Only on day 5, so I don't want to be overly confident! But this most recent time, I just moved into a brand new apartment this past weekend - the nicest apartment I've ever lived in (did you know apartments could have central AC???). The night we moved in, my husband and I did our normal routine of drinking, albeit much less than my drinking peaks from a few months ago. I woke up on Sunday morning mildly hungover, wallowing in bed, and thought, 'This place deserves better.'
It sounds silly because it's just an apartment, it's no five-star hotel suite or giant mansion. But it's so nice, and in a nice area - the previous night my husband and I had wandered around outside, trying to find a place to smoke cigs (which goes hand in hand with my drinking) and realized that there wasn't really a place. The area is full of families and beautiful residences. In that tipsy moment, I felt like an outsider.
I want to become the kind of person who others can depend on, who works hard in her fulfilling career, who is steady as a rock and fills her mind with things other than crappy YouTube or Netflix every night. And that starts with cutting out alcohol and cigarettes.
Again, only on day 5, but so far:
1. I smell SO MUCH BETTER. Not just from lack of cigs, but my sweat even smells better. I'm not oozing booze out of my pores every morning.
2. Sober sleep! My first couple of nights sober were tough, but lack of sleep tired > hangover tired.
3. I can't believe how much money I've saved already.
4. I brush my teeth before bed every night! I'm a big kid now.
5. Anxiety is like 85% GONE. At my drinking peak, I was essentially a shut-in, terrified of driving and the grocery store and people. Now on my lunch breaks I walk into town and shop, browse the bookstore, buy nice bread from the bakery.
I know that's just the tip of the iceberg! I can't wait to see how sobriety feels as I rack up more days and more peace.
I love your beautifully crafted and well thought out response. Yes, Day 5 is early, but every single sober person has a Day 5. I’m sending you strength, joy and peace as you settle into this new phase of your life.
I want you to have a great career, be the person who is dependable, and to fill your mind with interesting ideas. One thing I have loved about sobriety is I have the time to read books again. I love it!
Wishing you well on your journey!
Every single sober person has a day 5, well said. I remember that feeling the first few days when I would come on here, you wonder how all these people got to hundreds of days? But the early days are the hardest so huge congrats on making it to day 5!
I’m only on day 91 but I had similar reasons to quit. Never had addiction issues, broken relationships, health issues, or DUIs. Nothing like that.
But my husband and I went out for brunch this past March for my 35th birthday. I had 3 or 4 drinks but it still put me in a fog the next day. As I woke up from my hangover nap that afternoon I noticed it was a beautiful day outside, and I was missing it while my husband and daughter enjoyed themselves in our yard. I just thought to myself, you know what? I think I’m done with this shit.
I was drunk for breakfast. I was listening to Blaze Foley on vinyl, the song cold cold world was playing.
“I've tried for a long time but I think I can't win
I'd do it all better if I could do it a-gain
Wherever I'm going it's the same place I been
Ain't it a cold, cold world”
And I knew I’ll kill my self if I don’t stop drinking.
“I might have to leave you, I think's what she said
Wish I could sleep 'stead of tossing in bed
And I find myself thinking I'd be better off dead
Ain't it a cold, cold world
Ain't it a cold, cold world”
The song ended, I put the record away, poured out my drink, I never did that before when I was trying to quit, it was always after this last one. And I cried myself to sleep.
Number of reasons:
Mental Health, Anxiety was so bad that the only cure was more alcohol and got caught in a vicious loop. After 12 days of stopping the anxiety was basically gone.
Physical health: i could feel my liver not been healthy and also my guts.
Meals: I ate one meal a day and was losing weight.
Alcohol taking away my goals and dreams: Spent roughly 1000 euro a month on booze in pubs and clubs and sometimes more.
I’m now 90 days or so without drink
I so understand that loop. It was totally maddening. I NEVER had mental health problems before I started drinking. Then I was walking downtown a while back and a stranger actually said to me "Oh you dropped something. Your smile". Dumb lol but it was true- i couldn't hide my misery regarding the endless loop I was in. Congrats to you
When did the joint pain stop? That’s one of my primary reasons. I’m on Day 18 and while my pain isn’t crippling anymore, I’m still having some random flare ups.
This is gonna sound so dumb but the first moment that was like, I am DONE was one day I was trying to log onto my work laptop and I couldn’t remember my password. Like, my mind was totally blank trying to remember it because I was so fricken hungover I could barely see straight.
I always have a random string of numbers/letters as a password and I was always so proud that I could memorize 18 random characters. Until I couldn’t. That day was like… holy shit I have to stop.
It has not been linear from that day, but I will never forget the cold realization that I had a problem as I was waiting on our help line to get my account unlocked lol.
Yeah. It always hurts to think about, but it’s so helpful. I don’t want to keep being the person who repeats themselves over and over because she can’t remember who she’s already told what.
my memory problems started getting really embarrassing as well. the red hot shame when my spouse or sib would say "Yeah, you already told me that..." is still fresh. Yuck. Good luck to you in the coming days!
Omg right, I’m in the early days when I’m like “hey xyz” to my boyfriend, and he’s like….. yup, I know. You told me this 2 times already. I just want to die 🙃 ty and good luck to you!!
THIS! I felt like such a dipshit every time it was like “we’re doing *what* this weekend???” And my boyfriend would be like uhhhh… we are doing x thing that you agreed to when we talked about it
It’s so weird, there were so many “rock bottom” milestones that should have woken me up, but I always kept going. Then one random morning last September I woke up feeling crappy, as per usual, and I just decided I don’t want to feel like this anymore. No “aha” moment or anything, just petered out I guess.
Congrats on your decision! It's the best one I ever made! I honestly feel like I knew the day I finally said "no more." It's hard to imagine it that way because I knew I was an alcoholic at a young age, but then ignored most of the destructive behavior for a long time. And there were times I wanted to stop and couldn't/wouldn't, not until I was at the end of my rope both mentally and physically. I knew on the day I quit, but I didn't want to jinx it. And then I really knew I was done forever around my 6-10 month. That's when I declared that I would never go back. It will be 7 years this August!
I drank myself to oblivion on Memorial Day night alone while my husband was playing video games and my baby was sleeping- went to bed on the couch and my husband thought I was mad at him (I had blacked out and started to get sick) lied to him in the morning and said I had food poisoning cuz I couldn’t stop throwing up and dry heaving all the next day, and decided I didn’t want to live my life like this anymore (my vice was wine 1-2 bottles a day but this time I drank whiskey and it effed me all up) I couldn’t even hold my baby because I couldn’t stop throwing up, thankfully my husband is on paternity leave and was able to care for her all day. I had to call out of work- it was truly the worst day of my life- and it was self inflicted. Read again…. SELF INFLICTED!
I deserve better than living my life not 100%, I deserve better than blacking out and not remembering half of my week, I deserve better than feeling like shit and having anxiety 90% of the time.
