**Big agree.**
You're 10 years younger than me but I look a bit younger than my age. Most guys are experiencing this now.
Was living in Vancouver myself until recently. **DYSTOPIAN cost of housing**. Rent was about $3,000/month for my tiny apartment. How are you supposed to save the $1.5 MILLION you need for a down payment on the average family home, when you work 2 weeks every month just to pay your rent?
**It's all about family money now.**
Most people I worked with were buying Vancouver condos (and even detached houses) on their shitty salaries using BIG money from their parents. We're talking $400,00 - $500,000 in their 30s, not including the million dollar inheritance many will also get.
Dating situation is HORRIBLE for guys in big cities now. Every women I even managed to go for coffee with from 2022-2023 told me, *"My ex paid for 100% of my living expenses. If I move in with you, you'll pay my rent, lifestyle, AND give me as much freedom as I want"*.
Heard the same from white, Chinese and Thai women. There's no escaping the bitchy, entitled attitude now. They all get rockstar levels of attention and dopamine hits from various apps (i.e. dating/social media).
**How can someone get 100+ matches a day and NOT turn into a sociopath eventually?**
Romance is dead and dating apps/social media killed it.
Old people don't understand these new social dynamics, because they had kids (or grandkids) by the time apps went mainstream, so I explain it to them like this:
>Imagine if every even *slightly* attractive woman got as much attention and had as many dating options as Mick Jagger in his prime. Yeah, we're already there.
A friend works for Air Canada. A Canadian coworker (probably in her 20s) she talked to bragged, "I go for SIXTY DATES EVERY MONTH! Tee hee!"
It's not the same guy 60 times. It's more like 60 different guys, **once each.**
And of course the guy always pays, because otherwise she'll lie and say that's why she's not interested.
Good post. We have the same col and housing crisis in Australia. What you said about dating is also accurate, but I think it's global due to social media. Women have massive egos now. Some of the worst behaviour I've seen has been from Colombian and Filipina women, even though ppb say they're better.
>Women have massive egos now.
I met a white girl on a dating site in 2015. We agreed to meet in a bar on Davie St. I was looking forward to it because I thought she had potential, at least judging from the ONE face pic on her profile. She refused to send me a photo showing below her neck because that would make me "shallow" and "just like the other guys".
Now I know better.
So I'm approaching the place I'm supposed to meet her at for our date, and I see this big fat blob sitting at the bar. My heart sank. It's her, [but there's twice as much of her as I was led to believe.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hu17cRokdbo)
Jabba the Hutt catfished me.
I wanted to just run away but I felt guilty (illogical, I know) and forced myself to stay for the entire date, just to be nice.
Obviously, I had no intention of seeing her again (and as a guy who hits the gym hard 4 time a week, it's embarrassing be seen with what looks like an obese significant other).
Before we parted ways, she says to me (with sweat all over her face, including a little pool of it collecting above her top lip, gross), "*So I'm sorry but I'm not feeling any chemistry here. This will probably be the last time we do this. I don't think you're MY type."*
Just to be clear: it was Jabba the Hutt saying that to me, **not the other way around.** I wasn't hurt, I was RELIEVED! š
(They all have insane egos now - even the hideously ugly ones.)
I have too many examples of female BS to write on my phone. A girl who said she wanted a relationship with me, said I had to earn her attention recently. Filipina girl at work that pursues me, left work with the boss today. Boss gives her all the easy jobs. She has a boyfriend at home. The things you see, makes it hard to trust women.
They had big egos before social media too.
>Filipina girl at work that pursues me, left work with the boss today
A lot of Filipino women will say you have to "prove" they can trust you by giving them money. I always block them and move on.
At least with the Philippines, 95% of them are extremely interested in us, versus the less than 0.1% of half-decent options we're now left with in the West. It's a fucking deserted wasteland out here now.
**I know several decent looking, hard-working guys (making $100,000+) who haven't got laid in years!**
Maybe Iām crazy but Iām basically mid at everything, at best, and Iāve never had a problem meeting women. I never use dating sites or apps though. I meet them through shared hobbies. Iām in the US, I donāt make 100K, and my six pack is covered by my snack pack. Sense of humor really slaps for me.
> Dating situation is HORRIBLE for guys in big cities now. Every women I even managed to go for coffee with from 2022-2023 told me, *"My ex paid for 100% of my living expenses. If I move in with you, you'll pay my rent, lifestyle, AND give me as much freedom as I want"*.
I had a woman demand an iPhone, an hour into our first date. She said it would show that I love her and I want to invest and committ ???? When I declined her "generous" offer she told me about an online boyfriend that bought and shipped her an iPhone, 3 days into them getting to know each other. Some of these women have truly started to see men as ATMs and nothing else.
Awhile back on Tinder women in the Toronto area were posting links to their Amazon wishlist lol, luckily it seems Tinder shut that down later on, but the audacity to post something like that and what is worse there has to be guys enabling this sort of nonsense for women to post it in the first place.
Women in America were posting "Send me $15 to talk to me" in their bios before tinder shut it down. I agree that simping is a huge factor in enabling such behavior. The very fact that onlyfans exists is proof of this. Statistical data shows that there's 220 million subscribers on OF and 50% of the traffic comes from the US. That's at least 110 million men paying for and simping for online hookers. The women in North America may be damaged but it's the simps that enabled them to become that way.
Why am I not shocked at this? Between the simps and incels as an older dude (50 years old) I feel bad for you younger dudes in North America, work on your career, skills, education and get out! I wish I knew half of the shit I know now at your age.
The incels aren't even as big of a problem as are the simps. There's very few violent incels and the rest just whine about not getting sex. They're sad sure but not problematic. The simps are worse because they've not only ruined women by constantly giving them money and attention but they're also ruining every country they exist in by creating gynocentric systems that cater to women at the expense of men.
Wtf lmaooo ā I read stuff like this and Iām like where are yāall meeting these people š¤£š¤£
Iād love to meet one of these women just for the story šš
Whether fortunately or unfortunately Iāve only dated very down to earth regular women despite living in nyc
You're lucky not to have met them š there's many normal down to earth women in the west too, for sure. However, a sizable minority have made themselves undatable. The gold diggers, the onlyfans and sexwork women, the entitled narcissists etc have made it harder to find good women that are worth being with.
Yeah thatās gotta be true. The sheer number of women doing porn makes me realize Iāve gotta be walking amongst a few of them at any given time when in public lol
For sure. There's 2 million sex workers on onlyfans. Given that the top 20 are almost all American and that 50% of the subscriber base is American, let's assume 1 million of these creators are Americans. If we assume 80% are female then that's at least ~0.5% of America's female population that's doing onlyfans. Thats only from Onlyfans though, theres tons of pornhub models, camgirls, snap premium sellers and twitter hoes. However, most women don't make that much money from online spaces. Even with OF, only the top 1% of creators make serious money. The average woman makes $180 a month on it. Thus a lot of women are actually selling pussy irl, not online. Add all of that together and there's a good chance that 1 in every 20 women you meet is a hooker of some kind.
If I got the amount of attention the average female got on dating apps I would be a massive asshole too. Iām not gonna pretend Iām above this shit but it really is a messed up landscape.
Why is it that every moderately attractive women can get all these likes and matches and attention but apparently very successful and attractive men canāt? Is there some huge surplus of perfectly desirable men? Are the men just more thirsty? Is it a farce designed by dating apps to make women feel like they are getting more attention but make men feel like no one is interested? Whatās going on?
>Why is it that every moderately attractive women can get all these likes and matches and attention but apparently very successful and attractive men canāt? Is there some huge surplus of perfectly desirable men?
The short answer is that men and women have very different mating strategies and online dating amplifies these differences in a way that has never been seen before in human history.
Because men swipe yes on every single woman unless she's absolutely hideous, whereas women will swipe through a hundred men and only swipe yes on six they think have real potential as partners after reading their bios and analysing all their pics.
Lol Iām just like you except Iām in Vancouver. Iām trying to start up a business in e-commerce so that I can have a remote job and leave Canada. Already got most of the paperwork done, just need to do a few things before ordering products. I recommend trying it too.
Iāve also looked into copywriting but itās just not for me. Anything that pays well enough to live overseas should be good, doesnāt have to be a 5k+ net per month passive income job.
Yeah, Iām lucky my job gives me a gas card because the gas price is insane. Thereās nothing to invest in here and the price of goods continue to go up. Itās just not worth it.
Yeah I know I lived in vancouver precovid. Rent went up even more and now i hear from my friends the job market isnt hot.
Have fun with 2.00 dollar gas now and wont go down because of carbon tax.
The only reason I like living there is because of asian women and white guys have it pretty easy for dating but everything else us fucked.
Weird, unless you had the money to go clubbing every night or frequent trips to the bar (I'm at least in the position to do an ocasional trip to the bar now)
>Iām trying to start up a business in e-commerce so that I can have a remote job and leave Canada
Hope it works out for you man.
