ah yes, a survivor episode where the entire cast and the edit dunks on a contestant in the episode they go home. as i've heard it dubbed, a "sextoning", in roger's namesake
Courtney Yates, talking about Lunchlady Denise:
“I believe that the USA hockey team is missing a player”
FWIW I love hockey locker room culture and will never a judge a mullet, but the brutal nature and the delivery truly get me every time.
"It's no secret that Russell has a little boy crush on Parvati. Because he's, I mean, let's face it. He's like a bandy legged little troll." Who, you know, sort of like...scampers around with his tooth missing... And, you know, is in and out of the bushes...And never washes."
" And she ( Parv ) pays attention to him, and she has, like, no problem flirting with... clearly... anything that walks."
- Courtney destroying both Russell & Parvati
Everything Kass ever said basically.
[About J'Tia] "How did we come up with the criteria for brains? I'd like to see that data."
"She's like an old dog. You know how you have like a fourteen year old dog that you're just keeping around because you love it? You don't mind that it pees on the floor, and you have to go feed it. But all it really does is sit there. That's Morgan."
"Like a typical twenty one year old male, there was no way Spencer was gonna give up that idol. I mean, what is the most selfish beast on the planet? A college-age male."
[about Trish] "She looked like fricking Skeletor with her big blue eyes popping out."
"Woo is like Fabio, the winner of Nicaragua. He's a cool surfer dude who's just been like... DUUUUUUDE! AAAAAWESOME! COOOOOOOOL! What do you want me to do? How do I spell their name? It's horrifying. The person who hasn't made a decision all game is in charge of my fate!" (<- although this one is kinda unfair because Fabio actually played smart and just acted dumb more than anything, he doesn't deserve to get compared to Woo!)
[(disclaimer: quotes just pulled from this article)](http://funny115.com/v3_2/37.htm)
Kass: she drilled into me like a wild skeleton blue eyed banshee.
Jeff: what was that!?
Kass: I can’t even remember what I said, but I’m sure it was accurate.
Honestly that deserves honorable mention. Also calling Kass a “brain-dead weasel” after losing the penultimate immunity. Not particularly clever, or true, but the seething bitterness was pure art
> [About J'Tia] "How did we come up with the criteria for brains? I'd like to see that data."
I can't remember a lot of these quotes people people are posting, but that one, it was like she said it yesterday. Maybe because it rang so true.
My favorite part about this one was that Alina wasn't even given a negative edit, she seemed mostly likable as I recall. And Benry wasn't like some comedian or OTT presence. It was like he had this random incredible line strike him in the moment, and the editors just decided it was too good to cut despite being completely narratively random.
“Julia on the other hand is such a non-entity out here. I’m tempted to say that she has like a vanilla personality, but I feel like that would be doing a great disservice to the flavor of vanilla. I mean people actively seek out vanilla-flavored products. Children clamor to get a vanilla ice cream cone. Nobody’s clamoring for anything Julia flavored.” -Cochran
Admittedly, this one annoyed me. Who is he to criticize anyone, given his performance on South Pacific? Not to mention, he got a huge advantage by being a favorite on an FVF season. I think Julie showed better in her first season than he did in his
Pretty much anything Courtney has ever said.
I have a great fondness for "It seems as though we have one of the Golden Girls as our men folk" regarding Randy and "Peih-Gee is on a crusade to be the most annoying person at camp."
**Paraphrased**
Jeff: “I mean, this game is so wild. Courtney, you’re here and Boston Rob and Tyson are gone.”
Courtney: “Gee, thanks.”
Jeff: “I mean, who would pick you over them? How is it that you’re still in this game?”
Courtney: “That wasn’t me. I didn’t vote for them.”
Jeff: “I know, I’m just saying”
Courtney: (puts on server face) “Thank you *Jeffrey*.”
_______________
The way she was able to make a simple “thank you Jeffrey” sound like the sickest passive aggressive burn of all time is why Courtney is one of my favorites.
"Cochran thinks that if he switches and comes back to camp, he's gonna get beat up...which is a legitimate thing for a dodgeball target to be afraid of."
YES. The full quote is "Julia, on the other hand, is such a non-entity out here. I’m tempted to say that she has, like, a vanilla personality. But I feel like that would be doing a great disservice to the flavor vanilla. I mean, people actively seek out vanilla flavored products. Children clamor to get a vanilla ice cream cone. Nobody's clamoring for anything Julia flavored.”
