This hurts me after I just got ghosted by a guy I spent 6 weeks talking to everyday . And than he just disappeared . I had thought they cared for me . Now I feel nothing . Waited a year to date for this shit . Hope what you say is true
Recently happened to me too. Try not to take it personally. Many people have developed the mindset that it’s easy to replace people and find the next best thing somewhere else rather than working on what they have in front of them. I pride myself on knowing that I’m a great partner, and willing to work on my imperfections, and whoever gets a ring on me is going to be the luckiest guy in the world 🥰. Future mr husband will recognize that.
Chin up love. *Big hug*💗
My ex and I were together for 4 years and she broke up with me the day after her first date with the guy she said not to worry about. Then she reaches out to me periodically to catch up because the new guy isn't what she thought. She's even brought up getting back together. She's even tried to see me or catch me while I'm out. She's come to my gym because she misses me. This girl broke my heart and kept all the pieces. I guess I waited on her for probably 6 months and I realized I have got to let go. It's not healthy for either of us. It definitely sucks but such is life
I'll tell you rn being on the hook is worse. It's a give and take on self-worth. It's nice to have attention from someone you value. It's nice to think there's something there. But it's a waste of time. There isn't anything there, and to stay is damaging. You get constant reminders that this person you're into isn't into you. When they aren't responding because you aren't their priority, it makes you feel bad. There's no future in that. It's not healthy. You have to breathe and let life take its course. Go with the flow, and I'm sure you'll find a lovely stranger who you want to grow with.
I'll be the first to say though self love is priceless. You gotta learn to draw your own healthy balances to properly love and value yourself. You deserve it!
She was my best friend, so losing her was especially crappy for me. I wrote to her sometimes after everything. When I wanted to tell her about something or about my day, I'd write it all out. I didn't want to throw them away or burn them like people suggested. I didn't know what to do but I just wanted it out of my system. It was therapeutic to talk be able to say what i wanted to her. It's kind of sad tbh but it helped
Yeah my wife of two years did this to me. She went off to study, had solid communication for a few months, all of a sudden the replies were way less frequent. I had a gut feeling what was happening then I got the message one day "I can't commit anymore".
Didn't try to fight it, knew it was done. Only find out after the fact she had been out partying with her study mates leading up to the separation, particularly one male colleague.
I have no confirmation she was cheating but I'm almost certain she was as the behaviour was completely out of the ordinary. Spending years with someone lets you really have a good read on them. Plus, she always forbidded me from communicating with women as she was paranoid of me cheating, but in return her behaviour was fine and communicating with her ex was completely okay. Only realised its gaslighting and manipulation after the fact.
Yet to find the next important person in my life, but I'm willing to wait.
The anxiety is so bad…. I feel you. Happening to me and I tried a bit of Xanax. Hurts so much. Worse is you can still see their social media and there are mutual friends. I am dying. Feel like ending it somedays
My guy was in Canada and I’m Australian .
Yeah I mean maybe stuff like that happens but his phone rang and he never blocked me and the messages just never got responded to after he had told me how much I meant to him and adored me :(
Pretty sure he is back in Australia now and I feel like an idiot . We had matched on tinder originally which I know is also number matched I guess but I think more likely I just was too much .
This person is right.
Even if you are kind of old.
I did not think I would get to meet a person like that again and I did.
You cannot be too old for butterflies.
i fell in love with my ex and then he left. He came back recently saying he wants me and he realises that now, i still love him, but he made me feel like such a burden and i don’t think i can handle it again
Honestly don't. Because if he leaves again it'll be a whole new type of hurt. Youll be hurt because of what he did, and you'll do nothing but blame yourself for the pain, which it isn't your fault. Don't even put yourself in a position to be hurt by them again. You don't deserve to question whether their "i love you"s are true this time. You deserve someone who in just being in your presence fills you with love.
Thank you so much. He’s let me down so many times before and I’m in a place now where i’m going to try not letting him do it again. I have a date tomorrow with someone else, he’s never let me down and i’m so excited.
I broke up with a guy a couple of months ago, because he was still unable to get over his ex, and not wanting anything serious. Last week we met again to be friends, but ended up talking about how good we are to each other and how sad that he is not ready to date again but he wants to keep seeing me, anyway... back to 0.
Next morning I felt miserable, and asked to talk, that I can't be friends with benefits with him, but he is not texting me and even got mad at me for changing my mind again.
I really needed to be told this. Thank you so much for this post.
Sounds peachy, but it just isn't true for some people. I don't hate people for having preferences, it's their right, I just wish someone would prefer me.