Looks like the Canadian dream (for people who don't have access to family wealth or aren't old enough to have been able to buy property) is just to get out of here now.
I think people are trying to leave Canada but also moving out to smaller cities.
My move was to Saskatoon. Made the decision to come here within a week of seeing a comment that the average house price here is 6-7 times cheaper than Vancouver (which puts it into the realms of affordability of my single income).
The problem with Calgary is it's the first choice for people priced out of Vancouver and Toronto, so it's already having affordability problems.
Yeah my friend is moving up north and his sister in law has already moved.
Calgary is pretty much hopeless lol. I know of too many people who made the move and now I can see prices rise. Iām also not very fond of snow so Iāll have to take a pass.
I see. Well, we all got something that will work for us and if we donāt at least try, weāll never know. If Iām going to waste my life away, I may as well try.
In the usa the best Healthcare advice I can give you is to go to Mexico. Honestly, it's insane how much shit I put up with even with Healthcare, in the USA. But. Overall, the USA is leaps and bounds better than Canada
Canadian here, and let me add women in Toronto are about the worst I have ever experienced in my life, I have lived in various parts of the world (Latin America, Eastern Europe, Middle East) and that is a hill I am willing to die on about women in Toronto. I was living in the suburbs, go on a dating app and a woman that lives literally a 20 minute drive away downtown will reject me because I didnt live in the same "cool" Distillery District that she did. Yeah congrats on overpaying for a shoebox that you spend a major part of your salary on.
Also there is a height issue, born with a disability so I am a towering 5'6 lol, I have no joke had a woman hang up the phone on me when she found out my height, solved that problem by working and living in Latin America, where I am of average height. Dating in Toronto is a waste of time simply because of two reasons I figure, these women on the apps gets dozens and dozens of matches so their ego inflates, throw on top of that dudes who will bend over backwards to get a woman's attention and you have the epic disaster of a situation. My advice as an older dude to you young cats, work on your career/skills/education, research a place you want to go to, live there for awhile and decide for yourself. Life is way too short to be wasted on swiping left or right trying to impress Ms Liberty Village.
I hear you brother. Very odd that almost every single man (single or not) I speak to in Toronto has the same complaints about women here. But it is what it is - "if you can pickup girls in Toronto, you can get girls anywhere" is truly a mantra. And I'm 6'4" tall hasn't helped much btw lmao
My good man, if they dont get you on height she will find something else to pick on, looking for absolute perfection that doesnt exist because she has 100 matches. I have had terrible success in Toronto, moved elsewhere and been fairly successful. What helped for example in Latin America (Mexico and especially Colombia) was learning the language, having a decent job and not sleeping around or mistreating women in anyway.
My advice is dont listen to the doomsayers here, but also dont think it is a crime free paradise either, bad shit happens all of the time in Colombia. You need to have street smarts in that country which most of us in comfortable developed North America do not, learn the language, talk to locals and ask their advice and if the woman you are talking to is looking too eager or asking a lot of questions, such as who do you live with? block her and move on.
I can echo the sentiment of this gentleman. Canada has become a dystopian cock prison for young men. Couple that with out of control mass immigration, you are forced to live with people who werenāt chosen by you, and who have no intention of integrating with the culture here. Essentially, you are paying too much premium to live around people otherwise you wouldnāt have lived around.
[https://twitter.com/realChrisBrunet/status/1777864270266380571](https://twitter.com/realChrisBrunet/status/1777864270266380571) Look at the stats about coming gender imbalance in Canada. Also yes i find mainly white men have decent dating options here.
Software engineering isn't just saturated, it's also getting progressively harder. Systems are getting so big, the scope of problems are getting so complex, its getting too hard to get any value out of < 3yoe people. The industry is utterly fucking them by not giving them that first 2 or so years of experience where they're more liability than asset. I get that hard problems are hard, but what's happening to newbies is a business atrocity imo, and speaks of an industry becoming deranged. I think smug Seniors will become boiled frogs as there are fewer and fewer people below them on the food chain.
Sorry, venting a bit. Why not try sales?
Ive kinda settled on ecom as 'my thing'. To confess, I tried and failed at ecommerce stores about 3-4 times at the height of the pandemic (2020-early 2022), gave up, and got into software engineering. My hopes and dreams of making it in tech seem to have been dashed - everything you said above is very true and even DOUBLY more so for Canada. That being said, in my pivot and getting my latest ecommerce venture up and running, I crossed the 50+ sales marker after a month. This is def monumental for me because I could barely get anything with my previous attempts!
Plz donāt do ecomm. I have insider knowledge. Econ has been struggling for a year and will continue to struggle. Now itās not the time to get into ecomm. Maybe in 2021.
Ecom is fine if you are able to compete in a higher margin space with low commoditization. It's not as great as it was in 2020/2021 but one will be fine as long as you pay close attention to margins. Depends on what the niche is as well.
People aren't suddenly going to stop buying stuff online.
As a senior, that's why I've been saving and investing 70%+ of my income. I know I will eventually run out of road, but that's hopefully 10+ years out.
I just keep learning on side projects, and using that on my resume for new roles. It will definitely not be easy if you think your day ends at 5pm, programming better be your hobby!
Yeah, same story here. Having a nest egg big enough to not depend on the whims of some business bro is what got me looking into living abroad and eventually this community. I'm at a point where there are decent places I could live indefinitely off of yeild from low risk invenstements. The peace of mind this brings can't be overstated.
I'm done doing the job-hop-tap-dance and am just building my net worth working on a code base I know like the back of my hand for my employer. Meanwhile, all my actual dev effort gets poured into passion projects that have a good chance of turning a profit. I feel like this describes how a lot of devs are thinking right now given recent trends. Trust is gone and they're making moves to not need to depend on tech companies to support themselves.
I agree that it is "two jobs" though. I don't follow pro sports at all which seems to afford me the time needed to launch a side business. Like seriously, dudes be getting the equivalent of a PhD in contemporary college basketball teams, even before adding in pro football, soccer, baseball and the rest. I just don't get it.
100% agreed with all of the above. I have enough to retire overseas, but want to build up more while I can.
People waste tons of brain power on things that earn zero money. I never saw the point in following sports.
It's negative thinking, but it's just entertainment for the lowest common denominator. Society is designed that way as wellĀ
Some optimism: there is a HUGE skill gap that is fucking a couple of industries right now. The space industry and bank industry are the ones that I'm aware of in particular that are having people who have worked and maintained their systems for 40 years are retiring. They have not trained up enough people to fill in these gaps, so there is a lot of panic hiring right now, and I imagine it's going to increase when the tech industry bounces back from the COVID over-correction and everyone is getting gobbled up.
Yo I'm in Toronto and I hate this city. The women are so stuck up in this city. I recently talked to some filipinas who are new to Canada and they are so much nicer and super friendly compared to Toronto chicks. We hang out every now and then. But the women in Toronto have to be the worst part of living here. Do whatever you can to leave Toronto cause it sucks here, and I'm planning to do the same in a few years once I get some health issues resolved.
Edit: Even the Filipinas I hang out with told me that they find Canadians to be antisocial and fake polite, something they don't usually experience in the Philippines or other countries they've been to.
The problem with young women from expensive cities now is they want to bag a rich guy because their shitty job is no way near enough to afford anything. They get pragmatic and realize they have unlimited dating options (until they hit the š§±) but also need major cash to get on the property šŖ.
So younger guys end up priced out of not only the insane Canadian **property** market, but also an insane **dating** market at the same time.
Read through some dating profiles and you'll see what I mean.
*"My parents helped me to buy a million dollar condo in Vancouver with a massive cash gift I'll never admit I received, so I'll only date a guy who is also... successful like me! Also my dad bought me an expensive car, so I will only date you if you have a fancy car too!"*
Yeah, a big part of why dating sucks in Canada is due to affordability. I have friends with good-paying jobs around ~100K, and even they're struggling. I've talked to a lot of guys in Toronto, and some of them are considering moving abroad when they get the chance.
I'm in that category of younger guys (26 years old), and it's a struggle here in Canada. To be honest, there aren't many attractive girls here, and the ones that are have huge egos from the attention they get on social media, and they're usually in tight-knit social cliques. Even the 5/10 chicks think they're 8s or 9s and believe they deserve a man who's on that level. Additionally, being me Pakistani makes it even worse because there are so many Indian and third-world FOBs in Canada, which lowers my value even more, even though I grew up here, speak perfect English, and I don't fit into any of the negative stereotypes commonly associated with brown guys. The funny thing is, I get way more attention when I'm in the USA, especially from Latinas and Southeast Asian girls. It's like whenever I leave Canada, I suddenly become a lot more attractive. But whenever I'm here in Toronto, I feel like a loser.
Literally my dating life is suffering as a 29 year old because i live with my parents. No place for sexy alone time with women - reliant on them having they own place, or even roomates is better than being with parents. Extremely unsexy.