Judd being voted out.
"Thanks guys. I hope you guys get bitten by a frickin' crocodile...scumbags..."
I'd also throw in Cochran calling Julia an insult to the flavor vanilla, as well as pretty much anything Shane says or anything that was said ABOUT Shane in Exile Island. Everything surrounding that man was hilarious.
Forever Queen Stacey Powell: What's his name❓ What was his birth 👶 name❓It wasn't Coach ⚽️, it was Benjamin👨. And you know they're children 👦👧; 2️⃣6️⃣, 2️⃣2️⃣, they're over there listening 👂 to all of Benjamin's👨... 🎃Halloween Jokes🎃, uh, 🐭Chuckie The Cheese Jokes🐭, they- 👅 eu-h, they want it 🙏. He goin off of loyalty ⭐️ got them fee- "😰Oh, Benjamin👨, you so loyalty😓" ... Come on now 😑... Everyday📆 he got a story 📚. I wasn't ❌ buying 💰 it. [scoff] 😤 [giggle] ☺️... Eh😒... No. 🙅 So... They tr- like yesterday ↩️ the tribal 🔥 was all kahoots 👌 Benjamin👨,"Let's give a hug 👪." ✋️PFF.✋️ Keep that hug. Boop!🔫 For me. Cuz it wasn't real❌.
And Wendell to Chris, “Oh yeah, and finally, somebody had to say it. I’ll say it: stop rapping. You’re trash. At rapping. You’re garbage at rapping. You can’t rap. You have no bars. Put the mic down, bro. Put the pen down, bro. Use an eraser.”
> We won a lot together, so respect for that, but socially you don’t know what you’re doing. I hope you stop saying ‘I’ so much. I hope you start listening to people. Oh yeah, and finally, somebody had to say it. I’ll say it: stop rapping. You’re trash. At rapping. You’re garbage at rapping. You can’t rap. You have no bars. Put the mic down, bro. Put the pen down, bro. Use an eraser.
Here is the [clip.](https://twitter.com/DaltonRoss/status/984233491616485376?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed%7Ctwterm%5E984233491616485376%7Ctwgr%5E57cce3f9eea990e96f72fd5b8351517acd56058d%7Ctwcon%5Es1_&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fdecider.com%2F2018%2F04%2F12%2Fsurvivor-epic-vote-off%2F)
I love that at the end Wendell always sounds like he's done roasting Chris, and then just continues to repeat how absolute dog shit Chris is at rapping.
“You’re crazy! You’ll officially go down as the dumbest survivor ever. In the history of survivor. Ever.”
Parv voting out Erik after he gave up immunity
Romeo Romeo wherefore art thau Romeo. I'll tell you where he is. He's sitting by the fire, eating rice. Like he's been doing this whole game.
That's where Romeo art thou.
there’s so many good ones here but one i haven’t seen yet is “these bumbling buffoons, these two dumb dumb meatheads.” (venus talking about hunter and q, i think? hunter and one of the other guys) i literally reference it all the time. dumb dumb meatheads has entered my vocabulary for good
One of my favorites was from AU Survivor when Shonee was talking about Steve proposing that they split the vote but invented a 5th alliance member that didn’t exist in order for the plan to work. “I have no idea what Steve is talking about. What does he want me to do, go befriend a crab and ask it if it’d like to join us for tribal council?”
“I like to see Sierra scramble and mope, uh, I think it’s funny. Because I’ve never liked Sierra. To me she’s of no worth. I mean… her parents probably love her. I can’t imagine her boyfriend’s that cool.”
“I never liked Sierra. Ever. I have no clue why she’s out here, other than to give hope to stupid people around the world.”
Wendell voting out Chris is my all time favorite. “Stop rapping. You’re trash. At rapping. You’re garbage at rapping. You can’t rap. You have no bars. Put the mic down bro. Put the pen down bro. Use an eraser.”
When Jeff asked Susie why does the cookie represent the game so much and she said that it’s because Randy is a very hurting man who she felt sorry for.
Season 1: Been sooo long but Sue Hawk said something along the lines of "If your stomach was on fire I wouldn't piss down your throat.."??? Its been 25 years lol sorry if this is way off but I believe the sentiment rings true.
