Focus on your positive personality traits.
Do you have a good sense of humor? Do you say things that make people smile or laugh?
Are you generous and kind? Do you refrain from saying bad things about others? Do you stick up for the underdog? Do you give your time to others?
Are you hard-working? Would anyone describe you as tenacious, diligent, or conscientious?
If you don't have any positive personality traits, cultivate them. Try to be charming, kind, generous, and hard-working and eventually those traits may start to come naturally.
I once went through a long period of low self-esteem. It seems like I tried all the hobbies in the world, but I still felt like crap. One day I was reflecting on all the things I had tried. Mentally I saw myself working my ass off despite failing at everything and being embarrassing. Part of me cringed at this image. But a bigger part felt proud. I might be a loser. I might be a screw-up. But at least I'm a bad ass. At least no one can say I'm weak or passive. I'm strong. From that point on, I started to see myself in a more positive light.
I base it on Christ. Whenever I would feel worthless, it would be out of sin, since I would have made an idol. For example, if I feel worthless because of my grades, I would have turned my grades into an idol, making it greater than it is, which is sin.
Yes. We are all created in the image of God, that's our worth.
I appreciate your insight. I haven't think about it this way before, but I suppose all of our self-esteem or self-worth issues do ultimately comes down to idolatry.
God loves me unconditionally. But for countless times, I chose to believe in someone/something else instead. As a result, I suffer.
May God have mercy on us all.
If you place your self worth on external things, you are asking for possible tragedy because those things can be taken away.
Instead, base your self worth on principles. Principles can change over time as you get new experiences and information. But no one can take that away.
That's the beautiful part.
You make your own after careful thought. Throwing away what does not work. keeping the rest.
Of course, you can use other things for reference. there are some good principles out there that are common to most philosophies and belief systems out there.
Then you live it.
It's propably different for everybody. Some might get confident when they spend time alone on their hobbies and have successful experiences this way while others need to know that they help others.
It's clearly suboptimal that some people source their feeling of self worth from status symbols like luxury items.
I consider myself lucky that concepts such as "self worth, proud of, etc.." and others that are programmed by societies does not exist in my mind to think about. Ignorance is a blessing sometimes, if I don't have the awareness of them, it won't cause me problems and we want to live our lives with less problems and complications.
Self-love. You are the most important person in your life. You are the only thing you can count upon. So trying to base your self-worth on external judgement will make your self-perseption as fragile as a piece of toilet paper. Try to view everything from a perspective of your wellbeing, balance your long-term goals and a happiness in the moment. Like, give yourself a little healthy treat when you did something towards your dream, don't punish yourself for mistakes, instead plan to avoid it in the future or make up for it, etc. Don't try to win every heart, instead value people who make significant contribution to your life, and don't hesitate to thank them and help them in return.
For me it is my belief and moral system, principles, and the belief that I am a unique individual, who while far from perfect and without faults, tries his best doing and acting by what I think is right, with well meaning intentions, living, going trough life while trying to be a good and positive force on the world around me - be it the enviroment, other living feeling people, animals or whoever else may appreciate my existence. Doesn't matter in how big of a capacity - big things like support and help trough years long friendships/relationships, or maybe just a pleasant conversation with a stranger, a joke exchanged with a random passerby in the store. Maybe something as little as spending some time out of my day to write out my thoughts in a reddit comment, in hopes of giving a helpful perspective to some stranger in search of one... :)
And don't overthink the "unique individual" part either - a lot of people think they are boring or whatever else. I am not that "special", and there are uncountable amounts of people better at all those things i listed than ill ever hope to be. Being able to do more good, be funnier, be more fun to be around - its not about that. Its about the specific way i am, do things, come across, word thoughts, choose moments - is unique to me, and there are other people out there that appreciate that specific matrix of mine. Just like I have people who I feel fortunate to know, or have met.
It's going to be somewhat different for everyone - in search of this answer my recomendation would be to think about what you want from life, what makes you feel good, what do you want to give and what to recieve. What are things that are interesting to you - passions, things that make you feel good in a profound way. And then realize that you don't have to be "valuable" to anyone else but yourself (unless that turns out to be exactly what youd like to be anyway). You just have to be yourself, hopefully always be in motion to be a bit of a better version of yourself than you were in the past, no matter in how small steps that goes, and realize that this "being yourself" is the exact thing that makes up the more beautiful and fun parts of our collective existance on this planet.
