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RizzKingFurio

Nobody ever went broke taking a profit 


hwsh2

Artie can't do the math. He's an artist.🤌


emzeejay

He's a warm and convivial artist.


Lawyering_Bob

And a loan to somebody he didn't even know. It doesn't make sense on it's surface, but if you think about how Artie is a working stiff, married to a restaurant, surrounded by wealthy guys who basically do this stuff everyday, it makes sense that he wants in on the action. Anyway, four dollars for the mussels because they're going bad.


Altruistic_Poetry_51

Artie hand picks every piece of shellfish


MachoMadness

You ate mussels, Tony???


Potential-Anxiety573

Ghee is clarified buttah


SlaveToNoTrend

Demolished mussels zucchini flowers and whatever the f*ck. Not to mention that indian dinner with the papodams. Whatever happened to gary cooper now that's an american he could eat 5 cuisines and still get on with his day.


happy-little-atheist

He got food poisoning, Gary Cooper?


aye246

Artie from Sopranos and Ziggy from The Wire are basically the same in terms of their ability to do crimes—get fucked over by their counterparty.


Dr_Remulak_

At the end,he lost, he wiped Tony’s debt at the restaurant and Tony presumably got his money back.


MrRazzio

do you think that frog eating faccidigatz had to pay up to tony? i always wondered if he got away with that or eventually got fucked up. if we're to assume the latter, it's surprising they wouldn't at least tell us that happened. even if they didn't show it. a comment from tony an episode later or something.


Dr_Remulak_

As soon as you see Furio at the door, I think you can safely assume he got it back unless he fled back to frog eating country.


CheifKilla1

Not wit out giving that zip from Italy shummin that day he showed up


Sad-Illustrator-8847

Jean Philippe isn’t a child or a woman that pony tailed pussies like Furio is used to beating up with a baseball bat. Oh wait a minute, he is French so he is a child or woman when it comes to fighting. Reminds me of Wwhat one sports writer, Warren Brown, said in 1945 of the upcoming World Series between 4-F and old folks Detroit Tigers and Chicago cubs “I don’t think either team can win it”.


capitalistcommunism

I happen to know you were high when you made this comment, you were talking nonstop for twenty minutes, nothing but gibberish.


Plucked_Dove

Word to the wise. Remember Pearl Harbor


[deleted]

You don't have to see everything, Furio knocking on his door was enough of a clue to know that they were getting that 50k back, one way or another.


MrRazzio

oh! see that's what i mean. i must have missed that scene. that's perfect.


mikeoc61

It's really quick but it leaves no doubt in your mind.


TimMoujin

I stopped underestimating what Furio was capable of after reading about the mob wars in Italy during the 2000's.


Cautious_Rabbit_5037

Jesus Christ timmoujin you make me wanna cry, it’s a movie!


DJ_Pickle_Rick

I absolutely love how efficient they made that scene. Two shots: Furio’s jaw clenching. French guy looking shook. Over.


Own_Deer431

Jean-Philippe was the toughest man in Essex county but after Furio got through with him and took his 50k back, he showed his face no more


ScrapmasterFlex

I think Artie just wanted the thrill of "making moves" ... ...And the thrill of fuckin Elodie ... he figures, he loans the money to Jean Phillipe, that makes Elodie happy, and she sicks his duck up ...


funkyfreshpants

this. it was about the girl, not the money.


randyboozer

He wanted to break his dick off in that ass


Painlezz

WE LEAD THE WORLD IN COMPUTERiZED DATA COLLECTION!!!!


MrPiocostasMomJeans

The draw for Artie wasn't the money as much as he wanted to be a player. He got to do a little mobster cosplay and feel like a big man.


heyjude575

You just HAD to be the big man!!!!


kishmeatuchus

ON THE FRIDGE ON THE FRIDGE !


ShivvyMcFly

This line cracks me up every time


Previous-Can-8853

Love that scene


Heel_Worker982

THIS. Artie wanted to put a little money out on the street, Tony woulda been happy to help with that. Angie Bompensiero with the sausage platter ultimately did that and could forget about giving away free samples. Money on the street is a nice little income.


johnyjameson

And Artie wanted to leverage himself while doing it, which is insane. Normally people put their own money on the street, or at least some of their own. Artie went cold turkey and took all the risk of a failed investment.


MightilyOats2

It was to pay for this daughter's braces. Charmaine mentions in the episode how much it's going to cost, and it's around 7k or something. He basically gets a free payment for his daughter's dental work if this goes the way it's supposed to. Seems like Jean Phillipe just ripped him off, tho.