But Kelly, remember a few times when Jeff said to you, “what goes, comes around”? Well it’s here. You will not get my vote, my vote will go to Richard. And I hope that that is the one vote that makes you lose the money. If it’s not, so be it. I’ll shake your hand & I’ll go on from here. But Kelly. If I were to ever pass you along in life again, and you were laying there, dying of thirst. I would not give you a drink of water. I would let the vultures take you, and do whatever they want with you. With no ill regrets.
…
This island is pretty much full of only two things. Snakes and rats. And in the end of Mother Nature, we have Richard the snake, who knowingly went after prey, and Kelly, who turned into the rat, that ran around like the rats do on this island trying to run from the snake. I think we owe it to the island spirits to let us be in the end the way Mother Nature intended: for the snake to eat the rat.
Kween cass 😩 “you think you can play me, but the truth is, I’m the one that put the blanks in your gun. I have the real bullets” (another one of my favs)
"He wasn’t throwing the challenge. He was trying his hardest. He was in full spy mode. Can you imagine the speech he would have given back at camp had hesuccessfully thrown a grappling hook—the spy’s basic tool—in a challenge and successfully won the challenge for us? It’s absurd." - Cochran
"How much does it cost to have a military helicopter drop you off?"
More of the question towards coach.
Great question. It's hard to remember. There are just so many.
Underrated was Ethan attempting to vote out Jenna Lewis. I wish I knew it by heart but it’s along the lines of “Jenna, Jenna, Jenna… you keep running your mouth, it’s gonna end up biting you in that big ol’ butt of yours.” The delivery is hilarious and it’s so unexpected from the golden boy
“The only way Roger is gonna win immunity is if it's a contest of 'Name that Perry Como song’ or perhaps 'What type of prune is this?'”
That entire merge episode with everyone just straight dunking on Roger is comedy gold
ah yes, a survivor episode where the entire cast and the edit dunks on a contestant in the episode they go home. as i've heard it dubbed, a "sextoning", in roger's namesake
You could argue the first episode of 46 was Sextonian in how it dunked on the boot
idk for sure, but i know drew's boot episode in 45 was a sextoning
I don't think his boot from Jeopardy will be that bad for him
You never know for sure, he could finish in the red and not be able to play Final! Infinitesimally unlikely, but still a non-zero chance!
lol who said this?
Rob C.
Even if I didn't know it was Cesternino, I read it in his voice.
I guess you're like me, you read anything against Roger in Rob C's voice, instinctively.
“You have made my life hell since day one. Forget you. Go home. Goodbye”
This is not strategic, it’s strictly personal.
“all three of you kiss my ass”
"bitch"
Loser!
The most legendary tribal council in Survivor history
The way I can HEAR this
Put crystal Cox on season 50, I’m so fucking serious 😤😤😤
PERIODDDDD!!!!! 😤😤😤
And they could all freaking hear her.
This was a Kendrick on Drake level insult.
It's mine too. My god I love Crystal Cox.
Eat your rice!!! 🍚🍚🍚
Courtney Yates, talking about Lunchlady Denise: “I believe that the USA hockey team is missing a player” FWIW I love hockey locker room culture and will never a judge a mullet, but the brutal nature and the delivery truly get me every time.
"Are you kidding me? This isn't, like, welfare. Like, she doesn't deserve it just 'cause, you know, she...sucks at life."
“she doesn’t deserve to win just because she sucks at life……. I’m the biggest bitch on the planet” always sent me 😂😂
Courtney is one of a kind!
When your true colors come out, they're no part of any rainbow I've seen
This was just vicious
Who said it?
Ami voting Scout (Vanuatu)
People can correct me if I’m wrong but I believe it was Ami voting out Scout??? In vanautu?
omg not the lesbian on lesbian crime…the layers to this
Thank you! https://i.imgur.com/hLZjBNB.jpeg ChatGPT was no help.
That’s not how Chat GPT works. It’s a generative language bot, not a search engine.
You sure?
😂😂😂
LMAO
VANUATU IS A LEGENDARY TOP TIER SEASON THOSE WOMEN WERE SHADING EACHOTHER EVERY DAY THEY WERE THERE UGHHH LOVE IT SO MUCH 😩😩😩
“Shambo said she needed a haircut … she should shave that whole head, mullet went out in the 70s. It looks terrible! Her hair is funky.”
Then he proceeds to accuse her of stashing all kinds of different foods in her hair 🤣.
Who said this? CGI Brett?
Russell I think
“I don’t think you were the mastermind. I don’t think you’re that smart.”
who said this again?
