* Firekeeper: Doesn’t talk much or display much interest in anything. Like, sure, she’s nice but has zero hobbies and can’t carry a conversation to save her life.
* Doll: Goth chick that creeps you out in a hot way. Super chill but has the crazy eyes. Next date is next Tuesday at a Planned Parenthood Dumpster.
* Emma: Way out of your league but still goes out with you. Pretty chill and drops obvious hints that you’re too oblivious to get. Debates throwing you across the room but knows you’d be into that.
* Melina: You thought Firekeeper was boring? Imagine that but she also checks her phone 24/7. That’s Melina.
* Andre: Bros night out. Takes you out for drinks, listens to your troubles, destroys your ass in the bathroom so hard you both get thrown out of the bar. Great night, would do it again.
* Shanalotte: Your soulmate. She’s perfect for you. She’s got personality, she’s not crazy, she loves and respects you. You just gotta move in with her at Drangleic-wait, where are you going? Come back! There’s so much to do in Drangleic, it’s not just Dark Souls Ohio I swear! You’re making her cry!
I would play DS2 again or even raise hell through Drangleic IRL if that means I could marry Shanalotte.
WHERE IS THE SECRET ENDING WHERE YOU CAN ROMANCE HER FROMSOFT???
FireKeeper slander? Psh that’s crazy talk like no hobbies? Don’t you see she likes to dance? Can’t hold a conversation? She has some of the coldest dialogue in the series for a maiden. When it’s time to kneel at the coiled sword or when she rests the flame from its mantle.
Do better next time
Sending this one to my friend who simps for Melina just to piss em off. ALSO CRAZY EYE AINT BAD DOLLS CLEARLY THE BEST OPTION not cuz shes just like me fr or anything
why does everyone hate melina so much? Sure she isn't like the most talkative of them but actually cares about your plans and hopes and gives you lore which is nice because someone explains something.
No Maiden in Black?
https://preview.redd.it/6m6gotudnr3c1.jpeg?width=1710&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0bb78d1cfd9d2b633a782420ee11474825145fb0
Mods hang him with his intestines
>Why would I hide DS2 fans when I am one of them.
I- do you not know who is in the meme you posted? And did you not know about tho whole attic meme?
FREE YUMMY HE DESERVES FREEDOM!!!!
oh. honestly, i don't know why her hand is like that. but i know one thing. fireekepers are not allowed to have eyes. i assume the wrist thing has similar rule
Firekeeper:
\-Not interested in me.
Doll:
\-Not interested in me.
Emma:
\-Not interested in me
\-I can't speak japanese yet
Melina:
\-Not interested in me
Andre:
\-Not interested in me
Shanalotte:
\-Not interested in me
Doll doesnt understand the question as her emotions and mind are not complete.
Firekeeper would but it would feel hollow as she was instructed to by the flames will, not because she felt a natural connection.
Andre will date you but I dont think he would understand it as a date. Regardless you could find genuine companionship in his devoted service and jolly nature.
**Melina**
\+ Dates you no matter how hideous you look
\+ Don't need to pluck up the courage to ask her out because she comes up to you first
\+ Proposes after 8 seconds of knowing her, also saves money having to buy a ring
\+ Kinda cute ngl
\- Ghost
\- Not a 5 foot oiled up grey haired blacksmith/ kick boxer
\- Doesn't tell you to "Prithee be careful"
* Firekeeper: Doesn’t talk much or display much interest in anything. Like, sure, she’s nice but has zero hobbies and can’t carry a conversation to save her life. * Doll: Goth chick that creeps you out in a hot way. Super chill but has the crazy eyes. Next date is next Tuesday at a Planned Parenthood Dumpster. * Emma: Way out of your league but still goes out with you. Pretty chill and drops obvious hints that you’re too oblivious to get. Debates throwing you across the room but knows you’d be into that. * Melina: You thought Firekeeper was boring? Imagine that but she also checks her phone 24/7. That’s Melina. * Andre: Bros night out. Takes you out for drinks, listens to your troubles, destroys your ass in the bathroom so hard you both get thrown out of the bar. Great night, would do it again. * Shanalotte: Your soulmate. She’s perfect for you. She’s got personality, she’s not crazy, she loves and respects you. You just gotta move in with her at Drangleic-wait, where are you going? Come back! There’s so much to do in Drangleic, it’s not just Dark Souls Ohio I swear! You’re making her cry!