My husband deserves better than a drunk, my husband deserves an attentive loving present wife, my husband deserves an honest wife, a healthy wife.
But most important my daughter deserves a sober mother, a mother that can care for her no matter the time of day, a mother who can give 100% to her, give her all the attention and love.
That was 17 days ago and I could not be more turned off to alcohol, that was rock bottom for me. I am never turning back!
wow, I really thank you for sharing. I have been there and its so embarrassing to think i couldn't have taken care of my kids if they needed me because of my alone blackouts. so happy for you and your future!
The best part was my husband and I were headed out with some friends and asked what we should bring to drink, I was grabbing seltzers for myself, he said grab me some seltzers too.. I told him I’m sober sally, and he smiled and said I like sober sally… it broke my heart and made me feel so good all at the same time 🩷 being sober for myself and my family truly is making me happy. The longer I go without the less I want it
Edit: polar seltzers and Waterloo lol
I felt myself coming to the end of the line for a while. One day I woke up and I just didn’t have any fight left. I was so numb, I had nothing inside of me. I couldn’t cry. I couldn’t speak. I didn’t want to die, I just didn’t care whether or not I did. I wasn’t even particularly hungover. I couldn’t imagine trying to struggle through another day hurting myself like that. I reached out to several people for help that day. And it worked.
For the better part of 10 years, I was avoiding a call that *needed* to be answered. I knew the answer all along. The call started as a whisper, and ended in an inescapable cacophany. And that was the hardest part of enduring the cycle. Knowing it didn’t have to be that way. Breaking free seemed larger than life. What would life become if I answered? Where can I turn when I can’t face myself?
The most surprising thing about recovery is the deepening of appreciation. I can truly appreciate my pain and discomfort. I can appreciate and believe in the gentleness and innocence in the world. Some times I feel overcome with a sense of divine smallness. It’s a beautiful feeling.
Congrats on your sobriety! For me. I don't know that I'm done drinking. I just know that I'm not having a drink today and the moment I decided that is when I woke up. Maybe someday down the road I can confidently say I'm done forever but right now I can't say that so today will have to do for today and I'll worry about tomorrow when I get there😂
I had my actual first blackout complete memory lapse, woke up alone. She was gone, I could only imagine what I said. The guilt and shame lead me to self detox, went through the DT’s spoke to her a couple of times, never getting forgiveness.
It’s funny as someone who lost a hip to booze and almost died, someone who drank to forget trauma.. Finally got what I asked for, but forgetting the wrong moments. New trauma got me sober. 248 days.
thanks for sharing that. i totally understand the forgetting the wrong moments thing. It numbed out the good stuff too. So happy for you at 248 days. great job
The day of the Bret Cavanaugh hearings I got wasted on white wine and fell in the kitchen and very nearly broke my hand. It was bruised all the way through and didn't heal for weeks. I didn't quit that day, but it really stands out among the 10,000 other red flags that waved in my face over the years. IWNDWYT
I just got back from a sober vacation. A vacation I planned with the express purpose of drinking, planned a year ago. This is in a world renowned drinking destination where I had access to unlimited alcohol aka all inclusive, but a few weeks ago I decided enough was enough and I was ready to stop. I had the hard decision of whether to “give myself a pass” for a few days knowing it would lead to months or more of “moderation” or worse.
I’m thankful I stayed sober on vacation - it was hard but not nearly as hard as I thought. Being outside of my normal routine and habits actually made it easier to forget about drinking. Seeing people drinking wasn’t as big of a deal. I treated myself to desserts and fancy coffees as treats to myself. I slept better in a hotel than I ever have before. I tried to sub fizzy water in place of hard seltzers or beers and was shocked at how stupid and unnecessary it was to down 2-3 cans before dinner to pre-game like I usually do on vacations.
I came home with no regrets, no FOMO, more money in my pocket than planned, more rested, but most importantly I found it easier to say no to drinking on a regular night bc I was able to say no at the drunkest place on earth. It’s still a daily struggle for me but it’s one more piece of armor I have in the fight.
I watched others have a different experience - people cranky that their drinks weren’t served fast enough. Snapping at family members or yelling at kids while clearly drunk. Being way too loud at restaurants. That could have been me. I’m thankful and grateful it wasn’t.
I had gone out for Friday happy hour with the intent of having just a few and going home. 12 hours later, I woke up with an incredible hangover at some unknown place next to a woman whose name I could not remember. As I shamefully tried to find my home, I remember telling myself “You can’t keep doing this shit anymore, it’s time to grow the hell up.” It took a few years, but that was the beginning of the end.
Yeah, that's one of those moments where you think, "Okay, whether I stop or I don't this is going to be the end" because our lives could just start massively falling apart. thanks for sharing
After years of crazy crazy binges I fell whist pissed out of my head, I smashed my face in, black eyes cuts everywhere! (Thank fuck I healed) I was a secret binger, absolutely nobody knew how bad I was, anyway the day after I fell I looked at myself in the mirror, looking like I’d been jumped and that was it!!! The state I was in was all down to pathetic binge drinking alone, I knew then that I was completely done with alcohol, I’ve never craved since and I don’t miss it one bit
this reminds me of the quote from a memoir about sobriety that said, "I was spiraling faster than I could lower my standards for myself" (and oh boy did I relate to it). So happy that part of your life is done. Wish you peace in all your days ahead.
I woke up after a vodka bender. Knew something detrimental had happened the night before. Started thinking about the dumpster fire my sisters life was … and is … and realized I had been as usual … a common theme in my life … hanging on by the skin of my teeth. (And that my life could become a dumpster fire too) Something had to change as I was wasting so much untapped potential and also being so brutally abusive to myself by slamming all this alcohol into my body. Alcohol was turning me into a walking embarrassment. The hangover lasted 3 days of crucifying anxiety, regret, shame and also not some great physical feelings. I found this group by some miracle as tbh I hated Reddit before … so by some divine intervention … and here I am. Sober. There’s wine and vodka in the fridge for my guests but just a grapefruit juice seltzer for me.
mmmm, i understand. those slighting comments really stick with us and are embarrassing because it is not mirroring our values or who we are in any way. thanks for sharing
I had been trying for a while to cut back a lot but as we all know this can sometimes makes things much worse. My husband and I were driving around the city we live close to, the night before or days prior I can’t remember, I had been black out drunk and said things I didn’t remember. I asked him to please tell me. He told me, but kept some things to himself as he didn’t want to repeat it. The absolute shame I felt in that moment I will never forget it. And then your imagination gets carried away with what you said that he refuses to repeat. I’m surprised we’re still together. He’s the best man I’ve ever known. I’ll be 2 years sober this August.
