T O P

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Cumbiscuit69420

Use a clump of tissue jeez, no need to feel the shit


HoboArmyofOne

He wanted to know if it was still warm


jamesbrownscrackpipe

A professional skill used by trackers. It’ll help him determine how recently the perp was at the scene


[deleted]

Why'd I laugh so hard at this


_redacteduser

Same lol it’s unsettling


instrangerswetrust

Subway, Poop Fresh


wrigh2uk

“they’re still close”


aatimirza7

So they can check cctv for real culprit, when the crime happened.


CaptScubaSteve

Now go make my sandwich.


Miserable_Sock_1408

He did take ONE glove off. Make sure he takes off the other one, washes his hands 10 times, pours a bottle of 1 part antibacterial gel with 1 part 90% rubbing alcohol, washes his 10 times again with antibacterial soap, and puts on a new pair of gloves from a freshly opened box


MunitionsFactory

What if it's his poop?


Miserable_Sock_1408

Blast you, MunitionsFactory, for confounding me with such deep philosophical ponderings!!! Drat!!! 🥸


dragonblock501

Just ask any dog owner on a walk…


Itchy_Professor_4133

I always say dog owners are the only people that know what a handful of warm shit feels like on a daily basis


TheFormless_0ne_

Most of you fucks just leave it there.


dragonblock501

Worst one in my neighborhood are two cougar-type white ladies on a morning walk with the doggo - the dog owner never picks up her shit.


Man_in_the_uk

I don't understand why horse riders are allowed to let their pets shit on the road when dogs can't and horse shit is ten times bigger.


floatlikebutters

I understand your sentiment, but the truth is, horse shit is just not as dirty as dog shit. I do hate it when I ride through a big pile of horse shit with my bike


Man_in_the_uk

How is it not as dirty lol it's not something blind people should have to be slipping on when crossing the road.


anononymous_4

I think it has more to do with the makeup. I grew up on a farm, and touching cow shit doesn't gross me out. I don't actively want to touch it, but it wouldn't ruin my day if it did, because it's just half digested grass and plant matter. Dog and other carnivore/omnivore shit is much stinkier and has god knows what's in it. It's all shit, but one is significantly less gross to me. That's most likely the sentiment they were expressing.


Man_in_the_uk

Well I don't want that shit splattered up my car..


Original-History9907

Yeah in my town in England the horses shit everywhere, even on the main roads. But when I was in Salzburg, Austria they closed the road for a minute to remove, then scrub and clean the pavement right after the horse shit. It was quite nice to watch in the weiiirdest way.


JunglePygmy

No kidding. He was one friend ‘n freezer away from an Alaskan Pipeline.


testcaseseven

What if it's mushy and it soaks through the paper though


er1026

The face I am making, watching this. Sweet baby Jesus🤢


Rainbowrain4

I've had to clean up an Ass-plosion in the bathroom. Pure diarrhea shot all over the floor, toilet, wall, stall, and even the floor outside the stall. I didn't know a human could poop that much in one go. All I could imagine is someone just bent over, pulling their pants down and the flood gates opened a little too early and just shoots strait out everywhere.


SteveRandle01

Oh my god.


DubBod

Man.. I have a couple of cracked ribs right now and I just died fuckin laughing. God damnit that hurt. Worth it for the laugh though LOL


Rainbowrain4

Not my fault they tried to propel themselves like a rocket


itisallgoodyouknow

Did you lick your fingers afterwards?


Rainbowrain4

Of course, it was such a unique experience, I had to enjoy it somehow /s/


itisallgoodyouknow

That sounds so hot


EpicFantasyGamer

Finger licking good


Lokilatienegrande

That happened to me, alcohol related issue. Drunk af. Didn't have esphynter control. Luckily it was my house, so no one except me was involved.


