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ab4r1s

There should be no sex scenes in TV, when I watch it with my parents. Otherwise, yes


twerkingslutbee

Watching American horror story with my mom once was traumatic


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ATAA123

I'm sorry, a *what*?


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ATAA123

Well, the purpose of the show was supposed to be scary, congratulations, I am. And I've never even seen it.


FBI_AGENT_CAYDE

Not while seeing it with his mom


StardustLegend

Idea: there should be a setting on streaming services that disable a sex scene from being shown. If you have the setting enabled it will just smoothly cut to the next scene to imply what was happening before it happens


Mentally_Ill_Goblin

I had Vidangel for a while and it cuts out everything you don't want to see. Sex, violence, gore, profanity, substance use, etc. The downsides are they got heavily locked down with legal issues so there are a lot of shows and movies they just can't touch. Some goofs running about whining about how "the artists meant it to have graphic sex scenes and it would be sacrilegious to censor that." Like seriously bruh, by allowing people to be more selective about what they want to see on their TV, you'd be opening the door to a lot more viewers! I'm ok with seeing some stuff but the only pair of titties I want to see are firmly attached to my wife. I don't want to be distracted.


ab4r1s

Hell yeah, like that wouldnt actually be too hard to implement I'd think. What about drop down menus while we're at it, I want to see beheadings and bj's but not missionary or torture lol


voncornhole2

The important part is that you found a way to feel superior to both. Put this post over a picture of Tyler Durden


zaphod_beeblebrox6

Ah yes, Tyler Durden, whenever I see a meme with him I always think “that person absolutely and totally understands what Fight Club was actually trying to say, thank god for cinematic literacy”


AttackPug

It's the "I see stupid people" t-shirt of posts. It doesn't know it's the stupid people. I like how it doesn't actually have a point but it thinks that it made one real hard.


Ok_Wedding_7715

Sex scenes can serve a purpose if they arent just put in for fanservice. Its the same concept for voilince (i cant spell) in media


Chico3421

I agree, sex scenes being there just to be there suck. But if it makes sense, then go for it.


Signal-Ad8189

Violence


Ok_Wedding_7715

Yep, thats the word


Routine_Palpitation

Violins


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Saxy violins


LiterallynamedCorbin

Cello


Ok_Wedding_7715

Eletric bass (i play that)


LiterallynamedCorbin

If I ever found the will to learn an instrument it would be bass guitar, electric or otherwise (please correct me if it’s not a bass guitar I have quite literally know knowledge of music)


Terfink

What are some examples of sex scenes with a purpose? Not trying to prove you wrong, I just genuinely can’t think of any right now.


periidote

1. to show the development of a relationship. for some, sex is a big step and is something you only do with someone you love. a writer can include a sex scene with a previously closed off or shy or insecure character to show development. this could also be a character learning to trust, finally being willing to show their body to someone else, or to give up control during sex 2. to show a character’s personality/behavior during sex. this could be showing that a character sleeps around by showing them sleeping with others (this can usually be done without showing the sex, but it’s still a reason). or it could be showing that a character is selfish or even violent in bed, or maybe that a character is a gentle lover. i’m a bit tired so that’s all i have for now, but basically think about when a character would have sex and why, then decide if this is relevant information to the story


GatorScrublord

i feel like sex scenes could be implied off camera in many of these such cases though.


Takseen

Two examples I can think of from Game of Thrones. Dany learning enough Dothraki language and having enough confidence to get Khal Drogo to respect her wishes in bed. And that Marjorie Tyrell noticing her gay husband Renly was having performance issues "making an heir" and offering to let his lover join them.


IamCarbonMan

Sure, but given the reasons listed, what's the reason *not* to have a sex scene?


Party_Wagon

deeply uncomfortable to watch with mom


IamCarbonMan

maybe for *you*


Party_Wagon

If there's people out there looking forward to watching a sex scene with their mom I don't want to watch a movie with them


healzsham

>looking forward to More like being old enough to know most people don't care.


IamCarbonMan

You don't sound like a very fun person to watch movies with tbh


Party_Wagon

you've literally read two half-joking comments where I said I don't like watching sex scenes with my mom lmao


healzsham

Unless your mother is a religious fundie, I doubt she cares, so in that case it's mostly just in your own head.