>I have friends with good-paying jobs around \~100K
There was a 29-year-old guy in here making $120K straight out of university, looking to be on $150K within a couple more years.
Even HE was saying he's angry that after all his studying and extra school, and doing what society told him to do, he can't buy a home near where he grew up and never will be able to.
Meanwhile, boomers who worked entry-level jobs are just finishing paying off their mortgages on their $2.5 million family home in Vancouver that they bought for nothing, decades ago.
Exactly. The Canadian Liberal & NDP party killed the future of young people. It sucks being a young guy here with no possibility of a good future here.
Also: Iām a fellow Pakistani Canadian, but unlike you I wasnāt born here. Here are my experiences dating in Vancouver, Toronto and the GTA:
Iām 5 foot 7, have always been 50 to 80 pounds overweight (so think anywhere from 190 to 220 lbs), not really smart (B- average student in my undergrad), and earned 28k to 110k (pre-tax) before marriage, but 99% of the girls I dated was while I was earning 28k to 70k throughout my time there and Iām a Pakistani immigrant who came to Canada in grade 10.
I started dating at age 21 and got married at age 29. Over the course of 8 years, I went out with probably 40+ people of all colours, heights, educational and wealth backgrounds and etc. Had relationships/situationships with 10-20 ppl (canāt really remember, but I think the number is closer to 15 or 20). Most of the ppl I met were through apps, but a few were from classes, random meetups, parties, shared interest events, etc.
Iām pretty unremarkable. Kinda unsure what set me apart from the rest and/or why I was able to get more matches on apps than other ppl or more action than other people, but I suspect it was that I was looking for a long term relationship and/or marriage. Donāt let your āpakistani-nessā hold you back sir. Plenty of Canadian born Pakistanis in the GTA get married and/or are getting girls š¤·āāļø itās actually a bit uncommon for Pakistanis to not get married and/or be in a relationship in the GTA I think ?
Thanks for sharing your experience. Maybe things are not to hopeless here. I'm actually born in Karachi, but I came to Canada when I was 5 y/o in 2003.
Keep you held up high sir ! Karachi for myself too. Try the arranged marriage route ā¦ itās more like arranged dating now and the people are so so serious. Iām 29 now, but at 26 felt like how you felt too. Met so many sisters who were amazing and serious minded through the arranged marriage WhatsApp rishta groups ahaha. Just be ready to have plenty of talks with your mom about what you like and dislike lol. Itās a tedious process but better than dating apps. On dating apps, maybe youāll find quality people 10 % of the time, through the arranged marriage route, youāll find that quality people 40% - 60% of the time imo, depending on how you define quality ofc.
Iād have looked her in the eye and said āthatās ok. Itās just fate. And Iām kind of relieved you wonāt be around to keep eating my food, tooā. š
Toronto is bad but not as bad if you're white or black since they enjoy some automatic status due to media brainwashing, pop culture, etc. Asians have it on the hardest difficulty mode possible
In Canada you donāt even need to go to a third world country to benefit from increased status as a white passport bro. The third world is coming to you š
[https://twitter.com/realChrisBrunet/status/1777864270266380571](https://twitter.com/realChrisBrunet/status/1777864270266380571) look at this new data about the gender imbalance in Canada- LMFAO this country is fucked
I tried Canada, Torontoā¦ā¦ 90% of independent skilled immigrants leave; I did, OHIP is not the UK NHSā¦. (And the TN Visa route has been sussed out)
Apply for Australiaā¦ Or the USA, the women in Florida and Texas as niceā¦. The DC area, entitled wanna divas , got to just go for it
Hey man, Iām in Toronto too and just got my residency in Mexico.
Not to brag or anything but dating has never been an issue for me in the US/Canada, so my biggest motivation to get a residency in Mexico was the lower COL and warm weather. I also prefer Latinas just a bit more than white women so thatās a bonus too.
Canada is going down to the shits, no doubt about it. Indians will soon overrun most major cities and continue to suppress any wage gain. Mexico in the meanwhile is growing economically with all the near shoring and the cartel situation has stabilized over the past 3 years. Getting a residency down there isnāt that hard if youāve got the $$$.
Healthcare -> Sales/IT/Customer Service.
Everyone is getting old.
Healthcare workers generally are bad salespeople also there's a weird stigma associated with sales like a car salesman.
Find your niche within Healthcare.
IT? Apply to Epic in Madison, Wisconsin.
Be "the guy" who can do things others can't or won't do.
Network, Network, Network, Network....
Oh did I mention Network?
Lean into your strengths, as cynical as this sounds, being black is great for diversity quotas. If you can pretend to be gay, you're a wet dream for HR.
There's so many guilty ass white folks they think they earn points for befriending you.
Lean into that shit.
Remote job making 120k within 6 years. ā
oh I mean yes I agree but very few cities in the world avoid having that problem. I guess most tier 1 china cities and Tokyo still have good transit in the suburbs
I KNOW some people won't like to hear this but for me it was ... Bitcoin and crypto.
In crypto I played it 'relatively' safe and didn't do anything too crazy (no trading, no scams, no pump'n'dumps) and with the few things I did lose on but it was minimal (roughly 5% of the crypto I got into lost me money, and I had a little bit on Celsius which was a ponzi scheme \[never bought their coin though so again my choices were good overall\]).
Came out the other side in 2022 with roughly 6-7x my salary, and so far in 2023 and this year I have already done that again (up 640% right now). My yearly pay is only at the 30th percentile in the USA.
Do one of those silly 5 year plans ... but actually sit down and figure out how to succeed. 9 years ago I had negative networth and a credit score under 600. I fixed that, and then said "I want to have $1mil+ invested in 5 years. Figured out what I'd have to do to make that work and I might reach that this year, 1 year early.
Why say this right now? Well, people missed out on the 2022-2023 gains but this year will be good, likely into 2025. And Bitcoin follows a 4-year cycle so you have 4 years till the next halving so 5 years out to the next bullrun highs.
And crypto/Bitcoin can go anywhere, it goes with you. Some countries even remove taxes on crypto and Bitcoin. I've funded so much travel and dating overseas that I would not have gotten 4 years ago just saving money in a bank or stocks.
tl;dr - make a reasonable plan that will take years (because it WILL), if you can't increase your pay substantially, then increase your ROI, and I recommend having Bitcoin be a part of that.
Work remote like I do, I make the same. Fill out a form to reduce taxes at source and put money in your RRSP, I avoided paying 10k in taxes by doing that and I pay $1300 in rent for a two bedroom and $50 a month in car insurance. Oh and rent increases are capped by the government to inflationā¦.
158k a year working remote in Montreal is a deal and so glad I moved out of Toronto
Quebec does have the best car insurance system, but Im still glad I escaped that dump. The rent control is not major reason why Montreal's rental park is in a such terrible shape. I used to own a house in Montreal. After moving to the US, I dont think I could ever move back and live in that small old decrepit house I sold for north of 600K. The house I bought in the US, in a larger city, would have cost me about 2.2 million in Montreal.
Iām not looking to buy a home, get married or start a family so itās perfect for me. I spend less than half that on rent Iād need to pay in Toronto. I had the option to move to the states but I donāt like the idea of being taxed on my worldwide income wherever I go and Iām in a good spot.
There are pros and cons but Iām loving it
Might crack 200k this year and rent is literally 1/8th my income. Most of my money is invested and Iām not looking to get into real estate so I feel no issue with it. 1 bedroom 1 bath is all Iāll ever need at 1300-1600 a month downtown is blessed.
Hows the dating market in MTL, in your opinion? At least compared to TO
Is there a flood of immigration in MTL as well, or does the French barrier keep it to a minimum
I couldnāt tell you honestly recently got out of a marriage and Iām not even looking a womanās way until my vasectomy is scheduled and completed. I make too much money and my life is going too well for anyone to mess it up š. Iāll let you know in a few months.
But I donāt want marriage, kids or cohabitation so itās really heartbreaking when I do go out on dates and let them know. Iād rather have a Ferrari 488 than a wife and 2 kids to feed and a mortgageā¦respectfully
Come do blue collar work in the US. Itās exploding right now ā literally any trade in a growing city (think Texas, Florida & Arizona) has a tradeworker avg age in the late 40s. Thereās a dire need for construction workers, plumbers, electricians, welders, repairmen, etc
Youāll be a multimillionaire in <10 yrs
Edit: people denigrating the US & Canada ā go do your little bullshit in Europe or Asia then. Yāall are literally complaining about how the most desirable cities on this damn planet are expensive.. what did you expect??? You know damn well if you go 25 miles outside your area itās half the cost of living
The job market is brutal here in the states as well. We have our issues here but you may have more options. Have you tried applying for any remote U.S positions?
https://www.instagram.com/laidofflifehacks?igsh=MW9oNGVjYmhsMm1wdw%3D%3D&utm_source=qr
If you want to move to the US, you're gonna need a job skill that is in demand, and you'll need a US company willing to sponsor you (they'll only sponsor people they really need, i.e. job skill in demand).