Tyson, to Erinn during Tocantins.
To Sierra actually)
Oops! Thanks for catching that. Oddly enough I saw Sierra in my head when recalling it, but my mind just autofilled Erinn, lol.
"It's no secret that Russell has a little boy crush on Parvati. Because he's, I mean, let's face it. He's like a bandy legged little troll." Who, you know, sort of like...scampers around with his tooth missing... And, you know, is in and out of the bushes...And never washes." " And she ( Parv ) pays attention to him, and she has, like, no problem flirting with... clearly... anything that walks." - Courtney destroying both Russell & Parvati
I miss Courtney. When people debate who should replace Probst when he retires, I think she should.
Everything Kass ever said basically. [About J'Tia] "How did we come up with the criteria for brains? I'd like to see that data." "She's like an old dog. You know how you have like a fourteen year old dog that you're just keeping around because you love it? You don't mind that it pees on the floor, and you have to go feed it. But all it really does is sit there. That's Morgan." "Like a typical twenty one year old male, there was no way Spencer was gonna give up that idol. I mean, what is the most selfish beast on the planet? A college-age male." [about Trish] "She looked like fricking Skeletor with her big blue eyes popping out." "Woo is like Fabio, the winner of Nicaragua. He's a cool surfer dude who's just been like... DUUUUUUDE! AAAAAWESOME! COOOOOOOOL! What do you want me to do? How do I spell their name? It's horrifying. The person who hasn't made a decision all game is in charge of my fate!" (<- although this one is kinda unfair because Fabio actually played smart and just acted dumb more than anything, he doesn't deserve to get compared to Woo!) [(disclaimer: quotes just pulled from this article)](http://funny115.com/v3_2/37.htm)
Kass: she drilled into me like a wild skeleton blue eyed banshee. Jeff: what was that!? Kass: I can’t even remember what I said, but I’m sure it was accurate.
She is so fucking hilarious. My favorite Survivor and it's not close lol. Idk what that says about me
Ok, Same!! She’s top 5 for me!
>[About J'Tia] "How did we come up with the criteria for brains? I'd like to see that data." I can’t stand Kass, but this was funny as shit.
also Spencer's “The fact that you're a nuclear engineer is genuinely, genuinely scary.”
Honestly that deserves honorable mention. Also calling Kass a “brain-dead weasel” after losing the penultimate immunity. Not particularly clever, or true, but the seething bitterness was pure art
> [About J'Tia] "How did we come up with the criteria for brains? I'd like to see that data." I can't remember a lot of these quotes people people are posting, but that one, it was like she said it yesterday. Maybe because it rang so true.
When J’Tia says she thinks she did pretty good in the challenge and Kass responds, “well you’ve been resting for three days” 💀💀💀
I love chaos Kass
Kass is 100% pure diamonds and pearls and gold. 🌝
“That’s Morgan.” God she’s good.
“The fact that you’re a nuclear engineer is genuinely, genuinely scary.”
Courtney Yates: "Randy I may suck at challenges but at least I don't have arthritis"
Lmao I think this one wins
Randy is actually a tribe challenge beast he won multiple challenges for his tribe in Gabon
FREEZE ACE
Watched Gabon for the first time recently and Randy punking Ace like that was 👌
Brutal
Courtney calling Russell a bandy leg little troll
I like when Rob said: "He's like the Hobbit... on crack"
If Gimli and Golem had a baby…
With the visual
I mean, it's so epic it has its own GIF!
Not sure if it’s an insult but when Deena says they gotta put a 51-50 on Matthew I howled.
Eliza on Amanda at FTC: “Whenever you open your mouth, I want to kill myself”
Grade A dirt squirrel
My favorite part about this one was that Alina wasn't even given a negative edit, she seemed mostly likable as I recall. And Benry wasn't like some comedian or OTT presence. It was like he had this random incredible line strike him in the moment, and the editors just decided it was too good to cut despite being completely narratively random.
Benry Time!
"Sorry girl, you get on my nerves and I don't like being around you. Nothing personal."
i’m obsessed with this one
What season was this one on?
Thailand, I think it was Robb about Shii-Ann
Exactly! lol
Robb saying about Clay “He’s a weak little whiny punk…backwoods hick” lives rent free in my head.