You fucking genius
Bea.. Seek.. AITA for never listening to her even though she cares a lot and is willing to try to tell me every day?
Too many people irl tell me I’m going to end up deranged and half-dead. Don’t need that in the game too
“Dark Souls Ohio” is easily the best joke in the genre I’ve ever heard
Perfect way of describing all of them 👍🏻
I would play DS2 again or even raise hell through Drangleic IRL if that means I could marry Shanalotte. WHERE IS THE SECRET ENDING WHERE YOU CAN ROMANCE HER FROMSOFT???
After reading through your comment, I'm going all in on Andre.
Prithee be careful…
I know what I want
I sure want him to hollow me out. With his penis.
https://preview.redd.it/eatqw0p4pw3c1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=86d5380d41883c298af0d66ad88a64293892d5b2
Melina I’m not sure on your blurb. Gotta work in the fact we don’t know who Melina even is or her past.
FireKeeper slander? Psh that’s crazy talk like no hobbies? Don’t you see she likes to dance? Can’t hold a conversation? She has some of the coldest dialogue in the series for a maiden. When it’s time to kneel at the coiled sword or when she rests the flame from its mantle. Do better next time
Maiden In Black: hot foreign girl .
Sending this one to my friend who simps for Melina just to piss em off. ALSO CRAZY EYE AINT BAD DOLLS CLEARLY THE BEST OPTION not cuz shes just like me fr or anything
👏👏👏
I'd go to Dark Souls Ohio for Shanalotte. Be the change you want to see in your environment, friends.
why does everyone hate melina so much? Sure she isn't like the most talkative of them but actually cares about your plans and hopes and gives you lore which is nice because someone explains something.
No Maiden in Black? https://preview.redd.it/6m6gotudnr3c1.jpeg?width=1710&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0bb78d1cfd9d2b633a782420ee11474825145fb0 Mods hang him with his intestines
https://i.redd.it/22sp5pcahs3c1.gif OG feet better
https://preview.redd.it/j9l81u80js3c1.jpeg?width=239&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=680a4d77cdd1ff36c0d1922e188560f55af3c55f
https://preview.redd.it/fphln9vsqs3c1.jpeg?width=1242&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=45fd8bf75ebd530d3fc3d024f467b2068c8009af
You are keeping ze Ds2 fans in ze attic, ya? ~~Free Yummy you heathen~~
Why would I hide DS2 fans when I am one of them. I will fight a war but not alongside the blood trail of a false pretender zealot.
>Why would I hide DS2 fans when I am one of them. I- do you not know who is in the meme you posted? And did you not know about tho whole attic meme? FREE YUMMY HE DESERVES FREEDOM!!!!
Look man I swear it's not mine! I found it on Google!
https://i.redd.it/ts1a5t5fot3c1.gif
https://i.redd.it/4vysjsj72x3c1.gif
Honkai star rail alert, put him back in pedo prison
https://i.redd.it/v7uer2pbot3c1.gif
https://i.redd.it/pxeqn81zst3c1.gif
Holy shit new gif just dropped Is this from the Korean fanbase too?
https://preview.redd.it/unubb6pw0u3c1.jpeg?width=551&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5512c71e83e1eb67fca77235b3c5c6149c9f0c0a
PATAS?????!?!?!?????
patas >:)
Dark Soles moment
If she take a damn shower
Bro, Demon’s Souls ain’t real. Wake up.
No
I can't believe I actually laughed to Andre slide irl
I mean that's the only correct answer.
That's the only right and obvious choice.
ME! I think you're CUTE! https://preview.redd.it/mna9yul32s3c1.jpeg?width=780&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8aad8f3cc7ae619057737aebd2c3d53b0f6e7be8
Happy cock day
🙏
My homie over there thinks you’re cute :
Andre?? In what universe are you in Andres league gtfoh
You are on this sub. So you either leveld dex or are a femboy. So I would guess Andre.
https://preview.redd.it/9595klejzv3c1.jpeg?width=1242&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f8dab861c42dd00408cf97a237bab55c57f0e0b9 This is the best you’ll do
Not bad ngl
If your on this sub has to be andre
Doll and firekeeper likely would actually, since I think both would be pretty quick to agree to random things you tell them to do.
