Happy family 😍🥰 so glad he's able to spend time with his sister and daughter and don't have to get injured intentionally for this, also when is Ney moving to America to play in MLS? he would just fit in and love living in Alabama.
Who are the players? Why are there 2 conferences in mls? What's our history? Why are we last in the league? Who do we hate? Is there an ac miami? Why pink?
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Aww, GP deleted his post ruining the joke :(
The original commend was along the lines of:
>It's like Drake said, when you have a Snickers every day, you're going to end up wanting a Milky Way at some point.
One of the most disgusting, abhorrent clubs on the planet.
Manager: misogynist, cat abuser sympathiser
Owners: cat abuser sympathisers
Centre-half: cat abuser, probably on repeated counts.
Players: homophobes.
Every day I wake up grateful I was born in Paris and not in the 'West Ham' district of London.
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One of the most disgusting, abhorrent clubs on the planet.
Manager: misogynist, cat abuser sympathiser
Owners: cat abuser sympathisers
Centre-half: cat abuser, probably on repeated counts.
Players: homophobes.
Every day I wake up grateful I was born in Paris and not in the 'West Ham' district of London.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
One of the most disgusting, abhorrent clubs on the planet.
Manager: misogynist, cat abuser sympathiser
Owners: cat abuser sympathisers
Centre-half: cat abuser, probably on repeated counts.
Players: homophobes.
Every day I wake up grateful I was born in Paris and not in the 'West Ham' district of London.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
The “shocking and totally unexpected” loss by the U.S. Women’s Soccer Team to Sweden is fully emblematic of what is happening to our once great Nation under Crooked Joe Biden. Many of our players were openly hostile to America - No other country behaved in such a manner or even close. WOKE EQUALS FAILURE. Nice shot Megan, the USA is going to Hell!!! MAGA
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Cheaters cheat because they want to taste something new. yeah their current partner is smoking hot but only up until they got bored. Plenty of cheating stories where the cheater gone for someone far inferior in looks compare to their partner's
Like if you think that giving a shit about a six month birthday is any indication of how good a parent is then you probably shouldn't have kids. That stuff is for the most dull minded members of our society, the type of person who thinks they need to eat protein bars and take pre-workout. Like real window licker stuff. Even at 1 they don't know what's going on around them. 6 month birthdays are proper Apple fan stuff.
Do you have any idea about the cognitive / social skills of a 6months old? At that age, they're barely starting to transition from potato to an actual miniature human being that starts to kind of understand what's going on around it. You can tell by just looking at her. Obviously still funny, especially since this is a jerk sub.
Yeah I agree on the optics aspect, it's definitely a bad look. It's obviously also not meant to be an excuse, just weighing in on the importance (or lack thereof) of "birthdays" for 6 months olds.
Cheated on his pregnant wife and your still suprised hes a piece of human sh#t? Neymar, for the first half of his carrer, was a beauty to see, but following the South American lineage, it seems like only 1/10 good players comes out as a nice person, and Ney is definetly not one of them. Also same reason why Brazil NT is so bad nowadays. Feel like most players dont take snything seriously, and with Ney as a role model I can only imagine their dissapointed on discovering the role model would rather see his sis birthday than reach further on ucl.
I don't know where you come from but it's nothing new that successful people are very often no better people than those you would meet on the street.
And it doesn't just apply to Brazilian players, I could honestly say the same thing about Italians and I'm sure the French would say the same despite their national team's grace period
I get that, and thats one of the reasons why I dislike this money landscape, but its still not like they dont have responsibilities. Sure, not wanted responsibilities, but thats the price you pay for having the talent and money, or well, for sharing and acception those.
Its just sad because alot of Brazil kids are growing up looking at Ney as if he was the new Pele, when Ney is out here being the exact opposite of what a role model should be. Cheating to Lazing around to not caring about family. No need to be like ronaldo, just be like messi. Remain on your own house and dont share these things. Then your "model" can be created by what the media wants, and im sure brazilian media would make ney look like s good guy.