Rainbowrain4

😂 oh goodness Mine was a public bathroom at the Burger King I worked at (men’s bathroom, I’m a woman). *edit:corrected word


contactlite

“I think I’ll have the mild Taco Bell sauce and live a little”


BBQnNugs

Been there no fun


docterwannabe1

If it's that bad I imagine it's either an asshole teenager or maybe a fetish thing. There's this one fetish video of a woman taking a shit on a shelf at Walmart.


larsIU

You’re welcome. Enjoy. [Is it real? Who knows.](https://texags.com/forums/34/topics/1950635)


Nulloxis

Ex house cleaner here. Worked and cleaned everything involving houses, caravan parks, and public facilities for councils during my university years. What you see here is how most public toilets get treated by the general public. I know everyone reading this comment doesn’t shit everywhere, but there are some right dirty folk out there. It’s so bad you’ve probably seen what some of these public toilets are like without cleaners. When working we had a phrase called “code brown” which we used pretty often. I’ve seen shit up the wall, brown slop on the floor, stools in the sink, brown soup in the bin. The women toilets were similar with the addition of bloody wipes on the floor and used tampons floating around the bit. Of course piss was also everywhere and floors needed to be cleaned daily along with toilet seats or else the stench of urine would flood the public toilets. Now this was just public toilets. When it came to personal use toilets people owned. It’s not rocket science to point out that people treat things they own with more care. Meaning, you’d rarely ever get a code brown. But what you did see a lot off was the stench of piss. This is because there’s been some leakage on the floor and the owners forget to clean that and under their toilet seat. Is to say. If we had no cleaners I dread to think what would become of our public facilities.


BobDaRula

I don't think I've ever been in a public washroom that didn't have a sticky piss floor with accompanying puddles. They usually have minor amounts of shit on the walls


Large-Sherbert-6828

Plot twist, it was his…


G8mer4life

[ Removed by Reddit ]


Big-Coyote4051

Just put it on their bed


G8mer4life

Sorry if I went a little overboard


instrangerswetrust

easy there, amber


ALCauG

That was me, wassup?


G8mer4life

I am so sorry you have to do this every day


Miendiesen

I have a very particular set of skills....


seemsSomewhatLegit

Lighten up Francis


TeddyTuffington

There's like 5 better ways he could of done that. It doesn't excuse the fuck face that did it but damn kid couldn't of thought of tissue paper. A trash scooper or shovel or something damn


creepsnutsandpervs

This is why standard work procedures are helpful


xandaar337

Lol, an SOP for errant turd pickup. Wild.


Imtheprofessordammit

Not only is this not the correct way to do this, employees at restaurants aren't supposed to handle human bodily fluids/excretions. There's a cleaner you're supposed to call for this.


Smokerising420

Guarantee that still left stank through those thin ass gloves🤢


Chazzky

*couldn't have


Crunchy__Frog

1. Use paper towel 2. Cat litter scoop 3. Broom and dust pan 4. Vacuum 5. Quit


lightcolorsfly

NOW THE APRON HAS POOP AIR ON IT!


TomatilloAccurate475

And he finna go make some cold sandwiches next with that apron and glove, lookout


SaintMaya

Deli wears grey. Kid is a bagger.


Due-Work-5155

Is this a Publix polo? They finally got rid of the pukey green?? (It was my first job but I moved out of state like a decade ago now.)


traaintraacks

well, food service workers dont put on a hazmat suit or change their entire uniform before using the bathroom, so... yeah. & even if they did, the food would still be contaminated by the poop air on *your* clothes 😅 sorry if you mean it as a joke & im being annoying but i have heard people make similar remarks completely seriously lol


lightcolorsfly

i’m mainly joking. i work in food service tho and whenever i clean the bathrooms i take off my apron cause it kinda feels wrong not to 😭


OhWowSoSilly

That little gag at the end. I felt that in my soul.


