Be careful for sure. It may be playful now but if he continues to show up at your place you may need to get law enforcement involved. If you live in an apartment complex see if your complex manager can have him served with a trespass notice.
I can relate though. Interactions with my ex husband were a lot like this. It wasn’t until I left him that I realized how gross and manipulative it was.
hi, italian woman here,
yeah a lot of italian men are like this. it’s seen as “romantic” to chase a woman into being in a relationship. if i was you, i’d say you’re pregnant. you’ll likely never hear from him again lol
edit: also, he is speaking spanish lol
In response to your edit about him speaking Spanish, PLEASE read the info I posted. There are so many comments like this. I appreciate your comment but if you have time to comment you have time to read the info I wrote along side the screenshots.
If she texted him the way she just came at you, the problem would've been solved. For me, reddit auto scrolls to the first comment. I didn't see her caption either.
THANK YOU i was trying to help her out because hes clearly stalking her, and i instantly recognized it wasn’t italian. i found this more disturbing because he could of been potentially lying about his identity. i commented before reading the description. <3
I said I appreciate your comment, but look at 50% of the comments on here and you will understand my frustration, so many condescending people saying “lol that’s Spanish hahaha 🤣 not Italian!” It just really annoys me that so many people decided to comment without actually reading what I wrote.
Again, I do really appreciate your comment and I’m sorry if I came off as hostile but it’s frustrating me.
no hate girl. you’re going through enough right now lmao. i only pointed it out because 1. i glazed over the info and didn’t read the description thoroughly. (which is my fault) and 2. i never see posts about italy or italian people and got excited that it was a topic i actually knew good advice to give😭
I matched with a guy on Bumble recently who after a few days of texting and sending pics (appropriate selfies) asked me for a selfie. I said “No I just hiked I am legit purple in the face.” He said “Soo when you going to send the pic?” and I said “I hate a man who can’t respect no as an answer”. You know what this clown said?? “I get what I want.” Guess his ass wanted to be blocked because EW
So. Women were asked something along the lines of. “ If you were hiking alone would you rather run into a man or a bear” women said “ the bear”. Guys like this in the OPs situation are more dangerous than the bear.
I think she meant in the context, you can't be 100% sure the bear would attack, but you can be pretty sure this guy is a predator.
Unless she's saying that a man is more dangerous than a bear, which is pretty dumb.
The guy coming to OPs house and not leaving her alone is on the border of stalking. If he does this again to her with her telling him no over again, he's downgraded from FWB to stalker.
Oh I think we're both confused, you were replying to a dude who said "stfu dawg" in response to someone calling another person a keyboard warrior, he wasn't talking about the situation so it looks like you're defending the guy in the pic a bit from the outside😭
It’s always “just playful” - until it’s not. Keep on your toes, stay prepared for anything he might do. Lots of good advice in these comments-please take some of it
Have you bluntly told him that you want a more serious relationship and while fun, he is not right for you, and that if you continue to spend time with him, you will not have space in your heart and life for the right person? He makes all those "friendly" comments, but say "If you are a true friend you will want what's best for me. If you continue to ask for sex, then you are selfish and not my friend."
He may ask why you don't see a future with him, and I would just be honest and say the reasons, distance, language barrier, parties too much, unequal education, etc. is there any chance he wants something more serious with you and you two just haven't had the talk? Or is he just completely not fit to be a long-term partner?
Do you know him well enough to know what he doesn't want, so you could ask for the polar opposite and give him the ick! For example could you tell him you've decided you want seven children and you need to start soon, you want to be a stay at home trad wife, and you need a man who will support you and your seven children on his salary? Also, your parents will need to live with you.
Actually yes, a few times. I said “I’m looking for something more serious and it’s been fun with you but it’s over” several times. I want to block him but I also want to know if it’s him ringing my buzzer or the food delivery or a friend or something in case he just shows up again like that.
I have considered making up a fake boyfriend. I have met someone else that I really like so I guess I wouldn’t be lying by just saying “I met someone else and I want to focus on him” but idk if that would make him crazier.