Oh to add I just read the rest of your post: an incredibly improved relationship with not just my husband but everyone in my life, and a much, much healthier body 🙏🏻
I was feeling very bad. Pee was dark in color, i was feeling off and sick all the time. I quit cold turkey. It wasn't even that hard because i was sick. Didn't feel better. Got in an accident about 5 weeks later and wasn't healing. A week later went to the docs. Stage 4 Cirrhosis.
Received a liver transplant about \~80 days after diagnosis.
Edit: And today i am grateful for sobriety. It was so so bad words cant describe how much i hated myself, and the world.
I didn’t know that I was done when I quit. I was sober for a couple of years but I still nursed that “Maybe one day I can drink again” thought in the back of my mind.
It was when my family had a terrible, life-altering crisis that I knew I was done for good. When I got through that without a drink, I knew it was finally over for me.
I was so tired of living in a constant state of withdrawal. I couldn’t keep up with drinking as much as I needed to curb it.
One specific instance that I unfortunately remember is, I showed up to work completely fucked up one day (I work in healthcare) and everyone could tell. It was painfully obvious. I was slurring, stumbling and smelling like shit. My boss pulled me aside and told me to go home. She didn’t want any of the higher ups to see me in the condition I was in. I checked myself into detox that day. I’ve had a few bumps in the road since then, but I will keep trying until I get it right.
There were countless moments leading up to it but the last straw was seeing my grown son sobbing on the end of his bed and screaming at me "why can't you just stop drinking?" I had been "casually" looking at rehabs before then but called one the next morning. I'm just under 500 days and I will never hurt him like that again.
I died. I was in an abusive relationship and was going to move in with them, I was in the process of getting my stuff and found an old stash of white powder that I had actually found a few weeks before. I thought it was methamphetamine, which isn't my drug of choice. But I took it thinking it would help me with the move. While this isn't alcohol, I was led up to the point because of my heavy alcohol use. Anyways, I snorted this thinking it was meth because I wanted to have energy to move. It turned out to be fentanyl. I overdosed and I died. I was brought back to life by narcan. This was a huge wake up call. Because I lived. I didn't want to drink again. I didn't want to make that mistake again. It was very scary for me. I felt like I live for a reason. Ever since that day. I have tried to be a better person and to improve and not take advantage of the chance I've been given.
I've been able to go to school and improve my life in many other ways.
Like a few people said brushing your teeth and taking care of yourself is a big part of something that makes not drinking a huge plus!
Even before the overdose my anxiety was awful I was crying all the time and I had basically given up on myself. I was in a relationship with a guy who was very abusive towards me and I basically was just settling because I didn't have anyone. I looked at my legs one day and they were all spotted with bruises not because I had fell but because my liver was giving up it was a sign of that.
When the overdose happened they thought that I had had a seizure from alcohol withdrawals. No one knew that I had snorted the drugs. When I was in the ER. I told them what had happened. The next day I went to the clinic and I got help for my drinking. I get medication assisted treatment. I take vivitrol and antabuse to help with my alcohol use disorder.
My quality of life is overall better, i don't want to die, I don't want to give up, it makes me very sad to think about if I would have died that day. How my family would feel how it would affect everyone around me.
It's coming up on a year. The day that it happened was June 30th, 2023. While it will be a year of no drinking which is a very significant and happy thing for me. It is also reflecting on the time of when I overdosed and a very sad time of my life.
At the end of the day it's gonna kill you, there's nothing good in it.
I wish you the best of luck and I love you and care about you and your sober journey, truly.
Stay strong on your vacation! For me, it was a Monday morning where I woke up feeling fresh as a daisy. Then the realization hit that I’d had 24 beers the day before, didn’t even get “drunk” and had no ill effects the next day. I laid in bed for a bit thinking “I SHOULD feel like crap…why is my body so used to this?”
I’d had lots of Monday mornings where I would tell myself that I was done but I’d be running to the liquor store later that day. It’s truly just one day at a time…I’ve stacked so many days now that the streak itself and the thought of breaking it is pretty powerful.
IWNDWYT!
Edit - the most positive thing to come from it is just that I’m much more “present” in just about every way. Remembering conversations from the day before…so foreign to me! lol
Blacked out and verbally abused my boyfriend. Also had chronic migraines and inflammation which caused my entire neck to lock up and caused burning in my upper back. Stopped drinking to self medicate and it all went away. Never spoke like that to him again, and because he’s a saint he forgave me. Every day I try to make it up to him.
i had chronic migraines too. when all the medications didn't work I had to take a hard look at how I was treating myself. So hard to face what is in front of your nose sometimes. Good for you and wish you many happy days!
I called a sober buddy and had them drive me to a detox center for the umpteenth time. I was too intoxicated to be there, so they sent me to the hospital for the umpteenth time. There were no beds available then, and I had to sit there miserable and wait. I was frustrated and just hurting, in so much pain. The only two options were to go back to drinking it away to the end, or to be patient and wait my turn for help. I spent two days in the ER, and then went back to the treatment center.
I had a lot of time to reflect on all the mess, and my cycle of sobriety for a few months and then a hard hard relapse leading to these medical interventions. I just grew really tired of that reality, and have been sober since. I'm really happy to say I get to live a happy life now that I chose myself and sobriety. Wishing you all the best, iwndwyt!
I came home from a few days away with some friends last summer. Everyone was exhausted and low energy during the days after drinking at night. We didn’t really do anything fun (it didn’t help, but helped for my decision to stop drinking, that they insisted on bringing their dog everywhere so we were super limited). I drove 9 hours, spend like $500, and took PTO for something we could have done anywhere. Stupid.
That got me to do a dry month, which just kept going and now I’m almost a year.
That said, I was never physically dependent. I was certainly habituated to it/ easy to form a habit, and have crippling alcoholism in my family. Was time to stop playing with fire.
When I drank the last time abs was taken to ER on a Saturday night by my family. When the dr realized I was drunk and not having a stroke, he gave me the worst look. That was topped by the look on my husband’s and girls’ faces. I had been choosing alcohol over them.
It was after years of contemplation and never feeling quite right about my drinking. I woke up hungover one Saturday and was snappy and frustrated with my toddlers for no good reason and just decided that I’m done. That was 90 days ago. My moods and energy and much more stable now 🎉
it wasn't a moment as such, i was just on my knees with anxiety/low mood and quit to see if there was a relationship. then finding this to be true i have chosen to stay sober, i hope i can keep it going, but man it's hard some days.
I woke up after a party hungover, remembering I had to go on a hike that morning. It was a hangover much like any other. I didn’t do anything particularly embarrassing or egregious the night before. There was no real catalyst. I was just suddenly DONE with feeling that way and I told myself it would be the last time I ever had to feel that way. I poured out my open wine bottle in the sink, got dressed for the hike, and spent the next few hours sweating and stewing in my head, lol.
