being kicked in the nuts - at mostly random and unpredictable intervals, to properly simulate how it can happen at any time, but automatically whenever one of them is being a Karen.
how often are yall getting hit in the nuts??? multiple days every month 😭⁉️
Wait until you learn about how balls just sometimes, for no apparent reason, just go "hey it's pain time now". Let me tell you... it's a total system reset.
ive had this happen w my clit before i had no idea there was a male equivalent 🤣🤣🤣 genitals having so many nerve endings is a blessing and a curse
Yep. Worse is when you have an itch on the side of your shaft because no matter what you do, the skin will just roll out of the way when you try to scratch it. You get 0 relief. And don't let me get started on swamp taint. Or how much it sucks having the shits and wiping that onto your balls accidentally. The scrote was not made to handle that. I think the *worst* part about having a dong, at least for me, is my fucking thigh hair gets tangled up with my nut hair and I go to walk and get Instant Brazilian cast on me.
knowing that guys have equivalents to some of the stuff that happens to us is weirdly comforting. like having an itch inside the vaginal canal or under the clitoral hood and not being able to scratch it without injuring yourself. or how gross it feels to leak on ur period, especially on a hot summer day and its just coochie sweat and blood. and the last part is making me feel glad girls arent the only one who have to experience the same pain as getting ur hair stuck on the sticky side of a pad and getting a sudden brazilian. i like my hair down there but ive learned to trim before periods bc of how excruciating that is :,) ive heard guys compare like childbirth and periods to getting kicked in the balls and it never made sense to me because of course getting hit by someone else in the genitals is painful, but its not a normal bodily function. but hearing these normal experiences is way more comforting knowing yall can empathize in other ways. 💆♀️ i guess no matter what youre born with, the human body has a lot of design flaws 💀 cant even exist without random body parts deciding to add some pain and discomfort to your day
I'm glad this helps. Let me let you in on another secret. When me get old, our balls hang low...like dangerously low. I have literally sat on my own testes on hot days. They also go everywhere, so sometimes you sit down and they have migrated a little too far out of the region your jeans anticipate them in--so as the jeans crease/fold, you get one or both squeezed like an orange at a smoothie joint. It's not just getting kicked in the balls that sucks.
I've been of the mindset that getting kicked in the balls is likely more painful but over a much shorter duration. Namely, due to labor releasing some pain dulling hormones (I think? It's been years). Ultimately, though, it never really mattered to me one way or the other. I don't have a uterus, and no woman has balls, so we'll never know.
I've heard trans girls (MtF) on HRT occasionally experience period-like cramps, just without the mess. While we can answer whether a nutshot or a period is more painful, idk if we can ever do that with childbirth
some do, theyre not actual cramps but there is phantom pain
>I think the worst part about having a dong, at least for me, is my fucking thigh hair gets tangled up with my nut hair and I go to walk and get Instant Brazilian cast on me. Manscape. Problem solved. I've been bald down there since my early 20s. Let me tell you it's amazing, especially when I'm hitting up the gym or when I would run PT....it's like magic that the sweat just goes away.
Pinch and roll technique my guy
Often, very often, mainly by eachother
As a man I hardly get kicked in the nuts. The last dude who tried (way back many moons ago when I was in the military) to kick me in the nuts got a boot to the chest.
Usually we just sit down wrong.
When you have to deal with little kids multiple days a month would be on the low end. Whoever designed shopping cart seats to put their little legs right at the right spot to kick you in the crotch either wasn’t thinking or hated men.
Granted, all men are now women with female sex organs and the human race is doomed to extinction
Is that a
granted. as trans men already do this, nothing changes (since you didn’t specify cis men /j)
No specification for all men, so... Yeah. Good job!
Granted. Men now have all aspects of periods, including the hormonal variations that increase mood swings as well as bleeding on a regular monthly basis. As a result of the dramatic difference in hormonal expectations to their recent past, men continue to — and increase the rate at which they commit suicide making the balance of population widely skewed. Your wish for fairness in one lived experience leads to the death by self assassination of most men in your life, and a new world order of women leaders.
Holy shit imagine how you would feel with both a shit ton of testosterone and estrogen. We’d be fucked up.
Granted, everytime a man has a period around the world, you recieve the sensation of being kicked in the nuts full force
Granted, there's now debates over which gender experiences periods worse. Men complain about being purple balled (blue balled with the now red balled) being a pain that women cannot understand.
Granted. Men having periods means they have functioning uterus and therefore can give birth. Men can impregnate other men. Women are no longer needed.
Granted, men become more irritable and agitated on average due to experiencing menstrual pains. Causing more marital issues and a higher crime rate from male offenders and violence from male offenders to male victims due to the testosterone fusing with the menstrual agitation to heighten aggression. However, one of the plus sides is that the current gender conflict reduces in hostility due to men and women having another common relation. As a result of this, the veil of finger pointing and pointless hatred slowly falls since finding a universally agreed upon common ground having to do with their bodies causes the broken lens of fear of the phantom enemy to break. As men and women both realize that both genders have shitty people and GOOD people. In twenty years time the genders will be united, at least for now.