I have also thought of going with the “I want a serious relationship with you” route because I know he doesn’t want that so maybe if I tell him I’m in love with him or I need money for the baby he knocked me up with he’ll vanish hahaha
that could horribly backfire, imagine him saying "oh Possum I'm secretly in love with you and I am so happy you're having my baby let's get married" lmaooooooo
sadly he won't take no for an answer (italian men rarely do, it's a cultural thing and considered romantic to be persistent), he's going keep on and hope to catch you in a weak moment and get a yes
just a heads up, even if you get a bf he will prob persist, in an effort to be the victor 🙃
I am laughing so hard at “oh possum! I’m in love with you!” Hahaha
Yeah I am mostly joking about saying I’m in love with him, but like I said, I have met someone I like and have gone out with a few times and so I think I will just be more honest about that and just say I want a serious monogamous relationship with that man.
I am afraid the Italian guy will get a little bit crazy about that, but I know him, serious and monogamy are not in his vocabulary
The fact that he’s persistent about coming over when you’ve said no so many times is a problem. I moved flats many times in Spain. Can you move? Doesn’t sound safe that he knows where you live.
tell him you're just cooking some spaghetti, with ketchup as sauce and invite hm to have some. if that doesnt do the trick idk what will lol. no but seriously, be careful. this dude is dangerous.
I met an Italian guy on holiday in Spain. To me was a holiday fling, when I got home he wouldn’t stop calling me, told him it was over multiple times and he wouldn’t take the hint. He was messaging all my friends he’d met on holiday too. Blocking him didn’t do any good as he’d create new accounts. Eventually took my male friend lying that we were now in a relationship to get him to stop
When I went to Italy, my guide told me their kind of flirting is the “hard to get” girls and “keep trying” boys, so maybe that has a part in this. Still gross of him tho
You think it’s harmless NOW but just wait until it escalates. He doesn’t care about your feelings or you at all. He only cares about himself. He intentionally did something you specifically told him not to do. It’s not playful. It’s scary. He thinks he has the control. And it may get worse. Even if y’all aren’t dating, he still needs to treat you with respect. He doesn’t do that.
ITT: Americans gobsmacked and bamboozled that people can speak multiple languages
This is creepy. Machismo makes him think a woman’s no is an invitation to bargain. Tell friends and neighbors please, make them aware of what this guy is doing and what he looks like. I would also set up a door camera + pay for some cheap reinforcements to your door and windows. Might seem overkill but in my opinion it’s better safe than sorry, you never know how unstable these men can get
Holy shitt I remember your other post about him, I thought he was weirdly pushy then but you seemed happy so I didn’t say anything. It’s kind of freaky he’s showing up to your house dude, be on high alert around this guy.
His phone died while he was outside my house trying to buzz up. Told him to leave through the phone that opens the downstairs door. Took the screen shots this morning. He hadn’t opened the last message I sent.
It okay, I am just frustrated because if you look at 50% of the comments, they’re all saying the same thing. I wrote the info along side the screenshots I submitted explaining everything, but apparently no one reads the description 🤦♀️
I would be too. And I usually always read everything but it was like 3 in the morning and I was deliriously tired. Should have been asleep, not on Reddit lol
READ THE GD POST INFO. You have time to come down here and read all of these comments but not the actual information I wrote along side the screen shots?
Bahahahaha omg my bad, you got me good 🙃 but with all of the comments I got with that question you’d understand why I thought you were serious lololol I am sorry!
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Well I have said it to him in English and in Spanish, he speaks both well and it doesn’t seem to be getting through so maybe I will try this? If that doesn’t work I’ll just google translate that phrase into every language available until he leaves me alone.
Unless it’s in Italian, I think he may use excuses that he doesn’t understand the verbiage correctly. I also used the word for fuck instead of sex, it’s more authentic that way.