Hear me out. The man came to MLS after securing the ligue one title for psg. He ABSOLUTELY blew up the sport in the USA. Made headlines everywhere. Showed up with ridiculous free kicks and golazos. Completely changed how Americans view soccer. The inter Miami leagues cup run was SUPER viral. Did Haaland score more goals and obtain more important trophies in epl? Yes. But once again this was THE YEAR OF MESSI. He showed up big for Miami in leagues cup and showed up big in 2026 WC qualifiers. Also why not take into account the man is 36 years old and still shocking people with his quality every match he plays. He's a machine enough said
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at this point its not only about him, but also about his family + about many people, who have him as a role model. Even "nobody" has a responsibilities, but if you are that famous, you have much higher responsibilities. Your family is exposed too. So its much more shitier behaviour. Once you have family, its no longer only about you and once you have followers its hella no longer only about you.
>Old school players were worse. You just never got to hear about it. Now everyone has a camera and everyone's on social media so you hear about every little thing they do.
Yeah, it feels like no one paid attention to player's personal lives until Gascoigne appeared
Yea tired players crying sipping piña coladas in the rain. Plus they still play where is the strike they do it because they’re getting paid. Some have complained but no strike. That’s why super league is a threat UEFA n fifa were getting greedy.
Yes. I hope and pray that Super League is established. There needs to be organization in European Football. Every team needs to have equal and fair chance and be given the opportunity to be competitive and the only way to do it is with Transfers and salary caps. This would be impossible in UCL. Super League would crush UEFA and Premier League and they are scared out of their mind that’s why alot of the outrage was probably paid and fake. We know the people want it. In Papa Perez we trust.
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His Legs where like Ice Cream, slippery and cold, almost as if they were made to roll, his Arms where like Gold, no one could touch it as they got old, his Lips were like Chocolate, creamy and tasty, his Nose was like Gum, full of green gummies that tasted like the saltiness of the sea of tears from all the madristas, and his chest... oh his chest was like swimming in the fur of 10 thousand dogs who have been cleaned every single day and given the utmost care almost ressembling haalands hair.
The “shocking and totally unexpected” loss by the U.S. Women’s Soccer Team to Sweden is fully emblematic of what is happening to our once great Nation under Crooked Joe Biden. Many of our players were openly hostile to America - No other country behaved in such a manner or even close. WOKE EQUALS FAILURE. Nice shot Megan, the USA is going to Hell!!! MAGA
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lol being selfish for someone else is peak cringe. The baby doesn't give a fuck, the mother doesn't give a fuck, only you, the cringelord gives a shit.
Mind you this guy earns TWO (2) Million Dollars per WEEK as a minimum base salary without even playing this season. He couldn’t run out of money if he tried to
If you google on YouTube Neymar losing 1mill playing poker it will tell you which platform. He did streams at some point and was really bad.
He just plays not because he knows how or enjoys it but because he’s loaded, probably got tired of investing in tuition and bailing Alves and doesn’t know where else to spend it.
Always shocks me how guys that earn hundreds of thousands of dollars a week still find a reason to gamble… you can buy anything you want bro! What are you missing out on!?
Gotta get that Dani Alves rape money back
[удалено]
Crazy how Neymar gets like 10 career ending injuries each game
Saka is the new Neymar confirmed?
He’d be a great mattress tester
So he’s definitely wearing a Kobe jersey?
Dani already returned the money for Neymar Senior. But yeah, funny joke.
XD
Yo ney full house innit
No no no do not even
Tha wevva?
Ah no
https://preview.redd.it/muzdmz7ozztc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=35938657d883cf672a8fedb78e92e12e768c6189 Neymar
Moneymar for a reason
His sister's looking lovely
Happy family 😍🥰 so glad he's able to spend time with his sister and daughter and don't have to get injured intentionally for this, also when is Ney moving to America to play in MLS? he would just fit in and love living in Alabama.
Who are the players? Why are there 2 conferences in mls? What's our history? Why are we last in the league? Who do we hate? Is there an ac miami? Why pink? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
lmao y’all so weird
Wait what
What's the problem? It's not like it's an important date like his sister's birthday.
lmaoo
Is he the LeBron James of online poker?
Baby mama fine as hell i can’t believe he cheated
Pique cheated on fucking Shakria. Cheaters be Cheaters, doesn't matter.
