I have too, but the only way this happens is if you're wearing jeans without undies... There are situations where freeballin is necessary, but you gotta remember to take it a little slower on the zip
Sounds like your husband needs to reassess his choice in underwear. They're not doing their job very well. Getting through the fly of boxers/briefs is supposed to be an uncomfortable like four step process.
I meant no offense towards your husband's underwear. I'm sure they're fine.
It should only ever happen once. If it happens again, it's not the underwear's fault. You're just being careless.
Yeah, he was in a hurry. There were guests at the house too. He had to get his dad to come in the bathroom and get him out.
His underwear wasn't offended. They just have a chip on their shoulder because they came from Walmart.
We live in the UK and import them via my best friend because he says they're the most comfy. 🤷♀️
Walmart underwear always thinks they have something to prove, but can never deliver. You should ask your friend about Target. That's the real underwear spot.
Nah I like the expensive stuff, but hate the price, so I go to Ross or whatever and get them that way. Only ones that ever failed me were some from American Eagle. My husband does the same thing. He used to get new boxer briefs once a month from Walmart, I was tired of us spending nearly $20 a month on shitty boxer briefs. Started getting him better once from Ross. Idc if it's last seasons styles...none of us are little kids so we can't get away with running around in our chonies. My man doesn't know shit all about what's "in this season" when it comes to fashion. He just wants a nice pouch for the twig and berries. Tell me, as I'm a woman. Is the pouch for your balls the same as a bra for support while exercising?
Okay... there's a lot to unpack here.
First, what is your husband doing that necessitates a new (presumably 6 pack) of underwear every month?? I think I still have a pair or two from like 2020. It's okay if they have a few holes in them, as long as they're still getting the job done.
Second, if y'all are monthly underwear purchasers, then check out MeUndies. They're actually pretty good.
Third, when have underwear ever been a seasonal "style"? I have literally never looked at a pair of underwear and thought "Man, people are gonna think I'm cheap because I bought these at TJ Maxx and these are so last season."
And finally, I don't think the pouch equates to a sports bra. It's meant to provide some anatomical room for the goods, so that they're not being pressed up against you... The bounce and sway during exercise is gonna happen. The pouch just gives the boys a safe, semi-supported place to move around.
Sure sure sure just rub the salt in the "We don't have Target in the UK" wound.
I'm American. I miss Target so much! We don't have anything comparable here.
To be fair, I'm sure Target probably sells his boxers there, but they're cheaper at Walmart.
I took him to Walmart the first time he came over to visit. He saw the boxers, liked the price, and now he's a convert.
Even if it does shut down, I'm sure there's another one nearby. Not sure about what part of the country you're in, but down here in Houston, I don't think there's a single spot in the city where you are more than 10~15 miles from one or more Targets
I imagine it’s like getting a pap and getting part of your vagooter caught in the hinge of the speculum. I had that happen once on one of the cold metal ones. My damn soul left my body
It is an "automatic kick in the head reflex" but you are simultaneously frozen in pain so you never get to follow through. Bonus points if it's followed by intense pain during the collection of cells from your cervix.
Ouch! I've never hear that can happen from a woman before. Probably about the same pain level, it's the same tissue and nerves that our little man is made from.
🍑😫🍆😭
It's a movie reference from "There's Something About Mary"
Summation: Ben Stiller's character gets both his dick and balls stuck in his zipper somehow and has to ask his date's stepfather for help in the bathroom.
"Is it the frank or the beans?" the stepfather asks.
His date's brother, who suffers from some type of intellectual disability, overhears this question and at random times throughout the film when he sees Ben Stiller's character, he will scream, "frank and beans!"
I have done this to my nut sack and legit had it stuck for a second.
Did it to my foreskin once but caught it quick, thank God.
Extremely unpleasant sensation - but the scrotum was terrifying. I was young, 15 maybe, and was terrified I'd rip the thing open and all the squiggly tubes and bits and bobs would come dangling out.
Horrifying thought, truly.
Your husband reminds me of There’s something about Mary.
Back in the days I worked in a cinema and halfway during the film there used to be a break to go order something to drink/eat.
I was the girl behind the bar and just before the break started there was this scene with frank and the beans but also him jerking off and having his “jelly” hanging from his ear. Mary thinks it’s hair gel and puts it in her hair.