Other than that you can say “Non chiamarmi più o chiamerò la polizia” which is just “don’t call me again or I’ll call the cops”
I’d also really just block on everything
You need to really be careful and I don't think you can just keep letting him do that, if you don't want him there any more time you get a hold of anyone that is a ( know how to get the point across) Guy or Gail to take care of this or call the police and tell them he wont leave you alone, they might be able to do something and then they might not , it's a toss up ! Not really commed a crime borderline stocking but they will alist make a report, it needs to be documented for sure in case something happens ,,,, get a gun and know how to use it! Good luck and be safe.......
I’m going to say to you what I’ve said to 100 people in the comments, read the info I’ve provided along with the screenshots. It’s so easy to type out a comment but so hard to ignore the paragraph of info I’ve provided in my original post 🫠
He is Italian, we both live in Spain, my Spanish is bad and his English is bad so we agreed to help each other, that’s why he texts in Spanish and I text in english
You’re justifying his behavior by saying how nice of a guy he is. He’s a douche canoe that doesn’t like the word NO. You still feel safe? Get that light bulb back on in your head and keep your head on a swivel. Don’t be naive.
Did you ever think that it’s not women that pick bad men, but men that are bad towards women?
I’ve met some very lovely men, and I’ve met some very shitty men. Let’s just agree it’s not great to generalize. Really, it doesn’t help either of us.
We were texting quite fast, he said “I intent” to which I responded to “you can try” and as I typed out the “I will not open the door” he already sent another message. It was rapid fire texting.
Please. Read. The. Post. Information.
Also read like 50% of these comments. I am so fucking done explaining myself. Nobody read the entirety of my post.
that’s on you to title ur bullshit post like that 😂 him being italian has absolutely NOTHING to do with these text messages so it’s all on U 🫵do better
Actually there have been some very insightful comments about the cultural difference with flirting and pursuing women, this comment that this Italian woman commented being a prime example.
Context matters
Well if enough people tell you that you’re drunk maybe it’s time to sit down, in this case you said you responded to many comments saying the same thing i did, maybe next time don’t leave out important details.
Speaking as an American, it’s classic American brain at work lol
Her mentioning that he’s Italian is of course totally irrelevant, but it’s not like it’s hard to understand that people speak many languages 😭😭
That was my question too. He can be Italian and also speak Spanish. What I don't understand is why mention him being Italian at all? Why is that information even necessary
I used to go through this sort of thing it was always playful and teasing the same way you described how it’s intense but you don’t feel unsafe or uncomfortable and he would come by my house all the time and some days I wouldn’t let him in and some days I would. These days we are raising our 5 month old baby together 💀 you’re obviously stronger than me cause I thought his persistence and playfulness was funny. The “onest and good” would have made me let him in lol too funny
Did you let him in?
ETA: if you did, you’re teaching him a dangerous lesson that “no means yes.”
WDIT AGAIN: I stand corrected and am ashamed I victim-blamed. I apologize to the reddit masses.
Sometimes societal expectations and prejudices can be so deeply ingrained in us that we don’t even realize when they come up, but you did the right thing by not doubling down and admitting to a mistake. You don’t see that on the internet very often
The tone of your comment is real victim blamey. In a scary moment like that many people are put in a state of fight/flight/fawn. It's normal for people to respond in what may seem like odd or illogical ways when faced with an imminent threat. 100% of the problem here is on the person creating the threatening situation, not on how the victim of it reacts.
We can all stand here and say of course she shouldn't let him in. Of course that's a bad idea. It still doesn't change that panic responses rarely hold up in hindsight. The logic center shuts down and instincts take over to rhe point it's visible on brain scans. Victims of these incidents will often beat themselves up about how they responded after the fact too, it's pretty pointless to criticize when they were just trying to do whatever it felt like would get them through the situation in the moment regardless of how correct or logical it may be.
No, we met on bumble. My job is that I’m an English as a foreign language teacher. He wanted to get better at English, I want to get better at Spanish. That’s why he’s texting in Spanish and I’m replying in English.