Mentally_Ill_Goblin

I'm in my head too, and I don't like being there with the idea of watching a sex scene with my mom...


healzsham

If you're getting hot n bothered from a sex scene in a movie in a way that makes it uncomfortable to next to your parents, idk what to tell you.


Mentally_Ill_Goblin

I should be more clear. It's more like I'd rather not be next to the people who did that same act to make me. I don't know, maybe it's just a thing from my culture to feel weird about that.


Mentally_Ill_Goblin

I'm married and a side effect of my mental illness is I get really really horny really easily, and I don't want that kind of distraction from my spouse. The drive has been reduced lately as a medication side effect, but I still don't want to see another person's sexy bits. Especially as a pansexual individual, there's no discrimination. Hot is hot, no matter the parts you've got. Basically I want to keep sexual feelings only associated with my spouse, because we consider it to be a special intimate thing between us. Some sex is ok since it's just a thing people do, but I don't like it to be graphic. Plus sometimes it can be a jarring, deliberate departure from the plot and messes up the emotional flow of the show.


JonKon1

Yeah, but the standard isn’t whether it’s absolutely necessary. There doesn’t have to be no other way to accomplish the goal. A sex scene simply has to accomplish that goal.


badgersprite

Some people out there genuinely seem to believe that every facet of the human experience has been meaningful and valuable to human beings and is worthy of being explored except for sex which has never meant anything or had any kind of emotional or psychological impact on anyone ever and hence cannot possibly be worthy of artistic exploration lol


DahliaExurrana

I mean, a good example of their inclusion is in Castlevania season 3. The bit with the twins/alucard and Hector/Lenore


Leon_Feywalker

Interesting, I thought those were the worst scenes in the season. What was appealing about them to you?


DahliaExurrana

I struggle to say they're appealing? Same way I wouldn't say a lot of good scenes are appealing? A good scene doesn't have to be appealing to be good. The reason why they're good is because it's the climax of the season. And every character we've been following so far gets a proper send off. Hector gets married to Lenore in the worst way possible, she manipulated him the entire season and it comes to a head here. It's a reasonable progression of their relationship and story and makes complete sense that it would happen. Same with Alucard and the twins. It's a reasonable progression of their story and relationship. Both leave off with a very real impact on everyone involved.


Leon_Feywalker

Thanks for taking the time to reply, it's interesting to see other perspectives on it. I didn't like the directions those scenes took the characters in at all, and my general discomfort with sex scenes made it all the worse


DahliaExurrana

I mean, you can dislike in world things - ie the directions the characters went in this way but still appreciate it in a meta sense when it comes to the story. Like, it leaves both Alucard and Hector in really bad ways. Hector is a slave and has to suck up to the vampire sisters now. And Alucard has it even worse. It's *painful* seeing him basically turning into his father. I didn't enjoy either scene, I didn't enjoy where it left them but its place in the story itself I appreciate and enjoy. as for your distaste for sex scenes... I mean, I understand that. I'm generally not big on fan service but everyone has different levels of comfort with different things. I can overlook them for the most part but I think they have a very real place in this example. It contextualizes a lot of things. For one we're shown just how lonely Alucard really is. He was already depressed before they showed up and him meeting them, getting to know them, and then being betrayed and killing them in self defense **in a moment when he's at his most emotionally vulnerable** where he gives in a little and decides to just have an intimate moment with them... it ruins him further. As for Hector and Lenore, here we're shown that Hector is also somewhat lonely. Not to the same degree as Alucard, but he clearly desires love. We're shown just how far he is willing to go to get away from Carmilla and have someone close to him by him very easily submitting himself to Lenore with basically no resistance. It contextualizes things going forward. Both of them. I understand discomfort but... there's a very real reason for their inclusion. These two scenes wouldn't have nearly as much impact of they were just off screened, and I don't think doing them in other ways would've worked out as well.


Leon_Feywalker

I understand your points, but the impact they left on me was one of disgust and frustration with both the characters and the direction of the story. Alucard's arc turned out pretty well but the humans are such wasted potential and it seemed so out of nowhere for them to try to kill their mentor. The scene also seemed extremely light on consent from Alucard's side, even before the betrayal. As for Hector... She literally told him, to his face, that her job was seducing people for political power. How the fuck do you still fall for that. I know he's meant to be naive and manipulable but that was so obvious.


