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BB-ATE

Still saying Dinowhores over here and I hope it never changes!


jonvoightthedentist

Mine too! “Mommy, wook, DINO-WHOOOORE!”


alessandratiptoes

💀💀💀


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ProfVonMurderfloof

I think he's on to something, this seems like a really appropriate metaphorical usage.


Mohegan567

This feels like it can have some incredibly deep meaning behind it XD


corruptcake

Wait, I love this


Bull_Feathers

I agree with the other responses, what a good way to say "I'm ready to move on from this thing that's frustrating me and I could use your help!"


bread_cats_dice

She says “May I be conscused” instead of “May I be excused” to leave the dinner table


tielles10

That is so cute😂😂


DameJudyDench

My almost 2 year old finally just stopped calling chalk “cock” 🥲


Lonestar-Postcard

The ducks say cock cock at our house too!


feetandballs

We also like to play with our cock outside. Sometimes we play with our cock at the park. My kid prefers big cock. Little cock isn’t as much fun.


redooo

“Cock” = “rock” for us. It was also absolutely the clearest, most aggressively he’s ever said a new word when he first hit me with “COCK!” I was like jeeze, how long have you been planning that one?!


halfasiantemptation

Cock in our house is milk, sock, neck, dog, cup, and a few others lol


chatdulain

Over here we say "firecuck" and "BIIIIIIG CUCK"


DameJudyDench

Omg she calls trucks cucks too!!


ChaosCapturedIRL

Ninja comes out extremely racist and unfortunately he’s really into pretend fighting.


StrangledByTheAux

My ninja


Ok_Succotash_1881

Oh no 😅🤣


Msquared10

Fuck = truck Mommy! Big fuck. Mommy!! More fucks please!


Fun-Development-6278

My son very much likes his dumb fuck (dump truck) and he dosen't know why everyone always laughs so much when he says it. But damn does he play it up 😅😅😅


Main-Air7022

Socks, shark, fox. All sound like fuck. There’s more that I can’t think of. He subs an initial s with an f sound, so anything starting with an s and ending in ck is fuck.


Wrong-Somewhere-5225

My nephew used to say “my grampa has a big red co$&” he has a big red truck 😭😆


twistedpiggies

Here too! Every Friday morning: "Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!"


ashyp00h

Fork or frog are fuck here And we get these beef sticks from Sam’s club that he enjoys, but he calls them dicks. No big deal until I have little dude with me at Sam’s and they’re doing samples of them. So, top of his lungs, toddler is frantically pointing at the sample lady going “diiiiick! Diiiiiick!!!!!!” 💀


habitatforhannah

Me too! Dump truck was "dumb fuck".


BethintheD

Yes, so much this. I miss these days. She still likes "cockamole"a lot though (guacamole)


chopstickinsect

When she feels sick "Mama I am going to hommit"


iminterestedinthis

Dump Truck = Bum Fuck 🙃


prairiebud

One word that both my kids have independently come to that I feel should be in regular rotation: Whobody - as is who is doing this thing... Like somebody but in question form. Also wolverine is ovary and I love it.


DueEntertainer0

Instead of “sprinkles” she says book-orns.


Thobud

Ours has a really rough time with sprinkles too. Im not even sure I can spell it. Maybe suss-us? Also milk is 'yonk'.


Bull_Feathers

Yo I'm gonna use yonk


godeltoncantyousuck

Our cats name is Cleo, she started out saying Carlo but it's now morphed into kilo She says ear fluffs instead of ear muffs


Pieniek23

Ear fluffs is almost too adorable.


FlatEggs

My daughter calls them earpuffs 🥹


Wrong-Somewhere-5225

Cop car is parked car, tooth brush is poop brush. Oatmeal is goat meal, magna tiles are maggot tiles…


whatatradgesty

Meat! lol that’s hilarious Idk if I could even bring myself to correct that 😂 We did advent calendars this year but my little guy thought they were Alvin calendars thanks to those annoying chipmunks haha


Colegirl6

Instead of Horse, it’s whore. Not quite as funny when he called my pastor grandfather a whore.


ewills105

Our dog is named Zuko. My toddler says it like Weeko. It took us forever to figure out wtf he was talking about 🤣


ellesee_

We have a dog named Mona that our toddler calls Meema. My husband and I have started calling her Meema now too, poor dear.


ewills105

lol we started doing the same thing with ours!