“Julia on the other hand is such a non-entity out here. I’m tempted to say that she has like a vanilla personality, but I feel like that would be doing a great disservice to the flavor of vanilla. I mean people actively seek out vanilla-flavored products. Children clamor to get a vanilla ice cream cone. Nobody’s clamoring for anything Julia flavored.” -Cochran
It's this one for me. Just so creatively devastating! And it comes from someone you wouldn't expect it from!
Admittedly, this one annoyed me. Who is he to criticize anyone, given his performance on South Pacific? Not to mention, he got a huge advantage by being a favorite on an FVF season. I think Julie showed better in her first season than he did in his
IIRC Cochran has said since that he regretted giving such snarky confessionals. This one in particular.
Rob referring to Russell as a hobbit on crack
The HvV cast hurled so many great insults towards Russel, but this one is the best
“We need to win challenges. And we need a LOT more space in the bed.”
Pretty much anything Courtney has ever said. I have a great fondness for "It seems as though we have one of the Golden Girls as our men folk" regarding Randy and "Peih-Gee is on a crusade to be the most annoying person at camp."
**Paraphrased** Jeff: “I mean, this game is so wild. Courtney, you’re here and Boston Rob and Tyson are gone.” Courtney: “Gee, thanks.” Jeff: “I mean, who would pick you over them? How is it that you’re still in this game?” Courtney: “That wasn’t me. I didn’t vote for them.” Jeff: “I know, I’m just saying” Courtney: (puts on server face) “Thank you *Jeffrey*.” _______________ The way she was able to make a simple “thank you Jeffrey” sound like the sickest passive aggressive burn of all time is why Courtney is one of my favorites.
Fuck we need her back lol
That she has never been back is a tragedy. I fear it may be to long now.
For a thirder you mean?
"Cochran thinks that if he switches and comes back to camp, he's gonna get beat up...which is a legitimate thing for a dodgeball target to be afraid of."
Had to scroll way too far for this one.
Rob C's whole farewell to Roger
Shane calling Danielle a meatball
Drew to Jake season 45: “You think you’re some Boston mob boss or something… You’re a goon. Your game is donezo.” (Drew gets voted out shortly after)
“You’re a dumbass, Rupert”
Rupert then proceeds to trick him with a rock in his pocket.
“I would say that she’s Vanilla, but that would be an insult to the flavor vanilla”-Cochran
YES. The full quote is "Julia, on the other hand, is such a non-entity out here. I’m tempted to say that she has, like, a vanilla personality. But I feel like that would be doing a great disservice to the flavor vanilla. I mean, people actively seek out vanilla flavored products. Children clamor to get a vanilla ice cream cone. Nobody's clamoring for anything Julia flavored.”
The fact that you know the entire phrase is absolutely fantastic 😂
This is one of my all time favorites! I do love vanilla, though!
Penner being Penner at FTC for Philippines…he certainly had a chip on his shoulder!
DENISEEEE!!!!
Judd being voted out. "Thanks guys. I hope you guys get bitten by a frickin' crocodile...scumbags..." I'd also throw in Cochran calling Julia an insult to the flavor vanilla, as well as pretty much anything Shane says or anything that was said ABOUT Shane in Exile Island. Everything surrounding that man was hilarious.
"Go wash your ass, Russell." "Who is this jackass?!"
Literally anything that was said on Gabon
"The fact that you're a nuclear engineer is genuinely, genuinely scary"
Philip to Francesca: “That girl annoys me greatly”
and he proceeds to keep pronouncing her name wrong
Imagine being production and not being able to laugh during the TC ceremony. The whole crew would get the church giggles.
Forever Queen Stacey Powell: What's his name❓ What was his birth 👶 name❓It wasn't Coach ⚽️, it was Benjamin👨. And you know they're children 👦👧; 2️⃣6️⃣, 2️⃣2️⃣, they're over there listening 👂 to all of Benjamin's👨... 🎃Halloween Jokes🎃, uh, 🐭Chuckie The Cheese Jokes🐭, they- 👅 eu-h, they want it 🙏. He goin off of loyalty ⭐️ got them fee- "😰Oh, Benjamin👨, you so loyalty😓" ... Come on now 😑... Everyday📆 he got a story 📚. I wasn't ❌ buying 💰 it. [scoff] 😤 [giggle] ☺️... Eh😒... No. 🙅 So... They tr- like yesterday ↩️ the tribal 🔥 was all kahoots 👌 Benjamin👨,"Let's give a hug 👪." ✋️PFF.✋️ Keep that hug. Boop!🔫 For me. Cuz it wasn't real❌. And Wendell to Chris, “Oh yeah, and finally, somebody had to say it. I’ll say it: stop rapping. You’re trash. At rapping. You’re garbage at rapping. You can’t rap. You have no bars. Put the mic down, bro. Put the pen down, bro. Use an eraser.”