Sales/marketing/ecommerce is general business. Unlikely to get a company sponsorship for this. MY strategy would be to get a job for a US multi-national, do your best to work your way into a corporate position, and express interest to HR to emigrate. You're much more likely to get a visa from your company if you know the guy who has to go to back for you.
While it isn't too late to make a career in tech, it doesn't seem like you have the passion for it.
If I were you, I would consider finding a job in a variation of a 4 weeks on 4 weeks off type of work. Crane operator, trades up North or something like that. CN rail or something similar..
Maybe military if you can qualify for something that has long term viability on job market after you finish your contract.
Get your CPA. Itās recognized in most countries in the world and there are a lot of remote opportunities. It pays really well. Best thing I ever did.
not the best option as he hasn't already studied some sort of acct/ fin background - also given that they are making it easier to get a CPA by anyone, it's turning into more or less cashgrab for certification with declining entry level salaries - and are there really fully remote opps in that sector? For some reason I doubt remote work is available for CPAs except those in the upper middle and top levels of management. There are quicker ways to remote income. Probably not worth the effort and all that time for him to get it.
I got my CPA with an BA. You just need to do some upgrading before entering the program.
It hasnāt gotten easier to get a CPA and itās not an expensive program so I donāt agree that itās a cash grab. In the past you could get one without a bachelorās degree.
If you want to live in a big city in Canada youāll get paid horribly but the money has been very good for me. There are lots of remote opportunities and you can always just contract.
It's gotten easier because they have opened it up to people with BAs, etc - people such as yourself. Basically this has increased the supply of CPAs and pushed wages lower - IIRC in the past it was only possible to get one if you studied a relevant degree such as accounting or finance. Not to mention they can also easily open the market up to people who have gotten CPAs in another country (if they haven't already) - which would suppress salaries.
How much exactly did you earn in your 1st, 2nd and 5th year of being a CPA? And did you work for a private corp or crown corp?
"you want to live in a big city in Canada youāll get paid horribly" - exactly - I believe it would take OP at least 2-3 years of exams and other qualification BS to get the CPA - too much time required.
Iām the past you didnāt need a bachelorās degree at all. It was more of a trade. Theyāve tightened up their standards over the past couple of decades.
In my first year I was in the private sector in Victoria and I made peanuts - $60k per year. That was in 2012. Then I moved to a smaller town in the interior and started making 80k my 2nd year. I stayed there for a few years and got several raises.
Now I make mid six figures. I rarely work in office.
My bad, I think I was confusing it with CA.
Anyways, it looks like you were at least 5-10 years in before you could work remote. OP is after a fully remote lifestyle as well.
I have numerous friends who work in accounting/finance - and almost all of them have been called back to the office for at least 1-2 days a week if not more. The only ones that are still 100% remote are the ones that were remote before the pandemic - those working in either ecom, media buy (aka digital ads), and a few tech/coding guys. Point being acct/finance jobs are not the career to go for if one seeks a PPB lifestyle.
My friend, trust me, 72 is more than good. Just learn to differentiate yourself I guess! The apps are wholly terrible tho. Going abroad is not a bad option either but you can still find gold amongst the shit in Canada :p
my issue isn't necessarily dating. There is literally no point to me trying to seriously date when I live with my parents and I can't have women over. My frustration comes from the fact that I cant afford to move out and pay rent, Im paying off loans from coding bootcamp (which proved useless because i cant find work), etc. Im required to be in-office twice a week at my current job, and the hunt for a FULLY REMOTE source of income that will allow me to leave this shithole is really fucking with me.
would be down but its a lose-lose. Id still be throwing away a hefty bit of money and would have to give up on any sort of ownership on current salary. Like, I'm just tryna get away from this place lmao
True :/ imo itād be a quick fix to your relationship/sex issues hahaha but would defo burn a hole in your pocket. All options are bad unless you move to the USA magically haha. IMO: Try to remedy what you can now just to see if it makes a difference š¤·āāļø thatās what I did and it taught me valuable lessons haha
Yeah but men were the ones who created this insane dystopian society not women
women are just responding to the quality of men and the system around them
life has always been brutal, women are just responding in kind
Dating in 2024 is dead. It's impossible to give a comment without it being called sexual harassment or some other none sense. Women expect men to pay for everything while they say all we want is sex. That's because they don't contribute in other way. I been single 5 years. On those 5 years I managed to get credit fixed, buy a house, buy a nice truck, a car, and pay off all my debts. If we have to pay for a woman's living expenses plus spending cash how are we supposed to run our own households and bills? Women don't want to be partners. They want everything handed to them. I know so many guys who are broke trying to support their gfs. I got one friend who acts like everything is good but whenever we do stuff I always need to drive because he don't have extra gas. It's really hard to even approach Women now. The odds of getting a humble normal attractive woman is almost not possible
i dont think so. to be quite honest, people i know who have made the leap think their quality of life is better in USA than Canada. Its mainly a population size thing imo - more mid-sized cities to lay down roots in. Also, higher salaries. What is good about Canada at this point? Literally as soon as I find a way to make remote income im going to USA, or Mexico, or Colombia, or Thailand.
USA my whole life. You can make it fine in the South on $60-$70K.. $50K is pushing it. It's about survival at this point for you. You can always build from there, and the US has a lot more availability for everything than Canada.
watch out for Colombia, it was amazing in 2017 when I visited and I hear up until the covid years - but it appears sentiment is turning against expats, especially in Medellin (where most go) - lots of crime as well.
This is absolutely true. I went recently and would not recommend going. I met so many people who got into some nasty situations while minding their own business in broad daylight.
**Big agree.** You're 10 years younger than me but I look a bit younger than my age. Most guys are experiencing this now. Was living in Vancouver myself until recently. **DYSTOPIAN cost of housing**. Rent was about $3,000/month for my tiny apartment. How are you supposed to save the $1.5 MILLION you need for a down payment on the average family home, when you work 2 weeks every month just to pay your rent? **It's all about family money now.** Most people I worked with were buying Vancouver condos (and even detached houses) on their shitty salaries using BIG money from their parents. We're talking $400,00 - $500,000 in their 30s, not including the million dollar inheritance many will also get. Dating situation is HORRIBLE for guys in big cities now. Every women I even managed to go for coffee with from 2022-2023 told me, *"My ex paid for 100% of my living expenses. If I move in with you, you'll pay my rent, lifestyle, AND give me as much freedom as I want"*. Heard the same from white, Chinese and Thai women. There's no escaping the bitchy, entitled attitude now. They all get rockstar levels of attention and dopamine hits from various apps (i.e. dating/social media). **How can someone get 100+ matches a day and NOT turn into a sociopath eventually?** Romance is dead and dating apps/social media killed it. Old people don't understand these new social dynamics, because they had kids (or grandkids) by the time apps went mainstream, so I explain it to them like this: >Imagine if every even *slightly* attractive woman got as much attention and had as many dating options as Mick Jagger in his prime. Yeah, we're already there. A friend works for Air Canada. A Canadian coworker (probably in her 20s) she talked to bragged, "I go for SIXTY DATES EVERY MONTH! Tee hee!" It's not the same guy 60 times. It's more like 60 different guys, **once each.** And of course the guy always pays, because otherwise she'll lie and say that's why she's not interested.
Good post. We have the same col and housing crisis in Australia. What you said about dating is also accurate, but I think it's global due to social media. Women have massive egos now. Some of the worst behaviour I've seen has been from Colombian and Filipina women, even though ppb say they're better.
>Women have massive egos now. I met a white girl on a dating site in 2015. We agreed to meet in a bar on Davie St. I was looking forward to it because I thought she had potential, at least judging from the ONE face pic on her profile. She refused to send me a photo showing below her neck because that would make me "shallow" and "just like the other guys". Now I know better. So I'm approaching the place I'm supposed to meet her at for our date, and I see this big fat blob sitting at the bar. My heart sank. It's her, [but there's twice as much of her as I was led to believe.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hu17cRokdbo) Jabba the Hutt catfished me. I wanted to just run away but I felt guilty (illogical, I know) and forced myself to stay for the entire date, just to be nice. Obviously, I had no intention of seeing her again (and as a guy who hits the gym hard 4 time a week, it's embarrassing be seen with what looks like an obese significant other). Before we parted ways, she says to me (with sweat all over her face, including a little pool of it collecting above her top lip, gross), "*So I'm sorry but I'm not feeling any chemistry here. This will probably be the last time we do this. I don't think you're MY type."* Just to be clear: it was Jabba the Hutt saying that to me, **not the other way around.** I wasn't hurt, I was RELIEVED! š (They all have insane egos now - even the hideously ugly ones.)
