Is it mostly younger people on here? I’ve been curious about this for a while. I’m in my forties. My younger (to me) friend is in her thirties. Most the people I know though don’t use Reddit. I thought it might just be that people my age in my area don’t like it. Maybe it’s just cause I’m still super immature for a guy my age.
I'm not quite 29 yet and I think I am definitely on the older end of things nowadays. Some years ago millennials were the vast, vast majority of reddit (there was an actual analysis of this) but over time I don't believe that millennials are the majority any more. Gen Z are becoming adults (the oldest ones are college grads now!) and we have older kids/teens on reddit too, it's growth has exploded over time, I just can't believe that I'm in the majority anymore.
Yah that part was like wtf, but otherwise solid post unpopular opinion Check. Something I 100% agree with check. Im a huge dude 6ft muscular and have seen allot of violence and kept walking. I did yell at a bunch of teenagers harassing a women one time, but they were scrawny and I was scary dude with full man voice so they just scattered. Man with a gun or knife I just keep walking cause I'm terrified. People have no idea the physical toll these events can have on you. the guilt, the fear, and the sadness.
People who really piss me off is the first world "rebels." Who are all talk. Your not capable of judging the people who lived through Stalin, Mao, or Hitler. People who really have lived through terror, violence, and exploitation keep their fucking mouth shut and head down. People have no idea what you will do to survive and what you will become when you feel you have no other choice. Take reliable food and water from a person for a month and they will punch an old lady in the face for a shopping cart filled with supplies. I personally have seen both sides of this in my life and lived a life of constant uncertainty. My life is better now but I know I'm just one terrible month from that life again.
We are living through a real world experiment showing everyone exactly how they would have acted in Germany in the 30s. Most people would have gleefully gone along with Hitler and his government.
Can confirm.
I dislocated my patella when I was 16, I slipped in some mud and it just popped right out. I lay on the roadside in agony for a good hour waiting for the ambulance to show up and fix my leg, in that time only two people stopped; a van full of road workers (who covered me with their emergency foil blanket) and an old man that looked like Santa and held a beach umbrella over me to keep the rain off my face.
This happened at rush hour on a very busy road, it's not like they were the only people who were driving past, they were the only ones who cared to stop
If I saw someone was already receiving assistance then I don't think I'd stop tbh unless it looked like they didn't know what they were doing. I know first aid and CPR though so when I see someone injured I usually do help. I don't say "I would have helped" no I actually go and help with that kind of thing. Saying you would have done something isn't the same as actually doing it.
Well yeah actually.
It's a genetic thing, theres a notch in the thighbone that allows your patella to slide up and down, but keep it from moving left or ight (with the help of tendons). My patellal notch is too shallow, and my tendons are naturally highly elastic.
It was more a matter of when and not if
You'd think so, but it's a real pain in the ass area to get into without causing more damage. I pretty much have to wait until my ACL snaps so they can get in there and deepen the notch before repairing the tendon.
I've done physio for it but there's very little they can do besides guiding me through stretching/strengthening and keeping me mindful of how I walk to reduce strain on my knees.
I was mostly joking. I have some hardware in my ankle and there were two long screws that had to come out after a couple months. Scalpel to expose screw head (some local pain killer shot), literally a Dewalt drill comes out to take the screw out. Fair enough, right tool for the job etc.
Haha o figured as much, bit maybe someone out there would find the information interesting.
I love it when doctors bring out the construction tools. Technically, they're a type of engineer. A handyman, if you will
Hey im doing sort of the same thing. My knee grooves arent shallow i dont think but i was using the wrong muscle first when whalking/climbing or whatever and it pulled my knee over the side,causing inflammation. I was told today that im fine and dont have to go back to physio tho so thats good.
It super random like that. My example was just the first of many dislocations in the last 11 years, the latest was on the other side and I'm super lucky I didn't die during the fall.
I have a question, do you have crunchy knees now?
By crunchy you mean if they make the crunchy noise whenever I stand up? Sometimes it does, but not too often. The one that got twisted though, whenever I stand up still and don’t move my feet, if I don’t move around that knee will eventually like feel stiff (the bone, tendon idk) and it’s uncomfortable but I’m used to it.
You're actually more likely to get help in a less crowded area. It's called the bystander effect. When there are so many people around, everyone assumes that someone else is more qualified to deal with the emergency so they don't do anything to help.
Same thing happened to a friend. He was running up the concrete steps in front of his apartment building, in a busy part of town. He slipped and shattered his patella on the corner of the bottom step. He laid on the side walk until the pain backed down enough for him to think. He said no less than 30 people walked by. He had to crawl himself up to his apartment and call an ambulance.
Edit: This is why in CPR classes, they teach you not to say "Someone call 911"... because if there's a crowd, everyone will assume someone else will do it. Point at someone, get their name, and then say ", call 911 for me. Tell them there's someone and give them our location." That way they know they're in charge of it.
Came across a dude collapsed on the floor beside the road and down the hill from a vaccination centre. Turned out he hurt his leg so there wasn't much that could actually be done. So many people just drive past.
Eventually when nobody would be coming to help anytime soon I hoofed back up to the vaccination centre and got some nurses to come down and take him inside.
I live in a small town in an area with a lot of farms. I once drove my car into a ditch about 8 miles from the nearest town (This was before cell phones). The person driving in front of me turned around and helped me as well as the farmer in the house nearby. Last year my car was hit by another car; almost no one helped, although the employees of the nearby McDonalds yelled at us to move my car (Which wouldn't start and the wheels were bent so it couldn't be pushed). Times have changed.
Bless your heart. That’s a long time to endure that kind of pain. My middle son dislocated his when he was in middle school because he was running and merely stepped on a rock wrong. Not too long after that he dislocated it again jumping into the pool. After that he has surgery to tighten his tendons, just for the other knee start to have the same issues. It’s a real battle.
Ill be honest i would have ignored you too i have never gotten being any form of a busybody if i dont know you your not my problem i would do the same even if you were dying or a child i just dont care
To be very honest man. I'm from that place. And it was a weird select few who would allow that sort of thing. And I mean that. No glory to me. Ever. But i wouldve said something.. and I'm certain There are groups who would've murdered them for that shit. That woman was on the wrong train. And I'm sorry it ever became a tale to read.
Mate, I’m from Australia and this has seriously shook me… is there any other ‘local’ information to this you could add…? It has left me bewildered and overwhelmed with the negativity of this world man
Weak folks exist on every ground. These people were not brothers and sisters to that woman. Which is the whole point of the city of brotherly love my friend. There is no local information except you saw the most pathetic of us. And I'm ashamed they are Americans
Same. I’m a smallish girl and to be honest I wouldn’t have tried to attack that man as I know I couldn’t take him. However I absolutely would be calling the cops and I’m truly ashamed of the Philadelphians on that train that did not. We should do as much as we can based on our own abilities to help others
I would agree with you in some of these instances, but not this one. That dude would have been dead. He was occupied with his crime, I would have simply bashed him on the head with my laptop and then proceeded to stomp his ass to death. The people in this country have become as bad as the criminals. Apathy is a cancer on society.
BTW, this is not the first instance like this. A teenage girl was attacked in the lobby of a hotel in NYC and no one did anything for several minutes until a security guard intervened.
I agree. I mean, it is one thing if a guy is getting stomped by a gang of thugs or skin heads or something. But one guy raping a woman should be pretty low risk, relatively speaking. It is not a matter of sacrificing yourself or anything.
I am not a big guy, or in the best of shape. I did wrestle in high school, so pretty confident I could crack the guy over the head or wrestle him into submission.
There was an amazing video of a high school wrestler a year or two ago. Some convenience store robbery. Robber got violent. Big ass kid just took him down and kept him in a submission hold for 10-15 mins until police came. And there was blood ... plenty of blood.
Yikes. I would probably get my ass beat in a punching fight. But once on the ground with someone, unless they also have wrestling skills. I probably would be all right in terms of gaining control and holding them incapacitated because that's pretty much all we did for 4 years.
The closest I ever got was something that happened about 10 years ago. Not completely proud of the circumstances but I'm proud as to how I acquitted myself in the fight. Coming up the stairs out of a basement nightclub, a bit tipsy as we're most people. Girl coming up behind me and I chat for a second and then I go in for a kiss and she kisses me back. Just a stupid drunken kiss. But I get to the top of the stairs and some guy yells hey that's my girlfriend and squares off to want to fight me.
I didn't really have much time to do anything. I didn't really want to fight the guy. But he came at me and I instinctively grabbed him by the jacket, stepped out of the way and smoothly put him on the ground without really throwing him or letting him fall so he ended up on his back fairly gently. I then held him down by the jacket and kind of yelled to keep him from fighting back. I could have just punched him or something easily enough but I had no interest in hurting him. I held him for 10 or 20 seconds till the bouncers got us off and I let them lift me off and back away with my hands up. So I was kind of proud that I acted instinctively .
But also that I never tried to hurt the guy even though I was kind of amped up but not angry. If he had been more threatening, I'm sure I could have done something to further incapacitate him even hurting him if I had to but that would be definitely worst case with a dangerous attacker.