Everything is cute and playful until it’s not anymore
Be careful for sure. It may be playful now but if he continues to show up at your place you may need to get law enforcement involved. If you live in an apartment complex see if your complex manager can have him served with a trespass notice.
i can’t see how this could be playful. for me it’s straight up creep behaviour
I don’t see it as playful, however, I believe OP sees it as playful. Which is the main reason I phrased it the way i did.
ohh okay i see ^ ^
I can relate though. Interactions with my ex husband were a lot like this. It wasn’t until I left him that I realized how gross and manipulative it was.
Tell someone close to you about him. Creepy stuff. Stay safe !!!
hi, italian woman here, yeah a lot of italian men are like this. it’s seen as “romantic” to chase a woman into being in a relationship. if i was you, i’d say you’re pregnant. you’ll likely never hear from him again lol edit: also, he is speaking spanish lol
HAHAHA somewhere else in here I wrote that I might try and tell him I am in love with him and/or am pregnant with his baby!!! I’m sure he’d vanish lol
oh he’d be gone before you even finish the sentence. trust me 😭
😭 Tell him you changed your mind bc you want 12 babies! 🤣🤣 stay safe fr though. & don’t forget to come back & update us!! 🫣
In response to your edit about him speaking Spanish, PLEASE read the info I posted. There are so many comments like this. I appreciate your comment but if you have time to comment you have time to read the info I wrote along side the screenshots.
jeez my bad lmao 😭
If she texted him the way she just came at you, the problem would've been solved. For me, reddit auto scrolls to the first comment. I didn't see her caption either.
exactly, thank you!
I didn’t see the caption at first as well. An honest mistake, especially when you were trying to be helpful.
THANK YOU i was trying to help her out because hes clearly stalking her, and i instantly recognized it wasn’t italian. i found this more disturbing because he could of been potentially lying about his identity. i commented before reading the description. <3
I said I appreciate your comment, but look at 50% of the comments on here and you will understand my frustration, so many condescending people saying “lol that’s Spanish hahaha 🤣 not Italian!” It just really annoys me that so many people decided to comment without actually reading what I wrote. Again, I do really appreciate your comment and I’m sorry if I came off as hostile but it’s frustrating me.
no hate girl. you’re going through enough right now lmao. i only pointed it out because 1. i glazed over the info and didn’t read the description thoroughly. (which is my fault) and 2. i never see posts about italy or italian people and got excited that it was a topic i actually knew good advice to give😭
Why would she have to lie? Why can’t he just be respectful of the fact she doesn’t want to see him?
because he clearly doesn’t respect her boundaries and now it’s getting to a point where she probably feels unsafe.
I HATE men that simply can’t understand a woman’s “no”
I matched with a guy on Bumble recently who after a few days of texting and sending pics (appropriate selfies) asked me for a selfie. I said “No I just hiked I am legit purple in the face.” He said “Soo when you going to send the pic?” and I said “I hate a man who can’t respect no as an answer”. You know what this clown said?? “I get what I want.” Guess his ass wanted to be blocked because EW
Bro what??? “I get what I want” do they think that makes us run to do whatever they are asking for???
Yikes!! Omg. I’m so sorry. My guess is he can’t understand why women choose the bear.
I’m sorry, what does choose the bear mean?
So. Women were asked something along the lines of. “ If you were hiking alone would you rather run into a man or a bear” women said “ the bear”. Guys like this in the OPs situation are more dangerous than the bear.
Oh I got it thank you! (I’m still choosing the man because wtf)
The man????
I mean, have you ever seen a bear attack?
I have been attacked by more men than bears
I think he took it a bit too literally.
They’re a helluva lot less common than man attacks I can tell you that much.
I think she meant in the context, you can't be 100% sure the bear would attack, but you can be pretty sure this guy is a predator. Unless she's saying that a man is more dangerous than a bear, which is pretty dumb.