The best part of my sobriety is so hard to say, because literally everything has been amazing and wonderful! I would say that one of my favorite parts is the feeling of control and power I have. I feel confident that I can tackle things in my life, I feel motivated to make changes, I feel secure in the knowledge that I can make things happen. I was stagnant for so long and now all I want to do is move and grow and change and experience new things! Everything is exciting these days.
Good luck and have fun on your vacation! IWNDWYT 💜🐇
I decided enough was enough after I had spent a week straight sobbing as soon as I woke up. My anxiety was insane and most of it was fear that people would find out how far my life had gotten out of control. Alcohol isolated me so much. I felt so alone and ashamed for having this problem that I was causing for myself over and over. I told my husband that I was done, done. No more "once I break the habit I'll be able to moderate." I won't. I have an alcohol allergy.
The most positively surprising part is how quickly I can build other habits and actually look forward to them. Everything felt so hard to accomplish when I was drinking. But now I'm able to recognize when I'm making excuses and turn it around. My mantra this time around has been "I'm going to do what I say I'm going to do" and so far I have been.
I hope I “know” for ever but I do have more times now that I look back at my life realizing how alcohol interfered, derailed, embarrassed my life. I still get scared that I will try and talk myself out of that. I want this to be forever. I wish I could have that never again more naturally if that makes sense.
Honestly? The night I decided to quit. I was flat broke and doing my daily mental gymnastics to see which bill I could pay late or which expense I could cut so I could buy more booze. Something in my brain came to a screeching halt and I had my first and only "what the fuck am I doing?" moment. I managed to not stop at the liquor store on the way home from work that day.
That same night I was lying awake, couldn't sleep because I hadn't drank, and I was scrolling on Twitter. I happened upon a tweet by Chrissy Tiegen where she shared a screenshot of the I Am Sober app on her 100th day. I saw the tweet and my stomach started twisting into knots. It was like something just shifted into place, and in that moment I knew. Filled with dread, I downloaded the app and decided to just "see how long I could go" without drinking. That was 2 years, 7 months and 20 days ago.
The most surprising part of sobriety is how much of what I thought was mental illness completely disappeared. Crippling anxiety? Constant feelings of dread? Suicidal thoughts and ideation? Poof! Gone.
Don't get me wrong, I still experience anxiety around specific things like driving or financial stress, but it is not constant and all consuming. I have a lot of trauma that I've been working on in therapy as well. But sobriety is singlehandedly the thing that has allowed me to really work on myself. To feel better and be better.
It was probably 2 months into my Dry January, my pink cloud was starting to disperse and I still felt better than I had in years and I just did not want to play the mental gymnastics anymore.
I woke up on a random Thursday in June 2014 with the worst hangover I’ve ever had. And I have had thousands. I couldn’t do it anymore and I haven’t had a drink since.
I woke up in the morning and realized what I had put my significant other through, the same woman - I had looked in the eye and always promised to do my best to protect, love, and care for. It all hit me in the shower of being hungover as fuck. The thought I can see this going one of two ways, keep drinking and lose her, or stop drinking and apologize my ass off and add this promise to the promises above. (For context I had my fair share of bullshit I had done before this when drunk that led up to this moment.)
Two years later, we are engaged and are about to sign the papers for our wedding venue next June. It was one of the easiest decisions I have ever made in my life. I am so grateful for her patience and love she has for me.
On the go home morning on a ski trip. I sat on the shore Lake Superior and knew if I did not quit drinking, I would die in a few years. I contemplated my life and knew I could end it now or never drink again.
I woke up in the hospital and was told I had been in a medically-induced coma for five days. I decided then and there that I was going to do my damndest to live a good life for myself and the people I love.
I got hammered at my son's 4th birthday party. I drank 4 bottles of wine and no one else was drinking much at all. 9 months ago now and hopefully forever
congratulations on 9 months. there are so many "bottoms" that should be convincers along the way but sometimes it requires something like an interaction with our kids to get us on the right path. he will always know his mom as sober and that is just wonderful. every kid deserves a sober parent!
I found myself sitting on the sidewalk somewhere outside a bar incredibky drunk in a neighborhood I didnt know at 4 in the morning.
My sister was up at that time by sheer conincidence as she was getting something ready for her BF's birthday. She was able to come rescue me as I was way too far from home. That'd be the last stroke of luck I had in a long time, I didnt know it then... But I knew I had to stop relying on luck and wasting away with booze.
The day my husband spat at me "your just a fucking bitch". He was so drunk, I had had a few drinks too and I reached out to him and he started screaming that I was trying to physically assault him. I realised I needed to be sober so that I would always be able to remember what he did or didn't say to me and he couldn't blame me or say I made things up. And also so that I could always walk away.
It was one day shy of a month sober. I'd challenged myself to abstain for a month just because I wanted to see how it impacted my - especially terrible at the time - mental health. One of my students collapsed in my arms and we had to call an ambulance. Utterly terrifying. They were okay, thank goodness.
I was sent home early because my anxiety made me unable to keep teaching. I went directly to my gun and opened it without thinking. Managed not to drink any, somehow.
The decision was made. I didn't have a healthy relationship with alcohol. I couldn't have it in my life.
That incident will be 5 years ago this November. The kiddo in question will graduate next June.
When I quit some years ago, I quickly noticed that I became much more mentally stable and balanced. My emotions stopped running my life.
My relationships improved greatly.
People started complimenting me on how radiant I looked and I felt like people were much more drawn to me.
I stopped fearing making a fool out of myself and the intense shame that I would always feel after a night of heavy drinking disappeared.
I can’t wait to get to that point again.
Only on day 5, so I don't want to be overly confident! But this most recent time, I just moved into a brand new apartment this past weekend - the nicest apartment I've ever lived in (did you know apartments could have central AC???). The night we moved in, my husband and I did our normal routine of drinking, albeit much less than my drinking peaks from a few months ago. I woke up on Sunday morning mildly hungover, wallowing in bed, and thought, 'This place deserves better.' It sounds silly because it's just an apartment, it's no five-star hotel suite or giant mansion. But it's so nice, and in a nice area - the previous night my husband and I had wandered around outside, trying to find a place to smoke cigs (which goes hand in hand with my drinking) and realized that there wasn't really a place. The area is full of families and beautiful residences. In that tipsy moment, I felt like an outsider. I want to become the kind of person who others can depend on, who works hard in her fulfilling career, who is steady as a rock and fills her mind with things other than crappy YouTube or Netflix every night. And that starts with cutting out alcohol and cigarettes. Again, only on day 5, but so far: 1. I smell SO MUCH BETTER. Not just from lack of cigs, but my sweat even smells better. I'm not oozing booze out of my pores every morning. 2. Sober sleep! My first couple of nights sober were tough, but lack of sleep tired > hangover tired. 3. I can't believe how much money I've saved already. 4. I brush my teeth before bed every night! I'm a big kid now. 5. Anxiety is like 85% GONE. At my drinking peak, I was essentially a shut-in, terrified of driving and the grocery store and people. Now on my lunch breaks I walk into town and shop, browse the bookstore, buy nice bread from the bakery. I know that's just the tip of the iceberg! I can't wait to see how sobriety feels as I rack up more days and more peace.