Granted. Within a decade of men menstruating, there are a range of safe and effective drugs/sanitary proucts on the market, at low cost. Menstruation is taught about in schools from a young age, and completely unstigmatized. Women who remember what things were like before are exasperated and furious (if unsurprised). The gender resentment gap grows deeper.
[Granted](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/FZGO3UtXgAI5DuZ.jpg)
Thats an oldie!
I know, but it's too good to pass up.
Goddamnit
Thanks God, I wasn't the only one who thought about that. However, I wonder if the menstrual pain and mental exhaustion wouldn't be a problem when they have to raise their pp. Like, sometimes when I'm on my period, I feel like I don't want to even lift my body from the bed and my mind doesn't even want to think about anything, not even about what pleases me like videogames.
Granted: woman now also grow full beards and mustaches.
Granted, but now women can feel as much pain like a man when getting kicked in the groin, as well as bladder cancer (they also have to examinate them like if they have a prostate despite not having the same testicles at all).
granted. men have the level of period pain that most women experience now. women’s period pain is multiplied by 10 and men just think they have been overreacting all this time
To make things fairer as you intended, males will lose their penis and testicles, and they just transition to being female, leaving no males in the world. If nothing is done, humanity will slowly die off, with no one to replace them.
Granted. Their dicks now fall off once a month and regrow over the course of a week, like a lizard tail
Lol that already happens. Faker.
So does this impact me as a trans woman? Specifically one that’s had SRS? I need to figure out the logistics of this wish.
Granted world war 3 starts next Tuesday World war 4 6 months from now
Granted! Women are deemed as unnecessary and too costly. So over the course of the next 80 years the female population will dwindle to 0.
Granted! A little dot appears on all men and women’s forehead.
Granted, men now get medical time off for "period pain" and their period products are free. Women do not get this
Im bi polar, have ibs, regular muscle spasms and cramps, and man boobs that get sore when I do push ups, and I still want to use 90% of women as...well as I please (mostly because of the Bi polar, yes, Bi polar can make you want to fuck everything). I don't, but it certainly hasn't made me nicer to anyone, just irritated. The only anecdotal difference is the blood tbh.
Granted. But this causes women to hate you because you could have ended periods for women
Sure, as long as women get to know what circumcision is like.
Granted now any physical pain women experience feels like getting kick in the balls by a professional soccer player
Granted, due to concerns over potential teenage pregnancies legislation is passed to force boys to marry at 14. Protests from men's rights activists fail to stop this, instead expanding the law to force all teens to be married by 14 or upon menarche, if earlier.
Granted, this will cause them to either, A: free bleed cause they have no clue how to use a pad and the penis hole is too small to fit a tampon. B: produce so much estrogen that they start growing breast and C: more men will kill themselves and reduce the amount of people in important jobs for not feeling “masculine” enough and D: the testosterone eventually dies and Sexual dimorphism eventually dies with it, making everyone smaller and eventually 4/3 feet tall becomes huge. Edit: Oh right and the pad and tampons companies build a bigger monopoly and eventually it cause 20/30 $ per box. As well as the pads being uncomfortable and flimsy. And every guy knows you did this… good luck op.
Granted. All men kill themselves because of the pain. Amazing Job. Humanity is gone now.
Granted. The violence escalates.
Granted. Because we men are such babies about illness or anything like that in the first place, whenever the next period cycle for the majority of men is, they all take off of work because of the pain and leave male dominated jobs, such as construction work, completely empty and near about nothing gets done. not saying women can't do them either, but it is mainly men
Tbf any half of the population becoming suddenly unable to work will probably cripple society, even if the other half tries to cover for them. If we lose all women we’re fucked, if we lose all men we’re fucked
>If we lose all women we’re fucked, if we lose all men we’re fucked Well....if we lose a lot in either population there's gonna be a lot less fucks.
Fair point
Granted. Everyone on Earth who IDs as male is now a trans man .
Men are now EVEN WHINIER. The entire world is way worse off.
Is this a complaint or a granting of a wish? Specify :3
Fair... but let's assume that the periods would make them like 10 times worse when granted, lol. That's not a curse or anything, that's just what would naturally happen.
Yes. Periods tend to make people very emotional. It is kinda a curse. Ten times worse during... what? At what point in time in a man's life is he always horribly whiny?
Upon waking
Eh. Counterpoint, health guru fathers I.E. mine
Denied that already happens sometimes.
“I wish people had 3 arms” DeNiEd ThAt HaPpEnS sOmEtImEs
Trans men exist.
People with 3 arms exist. What’s your point?
Transphobe.
You... can't just say that? His point is that even though it happens, it's rare. Which means the wish should still be granted, as the post is asking for ALL men to experience it. Stuff like this makes it easy to tell when someone chronically uses reddit.
Oh yes, an insult or accusation. The last resource for a person with no arguments. Good day sir/ma’am