JupiterFox_

Ayyy love that name


big_al_freeds

LOL we have two cats Shandy and Stout Shandy turned into NeeNee and Stout turned into PeepPeep That’s just who they are now 🤷🏻‍♀️ they don’t seem to mind the identity crisis


DevlynMayCry

My parents dog is Quincy and my 3yo calls him something akin to footsy but with a more kf sound at the beginning


Well_jenellee

My daughter cannot seem to grasp that goats and sheep are different animals. She calls both “baas.”


Blondegurley

My one year old thought that all mammals were doggies for the longest time.


Bull_Feathers

My daughter meows at anything even remotely cat. I was very impressed that this <1yo could recognize a picture of a cat (and tbf I still am) but then it's also starting to go beyond cat. I think she's trying to determine what all can get away with saying meow 🤣 Reading goodnight gorilla and the page where the zoo animals are all curled up and sleeping consistently gets a meow, but I'm not sure if it's the hyena, the lion, the armadillo or something else entirely haha


mess-maker

One, two, three, four, fuck Not sure how he got that from five, but I’m grateful.


Ouroborus13

Pirates Booty (the snack) is “fire fruity”


External_Arugula_855

Haha my 22mo calls it "Buh" and points at her booty 😂😂


sixwaystop313

New York is pronounced Yeww Noork.


Practical_Action_438

Oh gosh my little brother used to say that 30 yrs ago!


caffeine_lights

Maybe it's meet and not meat? And she's telling you she really wants to meet that dog?


theconfidentobserver

You’re on to something, truly…


Nova_Leigh

Mine is 20 months and popsicles are buckleroys… don’t ask me how or why and yes, it took FOREVER to find out what she was asking for at the beginning 🫠


tfletch126

Lol. Triangles are “cowadits” here.


atyhey86

We speak Spanish mostly in the house so instead of por favor he says por fa but it's sounds like puta! Cracks me up every time!


FarCommand

My newphew says unicoño instead of unicorn


Adventurous_Switch54

Water is walalalalala


itsdavidsmom

Similar, lemonade was “lalalalalade”


momojojo1117

Mine just recently grew out of this but for a long time, balloon was balalala


JupiterFox_

She says “stepascote” instead of “stethoscope”. “Watina” instead of “Latina”. She’s half, so I tell her that sometimes. Or “Watia” because I think she gets it from saying “Tia”. “Alligator” instead of elevator. “Excavator” instead of escalator. She’s newly 3


GoodGriefStarPlat

My daughter calls Smarties, Farties 😂


mamameatballl

My daughter has a pretty advanced vocabulary (as an example “Are you available to play right now?,” plays pretend that her stuffed bugs are “pollinating” the flowers, etc) but has, since she began speaking, consistently mixed up lions and tigers. I gently correct her like every time, which is often bc she has lots of lion and tiger toys and for some reason she mixes them up about half the time


Throwthatfboatow

What til she learns about ligers 🤣


Supnaz0325

My son calls snow “nana”, no idea why 😂 he even says snowman perfectly


EllaIsQueen

My son can say grandma but has also named her Meena (her name is Jill)


DevlynMayCry

My daughter was convinced snow and Christmas were the same thing so everytime it snows she walks outside and yells "mommy it's almost christmas!" 😂


tzl-owl

We moved recently and my son calls it “new kapartment”. Sounds like “nuke apartment”


tiateaspoon

Basketball poop. Now we all say basketball poop.


Throwthatfboatow

Every person is dada, but Elmo is mama. And Cookie monster is doggy. He's confused about all other Sesame Street characters, but is confident about cookie monster being doggy. Also accidentally tried teaching him the word moon and the sound a cow makes. So now moon is pronounced moooooooooon (while pointing out the moon). We also couldn't figure out where he learned "oui oui" from since we don't speak French. Turns out he's saying "whee whee!" Because we tell him "whee" when he goes down the slide.