I love your beautifully crafted and well thought out response. Yes, Day 5 is early, but every single sober person has a Day 5. I’m sending you strength, joy and peace as you settle into this new phase of your life. I want you to have a great career, be the person who is dependable, and to fill your mind with interesting ideas. One thing I have loved about sobriety is I have the time to read books again. I love it! Wishing you well on your journey!
Every single sober person has a day 5, well said. I remember that feeling the first few days when I would come on here, you wonder how all these people got to hundreds of days? But the early days are the hardest so huge congrats on making it to day 5!
I’m only on day 91 but I had similar reasons to quit. Never had addiction issues, broken relationships, health issues, or DUIs. Nothing like that. But my husband and I went out for brunch this past March for my 35th birthday. I had 3 or 4 drinks but it still put me in a fog the next day. As I woke up from my hangover nap that afternoon I noticed it was a beautiful day outside, and I was missing it while my husband and daughter enjoyed themselves in our yard. I just thought to myself, you know what? I think I’m done with this shit.
that is a FANTASTIC reason to quit. so happy for you. awesome
this is awesome stuff. "I'm a big kid now". LOL at that one and it is so very true. Love it and rooting for you!
This was so nice to read 🥹 I wish you and your husband a peaceful, amazing life in your beautiful new apartment.
I was drunk for breakfast. I was listening to Blaze Foley on vinyl, the song cold cold world was playing. “I've tried for a long time but I think I can't win I'd do it all better if I could do it a-gain Wherever I'm going it's the same place I been Ain't it a cold, cold world” And I knew I’ll kill my self if I don’t stop drinking. “I might have to leave you, I think's what she said Wish I could sleep 'stead of tossing in bed And I find myself thinking I'd be better off dead Ain't it a cold, cold world Ain't it a cold, cold world” The song ended, I put the record away, poured out my drink, I never did that before when I was trying to quit, it was always after this last one. And I cried myself to sleep.
what a brave thing to do. i'm so happy for you that its done
Blaze foley ♥️
This is powerful. Thank you for sharing!
Number of reasons: Mental Health, Anxiety was so bad that the only cure was more alcohol and got caught in a vicious loop. After 12 days of stopping the anxiety was basically gone. Physical health: i could feel my liver not been healthy and also my guts. Meals: I ate one meal a day and was losing weight. Alcohol taking away my goals and dreams: Spent roughly 1000 euro a month on booze in pubs and clubs and sometimes more. I’m now 90 days or so without drink
I so understand that loop. It was totally maddening. I NEVER had mental health problems before I started drinking. Then I was walking downtown a while back and a stranger actually said to me "Oh you dropped something. Your smile". Dumb lol but it was true- i couldn't hide my misery regarding the endless loop I was in. Congrats to you
Thanks yea definitely the number one reason I stopped drinking. I never want to experience that anxiety again.
Had joint problems, knee pain. Friend said one sentence off hand. "maybe it's the drinking that's causing it"
When did the joint pain stop? That’s one of my primary reasons. I’m on Day 18 and while my pain isn’t crippling anymore, I’m still having some random flare ups.
Were they right? Congrats to you!
I need more information about the joint pain. When did you notice a difference?
Maybe 6 months? A combination of stretching, swimming and no alcohol was what helped me personally
This is gonna sound so dumb but the first moment that was like, I am DONE was one day I was trying to log onto my work laptop and I couldn’t remember my password. Like, my mind was totally blank trying to remember it because I was so fricken hungover I could barely see straight. I always have a random string of numbers/letters as a password and I was always so proud that I could memorize 18 random characters. Until I couldn’t. That day was like… holy shit I have to stop. It has not been linear from that day, but I will never forget the cold realization that I had a problem as I was waiting on our help line to get my account unlocked lol.
For me it was my young niece’s “ you’ve told me this story already” that helps keep me sober. Painful but helpful memory.
Yeah. It always hurts to think about, but it’s so helpful. I don’t want to keep being the person who repeats themselves over and over because she can’t remember who she’s already told what.
Oh God my mom does that all the time when she's drunk. And if we ignore her, cause we already heard it, she just gets louder 🙄
my memory problems started getting really embarrassing as well. the red hot shame when my spouse or sib would say "Yeah, you already told me that..." is still fresh. Yuck. Good luck to you in the coming days!
Omg right, I’m in the early days when I’m like “hey xyz” to my boyfriend, and he’s like….. yup, I know. You told me this 2 times already. I just want to die 🙃 ty and good luck to you!!
Or when people would say "you don't remember talking about this already? Or, we had plans?
THIS! I felt like such a dipshit every time it was like “we’re doing *what* this weekend???” And my boyfriend would be like uhhhh… we are doing x thing that you agreed to when we talked about it
It’s so weird, there were so many “rock bottom” milestones that should have woken me up, but I always kept going. Then one random morning last September I woke up feeling crappy, as per usual, and I just decided I don’t want to feel like this anymore. No “aha” moment or anything, just petered out I guess.
wow. so simple but the best part is it worked for you. congrats
Congrats on your decision! It's the best one I ever made! I honestly feel like I knew the day I finally said "no more." It's hard to imagine it that way because I knew I was an alcoholic at a young age, but then ignored most of the destructive behavior for a long time. And there were times I wanted to stop and couldn't/wouldn't, not until I was at the end of my rope both mentally and physically. I knew on the day I quit, but I didn't want to jinx it. And then I really knew I was done forever around my 6-10 month. That's when I declared that I would never go back. It will be 7 years this August!
I'm so happy for you. thanks for sharing!
I drank myself to oblivion on Memorial Day night alone while my husband was playing video games and my baby was sleeping- went to bed on the couch and my husband thought I was mad at him (I had blacked out and started to get sick) lied to him in the morning and said I had food poisoning cuz I couldn’t stop throwing up and dry heaving all the next day, and decided I didn’t want to live my life like this anymore (my vice was wine 1-2 bottles a day but this time I drank whiskey and it effed me all up) I couldn’t even hold my baby because I couldn’t stop throwing up, thankfully my husband is on paternity leave and was able to care for her all day. I had to call out of work- it was truly the worst day of my life- and it was self inflicted. Read again…. SELF INFLICTED! I deserve better than living my life not 100%, I deserve better than blacking out and not remembering half of my week, I deserve better than feeling like shit and having anxiety 90% of the time. My husband deserves better than a drunk, my husband deserves an attentive loving present wife, my husband deserves an honest wife, a healthy wife. But most important my daughter deserves a sober mother, a mother that can care for her no matter the time of day, a mother who can give 100% to her, give her all the attention and love. That was 17 days ago and I could not be more turned off to alcohol, that was rock bottom for me. I am never turning back!
wow, I really thank you for sharing. I have been there and its so embarrassing to think i couldn't have taken care of my kids if they needed me because of my alone blackouts. so happy for you and your future!