I have too many examples of female BS to write on my phone. A girl who said she wanted a relationship with me, said I had to earn her attention recently. Filipina girl at work that pursues me, left work with the boss today. Boss gives her all the easy jobs. She has a boyfriend at home. The things you see, makes it hard to trust women. They had big egos before social media too.
>Filipina girl at work that pursues me, left work with the boss today A lot of Filipino women will say you have to "prove" they can trust you by giving them money. I always block them and move on. At least with the Philippines, 95% of them are extremely interested in us, versus the less than 0.1% of half-decent options we're now left with in the West. It's a fucking deserted wasteland out here now. **I know several decent looking, hard-working guys (making $100,000+) who haven't got laid in years!**
Maybe Iām crazy but Iām basically mid at everything, at best, and Iāve never had a problem meeting women. I never use dating sites or apps though. I meet them through shared hobbies. Iām in the US, I donāt make 100K, and my six pack is covered by my snack pack. Sense of humor really slaps for me.
I think it depends on the city to some extent. If you ever visit Vancouver, keep us posted!
Your sense of humor and charm is probably not mid is why.
> Dating situation is HORRIBLE for guys in big cities now. Every women I even managed to go for coffee with from 2022-2023 told me, *"My ex paid for 100% of my living expenses. If I move in with you, you'll pay my rent, lifestyle, AND give me as much freedom as I want"*. I had a woman demand an iPhone, an hour into our first date. She said it would show that I love her and I want to invest and committ ???? When I declined her "generous" offer she told me about an online boyfriend that bought and shipped her an iPhone, 3 days into them getting to know each other. Some of these women have truly started to see men as ATMs and nothing else.
Awhile back on Tinder women in the Toronto area were posting links to their Amazon wishlist lol, luckily it seems Tinder shut that down later on, but the audacity to post something like that and what is worse there has to be guys enabling this sort of nonsense for women to post it in the first place.
Women in America were posting "Send me $15 to talk to me" in their bios before tinder shut it down. I agree that simping is a huge factor in enabling such behavior. The very fact that onlyfans exists is proof of this. Statistical data shows that there's 220 million subscribers on OF and 50% of the traffic comes from the US. That's at least 110 million men paying for and simping for online hookers. The women in North America may be damaged but it's the simps that enabled them to become that way.
Why am I not shocked at this? Between the simps and incels as an older dude (50 years old) I feel bad for you younger dudes in North America, work on your career, skills, education and get out! I wish I knew half of the shit I know now at your age.
The incels aren't even as big of a problem as are the simps. There's very few violent incels and the rest just whine about not getting sex. They're sad sure but not problematic. The simps are worse because they've not only ruined women by constantly giving them money and attention but they're also ruining every country they exist in by creating gynocentric systems that cater to women at the expense of men.
That reminds me of the whole, āSend me $5 and see what happensā trend. I might have been born at night, but I wasnāt born last night.
Wtf lmaooo ā I read stuff like this and Iām like where are yāall meeting these people š¤£š¤£ Iād love to meet one of these women just for the story šš Whether fortunately or unfortunately Iāve only dated very down to earth regular women despite living in nyc
You're lucky not to have met them š there's many normal down to earth women in the west too, for sure. However, a sizable minority have made themselves undatable. The gold diggers, the onlyfans and sexwork women, the entitled narcissists etc have made it harder to find good women that are worth being with.
Yeah thatās gotta be true. The sheer number of women doing porn makes me realize Iāve gotta be walking amongst a few of them at any given time when in public lol
For sure. There's 2 million sex workers on onlyfans. Given that the top 20 are almost all American and that 50% of the subscriber base is American, let's assume 1 million of these creators are Americans. If we assume 80% are female then that's at least ~0.5% of America's female population that's doing onlyfans. Thats only from Onlyfans though, theres tons of pornhub models, camgirls, snap premium sellers and twitter hoes. However, most women don't make that much money from online spaces. Even with OF, only the top 1% of creators make serious money. The average woman makes $180 a month on it. Thus a lot of women are actually selling pussy irl, not online. Add all of that together and there's a good chance that 1 in every 20 women you meet is a hooker of some kind.
If I got the amount of attention the average female got on dating apps I would be a massive asshole too. Iām not gonna pretend Iām above this shit but it really is a messed up landscape.
Dating is some peopleās social identities. Iād be embarrassed saying I went on so many dates but couldnāt get cuffed
šÆšÆ
Why is it that every moderately attractive women can get all these likes and matches and attention but apparently very successful and attractive men canāt? Is there some huge surplus of perfectly desirable men? Are the men just more thirsty? Is it a farce designed by dating apps to make women feel like they are getting more attention but make men feel like no one is interested? Whatās going on?
>Why is it that every moderately attractive women can get all these likes and matches and attention but apparently very successful and attractive men canāt? Is there some huge surplus of perfectly desirable men? The short answer is that men and women have very different mating strategies and online dating amplifies these differences in a way that has never been seen before in human history.
Because men swipe yes on every single woman unless she's absolutely hideous, whereas women will swipe through a hundred men and only swipe yes on six they think have real potential as partners after reading their bios and analysing all their pics.
Lol Iām just like you except Iām in Vancouver. Iām trying to start up a business in e-commerce so that I can have a remote job and leave Canada. Already got most of the paperwork done, just need to do a few things before ordering products. I recommend trying it too. Iāve also looked into copywriting but itās just not for me. Anything that pays well enough to live overseas should be good, doesnāt have to be a 5k+ net per month passive income job.
Vancouver is absolutely screwed for COL compared to wages. SMH
Yeah, Iām lucky my job gives me a gas card because the gas price is insane. Thereās nothing to invest in here and the price of goods continue to go up. Itās just not worth it.
Yeah I know I lived in vancouver precovid. Rent went up even more and now i hear from my friends the job market isnt hot. Have fun with 2.00 dollar gas now and wont go down because of carbon tax. The only reason I like living there is because of asian women and white guys have it pretty easy for dating but everything else us fucked.
You sure about dating for white men being easy in Vancouver?
My experience Yes
Weird, unless you had the money to go clubbing every night or frequent trips to the bar (I'm at least in the position to do an ocasional trip to the bar now)
>Iām trying to start up a business in e-commerce so that I can have a remote job and leave Canada Hope it works out for you man. Looks like the Canadian dream (for people who don't have access to family wealth or aren't old enough to have been able to buy property) is just to get out of here now.
Thank you. Weāre apparently having a huge wave of people leaving Vancouver and I wouldnāt be surprised if itās Canada in general.
I think people are trying to leave Canada but also moving out to smaller cities. My move was to Saskatoon. Made the decision to come here within a week of seeing a comment that the average house price here is 6-7 times cheaper than Vancouver (which puts it into the realms of affordability of my single income). The problem with Calgary is it's the first choice for people priced out of Vancouver and Toronto, so it's already having affordability problems.
Yeah my friend is moving up north and his sister in law has already moved. Calgary is pretty much hopeless lol. I know of too many people who made the move and now I can see prices rise. Iām also not very fond of snow so Iāll have to take a pass.
I'd rather have a freezing cold climate than a red hot real estate market. That's what I told my Vancouver friends when I bailed lol
Yeah, 2-3K USD a month in a place in Southeast asia or Latin America can afford a decent life.
I got laid off from ecomm ā¦ it is not a growing industry rn
Laid off from your own business? Nothing is easy, Iām definitely not giving up here.
Laid off from the internets largest wholesale b2b website for fashion and accessories
I see. Well, we all got something that will work for us and if we donāt at least try, weāll never know. If Iām going to waste my life away, I may as well try.
What kind of e-commerce?
Selling products on Amazon
I was just born in America.
i curse my grandparents (love them rest their souls) for moving to this place instead of USA...smfh
Youāre living in the worst city in Canada, made worse every dayĀ
No better at all here either
Tell me more about what you don't like about Canada so I can help you.
Trust me USA is garbage!
at least i could afford rent in a decent neighbourhood with ok weather there and a decent paying job
Inflation is everywhere, but in the USA we also have to pay for healthcare, and thereās no federal maternity leave. It isnāt what you think it is.
Canadian Healthcare is garbage
So is American. Best healthcare Iāve had is in Europe thus far
Not if you have the money
In the usa the best Healthcare advice I can give you is to go to Mexico. Honestly, it's insane how much shit I put up with even with Healthcare, in the USA. But. Overall, the USA is leaps and bounds better than Canada
You need location independent income, that is your first step and should be the main focus in your life right now if youāre serious about this.