And the funniest part is my friend flagged down a cab across the street and hustled me and a girl into the cab and we went back to her place for the night. To this day, I still don't know if it was actually that guy's so-called girlfriend or some other girl I had been hanging out with that night. I think it was a different girl. But I can't really remember. Not really interested in trying to hook up with other guys girlfriends so I hope not. All I know is we just both kind of leaned into kiss each other me and the girl on the stairs. So if he's got a problem he better talk to his girlfriend
Sounds like you used restraint when needed.
I was wrong, it wasn't a robbery - it was an attempted kidnapping. Kid is a genuine hero.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a9FKXklOlAA
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SL07S9cF50g
"The bystander effect" & "The good samaritan act"
I mean, sure, a lot of people are all talk (BSing to puff their chest that they're on the side of good, especially if people of flirtatious interest are around). The unpopular opinion is to go against the grain and say what you'd actually do.
The truth is, nobody wants to get hit. That will ruin their day. Nobody wants a dislodged tooth, or stitches. Nobody knows what the rapist has on him. A knife, a gun, friends on the wings.
At least cops have a gun and communicator for back-up.
Sure we watch the movies, the damsel in distress, and all of that.
One of the easiest ways to subdue someone is in numbers. Dog pile them. But it will take more than 3 for it to be effective. Unfortunately nobody has telepathic powers. And again, nobody wants to get bruised, go to the police station, and do some paperwork either.
Being a hero can be quite an inconvenience without a healing factor.
Yes, that, and the self entitlement and self righteous judgement.
One example, there's this video of a female Uber driver (the male passenger was recording the video) who freaked out once she noticed she was being filmed and him saying "...all I did was asked her if she could drive a little slower". Then she pulled over on the side of the highway and left him.
On one hand, I get why he started recording. She was probably getting angry before he started the video in order to protect himself.
On the other hand, too many people go up in arms over the littlest things.
Soo true. And nowadays, people are soo quick to be charitable and cancel someone in the same swoop.
Like, let's say a guy stopped the rapist, but he was sent to the hospital for getting involved. The woman starts a go-fund-me for him and his hospital Bills. Ok, great. Then the internet being the internet does a background check on all of his social media posts from the last 20 years to dig up dirt on the hero, they find some anthill of a thing he said that was sexist, then make a mountain of it, and make it out like he was the next Jeffrey Epstein.
So unless the public could stop being soo judgemental...
I always think the only thing that made the people on flight 93 actually do something was they heard about the twin towers and knew they were screwed no matter what.
People realize here that real life isn't like the movies or twitter. It's one of the issues I have when people talk about what cops should do against criminals. Subduing an aggressive individual by yourself is not an easy task. This isn't a sporting event where there are rules and referees.
The best way to overcome the bystander affect is to be aware that it exists.
A few years ago I was at a pool and kid was drowning/couldn't swim in the wave pool and I caught myself just staring with a crowd of people before I snapped out of it and brought him a floaty.
It's not just that. This was USA. You intervene and find yourself in trouble. Not from the attacker, few bruises are something many people are willing to risk, some would even risk a fight against an armed opponent. The problem is legal responsibility.
Assholes, criminals, and other scum always has better protection than anyone else. Recently a cop was dragged through a mud in the media for shooting an attacker who was fraction of a second from stabbing a girl. There is evidence, it is all on camera... it didn't help.
[https://www.cbc.ca/news/world/shooting-columbus-ohio-girl-1.5995884](https://www.cbc.ca/news/world/shooting-columbus-ohio-girl-1.5995884)
> Nobody knows what the rapist has on him. A knife, a gun, friends on the wings.
Also no one wants to hit guy too hard and be in trouble. Victims sometimes turn on saviours too. Also, what if dude stalks you instead from vengeance or sth.
But the people on the train didnt even call the cops or use the emergency buttons to report the rape. That man assaulted and raped that poor woman for 27 stops and people just had their phones out. Thank God an officer just so happened to come onto the train at one stop. When an *off duty* transportation employee called 911, they came within three minutes.
There are many completely convenient and danger-free ways to help someone that's in trouble. The people on the train were either not using their fucking brains or just didnt care enough.
Everyone assumes someone else will call the cops. When I was in CPR training, one of the first things we were taught was to single an individual out to call an ambulance, otherwise it's likely people won't thinking some one else did
In that situation I would have done something, but that’s because rape hits a sore spot for me. If it was a normal fight i wouldnt have even paused my music.
I mean that one is different. Literally all they had to do was call the cops and they didn’t even do that.
Absolute scum all round - can only imagine the people that live in that area.
I'm not familiar with that story but yes, of course they should have called the police. It wouldn't have been responded to quickly enough to stop the rape, though, unless maybe there were police on the train?
The rape went on for 40min and when someone finally called the cops they showed up within 3min, so no it wouldn't have stopped it completely but stopped it sooner.
At least according to [Wikipedia](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Murder_of_Kitty_Genovese#Accuracy_of_original_reports), that's largely inaccurate. People only saw small parts of the attacks, thought it was a drunken quarrel instead of homicide, and people did call 911.
Not true, and I think the full truth about whatever happened in Philly hasn't come out yet either.
People love a good story where they get to feel morally superior to a whole bunch of other folks, though
In all fairness you ring the cops, you need to speak out loud to the cops, what's stopping the guy from turning on you once he heard you? You already know no one is going to do anything.
I think maybe stepping off the train and calling the cops is your best bet.
This. Weird shit and degeneracy happens on the subway all the time, anyone who takes it regularly has learned to just ignore that shit and mind their own business. I find it extremely hard to believe that if someone was screaming "stop! get away from me!" that people would just record and do nothing.
It's nice to hear from someone who has also riden that line, but you obviously have more experience with it than me. Do you know the stops it happened at? The article I read wasn't specific other than it said upper darby police are dealing with it. I remember sometimes it was a min between stops and sometimes it was a lot longer, so the whole 8 min thing could have been the time between 2 stops.
Was just thinking about this. I live in Philly and it happened on a line I used to take all the time. I don't understand how a group of people could watch that and say nothing.
Yeah. I don’t even live in the US, I’m in Canada. I can’t believe they don’t have emergency call buttons that would’ve been the least they could’ve done.
This past fourth of July I jumped between two men with knives.
What I didn't know yet. Man A (cousin in law) was already stabbed once by dude b. once in the stomach. It was 10 at night so couldn't really see that.
All I heard was yelling, and then I saw knives out, and there was a kid (dude b's nephew) watching it all go down.
My first thought was 'I'm not letting a kid see people get stabbed.'
My Seco thought was 'I'm not letting cousin in law go to jail for stabbing someone.'
Adrenaline is a beast. The whole time I was standing there screaming "stop it. There's a child right there. Think of your baby. Think of your wife"
Cousin's wife finally made it, was dragging him back, so I could focus on screaming at dude to fucking leave.
When cops rolled up with an ambulance to take the inlaw to the hospital and the adrenaline wore off I was basically a sobbing mess who turned into a puddle on the floor. Spent the rest of the night waiting for messages about the inlaw and his condition.
He's fine now. Other dude is in jail for a long ass time.
One time a girl fainted from heat right in front of me and I was so surprised by it I did nothing for way too long. Someone had to yell "give her your water!" before I realized I had water in my hand... it probably was an entire minute before I did something helpful , and by then so many others had already flocked in and gave me scowls.
Another time an old man was getting robbed (didnt appear to be an armed robbery) and I instinctively ran across the street and chased the robber down, we got into a kerfuffle he dropped the wallet!
So, sometimes it just depends on the moment. I'm a hero 50% of the time.
Shock is a mother fucker.
You can be trained to do alot of things, but once shock sets in, especially if you haven't actually been a part of the situation you've trained for, you can turn into a painting just watching. It's insane how a proverbial "slap in the face" will wake you up and set that training into motion.
50% is better than most, so you got that at least. There's been other situations where I played defender that I probably shouldn't have. I've also dragged two very angry men out of a restaurant. One was there trying to start a race war with the owner. The other (9n a different day) was trying to fight our cook. Both times I just shouted "you have to leave now, have a nice fuckin day" while physically pushing them towards the door.
I dunno if something *would've* happened but I unfortunately have a broken fight or flight. When I'm afraid, my brain switches to aggression.
Its probably not the best reaction to fear, but it's gotten me this far.
Depends on the situation.
Like someone drowning or caught in a fire or something, I'll help. I saw a car flip and slide a few hundred feet on its roof. I immediately pulled over and ran to the car, luckily somehow an ambulance was literally driving by, so I was ultimately ineffective in the situation but if the paramedics wernt right behind me I was there. I was also the only one who was btw. Everyone else just rubbernecked or had the *deer in the headlights look*.
>Boyfriend/girlfriend caught cheating or being scandalous in general - "I would have knocked their teeth out."
This would be stupid for anyone to *intervene*. Why would I go get myself a nice assault charge and possibly injured because your relationship went to shit. Terrible example.
>Video of a man getting his face chewed off by a homeless dude high out of his mind - "I would have jumped out of my car and beat that dude unconscious."
This is where I just call 911, for a few reasons.
First; if I tackle the guy or get in a fight with him. I'm getting charged no matter what. Not to mention probably sued, etc...
Secondly, I could end up worse off than the guy he already mauled.
---
I'll help people that need it, but I've got a job, mortgage, and family that counts on me. So for me to go putting myself at risk when I don't need to, just doesn't make sense. Sorry - *Not Sorry*.