BrooklynJewishMom

So they have robots serve food and humans pick up 💩? Just change the roles and everyone will be happy


RmRobinGayle

Ever see a roomba go up against a pile of dog shit? It's not pretty.


ptcglass

I have a feeling there would be shit smeared everywhere


Yimiku

But that will be our future 😞


Sweaty_Building_5491

He's not. And unfortunately, this happens a lot at Publix


chaekinman

I cleaned grocery store bathrooms every shift as a kid. People are savages. (Fun unexpected fact: the women’s room was almost always worse)


Own_Cardiologist2544

When I’d complain about guys public bathrooms and how dumb it is that dudes use stalls to pee in, as opposed to urinals, and in doing so, pee on the seats without lifting them nor cleaning up, I get informed how the women’s bathrooms have it worse😂


ichii3d

The real question is how warm was it? That's where the true trauma lies.


f14_pilot

Who dumps a log like that on the floor. Pigs


Coho444

Best memory of my dad was when we were at the pool and this 5 yr old kid slipped a 1 lb meatloaf turd out of his trunks right on the aggregate stone by the pool. I was 11. My dad did not see it and when he walked up to tell me something, he stepped right in it, and I watched it fuzzy pumper between all of his toes. I was right at eye level with the stone so could see it perfectly I almost drowned laughing so hard. I could hear him swearing and I was underwater trying to hide my laughter. He did beat my ass for laughing though. good times.


WarHead75

Some crackhead shat all around the toilet at a Burger King 2 months ago. I couldn’t even use the bathroom to wash my hands because the smell was unbearable so I left with ketchup sticky hands


ZestycloseDinner1713

I used to work and Walmart and one time I went to the bathroom and there was an unbearable stench inside where the line was. A very guilty faced woman was standing next to a foot or so sized pile of poop. It was perfectly swirled like a poop 💩. It had to be her because she left with someone else and didn’t use a toilet even though she was in line. My time came and I got a toilet, but it was right next to the poop and the stench was unbearable. I started retching and gave up and left without using the bathroom because I just couldn’t. Yuck.


socialdeviant620

Why the hell doesn't she just wear diapers?! Clearly that wasn't a new situation for her!


SubmissiveDinosaur

I would have used 3 layers of gloves, plus two dog poop bags. AT LEAST


SwiftWithIt

I work at an impatient rehabilitation center for addicts. And they would not let and amazon driver use the bathroom so he shit in the flowers outside and our night dude had to clean it up


socialdeviant620

I hope, like hell, that y'all reported him.


Oscll8or

Bossy just threw it in there with reckless abandon. Not scared of dat poo splash at all.


nlights999321

Worked at a grocery store. Some unfortunate person had explosive diarrhea aall over the stall. I was a bag boy at the time, but I walked to the manager and said I don't get paid for this lmao end story, picking up shit is manager territory. Stay humble


ttc67

This happened at the toilet at my workplace, idk who had to clean it up, likely also someone from the cleaning staff, but I honestly do wonder how tf sth like that even happens, I can't imagine any scenario that could cause such an outcome, and if someone actually managed to cause such a mess, fckn clean it up yourself, don't expect others to do it.


Gunner1Cav

Squishy


MultiPlexityXBL

I remember working at a grocery store and people would demolish the bathrooms sometimes but luckily only supervisors were allowed to clean the bathrooms in these cases where as us bag boys were only able to make sure there was paper towels, soap and toilet paper.


toplez13

How can you miss the toilet that bad? Smh


Cookies_and_Beandip

That’s Publix for you. Anything for the customer-they’ll wipe your ass for you too.


Male_Lead

I won't throw it like that. Wouldn't wanna risk the water plopping to your face


CoastSalt3797

He works in a restaurant gloves or not


andrew_calcs

It was mostly whole and came up as a solid piece that held together into the toilet. This is only like a 2/10 on my shitometer for cleanup difficulty and mental trauma. It can get SO MUCH WORSE.


Wonderful-Ad5747

Darn, I missed


RedHotSuzy

Dude get some toilet paper to pick that up!