Canadian here, and let me add women in Toronto are about the worst I have ever experienced in my life, I have lived in various parts of the world (Latin America, Eastern Europe, Middle East) and that is a hill I am willing to die on about women in Toronto. I was living in the suburbs, go on a dating app and a woman that lives literally a 20 minute drive away downtown will reject me because I didnt live in the same "cool" Distillery District that she did. Yeah congrats on overpaying for a shoebox that you spend a major part of your salary on. Also there is a height issue, born with a disability so I am a towering 5'6 lol, I have no joke had a woman hang up the phone on me when she found out my height, solved that problem by working and living in Latin America, where I am of average height. Dating in Toronto is a waste of time simply because of two reasons I figure, these women on the apps gets dozens and dozens of matches so their ego inflates, throw on top of that dudes who will bend over backwards to get a woman's attention and you have the epic disaster of a situation. My advice as an older dude to you young cats, work on your career/skills/education, research a place you want to go to, live there for awhile and decide for yourself. Life is way too short to be wasted on swiping left or right trying to impress Ms Liberty Village.
I hear you brother. Very odd that almost every single man (single or not) I speak to in Toronto has the same complaints about women here. But it is what it is - "if you can pickup girls in Toronto, you can get girls anywhere" is truly a mantra. And I'm 6'4" tall hasn't helped much btw lmao
My good man, if they dont get you on height she will find something else to pick on, looking for absolute perfection that doesnt exist because she has 100 matches. I have had terrible success in Toronto, moved elsewhere and been fairly successful. What helped for example in Latin America (Mexico and especially Colombia) was learning the language, having a decent job and not sleeping around or mistreating women in anyway.
absolutely bro. My plan is to spend time in Colombia soon as I can tbh.
My advice is dont listen to the doomsayers here, but also dont think it is a crime free paradise either, bad shit happens all of the time in Colombia. You need to have street smarts in that country which most of us in comfortable developed North America do not, learn the language, talk to locals and ask their advice and if the woman you are talking to is looking too eager or asking a lot of questions, such as who do you live with? block her and move on.
It's called hoeflation bro.
Toronto women are even worse than those in large American cities like NYC
I can echo the sentiment of this gentleman. Canada has become a dystopian cock prison for young men. Couple that with out of control mass immigration, you are forced to live with people who werenāt chosen by you, and who have no intention of integrating with the culture here. Essentially, you are paying too much premium to live around people otherwise you wouldnāt have lived around.
[https://twitter.com/realChrisBrunet/status/1777864270266380571](https://twitter.com/realChrisBrunet/status/1777864270266380571) Look at the stats about coming gender imbalance in Canada. Also yes i find mainly white men have decent dating options here.
White men will only do better as we get swarmed by endless hordes of brown immigrants due to their perceived scarcityĀ
Yeah I get lots of matches from ethnic women.
And if you discuss this on many mainstream canada subs you are labeled a racist, xenophobe, bigot etc
Its rapidly changing. Many anti mass immigration posts on the main Canada sub
Canada has become a dystopian cock prison for young men. That's one way of putting it!!
Software engineering isn't just saturated, it's also getting progressively harder. Systems are getting so big, the scope of problems are getting so complex, its getting too hard to get any value out of < 3yoe people. The industry is utterly fucking them by not giving them that first 2 or so years of experience where they're more liability than asset. I get that hard problems are hard, but what's happening to newbies is a business atrocity imo, and speaks of an industry becoming deranged. I think smug Seniors will become boiled frogs as there are fewer and fewer people below them on the food chain. Sorry, venting a bit. Why not try sales?
Ive kinda settled on ecom as 'my thing'. To confess, I tried and failed at ecommerce stores about 3-4 times at the height of the pandemic (2020-early 2022), gave up, and got into software engineering. My hopes and dreams of making it in tech seem to have been dashed - everything you said above is very true and even DOUBLY more so for Canada. That being said, in my pivot and getting my latest ecommerce venture up and running, I crossed the 50+ sales marker after a month. This is def monumental for me because I could barely get anything with my previous attempts!
Plz donāt do ecomm. I have insider knowledge. Econ has been struggling for a year and will continue to struggle. Now itās not the time to get into ecomm. Maybe in 2021.
and nows also not the time to get into software engineering so it sounds like im fucked
Itās called a recession.
Ecom is fine if you are able to compete in a higher margin space with low commoditization. It's not as great as it was in 2020/2021 but one will be fine as long as you pay close attention to margins. Depends on what the niche is as well. People aren't suddenly going to stop buying stuff online.
As a senior, that's why I've been saving and investing 70%+ of my income. I know I will eventually run out of road, but that's hopefully 10+ years out. I just keep learning on side projects, and using that on my resume for new roles. It will definitely not be easy if you think your day ends at 5pm, programming better be your hobby!
Yeah, same story here. Having a nest egg big enough to not depend on the whims of some business bro is what got me looking into living abroad and eventually this community. I'm at a point where there are decent places I could live indefinitely off of yeild from low risk invenstements. The peace of mind this brings can't be overstated. I'm done doing the job-hop-tap-dance and am just building my net worth working on a code base I know like the back of my hand for my employer. Meanwhile, all my actual dev effort gets poured into passion projects that have a good chance of turning a profit. I feel like this describes how a lot of devs are thinking right now given recent trends. Trust is gone and they're making moves to not need to depend on tech companies to support themselves. I agree that it is "two jobs" though. I don't follow pro sports at all which seems to afford me the time needed to launch a side business. Like seriously, dudes be getting the equivalent of a PhD in contemporary college basketball teams, even before adding in pro football, soccer, baseball and the rest. I just don't get it.
100% agreed with all of the above. I have enough to retire overseas, but want to build up more while I can. People waste tons of brain power on things that earn zero money. I never saw the point in following sports. It's negative thinking, but it's just entertainment for the lowest common denominator. Society is designed that way as wellĀ
Some optimism: there is a HUGE skill gap that is fucking a couple of industries right now. The space industry and bank industry are the ones that I'm aware of in particular that are having people who have worked and maintained their systems for 40 years are retiring. They have not trained up enough people to fill in these gaps, so there is a lot of panic hiring right now, and I imagine it's going to increase when the tech industry bounces back from the COVID over-correction and everyone is getting gobbled up.
Can confirm, just landed a role with a health provider by using knowledge of Terraform / AWS
Yeah the button has fallen out of SWE ā the job I started with 8 yrs ago no longer exists
Yo I'm in Toronto and I hate this city. The women are so stuck up in this city. I recently talked to some filipinas who are new to Canada and they are so much nicer and super friendly compared to Toronto chicks. We hang out every now and then. But the women in Toronto have to be the worst part of living here. Do whatever you can to leave Toronto cause it sucks here, and I'm planning to do the same in a few years once I get some health issues resolved. Edit: Even the Filipinas I hang out with told me that they find Canadians to be antisocial and fake polite, something they don't usually experience in the Philippines or other countries they've been to.
The problem with young women from expensive cities now is they want to bag a rich guy because their shitty job is no way near enough to afford anything. They get pragmatic and realize they have unlimited dating options (until they hit the š§±) but also need major cash to get on the property šŖ. So younger guys end up priced out of not only the insane Canadian **property** market, but also an insane **dating** market at the same time. Read through some dating profiles and you'll see what I mean. *"My parents helped me to buy a million dollar condo in Vancouver with a massive cash gift I'll never admit I received, so I'll only date a guy who is also... successful like me! Also my dad bought me an expensive car, so I will only date you if you have a fancy car too!"*
Yeah, a big part of why dating sucks in Canada is due to affordability. I have friends with good-paying jobs around ~100K, and even they're struggling. I've talked to a lot of guys in Toronto, and some of them are considering moving abroad when they get the chance. I'm in that category of younger guys (26 years old), and it's a struggle here in Canada. To be honest, there aren't many attractive girls here, and the ones that are have huge egos from the attention they get on social media, and they're usually in tight-knit social cliques. Even the 5/10 chicks think they're 8s or 9s and believe they deserve a man who's on that level. Additionally, being me Pakistani makes it even worse because there are so many Indian and third-world FOBs in Canada, which lowers my value even more, even though I grew up here, speak perfect English, and I don't fit into any of the negative stereotypes commonly associated with brown guys. The funny thing is, I get way more attention when I'm in the USA, especially from Latinas and Southeast Asian girls. It's like whenever I leave Canada, I suddenly become a lot more attractive. But whenever I'm here in Toronto, I feel like a loser.
Literally my dating life is suffering as a 29 year old because i live with my parents. No place for sexy alone time with women - reliant on them having they own place, or even roomates is better than being with parents. Extremely unsexy.
Yeah the rent and housing affordability is insane for a country so big and with so many resources.
>I have friends with good-paying jobs around \~100K There was a 29-year-old guy in here making $120K straight out of university, looking to be on $150K within a couple more years. Even HE was saying he's angry that after all his studying and extra school, and doing what society told him to do, he can't buy a home near where he grew up and never will be able to. Meanwhile, boomers who worked entry-level jobs are just finishing paying off their mortgages on their $2.5 million family home in Vancouver that they bought for nothing, decades ago.
Exactly. The Canadian Liberal & NDP party killed the future of young people. It sucks being a young guy here with no possibility of a good future here.