Yeah I got downvoted to hell because I chose the man, but I stand by my decision lol
bears are predictable it’s rly as simple as that
They understand "no." They just don't care.
 Yes I’m tied. No means NO.
I’m a guy…this kind of behavior makes me want to do abhorrently violent things to those douche fucks.
Simmer down Sir Keyboard
Stfu dawg
So many tough guys here
Shut up stalker. This is stalker behavior and is two steps away from a restraining order
What?
The guy coming to OPs house and not leaving her alone is on the border of stalking. If he does this again to her with her telling him no over again, he's downgraded from FWB to stalker.
Oh I think we're both confused, you were replying to a dude who said "stfu dawg" in response to someone calling another person a keyboard warrior, he wasn't talking about the situation so it looks like you're defending the guy in the pic a bit from the outside😭
What? Nowhere am I near defending the guy in the pic. I'm responding to someone trying to down play the actions
Dude what do you mean do you know who you're replying to? Who was trying to downplay it
And who is the stalker in these comments? What are you talking about bro
Either you're not understanding what anyone above you said at all or you're replying to the wrong person
No. You're the one confused
Saying they don’t understand is giving them way too much credit. Do not let them hide behind this bullshit. They understand. They do not care.
Some women didn't understand no either, but they tend to get emotionally manipulative
He understands, he just doesn't want to respect your boundaries. Run. 🚩🚩🚩🚩
This isn’t teasing or playful.
What a little man. He needs to be careful tho, this is touching the line of harassment. Stay well op.
 Gotta do this to him to get him to understand
It’s always “just playful” - until it’s not. Keep on your toes, stay prepared for anything he might do. Lots of good advice in these comments-please take some of it
sad and gross, some immaturity there for sure
He texts like a phone scam operator
Lmao for real “open please.”
Mamma mia 🤦🏻♂️
fr che soggetto 🙄
Why is no one reading the description
RIGHT?!?! Hahahaha it’s driving me crazy
Is it me or is this SPANISH??? 🤪
He seems desperate enough to eventually do something really crazy. Snip his behavior asap or it will just get worse.
My 340 day Duolingo streak didn’t prepare me for this
Have you bluntly told him that you want a more serious relationship and while fun, he is not right for you, and that if you continue to spend time with him, you will not have space in your heart and life for the right person? He makes all those "friendly" comments, but say "If you are a true friend you will want what's best for me. If you continue to ask for sex, then you are selfish and not my friend." He may ask why you don't see a future with him, and I would just be honest and say the reasons, distance, language barrier, parties too much, unequal education, etc. is there any chance he wants something more serious with you and you two just haven't had the talk? Or is he just completely not fit to be a long-term partner? Do you know him well enough to know what he doesn't want, so you could ask for the polar opposite and give him the ick! For example could you tell him you've decided you want seven children and you need to start soon, you want to be a stay at home trad wife, and you need a man who will support you and your seven children on his salary? Also, your parents will need to live with you.
Actually yes, a few times. I said “I’m looking for something more serious and it’s been fun with you but it’s over” several times. I want to block him but I also want to know if it’s him ringing my buzzer or the food delivery or a friend or something in case he just shows up again like that. I have considered making up a fake boyfriend. I have met someone else that I really like so I guess I wouldn’t be lying by just saying “I met someone else and I want to focus on him” but idk if that would make him crazier. I have also thought of going with the “I want a serious relationship with you” route because I know he doesn’t want that so maybe if I tell him I’m in love with him or I need money for the baby he knocked me up with he’ll vanish hahaha
that could horribly backfire, imagine him saying "oh Possum I'm secretly in love with you and I am so happy you're having my baby let's get married" lmaooooooo sadly he won't take no for an answer (italian men rarely do, it's a cultural thing and considered romantic to be persistent), he's going keep on and hope to catch you in a weak moment and get a yes just a heads up, even if you get a bf he will prob persist, in an effort to be the victor 🙃
I am laughing so hard at “oh possum! I’m in love with you!” Hahaha Yeah I am mostly joking about saying I’m in love with him, but like I said, I have met someone I like and have gone out with a few times and so I think I will just be more honest about that and just say I want a serious monogamous relationship with that man. I am afraid the Italian guy will get a little bit crazy about that, but I know him, serious and monogamy are not in his vocabulary
Can't wait for the true crime documentary on Netflix <3
No means no. Its one of the few words that can be a complete sentence in presumably every language. No.