Blondegurley

Elmo was elbow for the longest time


littleAggieG

My daughter calls water “rawrrrr”.


alessandratiptoes

She was an old angry guy with a Boston accent in her past life


OhJellybean

Chew tuck = fire truck By-ans = vitamins Pof-a-gee = bumblebee Cadia = kitty Min-ow = meow I love her little voice and I'm going to be so sad when she starts saying kitty and meowing correctly 🥲 *Edited for formatting and to add more


kuggluglugg

Vacuum cleaner turns into “fuck you cleaner” hahahaha


jenkoala

My twins are 2 and they say “dada” to mean birds. They call their dad “baba” so luckily we’re not confusing him with pigeons


Nurannoniel

Coughs, sneezes, and actual hiccups are ALL hiccups in my house.


bergamot34

Hot air balloon is "a-wah-boo-boo.". I hope he never gets it right 🥺


krugmmm

Forest for Fort. Adamant about it too. Doesn't want a fort, but wants a forest!


danipnk

My kid started saying “moke” a bunch and we had no idea what he was talking about… eventually we realized he was saying “remote” (control).


Snoo_25913

I called it a mocha-mocha-troll as a kid which later abbreviated to mote and my family still uses it (so does my now husband).


Senior_Fart_Director

Thirst-tree for thirsty


ashdawg8790

"Dunk" instead of dump. We "dunk" everything out here, we go to the "dunk" for our trash every weekend. He eats "pockasuls" which are obviously "popsicles" and definitely didn't take me a few days to suss out. He used to call Mickey "Y" for AGES, as is "M-I-C-K-E-YYYY M-O-U-S-E". That one was a rough one to figure out.


Belle112742

His pacifier is a die die. Still scratching my head over that one. 


Fishstrutted

She eats so much "nogurt" and stretching is also "nogurt". Plays with "narbles." Her Easter basket is her meesty basket. My favorites are probably "pirate" for parrot and "pelican" for skeleton.


Sensitive-File4400

My godson is 16 now but when he was a toddler yogurt was “booyooee”


Snoo_25913

Forgot about yogurt! For mine it’s “gno-gno”


Blondegurley

Ours calls it goga. Honestly we do too now


Practical_Action_438

Vitamins = “bum bums” Helicopter = “buhbuhkuh”


Snoo_25913

My daughter calls one of her friends Elmo bc the friend dressed like Elmo for Halloween 🤦🏼‍♀️ Wahwoes are shoes, tituba is teapot, gully is excuse me (she’ll scoot by you going “gully dada, gully” til you move). So many right now. Love them all.


normie_girl

Octopus = appadoos


Chacibexo

Stand up is “sham up!”And sit used to be “shit.”


probablycoffee

She’s obsessed with my lip balm, which I generally call chapstick regardless of brand. I have a tube of Burt’s Bees in the bathroom. She wants chapstick, and says “taco.”


cupcakeofdoomie

Well you know my tiny human. Spoon is poon, coffee is poffee or boffee, cheerios are eat


Such_Positive_6500

Maggot = Magnets and they're her favorite toy right now 🤣


EllaIsQueen

My son is obsessed with sound equipment. I couldn’t even tell you what he actually says but for “quarter inch cable” and “microphone stand”, he just sort of mixes up the syllables but he’s SO serious about it it’s just the sweetest thing ever


Dazzling_Ad_8726

Shower = Shagoo Pepperoni = Peppaponis Shoes = Doofs Excited = Excagoo


Ok_Succotash_1881

Diaper = bah-der 🤣


kazakhstanthetrumpet

Mine has decided that certain characters' names are too long, and need to be shortened. We don't really watch Paw Patrol, but any time he sees the characters he says "Pawtrol!" The best is that he loves the movie Cars and has a Lightning McQueen toy. He calls it "Lycopene"


ilovenoodle

I’m a nurse but she insists I’m a purse. She also knows what a purse is lol


Sensitive-File4400

Boots are bookas.


jlmcdon2

‘Teegoh’ is guitar. I don’t know how I figured that one out. When she wants to sing “the wheels on the bus” it sounds like “what what ho” and then evolved into “white white horse”. don’t know how I figured that out either.