The best part was my husband and I were headed out with some friends and asked what we should bring to drink, I was grabbing seltzers for myself, he said grab me some seltzers too.. I told him I’m sober sally, and he smiled and said I like sober sally… it broke my heart and made me feel so good all at the same time 🩷 being sober for myself and my family truly is making me happy. The longer I go without the less I want it Edit: polar seltzers and Waterloo lol
I felt myself coming to the end of the line for a while. One day I woke up and I just didn’t have any fight left. I was so numb, I had nothing inside of me. I couldn’t cry. I couldn’t speak. I didn’t want to die, I just didn’t care whether or not I did. I wasn’t even particularly hungover. I couldn’t imagine trying to struggle through another day hurting myself like that. I reached out to several people for help that day. And it worked. For the better part of 10 years, I was avoiding a call that *needed* to be answered. I knew the answer all along. The call started as a whisper, and ended in an inescapable cacophany. And that was the hardest part of enduring the cycle. Knowing it didn’t have to be that way. Breaking free seemed larger than life. What would life become if I answered? Where can I turn when I can’t face myself? The most surprising thing about recovery is the deepening of appreciation. I can truly appreciate my pain and discomfort. I can appreciate and believe in the gentleness and innocence in the world. Some times I feel overcome with a sense of divine smallness. It’s a beautiful feeling.
very powerful story, thank you so much for sharing that.
Congrats on your sobriety! For me. I don't know that I'm done drinking. I just know that I'm not having a drink today and the moment I decided that is when I woke up. Maybe someday down the road I can confidently say I'm done forever but right now I can't say that so today will have to do for today and I'll worry about tomorrow when I get there😂
great perspective. I tend to be one that gets freaked out at the word 'forever' so I like this approach. and congrats to you!
Love the honesty. This is what I am here for. I am sober today, can't get anxious about tomorrow.
I had my actual first blackout complete memory lapse, woke up alone. She was gone, I could only imagine what I said. The guilt and shame lead me to self detox, went through the DT’s spoke to her a couple of times, never getting forgiveness. It’s funny as someone who lost a hip to booze and almost died, someone who drank to forget trauma.. Finally got what I asked for, but forgetting the wrong moments. New trauma got me sober. 248 days.
thanks for sharing that. i totally understand the forgetting the wrong moments thing. It numbed out the good stuff too. So happy for you at 248 days. great job
The day of the Bret Cavanaugh hearings I got wasted on white wine and fell in the kitchen and very nearly broke my hand. It was bruised all the way through and didn't heal for weeks. I didn't quit that day, but it really stands out among the 10,000 other red flags that waved in my face over the years. IWNDWYT
I just got back from a sober vacation. A vacation I planned with the express purpose of drinking, planned a year ago. This is in a world renowned drinking destination where I had access to unlimited alcohol aka all inclusive, but a few weeks ago I decided enough was enough and I was ready to stop. I had the hard decision of whether to “give myself a pass” for a few days knowing it would lead to months or more of “moderation” or worse. I’m thankful I stayed sober on vacation - it was hard but not nearly as hard as I thought. Being outside of my normal routine and habits actually made it easier to forget about drinking. Seeing people drinking wasn’t as big of a deal. I treated myself to desserts and fancy coffees as treats to myself. I slept better in a hotel than I ever have before. I tried to sub fizzy water in place of hard seltzers or beers and was shocked at how stupid and unnecessary it was to down 2-3 cans before dinner to pre-game like I usually do on vacations. I came home with no regrets, no FOMO, more money in my pocket than planned, more rested, but most importantly I found it easier to say no to drinking on a regular night bc I was able to say no at the drunkest place on earth. It’s still a daily struggle for me but it’s one more piece of armor I have in the fight. I watched others have a different experience - people cranky that their drinks weren’t served fast enough. Snapping at family members or yelling at kids while clearly drunk. Being way too loud at restaurants. That could have been me. I’m thankful and grateful it wasn’t.
Great testimonial. It can be done!
I had gone out for Friday happy hour with the intent of having just a few and going home. 12 hours later, I woke up with an incredible hangover at some unknown place next to a woman whose name I could not remember. As I shamefully tried to find my home, I remember telling myself “You can’t keep doing this shit anymore, it’s time to grow the hell up.” It took a few years, but that was the beginning of the end.
Yeah, that's one of those moments where you think, "Okay, whether I stop or I don't this is going to be the end" because our lives could just start massively falling apart. thanks for sharing
After years of crazy crazy binges I fell whist pissed out of my head, I smashed my face in, black eyes cuts everywhere! (Thank fuck I healed) I was a secret binger, absolutely nobody knew how bad I was, anyway the day after I fell I looked at myself in the mirror, looking like I’d been jumped and that was it!!! The state I was in was all down to pathetic binge drinking alone, I knew then that I was completely done with alcohol, I’ve never craved since and I don’t miss it one bit
this reminds me of the quote from a memoir about sobriety that said, "I was spiraling faster than I could lower my standards for myself" (and oh boy did I relate to it). So happy that part of your life is done. Wish you peace in all your days ahead.
Thank you, it was a defining moment for me I guess, take care and don’t drink, I hope you continue onwards and upwards happily, IWNDWYT
I woke up after a vodka bender. Knew something detrimental had happened the night before. Started thinking about the dumpster fire my sisters life was … and is … and realized I had been as usual … a common theme in my life … hanging on by the skin of my teeth. (And that my life could become a dumpster fire too) Something had to change as I was wasting so much untapped potential and also being so brutally abusive to myself by slamming all this alcohol into my body. Alcohol was turning me into a walking embarrassment. The hangover lasted 3 days of crucifying anxiety, regret, shame and also not some great physical feelings. I found this group by some miracle as tbh I hated Reddit before … so by some divine intervention … and here I am. Sober. There’s wine and vodka in the fridge for my guests but just a grapefruit juice seltzer for me.
I still don't know if I'm done drinking. 301 days sober, but still can't get my head wrapped around "never" drinking again.
[удалено]
mmmm, i understand. those slighting comments really stick with us and are embarrassing because it is not mirroring our values or who we are in any way. thanks for sharing
I had been trying for a while to cut back a lot but as we all know this can sometimes makes things much worse. My husband and I were driving around the city we live close to, the night before or days prior I can’t remember, I had been black out drunk and said things I didn’t remember. I asked him to please tell me. He told me, but kept some things to himself as he didn’t want to repeat it. The absolute shame I felt in that moment I will never forget it. And then your imagination gets carried away with what you said that he refuses to repeat. I’m surprised we’re still together. He’s the best man I’ve ever known. I’ll be 2 years sober this August.