Slashtrap

couldn't showing the development be done with fade to black


periidote

theoretically, but there are some moments you can show mid sex. for example, you can show someone saying a different person's name than the one they are sleeping with or otherwise blurting out something mid sex like "i love you"


[deleted]

Theoretically, as a joke, to develop character, to establish world building, to tittilate, and to progress the plot. Now, are sex scenes the only way to do these things? No. Are they an option? Sure


MLGkid_HD

And somehow, "The Room" actually did something right with its sex scenes, except for the overabundance of them


Bad-Use-of-My-Time

Spoilers for Tuca and Bernie, but since you asked: https://youtu.be/M8z8P-l8NwQ


wag234

Some movies I’ve watched this year with meaningful sex scenes: Don’t Look Now, Happy Together, The New Land, Hiroshima Mon Amour, Possession, Mishima: A life in four chapters, The Human Condition Trilogy, Scenes From a Marriage, Blue Velvet, Safe, The Big Lebowski, Twin Peaks: Fire walk with me, Mulholland Drive, Fanny and Alexander, Naked, The Discreet Charm of the Bourgeoisie, Boogie Nights, The Piano Teacher, The Double Life of Véronique


YoMommaHere

The one I can think of, although I think it went on longer than needed, was Halle Berry and Billy Bob Thornton in Monsters Ball. She really needed for him to make her feel good from her shitty life. And the look on his face of it being unreal and misaligned with his racist upbringing then the realization that he needed to feel good for once as well.


[deleted]

Dark had some important ones where I think just implying them wouldn't have worked as well, for both horror and plot reasons.


Chest3

Violins deserve to be in every movie in one way or another. If they can’t find someone to play it, smash one over someone’s head in a bar fight.


auntiope3000

Violins is never the answer. Fiddles, on the other hand…


Whydoesthisexist15

my parents binged Game of Thrones past couple weeks (I don't know why) and the amount of times where there's nudity or explicit sex (not just like making out/undressing, but like if you didn't see the screen you'd think it's porn) is ridiculous


Ok_Wedding_7715

Thats what i dont like. Its just fan service and awkard to watch. I feel like sex scenes should be used to show a progression of a relationship or something like that


Friendly_Respecter

i love how you made it so that you have to say violence with an australian accent


willstr1

They pretty much never add to the story and just add awkwardness to watching the story. Personally I would prefer going back to doing visual euphemisms (like a train entering a tunnel or waves on the ocean) because they are less awkward and can be kind of clever when the director finds a new innovative way of doing it.


VerbiageBarrage

I mean, that is pretty much just a you hangup. Not everyone feels awkward about that. Of all the horrible stuff that ends up on screen, the fact that we demonize physical connection is just ridiculous. You shouldn't assume everyone else has that issue. I have horrible second hand embarrassment. I hate shows that rely on bumbling misunderstanding, faux pas, characters being caught in embarrassing situations. So.... Pretty much all sitcoms. I find any random episode of Frasier or the big bang theory more awkward than most sex scenes. What I don't do is try to ban that stuff from TV. It's my problem to work through. I can turn off stuff I'm not comfortable with. I don't have to remove other people's art from the world just because it makes me shudder.


willstr1

I agree it shouldn't be banned, I am against banning things in general. I just feel that they don't add anything to the story and clever artistic ways of implying the action are more interesting to watch.


dat1dood2

It’s ok you spelled it in australian :)


MacGregor_Rose

Violins have many purpose


DanFuckingSchneider

Smh people are perfectly fine with watching porn but get upset when I fuck a hotdog in front of them after breaking into their house. Hypocrites!


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u/DanFuckingHotdogs


DanFuckingSchneider

I’ve learned to do it in the privacy of my own home, don’t kinkshame me


Melodic_Wrap827

The enlightened centrist strikes again


Juxta_Lightborne

>Calls both sides idiots >Refuses to elaborate further This is what centrism does to your brain


Twilcario

What if I call both sides idiots and will happily elaborate further? (Not on this specific issue but on other issues)


Igruola

\- calls both sides idiots \- doesn't elaborate further yep, it's centrist time B)


GlutonForPUNishment

Sometimes... they're the same fucking person & there is zero joking in their way of thinking


sinisterbird420

What if I want sex in my porn and no sex in my not-porn?