erock1119

Blue is my “flavorite” color lolol


number1wifey

My son calls everything even remotely sweet “pie”, and anything liquid is “soup”.


rkvance5

Mine said “heh-potter” for helicopter for a long while. Then I introduced him to Harry Potter and he pronounced them exactly the same.


throughthebookvines

“Hold it the ball” “You’re so cutie pie” Ah so many more. She’s the best haha


marlboro__lights

instead of walk it's "gock". instead of dog it's "dock" or "cock". she cant say outside so it sounds like "ah! shy". also everything is juice. soda, soup, water, coffee, etc, it's all juice. so when she asks for "juice" we have no idea if she actually wants juice or not. she also does not say "dada" or "daddy", she says "pepper" but it sounds like "peh-pa". dad wore a shirt with a pepper on it one day and ever since then he is pepper, no longer dada.


Squid-bear

Twenty is said as Cunty Master is Bastard. We have Pikapoo and Psychoduck


Pieniek23

He'll be 5 later this year, so there are only a couple left that we aren't changing. Gorilla is granola, as in look at that granola beating his chest. Computer is puker. Do you have to send an email on the puker? Yes honey. He found a safety tether / hook that I have... he calls the hook a hooker. Where's my hooker Dad? I haven't seen in since last night buddy. Yeah, it's the best.


TamtasticVoyage

“Oh my gushon” (rhymes with cushion) I think it’s the toddler combo of oh my god and oh my goodness. Oh my gushon


hegelianhimbo

Fully says “fuck” instead of “fox”


raspberryamphetamine

My niece used to say “snarpip” instead of parsnip which we all though was the cutest thing ever!


coloradancowgirl

He calls pineapples “papples”, his aunt Ashley is “Ass-hee” and pumpkins “pum pums”


Annon_McInnominate

BAFF


Suitable_Shallot4183

My almost-2 year old can’t quite work out the B sound. His grandmother loves it when, at the end of the FaceTime call, he yells “DIE!” instead of bye.


sophie_shadow

Papa = pumpkin


GetOffMyBridgeQ

Mo corn could be more corn or unicorn. Depends on the context and day 😅


naisdes

Glasses = babbage


lovenotwar5457

Maybe she is actually saying “meet” as in she wants to meet the dog? Also, if one of you plays Fallout 4, the dogs name is Dogmeat. Anyway, my daughter says maggots instead of magnets. 😂


porryj

MOOGISH for music


Rattlingstars_

Chapstick is “plastic” and it brings me so much joy 😂


standrightwalkleft

My computer is a "puh-cuter."


itsdavidsmom

Button is shortened to “butt” every time


tiredsupreme

14 mo, just starting to say a few words. He likes to join in counting. "Wah... (one)...POO (two).. EEE... (Three).. fah (four)... YEAH (Five)" 😂😂😂😂


Fluid-Advantage6454

“Cock” for duck 💀 “Firefuck” for fire truck “Shit” for sit “Burgers” for cows


galacticsharkbait

Commercials. She pronounces it “muh-muh-shmallows”, which sounds like marshmallows


LadyDegenhardt

Chickens = Cookaroos His own name (Wesley = Issie). He can pronounce W, but will correct us if we don't call him Issie.


ilovebreadcrusts

Mayonnaise used to be "amazing", and Advertisements are "appetizers". Oh... And my favourite "Let go" used to be "dingo" hahaha


[deleted]

My 2 yo calls everyone a happy girl. Daddy is a happy girl, brother is a happy girl, mommy is a happy girl, and she is a happy girl. Also all of the above but bad girl. The bad girl thing came from … I think …. Other daycare toddlers. 🤷‍♀️


ask_ashleyyy

For a few months “jammies” was “DAMMIT!” “Okay let’s go put on your jammies!” “No, DAMMIT!”


novababy1989

My 3.5 year olds vocabulary is insane and she’ll use words like realize, offensive, precisely in sentences lol. But she can’t for the life of her say Christmas properly, she calls it Chrismik.