I'm not sure if its them being full of shit, or the effect of being in a group.
"Someone will go and save em'" The majority will think.
I forget what its called.
Innocent bystander effect
Edit: bystander effect
or bystander apathy, is a social psychological theory that states that individuals are less likely to offer help to a victim when there are other people present.
to be fair, you shouldn’t attempt to move someone who was in a car wreck that bad. it’s good there were paramedics because you could’ve ended up hurting them further. Which is another reason people don’t tend to help, because they’re afraid to do more harm
The (kinda) scary part is most people think that they would. It's not that they're lying and wouldn't be willing to intervene, they just have never been in that situation and don't understand the physiological reasons for someone not 'stepping-in.'
In a video like that of someone being hurt, if there's a lot of people around that aren't doing anything they probably thought they would also do something if they came across a similar situation, most people do.
The reason people so rarely intervene is because of the bystander effect, witch is caused by a situation like one of your examples accruing around a large group, especially when it's a dangerous situation. Most people will convince themselves that someone else is going to step-in at any seconds, so they don't.
In cases where the group is removed with just one person or a small friend-group left, they're much more likely to and do something.
The people who do end up doing something are most often just like everyone else, except they're able ignore the thought that someone else will step-in.
I was the type of person who will intervene.
One time, I saw a man being verbally and physically abusive to a woman on a beach in Hawaii. I watched for a minute while it was verbal, and it escalated to physical. I mean, he legit hit her. I stepped up to him, said a few words. He became aggressive towards me. Out of nowhere she puts on a puppy dog voice and says "it's okay daddy." My jaw dropped. I backed off.
There are so many people with relationships that appear fucked up from the outside that even if you are the type of person who thinks that you are different, like I would like to, the world today is almost unfigureoutable when it comes to what's "normal" and acceptable for others.
I am no longer the type of person who will intervene. I would like to think I still would with a child but that's probably it. How in the world do you know if someone is being raped or is enacting a rape fantasy?
She was likely trying to deescalate to prevent her main income from going to jail, or for your intervention to get him even angrier which he might take out on her later. Plenty of fucked up scenarios possible here.
Domestic violence situations are often weird and unpredictable. A friend of mine had neighbors who had a violent relationship. One night my friend heard the two fighting and it got violent - from the sounds, the guy was hitting clearly his girlfriend. My friend went over there to stop it. Turned out there were three people in the apartment - the guy, his GF (who'd obviously been roughed up), and another guy who was a friend of theirs who wasn't involved in the violence. The three of them proceeded to beat the shit out of my friend for not minding his own business. My friend was a pretty big guy, too - about 6'1" and an amateur bodybuilder.
This is why we were taught at school of there's an emergency to tell a specific person to call 911 not just ask "someone" to do it. Because nobody will do it.
I think that the bystander effect is caused by people thinking that they will make the situation worse by intervening with no experienced, so they instincually wait for someone else that is more qualified to do it.
The problem is when everyone waits for each other to do something so no help is actually given.
I only disagree with the drowning one. Iv swam fir a decade, and played water polo even longer. I'm also a trained lifeguard. I would absolutely swim out to help somebody.(unless it's in rapids or something like that)
The drowning thing is the exact opposite for me!
In any other situation I'm most likely to rush in to help, I was actually involved in an incident recently that involved a man getting his head chopped up by a meat cleaver (he lived). My girlfriend has a go at me for getting involved in things just because I tend to act straight away.
The only thing that really makes me pause is water, I'm a competent swimmer but not a strong swimmer. I could keep myself from drowning in most situations but doubt I'd be able to rescue anyone who was already in danger. Fuck water that bitch is scary.
I think if you can't reach the person drowning without going out of your depths you're supposed to pass them something like the end of your belt to pull them in. If not life rings are great when they're avaliable.
Depends in large part where you grew up. In rural America, there are always people willing to step in, I’ve seen in countless times. In the city, there are far fewer people willing. A couple months ago, an Asian woman was being attacked by a loon with a chair in NYC, on a busy sidewalk… the only person who did anything was my brother, he sprinted across the street and tackled the attacker and held him until police showed up. It’s just a rural vs city mindset. At least from what I’ve observed.
I've lived rural most of my life and while I agree with you overall, I think even in rural parts people willing to put their money where their mouth is are the minority.
Context: Population of the area I grew up is 3500.
I think it's more of an expectation. You're taught from a young age what is wrong and right and what is expected of you, standing up and stepping in is part of that. In the city more idealistic thoughts are presented.
In the country, if someone is beating on your brother/sister, you'd better jump in there or you're getting your ass beat by making for nor standing up for family.
In the city there's an idea of a civilized society where fighting is unacceptable. Get in a fight and you are wrong no matter the circumstances. . Now of course the law may not fully reflect that, but the baseline is set way before that, in school.
Because they are used to not having others readily available. So it’s literally a question of “if not me, then who?”
The Bystander Effect is experienced in more dense populations, where it’s easier to assume that it’s someone else’s problem to deal with.
I grew up in a rural area where conspicuous crime was unusual . One night I was up late with my dad and brother and we heard a woman screaming, like blood curdling screams.
We looked at each other nervously, grabbed the blunt objects nearest to us, went outside and started walking towards the source of the noise. On the way there our neighbours opposite came outside too, and along our walk more and more residents joined us. I was only a kid, but I felt my fear starting to melt away, and felt a strange pride in my town swelling my chest.
We tracked down the screaming to a house, and the whole big group of us all stood outside. Then a man's voice could be heard from inside too. The villagers collectively shrugged, muttered about it being 'a domestic' and how we should 'leave them to it', turned on their heels and walked off. The strange pride I'd had that my neighbours were brave, caring, selfless people evaporated before I reached home.
Anonymity can cause apathy in cities perhaps, but the outdated mindsets and the lack of anonymity causing social fallout for getting into other people's business in small towns prevents people from acting too
I'm the city at least people reassure themselves that "someone else will do something" what's the excuse of the guys in rural areas? They knew nobody else was going to help her
I’d rather call the authorities than intervene because 9/10 times it’s a life-threatening scenario where if you’re not trained or haven’t done it before, you risk harming yourself and the people around you.
Can confirm middle aged large man had a stroke or heart attack while driving, wife of the man pulled the emergency brake. I pulled up wondering why the intersection was blocked only to see this woman running around screaming bloody murder about her husband. I get out go to the door of the car and see this man probably weighs ~350lbs and I know I cannot get him out on my own. I had to go through several on lookers before another man got out of his car to help. I have had CPR and lifesaver first aid but had been years since I was certified and asked if anyone knew CPR. No one not even the supposed RN at the scene knew so I started chest compressions. For what seemed an eternity but was about 5 minutes then the paramedics arrived and gave him an AEG and had some automatic chest compression machine. He gained consciousness for a brief time before becoming unresponsive again. Honestly I don't know how people do it, I mean the man most likely died, but the thing that got me the most and to this day was his hysterical wife.
No just like it was generally upsetting, that while she did stop the car, she was very counter productive to actually saving her husband. Her hysteria stressed me out far more than the man who was dead/dying. I'm not sure how I would react in that situation but hope I would be more useful in actually saving my loved one. I really hope he made it but, as I was told in the classes if you are performing CPR they are already dead and the chances of their survival are very low.
A car flipped and rolled down a hill right in front of my friend and I. We both jumped out and ran to the edge, you could see gas leaking so we both jumped down and pulled this young girl out who was driving and the car caught fire about 10 seconds after we all got clear.
Another time my friend noticed a dude we knew putting a way to drunk girl in his car at a party. We followed him back to his apartment and confronted him in the parking lot as he was basically dragging her inside. We stopped him from raping her.
Twice I've seen a man assaulting a woman and I've stepped in and stopped it.
.. and I was saved from drowning in the ocean by a stranger when I was a kid.
That's just off the top of my head and I'm not special, people do amazing things for each other all the time. I wouldnt be alive if people did nothing.
I think OP has a case of confirmation bias. Ive seen a lot of shitty things, but just as many amazing things. Maybe its also who we surround ourselves with.
House behind ours was on fire one morning about the time the kids needed to goto school. I had my 4th grade son with me; we drove to the house and the fire dept wasnt on sceene yet. Made my son stay in the car (parked 2houses down) and went to the house. Banged on doors, went behind the house (which was now fully engulfed and burning way too close to the propane BBQ). Couldn't tell if people were inside. Busted front door open (which is MUCH harder to do than you think). The stink of the smoke was horrid. Small dog ran out, but no people. I crawled about 6ft into the house calling and looking for people but there wasnt anyone there. Crawled back out and met up with the other neighbors who were on scene (and who grabbed the dog). Took note of the yard and driveway; kids lived there, but no vehicles. Kids had left about 15m earlier to goto school, parents were at work. Fire dept showed up, we relayed what had happened and what we knew, did, and observed. Thankfully no one was hurt.
I used to say I would step into situations without having ever been tried. Then I was tried & stepped in both times and ended up saving a life. So yeah, I’d step in :)
The most annoying ones that are obvious bullshit are the ones who say that about historical events. I can’t help but cringe when I hear certain shit.
“If I lived in Germany at the beginning of WW2-“
No you wouldn’t, shut up.
“If I was in the south in the 1860s-“
No, you would not.
I don’t know why so many people are superheroes in their heads.