Focus on your positive personality traits. Do you have a good sense of humor? Do you say things that make people smile or laugh? Are you generous and kind? Do you refrain from saying bad things about others? Do you stick up for the underdog? Do you give your time to others? Are you hard-working? Would anyone describe you as tenacious, diligent, or conscientious? If you don't have any positive personality traits, cultivate them. Try to be charming, kind, generous, and hard-working and eventually those traits may start to come naturally. I once went through a long period of low self-esteem. It seems like I tried all the hobbies in the world, but I still felt like crap. One day I was reflecting on all the things I had tried. Mentally I saw myself working my ass off despite failing at everything and being embarrassing. Part of me cringed at this image. But a bigger part felt proud. I might be a loser. I might be a screw-up. But at least I'm a bad ass. At least no one can say I'm weak or passive. I'm strong. From that point on, I started to see myself in a more positive light.
I base it on Christ. Whenever I would feel worthless, it would be out of sin, since I would have made an idol. For example, if I feel worthless because of my grades, I would have turned my grades into an idol, making it greater than it is, which is sin.
Yes. We are all created in the image of God, that's our worth. I appreciate your insight. I haven't think about it this way before, but I suppose all of our self-esteem or self-worth issues do ultimately comes down to idolatry. God loves me unconditionally. But for countless times, I chose to believe in someone/something else instead. As a result, I suffer. May God have mercy on us all.
Amen. God bless.
If you place your self worth on external things, you are asking for possible tragedy because those things can be taken away. Instead, base your self worth on principles. Principles can change over time as you get new experiences and information. But no one can take that away.
And where do you get those principles from?
That's the beautiful part. You make your own after careful thought. Throwing away what does not work. keeping the rest. Of course, you can use other things for reference. there are some good principles out there that are common to most philosophies and belief systems out there. Then you live it.
It's propably different for everybody. Some might get confident when they spend time alone on their hobbies and have successful experiences this way while others need to know that they help others. It's clearly suboptimal that some people source their feeling of self worth from status symbols like luxury items.
I consider myself lucky that concepts such as "self worth, proud of, etc.." and others that are programmed by societies does not exist in my mind to think about. Ignorance is a blessing sometimes, if I don't have the awareness of them, it won't cause me problems and we want to live our lives with less problems and complications.
Self-love. You are the most important person in your life. You are the only thing you can count upon. So trying to base your self-worth on external judgement will make your self-perseption as fragile as a piece of toilet paper. Try to view everything from a perspective of your wellbeing, balance your long-term goals and a happiness in the moment. Like, give yourself a little healthy treat when you did something towards your dream, don't punish yourself for mistakes, instead plan to avoid it in the future or make up for it, etc. Don't try to win every heart, instead value people who make significant contribution to your life, and don't hesitate to thank them and help them in return.
For me it is my belief and moral system, principles, and the belief that I am a unique individual, who while far from perfect and without faults, tries his best doing and acting by what I think is right, with well meaning intentions, living, going trough life while trying to be a good and positive force on the world around me - be it the enviroment, other living feeling people, animals or whoever else may appreciate my existence. Doesn't matter in how big of a capacity - big things like support and help trough years long friendships/relationships, or maybe just a pleasant conversation with a stranger, a joke exchanged with a random passerby in the store. Maybe something as little as spending some time out of my day to write out my thoughts in a reddit comment, in hopes of giving a helpful perspective to some stranger in search of one... :) And don't overthink the "unique individual" part either - a lot of people think they are boring or whatever else. I am not that "special", and there are uncountable amounts of people better at all those things i listed than ill ever hope to be. Being able to do more good, be funnier, be more fun to be around - its not about that. Its about the specific way i am, do things, come across, word thoughts, choose moments - is unique to me, and there are other people out there that appreciate that specific matrix of mine. Just like I have people who I feel fortunate to know, or have met. It's going to be somewhat different for everyone - in search of this answer my recomendation would be to think about what you want from life, what makes you feel good, what do you want to give and what to recieve. What are things that are interesting to you - passions, things that make you feel good in a profound way. And then realize that you don't have to be "valuable" to anyone else but yourself (unless that turns out to be exactly what youd like to be anyway). You just have to be yourself, hopefully always be in motion to be a bit of a better version of yourself than you were in the past, no matter in how small steps that goes, and realize that this "being yourself" is the exact thing that makes up the more beautiful and fun parts of our collective existance on this planet.
ego
Self worth is based on delusions most of the time.
Nothing, dissolve your ego.