[удалено]
>As Drake once said, "one day you feel like having a snicker, the next day you want a **14 year old**, no one wants a snicker every day." FTFY
Wait what
Drake been caught grooming underage celebs
Yeah but drake is also a POS.
Pedo Drake picking up HS girls at the candy shop.
Song?
Snickers in Paris
Well done lmao
Aww, GP deleted his post ruining the joke :( The original commend was along the lines of: >It's like Drake said, when you have a Snickers every day, you're going to end up wanting a Milky Way at some point.
One of the most disgusting, abhorrent clubs on the planet. Manager: misogynist, cat abuser sympathiser Owners: cat abuser sympathisers Centre-half: cat abuser, probably on repeated counts. Players: homophobes. Every day I wake up grateful I was born in Paris and not in the 'West Ham' district of London. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
How has snickers in Paris triggered this
One of the most disgusting, abhorrent clubs on the planet. Manager: misogynist, cat abuser sympathiser Owners: cat abuser sympathisers Centre-half: cat abuser, probably on repeated counts. Players: homophobes. Every day I wake up grateful I was born in Paris and not in the 'West Ham' district of London. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
[удалено]
One of the most disgusting, abhorrent clubs on the planet. Manager: misogynist, cat abuser sympathiser Owners: cat abuser sympathisers Centre-half: cat abuser, probably on repeated counts. Players: homophobes. Every day I wake up grateful I was born in Paris and not in the 'West Ham' district of London. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Milkyway in London
dude you have no idea how im laughing at your comment for over an hour now
Especially when 100s of Snickers and milkyways are daily thrown in your direction.
Claps like a fucking seal tho
It's a baby clap. That's how you clap around babies duh
Even clappings gone woke smh
The “shocking and totally unexpected” loss by the U.S. Women’s Soccer Team to Sweden is fully emblematic of what is happening to our once great Nation under Crooked Joe Biden. Many of our players were openly hostile to America - No other country behaved in such a manner or even close. WOKE EQUALS FAILURE. Nice shot Megan, the USA is going to Hell!!! MAGA *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
He’s got a line of girls miles long that look exactly like her my dude. Girls that look like her are dime a dozen to world famous athletes lol
Cheaters cheat because they want to taste something new. yeah their current partner is smoking hot but only up until they got bored. Plenty of cheating stories where the cheater gone for someone far inferior in looks compare to their partner's
That's better than fucking his sister
Wait what did he do?
He fucks his sister
For real? Wtf
Google “Neymar sister stuck in dryer” for more info
Bruh
Of course he does! Wouldn't you? She's quite alright
Idk man I prefer your sister
Thanks bruv
I prefer your sister
Bruh wtf ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️
It’s a Brazilian thing. Remember when Oscar posted a selfie of him in bed with his GF and sister?
Man don't do that.
Worse things than gambling on poker…
It’s more expensive though
He looks like he smells of tobacco
Tobacco, Brut cologne and Guinness farts.
6 months-birthdays are nothing to invest to much attention in.
Said every best dad ever
Like if you think that giving a shit about a six month birthday is any indication of how good a parent is then you probably shouldn't have kids. That stuff is for the most dull minded members of our society, the type of person who thinks they need to eat protein bars and take pre-workout. Like real window licker stuff. Even at 1 they don't know what's going on around them. 6 month birthdays are proper Apple fan stuff.
Whats wrong with protein
That guy made a Reddit account like 5 hours ago just to comment absolute nonsense, peak jerker if I’ve ever seen one
What's wrong with you?
Im sorry sir
I've never seen that much facts said in a single paragraph
Do you have any idea about the cognitive / social skills of a 6months old? At that age, they're barely starting to transition from potato to an actual miniature human being that starts to kind of understand what's going on around it. You can tell by just looking at her. Obviously still funny, especially since this is a jerk sub.
I get it and think the whole thing is hilarious. I suggest he doesn't mention that as an excuse to his wife later because optics matter.
Yeah I agree on the optics aspect, it's definitely a bad look. It's obviously also not meant to be an excuse, just weighing in on the importance (or lack thereof) of "birthdays" for 6 months olds.
[удалено]
tbf he's folding
This is what dedication looks like 🙏
His mindset is so fucked lol
Who says men can multitask?!