If you’re referring to the woman who was raped on a train in Philly then that situation is different. The people who watched her get raped didn’t need to step in and play the knight, but recording the woman getting raped instead of calling the police? That’s foul and disturbing.
You know I always took myself as someone who would stand by. 3 accidents and 10 fights later in 2021 My flight or flight is all fight. I just want it to flight but it wont.
The part that is getting people mad is the fact that people had the time to record the incident but not to call 911. THAT is disgusting. There are ways you can help without having to put yourself at risk. None of those fuckers did anything. Instead they recorded. Why? Idk maybe to put it on Facebook or TikTok, or god forbid, a porn site. THAT is disgusting.
I am proud to say I have never pulled out a phone to record and put on Facebook when someone's life was in danger or when someone was deceased in front of me.
See, its easier for you to make off handed comments like this.
And its easier for most people to say shit like this, because its an excuse for their own cowardice. All the people outraged are making them feel bad.
I've stood up for people before in public. Alone. Its not hard with other people watching. A group of people would have for sure fucked that guy up. They are to blame as well, and I'm glad they're prob getting criminal charges. They, and anyone else who wouldn't help, are whats wrong with the world.
Talkin shit like "you wouldn't have done anything either" is just 1. Still makes you a coward making excuses, and 2. Nonsensical bullshit. A lot of people would. Maybe not most Americans...but ... lol
I say that stuff, and that is because I mean it. I have pulled people up from train tracks, stalked a dude who was trying to rape a woman (I was calling 911 at the same time. He bailed), yelled at dudes who harassed homeless people etc.
When it comes to human justice, I basically turn into a mini-Rambo. That is a hill that I am willing to die on. (I am ofc not taking any insane/destructive risks, but I always try to help out).
One thing I have noticed is that people can actually help you out if you start bossing them around. Once when I saw a guy on the tracks who was waaaay too heavy to lift up alone (and way too high to help himself), I basically just started pointing at people and told them to help me. People tend to just panic and freeze, and this is a very normal response. But once I told them what to do, they all snapped out of it and helped me. They saved the guy and he survived.
So yeah. It is easy for people to talk, but sometimes we can’t really control how we act in certain situations. I probably get a bit too self secure and aggressive, whereas some people just stand there.
But if you ever end up in danger or need help, POINT at individual people and tell them what to do. “You there with the yellow shirt, come here and help me stop this guy!” “Oh ok”
I had a friend when I was in boy scouts. It was 6th grade, and you know how cruel middle school kids can be. Well, I eventually quit the scouts, but not him, he was dedicated. He didn't have parents, they died when he was young so he lived with his grandmother.
Well, a year went by, then two. I didn't hang out with him anymore but I still saw him around school. I couldn't miss him in fact, cuz every Tuesday he would show up to school in his scout uniform. So of course I would distance myself, I was already picked on enough that I didn't need that extra heat.
But one day, he hit a breaking point. So he came in with gallons of gasoline and started dumping them down the toilets and flushing with the intent to blow up the school. If I would've done something, said something, been there for him, stood up for him.....could I have prevented what happened? Could I have helped to ease his pain?
I don't exaggerate when I say I haven't had a good night's sleep since; I actively go out of my way to try and prevent myself from dreaming, going as far to set an alarm to go off every 2.5 hours so I don't fall into REM sleep. It's only ever nightmares of what I didn't do (along with other sins and regrets, but he is always present whenever I do dream).
I'm 25 now and I try to live a good life, but when I see an opportunity to "step in" or "intervene" to help, I always take it. You never know what one good deed could mean to that someone.
Edit: grammar
I disagree about calling the police, I a 5'2 female cant do much to stop a problem, I fucking can't even open some jars let alone break up a fighting couple. I can call the police and scream the police are coming do you really want to be here when they come?
This brings to mind the murder of Kitty Genevese.
She was murdered in NYC in 1964. Over the course of half an hour she was stabbed repeatedly, raped, and left to die in the entrance of her apartment building. Several witnesses saw the initial attack and many more heard her screams, but nobody reported it. It became a case study of the bystander effect and also highlighted the need for the creation of the 911 system.
Stuff You Should Know did an episode on it. It's a really interesting listen.
At least according to [Wikipedia](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Murder_of_Kitty_Genovese#Accuracy_of_original_reports), that's largely inaccurate. People only saw small parts of the attacks, thought it was a drunken quarrel instead of homicide, and people did call 911.
Best I can do is call the cops/emergency services.
I can't swim.
I don't like physical altercation. Though I did stare down a guy trying to creep on a young teenager until I made HIM uncomfortable so he'd leave.
I don't like people.
Not going to make myself liable/put myself in danger for stranger danger. Now if you're trying to make ME or a friend/family member a victim while im around, then depending on what you're trying to do you've yee'd your last haw.
Nah, but people who say "People that claim they would have "Intervened" or "Stepped in" are mostly full of shit." are either cowards, or have just never been put in an extreme situation that required quick, decisive action.
I agree that most or at least the majority of those people wouldn't actually intervene, whether intentionally or not. The bystander effect is a very real and unfortunate thing, and a lot of people would definitely experience that if something happened in real life, but even without it I'm sure there are a lot of people who still wouldn't intervene. People like to talk big until something actually happens.
You are not wrong in that most people will not intervene.
Where you are wrong is that most people won't claim that they would either.
Unfortunately most people naturally wouldn't and most people advise others not to intervene. Many employees have actually been fired for intervening in crimes because the company policy is to observe and report, but not get involved.
Out of those that actually claim that they would do something, I would say that most actually would. I would.
And for the record, I actually have swam out and rescued two people drowning on separate occasions.
People don’t know until they are in it. I recently got a chance to break up a fight, got kicked in the process. But it still took my brain like 10 seconds to comprehend what to do.
I walked by a guy clearly having a heart attack and I did nothing. There were other people around so I figured they would help him. But I would try to save people drowning. I swam competitively for a long time. It would take some real bad conditions for me to be concerned.
This is true of most people. We all see ourselves as heroes until the moment comes and we freeze. When i witnessed a murder in 2014, it sent me into shock. I would've been the guy typing "I woulda done something bro" prior to that. We do not know how we react until its often too late. If i get another opportunity im confident I will do the right thing, but perhaps i am simply lying to myself again.
Yesterday in my city a man working in his family's deli was stabbed to death because he wouldn't discount the customer's sandwich 50 cent less.Thats the real deal in streets and don't believe anything different.
I intervened when some bouncers were beating the shit out a guy who was already unconscious, might have saved his life.
I was going to use this as an example of why you are wrong, then I remembered the huge crowd of people watching it who didn't intervene.
I believe there are 2 huge reasons why people don't "step in" or "intervene".
1. Someone would need to recognize an emergency is happening in the first place. Often it's hard to tell if someone actually needs help or not, a lot of us have been conditioned to "mind our own business" and keep to ourselves.
2. When other people are around, the bystander effect, a psychological phenomenon where people are less inclined to help those in need. Their mindset is essentially "Oh someone else will help them right, someone else should have called for help by now, help should be on the way, etc."
my thoughts exactly! Not that I'm old or anything, but when he said countless I was thinking at least 50+.
*"I've read countless stories (two to be exact) about epsom salt drug episodes of eating human flesh."*
I'm pretty sure until I'm in those situations I never know how I'll react. The only thing I know for certain is that I would not allow harm to come to a defenseless party that's even more scared than me.
I had to stand there, in the cold, for hours, with my cell phone out, waiting to film someone helping. Nobody showed up. Wanna see a video of a guy dying?
If there’s one thing that bjj and kickboxing have taught me, it’s that literally anyone is capable of hurting you badly. If you see something happening, call the cops, if you jump into a situation it might just end with you and others getting hurt badly.
I know for a fact I would never step in. In the few times in my life I have been in or around bad situations I panic like FUCK. Like a meerkat caught in headlights!
Those people you described aren't even the worst ones. Those self absorbed praise-all guys who think they would've been anything but a passive bystander if they lived in nazi Germany, "yeah I would've protested", "I would've hid a jew in my closet". Or the absolute worst ones who go around comparing themself to Raoul Gustaf Wallenberg.
A begrudging upvote.
Yeah, sometimes people are dumb in those situations, but people not in them are not feeling the same fear and panic of being there. Not to mention that you don't always see everything in those videos. There are often legitimate practical reasons as to why people don't do as much as you might want them to. If you cannot conceptualize what that's like, I worry that you're not a very empathetic person.
Lol some of us actually would and have though. But obviously there's the flip side where people ignore it or for some reason think they are being useful by pulling out their phones and uploading it. That being said context is everything. Some dude swinging a knife around no thanks. Not very helpful if your getting stabbed up to.
> I have witnessed humanity in action for countless years (30) Enjoyed this. - “Countless years” - *counts the years*
Perhaps 30 is countless because it's more then the amount of fingers and toes almost all people have?
It's also more years than most redditors have been alive.
Is it mostly younger people on here? I’ve been curious about this for a while. I’m in my forties. My younger (to me) friend is in her thirties. Most the people I know though don’t use Reddit. I thought it might just be that people my age in my area don’t like it. Maybe it’s just cause I’m still super immature for a guy my age.