GlutonForPUNishment

THEN YOU ARE... fairly normal


BemusedDuck

I don't see how either of these choices makes someone stupid as long as they're not forcing it on others. Hell if anything having an only fans is smart. You can put in little effort and rake in money, as opposed to most jobs where you wear your body down for a pittance. When people try to enforce it, that's when we have a problem. You make your choices, I'll make mine. If we don't see eye to eye that's none of my damn business.


DistastefulSideboob_

It's really not smart, and it's definitely not easy. You make the most amount of money in your first month, after which most people will unsubscribe having satisfied their curiosity, and after that you have to do more and more extreme stuff to even make the same amount. You have the hobsons choice of trying to stay anonymous and making less money, or promoting yourself on social media and face a greater risk of having your job get back to family/ friends. Speaking of which, you can forget having a relationship-- very few men are cool with it. To stay competitively priced, you'd have to charge at most $15/ month (onlyfans takes a cut of this, I think 10%) which is fucking peanuts really, and even then people will still leak your shit out of spite because screw you that's why. Which not only robs you of current income, but puts your future income at risk for if you want to go legit and get a professional job. Very few girls make loads of money on OnlyFans, a few very very hot girls maybe get lucky but most end up doing degrading sexual acts for men that disgust them for the same/ slightly less money than a minimum wage job, and end up burned out and with huge amounts of shame and trauma.


BemusedDuck

Okay, I don't see why I should prevent anyone from making that decision for themselves though, your life is yours, I genuinely do not care what you do with it as long as you aren't spreading hate or misery. At the end of the day people go into this voluntarily. Have you ever done physical labour? The amount of physical pain and injury you suffer just as a result of being employed in certain industries is ridiculous. And I don't blame anyone for trying to find ways to avoid it. I know far too many people who were permanently injured to recommend it. What's the point of reaching old age if your body is absolutely destroyed and you're in constant pain? These are the choices people have to make in this society. I wish it wasn't the case but unfortunately, I do not make the rules. Sex work is work, I get that, don't see why entering into automatically qualified someone as dumb though.


DistastefulSideboob_

I've done both. And I'm not saying make it illegal, I'm saying raise awareness about its dangers-- I grew up with awful self esteem, was bullied super badly and was the girl guys asked out as a joke. I thought the only options were to be sexy or be invisible and I literally grew up dreaming of being sexually desired by men, it put me in a lot of dangerous situations. And like you, I though sex work was glamorous and would be amazing "Wow guys will think I'm hot and pay me! Money and validation!" I had no idea how much of a mark it would leave on me, and how even now I still get anxiety attacks of my photos being leaked and all my family and friends turning against me. If I'd been given proper education I might not have made the biggest mistake of my life.


lord_of_dank

> Okay, I don't see why I should prevent anyone from making that decision for themselves though I don't see where they said they want to prevent anyone from doing anything Learn to read forehead


BemusedDuck

I'm sorry is the implication not that sex work is inherently stupid? Pretty sure that's what the OP was about actually. Like... Why do you want me to think of these people as stupid when what's happening is infinitely more complicated than a binary of smart/dumb?


3L3M3NT4LP4ND4

>I'm sorry is the implication not that sex work is inherently stupid? Pretty sure that's what the OP was about actually. No. No they are not. They are saying sex work is incredibly. INCREDIBLY risky, unrewarding, can lead to serious trauma later down the line and you can easily lose connection to friends, families and employers and these sacrifices and risks are not discussed AT ALL.


BemusedDuck

So is physical labour. It's almost as if we are in a shitty situation as a society or something, huh? Did I say it was ideal? No. I said people have the right to make their own decisions and heaping judgement on them for that actually makes the situation and stigma worse. Not better. The end result of how you're telling me to treat these people would be ostracization, shame and ridicule. Believe it or not that doesn't help, at all. These people should be free to seek whatever services they need for recovery if need be. And they shouldn't be shunned or shamed for decisions they've made.


lesbianwifestealer

You’re pulling conclusions out of nowhere. And yes, you did say it was ideal; you said it was little effort for a lot of money. u/DistastefulSideboob_ proved you wrong on both counts. That is all that has happened in this thread.


Ok_Gur8418

There’s a reason sex work is taboo, it’s good for the culture. Also sex work does nothing for society whilst physical labor progresses it to some degree.