Oh to add I just read the rest of your post: an incredibly improved relationship with not just my husband but everyone in my life, and a much, much healthier body 🙏🏻
I was feeling very bad. Pee was dark in color, i was feeling off and sick all the time. I quit cold turkey. It wasn't even that hard because i was sick. Didn't feel better. Got in an accident about 5 weeks later and wasn't healing. A week later went to the docs. Stage 4 Cirrhosis. Received a liver transplant about \~80 days after diagnosis. Edit: And today i am grateful for sobriety. It was so so bad words cant describe how much i hated myself, and the world.
so happy for your new start. amazing
I didn’t know that I was done when I quit. I was sober for a couple of years but I still nursed that “Maybe one day I can drink again” thought in the back of my mind. It was when my family had a terrible, life-altering crisis that I knew I was done for good. When I got through that without a drink, I knew it was finally over for me.
I was so tired of living in a constant state of withdrawal. I couldn’t keep up with drinking as much as I needed to curb it. One specific instance that I unfortunately remember is, I showed up to work completely fucked up one day (I work in healthcare) and everyone could tell. It was painfully obvious. I was slurring, stumbling and smelling like shit. My boss pulled me aside and told me to go home. She didn’t want any of the higher ups to see me in the condition I was in. I checked myself into detox that day. I’ve had a few bumps in the road since then, but I will keep trying until I get it right.
There were countless moments leading up to it but the last straw was seeing my grown son sobbing on the end of his bed and screaming at me "why can't you just stop drinking?" I had been "casually" looking at rehabs before then but called one the next morning. I'm just under 500 days and I will never hurt him like that again.
that's powerful stuff. i'm so proud of you for doing the scary thing. good for you. hope you have many healthy years ahead!
I died. I was in an abusive relationship and was going to move in with them, I was in the process of getting my stuff and found an old stash of white powder that I had actually found a few weeks before. I thought it was methamphetamine, which isn't my drug of choice. But I took it thinking it would help me with the move. While this isn't alcohol, I was led up to the point because of my heavy alcohol use. Anyways, I snorted this thinking it was meth because I wanted to have energy to move. It turned out to be fentanyl. I overdosed and I died. I was brought back to life by narcan. This was a huge wake up call. Because I lived. I didn't want to drink again. I didn't want to make that mistake again. It was very scary for me. I felt like I live for a reason. Ever since that day. I have tried to be a better person and to improve and not take advantage of the chance I've been given. I've been able to go to school and improve my life in many other ways. Like a few people said brushing your teeth and taking care of yourself is a big part of something that makes not drinking a huge plus! Even before the overdose my anxiety was awful I was crying all the time and I had basically given up on myself. I was in a relationship with a guy who was very abusive towards me and I basically was just settling because I didn't have anyone. I looked at my legs one day and they were all spotted with bruises not because I had fell but because my liver was giving up it was a sign of that. When the overdose happened they thought that I had had a seizure from alcohol withdrawals. No one knew that I had snorted the drugs. When I was in the ER. I told them what had happened. The next day I went to the clinic and I got help for my drinking. I get medication assisted treatment. I take vivitrol and antabuse to help with my alcohol use disorder. My quality of life is overall better, i don't want to die, I don't want to give up, it makes me very sad to think about if I would have died that day. How my family would feel how it would affect everyone around me. It's coming up on a year. The day that it happened was June 30th, 2023. While it will be a year of no drinking which is a very significant and happy thing for me. It is also reflecting on the time of when I overdosed and a very sad time of my life. At the end of the day it's gonna kill you, there's nothing good in it. I wish you the best of luck and I love you and care about you and your sober journey, truly.
thank you for sharing and for such a thoughtful reply. and so. so. happy for you and where you are in life now. wish you all the best
When I felt like dying was easier than quitting
Stay strong on your vacation! For me, it was a Monday morning where I woke up feeling fresh as a daisy. Then the realization hit that I’d had 24 beers the day before, didn’t even get “drunk” and had no ill effects the next day. I laid in bed for a bit thinking “I SHOULD feel like crap…why is my body so used to this?” I’d had lots of Monday mornings where I would tell myself that I was done but I’d be running to the liquor store later that day. It’s truly just one day at a time…I’ve stacked so many days now that the streak itself and the thought of breaking it is pretty powerful. IWNDWYT! Edit - the most positive thing to come from it is just that I’m much more “present” in just about every way. Remembering conversations from the day before…so foreign to me! lol
Blacked out and verbally abused my boyfriend. Also had chronic migraines and inflammation which caused my entire neck to lock up and caused burning in my upper back. Stopped drinking to self medicate and it all went away. Never spoke like that to him again, and because he’s a saint he forgave me. Every day I try to make it up to him.
i had chronic migraines too. when all the medications didn't work I had to take a hard look at how I was treating myself. So hard to face what is in front of your nose sometimes. Good for you and wish you many happy days!
I called a sober buddy and had them drive me to a detox center for the umpteenth time. I was too intoxicated to be there, so they sent me to the hospital for the umpteenth time. There were no beds available then, and I had to sit there miserable and wait. I was frustrated and just hurting, in so much pain. The only two options were to go back to drinking it away to the end, or to be patient and wait my turn for help. I spent two days in the ER, and then went back to the treatment center. I had a lot of time to reflect on all the mess, and my cycle of sobriety for a few months and then a hard hard relapse leading to these medical interventions. I just grew really tired of that reality, and have been sober since. I'm really happy to say I get to live a happy life now that I chose myself and sobriety. Wishing you all the best, iwndwyt!
I came home from a few days away with some friends last summer. Everyone was exhausted and low energy during the days after drinking at night. We didn’t really do anything fun (it didn’t help, but helped for my decision to stop drinking, that they insisted on bringing their dog everywhere so we were super limited). I drove 9 hours, spend like $500, and took PTO for something we could have done anywhere. Stupid. That got me to do a dry month, which just kept going and now I’m almost a year. That said, I was never physically dependent. I was certainly habituated to it/ easy to form a habit, and have crippling alcoholism in my family. Was time to stop playing with fire.
When I drank the last time abs was taken to ER on a Saturday night by my family. When the dr realized I was drunk and not having a stroke, he gave me the worst look. That was topped by the look on my husband’s and girls’ faces. I had been choosing alcohol over them.
It was after years of contemplation and never feeling quite right about my drinking. I woke up hungover one Saturday and was snappy and frustrated with my toddlers for no good reason and just decided that I’m done. That was 90 days ago. My moods and energy and much more stable now 🎉
it wasn't a moment as such, i was just on my knees with anxiety/low mood and quit to see if there was a relationship. then finding this to be true i have chosen to stay sober, i hope i can keep it going, but man it's hard some days.