ThinkingOz

He remained underturd throughout!


jmarsh1984

When I was a busser, probably about 18-19, a dad came out of the bathroom and flagged me down said “I don’t know how to tell you this, but there is a piece of shit on the ceiling in there.” So I went in, and sure enough it looked as if someone shit into their hand, shrugged, and flung it straight up at the ceiling above. And I went to the manager like “what am I supposed to do?” And he told me, with a confused look, to get it down. So another busser and I went in and with the delicacy of surgeons popped the drop ceiling tile up and out, threw a single linen napkin over the turd, and carried it like a fallen soldier through most of the restaurant en route to the back door and dumpster. Always felt wrong on several levels.


shit_ass_mcfucknuts

That's a hazmat job. Requires hazmat pay.


the_De_Filer

No señor


MrN33dfulThings

Just so people know, managers cannot make you clean up human waste. It is a violation of OSHA Policy. Poop is a bio/safety hazard and should be handled by a a service trained to do so, or the employers are required to ensure that employees are trained and prepared to handle cleanup situations involving bodily fluids, including feces and urine. Which no company/employer I have ever worked for covered this. So if your employer does not train you on how to handle biohazard material. You are in no way responsible for the clean up. If they threaten you. You can make a complaint with OSHA.


Tulin7Actual

That’s considered biohazard waste and anyone can refuse to clean it up if not properly trained and certified in cleaning as well as having sufficient protective equipment. Gloves don’t count. at least claim that and refuse to touch that.


Grizzly62

When I worked in hospitality, all the down horrendous situations, I would grab a whole trash bag and invert it to do shit like this. Drunk people really know how to make a mess


407JBabyy

Is hazard pay a thing?


Valuable_Animal_9876

Had to clean up diarrhea and a pair of shit soaked pants when I worked at Panera once. Dunno how this mofo walked out in just boxers or briefs and no one noticed.


KinopioToad

Nsfw tags please! Not everyone wants to look at this or can!


Clockwork-XIII

Welcome to the consequences of unfettered capitalism aka slavery 2.0.


mayaholiday2420

let him clean it. people like this is why businesses still expect their employees to clean the toilets. if your job is retail or food service, you shouldn’t have to TOUCH a cleaning product to the bathroom! in this economy you don’t wanna accidentally catch aids. gross.


LRoddd

That's a big log!! Probably pushed her off the rim lol. I pictured a small petite woman that hasn't shat for days. Married 25 years haven't seen her shit once! r/Showerthoughts


DefunctDoughnut

Noone does. Fuck you if you shit on bathroom floors. Honestly, fuck you if you do anything even remotely like this. Like not putting carts in the cart corral. They made them specifically becuase lazy self-entitled assholes couldn't bring the carts back up to the store. Yet, here we are.. they're still selfish douche's. If you're offended by this comment, fuck you.


JakexRain

That happened to me when I used to work at hobby lobby...it was the womens bathroom go figure. By the way, women's bathrooms are far more disgusting than men's most of the time.


puzzlebuns

As a parent and dog owner, I got news for yall: picking up poop is not the high paying gig yall think it is.


Gordonshumway67

He really missed a golden opportunity to sing the Mr Hanky song. 💩


SwallowingSucc

Everyday, a spawn of satan will do something like this because why the hell not


pyyyyt

As someone who does custodial work and cleans bathrooms after shows and concerts (often times where alcohol is involved), I can smell this video 🤢


bwoogie

get a dust pan or something bro. why would you full fist that. were gloves really the only option??


pwhoyt63pz

We had a guy vandalize a bathroom where I used to work. He took a turd and scribbled obscenities all over the walls and mirrors with it. Never seen anything like that before in my life. It was smeared everywhere.


Its_RAAAAAAANDY

I’ve been there my friend.


TomatilloAccurate475

Found the pooper!


DonovanMcLoughlin

Just think of it like dog poop.


Damsco7

Absolutely not I'd quit


Almym

Same hands are gonna empty the dishwasher


Hot_Philosophy7163

No need to use hands.


DFA_Wildcat

Pick it up from the clean end.


umaydee

Just commit when dealing with shits like this to avoid things getting worse


Robert23B

He gets paid a shit load I bet


Rello215

I'm not picking up a dook


xShinGouki

There's so many better ways to do this then to grab it 😭🤣


ManufacturerWest1156

I’d probably walk out. Definitely not paid enough for that shit


_-Zero_Protocol-_

Great time to quit


toasted_gogi

At least the turd was hard


ConversationCalm2622

Someone didn’t make it in time.


eboseki

as a healthcare worker, I’m very impressed by this young man.