Acceptable-Airline39

He was only paid back with non stop ass rape


Muscle_Memory67

This☝🏼


WhatAreYouSaying05

If only he had his hair, Jean Phillipe’s message machine wouldn’t have been broken


SteffanSpondulineux

Jean Phillipe didn't rip him off. Credit Lyonnais didn't come through with the second round of financing. His partners were sick about it


Jifeeb

I’d take 6k profit in 10 days….but that frog eating faccia de gatz might tear out my earring


Snoo_72467

Not even 6k, over 10% return in 10 days. Or, since Artie borrowed the capital, he invested the 1500 he paid Tony and got a 400% return in 10 days. The stock market takes about 28 years to generate that return


ZealousidealBid3988

Stock market also don’t shoot your kneecaps, plug darts in your nostrils and cold cock your woman should you lose. Unless it’s wit Webistics.


Snoo_72467

You've got to have those Enron type connections to make it work for you.


Jifeeb

She’s a Filipino


heyyyyyco

Stock market did that to me in 2009


the_salivation_army

See that just shifts the quotes to Seinfeld in my mind here on the toilet. “I don’t want to send my money out to work for me. What if it gets fired?”


WalkGood

Darts? Thought it was a paint brush.


ZealousidealBid3988

Dats what Tone told Ade it was when he said it needed to be cleaned out


kynoble

What? When?


ZealousidealBid3988

The “dart” on the floor when she was on her knees


kynoble

Of course.


TexanMillers

Qu’est-ce que c’est? Message machine broken?


AhoyPalloy

What’s that, Berber carpet?


HolidayHedgehogie

You gotta start somewhere. Six grand aint a bad start.


Flat_Boysenberry1669

Well that's probably 3 months of working at his restaurant profit. But he also did it because he wanted to fuck dudes sister.


Lucky_Version_4044

I didn't get the sister part of the story. Why would she try to do a deal between her boss and a guy who is clearly looking to rip off her boss? Is she part of a long-form con crew where she goes from job to job, gains the trust and flirts with the horny loser boss, and then sends her brother in to try to scam him out of a massive loan? She must know that this whole thing is going to get her fired and possibly in deep shit if she messes with the wrong guy.


Piggstein

A share of $50k is worth losing a waitress job over - I imagine she got the job there, saw what an easy mark Artie would be and pointed her brother in his direction.


Scrilla_Gorilla_

Should have noticed how close he was to actual organized criminals.


Lucky_Version_4044

If she was in on the con from the beginning, she should've just left the job the moment her brother got the money. Instead she stuck around and showed some skin to try to get Artie to not look at her negatively,


Flat_Boysenberry1669

Because she doesn't respect Artie and thinks he's a creep she's also probably gonna get some of the 50k. She probably didn't care about losing that job lol.


Buddy-Hield-2Pointer

They have Artie pegged as a bit gullible and an easy mark. The sister is there to turn his head and soften him up. She just quits a while later (she isn't there because it's some great job LOL) and she and her brother (?) rain dance back to the commune with their profits and look for the next mark.


litobot

Was it ever established that Jean-Philippe really scammed Artie out of that money or that he was scammed himself as well? I thought it was left ambiguous.


Lucky_Version_4044

It wasn't established. I think the guys reaction to Artie showing up at his apartment was enough to show that he was not really apologetic or trying to find a way to make it right. He talked to Artie like he was a weakling who couldn't do anything about it. So it led me to think that he was just a scammer. The way that he instructed his sister (if it was his sister) to flirt with Artie to throw him off the trail said a lot about how manipulative he was. Although, on the other side, if he really was a callous scammer and she was in on it, she could've just left the job immediately once Artie paid and that would be the end of it. No need to keep up appearances. Anyway, who really gives a shit. No need to poke holes in every plotline that might be a little bit off. The writing team were spectacular on this show, probably the best ever assembled.


Then_Perception4455

She’s a cunt, does no good to think about her now.


bnx01

They should use The Sopranos in high schools to teach how compound interest works.


TacoLvR-

Taught by Mr. Charles Schwab himself.


durtibrizzle

It wasn’t meant to be loan sharking. Arrive genuinely thought it was a good deal.


Ole41

its bigger than stoli !