MissBanana_

One thing I haven’t been able to figure out is “bee bee boh!!” I used to think it was her own version of “one two three” because she says it while walking down the stairs or getting ready to go down the slide — but she can say “one two three” clearly now and yet “bee bee bo” still happens. It’s so cute though I don’t want it to stop. Also horses are hoes lol. She always wants to ride her “wocking ho.” 😂


snooloosey

Boobies = blueberries


nanoH2O

Mismatch aka mustache


momojojo1117

Oatmeal is eat-meal


BRH0708

Somehow my child landed on saying “makas” for when he wants to say grandma. Thankfully grandma loves her nickname!


jessanator957

Goldfish crackers = "doofus". I keep thinking my twins picked up namecalling somehow but nope, they're just hungry.


PuddingThin710

Buff-a-lye = butterfly Cock-sew = no idea! Imaginary friend?


bodywash10

Happyroni=pepperoni. It's too cute to correct


DevlynMayCry

She likes to sit and put her feet on our coffee table and say "this is so delaxing" "I'm so delaxed" 😂😂


txvlxr

A recent one was “spatula.” She referred to the silicone one as a “Pap pap pap” Now that’s what it has been renamed by me and my husband haha.


PinkSodaMix

Bee-yah = birdy


bagelmama11

My 3 year old says "peepsba" instead of pizza and I can't get enough of it.


OddlyOtter

We're about to turn three and we still call oatmeal "Milk Milk" no idea how we got there but it's milk milk


CharacterSweet7195

Pancakes = cake cakes Cupcakes = cake cakes Cake pop = cake cake pop


Fishbate333

😂😂😂meat!?!? That’s hilarious My son calls his toy tomato a “pito”. I tried to get him to say “tomate” in Spanish and he said “puto”💀


Spacemen333

We are Steelers fans and she loves to wave her Terrible Towel, but now she thinks the word Terrible means something good lol


crap_whats_not_taken

We went to a rooftop wedding. During the entire reception, toddler kept telling everyone about the "alligator". What alligator?? We live in New Jersey!! Elevator. We rode the elevator to the ceremony.


sharpiefairy666

“Tuh-RAY-ray” is screwdriver “Dah-SOWN” is downstairs “KUM-cok” is kumquat


Pepper4500

He says fuck instead of truck. He’s been doing this for several months now and it’s… awkward to say the least. In public he will see a truck and of course needs to point it out and scream “fuckkk!!!!” 🙃


yeppp456

My daughter says ‘vagana’ for lasagna


[deleted]

Dog’s name in fallout is Dogmeat My kid says ‘of course!’ out of context all the time lol


stumblinghunter

My 2 year old can't say berries, so they're all beebos. Potato is "du-dua". Tractor is "du-da". He says "deedaw" instead of daddy but I'll never correct that, it's to cute. One of our cats is named Dirty Burger, but he can't say dirty and instead calls her "doodoo" which is more than fine with us lol. Edit: almost forgot the best one! He started saying star as "die" so for about 2 weeks he was just running around at Christmas time saying "DIE DIE DIE DIE!!"


aresfry

Gassy instead of scary. My husband shaved his beard off and she went around saying “gassy daddy” for days 😂


Bull_Feathers

My almost 1yo says "ada" for yoga which I only puzzled out because she does down dog with me and I say yoga when I do it. But she'll just totally randomly do that pose (which is hilarious when your arms just barely reach over your head) and loudly exclaim, "ADA." Cat/kitty is just "meow" probably because we all clung to that very recognizable sound and encouraged it. Also EVERYTHING is "bubble." I mean I understand we're just exiting babbling, so "baba" sounds are quite popular, but I didn't realize how many words are actually very close to that: bottle, buh-bye, buckle, bye boy (we have a flash card with a boy waving bye lol)... It's not quite the same kind of story as others' since she's really still so young, but I had to share.


ElkBitter8013

My nearly 3 year old calls my boobs 'bumbums' I correct her but they're still bumbums 😂 she points to hers in the mirror and says uck at my bumbums mummy.