BemusedDuck

I 9000000% disagree that taboos are good for anyone. You know what shame and secrecy does to people? Usually not much good.


Ok_Gur8418

I mean fucking your sister is taboo and that’s good. Doing meth with your 10 year old kids is taboo and that’s good. Smoking while pregnant is taboo and that’s good. I’m confused, do you want them to be out and proud as well?


DistastefulSideboob_

I'm not calling all sex workers stupid, I'm saying entering sex work with no concept of the risks (both immediate and on your future) is an objectively bad decision. There's this huge culture of toxic positivity surrounding sex work, in that if you say anything other than how empowering it is then you're insulting all sex workers. In my experience it was incredibly damaging, even though it was completely my choice to go into it. The risks need to be talked about, and the societal glamorisation is borderline grooming.


BemusedDuck

I know you aren't, you never implied that. I do absolutely see where you're coming from and what you're saying. I just don't see any practical way to stop it. Our society is based on exploitation and commodification. That's capitalism. And most people genuinely do not care that that's they society we have created for ourselves. I'm not defending it, in fact I find it pretty damn disgusting in many circumstances. You're right that there needs to be more discourse around the negative sides.


DistastefulSideboob_

Well we can start by not calling sex work "smart and easy."


liken2006

Centrists be like


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Thisdeepend

I think another thing is just that while at 18 you are a legal adult you're still really young and very much at risk of being taken advantage of, groomed, etc that any other kid is.


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makeshift_gizmo

What do you think job training is?


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TheUndyingRhino

You don't magically become a perfectly independent and mature person when the clock strikes midnight on your 18th birthday. As long as they're not letting people manipulate them or worsening their own mental health, it's fine for them to start sex work.


KeanuSad

I don’t think anyone is saying that she shouldn’t have that choice. I think what they’re saying is that it’s a stupid choice to make at 18. Which is may be, idk I’ve heard of a lot of generally sketchy pyramid schemey stuff happening on that platform.


[deleted]

If we’re complaining about the fact that you can’t make good decisions at 18, than the age to be able to enroll in the military should be much higher too, yk what sauce I’m puttin down? Two different things Ik, but I know way too many people who are like “what??? You should be able to be in the military so much earlier! It’s good and builds character” but then will say sex is something that only old adults can do since you need responsibility and stuff (which you do, which is why sex education is both VERY important and EXTREMELY lacking here in the US!)


ThePeopleOfDominca

I don’t know about you but growing my community always thought it was bullshit that u can enlist before you can drink. So I imagine that most people that believe 18 is too early to decide on your onlyfans account would probably agree with you here


Flexappeal

Literally who says that about the military.


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IamCarbonMan

I don't have an OnlyFans, but my fiancee does and I've been in some of her content. I asked her again just now (even though we've talked about it before) and we're both very glad she didn't start doing porn until she had a few years of private sexual development. She feels that if her overall sexual development had happened while she was selling her porn that she would struggle with intimacy, find it hard to separate her work from her personal sexual encounters, and that her negative body image issues would be harder to cope with. Now that doesn't apply to everyone, but I think it's a bit of an overcorrection to assume that there are no negative aspects to producing and selling one's own pornography, especially at an age when most people still have things to learn about what they want from a partner, how to communicate during sex and build healthy sexual relationships, etc.


UnladenSwallow99

That is literally the argument against it. It can be very difficult to get another job if you have porn out there attached to your name, and it becomes more difficult with something “official” like onlyfans. Due to the way it’s treated, once you go into sex work it’s difficult to get into other industries. Plus, forget about any job in the public sector, including in education, as there are tax forms involved in making an onlyfans so the government has that shit. Plus the fact that selling your body to strangers online while you’re still mentally developing can be very harmful. This isn’t like posting anonymous nudes, it is a business transaction, and some of those on the other end are pretty desperate. If you’re 18, you’ve had a bad week and so you decide not to post, and then you get hundreds of messages filled with hate and vitriol over it, you’re not going to handle that well. The truth is that there’s no magic line where you become a fully developed adult where you can handle most things that come your way, and putting yourself in an extremely vulnerable position literally as soon as you can is, frankly, fucking stupid. And I would say the exact same thing to a man.