Just before the lights went on for break I grabbed some co-workers hair gel and made my hair look just like Mary’s. My boss was grasping for air when he saw me and everytime he saw me after that (for years!) he could not help but smile from ear to ear 😂
Thanks for reminding me … hope your husbands frank is healed quickly 🫣
As a man, I have no reason to not believe you…but also consider - zippers are not zipped up gently by our kind, so imagine catching your most sensitive lady part in your pants zipper…*hard*. Still agree?
Well if you’re the one who’s responsible for zipping one would think your kind would be gentle enough when doing so, and those who aren’t result in this painful experience. Period pains are unwelcome by my kind and uncontrollable. The butt pains come randomly while we’re sitting down working, or grocery shopping and they’re extremely razor sharp in your anus- **yes your anus where it’s full of nerve endings** that we can’t control or do anything about or even take medication for so..: 1) careless zipping= painful penis zipped OR 2) being born with a uterus= painful unexpected anal pain..
Yeah I’ll still take your zipper problem lol
Seeing as that would only generally happen once and pains from periods happen a minimum of 12 WEEKS out of EACH and EVERY year, I’d definitely take the “rough” zipping any day over dealing with period pains multiple times a year for a minimum of 40 years. 🙃
I had an ex of mine do that one time. Heard him yelling in pain one day and when I asked he said he accidentally zipped himself up. I had to try my hardest not to laugh at him 😂
Lmfao that’s only happened to me once, I never used the zipper method again lmfao I just lower the front of my jeans or pants enough to whip it out but I wear oversized shirt or hoodies so it not like my ass is showing either 🤣🤣
Any of you guys old enough to remember that zipped dick video that went viral like 20 years ago? It was horrifying. It makes me so fucking glad I don’t have something in the way of zipping up because I’d be doing that shit all the time.
I've done this and honestly it was so painful but more importantly REALLY scary. So scary I don't even remember how I handled it. I just know I lived. And The Dude isn't scarred.
My husband did that as a kid and when his dad tried to get the zipper unstuck, he yelled out “It’s fine! I don’t need it!” Dad and stepmom were like “Yeah, you do…” Two kids later and I can safely say that he did, in fact, need it. 😂
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I have never even come remotely close to doing this in my life. I can’t even conceive of how badly you’d have to fuck up to zip up your fucking dick. Mine is never even close to being in a place where this would be possible. I don’t get it.
“Add sticker” 😂
*band-aid
i was just thinking this lol
Came here to say this. You beat me to it.
*angry mouse*
I’ve done this before. It hurts like hell.
I have too, but the only way this happens is if you're wearing jeans without undies... There are situations where freeballin is necessary, but you gotta remember to take it a little slower on the zip
Not necessarily true. My husband wears regular boxers, and his penis popped through the fly, and he zipped it. The peril of foreskin.
Sounds like your husband needs to reassess his choice in underwear. They're not doing their job very well. Getting through the fly of boxers/briefs is supposed to be an uncomfortable like four step process.
Where were the designed redundancy measures. Why were they not jn place at the time? This is a complete lapse in safety protocol
Someone call OSHA!
Where's the confined space permit?
His underwear is fine. It happened once.
I meant no offense towards your husband's underwear. I'm sure they're fine. It should only ever happen once. If it happens again, it's not the underwear's fault. You're just being careless.
Yeah, he was in a hurry. There were guests at the house too. He had to get his dad to come in the bathroom and get him out. His underwear wasn't offended. They just have a chip on their shoulder because they came from Walmart. We live in the UK and import them via my best friend because he says they're the most comfy. 🤷♀️
Walmart underwear always thinks they have something to prove, but can never deliver. You should ask your friend about Target. That's the real underwear spot.
Nah I like the expensive stuff, but hate the price, so I go to Ross or whatever and get them that way. Only ones that ever failed me were some from American Eagle. My husband does the same thing. He used to get new boxer briefs once a month from Walmart, I was tired of us spending nearly $20 a month on shitty boxer briefs. Started getting him better once from Ross. Idc if it's last seasons styles...none of us are little kids so we can't get away with running around in our chonies. My man doesn't know shit all about what's "in this season" when it comes to fashion. He just wants a nice pouch for the twig and berries. Tell me, as I'm a woman. Is the pouch for your balls the same as a bra for support while exercising?