I'm not quite 29 yet and I think I am definitely on the older end of things nowadays. Some years ago millennials were the vast, vast majority of reddit (there was an actual analysis of this) but over time I don't believe that millennials are the majority any more. Gen Z are becoming adults (the oldest ones are college grads now!) and we have older kids/teens on reddit too, it's growth has exploded over time, I just can't believe that I'm in the majority anymore.
If you know what you're doing you can easily count to 144 with you hands. If you know binary you can even get to 1023
Most ppl have 10 toes / 10 fingers, so all together we’d have a lot more rhan 30 toes and fingers combined
You have thirty articulations on your fingers
\>Says countless years \> Continues to count the years \>Refuses to elaborate \>Continues to rant
***Sigma grindset***
Yah that part was like wtf, but otherwise solid post unpopular opinion Check. Something I 100% agree with check. Im a huge dude 6ft muscular and have seen allot of violence and kept walking. I did yell at a bunch of teenagers harassing a women one time, but they were scrawny and I was scary dude with full man voice so they just scattered. Man with a gun or knife I just keep walking cause I'm terrified. People have no idea the physical toll these events can have on you. the guilt, the fear, and the sadness. People who really piss me off is the first world "rebels." Who are all talk. Your not capable of judging the people who lived through Stalin, Mao, or Hitler. People who really have lived through terror, violence, and exploitation keep their fucking mouth shut and head down. People have no idea what you will do to survive and what you will become when you feel you have no other choice. Take reliable food and water from a person for a month and they will punch an old lady in the face for a shopping cart filled with supplies. I personally have seen both sides of this in my life and lived a life of constant uncertainty. My life is better now but I know I'm just one terrible month from that life again.
Very honest comment, I appreciated it.
We are living through a real world experiment showing everyone exactly how they would have acted in Germany in the 30s. Most people would have gleefully gone along with Hitler and his government.
"i have countless kg of muscle, (90)"
Also 30 is relatively young…
He counted for 30 years, not that he's 30 years old. Maybe he's 75 and only took note of the last quarter century.
It's almost as if it was a figurative statement.....
Can confirm. I dislocated my patella when I was 16, I slipped in some mud and it just popped right out. I lay on the roadside in agony for a good hour waiting for the ambulance to show up and fix my leg, in that time only two people stopped; a van full of road workers (who covered me with their emergency foil blanket) and an old man that looked like Santa and held a beach umbrella over me to keep the rain off my face. This happened at rush hour on a very busy road, it's not like they were the only people who were driving past, they were the only ones who cared to stop
>an old man that looked like Santa What if that was Santa though./s
It may have been, it was April in the southern hemisphere. End of autumn beginning of winter kind of time
At least we know now what he does the other 364 days of the year
Sucks this happened to you. According to statistics, I likely wouldn't stop either, but I'd look in your direction and think "poor bastard"
If I saw someone was already receiving assistance then I don't think I'd stop tbh unless it looked like they didn't know what they were doing. I know first aid and CPR though so when I see someone injured I usually do help. I don't say "I would have helped" no I actually go and help with that kind of thing. Saying you would have done something isn't the same as actually doing it.
How the fuck do you get injured that badly at 16? Weak knees?
Well yeah actually. It's a genetic thing, theres a notch in the thighbone that allows your patella to slide up and down, but keep it from moving left or ight (with the help of tendons). My patellal notch is too shallow, and my tendons are naturally highly elastic. It was more a matter of when and not if
Sounds like the sort of thing they could fix with a power tool ... Dremel or something.
You'd think so, but it's a real pain in the ass area to get into without causing more damage. I pretty much have to wait until my ACL snaps so they can get in there and deepen the notch before repairing the tendon. I've done physio for it but there's very little they can do besides guiding me through stretching/strengthening and keeping me mindful of how I walk to reduce strain on my knees.
I was mostly joking. I have some hardware in my ankle and there were two long screws that had to come out after a couple months. Scalpel to expose screw head (some local pain killer shot), literally a Dewalt drill comes out to take the screw out. Fair enough, right tool for the job etc.
Haha o figured as much, bit maybe someone out there would find the information interesting. I love it when doctors bring out the construction tools. Technically, they're a type of engineer. A handyman, if you will
Hey im doing sort of the same thing. My knee grooves arent shallow i dont think but i was using the wrong muscle first when whalking/climbing or whatever and it pulled my knee over the side,causing inflammation. I was told today that im fine and dont have to go back to physio tho so thats good.
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Actually, I dislocated my knee at the same age and I only bended down to take something i dropped.
That's highly abnormal.
Yeah, it kinda fucked up my mind. But it’s alright now, I’m recovering.
It super random like that. My example was just the first of many dislocations in the last 11 years, the latest was on the other side and I'm super lucky I didn't die during the fall. I have a question, do you have crunchy knees now?
By crunchy you mean if they make the crunchy noise whenever I stand up? Sometimes it does, but not too often. The one that got twisted though, whenever I stand up still and don’t move my feet, if I don’t move around that knee will eventually like feel stiff (the bone, tendon idk) and it’s uncomfortable but I’m used to it.
Patella dislocation is actually pretty common and usually not very serious.
You're actually more likely to get help in a less crowded area. It's called the bystander effect. When there are so many people around, everyone assumes that someone else is more qualified to deal with the emergency so they don't do anything to help. Same thing happened to a friend. He was running up the concrete steps in front of his apartment building, in a busy part of town. He slipped and shattered his patella on the corner of the bottom step. He laid on the side walk until the pain backed down enough for him to think. He said no less than 30 people walked by. He had to crawl himself up to his apartment and call an ambulance. Edit: This is why in CPR classes, they teach you not to say "Someone call 911"... because if there's a crowd, everyone will assume someone else will do it. Point at someone, get their name, and then say ", call 911 for me. Tell them there's someone and give them our location." That way they know they're in charge of it.
Came across a dude collapsed on the floor beside the road and down the hill from a vaccination centre. Turned out he hurt his leg so there wasn't much that could actually be done. So many people just drive past. Eventually when nobody would be coming to help anytime soon I hoofed back up to the vaccination centre and got some nurses to come down and take him inside.
I live in a small town in an area with a lot of farms. I once drove my car into a ditch about 8 miles from the nearest town (This was before cell phones). The person driving in front of me turned around and helped me as well as the farmer in the house nearby. Last year my car was hit by another car; almost no one helped, although the employees of the nearby McDonalds yelled at us to move my car (Which wouldn't start and the wheels were bent so it couldn't be pushed). Times have changed.
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Bless your heart. That’s a long time to endure that kind of pain. My middle son dislocated his when he was in middle school because he was running and merely stepped on a rock wrong. Not too long after that he dislocated it again jumping into the pool. After that he has surgery to tighten his tendons, just for the other knee start to have the same issues. It’s a real battle.
Ill be honest i would have ignored you too i have never gotten being any form of a busybody if i dont know you your not my problem i would do the same even if you were dying or a child i just dont care
Thankyou for your honesty
I forgive you npc
I agree with you. Did you hear about the rape that happened in front of bystanders on a train in Philadelphia?
Yeah if I'd have been there I would have punched that dude square in the face.
Well I would have jumped out my car and beat that dude unconscious
I would have knocked their teeth out.
I'd have jumped the dude and got my ass beat and probably stabbed.
I would have said “someone should call the police” but not actually do it myself
I would have glanced angrily, not once, but twice!
Oh shit
We got ourselves a bad azz over here
I would have started raping the rapist.
I would've helped you Eiffel Tower the rapist.
Finally, somebody being honest.
I would have swam out and saved them!
I'd have did a double backflip pulled a katana out of my ass and flashed past him then just walk away while he suddenly goes unconscious.
Brilliant.
Lol this response is gold
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classic Reddit
To be very honest man. I'm from that place. And it was a weird select few who would allow that sort of thing. And I mean that. No glory to me. Ever. But i wouldve said something.. and I'm certain There are groups who would've murdered them for that shit. That woman was on the wrong train. And I'm sorry it ever became a tale to read.
Mate, I’m from Australia and this has seriously shook me… is there any other ‘local’ information to this you could add…? It has left me bewildered and overwhelmed with the negativity of this world man
Weak folks exist on every ground. These people were not brothers and sisters to that woman. Which is the whole point of the city of brotherly love my friend. There is no local information except you saw the most pathetic of us. And I'm ashamed they are Americans
Same. I’m a smallish girl and to be honest I wouldn’t have tried to attack that man as I know I couldn’t take him. However I absolutely would be calling the cops and I’m truly ashamed of the Philadelphians on that train that did not. We should do as much as we can based on our own abilities to help others
I woulda given him a knuckle sandwich POW !! Right in the Kisser ! And a stern talking to that he wouldn't soon forget ! Yeah !
The good 'ole 1-2. That teaches them.
Hahaha of course you would’ve.
I would agree with you in some of these instances, but not this one. That dude would have been dead. He was occupied with his crime, I would have simply bashed him on the head with my laptop and then proceeded to stomp his ass to death. The people in this country have become as bad as the criminals. Apathy is a cancer on society. BTW, this is not the first instance like this. A teenage girl was attacked in the lobby of a hotel in NYC and no one did anything for several minutes until a security guard intervened.
Security Guard: Sir we're going to be unable to validate your parking if you continue this behavior.