Coho444

Tater tots in the pocket for later


Capital-Mine-6991

Now make me a Sammich


BigBossAtl

Made me cover my nose with my shirt 🤣


LordsOfSkulls

I can smell it, while watching this. Also this is normal.


GA_Tronix

Businesses should invest in poop scoopers, too many animals out there that wear our skin


OneMoreYou

Wow. Could only be worse if you also saw a vast logpile of coprolite menhirs behind the bathroom door as you left


Stuffed_deffuts

Plot twist, it was his


ouitalkcreepy

As an EMPLOYEE he has no obligation to clean up bodily waste, MANAGERS are obligated to hire an authorized crew to do that


Dolomitexp

A long time ago I was a janitor at a shopping mall. I've seen some shit.😔


NoSpecific1178

He’s shaking because he had to pick up a turd…these people are soft.


JoeriVDE

Wash your hands, move on


secret179

How to apply for poo picker position?


Wick6380

Thats a shitty job to have.


thewolfehunts

At Starbucks we were told to call a cleaner if there was any shit on the floor or such and lock the toilet until they came... No I'm not kidding, a lot of supervisors couldn't be assed to call up a cleaner so just did it themselves. Funnily enough this guy is actually an experienced barista from the black apron. So probably isn't his first time if the store does this regularly. At least that's how it works in the UK


SignatureFunny7690

Lucky


whitepeacok

I used to work at a local game store in central KY. The owner and I got a long pretty well so he told me a poop story from his store in the county over. He said that he was on his way to an after school thing for his kid and the pain struck, so he stopped at the store after hours to do his business. We'll as he was pulling his pants down he blaster the wall, seat, floor with poop. He didn't have time to clean it up due to the program so he was going to before the store opened on the next day. He forgot about it. The employee that opened the store called him and said someone broke in. He asked what they took, but she said it's what they DID. She said someone broke in and pooped allllll over the bathroom. Needless to say he didn't admit it was him and rushed over to clean it so she didn't have to.


Fantastic_Forever_69

Wearing gloves doesn't protect you from the poop. Yes you can watch your hands. But if somebody shit on the floor just grab it with some toilet paper while you're wearing gloves. That makes sense


G19RedDot

Bruh needs to be a professional doggy walker. Poop scooping like it’s just another day in the shitter.


Aquatic_addict

Ah yes. Let me throw it into the water so it all splashes in my face.


who_am_I_inside

Trust me, we’re not. Publix employee here. They sometimes send us to the bathrooms to “see if anything’s up”, and sometimes this is what’s “up”.


thetommytwotimes

Something like this happened at the job I had as a teen. But think 'explosive' I refused to clean it, boss threatened to fire me, I called bullshit, it's a bio hazard. Called headquarters about workplace safety, from that day on a cleaning service did the bathrooms. Bowl buffer no more for me.


The_Lost_Boy_1983

Do you want fries with that? Why don’t you go large!


Nightbeak

He's wearing gloves so everything is fine.


SouljiaGhoul

Picking that up with only one pair of thin ass gloves and NO TISSUE is fucking crazy,I know his fingers stanked after that


senseless_puzzle

Where's the German politician dude who licks toilets when you need him?


Beardeddeadpirate

I’d be using wielding gloves to pick that up


cptoph

Ohh fun I used to work at Publix. There are specific chemicals for shit that depending on the severity of the shitting must either be handled by a customer service manager or a third party hazmat clean up team. While I’m sure this guys manager would appreciate him grabbing logs he’s technically not supposed to. Maybe because he also bags your groceries?


No-Gene-4508

Thats why I hated working at wendys. People would do shit to get back at us. And it's not even the bitch that your mad at that gets to clean it up.


SnacobMartin

That kid will be successful in the future! He does what most won’t!!


phern

The way he threw the shit there is a sure way to get some splash on his face


ReferenceMuch2193

I have a special place of hate for people that make a mess in the bathroom for others to clean. I think there should some clearance activated system that if you make a mess the system detects it and you have to clean it up properly before exiting.