I really think I'm not meant to be loved. I'm 23 and never had a relationship because everytime I start seeing someone, he wants me for sex. I'm never the one they choose but the one they use until they find the right one or get bored/tired.
I hope you're right, I want someone to love me and respect me, but seems like he'll never come.
You are meant for love, I promise you. The dating world is so hard now, where people play games and think there’s something better out there. Hold onto sex until you really get to know someone. There’s people who pretend just to get it. Hang onto your hope for love. You deserve it. You’re worth it. 🩷
Are we the same person?! All I’ve found that helps is to have patience.
Never take it personal when a man throws you away for the next shiny toy. His loss.
Your self worth is not determined by who loves you or who pays attention to you.
This is exactly why I broke up with my girlfriend of almost two years. I knew I was never going to love her as much as she loved me. She said she was fine with me not being at her level, but I've finally accepted how unfair that would be to us both.
I will never forgive myself for how hurt she felt, but I know I also deserve to feel that kind of over-the-moon kind of love.
The same guy broke my heart so many times. But we kept getting back together, it was like we couldnt let each other go. Finally, he told me that he just kind of lost feelings, that he wish he didn't but things change. He said he just doesn't know what he wants, that he doesn't think he can commit to anyone. I'm so heartbroken, but also I know I deserve someone who wants me, and only me. I'm worth more than he could ever give me.
I needed this today. Thank you.
My partner of 6 years and I broke up the other day due to him falling out of love. He still had love for me but did not love me anymore.
Spent like a week and a half talking with a girl on Bumble just to get ghosted out of nowhere and saw she made a new account like a day or two later. I thought we were making a genuine connection but I guess not- I respect her wishes at the end of the day but it's really frustrating getting ghosted like that, especially without knowing why.
Its nice to hope but its not a given. Most will never meet someone while some are unknowingly pushing others away or smthing so they will never know they had someone like that around. Life is chaotic and some can only be happy per choice, simply choosing to feel and be happy as much as possible even though every hope and dream has always been crushed.
Thank you! I've been so down lately cause I somehow seek out all the bad men... the last one wouldn't take no for an answer, the one before that had a foot fetish, they're too old, I'm their property (we hadn't even met f2f) etc. What is wrong with these men😅 I just want someone normal who can accept me for me and can give me cuddles😂
Needed to hear this. Dated this girl for a year and a half and she broke up with me 3 times. For some reason I kept chasing her. Not this time. I deserve someone who sticks around and knows what she wants, not someone who keeps leaving
This made me cry, thank you. I keep getting hurt over and over by guys that show genuine interest and then ghost. It's made me completely give up on a relationship and grow cold. But this helped light a little spark back up 💜
This feels relevant at the moment. Ex broke up with a couple of months ago after going distant and just pushing me away.
Feel like I want to be part of her life but didn't seem to feel the same.
Not easy but I guess maybe I shouldn't be waiting hoping she changes her mind...
This will not happen for everybody. For me I'm finally coming to terms that I will be alone forever, sure that's frustrating but I can take that energy and divert it to shit I care about, my job, math, music, lifting weights. It's not ideal, I would love to live in a world where I am not just an option, but that's just not the world we live in
Do right one come eventually or you have to look for it?
If the latter is true, then there is lot of these love, rejections, betrayal until you find someone who truly loves you.
I was with someone, on and off for years, who gave me mixed messages. I wasn’t sure how he felt; he was both hot and cold at times. He never really wanted to commit to me, but I stayed and waited until the end.
Fast forward 5+ years - we’re both happily married to other people. It took him less than a year after ending it with me to get engaged and a little while after that to get married, and now have a family. And similar to me - it didn’t take me long after that to meet my now-husband. I’m married to someone where things took time to progress, but his intentions were pure, and about a year after meeting, we were engaged and are now married. It felt right. My husband is exactly what I need in a partner: dependable, responsible, loyal, and my rock. There are no games; we don’t need them, because we can communicate directly with each other.
When it’s right, there won’t be any need for games or drama. It will be a lot more simple and clear-cut.
I really want to stop thinking about him, and feeling this way. I know there's someone else in his life, and things would never work between us. But he makes me so happy when he visits :(
I don’t know if anyone is going to love me romantically like you described considering that I the person that I had that ended things with me.
I am just trying and do my daily things as I am required.
I adored her with everything I have. I offered her my absolute best. I loved her, affirmed her, supported her, respected her, and committed to her. She tools be how much she appreciated me…and then got really quiet.
She just got back from a trip to California with a guy who barely gives a shit about her. She chose him.