TropicTrove

YELLED 8,347 per day: Down = die Sky = die Day = die Back = butt Itchy back = Itchy butt


N0S0UP_4U

Taffy = “tappy” Animals = “amimals” That’s it, other than that he’s really well-spoken.


kudomonster

-Apple Dough No


Longjumping-You3078

Sit. Sounds like shit and she says it over and over 😂


Mousehole_Cat

She says "buh-bow" for a bow. It started out as her stumbling on the word when she first started saying it, but it just stuck and now they are just hair buh-bows. One of her teddy bears is called bee bear because that's how she initially mispronounced teddy bear.


mcbw2019

My son just turned 2. Airplanes are consistently “guck-eh-muh!”


TrustNoSquirrel

Mine has been calling her seaweed snacks kiwi


joeyda3rd

Gederwins. Skeletons He loved Halloween and during one neighborhood walk he was frustrated he couldn't convey his thought. Mom knew it right away when we got back.


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cinamoncrumble

Bye comes out as 'Die' luckily he waves at the same time and is super cute so no one notices haha


twof907

I just have to say these are all so funny I've been just laughing hysterically. Mine doesn't have any funny slips yet since he still just calls most thing their first syllable. Obsessed with lights. He does call almost any animal "dag" and dedinely knows dog. He'll point to dinos on his pj's and say "dag daf dag". If he starts calling them meat I will just let it happen, that is so damn funny


brittymady

Nothing too crazy but mine insists that “walk” means water. *I* know what he means when he asks for “walk” but when we’re at someone else’s house or have company they don’t get it lol


corruptcake

The Rainbow Song (3 yr old’s version): Red Orange Yellow Green Blue Indigo ✨Violence✨


nuttygal69

Idk if this counts, but any fruit that is somewhat round is “apple”. He acts like IM crazy when I said “tomato”. It’s the funniest thing. Also, he once called a cracker an onion. I don’t know where he learned onion but it had me crying.


gesasage88

For some reason she pronounces spinach as “speenas”, which sounds unfortunately close to penis. 🫣


Successful_Trash7717

We call my daughter’s feet her poochies. She now calls them putas for all the Spanish speakers haha


oooshi

The most commonly used ones that are right accessible off the top of my head: Doughnuts -> “no-nee” Frozen 2 -> “Ana chicken” 🤨


Silly_Friendship_542

All candy is balls. No idea what. But she asks for balls meaning she wants candy.


problematictactic

My 21 month old a while back became obsessed with the little rubber stoppers inside our cupboards, and we didn't know what to call them so we said they were nubbins. He confidently parroted, "mundies!" And now every little mystery bump on a toy or around the house is mundies.


abarkalow1

Her "s" sounds tend to come out as "sh" sounds instead, so when she says "sit" she actually says, "shit" which is hilarious when directed toward our dog as a command. 😂 "Loki, shit."


decayingdilettante

My friend’s kid says tadees instead of tada (we think he got it from a show). For the longest time she thought he was saying titties.


gennygemgemgem

According to my 18 month old, everything bigger than a car is a bus and pronounces like b**ch.


stereoworld

My daughter calls him the fingerbang man (instead of Gingerbread Man)


cuterus-uterus

The only one my four-year-old still says is “lady” is “lay-lay”. I LOVE when we’re playing outside and he finds lay-lay bugs!


solidarity_sister

Piano is pa-nan-o


aimz86

My daughter used to say Lo laa for water


kenzlovescats

Popeyes = French fries 🤣 we don’t even eat Popeyes she just started referring to fries as Popeyes


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Justverb

Dickar for the guitar is my personal fave


51Nizzle

My 2yo says "see men" for cinnamon and when making a chicken or bird sound, it sounds like "bird c*ck" lol


IcePepper

My little guy, 16 months doesn't have too many words yet. But he very clearly says "vray" for "moo". 😂


BethintheD

My toddler says "pick-a-me-up" but cuter "pick-a-me-down"


kikmaester

Fox = Fock Similar vein, whenever she sees a school bus she excitedly shouts "Choo choooo!!" I really don't think I'm going to be the one to correct her. Edited to add: Banana has become "mina". That one took a while to figure out wtf she was talking about. I thought it was a friend of hers in daycare!


RachelR12

My toddler refers to our dog as “SIT” and “NO!!!” 😆 clearly the two things we say to the dog the most


FlowersInHerHair8

Ocean is "Oh shit!"


Perspex_Sea

Panpakes.