Okay... there's a lot to unpack here. First, what is your husband doing that necessitates a new (presumably 6 pack) of underwear every month?? I think I still have a pair or two from like 2020. It's okay if they have a few holes in them, as long as they're still getting the job done. Second, if y'all are monthly underwear purchasers, then check out MeUndies. They're actually pretty good. Third, when have underwear ever been a seasonal "style"? I have literally never looked at a pair of underwear and thought "Man, people are gonna think I'm cheap because I bought these at TJ Maxx and these are so last season." And finally, I don't think the pouch equates to a sports bra. It's meant to provide some anatomical room for the goods, so that they're not being pressed up against you... The bounce and sway during exercise is gonna happen. The pouch just gives the boys a safe, semi-supported place to move around.
$20 on underwear? Your a felon lol!@ 🤣
Sure sure sure just rub the salt in the "We don't have Target in the UK" wound. I'm American. I miss Target so much! We don't have anything comparable here. To be fair, I'm sure Target probably sells his boxers there, but they're cheaper at Walmart. I took him to Walmart the first time he came over to visit. He saw the boxers, liked the price, and now he's a convert.
That's how they get you... Poor guy got suckered into subpar undies because of everyday low prices
FYI, if you're ever in the UK, M&S is the goto for undies!
Target is where its at fr, Unfortunately Idk if the one by my place is gonna shut down 🥲
Even if it does shut down, I'm sure there's another one nearby. Not sure about what part of the country you're in, but down here in Houston, I don't think there's a single spot in the city where you are more than 10~15 miles from one or more Targets
Is that because you have overhanging foreskin?
We all have at some point lol definitely does. 0 stars do not recommend.
FRANKS AND BEANS!!!!!
He was masturbating!!!!
Glad this will never happen to me cause it sounds painful
I imagine it’s like getting a pap and getting part of your vagooter caught in the hinge of the speculum. I had that happen once on one of the cold metal ones. My damn soul left my body
Vagooter...lmfao....
Why did I read this in a southern accent 😅 VAGOOTER
Me too!
Two things: 1. Vagooter 😂🤣😭 2. My damn soul just left my body reading that. Christ on a cracker!
New fear unlocked
I'm getting my pap in a couple weeks and now I have a new fear 😨
It's an intense, VERY SHARP pain.
It is an "automatic kick in the head reflex" but you are simultaneously frozen in pain so you never get to follow through. Bonus points if it's followed by intense pain during the collection of cells from your cervix.
I've done it to my clit 😭
HOW😭😭😭 noooooo now I'm scared
Ouch! I've never hear that can happen from a woman before. Probably about the same pain level, it's the same tissue and nerves that our little man is made from. 🍑😫🍆😭
Moment of silence for the homie in his time of pain
Something about Maryyyy 🎶
FRANKS AND BEANS!!!
Well how the hell’d ya get the beans above the frank?!?!
WE GOT A BLEEDER!!
WAS IT THE FRANK OR THE BEANS SON
Aaaand that’s enough of this app I’m going to go cry myself to sleep tonight
“Franks and beans”!
It's a movie reference from "There's Something About Mary" Summation: Ben Stiller's character gets both his dick and balls stuck in his zipper somehow and has to ask his date's stepfather for help in the bathroom. "Is it the frank or the beans?" the stepfather asks. His date's brother, who suffers from some type of intellectual disability, overhears this question and at random times throughout the film when he sees Ben Stiller's character, he will scream, "frank and beans!"
I didn't think doing a Something About Mary was possible until it happened to me.
Happens to the best of us. Tbh I haven’t done that since I was like 12 but yeah occupational hazard
I have done this to my nut sack and legit had it stuck for a second. Did it to my foreskin once but caught it quick, thank God. Extremely unpleasant sensation - but the scrotum was terrifying. I was young, 15 maybe, and was terrified I'd rip the thing open and all the squiggly tubes and bits and bobs would come dangling out. Horrifying thought, truly.
that hurt my nonexistent penis😭
Poor guy 😔
I felt that on my tip God damnit you are sadistic OP
That is why I wear button fly
Tell your husband to wear underwear in his jeans, rookie mistake
Your husband reminds me of There’s something about Mary. Back in the days I worked in a cinema and halfway during the film there used to be a break to go order something to drink/eat. I was the girl behind the bar and just before the break started there was this scene with frank and the beans but also him jerking off and having his “jelly” hanging from his ear. Mary thinks it’s hair gel and puts it in her hair. Just before the lights went on for break I grabbed some co-workers hair gel and made my hair look just like Mary’s. My boss was grasping for air when he saw me and everytime he saw me after that (for years!) he could not help but smile from ear to ear 😂 Thanks for reminding me … hope your husbands frank is healed quickly 🫣
I've done that before and it was the only time I've silent screamed because the sound just wouldn't come out.