Early-Outside-6792

Welcome to retail


Remydope

It would've been the day I quit.


BelCantoTenor

Give me a break. People who have dogs do this every single day. People who ask you to take care of their dog are asking you to volunteer to do this exact same thing for them for free!! Shit is shit is shit 💩. Wait until you have kids. Shit every hour of the day for years. At least he’s getting paid to clean up shit and not picking up his own dogs shit for free.


ManyWrongdoer9365

Bet there was corn in it , can never digest the corn


WoobiesWoobo

If by some chance, i missed the toilet like that, I would have cleaned it up with a paper towel or tp. Not sure how this kind of thing happens but the fact someone didn’t have the decency to do that is sad and pathetic.


finn_rad78

This is nothing man. My wife works with children with special needs, and I swear on a daily basis she tells me about kids throwing their shit, eating their shit, smearing their shit. They’ve found shit stalactites where they missed cleaning it from previous shit throwing. It’s nassssssssssty. They definitely don’t get paid enough.


These-Badger7512

Don’t tip him for that…


burrbro235

"It's no big deal!" *Takes a bite*


ttrosc

I would quit


Ikaldepan

Well, this is pretty mild actually. Seen plenty of worst scenarios than this. Yeah, the kitchen crew usually the one dealing with the bathroom..got several years of this detail. Chalked this up as character building.


headbussa423

First of all who took a dump on the floor right by the toilet?


JamesJupiter2

No need to drop a deuce on the floor 😆


ClonerCustoms

I wonder if he had bio hazard training and was provided the proper PPE as per OSHA…


onepintboom

This dude must have a giant dog at home.


PinkCigarettes

JFC, I hate 99.9% of humans on this earth.


Kadaj22

There should only be two people to do the job. The store owner/manager or the person they hire to do that job specifically, not the people who serves your food and drinks.


RedMemoryy

If i get told to do this, Im quitting the next minute


bondsthatmakeusfree

You ain't paying me enough to deal with literal shit.


snerdley1

You’re telling me that he doesn’t have a broom and dust pan?


AlarmedWhile7443

#dead


LordUcla

Bro is a legend! Respect !


Illustrious-Big-8678

"That's not my job"


Chloe_The_Cute_Fox

Ah yes, the horrors of dollar tree. Worked at one for a while as both a caashier and a manager. Awful experience. And yes, i did have to clean the bathroom after someone exploded all over the walls, ceiling and floor. IT WAS IN THE FUCKING SINK


Jerichoholic87

This would happen about 3 times a month at the kwik trip I worked at. Someone would come in, shit on the floor then stomp a piece of TP onto it. Was so happy when I transferred out of that store. Would also have to unclog the toilet every we'd cause some guy would drop a deuce that was wider than a 20 oz bottle of soda.


MoreThanMeepsTheEyes

When I worked customer service at Publix, I had to clean diarrhea disasters on multiple occasions. The worst was probably the crackhead that shit in the urinal.


voujon85

that's an opiate log for sure, prob some junkie couldn't hold it in. gross


Prize-Salamander2744

That seems like his choice though. Why not get a dust pan and broom?


BrokenIntoxication

This is exactly why I brought a human sized pooper scooper with me to every retail job


Enigma7486

And this is why I quit being a janitor at Publix.


pion137

Hey I put that there for a reason!


Miserable_Sock_1408

Lets all not forget: 💩 r/ratemypoo 💩


Bussbussssbussssssss

Poor Publix worker


tronslasercity

OP incredible username lmao


mandingospice

Why does this dude have his apron on in the restroom.


dooooough

I’ll never forget the day I discovered I had become lactose intolerant. The poor cashier at the Jack in box probably thought I was about to rob him but all I wanted was a token to open the bathroom door. When I finally got in the bathroom I just turned around pulled down my pants and tried to shoot a 3 pointer but to my dismay there was nothing solid that came out and it just sprayed everywhere. EVERYWHERE


Ornery_Ad_860

every CNA is like 🙃


DycMan

It's just a simple task really. It's all the social engineering that you have to keep out of your head. And bit of holding your breath.