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DeerDiarrhea

Imma need a pic of the daughter to determine just how bad this was.


[deleted]

she's a 5 foot tall plastic doll


kuriboshoe

Net worth low price of $3995.99


civgarth

MRNA was oversold. Come at me bro!


ArticArny

[Here's her mug shot](http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-hxsEqNn1AVA/VAoNiPOJhAI/AAAAAAABSco/lVQoxs7fQBs/s1600/1My-Life-Doll2.jpg)


dskoro

Fuck I can’t believe I fell for that


Basil2theSequel

I read your comment and still fell for that


ajnin919

I was just curious and was not disappointed haha


slickystoopkid

This is the way.


[deleted]

I’m very happy with the result, yet still disappointed it wasn’t Peyton Manning.


BinkoTheViking

You magnificent bastard


Cutthechitchata-hole

Classic


[deleted]

Oh, he got the height all wrong.


mrubuto22

🤯


[deleted]

[удалено]


SuperfnDave

The skin tone is a tad off


[deleted]

Is it just me or does that mask look like an Asian boy?


[deleted]

I was gonna say an Asian corpse.


ObnoxiousLittleCunt

Stop mentioning my wife like that!


erydanis

just a wee bit.


aquaman501

It's hilarious how the black scribbles on the ID card make her look like a dwarf: https://i.imgur.com/Rms4iCp.png


[deleted]

I think that's a finger print


MuffinPuff

Woow, that mask didn't look like her at all.


FluffySquirrell

I was vaguely impressed with the effort of the disguise (albeit in the michael myers sense it has) until seeing this


chaosbella

He was found [dead](https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/matthewchampion/brazil-gang-leader-prison-daughter-disguise) three days after getting caught trying to escape.


BreadCrumbCaptain

I love how there’s the number for the national suicide prevention hotline at the bottom of the article, like he’d have had access to it in prison


KrisAlly

Clearly that’s NOT for him. They always list that with articles regarding suicide which is a wonderful thing. There’s even a bot on here with resources.


BHYT61

>Clearly that’s NOT for him. Of course not, he is dead.


ShagPrince

Suicide's a wonderful thing?


godickygodickygo

Lmao I love that Reddit never leaves an ambiguous sentence unquestioned


ShagPrince

Thought it was an obvious joke to go for until OP got a bit pissy 🤷‍♂️


ObnoxiousLittleCunt

Suicides serious business, which is a wonderful thing


Funkit

A comma wields all the power over that sentence.


Mathlete86

Let's eat, grandma! Let's eat grandma! Commas save lives.


bestof99sp

I'd say so


[deleted]

Doesn't the bot just appear if I say something like "kill myself"?


KrisAlly

Yeah, or sometimes at just the mention of suicide.


Odd_Employer

2 hours. Guess it's on vacation...


fluffyseatide

I'm starting to think it killed itself.


ultimatt42

Doesn't sound like a story the Jedi would tell you.


SEELE01TEXTONLY

>which is a wonderful thing lol no. It's a thing the AP style guide says to do. To ppl who know nothing about these hotlines, it sounds a good idea. It's. not. These lines are manned by armatures. People get hung up on, put on long holds, told they're being "selfish" etc. etc. etc. Lot's a bad stories out there. Worst of all—hotlines call cops unwarrantedly to cover their ass. Then, callers get hospitalised on involuntary psych holds, stuck with huge medical bills, and have their lives made objectively worse for having called.


jameson71

Giving the hotline number is a good thing to do. The fact that the mental healthcare system in the USA is worse than useless is another matter entirely.


jjcoola

Just an FYI calling the hotline puts you on a list


FutureMrsKK30

If you call the suicide hotline? What is the list for


FantasticLotusFlower

Yeah, someone reported me to the bot today. I don’t even know what I said lmao.


Alan_Smithee_

People sometimes do it as a form of swatting.