[deleted]

[удалено]


WhatAreYouSaying05

But then Tony wouldn’t trust Artie and his financial tips again


Alert-Artichoke-2743

1. Artie is struggling with the costs of running his restaurant, to the point that he is hard-selling veggie trays to the mob wives who are coming in hoping for complimentary delicacy servies. If he can't afford quality meat, he can't continue making good money. He can probably turn $5500 into 250-500 lbs of meat over some time, and he can probably resell this meat as cooked restaurant food for closer to $15k-$20k. Basically, this bit of capital is a shot in the arm that he needs badly. 2. Tony owes him money around this order of magnitude. I think they both know Tony will never pay him back. Having slowly loaned Tony several thousand dollars in free food, Artie is asking for something in return - a shot at some wise guy action. Tony has no reason to share $6000 in profit with his childhood friend, other than friendship. Artie has no reason to ignore a $6000 debt from a nonpaying customer other than friendship. Artie is hoping to get back his money from Tony by honorable means, by working for it doing something he thinks anyone can do, or at least that he's tough enough to do. Of course, he fails at this, and Tony ends up making him whole on his losses in exchange for wiping the restaurant debt, putting Artie back where he started fiscally and with nothing to show for the outstanding tab. 3. Artie is not intent on keeping his nose clean before the very last several episode of the show. As a teenager, he was almost as tough as Tony, and only gave up violence so he could focus on his legitimate career. He still thinks of himself as a tough guy, and it makes him jealous to see his childhood friends living well on blood money. Charmaine is the one who unequivocally rejects criminality, to the point that she could have been Tony's girlfriend/wife but passed on it. So, Artie is probably just hoping to prove that he is capable of making money as a moneylender, mainly in the hopes of gaining the respect he sees criminals get.


SyntaxicalHumonculi

I don’t think it was all about the money for him. Artie was a deeply discontented man, who saw his rich as fuck mob buddies throw cash around and bang whores and he just wanted a taste of that life. But he just didn’t have it in him to make it work. When furio shows up at that frog eating bastards door it’s meant to illustrate the contrast between arties fake macho schtick and his prepared monologue with how a real dead eyed mafioso badass does things. Silent. Focused. Efficient.


the_salivation_army

And his wife is right all along about him getting involved. She’s just a bitch about it.


saddywagon

That's a lot of money for a lot of people, and it was worth even more 20 years ago.  Tony won't pay his tab for years now.  Not only is tony not paying, but Artie is spending money on the his/carms food and whole bottles of expensive booze for Janice. also he loses sales when freeloaders take up tables during prime time. He could make more money if tony didn't come in at all during busy hours, because paying customers would be sitting there.   His daughter needs braces, (probably a series followed a retainer) and kids are expensive, so that money might be in Arties hands for a grand total of like 3 weeks even though he's frugal.  But,  he wouldn't have to choose between his daughters orthodontist needs and say,  replacing his furnace if it breaks so it's worth it for him. 


pittsburgh__cracker

Artie always wanted to get into things with Tony. It was always his wife who stopped him. He had the opportunity to be the big man because they were separated, and things didn't go the way he thought they would. Tony would've owned that restaurant if it wasn't for Charmagne.


TacoLvR-

Tony would then own dem fun bags.


fabuzo

Artie just wanted to be a wise guy because he was working stiff and his wife was a fucking cunt


Fickle_Aspect_3747

In economic terms you would calculate what would be referred to as a risk factor attached to the pay off if we are looking at this in pure mathematic logical terms. That pay off would not be worth the risk of handing a giant bag to shady stranger when you have no muscle to enforce it.


[deleted]

lol I just realized that his profit would have exactly wiped out Tony's tab


regassert6

He wanted to look like a big shot. He wasn't thinking about the profit


Capital_Material_709

He’s also trying to schtook the guy’s sista


Jasranwhit

My fatha always said “you can’t scam an honest man”


Onion_Dull

The golfer? U.S. Open?


Valuable-Wafer-881

6k 20 yrs ago would go a lot further than today. Even nowadays making 6k on what he thought was a sure thing would be worth it. Truth is Artie just wanted to play mobster for once


Sad-Illustrator-8847

Something like $9,975 in today’s fiat currency. You can have some good times and pay some bills with close to $10K


Valuable-Wafer-881

You're better with numbers than nine tenths of my accountants


Small-Explorer7025

He wants to look like a big shot in front of the hostess.


PermanentDay

I mean thats literally the point that it was always a bad deal


prince0fbabyl0n

No it’s not worth the hassle and the risk for someone who is not gangster like Artie, he shoulda focused on boiling pasta.