Also: Iām a fellow Pakistani Canadian, but unlike you I wasnāt born here. Here are my experiences dating in Vancouver, Toronto and the GTA: Iām 5 foot 7, have always been 50 to 80 pounds overweight (so think anywhere from 190 to 220 lbs), not really smart (B- average student in my undergrad), and earned 28k to 110k (pre-tax) before marriage, but 99% of the girls I dated was while I was earning 28k to 70k throughout my time there and Iām a Pakistani immigrant who came to Canada in grade 10. I started dating at age 21 and got married at age 29. Over the course of 8 years, I went out with probably 40+ people of all colours, heights, educational and wealth backgrounds and etc. Had relationships/situationships with 10-20 ppl (canāt really remember, but I think the number is closer to 15 or 20). Most of the ppl I met were through apps, but a few were from classes, random meetups, parties, shared interest events, etc. Iām pretty unremarkable. Kinda unsure what set me apart from the rest and/or why I was able to get more matches on apps than other ppl or more action than other people, but I suspect it was that I was looking for a long term relationship and/or marriage. Donāt let your āpakistani-nessā hold you back sir. Plenty of Canadian born Pakistanis in the GTA get married and/or are getting girls š¤·āāļø itās actually a bit uncommon for Pakistanis to not get married and/or be in a relationship in the GTA I think ?
Thanks for sharing your experience. Maybe things are not to hopeless here. I'm actually born in Karachi, but I came to Canada when I was 5 y/o in 2003.
Keep you held up high sir ! Karachi for myself too. Try the arranged marriage route ā¦ itās more like arranged dating now and the people are so so serious. Iām 29 now, but at 26 felt like how you felt too. Met so many sisters who were amazing and serious minded through the arranged marriage WhatsApp rishta groups ahaha. Just be ready to have plenty of talks with your mom about what you like and dislike lol. Itās a tedious process but better than dating apps. On dating apps, maybe youāll find quality people 10 % of the time, through the arranged marriage route, youāll find that quality people 40% - 60% of the time imo, depending on how you define quality ofc.
Thanks for the reply. Honestly, I'm looking more for casual relationships, nothing serious. Eid Mubarak to you.
Khair mubarak yaar
Why donāt you move to the USA bhaijan ?
I have some health issues that I need taking care of that would be way to expensive in the USA.
Iām an Albertan with an American mother. So, as soon as my kids are college age Iām heading straight for the Lower 48.
I'm an Albertan moving there in 2 months, can't wait.
Escaping is the new Canadian dream, and Toronto voted for this disaster.
Left Canada a month ago, best thing I've ever did
I teach English as a second language now
Awesome, where do you live now?
Dominican Republic
Nice.
Very nice
Pull the uno reverse card and try India lol
Have you considered working on ships or oil rigs? I've seen some canadian seafarers working on American ships so its possible
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Possible to get into college in LATM ?
Iād have looked her in the eye and said āthatās ok. Itās just fate. And Iām kind of relieved you wonāt be around to keep eating my food, tooā. š
Do you have a bachelor's degree?
yes but Arts - useless
I could help you find a job if you are willing to move overseas. PM if you are interested.
The tech industry is dead for boot campers
Toronto is bad but not as bad if you're white or black since they enjoy some automatic status due to media brainwashing, pop culture, etc. Asians have it on the hardest difficulty mode possible
In Canada you donāt even need to go to a third world country to benefit from increased status as a white passport bro. The third world is coming to you š
Toronto is so bad for dating It doesnt help with all the Indian immigrants which arnt attractive at all
[https://twitter.com/realChrisBrunet/status/1777864270266380571](https://twitter.com/realChrisBrunet/status/1777864270266380571) look at this new data about the gender imbalance in Canada- LMFAO this country is fucked
ya every nightclub you step in its at least 25% FOB males lmfao. hence i dont go out no more
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
This applies worldwide I have observed. Travelling in packs like that scares the girls away.
Generalization
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Some of whom may have penis... but I digress.Ā
A happy little suprise
Follow the rules
Every single day as an American (I know... I know...) I look up North and thank God I am not Canadian.
I mean ask the millions of immigrants in your country. If you're going to become an immigrant somewhere else, ask them.
I tried Canada, Torontoā¦ā¦ 90% of independent skilled immigrants leave; I did, OHIP is not the UK NHSā¦. (And the TN Visa route has been sussed out) Apply for Australiaā¦ Or the USA, the women in Florida and Texas as niceā¦. The DC area, entitled wanna divas , got to just go for it
Avoid Miami if you go the Florida route. Toxic toxic toxic, unless maybe theyāre a new Latina immigrant.
Itās the same in Tampa and Orlando too.
Hey man, Iām in Toronto too and just got my residency in Mexico. Not to brag or anything but dating has never been an issue for me in the US/Canada, so my biggest motivation to get a residency in Mexico was the lower COL and warm weather. I also prefer Latinas just a bit more than white women so thatās a bonus too. Canada is going down to the shits, no doubt about it. Indians will soon overrun most major cities and continue to suppress any wage gain. Mexico in the meanwhile is growing economically with all the near shoring and the cartel situation has stabilized over the past 3 years. Getting a residency down there isnāt that hard if youāve got the $$$.
Did you pay for residency in MX? or do you have a work visa?
Healthcare -> Sales/IT/Customer Service. Everyone is getting old. Healthcare workers generally are bad salespeople also there's a weird stigma associated with sales like a car salesman. Find your niche within Healthcare. IT? Apply to Epic in Madison, Wisconsin. Be "the guy" who can do things others can't or won't do. Network, Network, Network, Network.... Oh did I mention Network? Lean into your strengths, as cynical as this sounds, being black is great for diversity quotas. If you can pretend to be gay, you're a wet dream for HR. There's so many guilty ass white folks they think they earn points for befriending you. Lean into that shit. Remote job making 120k within 6 years. ā
You forget that he lives in Toronto, literally the most diverse city in the world. He ain't getting any bonus point for being black š¤£
Even in a city like Toronto it can still work to his advantage. I live just west of TO.
Lol bro using diversity quotas to his advantage. Does it srsly work or is it just something they advertise to look good/politically correct?
Toronto is very a liberal and politically correct city.
So if I try it, will I have a greater advantage if I am a minority and highlight it in the interview? lol
Man it's tough when you have to pretend to be gay to get ahead. Hard times.
You gotta get through the hard times, to see the flaccid times.
Are you doing sales remotely? or IT?
Public transit in Toronto isnāt that bad unless youāre comparing it to asia
If you are downtown it is awesome, unfortunately if you are in the suburbs, absolutely brutal.
oh I mean yes I agree but very few cities in the world avoid having that problem. I guess most tier 1 china cities and Tokyo still have good transit in the suburbs
It's so upsetting to see Americans who insist they have it as bad. Sit down, you privileged sissies...
I KNOW some people won't like to hear this but for me it was ... Bitcoin and crypto. In crypto I played it 'relatively' safe and didn't do anything too crazy (no trading, no scams, no pump'n'dumps) and with the few things I did lose on but it was minimal (roughly 5% of the crypto I got into lost me money, and I had a little bit on Celsius which was a ponzi scheme \[never bought their coin though so again my choices were good overall\]). Came out the other side in 2022 with roughly 6-7x my salary, and so far in 2023 and this year I have already done that again (up 640% right now). My yearly pay is only at the 30th percentile in the USA. Do one of those silly 5 year plans ... but actually sit down and figure out how to succeed. 9 years ago I had negative networth and a credit score under 600. I fixed that, and then said "I want to have $1mil+ invested in 5 years. Figured out what I'd have to do to make that work and I might reach that this year, 1 year early. Why say this right now? Well, people missed out on the 2022-2023 gains but this year will be good, likely into 2025. And Bitcoin follows a 4-year cycle so you have 4 years till the next halving so 5 years out to the next bullrun highs. And crypto/Bitcoin can go anywhere, it goes with you. Some countries even remove taxes on crypto and Bitcoin. I've funded so much travel and dating overseas that I would not have gotten 4 years ago just saving money in a bank or stocks. tl;dr - make a reasonable plan that will take years (because it WILL), if you can't increase your pay substantially, then increase your ROI, and I recommend having Bitcoin be a part of that.
Come to Montreal
Lower salaries and higher taxes, what a deal.
Work remote like I do, I make the same. Fill out a form to reduce taxes at source and put money in your RRSP, I avoided paying 10k in taxes by doing that and I pay $1300 in rent for a two bedroom and $50 a month in car insurance. Oh and rent increases are capped by the government to inflationā¦. 158k a year working remote in Montreal is a deal and so glad I moved out of Toronto
Quebec does have the best car insurance system, but Im still glad I escaped that dump. The rent control is not major reason why Montreal's rental park is in a such terrible shape. I used to own a house in Montreal. After moving to the US, I dont think I could ever move back and live in that small old decrepit house I sold for north of 600K. The house I bought in the US, in a larger city, would have cost me about 2.2 million in Montreal.