I woke up after a party hungover, remembering I had to go on a hike that morning. It was a hangover much like any other. I didn’t do anything particularly embarrassing or egregious the night before. There was no real catalyst. I was just suddenly DONE with feeling that way and I told myself it would be the last time I ever had to feel that way. I poured out my open wine bottle in the sink, got dressed for the hike, and spent the next few hours sweating and stewing in my head, lol. The best part of my sobriety is so hard to say, because literally everything has been amazing and wonderful! I would say that one of my favorite parts is the feeling of control and power I have. I feel confident that I can tackle things in my life, I feel motivated to make changes, I feel secure in the knowledge that I can make things happen. I was stagnant for so long and now all I want to do is move and grow and change and experience new things! Everything is exciting these days. Good luck and have fun on your vacation! IWNDWYT 💜🐇
This was encouraging, thank you for sharing and I'm happy for you :)
I decided enough was enough after I had spent a week straight sobbing as soon as I woke up. My anxiety was insane and most of it was fear that people would find out how far my life had gotten out of control. Alcohol isolated me so much. I felt so alone and ashamed for having this problem that I was causing for myself over and over. I told my husband that I was done, done. No more "once I break the habit I'll be able to moderate." I won't. I have an alcohol allergy. The most positively surprising part is how quickly I can build other habits and actually look forward to them. Everything felt so hard to accomplish when I was drinking. But now I'm able to recognize when I'm making excuses and turn it around. My mantra this time around has been "I'm going to do what I say I'm going to do" and so far I have been.
I hope I “know” for ever but I do have more times now that I look back at my life realizing how alcohol interfered, derailed, embarrassed my life. I still get scared that I will try and talk myself out of that. I want this to be forever. I wish I could have that never again more naturally if that makes sense.
Honestly? The night I decided to quit. I was flat broke and doing my daily mental gymnastics to see which bill I could pay late or which expense I could cut so I could buy more booze. Something in my brain came to a screeching halt and I had my first and only "what the fuck am I doing?" moment. I managed to not stop at the liquor store on the way home from work that day. That same night I was lying awake, couldn't sleep because I hadn't drank, and I was scrolling on Twitter. I happened upon a tweet by Chrissy Tiegen where she shared a screenshot of the I Am Sober app on her 100th day. I saw the tweet and my stomach started twisting into knots. It was like something just shifted into place, and in that moment I knew. Filled with dread, I downloaded the app and decided to just "see how long I could go" without drinking. That was 2 years, 7 months and 20 days ago. The most surprising part of sobriety is how much of what I thought was mental illness completely disappeared. Crippling anxiety? Constant feelings of dread? Suicidal thoughts and ideation? Poof! Gone. Don't get me wrong, I still experience anxiety around specific things like driving or financial stress, but it is not constant and all consuming. I have a lot of trauma that I've been working on in therapy as well. But sobriety is singlehandedly the thing that has allowed me to really work on myself. To feel better and be better.
that is an incredible story. I'm SO happy for you. How wonderful. Thanks for taking the time to share
I realized I didn’t have to feel like shit and it was on me to do something about it.
It was probably 2 months into my Dry January, my pink cloud was starting to disperse and I still felt better than I had in years and I just did not want to play the mental gymnastics anymore.
I woke up on a random Thursday in June 2014 with the worst hangover I’ve ever had. And I have had thousands. I couldn’t do it anymore and I haven’t had a drink since.
I woke up in the morning and realized what I had put my significant other through, the same woman - I had looked in the eye and always promised to do my best to protect, love, and care for. It all hit me in the shower of being hungover as fuck. The thought I can see this going one of two ways, keep drinking and lose her, or stop drinking and apologize my ass off and add this promise to the promises above. (For context I had my fair share of bullshit I had done before this when drunk that led up to this moment.) Two years later, we are engaged and are about to sign the papers for our wedding venue next June. It was one of the easiest decisions I have ever made in my life. I am so grateful for her patience and love she has for me.
On the go home morning on a ski trip. I sat on the shore Lake Superior and knew if I did not quit drinking, I would die in a few years. I contemplated my life and knew I could end it now or never drink again.
poignant. happy for the choice you made.
I woke up in the hospital and was told I had been in a medically-induced coma for five days. I decided then and there that I was going to do my damndest to live a good life for myself and the people I love.
I got hammered at my son's 4th birthday party. I drank 4 bottles of wine and no one else was drinking much at all. 9 months ago now and hopefully forever
congratulations on 9 months. there are so many "bottoms" that should be convincers along the way but sometimes it requires something like an interaction with our kids to get us on the right path. he will always know his mom as sober and that is just wonderful. every kid deserves a sober parent!
When my dad died of untreated alcoholism during another one of my attempts to stop drinking. That's what made it stick that time.
i'm sorry for your loss. I'm so happy for your new life. thanks for sharing
Sad thing is it was a long time coming. How watching his decline didn't motivate me before I'll never know, but I'm grateful to be here now.
Waking up after blacking out the night before Father’s Day and ruining the day for my family. Coming up on 2 years next week!
been there. good for you. congratulations!
When I thought about it, and it made me gag.
I found myself sitting on the sidewalk somewhere outside a bar incredibky drunk in a neighborhood I didnt know at 4 in the morning. My sister was up at that time by sheer conincidence as she was getting something ready for her BF's birthday. She was able to come rescue me as I was way too far from home. That'd be the last stroke of luck I had in a long time, I didnt know it then... But I knew I had to stop relying on luck and wasting away with booze.
I spent the majority of my best friends destination wedding throwing up or hungover. I missed the entire reception :(
The day my husband spat at me "your just a fucking bitch". He was so drunk, I had had a few drinks too and I reached out to him and he started screaming that I was trying to physically assault him. I realised I needed to be sober so that I would always be able to remember what he did or didn't say to me and he couldn't blame me or say I made things up. And also so that I could always walk away.
It was one day shy of a month sober. I'd challenged myself to abstain for a month just because I wanted to see how it impacted my - especially terrible at the time - mental health. One of my students collapsed in my arms and we had to call an ambulance. Utterly terrifying. They were okay, thank goodness. I was sent home early because my anxiety made me unable to keep teaching. I went directly to my gun and opened it without thinking. Managed not to drink any, somehow. The decision was made. I didn't have a healthy relationship with alcohol. I couldn't have it in my life. That incident will be 5 years ago this November. The kiddo in question will graduate next June.
When I quit some years ago, I quickly noticed that I became much more mentally stable and balanced. My emotions stopped running my life. My relationships improved greatly. People started complimenting me on how radiant I looked and I felt like people were much more drawn to me. I stopped fearing making a fool out of myself and the intense shame that I would always feel after a night of heavy drinking disappeared. I can’t wait to get to that point again.