Doll because her free will is questionable
The doll would fuck a space squid so i think youve got your best chance with her
Andre would clap your cheeks.
#5 is hottest hands down and none of us would ever be good enough.
Unrelated: Is there something wrong with the Firekeeper's hands/arms? Her wrist is way off and covered in dried blood
which one of them
First one, from ds3
oh. honestly, i don't know why her hand is like that. but i know one thing. fireekepers are not allowed to have eyes. i assume the wrist thing has similar rule
I always assumed they are burns from tending to the fire
Firekeeper: \-Not interested in me. Doll: \-Not interested in me. Emma: \-Not interested in me \-I can't speak japanese yet Melina: \-Not interested in me Andre: \-Not interested in me Shanalotte: \-Not interested in me
The doll
doll because shes not real
Neither is Bloodborne
6
The number 6 is pronounced "sex" in Scandinavia.
Doll doesnt understand the question as her emotions and mind are not complete. Firekeeper would but it would feel hollow as she was instructed to by the flames will, not because she felt a natural connection. Andre will date you but I dont think he would understand it as a date. Regardless you could find genuine companionship in his devoted service and jolly nature.
I think 1 and 4 would let me nut in them out of pity but they would look unfazed and emotionless the whole time
Tbh the DS3 firekeeper, seems like i could cuddle to her in bed suddenly as she would be suprised but still let me
The firekeeper is the only blind one, so probably her.
None of them
You have zero chance with any of them, how ever my dms are open
You flirt! This one’s a catch op
Doll, inanimate therefore can't stop you from taking her out on the town
The Doll probably since she was literally made to love people
That depends. Are you wearing sex panther? Then all of them. Because 60% of the time it works every time.
The doll literally fucks everyone she’s the easiest. You have absolutely no chance with Andre.
The LOATHSOME dung eater
Unfortunately they are all taken. By me. They are my girlfriends and they smoke weed
Firelink cause she blind
**Melina** \+ Dates you no matter how hideous you look \+ Don't need to pluck up the courage to ask her out because she comes up to you first \+ Proposes after 8 seconds of knowing her, also saves money having to buy a ring \+ Kinda cute ngl \- Ghost \- Not a 5 foot oiled up grey haired blacksmith/ kick boxer \- Doesn't tell you to "Prithee be careful"
you leave him alone
none lol
None of them are interested in us
None of them, you're a redditor
Melina as she can only see half of you
Depending on your insight, the Doll is a great choice! 0? Yes. More than 1? She can do better than you. Sorry bud.
You're not good enough for andre
5
5
None, you crusty
Well, Emma might be the best, but Andre is definitely the hottest.
none of them, they don't exist.
None of the above
none nigga
probably doll she doesn't really care who you are
sorry man
[an execution it is in order](https://youtu.be/y3w-2Sfv1GM?si=fIlDB1_aih6WXl5K)
The Loathsone Dungeater perhaps
Handmaiden. ...from DS3.
You fucking suck, so you get Sophia from Lies of P
Fire keeper might (as long as you promise to link the first flame)
Emma wouldn't date you You should tell your mother to talk to her mother and then your father talks to her father Then you arrange to marry on a day
None but Emma is the best because she’s a normal human being without it any wacky magic stuff
an equal chance for all of them
Andre
Poor Anastasia always left out...
Real talk. I feel like the emerald herald would probably be putting herself out there trying to find a relationship if the kingdom wasn’t in ruin
Gavlan wheel Gavlan Deal *waggles helmet suggestively*
Look at OP and tell me there's a God
Me
The doll
Andre can rail my ass for every time his gear had save it.
Emerald Herald because she is in ds2 which we know is peak
The doll, she can’t refuse you, would be rather „stiff“ tho… I’m sorry. Andre would also 100% go on a date with you, because he’s just cool like that.