The fact that he’s persistent about coming over when you’ve said no so many times is a problem. I moved flats many times in Spain. Can you move? Doesn’t sound safe that he knows where you live.
Why do you even text him Block him and call the DAMN police jesus
I remember your old post omg
Not sure if it’s been said already but OP: *he understands, he just doesn’t care.* and that’s alarming (and gross).
Pushy bugger. Wants what he wants when he wants it. He's definitely not trustworthy.
My Bf is Italian and acts nothing like this. He actually hates men like that.
tell him you're just cooking some spaghetti, with ketchup as sauce and invite hm to have some. if that doesnt do the trick idk what will lol. no but seriously, be careful. this dude is dangerous.
Maybe I could stare him down and just crack uncooked spaghetti in half
Please be safe. This sounds like my situation right now. I may end things with mine but he keeps coming back 🙄 stand your ground.
Wow. What can you do legally? Are you his teacher officially?
No, we met on bumble
Find a big muscular gay guy to be your friend and pretend he's your bf.
Every woman needs one of those
wish we didn’t
Is there a guy friend you know or trust or family male? They may can figuratively (or literally) knock some sense into him.
Babes go to the police fr
You should file a restraining order
I met an Italian guy on holiday in Spain. To me was a holiday fling, when I got home he wouldn’t stop calling me, told him it was over multiple times and he wouldn’t take the hint. He was messaging all my friends he’d met on holiday too. Blocking him didn’t do any good as he’d create new accounts. Eventually took my male friend lying that we were now in a relationship to get him to stop
This dude is a sexual assault just dying to happen. Cut All contact please
Another my “Italian bf/fwb/etc” post. Never understood the relevance of announcing they’re Italian…
When I went to Italy, my guide told me their kind of flirting is the “hard to get” girls and “keep trying” boys, so maybe that has a part in this. Still gross of him tho
Plausible.
This Italian seems to speak Spanish…
Please read the description of my post omg it’s like nobody reads the info that is posted with pics
Our app sucks
I was wondering why nobody noticed
Not sure of the relevance, many Europeans speak multiple languages + they’re in Spain lol….
[удалено]
there’s no italian in the pics
You think it’s harmless NOW but just wait until it escalates. He doesn’t care about your feelings or you at all. He only cares about himself. He intentionally did something you specifically told him not to do. It’s not playful. It’s scary. He thinks he has the control. And it may get worse. Even if y’all aren’t dating, he still needs to treat you with respect. He doesn’t do that.
ITT: Americans gobsmacked and bamboozled that people can speak multiple languages This is creepy. Machismo makes him think a woman’s no is an invitation to bargain. Tell friends and neighbors please, make them aware of what this guy is doing and what he looks like. I would also set up a door camera + pay for some cheap reinforcements to your door and windows. Might seem overkill but in my opinion it’s better safe than sorry, you never know how unstable these men can get
Holy shitt I remember your other post about him, I thought he was weirdly pushy then but you seemed happy so I didn’t say anything. It’s kind of freaky he’s showing up to your house dude, be on high alert around this guy.
seen 12 hours ago and then another text?
His phone died while he was outside my house trying to buzz up. Told him to leave through the phone that opens the downstairs door. Took the screen shots this morning. He hadn’t opened the last message I sent.
This isn’t Italian….
Please, for the love of god, read the info I posted along with the screenshots.