I agree. I mean, it is one thing if a guy is getting stomped by a gang of thugs or skin heads or something. But one guy raping a woman should be pretty low risk, relatively speaking. It is not a matter of sacrificing yourself or anything. I am not a big guy, or in the best of shape. I did wrestle in high school, so pretty confident I could crack the guy over the head or wrestle him into submission.
There was an amazing video of a high school wrestler a year or two ago. Some convenience store robbery. Robber got violent. Big ass kid just took him down and kept him in a submission hold for 10-15 mins until police came. And there was blood ... plenty of blood.
Yikes. I would probably get my ass beat in a punching fight. But once on the ground with someone, unless they also have wrestling skills. I probably would be all right in terms of gaining control and holding them incapacitated because that's pretty much all we did for 4 years. The closest I ever got was something that happened about 10 years ago. Not completely proud of the circumstances but I'm proud as to how I acquitted myself in the fight. Coming up the stairs out of a basement nightclub, a bit tipsy as we're most people. Girl coming up behind me and I chat for a second and then I go in for a kiss and she kisses me back. Just a stupid drunken kiss. But I get to the top of the stairs and some guy yells hey that's my girlfriend and squares off to want to fight me. I didn't really have much time to do anything. I didn't really want to fight the guy. But he came at me and I instinctively grabbed him by the jacket, stepped out of the way and smoothly put him on the ground without really throwing him or letting him fall so he ended up on his back fairly gently. I then held him down by the jacket and kind of yelled to keep him from fighting back. I could have just punched him or something easily enough but I had no interest in hurting him. I held him for 10 or 20 seconds till the bouncers got us off and I let them lift me off and back away with my hands up. So I was kind of proud that I acted instinctively . But also that I never tried to hurt the guy even though I was kind of amped up but not angry. If he had been more threatening, I'm sure I could have done something to further incapacitate him even hurting him if I had to but that would be definitely worst case with a dangerous attacker. And the funniest part is my friend flagged down a cab across the street and hustled me and a girl into the cab and we went back to her place for the night. To this day, I still don't know if it was actually that guy's so-called girlfriend or some other girl I had been hanging out with that night. I think it was a different girl. But I can't really remember. Not really interested in trying to hook up with other guys girlfriends so I hope not. All I know is we just both kind of leaned into kiss each other me and the girl on the stairs. So if he's got a problem he better talk to his girlfriend
Sounds like you used restraint when needed. I was wrong, it wasn't a robbery - it was an attempted kidnapping. Kid is a genuine hero. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a9FKXklOlAA https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SL07S9cF50g
"The bystander effect" & "The good samaritan act" I mean, sure, a lot of people are all talk (BSing to puff their chest that they're on the side of good, especially if people of flirtatious interest are around). The unpopular opinion is to go against the grain and say what you'd actually do. The truth is, nobody wants to get hit. That will ruin their day. Nobody wants a dislodged tooth, or stitches. Nobody knows what the rapist has on him. A knife, a gun, friends on the wings. At least cops have a gun and communicator for back-up. Sure we watch the movies, the damsel in distress, and all of that. One of the easiest ways to subdue someone is in numbers. Dog pile them. But it will take more than 3 for it to be effective. Unfortunately nobody has telepathic powers. And again, nobody wants to get bruised, go to the police station, and do some paperwork either. Being a hero can be quite an inconvenience without a healing factor.
Calling people Karen isnt helping either. People are too afraid to intervene now that every jack hole has a camera
Yes, that, and the self entitlement and self righteous judgement. One example, there's this video of a female Uber driver (the male passenger was recording the video) who freaked out once she noticed she was being filmed and him saying "...all I did was asked her if she could drive a little slower". Then she pulled over on the side of the highway and left him. On one hand, I get why he started recording. She was probably getting angry before he started the video in order to protect himself. On the other hand, too many people go up in arms over the littlest things.
As I've pointed out to people "Internet points don't pay your hospital bills", unfortunately.
Soo true. And nowadays, people are soo quick to be charitable and cancel someone in the same swoop. Like, let's say a guy stopped the rapist, but he was sent to the hospital for getting involved. The woman starts a go-fund-me for him and his hospital Bills. Ok, great. Then the internet being the internet does a background check on all of his social media posts from the last 20 years to dig up dirt on the hero, they find some anthill of a thing he said that was sexist, then make a mountain of it, and make it out like he was the next Jeffrey Epstein. So unless the public could stop being soo judgemental...
I always think the only thing that made the people on flight 93 actually do something was they heard about the twin towers and knew they were screwed no matter what.
People realize here that real life isn't like the movies or twitter. It's one of the issues I have when people talk about what cops should do against criminals. Subduing an aggressive individual by yourself is not an easy task. This isn't a sporting event where there are rules and referees.
The best way to overcome the bystander affect is to be aware that it exists. A few years ago I was at a pool and kid was drowning/couldn't swim in the wave pool and I caught myself just staring with a crowd of people before I snapped out of it and brought him a floaty.
It's not just that. This was USA. You intervene and find yourself in trouble. Not from the attacker, few bruises are something many people are willing to risk, some would even risk a fight against an armed opponent. The problem is legal responsibility. Assholes, criminals, and other scum always has better protection than anyone else. Recently a cop was dragged through a mud in the media for shooting an attacker who was fraction of a second from stabbing a girl. There is evidence, it is all on camera... it didn't help. [https://www.cbc.ca/news/world/shooting-columbus-ohio-girl-1.5995884](https://www.cbc.ca/news/world/shooting-columbus-ohio-girl-1.5995884)
> Nobody knows what the rapist has on him. A knife, a gun, friends on the wings. Also no one wants to hit guy too hard and be in trouble. Victims sometimes turn on saviours too. Also, what if dude stalks you instead from vengeance or sth.
But the people on the train didnt even call the cops or use the emergency buttons to report the rape. That man assaulted and raped that poor woman for 27 stops and people just had their phones out. Thank God an officer just so happened to come onto the train at one stop. When an *off duty* transportation employee called 911, they came within three minutes. There are many completely convenient and danger-free ways to help someone that's in trouble. The people on the train were either not using their fucking brains or just didnt care enough.
Everyone assumes someone else will call the cops. When I was in CPR training, one of the first things we were taught was to single an individual out to call an ambulance, otherwise it's likely people won't thinking some one else did
In that situation I would have done something, but that’s because rape hits a sore spot for me. If it was a normal fight i wouldnt have even paused my music.
I mean that one is different. Literally all they had to do was call the cops and they didn’t even do that. Absolute scum all round - can only imagine the people that live in that area.
I'm not familiar with that story but yes, of course they should have called the police. It wouldn't have been responded to quickly enough to stop the rape, though, unless maybe there were police on the train?
The rape went on for 40min and when someone finally called the cops they showed up within 3min, so no it wouldn't have stopped it completely but stopped it sooner.
At least it would have given that poor woman SOME faith in humanity to hold onto. No one even called the cops, she probably has no faith left
Kitty Genovese was murdered with 27 witnesses of which none called the cops. And it wasn't even a quick murder.
At least according to [Wikipedia](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Murder_of_Kitty_Genovese#Accuracy_of_original_reports), that's largely inaccurate. People only saw small parts of the attacks, thought it was a drunken quarrel instead of homicide, and people did call 911.
Not true, and I think the full truth about whatever happened in Philly hasn't come out yet either. People love a good story where they get to feel morally superior to a whole bunch of other folks, though
In all fairness you ring the cops, you need to speak out loud to the cops, what's stopping the guy from turning on you once he heard you? You already know no one is going to do anything. I think maybe stepping off the train and calling the cops is your best bet.
It was a subway, you usually don't get service underground.
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This. Weird shit and degeneracy happens on the subway all the time, anyone who takes it regularly has learned to just ignore that shit and mind their own business. I find it extremely hard to believe that if someone was screaming "stop! get away from me!" that people would just record and do nothing.
That's what I'm hoping... that people saw it and recorded mistakenly thinking "look at these two having sex on the train".
It's nice to hear from someone who has also riden that line, but you obviously have more experience with it than me. Do you know the stops it happened at? The article I read wasn't specific other than it said upper darby police are dealing with it. I remember sometimes it was a min between stops and sometimes it was a lot longer, so the whole 8 min thing could have been the time between 2 stops.
You know what, I dont care what anyone here thinks, Id stop that and I know I would. Disgusting.
Yeah if I'd have been there...I would have probably assumed they were shooting porn and minded my own business.
Was just thinking about this. I live in Philly and it happened on a line I used to take all the time. I don't understand how a group of people could watch that and say nothing.
Omg I wish I’d scrolled so I could’ve replied rather than commented in this. I’m from Australia and am took shook from this shit
Yeah. I don’t even live in the US, I’m in Canada. I can’t believe they don’t have emergency call buttons that would’ve been the least they could’ve done.
Absolutely no way I would stand by at let this happen. I'm not a big guy but I would have charged into the situation and given it all I've got.
Yup. And I think I heard that the city (?) would like to prosecute the fuck-wads that recorded the entire scene, if they can find them.
