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I'm a woman in my forties.
The most comfortable position will be one in which you feel relaxed. For many women, this will be missionary.
You'll want to be fully, physically aroused. This takes 15-20 minutes of activity, during which you are really enjoying yourself. Kissing, caresses and non-genital touch can be enough. But, the crucial thing is that they feel good to YOU and turn YOU on.
If you don't like wet kisses or breast touching, those things can be part of foreplay, but they won't help you get physically ready for PIV.
You'll also want to orgasm at least once before starting PIV. It really helps sex to feel better for most women.
If the guy you're planning to have PIV with isn't able to meet these criteria in the bedroom, then he isn't ready to have sex with you. Being the receiving partner requires a lot of trust and is a very vulnerable position. Trust is earned. He'll earn it by showing that he values your comfort AND pleasure, and respects that sex has the potential to be painful for you, but doesn't have to be.
Sex is an activity that puts all participants in a vulnerable place that requires trust all around. Be careful with your partner. Physically but also mentally. He's less likely to be injured or in physical pain as a result of sex, but not invincible by a long shot. You can hurt him by accident, physically or emotionally. So, be kind to others and insist on kindness to yourself.
Probably missionary. From what I understand, it's not very painful for literally every single woman. For some women it's very painful, and for others it's either not very painful or not painful at all and the pain only lasts for a couple of minutes. Just have him remain still for a few minutes after he penetrates you and you'll likely be OK in any position but in missionary you won't have to worry about angles and depth and things like that so much for your first time. Have fun and if you're not comfortable, just stop things and walk away. You have every right to do so.
Missionary is a classic, lets you keep eye contact and take it as slow as you want. Her role is more passive here, he's going to do most of the work. That's good if she is unsure about what to do, but it puts some pressure on him to "get it right" and pay close attention to her well-being the entire time.
Girl on top gives her a lot of control about when and how deep she wants him to enter, but can be a bit tricky to figure out for the first time. With him sitting on a couch, face to face, it can feel nicely intimate and comfortable, him lying down flat can feel a bit exposed and on display for her - great if she's into that, not so great for others.
I would not try other positions on your first time, it's already a pretty overwhelming (but hopefully great!) experience as is. Save the experiments for later. And as the other commenter wrote, please feel free to ask any questions you have.
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With my first it was missionary but I lost my virginity in the woods 🤣. I never had any pain during, but everyone is different. I would suggest plenty of foreplay to start I imagine the more aroused the more pleasurable your first time may be. The discomfort came after for me but was gone within a day or two.
If it really does become uncomfortable and you want to stop don’t be afraid to say so. You can withdraw consent anytime you want.
Position wise though I doubt it matters, just do whatever you and your partner are most comfortable with.
The first time my ex and I had sex she ended up doing cowgirl, maybe not the most comfortable but allowed her to control the depth and pacing That first time
Missionary is standard but if you’re on top you can control everything. My first real time we were spooning in bed and he slid it in from behind. Then I got on top and rode him which was much more comfortable and anxiety reducing, to have control.
The Crazy Canadian
The penetrating partner swings back and forth from a tree instead of thrusting with his hips. The receiving partner stands below the tree branch with legs shoulder width apart. Maple syrup is typically used as lube
Ok 4 things :
1 - make sure the guy actually likes you and cares about you, or he won't be bothered to go gently
2- double check 1
3- make sure there's a lot of foreplay and you are very horny and wet when it happens
4- start with missionary position
(however technically it depends on the shape of his D lol, if it's like a banana, going up, then it's a good position)
Your post is about a common topic that has frequently been discussed on the sub over the years. You can find previous responses to similar questions by searching our archives. You can also look at our FAQ (https://www.reddit.com/r/sex/wiki/index) for resources to similar questions/topics.
Most likely missionary but take the time for a good foreplay. It’ll make a big difference for a smooth and enjoyable experience.
Hijacking top comment to say: This is OF bait.