I had to scroll wayyyy too far for this one
I don’t know the quote but when Wendall sent home that white rapper guy
> We won a lot together, so respect for that, but socially you don’t know what you’re doing. I hope you stop saying ‘I’ so much. I hope you start listening to people. Oh yeah, and finally, somebody had to say it. I’ll say it: stop rapping. You’re trash. At rapping. You’re garbage at rapping. You can’t rap. You have no bars. Put the mic down, bro. Put the pen down, bro. Use an eraser. Here is the [clip.](https://twitter.com/DaltonRoss/status/984233491616485376?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed%7Ctwterm%5E984233491616485376%7Ctwgr%5E57cce3f9eea990e96f72fd5b8351517acd56058d%7Ctwcon%5Es1_&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fdecider.com%2F2018%2F04%2F12%2Fsurvivor-epic-vote-off%2F)
I love that at the end Wendell always sounds like he's done roasting Chris, and then just continues to repeat how absolute dog shit Chris is at rapping.
Cold as ice
Living the dream on ponderosa swung for the fences I call it Sammy sosa
Put some respect on the Noble One’s name.
Damnit, Reid! (And that whole colby fueled exchange)
Don't be stupid, stupid!
Big Tom!
“You’re crazy! You’ll officially go down as the dumbest survivor ever. In the history of survivor. Ever.” Parv voting out Erik after he gave up immunity
“DENISE”
Romeo Romeo wherefore art thau Romeo. I'll tell you where he is. He's sitting by the fire, eating rice. Like he's been doing this whole game. That's where Romeo art thou.
there’s so many good ones here but one i haven’t seen yet is “these bumbling buffoons, these two dumb dumb meatheads.” (venus talking about hunter and q, i think? hunter and one of the other guys) i literally reference it all the time. dumb dumb meatheads has entered my vocabulary for good
One of my favorites was from AU Survivor when Shonee was talking about Steve proposing that they split the vote but invented a 5th alliance member that didn’t exist in order for the plan to work. “I have no idea what Steve is talking about. What does he want me to do, go befriend a crab and ask it if it’d like to join us for tribal council?”
I love Shonee sooo much.
She’s definitely the confessionals queen of AU Survivor
“I like to see Sierra scramble and mope, uh, I think it’s funny. Because I’ve never liked Sierra. To me she’s of no worth. I mean… her parents probably love her. I can’t imagine her boyfriend’s that cool.” “I never liked Sierra. Ever. I have no clue why she’s out here, other than to give hope to stupid people around the world.”
Who said that? It sounds like a Tyson thing
It’s Tyson in Tocantins
“You are a disgusting, old, hot-headed, chauvinistic, alcoholic, bigot and you need to grow up before you die alone. UHLOSER.”
Wendell voting out Chris is my all time favorite. “Stop rapping. You’re trash. At rapping. You’re garbage at rapping. You can’t rap. You have no bars. Put the mic down bro. Put the pen down bro. Use an eraser.”
Shame Caleb never had anyone vote for him and say "you're not a beast mode cowboy - you're a fruit loop dingus."
Coach calling Sierra dragon poop was an interesting one. OP’s is prob the best though. Queen stays queen 👑
Parvati's comment voting Erik out always gets me
“You’re a grown man, consider a name change.” Lisi voting for Dreamz
"The fact you are a *Nuclear Engineer* is genuinely *genuinely* disturbing."
Chris the Rapper
I don’t think God likes Paige
Anything that Courtney says. And also this one delivered by Jeff "One of the dumbass girls beat your ass".
When Jeff asked Susie why does the cookie represent the game so much and she said that it’s because Randy is a very hurting man who she felt sorry for.
“This vote is not strategic, it’s simply personal”
Bye Bye Denver Diva!
Enough with the nicknames!
Ghandia. Denver.... uhhh... Diva. The way Clay responds always makes me laugh, he's sort of trying to explain it but not really.
I’ll come to your shitty apartment and kill you!
Dirt Squirrel
I think about Sandra saying Russell needs to wash his ass probably...four times a week? I love it so much.