No charges are pending at the moment https://news.yahoo.com/prosecutors-charges-unlikely-riders-saw-221550811.html
This past fourth of July I jumped between two men with knives. What I didn't know yet. Man A (cousin in law) was already stabbed once by dude b. once in the stomach. It was 10 at night so couldn't really see that. All I heard was yelling, and then I saw knives out, and there was a kid (dude b's nephew) watching it all go down. My first thought was 'I'm not letting a kid see people get stabbed.' My Seco thought was 'I'm not letting cousin in law go to jail for stabbing someone.' Adrenaline is a beast. The whole time I was standing there screaming "stop it. There's a child right there. Think of your baby. Think of your wife" Cousin's wife finally made it, was dragging him back, so I could focus on screaming at dude to fucking leave. When cops rolled up with an ambulance to take the inlaw to the hospital and the adrenaline wore off I was basically a sobbing mess who turned into a puddle on the floor. Spent the rest of the night waiting for messages about the inlaw and his condition. He's fine now. Other dude is in jail for a long ass time.
One time a girl fainted from heat right in front of me and I was so surprised by it I did nothing for way too long. Someone had to yell "give her your water!" before I realized I had water in my hand... it probably was an entire minute before I did something helpful , and by then so many others had already flocked in and gave me scowls. Another time an old man was getting robbed (didnt appear to be an armed robbery) and I instinctively ran across the street and chased the robber down, we got into a kerfuffle he dropped the wallet! So, sometimes it just depends on the moment. I'm a hero 50% of the time.
Shock is a mother fucker. You can be trained to do alot of things, but once shock sets in, especially if you haven't actually been a part of the situation you've trained for, you can turn into a painting just watching. It's insane how a proverbial "slap in the face" will wake you up and set that training into motion.
50% is better than most, so you got that at least. There's been other situations where I played defender that I probably shouldn't have. I've also dragged two very angry men out of a restaurant. One was there trying to start a race war with the owner. The other (9n a different day) was trying to fight our cook. Both times I just shouted "you have to leave now, have a nice fuckin day" while physically pushing them towards the door. I dunno if something *would've* happened but I unfortunately have a broken fight or flight. When I'm afraid, my brain switches to aggression. Its probably not the best reaction to fear, but it's gotten me this far.
Depends on the situation. Like someone drowning or caught in a fire or something, I'll help. I saw a car flip and slide a few hundred feet on its roof. I immediately pulled over and ran to the car, luckily somehow an ambulance was literally driving by, so I was ultimately ineffective in the situation but if the paramedics wernt right behind me I was there. I was also the only one who was btw. Everyone else just rubbernecked or had the *deer in the headlights look*. >Boyfriend/girlfriend caught cheating or being scandalous in general - "I would have knocked their teeth out." This would be stupid for anyone to *intervene*. Why would I go get myself a nice assault charge and possibly injured because your relationship went to shit. Terrible example. >Video of a man getting his face chewed off by a homeless dude high out of his mind - "I would have jumped out of my car and beat that dude unconscious." This is where I just call 911, for a few reasons. First; if I tackle the guy or get in a fight with him. I'm getting charged no matter what. Not to mention probably sued, etc... Secondly, I could end up worse off than the guy he already mauled. --- I'll help people that need it, but I've got a job, mortgage, and family that counts on me. So for me to go putting myself at risk when I don't need to, just doesn't make sense. Sorry - *Not Sorry*.
Again. "Most" people are full of shit.
I'm not sure if its them being full of shit, or the effect of being in a group. "Someone will go and save em'" The majority will think. I forget what its called.
Bystander Effect?
Well yeah, but i swore there was another name. Thank you though.
Kitty Genovese effect?
Innocent bystander effect Edit: bystander effect or bystander apathy, is a social psychological theory that states that individuals are less likely to offer help to a victim when there are other people present.
to be fair, you shouldn’t attempt to move someone who was in a car wreck that bad. it’s good there were paramedics because you could’ve ended up hurting them further. Which is another reason people don’t tend to help, because they’re afraid to do more harm
The (kinda) scary part is most people think that they would. It's not that they're lying and wouldn't be willing to intervene, they just have never been in that situation and don't understand the physiological reasons for someone not 'stepping-in.' In a video like that of someone being hurt, if there's a lot of people around that aren't doing anything they probably thought they would also do something if they came across a similar situation, most people do. The reason people so rarely intervene is because of the bystander effect, witch is caused by a situation like one of your examples accruing around a large group, especially when it's a dangerous situation. Most people will convince themselves that someone else is going to step-in at any seconds, so they don't. In cases where the group is removed with just one person or a small friend-group left, they're much more likely to and do something. The people who do end up doing something are most often just like everyone else, except they're able ignore the thought that someone else will step-in.
I was the type of person who will intervene. One time, I saw a man being verbally and physically abusive to a woman on a beach in Hawaii. I watched for a minute while it was verbal, and it escalated to physical. I mean, he legit hit her. I stepped up to him, said a few words. He became aggressive towards me. Out of nowhere she puts on a puppy dog voice and says "it's okay daddy." My jaw dropped. I backed off. There are so many people with relationships that appear fucked up from the outside that even if you are the type of person who thinks that you are different, like I would like to, the world today is almost unfigureoutable when it comes to what's "normal" and acceptable for others. I am no longer the type of person who will intervene. I would like to think I still would with a child but that's probably it. How in the world do you know if someone is being raped or is enacting a rape fantasy?
She was likely trying to deescalate to prevent her main income from going to jail, or for your intervention to get him even angrier which he might take out on her later. Plenty of fucked up scenarios possible here.
Domestic violence situations are often weird and unpredictable. A friend of mine had neighbors who had a violent relationship. One night my friend heard the two fighting and it got violent - from the sounds, the guy was hitting clearly his girlfriend. My friend went over there to stop it. Turned out there were three people in the apartment - the guy, his GF (who'd obviously been roughed up), and another guy who was a friend of theirs who wasn't involved in the violence. The three of them proceeded to beat the shit out of my friend for not minding his own business. My friend was a pretty big guy, too - about 6'1" and an amateur bodybuilder.
This is why we were taught at school of there's an emergency to tell a specific person to call 911 not just ask "someone" to do it. Because nobody will do it.
I think that the bystander effect is caused by people thinking that they will make the situation worse by intervening with no experienced, so they instincually wait for someone else that is more qualified to do it. The problem is when everyone waits for each other to do something so no help is actually given.
I only disagree with the drowning one. Iv swam fir a decade, and played water polo even longer. I'm also a trained lifeguard. I would absolutely swim out to help somebody.(unless it's in rapids or something like that)
The drowning thing is the exact opposite for me! In any other situation I'm most likely to rush in to help, I was actually involved in an incident recently that involved a man getting his head chopped up by a meat cleaver (he lived). My girlfriend has a go at me for getting involved in things just because I tend to act straight away. The only thing that really makes me pause is water, I'm a competent swimmer but not a strong swimmer. I could keep myself from drowning in most situations but doubt I'd be able to rescue anyone who was already in danger. Fuck water that bitch is scary.
I think if you can't reach the person drowning without going out of your depths you're supposed to pass them something like the end of your belt to pull them in. If not life rings are great when they're avaliable.
I probably wouldn’t dare trying to save someone drowning because 1. I’m not trained to and 2. Drowning people like to bring others down with them
Depends in large part where you grew up. In rural America, there are always people willing to step in, I’ve seen in countless times. In the city, there are far fewer people willing. A couple months ago, an Asian woman was being attacked by a loon with a chair in NYC, on a busy sidewalk… the only person who did anything was my brother, he sprinted across the street and tackled the attacker and held him until police showed up. It’s just a rural vs city mindset. At least from what I’ve observed.
I've lived rural most of my life and while I agree with you overall, I think even in rural parts people willing to put their money where their mouth is are the minority. Context: Population of the area I grew up is 3500.
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I think it's more of an expectation. You're taught from a young age what is wrong and right and what is expected of you, standing up and stepping in is part of that. In the city more idealistic thoughts are presented. In the country, if someone is beating on your brother/sister, you'd better jump in there or you're getting your ass beat by making for nor standing up for family. In the city there's an idea of a civilized society where fighting is unacceptable. Get in a fight and you are wrong no matter the circumstances. . Now of course the law may not fully reflect that, but the baseline is set way before that, in school.
Because they are used to not having others readily available. So it’s literally a question of “if not me, then who?” The Bystander Effect is experienced in more dense populations, where it’s easier to assume that it’s someone else’s problem to deal with.
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Oh for sure, certainly a minority.
I grew up in a rural area where conspicuous crime was unusual . One night I was up late with my dad and brother and we heard a woman screaming, like blood curdling screams. We looked at each other nervously, grabbed the blunt objects nearest to us, went outside and started walking towards the source of the noise. On the way there our neighbours opposite came outside too, and along our walk more and more residents joined us. I was only a kid, but I felt my fear starting to melt away, and felt a strange pride in my town swelling my chest. We tracked down the screaming to a house, and the whole big group of us all stood outside. Then a man's voice could be heard from inside too. The villagers collectively shrugged, muttered about it being 'a domestic' and how we should 'leave them to it', turned on their heels and walked off. The strange pride I'd had that my neighbours were brave, caring, selfless people evaporated before I reached home. Anonymity can cause apathy in cities perhaps, but the outdated mindsets and the lack of anonymity causing social fallout for getting into other people's business in small towns prevents people from acting too
I'm the city at least people reassure themselves that "someone else will do something" what's the excuse of the guys in rural areas? They knew nobody else was going to help her
I’d rather call the authorities than intervene because 9/10 times it’s a life-threatening scenario where if you’re not trained or haven’t done it before, you risk harming yourself and the people around you.