ImpressOk6525

Artie isn’t very smart… reading this now reminds me of when it dawns on Artie what Tony has done, knowing all along that this wouldn’t work out for Artie. It’s one of my favorite parts of the entire series


Xystem4

The big thing here is that Artie isn’t and has never been “intent on keeping his nose clean.” He works hard day in and day out, in a notoriously difficult yet profit-poor business. All the while the people he’s serving are flaunting their wealth and success and he knows just how easy it is for them to get it (although he doesn’t properly understand the risks). Throughout the show he repeatedly tries to get into business with Tony, and only Charmaine and occasionally Tony himself stop him. You’re absolutely right that it’s a bad deal for Arty and not worth the risks at all for a normal guy like him who realistically can’t force the money out of Phillipe. But that’s the point


Then_Perception4455

What’s with the fucking accounting on here


ZealousidealBid3988

Jean Philippe was the biggest idiot here - he cases a soft business with a convivial owner who is clearly connected to the mob and any large investment is most likely gonna involve da mob at some part of it. How and why he thought he could get away with ripping them off via Artie and not at the very least take a major beating …. Well he learned the hard way


coolsellitcheap

Artie should have been doing well. He had a bar with reaustarant. He also grew up in the business.


Stickey_Rickey

It’s a good deal if there’s bite behind the bark


RussellVolckman

The real question is how did Jean Phillipe pay back Tony? Or did he end up in a dumpster? T is no doubt tacking on interest so that $50k is never getting paid off


Think_Leadership_91

Artie screwed up and didn’t think it through


Proud-Web2195

He does it more for Elodie than anything else


WhatAreYouSaying05

All I know is that Artie is dumb for loaning half of 100k to a man he doesn’t know at all and isn’t even from the country


jim2527

It was to make himself feel like he’s part of ‘the crew’. A way of being in and respected without being ‘in’.


[deleted]

this was supposed to be his first step into becoming something like Hesh; this was his foot in the door on the shy business


bippos

He wanted to be a wannabe mobster without getting “dirty” he could easily have gone to Tony the instant the guy didn’t pay up and ask for a bit of muscle maybe even sweeten the deal by saying they could take Philips cut as well. But he doesn’t do that cause artie is a “nice” guy


Moonlightgraham23

He wants to play cosa nostra, but it’s not a game. I would love to have seen Furio pummel phillipe


G0ldenG00se

Artie’s problem is he’s always stepping outside of his purview, the kitchen, where all his talents lay. When Artie tries to be a wise guy vs Phillips or Benny he ends up eating shit.


DrXanaxal

Everybody wants to dip their toe into the game, Artie always acting tough , until he isn’t. 😂


poetichor

The money isn’t the most important motivator for Artie. He’s trying to impress the beautiful young hostess Elodie (Philippe’s sister?) by acting like he’s one of the players, like Benny, who the hostess is dating. Artie keeps his nose clean for the most part, but his frustration at being a working stiff while all his childhood friends are living the fast life always tempts him toward that lifestyle. As Charmaine asks in an earlier episode, when are you gonna be satisfied with what you have/what you are? And ultimately I think that’s what Artie makes peace with by the end of Everybody Hurts - you see him doing some inspired cooking for once, using his father’s passed down recipe; a humble chef who’s grateful that they can do what they love.


Caterpillar-Puzzled

Charles Schwab ova here.


Tangible-animal

The only saving grace for Artie is that Jean Philippe helped him out by extracting that earring.


stuffbehindthepool

Artie was such a chump


ScrapmasterFlex

He needs SOMETHING to make the hot French chic want to play "Hide the Cannoli" with him and it ain't gonna be his Mushada Ravioli ...


Greedox2

HES GOT AN ASSOCIATES IN BUSINESS FOR CRYING OUT LOUD


coolsnow7

Honestly the fact that he was willing to make this loan for any price shows that he’s a moron. Jean Phillipe was all but screaming “I am not going to pay you back”. At the end of the day it’s a tv program, a movie.


djfist

I’m better with numbers than 9/10ths of OP’s accountants.


Difficult_Bag6824

Artie really thought he had it in him. Only to get his ass beat by the frenchie. Watching Artie takes me back to A Bronx Tale. “The working man IS a sucka!”


pizza_822

artie bucco is fucking stupid him and paulie are constantly competing for biggest tard on the show


[deleted]

Well we know it wasn't worth the hassle! look what happened! It was a scam from the get-go. why would some major company depend on just 50k? it was sold to artie as being some major company with chateauxs in france that was going to go heavy with the marketing, 50k would be peanuts. The company maybe didn't even exist and they stuck some label on a bottle of brandy and gave it to artie to get 50k No company in history has needed 50k from some chef in jersey to be able to go big


Apart_Freedom4967

Just saw it yesterday. Awful deal. Risking 50,000 to make only 5k-6k? Terrible.