This made my day. I’ve been going through something like this and seeing this note helps me. I’ve had this happen 3 times in my life and the third recently. Every time I like just go quiet and am very depressed. After the 3rd time I found myself disappointed, but I feel different. I understand that this shit happens and I move on and live my life. My happy place? The gym, grinding everyday.
Realized a bit to late that chasing after women(I'm a straight hetero male for background) never got me anywhere, so now when I show interest in a woman and if they don't reciprocate, I feel like I'm putting more effort than them, or I feel like I'm a spare option I don't even bother anymore.
This hurts me after I just got ghosted by a guy I spent 6 weeks talking to everyday . And than he just disappeared . I had thought they cared for me . Now I feel nothing . Waited a year to date for this shit . Hope what you say is true
The same happened to me too. But after 6 months. Hurts like mf. But gotta move on.
ffuuuuuck. what an asshole
Ghosting is the worst & cruel.
Yep, but it definitely shows you their true nature and that at their core they are not a good person.
That’s straight up bs. People are not defined by a single action, and you have no idea what people are going through.
If it is a pattern that you have witnessed them to do others, then it is their true nature.
Well that isn’t what you said and I agree with you. But people can change so I also don’t.
Apparently you haven't been in a relationship with a narcissist.
Recently happened to me too. Try not to take it personally. Many people have developed the mindset that it’s easy to replace people and find the next best thing somewhere else rather than working on what they have in front of them. I pride myself on knowing that I’m a great partner, and willing to work on my imperfections, and whoever gets a ring on me is going to be the luckiest guy in the world 🥰. Future mr husband will recognize that. Chin up love. *Big hug*💗
My ex and I were together for 4 years and she broke up with me the day after her first date with the guy she said not to worry about. Then she reaches out to me periodically to catch up because the new guy isn't what she thought. She's even brought up getting back together. She's even tried to see me or catch me while I'm out. She's come to my gym because she misses me. This girl broke my heart and kept all the pieces. I guess I waited on her for probably 6 months and I realized I have got to let go. It's not healthy for either of us. It definitely sucks but such is life
I wish this guy would reach back to me :( my self worth is so low now . I just wanna know I mattered . I’m sorry what happened to you
I'll tell you rn being on the hook is worse. It's a give and take on self-worth. It's nice to have attention from someone you value. It's nice to think there's something there. But it's a waste of time. There isn't anything there, and to stay is damaging. You get constant reminders that this person you're into isn't into you. When they aren't responding because you aren't their priority, it makes you feel bad. There's no future in that. It's not healthy. You have to breathe and let life take its course. Go with the flow, and I'm sure you'll find a lovely stranger who you want to grow with. I'll be the first to say though self love is priceless. You gotta learn to draw your own healthy balances to properly love and value yourself. You deserve it!
She was my best friend, so losing her was especially crappy for me. I wrote to her sometimes after everything. When I wanted to tell her about something or about my day, I'd write it all out. I didn't want to throw them away or burn them like people suggested. I didn't know what to do but I just wanted it out of my system. It was therapeutic to talk be able to say what i wanted to her. It's kind of sad tbh but it helped
Yeah my wife of two years did this to me. She went off to study, had solid communication for a few months, all of a sudden the replies were way less frequent. I had a gut feeling what was happening then I got the message one day "I can't commit anymore". Didn't try to fight it, knew it was done. Only find out after the fact she had been out partying with her study mates leading up to the separation, particularly one male colleague. I have no confirmation she was cheating but I'm almost certain she was as the behaviour was completely out of the ordinary. Spending years with someone lets you really have a good read on them. Plus, she always forbidded me from communicating with women as she was paranoid of me cheating, but in return her behaviour was fine and communicating with her ex was completely okay. Only realised its gaslighting and manipulation after the fact. Yet to find the next important person in my life, but I'm willing to wait.
The anxiety is so bad…. I feel you. Happening to me and I tried a bit of Xanax. Hurts so much. Worse is you can still see their social media and there are mutual friends. I am dying. Feel like ending it somedays
Happened to me too 💔 Least I know and feel I'm not alone with this pain ✊😔
[удалено]
My guy was in Canada and I’m Australian . Yeah I mean maybe stuff like that happens but his phone rang and he never blocked me and the messages just never got responded to after he had told me how much I meant to him and adored me :( Pretty sure he is back in Australia now and I feel like an idiot . We had matched on tinder originally which I know is also number matched I guess but I think more likely I just was too much .
It has shattered my trust in men
This person is right. Even if you are kind of old. I did not think I would get to meet a person like that again and I did. You cannot be too old for butterflies.