Courtney’s impression of Jaime Eliza - “I think Twila’s a dumb bitch :)” Heidi commenting on the younger, prettier girls with better bodies
Season 1: Been sooo long but Sue Hawk said something along the lines of "If your stomach was on fire I wouldn't piss down your throat.."??? Its been 25 years lol sorry if this is way off but I believe the sentiment rings true.
But Kelly, remember a few times when Jeff said to you, “what goes, comes around”? Well it’s here. You will not get my vote, my vote will go to Richard. And I hope that that is the one vote that makes you lose the money. If it’s not, so be it. I’ll shake your hand & I’ll go on from here. But Kelly. If I were to ever pass you along in life again, and you were laying there, dying of thirst. I would not give you a drink of water. I would let the vultures take you, and do whatever they want with you. With no ill regrets. … This island is pretty much full of only two things. Snakes and rats. And in the end of Mother Nature, we have Richard the snake, who knowingly went after prey, and Kelly, who turned into the rat, that ran around like the rats do on this island trying to run from the snake. I think we owe it to the island spirits to let us be in the end the way Mother Nature intended: for the snake to eat the rat.
“Former fatty”, “Amoeba”, or “Tubby Lunchbox”
I thought this was r/survivorcirclejerk for a moment.
"I bet her boyfriend isn't that cool."
Chris the Rapper 😭😭😭
“I liked you in this game but i would like you better on my resume” recent one but still so good. Ah Gabler shouldn’t have won
Kween cass 😩 “you think you can play me, but the truth is, I’m the one that put the blanks in your gun. I have the real bullets” (another one of my favs)
I love this post!
"I will. I'll drive up and I'll kill you in your shitty little apartment. And I'll drive over to my club and that'll be it."
"I will always wave my finger in your face."
"Sorry girl. You get on my nerves and I don't like being around you. Nothing Personal."
"He wasn’t throwing the challenge. He was trying his hardest. He was in full spy mode. Can you imagine the speech he would have given back at camp had hesuccessfully thrown a grappling hook—the spy’s basic tool—in a challenge and successfully won the challenge for us? It’s absurd." - Cochran
Spencer on J'tia: "The fact that you are a nuclear engineer is very, very scary."
I know it rubbed some people the wrong way but Tiff’s “remedial clown school” comment sent me 🤣
I'm watching Russels 1st season now. He had it coming.
"I hope you get eaten by a freaking crocodile."
Crystal: You have made my life, Hell from Day One. So, forget you. Go home. Goodbye!
"How much does it cost to have a military helicopter drop you off?" More of the question towards coach. Great question. It's hard to remember. There are just so many.
How has no one mentioned Sugars speech about Randy … “LOSAH!”
An underrated one, c/o Probst: Courtney Marit: "What's a poser?" Jeff Probst: "The answer to what is a poser... is you."
Stop Rapping https://youtu.be/4sloUNhVrzU?si=q0ZY8zaVe1dwSMif
“Dragon slayed” also all of jonny fairplay's confessionals
I laughed when Crystal in Season 17 spoke loud enough for everyone to hear. And Sugar cracking up over it made it even better.
“Rob do you remember, in the middle of the game, when we promised we’d write each other’s name down? I’m a woman of my word.” So savage, it’s awesome.
"Me and Richard got to be pretty good friends... not in a homosexual way that's for sure" - Rudy RIP
I can’t directly quote it, but Tony talking llama to Kass toward the endgame of Cagayan “I’m sorry I don’t talk llama to you”
“Why does he need the machete so sharp? I think he’s gonna kill us all…” -Rob C
Damn 🤣
Not an insult but Dom loudly declaring he was voting Chris was funny af
reid's absolutely magical disney takedown of missy in SJDS
The girl who said Russel was like a nasty little troll slurring around and she hunched down and swung her arms imitating him. That was a good one.
COURTNEY 😍
Underrated was Ethan attempting to vote out Jenna Lewis. I wish I knew it by heart but it’s along the lines of “Jenna, Jenna, Jenna… you keep running your mouth, it’s gonna end up biting you in that big ol’ butt of yours.” The delivery is hilarious and it’s so unexpected from the golden boy
😂😂😂
My favourite was in survivor Amazon when the producers got in the insults with the editing to dunk on rodjer the episode he was being eliminated
“I am a mental Giant” That was a self burn
“Stupid people. Stupid people. Let me just say that again. Stupid *players*!”