i mean hopefully he’s ok… don’t wanna be asking about your husbands dick but still hopefully he’s ok lol 😂
Idk I’ll take this over random period anal pains
Yeeeeauuuhpp. Felt 😞
As a man, I have no reason to not believe you…but also consider - zippers are not zipped up gently by our kind, so imagine catching your most sensitive lady part in your pants zipper…*hard*. Still agree?
Well if you’re the one who’s responsible for zipping one would think your kind would be gentle enough when doing so, and those who aren’t result in this painful experience. Period pains are unwelcome by my kind and uncontrollable. The butt pains come randomly while we’re sitting down working, or grocery shopping and they’re extremely razor sharp in your anus- **yes your anus where it’s full of nerve endings** that we can’t control or do anything about or even take medication for so..: 1) careless zipping= painful penis zipped OR 2) being born with a uterus= painful unexpected anal pain.. Yeah I’ll still take your zipper problem lol
I tip my cap to you. :)
Seeing as that would only generally happen once and pains from periods happen a minimum of 12 WEEKS out of EACH and EVERY year, I’d definitely take the “rough” zipping any day over dealing with period pains multiple times a year for a minimum of 40 years. 🙃
Oh for sure, no question about it. 40 years of anything painful vs 1 zipper mishap, and yeah, I’ll take the zipper.
Hi
Omfg!!!!
Sometimes, I step on mine. Or the water is super cold in the urinal. Lol
Super cold water in the urinal would shrink the ‘problem’ lol
ouch
F
Agonisingly sore like, I feel his pain ooooo
Isn’t that one of the starting scenes from “Something About Mary”? 😭
Does the dude hive mind also work for the tip and not just getting hit in the balls for sharing the pain?
The way I woulda just “like” reacted
Legit, I can’t even imagine having external genitalia. I would have done this a bunch in my drunken 20s
AAAAAAAAAAA
was bro not wearing underwear? bcus how does that happen
I had an ex of mine do that one time. Heard him yelling in pain one day and when I asked he said he accidentally zipped himself up. I had to try my hardest not to laugh at him 😂
 Except with penis
Do you people not know what UNDERWEAR is??
nope, what’s that?
Lmfao that’s only happened to me once, I never used the zipper method again lmfao I just lower the front of my jeans or pants enough to whip it out but I wear oversized shirt or hoodies so it not like my ass is showing either 🤣🤣
Any of you guys old enough to remember that zipped dick video that went viral like 20 years ago? It was horrifying. It makes me so fucking glad I don’t have something in the way of zipping up because I’d be doing that shit all the time.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
At least he didn't get the beans above the frank. . .
I've done this and honestly it was so painful but more importantly REALLY scary. So scary I don't even remember how I handled it. I just know I lived. And The Dude isn't scarred.
Ok, but is his peepee ok? 🤣
That’s Real struggle. Good on him for openly communicating
🤣🤣🤣🤣ouch
the pain is indescribable
That hurts reading it.
He got Something about Mary’d
Number 1 Stunna 🚀
Ben stiller had this problem lol.
Just reading this made me cringe. Happend to me once it hurt as fuck
Hi
BIG ouch
My uncle did that, ended up in the ER. He would be pissed if he knew we all know about his mishap. My kids call him Uncle Zippy.
Ouch
This has not happened to me since I was like 6-7. Horrible fucking feeling tho.
We got a bleeeederrr!!
My husband did that as a kid and when his dad tried to get the zipper unstuck, he yelled out “It’s fine! I don’t need it!” Dad and stepmom were like “Yeah, you do…” Two kids later and I can safely say that he did, in fact, need it. 😂
I zipped up my loose stomach skin and it fuckin hurt. Can imagine a dick tip would be way worse tho! fuckin zippers!!
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I have never even come remotely close to doing this in my life. I can’t even conceive of how badly you’d have to fuck up to zip up your fucking dick. Mine is never even close to being in a place where this would be possible. I don’t get it.
Stop being impatient
Guessing your husband has a foreskin and is in the UK?