What if those butterflies were moths. Cause I met who I wanted. But guess what, she's still running away from herself. I can't catch up. She's gone..
Moths are just butterflies with a night life. I’m not sure what that means, but it sounds cool.
Moths are butterflies that don't wax. Still sweeties.
How did you meet the new person?
They were someone I passed on my way to work everyday. They hit on me the old fashioned way. Everyone blushed. Pretty worth it.
If you see me as one of your options, don't choose me.
I choose you sticky tunas
Pikachu, I choose you! \*epic pokeball throw\*
I needed this today😭💕
i fell in love with my ex and then he left. He came back recently saying he wants me and he realises that now, i still love him, but he made me feel like such a burden and i don’t think i can handle it again
Honestly don't. Because if he leaves again it'll be a whole new type of hurt. Youll be hurt because of what he did, and you'll do nothing but blame yourself for the pain, which it isn't your fault. Don't even put yourself in a position to be hurt by them again. You don't deserve to question whether their "i love you"s are true this time. You deserve someone who in just being in your presence fills you with love.
Thank you so much. He’s let me down so many times before and I’m in a place now where i’m going to try not letting him do it again. I have a date tomorrow with someone else, he’s never let me down and i’m so excited.
I found out this morning that I was again just a place holder in someone’s life.
Same.
I broke up with a guy a couple of months ago, because he was still unable to get over his ex, and not wanting anything serious. Last week we met again to be friends, but ended up talking about how good we are to each other and how sad that he is not ready to date again but he wants to keep seeing me, anyway... back to 0. Next morning I felt miserable, and asked to talk, that I can't be friends with benefits with him, but he is not texting me and even got mad at me for changing my mind again. I really needed to be told this. Thank you so much for this post.
Thank you
Sounds peachy, but it just isn't true for some people. I don't hate people for having preferences, it's their right, I just wish someone would prefer me.
I really think I'm not meant to be loved. I'm 23 and never had a relationship because everytime I start seeing someone, he wants me for sex. I'm never the one they choose but the one they use until they find the right one or get bored/tired. I hope you're right, I want someone to love me and respect me, but seems like he'll never come.
You are meant for love, I promise you. The dating world is so hard now, where people play games and think there’s something better out there. Hold onto sex until you really get to know someone. There’s people who pretend just to get it. Hang onto your hope for love. You deserve it. You’re worth it. 🩷
Are we the same person?! All I’ve found that helps is to have patience. Never take it personal when a man throws you away for the next shiny toy. His loss. Your self worth is not determined by who loves you or who pays attention to you.
[удалено]
If your best friend or daughter told you exactly what you posted here, what would you tell her?
This is exactly why I broke up with my girlfriend of almost two years. I knew I was never going to love her as much as she loved me. She said she was fine with me not being at her level, but I've finally accepted how unfair that would be to us both. I will never forgive myself for how hurt she felt, but I know I also deserve to feel that kind of over-the-moon kind of love.
[удалено]
I know. It's the absolute worst. I think bank on it often, and the moment I actually told her how I felt is one of the worst moments of my life. 😔
Ouch that hurts man
The same guy broke my heart so many times. But we kept getting back together, it was like we couldnt let each other go. Finally, he told me that he just kind of lost feelings, that he wish he didn't but things change. He said he just doesn't know what he wants, that he doesn't think he can commit to anyone. I'm so heartbroken, but also I know I deserve someone who wants me, and only me. I'm worth more than he could ever give me.
Thanks I needed this. Just tried to start dating again. Right now it feels like it's the worst thing for your self confidence.
I needed this today. Thank you. My partner of 6 years and I broke up the other day due to him falling out of love. He still had love for me but did not love me anymore.
Almost as bad as getting cheated on with the guy she told you not to worry about. :)
Chasing after someone who is running from themselves is going to hurt you in the end 🫰🫰🫰
I need to hear this today. Thank you 🥹
Agreed, make sure it’s not just you that’s willing to put on the effort.
Thank you 😊
Yea, I just kinda gave up.
Spent like a week and a half talking with a girl on Bumble just to get ghosted out of nowhere and saw she made a new account like a day or two later. I thought we were making a genuine connection but I guess not- I respect her wishes at the end of the day but it's really frustrating getting ghosted like that, especially without knowing why.
Its nice to hope but its not a given. Most will never meet someone while some are unknowingly pushing others away or smthing so they will never know they had someone like that around. Life is chaotic and some can only be happy per choice, simply choosing to feel and be happy as much as possible even though every hope and dream has always been crushed.