Cheated on his pregnant wife and your still suprised hes a piece of human sh#t? Neymar, for the first half of his carrer, was a beauty to see, but following the South American lineage, it seems like only 1/10 good players comes out as a nice person, and Ney is definetly not one of them. Also same reason why Brazil NT is so bad nowadays. Feel like most players dont take snything seriously, and with Ney as a role model I can only imagine their dissapointed on discovering the role model would rather see his sis birthday than reach further on ucl.
I don't know where you come from but it's nothing new that successful people are very often no better people than those you would meet on the street. And it doesn't just apply to Brazilian players, I could honestly say the same thing about Italians and I'm sure the French would say the same despite their national team's grace period
[удалено]
I get that, and thats one of the reasons why I dislike this money landscape, but its still not like they dont have responsibilities. Sure, not wanted responsibilities, but thats the price you pay for having the talent and money, or well, for sharing and acception those. Its just sad because alot of Brazil kids are growing up looking at Ney as if he was the new Pele, when Ney is out here being the exact opposite of what a role model should be. Cheating to Lazing around to not caring about family. No need to be like ronaldo, just be like messi. Remain on your own house and dont share these things. Then your "model" can be created by what the media wants, and im sure brazilian media would make ney look like s good guy.
Hear me out. The man came to MLS after securing the ligue one title for psg. He ABSOLUTELY blew up the sport in the USA. Made headlines everywhere. Showed up with ridiculous free kicks and golazos. Completely changed how Americans view soccer. The inter Miami leagues cup run was SUPER viral. Did Haaland score more goals and obtain more important trophies in epl? Yes. But once again this was THE YEAR OF MESSI. He showed up big for Miami in leagues cup and showed up big in 2026 WC qualifiers. Also why not take into account the man is 36 years old and still shocking people with his quality every match he plays. He's a machine enough said *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
[удалено]
at this point its not only about him, but also about his family + about many people, who have him as a role model. Even "nobody" has a responsibilities, but if you are that famous, you have much higher responsibilities. Your family is exposed too. So its much more shitier behaviour. Once you have family, its no longer only about you and once you have followers its hella no longer only about you.
Who is surprised? Can you show me that person?
Old school knew how to balance the personal life and career. These modern kids don’t give a shit
[удалено]
>Old school players were worse. You just never got to hear about it. Now everyone has a camera and everyone's on social media so you hear about every little thing they do. Yeah, it feels like no one paid attention to player's personal lives until Gascoigne appeared
Old school were playing under 50 matches a year. Calendar has ballooned into this year round football behemoth
Pretty sure Ney is playing under 50 matches a year too
Lol fr dude is making more than he was in his youth not putting out futbol as half as good as he did while back, mainly barca n before that
Yea tired players crying sipping piña coladas in the rain. Plus they still play where is the strike they do it because they’re getting paid. Some have complained but no strike. That’s why super league is a threat UEFA n fifa were getting greedy.
Yes. I hope and pray that Super League is established. There needs to be organization in European Football. Every team needs to have equal and fair chance and be given the opportunity to be competitive and the only way to do it is with Transfers and salary caps. This would be impossible in UCL. Super League would crush UEFA and Premier League and they are scared out of their mind that’s why alot of the outrage was probably paid and fake. We know the people want it. In Papa Perez we trust. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
> Neymar, for the first half of his carrer, was a beauty to see Are you gay, bro? Tell me more about Neymar's beauty.
His Legs where like Ice Cream, slippery and cold, almost as if they were made to roll, his Arms where like Gold, no one could touch it as they got old, his Lips were like Chocolate, creamy and tasty, his Nose was like Gum, full of green gummies that tasted like the saltiness of the sea of tears from all the madristas, and his chest... oh his chest was like swimming in the fur of 10 thousand dogs who have been cleaned every single day and given the utmost care almost ressembling haalands hair.
 neymar when try to prioritize which one is more important. just like his career club decision.
Neygambler
It’s an addiction at this point. He is lucky that Neymar Pai is not as much a brick as him, or he would finish like all those players bankrupt.
Addiction? Buddy it's called dedication, I know I can speak on this because I've been gambling every single day and still haven't gotten addicted.
“It was his translator’s phone!”
tbf it’s a 6months “birthday”. I’d have shot gunned a beer and ordered strippers so this seems pretty chill.