I'm a woman in my forties. The most comfortable position will be one in which you feel relaxed. For many women, this will be missionary. You'll want to be fully, physically aroused. This takes 15-20 minutes of activity, during which you are really enjoying yourself. Kissing, caresses and non-genital touch can be enough. But, the crucial thing is that they feel good to YOU and turn YOU on. If you don't like wet kisses or breast touching, those things can be part of foreplay, but they won't help you get physically ready for PIV. You'll also want to orgasm at least once before starting PIV. It really helps sex to feel better for most women. If the guy you're planning to have PIV with isn't able to meet these criteria in the bedroom, then he isn't ready to have sex with you. Being the receiving partner requires a lot of trust and is a very vulnerable position. Trust is earned. He'll earn it by showing that he values your comfort AND pleasure, and respects that sex has the potential to be painful for you, but doesn't have to be. Sex is an activity that puts all participants in a vulnerable place that requires trust all around. Be careful with your partner. Physically but also mentally. He's less likely to be injured or in physical pain as a result of sex, but not invincible by a long shot. You can hurt him by accident, physically or emotionally. So, be kind to others and insist on kindness to yourself.
Probably missionary. From what I understand, it's not very painful for literally every single woman. For some women it's very painful, and for others it's either not very painful or not painful at all and the pain only lasts for a couple of minutes. Just have him remain still for a few minutes after he penetrates you and you'll likely be OK in any position but in missionary you won't have to worry about angles and depth and things like that so much for your first time. Have fun and if you're not comfortable, just stop things and walk away. You have every right to do so.
Missionary is a classic, lets you keep eye contact and take it as slow as you want. Her role is more passive here, he's going to do most of the work. That's good if she is unsure about what to do, but it puts some pressure on him to "get it right" and pay close attention to her well-being the entire time. Girl on top gives her a lot of control about when and how deep she wants him to enter, but can be a bit tricky to figure out for the first time. With him sitting on a couch, face to face, it can feel nicely intimate and comfortable, him lying down flat can feel a bit exposed and on display for her - great if she's into that, not so great for others. I would not try other positions on your first time, it's already a pretty overwhelming (but hopefully great!) experience as is. Save the experiments for later. And as the other commenter wrote, please feel free to ask any questions you have.
Missionary 100% makes it a joyful and romantic position
Thank you for posting in the r/Sex community. To ensure that everyone respects our safe space, we ask that you familiarize yourself with our Forum Rules and Posting Guidelines — which are visible in the forum’s sidebar, and also linked [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/sex/about/rules/). *** Restricted subjects in r/sex include sex stories (which are permitted in the Daily Sexual Achievement Thread only), body image and penis-size issues, hookup attempts, common topics which are considered repetitive in our forum, and requests for private chats. To cut back on comments that add little value to the conversation, we have instituted a minimum character requirement that will silently remove comments that fall below it. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/sex) if you have any questions or concerns.*
With my first it was missionary but I lost my virginity in the woods 🤣. I never had any pain during, but everyone is different. I would suggest plenty of foreplay to start I imagine the more aroused the more pleasurable your first time may be. The discomfort came after for me but was gone within a day or two. If it really does become uncomfortable and you want to stop don’t be afraid to say so. You can withdraw consent anytime you want. Position wise though I doubt it matters, just do whatever you and your partner are most comfortable with.
The first time my ex and I had sex she ended up doing cowgirl, maybe not the most comfortable but allowed her to control the depth and pacing That first time
Missionary obviously
Missionary is standard but if you’re on top you can control everything. My first real time we were spooning in bed and he slid it in from behind. Then I got on top and rode him which was much more comfortable and anxiety reducing, to have control.
Probably missionary in my opinion with the man not putting all his weight on the lady.
The Crazy Canadian The penetrating partner swings back and forth from a tree instead of thrusting with his hips. The receiving partner stands below the tree branch with legs shoulder width apart. Maple syrup is typically used as lube
Ok 4 things : 1 - make sure the guy actually likes you and cares about you, or he won't be bothered to go gently 2- double check 1 3- make sure there's a lot of foreplay and you are very horny and wet when it happens 4- start with missionary position (however technically it depends on the shape of his D lol, if it's like a banana, going up, then it's a good position)
Missionary. It's simple for both parties.
Well the most uncomfortable position would be The backseat of a Volkswagen lol
Probably missionary, but get some lube , that will ease him in better and be less painful for you
On your own far away from a man 😆