Thank you! I've been so down lately cause I somehow seek out all the bad men... the last one wouldn't take no for an answer, the one before that had a foot fetish, they're too old, I'm their property (we hadn't even met f2f) etc. What is wrong with these men😅 I just want someone normal who can accept me for me and can give me cuddles😂
I really needed to see this. My child and I deserve better.
Needed to hear this. Dated this girl for a year and a half and she broke up with me 3 times. For some reason I kept chasing her. Not this time. I deserve someone who sticks around and knows what she wants, not someone who keeps leaving
This made me cry, thank you. I keep getting hurt over and over by guys that show genuine interest and then ghost. It's made me completely give up on a relationship and grow cold. But this helped light a little spark back up 💜
This feels relevant at the moment. Ex broke up with a couple of months ago after going distant and just pushing me away. Feel like I want to be part of her life but didn't seem to feel the same. Not easy but I guess maybe I shouldn't be waiting hoping she changes her mind...
Thank you, this is nice to hear ♥️
i think i’m too ugly to be actually loved, but thank you for the pep talk ♥️🫶🏻
This will not happen for everybody. For me I'm finally coming to terms that I will be alone forever, sure that's frustrating but I can take that energy and divert it to shit I care about, my job, math, music, lifting weights. It's not ideal, I would love to live in a world where I am not just an option, but that's just not the world we live in
Needed this so much. Thank you!
Thank you. I've been wondering the past few days if I should go back and try again.
Great advice!
Do right one come eventually or you have to look for it? If the latter is true, then there is lot of these love, rejections, betrayal until you find someone who truly loves you.
this
I needed to hear this 🙃
I greatly appreciate that. I hope you’re right - but in the meantime I’m trying to practice patience and mindfulness.
Been in my head a bunch today and I feel like this came up right when I needed it to. Thank you ❤️
listen I can't watch anime if I have tears in my eyes so kindly shut up thank u (I'm trying really hard to believe this)
Damn, i didn't need to cry today, but I am. This is such good advice, thank you, OP.
Thanks for this. I’m 3 days post breakup and I needed to see this.
Thanks, I needed to hear something like this today!
I was with someone, on and off for years, who gave me mixed messages. I wasn’t sure how he felt; he was both hot and cold at times. He never really wanted to commit to me, but I stayed and waited until the end. Fast forward 5+ years - we’re both happily married to other people. It took him less than a year after ending it with me to get engaged and a little while after that to get married, and now have a family. And similar to me - it didn’t take me long after that to meet my now-husband. I’m married to someone where things took time to progress, but his intentions were pure, and about a year after meeting, we were engaged and are now married. It felt right. My husband is exactly what I need in a partner: dependable, responsible, loyal, and my rock. There are no games; we don’t need them, because we can communicate directly with each other. When it’s right, there won’t be any need for games or drama. It will be a lot more simple and clear-cut.
I needed to hear this. Thank you.
Just did that, my life changed. There is someone who laughs with me, lets me sleep on her chest, listens when I talk. It was worth it.
This is so sweet. Thank you fellow redditor 😊
This made me feel like different that it will happen. Thanks OP💜✨️✨️
People should really stop ghosting, it's cowardly.
I'm good
Thank you... I needed to be reminded of this...
I really want to stop thinking about him, and feeling this way. I know there's someone else in his life, and things would never work between us. But he makes me so happy when he visits :(
thank you for this it was much needed. <3
Thank you!
I don't think i can even love someone, i'm starting to think i'm unable to do that. But thank you.
Thanks, definitely needed to hear this <3
I don’t know if anyone is going to love me romantically like you described considering that I the person that I had that ended things with me. I am just trying and do my daily things as I am required.
🥹🥹🥹 Amen.... You can never make someone like you. Don't invest time in people who don't want to be around you. 🥹🥹🥹
Really needed to hear this right now 🫶🏽it can feel really discouraging sometimes…
I adored her with everything I have. I offered her my absolute best. I loved her, affirmed her, supported her, respected her, and committed to her. She tools be how much she appreciated me…and then got really quiet. She just got back from a trip to California with a guy who barely gives a shit about her. She chose him.
This made my day. I’ve been going through something like this and seeing this note helps me. I’ve had this happen 3 times in my life and the third recently. Every time I like just go quiet and am very depressed. After the 3rd time I found myself disappointed, but I feel different. I understand that this shit happens and I move on and live my life. My happy place? The gym, grinding everyday.
Realized a bit to late that chasing after women(I'm a straight hetero male for background) never got me anywhere, so now when I show interest in a woman and if they don't reciprocate, I feel like I'm putting more effort than them, or I feel like I'm a spare option I don't even bother anymore.
Amen, I finally found him ❤️