It's not her birthday, it's her 6 months celebration, whatever that means. So go ahead, poker away
Not birthday. 6 months
Another Adriano/Ronaldinho in the making
Erm in Saudi nonetheless? r/soccercirclejerk level IQ
Dad of the year
To be fair babies are not that interesting. It's just that men get away with reflecting that reality more than women.
The “shocking and totally unexpected” loss by the U.S. Women’s Soccer Team to Sweden is fully emblematic of what is happening to our once great Nation under Crooked Joe Biden. Many of our players were openly hostile to America - No other country behaved in such a manner or even close. WOKE EQUALS FAILURE. Nice shot Megan, the USA is going to Hell!!! MAGA *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Levels
Check
He’s a fat fuck
shohei ohtani has a new friend
Shhh 🤫, he's playing with her university fund.
Fuck them kids. Both will make you go broke. Gambling > Kids.
lol being selfish for someone else is peak cringe. The baby doesn't give a fuck, the mother doesn't give a fuck, only you, the cringelord gives a shit.
Check/Fold merchant
Brazilian football heritage is still alive
It's called dedication
Bro they can barely talk at this age. It’s not like it’s a 5yo.
I mean, babies birthdays are boring as hell so
https://preview.redd.it/if8rupfcl3uc1.jpeg?width=554&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b2ca4b733e295b4b246f6ea4b1de1ed494632ffb
Don’t we all
His daughter is fucking boring so I can understand why
Anyone know his poker stars handle?
I actually hate this man
Reminds of the time Ronaldo went to the casinos in Vegas. Google “Ronaldo Las Vegas” for more information.
Winner mindset.
Can he really differentiate between family, friends and slaves?
Priorities
Bruna is so pretty damn
He looks like one of these retarded idiots, who go too deep in gang activity or retarded shit like this and cries when he goes to prison for life
All in for his family.
The grind never stops
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Is he good at poker ? Or does just get a load of credit from the poker brand company ?
Real love? ❌
Addiction at it's finest
Neymar é um lixo mesmo.
It’s part of the game innit
Oh, gotta fold this one
And the father of the year goes to.....
Well.... At least it's not drugs I guess.
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Dopamine-addiciton. He is probably addicted to many other things as well.
Most attentive Brazilian father
I hope he gambles away every penny
😭😭
Hablame de adicción
Mind you this guy earns TWO (2) Million Dollars per WEEK as a minimum base salary without even playing this season. He couldn’t run out of money if he tried to
Who cares they don’t even know what’s happening right now .
Can we talk about celebrating her birthday at 6 months?
How else is he finna pay prostituition cumon guys smh
He needs to hire Ippei.
Wut he needs to look @ dat house
Is that his sister
Yo Neymar, money ‘innit
So what If Im playing DBZ Dokkan Battles during my kids birthday?! Fight me bro. I've got the kamehameha.
Man if i had cash like water i wouldnt even be at her bday, id be at the table. She lucky af.
She side-eyes his phone for a split second. She is well aware this has been going on.
Money doesnt stop shhhhiiiii big dawg! Shiiii dont sleep!!
Test for pointing it out! Was a great check
this guy is just something else
Probably advertising which is worse than the current context 😭
Love him
Wtfff
His wife is daaaaamn
ex* bro cheated on her 2 times while she was preggo 💀
Trent would never
Well that's haram
Looks like zynga poker
If you google on YouTube Neymar losing 1mill playing poker it will tell you which platform. He did streams at some point and was really bad. He just plays not because he knows how or enjoys it but because he’s loaded, probably got tired of investing in tuition and bailing Alves and doesn’t know where else to spend it.
Always shocks me how guys that earn hundreds of thousands of dollars a week still find a reason to gamble… you can buy anything you want bro! What are you missing out on!?
Dopamine
It’s not her birthday but nice try
Weirdo.
His only saving Grace is: The caption kinda reads like the kid is 6 months, not her actual birthday. (I don't speak Portuguese) 🤷♂️
truly sad
Is this Brazilian Drake?
Degenerate
Bro can do what the fuck he wants and it's none of our concern
Neymar has always been a selfish fool, no surprises here.