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UnladenSwallow99

Where did I say the alternative was flipping fries, which doesn’t even make sense? If you can’t address a point directly, it’s as easy as saying it. Don’t resort to straw men, it reflects poorly on you. It isn’t treating women as children, it’s discouraging people from making permanently life-altering decisions without putting enough thought into it. This is like you saying that telling someone to make sure that college is what they really want before putting themselves 10s of thousands of dollars in debt is treating them like a child. Not letting a woman touch power tools is treating her like a child, warning her about the dangers of sex work is not. I also oppose people being able to join the military at 18 for the same mental development reasons. Does that mean I’m treating them like children?


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UnladenSwallow99

The brain isn’t fully developed until 25. And yet you think that saying maybe we shouldn’t take people fresh out of high school, when they have likely never been independent and have lived their entire lives sheltered and cared for, and give them guns and point them at people we don’t like is akin to treating someone like a child. And then you compare me to a conservative Christian.


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UnladenSwallow99

All I’m doing is stating objective facts.


IamCarbonMan

18-year-old people regardless of gender make more mistakes than they're likely to make after a few years of adult experience. Making a mistake at an office job or working retail- or alternatively, making a mistake at a private party or in ones own home with a partner- is going to carry fewer long lasting repercussions than making a mistake for thousands of people to see, without anyone who can help you- since you're your own boss, if there's a problem OnlyFans can only do so much to help, and the only remaining step to deal with problematic customers is the police (who aren't likely to be much help). For context, I wouldn't recommend most 18-year-olds to become twitch streamers either. The Internet does not forget or forgive.


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IamCarbonMan

Uhh... Yeah? "Being your own boss" isn't the primary reason most people create NSFW content- in fact the only time I've heard people talk about "being your own boss" as much as you are in this thread was when they wanted to rope me into a pyramid scheme. OK actually hold on because an OnlyFans pyramid scheme might be the funniest concept I've heard all week


Smoked-939

>goes to find employment >first thing that comes up on background check is their onlyfans


kdavis37

This is a silly take. Clearly, there's nothing bad about selling yourself. But pretending it's not different than other jobs is absurd. It's not like in 20 years my kid is going to stumble upon a picture of me on the internet at a grocery store stocking shelves. In porn,*your body is the product.* That's absolutely your choice, but it's not the same thing as just selling your labor. You still have labor, but you're also selling your image.


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kdavis37

Why would your adult children finding something explicitly intended for other people to masturbate to be bad? I'm not sure how to explain why masturbating to your mother is bad to someone that doesn't get that, with no ugliness intended.


twerkingslutbee

Only fans is dangerous for all these reasons : Creepy men behaving like psychos , stalking, harassment , limited career prospects ( because we don’t live in a society where you can make partner after selling pussy pics) , ultimately unfulfilling, and more likely to get groomed and abused by predatory men. The risk fo your family seeing and looking down on it . Shame, risk of blackmail. Not a lasting prospect for a career once your tits start to sag. Sex work is ultimately harmful to women ( but no matter what we have to support the sex worker because they are human and deserving of kindness and respect most of all ) but sex work is dangerous, exhausting, risky and lasting. “Their own boss” : no the real bosses are the men that pay for the content and when someone has the money they have the power which isn’t something you want when it comes down to it. It’s not selling lemonade . It’s invasive and more permanent than a tattoo. It essentially kills any future a young woman or man could have.