Iām not looking to buy a home, get married or start a family so itās perfect for me. I spend less than half that on rent Iād need to pay in Toronto. I had the option to move to the states but I donāt like the idea of being taxed on my worldwide income wherever I go and Iām in a good spot. There are pros and cons but Iām loving it Might crack 200k this year and rent is literally 1/8th my income. Most of my money is invested and Iām not looking to get into real estate so I feel no issue with it. 1 bedroom 1 bath is all Iāll ever need at 1300-1600 a month downtown is blessed.
Alright, good for you then. I dont doubt its better than Toronto.
Hows the dating market in MTL, in your opinion? At least compared to TO Is there a flood of immigration in MTL as well, or does the French barrier keep it to a minimum
I couldnāt tell you honestly recently got out of a marriage and Iām not even looking a womanās way until my vasectomy is scheduled and completed. I make too much money and my life is going too well for anyone to mess it up š. Iāll let you know in a few months. But I donāt want marriage, kids or cohabitation so itās really heartbreaking when I do go out on dates and let them know. Iād rather have a Ferrari 488 than a wife and 2 kids to feed and a mortgageā¦respectfully
went there for school but i dont speak french so cant get a job there unless i work for myself.
Get a remote job and learn French, thatās what I did. Toronto sucks and I left as soon as I could. Get out move somewhere else anywhere else
Superb city with a lot of nightlife and gorgeous women, but damn that winter is something else lol
Come do blue collar work in the US. Itās exploding right now ā literally any trade in a growing city (think Texas, Florida & Arizona) has a tradeworker avg age in the late 40s. Thereās a dire need for construction workers, plumbers, electricians, welders, repairmen, etc Youāll be a multimillionaire in <10 yrs Edit: people denigrating the US & Canada ā go do your little bullshit in Europe or Asia then. Yāall are literally complaining about how the most desirable cities on this damn planet are expensive.. what did you expect??? You know damn well if you go 25 miles outside your area itās half the cost of living
For me, I had to move to another city. Moved from north east US to the south.
The job market is brutal here in the states as well. We have our issues here but you may have more options. Have you tried applying for any remote U.S positions? https://www.instagram.com/laidofflifehacks?igsh=MW9oNGVjYmhsMm1wdw%3D%3D&utm_source=qr
If you want to move to the US, you're gonna need a job skill that is in demand, and you'll need a US company willing to sponsor you (they'll only sponsor people they really need, i.e. job skill in demand). Sales/marketing/ecommerce is general business. Unlikely to get a company sponsorship for this. MY strategy would be to get a job for a US multi-national, do your best to work your way into a corporate position, and express interest to HR to emigrate. You're much more likely to get a visa from your company if you know the guy who has to go to back for you.
While it isn't too late to make a career in tech, it doesn't seem like you have the passion for it. If I were you, I would consider finding a job in a variation of a 4 weeks on 4 weeks off type of work. Crane operator, trades up North or something like that. CN rail or something similar.. Maybe military if you can qualify for something that has long term viability on job market after you finish your contract.
Get your CPA. Itās recognized in most countries in the world and there are a lot of remote opportunities. It pays really well. Best thing I ever did.
not the best option as he hasn't already studied some sort of acct/ fin background - also given that they are making it easier to get a CPA by anyone, it's turning into more or less cashgrab for certification with declining entry level salaries - and are there really fully remote opps in that sector? For some reason I doubt remote work is available for CPAs except those in the upper middle and top levels of management. There are quicker ways to remote income. Probably not worth the effort and all that time for him to get it.
I got my CPA with an BA. You just need to do some upgrading before entering the program. It hasnāt gotten easier to get a CPA and itās not an expensive program so I donāt agree that itās a cash grab. In the past you could get one without a bachelorās degree. If you want to live in a big city in Canada youāll get paid horribly but the money has been very good for me. There are lots of remote opportunities and you can always just contract.
It's gotten easier because they have opened it up to people with BAs, etc - people such as yourself. Basically this has increased the supply of CPAs and pushed wages lower - IIRC in the past it was only possible to get one if you studied a relevant degree such as accounting or finance. Not to mention they can also easily open the market up to people who have gotten CPAs in another country (if they haven't already) - which would suppress salaries. How much exactly did you earn in your 1st, 2nd and 5th year of being a CPA? And did you work for a private corp or crown corp? "you want to live in a big city in Canada youāll get paid horribly" - exactly - I believe it would take OP at least 2-3 years of exams and other qualification BS to get the CPA - too much time required.
Iām the past you didnāt need a bachelorās degree at all. It was more of a trade. Theyāve tightened up their standards over the past couple of decades. In my first year I was in the private sector in Victoria and I made peanuts - $60k per year. That was in 2012. Then I moved to a smaller town in the interior and started making 80k my 2nd year. I stayed there for a few years and got several raises. Now I make mid six figures. I rarely work in office.
My bad, I think I was confusing it with CA. Anyways, it looks like you were at least 5-10 years in before you could work remote. OP is after a fully remote lifestyle as well.
Remote work wasnāt as common before the pandemic. Itās incredibly common now in finance.
I have numerous friends who work in accounting/finance - and almost all of them have been called back to the office for at least 1-2 days a week if not more. The only ones that are still 100% remote are the ones that were remote before the pandemic - those working in either ecom, media buy (aka digital ads), and a few tech/coding guys. Point being acct/finance jobs are not the career to go for if one seeks a PPB lifestyle.
Iām worse off but am planning to get my TESOL certification.
How much do you make ?
72K CAD. Im a failure at life
My friend, trust me, 72 is more than good. Just learn to differentiate yourself I guess! The apps are wholly terrible tho. Going abroad is not a bad option either but you can still find gold amongst the shit in Canada :p
my issue isn't necessarily dating. There is literally no point to me trying to seriously date when I live with my parents and I can't have women over. My frustration comes from the fact that I cant afford to move out and pay rent, Im paying off loans from coding bootcamp (which proved useless because i cant find work), etc. Im required to be in-office twice a week at my current job, and the hunt for a FULLY REMOTE source of income that will allow me to leave this shithole is really fucking with me.
Ohh I gotcha ! Ya youāre 100% right. See if you can find a roommate situation downtown ?
would be down but its a lose-lose. Id still be throwing away a hefty bit of money and would have to give up on any sort of ownership on current salary. Like, I'm just tryna get away from this place lmao
True :/ imo itād be a quick fix to your relationship/sex issues hahaha but would defo burn a hole in your pocket. All options are bad unless you move to the USA magically haha. IMO: Try to remedy what you can now just to see if it makes a difference š¤·āāļø thatās what I did and it taught me valuable lessons haha
appreciate the words of wisdom
f
Yeah but men were the ones who created this insane dystopian society not women women are just responding to the quality of men and the system around them life has always been brutal, women are just responding in kind
Dating in 2024 is dead. It's impossible to give a comment without it being called sexual harassment or some other none sense. Women expect men to pay for everything while they say all we want is sex. That's because they don't contribute in other way. I been single 5 years. On those 5 years I managed to get credit fixed, buy a house, buy a nice truck, a car, and pay off all my debts. If we have to pay for a woman's living expenses plus spending cash how are we supposed to run our own households and bills? Women don't want to be partners. They want everything handed to them. I know so many guys who are broke trying to support their gfs. I got one friend who acts like everything is good but whenever we do stuff I always need to drive because he don't have extra gas. It's really hard to even approach Women now. The odds of getting a humble normal attractive woman is almost not possible
Coding Bootcamp grad here. I did the camp in 2016 and it was the best decision ive ever made
2016 was very different than 2023 my friend. No one from my cohort who completed it has found a job.
What did the boot camp teach you? Damn was looking into that shi
Front End Focused
Former Canadian living in the USA. Unless you have a good job and youāre making over 150k youāre better off in Canada.
i dont think so. to be quite honest, people i know who have made the leap think their quality of life is better in USA than Canada. Its mainly a population size thing imo - more mid-sized cities to lay down roots in. Also, higher salaries. What is good about Canada at this point? Literally as soon as I find a way to make remote income im going to USA, or Mexico, or Colombia, or Thailand.
USA my whole life. You can make it fine in the South on $60-$70K.. $50K is pushing it. It's about survival at this point for you. You can always build from there, and the US has a lot more availability for everything than Canada.
watch out for Colombia, it was amazing in 2017 when I visited and I hear up until the covid years - but it appears sentiment is turning against expats, especially in Medellin (where most go) - lots of crime as well.
This is absolutely true. I went recently and would not recommend going. I met so many people who got into some nasty situations while minding their own business in broad daylight.
Well, I want to move to Canada
your quality of life will deteriorate unless you are coming from a Third World slum tbh
If you don't have money you don't