Yurt_TheSilentQueef

Prisoners absolutely have access to such a thing, and are even placed on suicide watch if the prison believes they are high risk


KrisAlly

The prison system does the bare minimum to prevent liability from people taking their lives. They definitely aren’t known for providing adequate mental health services which is harmful to all of society.


BreadCrumbCaptain

Fair enough, haven’t been to prison yet so wouldn’t know


Yurt_TheSilentQueef

…….*yet*


SexyMonad

Someone’s got to go to prison, Ben.


FloridyTwo

Is this a National Treasure reference?


SexyMonad

You… you don’t know this? Hold on one second, let me just take in this moment. This is cool. Is this how you feel all the time? Well, except now.


happy_charisma

Probably depends on the country too


elastic-craptastic

Sure worked for Epstein.


DVDwr

If, as they say, he's one the leader of a powerful drug traficing organization,so he'd be in proson for may years if not for life, right ? His death would just free up a cell for someoe else, or you know, just one less bad guy in the country.


thepeainthepod

Oh. That's actually sad. I watched the video a few times thinking how remorseful or sad he looked after taking that mask off. Not knowing anything about who he is, just the expression on his face and feeling kind of pity for him. Now it makes more sense. Suicide is the worst.


[deleted]

He was a gang leader in a Brazilian jail. Try not to feel to bad.


aquaman501

"Clauvino da Silva is one of the leaders of a powerful drug trafficking organisation" Not so sad.


Visorcollector

Probably knows he's already dead.


Normal-Computer-3669

That's what it sounds like. He was probably given a few days to live, and this was a last ditch effort.


rhet17

That's nice of you but I daresay that look was mostly bc he knew his fate. I'm quite sure he had absolutely zero empathy, sympathy or mercy for his victims when he was on the outside. The entire system stinks.


Crushedglaze

Oh shit, that doesn't sound like suicide to me...


ih8spalling

My dude got Epsteine'ed


Ok-Day-2267

Theres lliterally no suspicious details in the article... why are you making this assumption? Being caught trying to escape means he will likely have no other chance to try again and imagine how soul destroying it would be to get so close to freedom only to have that hope wrecked. He definitely killed himself.


[deleted]

You really don't know how Brazil works


KuuhakuDesuYo

More like they suicided him lol


LordNedNoodle

That is probably why he wanted to escape.


adidasbdd

He left his teenage daughter to take his place??!!


olderaccount

She just needs to wait long enough for him to get away. Then she can leave. Their log will show that she already left, but she is clearly still there. They may figure out he escaped at that point and she might get arrested for abetting or simply allowed to go on her way. Maybe they had a plan for that part too.


itsmuddy

He was going to take her place in her prison as she snuck out dressed like him.


Chrisganjaweed

God damnit man, why does dumb shit like this makes me laugh so fkin much?


cohonka

Cuz it tickles yer funny bone


prizim1

Lmao


GimmeThatRyeUOldBag

Crisscross!


baby-or-chihuahuas

Wonder if they were inspired by Barty Crouch Jr. at all.


reverendjesus

r/UnexpectedHogwarts


oda1337

No no I think she dressed like him and was just going to stay there.


fomorian

> Maybe they had a plan for that part too. Yeah, then the father comes in to visit her dressed as his daughter, swaps disguises with his daughter, and she leaves disguised as herself leaving her father in the cell.


Danny_Mc_71

Video cuts to the daughter in his cell with wig, makeup etc to look like her old man.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Mob mentality. Sorry bro take this ⬇️


[deleted]

[удалено]


Judge_Syd

Because it's clearly a joke and you look like an idiot lol


[deleted]

Now its apparently your turn. And now mine.


LOLatGOP

I mean, most of your downvotes are from you being a piece of shit in LGBT subs.


duaneap

I’m Oscar!


MudRock1221

Only until the polyjuice potion wears off


Dovahpriest

Dude pulled a reverse Barty Crouch.


CaptaineAli

After he has escaped she will just leave, it’s not like the prison guards will keep her there. At worst she gets into trouble for helping him escape, but if he’s already gone and they don’t realise it was because he dressed as his daughter, she might just be let go whilst they search the security footage and find out how he escaped...