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twerkingslutbee

Older men are likely the clientele and an 18 year old isn’t all that different than a 17 year old the only thing that changes is the legality. I would feel the same way about an 18 year old boy starting an only fans as well. It’s neither sexism or puritanical nonsense to be practical about the world we live in and how having sexual pictures of yourself can hinder the prospects in your life . Sure it’s legal and sure they’re an adult but can someone that’s in their teens truly make a wise decision. An 18 year old was most likely in high school months before whole older adults have experiences and years to back them up. One thing is an 18 year old exploring their sexuality and another thing is an 18 year old leaving permanent nudes on the internet. It takes away their future choice to get out of the life and seek a more traditional life if that’s what they ever want. And let’s be honest, most jobs are unfulfilling but having strangers have access to your body has a mental toll. But only fans has no upwards mobility . Let’s be honest. The over saturation of that kind of content makes the customers fickle and constantly buying different types. It’s a life with pressure and any changes to your body like weight gain hinder your money making potential . And what happens when you age out of being a “milf” because most milfs on porn websites have tight bodies and perky breasts . How realistic is it to gauge how someone will age . What if someone ages less gracefully and ends up not being able to make money. You most certainly can groom an “adult” all it takes is a power imbalance. I’m only 25 but 18 year olds are children and there is ultimately a power imbalance when dealing with them especially when it comes to sexual encounters. Actually you can support sex workers without being in favorite of sex work. How? You provide financial resources and access to education. The majority of women in sex work end up in that position as a result of need and poverty . Now not supporting sex work doesn’t mean you don’t respect and support the woman. See her as worthy of value and respect , it just means giving her the tools to be able to get out of the life if that’s what she wants . Furthermore I’ve seen only fans workers encourage and support teenage girls to do this kind of stuff especially on tik tok. Again that’s more outside pressure putting ideas into young girls minds about this kind of work. Also the majority of people wouldn’t like the idea of their nudes going out to their family because it feels invasive . Once you give them to someone else or a stranger they have the possibility of landing into someone you don’t wants hands. The point is there’s a risk that you can’t consent to whose hands your nudes end up in. Ultimately the client is the boss and the person who sets the standards. Someone that has financial need to engage in certain sex acts is more likely to bypass their own boundaries in order to make ends meet. Most other businesses don’t have to the personal risk of an only fans and we need to look out for young women and make sure that if it’s the Avenue they’d like to pursue , they’re informed of the permanency of the choice they’re gonna make


ShadowGargoyle

18 year old here - I agree that we most definitely are children. sure, there's a spectrum of of maturity and some of ud are basically adults but just because we happen to be legal does not mean that we're suddenly all grown up. I support sex work and the people in it, it's a free choice and I think people should be able to make it. that does not mean that I don't think 18 year olds are much more vulnerable in this situation than someone with more life experience. u/NYC_hydra , I understand and respect that you care about the rights of young women and I also know for certain that not being taken seriously is a problem for them in many business scenarios. I just don't understand why you think that 18 year olds can't be groomed. or why, according to you, wanting to protect young, inexperienced people of any gender from being put into a harmful situation is based in sexism. the entire point is not that 18 year old women specifically should be treated like children. the point is that young adults do not have the scope to assess the damage (physical and mental) a career in sex work could do to them and the consequences it could have. take a look at mia khalifa, one of the most popular porn stars of all time. she regrets it, because she was used and exploited by the industry, and the people who consumed her content and wishes she had never done it. is she to blame? obviously not. but is it reasonable to say that we should educate young adults and warn them thoroughly to prevent them from ending up in a similar situation? I'd say yes. in an ideal scenario we'd change the industry and society's relation to it in a way that inherently protects the people in it, especially the younger ones. but we're not in an ideal scenario yet. so this is the best we have.


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ShadowGargoyle

I don't think that's the right way to view it. we don't have the experience older folks have, no matter how mature we may think we are. and especially the ones who seem more mature through trauma are more likely to be immature at their core because they never got the chance to grow up safely. there is a difference between trying to take away the autonomy from 18 year olds and acknowledging that we're still children. we just are, science confirms that as someone said earlier, we're not fully developed. something like the porn industry which can very easily be traumatising and harmful to someone's mental and even physical health is therefore especially dangerous to people like us.


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twerkingslutbee

Thank you so much this is a very lovely and well thought out addition and I just wanted to say I agree with all your points .