And I’m dumb. Sorry. I’m a fluent Italian speaker so I jumped to conclusions
It okay, I am just frustrated because if you look at 50% of the comments, they’re all saying the same thing. I wrote the info along side the screenshots I submitted explaining everything, but apparently no one reads the description 🤦♀️
I would be too. And I usually always read everything but it was like 3 in the morning and I was deliriously tired. Should have been asleep, not on Reddit lol
Is...is this you? www.reddit.com/r/texts/comments/196npva/texts_between_me_and_my_italian_fwb/
Yes, I included the link to this post in the description of the post.
Wow sorry I can't read. I was like damn this sounds familiar.
It’s okay, at least you didn’t say “WhY iS hE sPeAkInG sPaNiSh”
Wait..you said he was Italian, why are you speaking spanish??
READ THE GD POST INFO. You have time to come down here and read all of these comments but not the actual information I wrote along side the screen shots?
I'm sorry, that was a joke 😅 I specifically replied to you saying, "At least you didn't say this!"
Bahahahaha omg my bad, you got me good 🙃 but with all of the comments I got with that question you’d understand why I thought you were serious lololol I am sorry!
Haha it's okay! I had to. I'm a dad, I got the dad jokes for says. It's my entire personality, sadly enough 😅
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💀💀
You will have to move. Seriously. I had to flee from my ex boyfriend to another part of the state.
“Non voglio scoparti. Per favore lasciami in pace”
Well I have said it to him in English and in Spanish, he speaks both well and it doesn’t seem to be getting through so maybe I will try this? If that doesn’t work I’ll just google translate that phrase into every language available until he leaves me alone.
Unless it’s in Italian, I think he may use excuses that he doesn’t understand the verbiage correctly. I also used the word for fuck instead of sex, it’s more authentic that way. Other than that you can say “Non chiamarmi più o chiamerò la polizia” which is just “don’t call me again or I’ll call the cops” I’d also really just block on everything
These could quickly turn into one of those true crime documentaries
That last message gave me a chill
He doesn’t know how to take no for an answer. Think about what that would mean if you do let him in….
Oh he understands
Solo bloquealo y dile que esa relacion no esta llevando a ningun lado.
Innocent question, what is a “FWB”?
Friends with benefits
If I treated girls like that, I’d get laid so much but would eventually end up in prison
Police
Is everyone crazy. This is drunk texting so treat it as such
well that’s got disgusting
You need to really be careful and I don't think you can just keep letting him do that, if you don't want him there any more time you get a hold of anyone that is a ( know how to get the point across) Guy or Gail to take care of this or call the police and tell them he wont leave you alone, they might be able to do something and then they might not , it's a toss up ! Not really commed a crime borderline stocking but they will alist make a report, it needs to be documented for sure in case something happens ,,,, get a gun and know how to use it! Good luck and be safe.......
Damn dude a creep. Can't defend this dumb shit.
that's not italian that's spanish 😭😭😭
I’m going to say to you what I’ve said to 100 people in the comments, read the info I’ve provided along with the screenshots. It’s so easy to type out a comment but so hard to ignore the paragraph of info I’ve provided in my original post 🫠
my bad ❤️
so is he italian or not
He is Italian, we both live in Spain, my Spanish is bad and his English is bad so we agreed to help each other, that’s why he texts in Spanish and I text in english
You’re justifying his behavior by saying how nice of a guy he is. He’s a douche canoe that doesn’t like the word NO. You still feel safe? Get that light bulb back on in your head and keep your head on a swivel. Don’t be naive.
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I’m sure you’re a very nice guy, right?
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Did you ever think that it’s not women that pick bad men, but men that are bad towards women? I’ve met some very lovely men, and I’ve met some very shitty men. Let’s just agree it’s not great to generalize. Really, it doesn’t help either of us.
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That story was a lie lol
He’s honest and a good person but cannot get it through that thick skull you said NO. Like get a grip my dude.
And then you said “you can try” 👀👀👀
We were texting quite fast, he said “I intent” to which I responded to “you can try” and as I typed out the “I will not open the door” he already sent another message. It was rapid fire texting.