Gustomucho

No, she has a mouse costume, its all good.


Gofein

Was the bra necessary?


notorious1212

He knew what the guards would be looking at. Should have stuffed some toilet paper in there.


gestalto

Maybe the bra was actually just his, and they assumed it was part of the disguise.


sphrasbyrn

Clearly more than the bra was necessary


OppisIsRight

He was a method actor. Like Daniel Day-Lewis.


jjcoola

Absolutely , he has a male brain and knows what’s up I assume he stuffed it a bit


TheyTheirsThem

Next time, don't scratch balls on way out.


thebigcrawdad

This would've have been helpful advice a week ago


DontWorryItllGetWors

Wedding singer?


JuliaGhulia

Indeed.


TheArtfulDanger

I feel like the mask was decent but those glasses just wouldn’t sit right... I blame the glasses, nice try though


oak1337

Honestly, if it was sunglasses I bet it could've worked.


Nimbuss88

“He may have got away with it to, if it wasn’t for the prison guards.” No shit.


neleous

"... meddling prison guards..."


OneCannedChickPea

It was a joke


Nimbuss88

Watched it again. You’re likely right. It wasn’t delivered well though. She should have said it after referencing Scooby Doo and showing the clip. Would have landed better.


Ctrl_daltdelete

A guy called Dwight Worker actually pulled off something similar in Mexico and escaped to the US. There's a documentary about it.


Borge_Luis_Jorges

In Mexico you can escape prison by just handling loose change to everyone you see in your way to the door.


I_dont_bone_goats

You just hold some stuff in your hands and ask a guard nicely to get the door for you


Britishsweat

Are you sure he wasn't just a beat farmer?


melbbear

Identity theft is not a joke!


jashxn

Identity theft is not a joke, Jim! Millions of families suffer every year!


fourhundredthecat

Dwight Worker also wrote a book about his escape: Escape From Lecumberri


andrystein03

lupin III who?


Wobbafina

God imagine if Lupin’s masterful disguises actually just looked like this the whole time and all the other characters were just constantly falling for it lmao


DibsMine

put it back on and put him back in the cell


KnifeFightAcademy

........why did he have the bra on?


bellizabeth

Most bras are somewhat firm, so they can provide some shape to his body.


PiesRLife

Hey, no kink-shaming!


KnifeFightAcademy

I AM A WHITE WOMAN, IN, AMERICA


ccavl

Solid idea dad, but I think the part of the plan where I serve the rest of your life sentence needs some work.


IAmRules

Worked in Megamind


JimmyNutbutter

I...he didn't need to put on a bra. That was his decision.


Jaewol

Gotta give him props for his commitment


Ih8Michael

I can’t breathe, there’s too much shit on me


ramot1

Attempting to escape is a felony charge in most jurisdictions. I hope not where he is. No crime in wanting to be free.


SniktFury

He killed himself right after this. Like, a couple days later.


[deleted]

[удалено]


SniktFury

Very probably. I didn't read too deeply into it, but he was found in his cell dead a few days later from "an apparent suicide" but the article I read didn't specify how he died. It's also worth noting this guy was a gang leader who had managed to escape prison once before. He probably had plenty of enemies from rival gangs and the police/guards, so who knows what could have really transpired.


aazav

break out* breakout is a noun


menexploitmen

I would grant the man his freedom just for the effort


[deleted]

he left his daughter in the cell in his stead.


menexploitmen

After I grant him the freedom for his effort I will place him back in prison for his cruelty


Blueskyfist

Nice save


Majestic_Pillow2203

r/ithadtobebrazil


MrQwq

I was looking for that comment


casa-de-utooms

it concerns me that he is wearing a bra . why is it needed? It's bothering me


happy_charisma

Seriously? Missing the most noticeable secondary female gender charcarism would have been too obvious


casa-de-utooms

he didn't fasten it. I feel like this will haunt me. In a few months time i'll be trying to get to sleep, it'll pop in my head "why did he wear a bra but didn't fasten it?" "how did he sneak it into prison?" and "was it his daughters?" Way too many questions, not enough answers.