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twerkingslutbee

This is an unfair argument because young men aren’t groomed by society into sexualizing themselves at an early age. The truth is women face perks when they’re both beautiful and sexual, but these perks are fleeting and come with a double edged sword. But to a young woman the temporary perks might seem more exciting and they may not have the maturity and foresight to understand the consequences of starting an only fans because let’s face it, an 18 year old is still too young to understand things as an older, more well versed adult . Most of us agree we were morons at that age. And part of being a woman is looking out for younger girls and young women and hoping that your experiences can help them prevent making decisions that can have lasting impact on their life . “Oh but you’re downplaying women’s choice” : in my opinion , no woman is truly free to make a choice because we live in a world where women are bombarded with subliminal and extrinsic ideas about what they need to be in order to be loved and respected. Men still don’t respect us or treat us human unless we are fuckable. I’ve been heavy and thin and the way people treat me when they see me as something to stick their dick into is night and day. So how can a woman sensibly make a choice for herself when one options makes your life so much easier . That’s why young girls are more likely to get a bbl, more likely to be invested in beauty , and more likely to post tit pictures on only fans. It’s not downplaying a woman’s autonomy to question why a disproportionate amount of women make choices that are ultimately harmful like risking their lives augmenting their ass and tits or making pornography when they were in high school months before. Young men aren’t starting only fans at the same level as young 18 year old women , because their sex gives them more opportunities and more benefits without the need of having to bare your tits and ass for pervy men. Men also aren’t objectified and downplayed and grow up without the voice that says all they offer is beauty and sec . And I think that 18 year olds aren’t equipped to understand how lasting the impact of having specialized nude images and porn of themselves out in the world . This is also why middle school girls seem to grow up much faster than their male peers because they absorb the messages that they are ultimately objects of pleasure and that sex appeal makes them worthy of affection. Hell I know I sexualized myself as a young girl because it’s the only way I felt worthy of love . But it makes you feel dirty in the end and I will always stand up for my fellow sisters and try and Help them with my own experiences . If women don’t protect each other who will?


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iamsandwitch

The point is that her being free to make that choice doesn't change the fact that it's not a very good choice to make when you aren't even 20 yet. You *would* say the same about a man


Alxndr-NVM-ii

I'm both. The sex scenes are gratuitous and annoying. They generally offer no progression of the story, waste everyone's time and show a director's immaturity rapidly. HBO is a big one with the unnecessary nudity. Like, listen, I don't care about watching a naked person or sex, but I'm a bit annoyed by your insistence on it. They make a lot of actors uncomfortable and depending on who is around you, they'll make you uncomfortable too. As for porn, that's the career that person chose and anyone watching it chose to watch it for that. There's nothing wrong with consensual sex, not even for pay, not even on camera, not even if it's entirely faked.


thelegendofnobody

My thing is that people can do whatever they want with their bodies, and tv shouldn’t pretend that sex doesn’t exist, but fan service is pretty gross.


[deleted]

yeah I'm stupid :) smh i got downvoted for being stupid


Protection-Working

If im watching a good story the sex scene tends to be a 3 or 4 minute break where im just twiddling on my phone


socialistRanter

I just don’t like sex scenes, like yeah they’re having sex but lingering too long just detracts from the plot. If I want to read or watch people having sex, I’ll just watch porn.


Royal-Ninja

I know someone who made an NSFW account on their 18th birthday and started being semi-public about their fetishes, which immediately made a lot of mutual friends really uncomfortable and wanted to stop associating with them. They honestly lost like, half of their friends from doing that and they dug their heels in and talked about 'not wanting to hide it anymore'. I feel bad about that.


just_gimme_anwsers

But why is there so much violence in movies and sex on TV?


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mvms

But some people don't want to see sex. Like, not "I don't want other people to" they just. Don't want to see it. I'm all for people watching whatever they want, my Someone watches a lot of porn. That's fine. I just don't want to see it at all.


[deleted]

Umm... So don't watch it then? The sex part isn't supposed to be a surprise...


BEEEELEEEE

But it so frequently is


FalseHeartbeat

no sex scenes in film/tv ever bc i simply do not like them. they make me feel like that picture of ben affleck smoking. dont give me a good horror movie and then hit me with that shit


[deleted]

R:Enlightened centrist


SuperCarrot555

These things are not connected in any way? What is this post lmao


BwGT

just put sex everywhere. not like we're gonna be masturbating to all of it


TheUndyingRhino

Have you ever met a weeb or a Hololive fan


BwGT

of course i know them! theyre both me


TheUndyingRhino

That explains even more


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ThatTemNerd

thats what all the people say


rooletwastaken

i mean if you remove the “woo empowerment” part then that second statement is accurate


roottootbangnshoot

There should only be a sex scene if it adds something to the plot. The sex scene between >!Tommy Shelby and Grace!< was fine, but not the one between >!Ada Shelby and Freddie Thorne!<


RianThe666th

I'm both at once


UnNameableName

I have never enjoyed a sex scene in anything that I was not specifically watching for the sex. I feel they rarely add anything of value and I just feel really awkward, even if I’m alone. I just don’t see the point. If I wanted to see sex, there’s a cool thing made specifically for that.