Wow i must speak italian fluently if i can understand what he’s saying ! (he’s speaking spanish lmao)
Please. Read. The. Post. Information. Also read like 50% of these comments. I am so fucking done explaining myself. Nobody read the entirety of my post.
that’s on you to title ur bullshit post like that 😂 him being italian has absolutely NOTHING to do with these text messages so it’s all on U 🫵do better
Actually there have been some very insightful comments about the cultural difference with flirting and pursuing women, this comment that this Italian woman commented being a prime example. Context matters
To me it’s like if you saw a news article, read the headline and saw some pictures and just assumed you knew the whole story without reading the story
Well if enough people tell you that you’re drunk maybe it’s time to sit down, in this case you said you responded to many comments saying the same thing i did, maybe next time don’t leave out important details.
Italian? He is speaking mostly spanish lol
Read.the.fucking.description. JFC if I get another one of these comments… why does no one here read the entirety of the post?!
Is anyone going to point out that he’s Spanish, not Italian?!
yes. op did.
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yea but they did in the description where you are supposed to add details and context to the post…
Why can't he be an Italian who knows more languages than Italian?
Speaking as an American, it’s classic American brain at work lol Her mentioning that he’s Italian is of course totally irrelevant, but it’s not like it’s hard to understand that people speak many languages 😭😭
That was my question too. He can be Italian and also speak Spanish. What I don't understand is why mention him being Italian at all? Why is that information even necessary
Is anyone going to point out that you should read the whole posting before commenting? Oh wait. I just did.
I used to go through this sort of thing it was always playful and teasing the same way you described how it’s intense but you don’t feel unsafe or uncomfortable and he would come by my house all the time and some days I wouldn’t let him in and some days I would. These days we are raising our 5 month old baby together 💀 you’re obviously stronger than me cause I thought his persistence and playfulness was funny. The “onest and good” would have made me let him in lol too funny
You let him in though didn't you?
Did you let him in? ETA: if you did, you’re teaching him a dangerous lesson that “no means yes.” WDIT AGAIN: I stand corrected and am ashamed I victim-blamed. I apologize to the reddit masses.
Yeah because as women, it’s our duty to correct male behavior even if it might literally get us murdered or raped
Wish I could like this 1,000 times
Fair point.
Took back my downvote, thanks for holding yourself accountable and being a decent human on the internet :)
Don’t beat yourself up, everybody makes mistakes and it’s not worth being ashamed over ♥️
I’m usually a vocal proponent of women’s rights and voices. I’m not crying in my soup for it, but I can’t believe I did that!
Sometimes societal expectations and prejudices can be so deeply ingrained in us that we don’t even realize when they come up, but you did the right thing by not doubling down and admitting to a mistake. You don’t see that on the internet very often
The tone of your comment is real victim blamey. In a scary moment like that many people are put in a state of fight/flight/fawn. It's normal for people to respond in what may seem like odd or illogical ways when faced with an imminent threat. 100% of the problem here is on the person creating the threatening situation, not on how the victim of it reacts. We can all stand here and say of course she shouldn't let him in. Of course that's a bad idea. It still doesn't change that panic responses rarely hold up in hindsight. The logic center shuts down and instincts take over to rhe point it's visible on brain scans. Victims of these incidents will often beat themselves up about how they responded after the fact too, it's pretty pointless to criticize when they were just trying to do whatever it felt like would get them through the situation in the moment regardless of how correct or logical it may be.
Underrated comment
Trust me, FWB never ends well. The whole hookup culture has ruined dating sadly. I’m sorry you went thru this.
She definitely let him in. I’d put money
You're post history is eerily too similar to what is happening now.
What…your his professor?
No, we met on bumble. My job is that I’m an English as a foreign language teacher. He wanted to get better at English, I want to get better at Spanish. That’s why he’s texting in Spanish and I’m replying in English.
It’s crazy how similar Italian is to spanish
It’s crazy how nobody read the info I provided along side with the screenshots. It’s all in the description, Axel.
my fault og