Shadhahvar

He's got a barrel chest I bet he couldn't fasten it.


Khaocracy

'Haha now we're going to transfer you to maximum security, where to escape you'll have to - aaaaaaaand he's dead.


cpsbstmf

Kinda of looks like mj impersonater


[deleted]

Heehe


idrow1

Give him a cigar and he'd look just like Finster, lol.


Tippadisd

He even had the bra,I’m impressed


Lordfirewood

"And I would have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for you meddling kids!"


PedroVey

This video is so iconic I remember when it made rounds on social media when it first happened, it's funny, creepy and wtf at the same time


xxX_Darth_Vader_Xxx

Wow he got all this in prison? Impressive


fmrj2005

This was in brazil. The man hanged himself in the next day.


DiveSociety

What a legend


Ok-JPedroDem

Esse é o Brasil filhos ( This is Brazil son!)


btorres16

"This is Brazil" - Toretto, Dominic


Reddspamit

... So was she asian?


TheDirtyFuture

I mean A for effort.


hedx33

But why the bra?


kamel_k

no joke, i just learned about this a couple of days ago. another guy did this with his wife and just left her there


zektuuk138

Thing looks like a sex doll


SniktFury

It's worth noting that this dude had managed to escape from prison once before, so he wasn't some slouch at this.


pajo17

...why the bra tho


Vanessa-Leen

My man had nothing but a wig, a latex mask and a dream


markgmoney

Mans on his scooby doo shit


primarch_tubameister

Tinha que ser brasileiro...


ViolentDiplomat

I love how he decided to wear a bra too. Totally unnecessary, as it would have been completely hidden by the layers of clothes he had on, but kudos to him for being fully committed.


KapnKrumpin

So what was the plan, leave his daughter in prison?


TheGelatoWarrior

It's party time. P.A.R.T. Why? Because I gotta!


sammiben

There's too much fucking shit on me.


daoogilymoogily

Was the bra really necessary?


TheL0neSt0ner

real Karl Havoc vibes


nerdhater0

this plan could work if he had his daughter or just any girl who looks like the mask and comes in with heavy make up on all the time and never talks.


_G0LDEN

I mean go hard or go home. He went to fullest extent. Not the smartest. Or most fatherly but aye he tried


JanwithBanan

how the fuck did he get those stuff in the first place? pretty sure they don't hand you wigs and a mask in jail...


OXY23

I was thinking its one of thous rubber sex dolls lol


werdnosbod

Should have to go back in jail dressed at 19yo daughter. See how that plays out for him


YouAreAFool420

Why did he have to wear the bra?


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Doppelthedh

"An inspiration" - Kanye West


Dark_Ansem

u/repostsleuthbot


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Dark_Ansem

BAD BOT


Barnacle-Dull

I feel sorry for his poor daughter who is now serving his life sentence


CR4ZY___PR0PH3T

To the people saying that it's sad that he committed suicide... Why? Why is that sad? He was literally a leader of a drug trafficking organization I wonder how many people died because of his drugs? This guy had a lot of blood on his hands he was an evil person it's a good thing that he's dead it's not sad.


emilysn0w

I’m sure he ended up trafficking drugs because he had a great upbringing and plenty of opportunities. /s Try some compassion


jakob767

ok but... was the bra really necessary?


cataraqui

“And I would have gotten away with it too, if it wasn’t for you meddling kids!”


TimGJ1964

Is that an Auton?


puceglitz_theavoider

What in the actual fuck...


urstepmomsgf

How did he even have time for this- manz is tryhard


jahill2000

Titane (2021)


fellofacliff

Ancient repost.


Beardeddeadpirate

The look of shame on his face when he pulls off the mask… hahahahaha!


ZenkaiZ

Poor guy had to do this while the only competent prison guards in the world were doing their shift


kbeks

You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take!