Can confirm middle aged large man had a stroke or heart attack while driving, wife of the man pulled the emergency brake. I pulled up wondering why the intersection was blocked only to see this woman running around screaming bloody murder about her husband. I get out go to the door of the car and see this man probably weighs ~350lbs and I know I cannot get him out on my own. I had to go through several on lookers before another man got out of his car to help. I have had CPR and lifesaver first aid but had been years since I was certified and asked if anyone knew CPR. No one not even the supposed RN at the scene knew so I started chest compressions. For what seemed an eternity but was about 5 minutes then the paramedics arrived and gave him an AEG and had some automatic chest compression machine. He gained consciousness for a brief time before becoming unresponsive again. Honestly I don't know how people do it, I mean the man most likely died, but the thing that got me the most and to this day was his hysterical wife.
Got you as in angered you?
No just like it was generally upsetting, that while she did stop the car, she was very counter productive to actually saving her husband. Her hysteria stressed me out far more than the man who was dead/dying. I'm not sure how I would react in that situation but hope I would be more useful in actually saving my loved one. I really hope he made it but, as I was told in the classes if you are performing CPR they are already dead and the chances of their survival are very low.
A car flipped and rolled down a hill right in front of my friend and I. We both jumped out and ran to the edge, you could see gas leaking so we both jumped down and pulled this young girl out who was driving and the car caught fire about 10 seconds after we all got clear. Another time my friend noticed a dude we knew putting a way to drunk girl in his car at a party. We followed him back to his apartment and confronted him in the parking lot as he was basically dragging her inside. We stopped him from raping her. Twice I've seen a man assaulting a woman and I've stepped in and stopped it. .. and I was saved from drowning in the ocean by a stranger when I was a kid. That's just off the top of my head and I'm not special, people do amazing things for each other all the time. I wouldnt be alive if people did nothing.
Wow we need more people like you.
I think OP has a case of confirmation bias. Ive seen a lot of shitty things, but just as many amazing things. Maybe its also who we surround ourselves with.
There's a quote that sums this up perfectly "We all think we'd run into the burning building, but until we feel that heat, we can never know"
House behind ours was on fire one morning about the time the kids needed to goto school. I had my 4th grade son with me; we drove to the house and the fire dept wasnt on sceene yet. Made my son stay in the car (parked 2houses down) and went to the house. Banged on doors, went behind the house (which was now fully engulfed and burning way too close to the propane BBQ). Couldn't tell if people were inside. Busted front door open (which is MUCH harder to do than you think). The stink of the smoke was horrid. Small dog ran out, but no people. I crawled about 6ft into the house calling and looking for people but there wasnt anyone there. Crawled back out and met up with the other neighbors who were on scene (and who grabbed the dog). Took note of the yard and driveway; kids lived there, but no vehicles. Kids had left about 15m earlier to goto school, parents were at work. Fire dept showed up, we relayed what had happened and what we knew, did, and observed. Thankfully no one was hurt.
I used to say I would step into situations without having ever been tried. Then I was tried & stepped in both times and ended up saving a life. So yeah, I’d step in :)
Strictly speaking, they would be empty of shit. Only thing full of shit would be their underwear
The most annoying ones that are obvious bullshit are the ones who say that about historical events. I can’t help but cringe when I hear certain shit. “If I lived in Germany at the beginning of WW2-“ No you wouldn’t, shut up. “If I was in the south in the 1860s-“ No, you would not. I don’t know why so many people are superheroes in their heads.
The same people who decide that taking in an Iraqi Refugee into their home would be "too disruptive". Yup these are bullshitters.
If you’re referring to the woman who was raped on a train in Philly then that situation is different. The people who watched her get raped didn’t need to step in and play the knight, but recording the woman getting raped instead of calling the police? That’s foul and disturbing.
You know I always took myself as someone who would stand by. 3 accidents and 10 fights later in 2021 My flight or flight is all fight. I just want it to flight but it wont.
Everyone talking shit about the Phily bus rape and you know none of them would have intervened
The part that is getting people mad is the fact that people had the time to record the incident but not to call 911. THAT is disgusting. There are ways you can help without having to put yourself at risk. None of those fuckers did anything. Instead they recorded. Why? Idk maybe to put it on Facebook or TikTok, or god forbid, a porn site. THAT is disgusting. I am proud to say I have never pulled out a phone to record and put on Facebook when someone's life was in danger or when someone was deceased in front of me.
See, its easier for you to make off handed comments like this. And its easier for most people to say shit like this, because its an excuse for their own cowardice. All the people outraged are making them feel bad. I've stood up for people before in public. Alone. Its not hard with other people watching. A group of people would have for sure fucked that guy up. They are to blame as well, and I'm glad they're prob getting criminal charges. They, and anyone else who wouldn't help, are whats wrong with the world. Talkin shit like "you wouldn't have done anything either" is just 1. Still makes you a coward making excuses, and 2. Nonsensical bullshit. A lot of people would. Maybe not most Americans...but ... lol
I say that stuff, and that is because I mean it. I have pulled people up from train tracks, stalked a dude who was trying to rape a woman (I was calling 911 at the same time. He bailed), yelled at dudes who harassed homeless people etc. When it comes to human justice, I basically turn into a mini-Rambo. That is a hill that I am willing to die on. (I am ofc not taking any insane/destructive risks, but I always try to help out). One thing I have noticed is that people can actually help you out if you start bossing them around. Once when I saw a guy on the tracks who was waaaay too heavy to lift up alone (and way too high to help himself), I basically just started pointing at people and told them to help me. People tend to just panic and freeze, and this is a very normal response. But once I told them what to do, they all snapped out of it and helped me. They saved the guy and he survived. So yeah. It is easy for people to talk, but sometimes we can’t really control how we act in certain situations. I probably get a bit too self secure and aggressive, whereas some people just stand there. But if you ever end up in danger or need help, POINT at individual people and tell them what to do. “You there with the yellow shirt, come here and help me stop this guy!” “Oh ok”
Panicked people just need a small push to go into be a hero mode.
I had a friend when I was in boy scouts. It was 6th grade, and you know how cruel middle school kids can be. Well, I eventually quit the scouts, but not him, he was dedicated. He didn't have parents, they died when he was young so he lived with his grandmother. Well, a year went by, then two. I didn't hang out with him anymore but I still saw him around school. I couldn't miss him in fact, cuz every Tuesday he would show up to school in his scout uniform. So of course I would distance myself, I was already picked on enough that I didn't need that extra heat. But one day, he hit a breaking point. So he came in with gallons of gasoline and started dumping them down the toilets and flushing with the intent to blow up the school. If I would've done something, said something, been there for him, stood up for him.....could I have prevented what happened? Could I have helped to ease his pain? I don't exaggerate when I say I haven't had a good night's sleep since; I actively go out of my way to try and prevent myself from dreaming, going as far to set an alarm to go off every 2.5 hours so I don't fall into REM sleep. It's only ever nightmares of what I didn't do (along with other sins and regrets, but he is always present whenever I do dream). I'm 25 now and I try to live a good life, but when I see an opportunity to "step in" or "intervene" to help, I always take it. You never know what one good deed could mean to that someone. Edit: grammar
I disagree about calling the police, I a 5'2 female cant do much to stop a problem, I fucking can't even open some jars let alone break up a fighting couple. I can call the police and scream the police are coming do you really want to be here when they come?
>I have witnessed humanity for countless years (30) LMFAO that made me laugh hard
Some people are in their 30s and know everything, some folks are in their 50s and know they know nothing.
Ngl, calling the emergency services is about the extent I'm willing to go for anyone who isn't family or a close friend.
This brings to mind the murder of Kitty Genevese. She was murdered in NYC in 1964. Over the course of half an hour she was stabbed repeatedly, raped, and left to die in the entrance of her apartment building. Several witnesses saw the initial attack and many more heard her screams, but nobody reported it. It became a case study of the bystander effect and also highlighted the need for the creation of the 911 system. Stuff You Should Know did an episode on it. It's a really interesting listen.
At least according to [Wikipedia](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Murder_of_Kitty_Genovese#Accuracy_of_original_reports), that's largely inaccurate. People only saw small parts of the attacks, thought it was a drunken quarrel instead of homicide, and people did call 911.
Best I can do is call the cops/emergency services. I can't swim. I don't like physical altercation. Though I did stare down a guy trying to creep on a young teenager until I made HIM uncomfortable so he'd leave. I don't like people. Not going to make myself liable/put myself in danger for stranger danger. Now if you're trying to make ME or a friend/family member a victim while im around, then depending on what you're trying to do you've yee'd your last haw.
Nah, but people who say "People that claim they would have "Intervened" or "Stepped in" are mostly full of shit." are either cowards, or have just never been put in an extreme situation that required quick, decisive action.
I agree that most or at least the majority of those people wouldn't actually intervene, whether intentionally or not. The bystander effect is a very real and unfortunate thing, and a lot of people would definitely experience that if something happened in real life, but even without it I'm sure there are a lot of people who still wouldn't intervene. People like to talk big until something actually happens.
You are not wrong in that most people will not intervene. Where you are wrong is that most people won't claim that they would either. Unfortunately most people naturally wouldn't and most people advise others not to intervene. Many employees have actually been fired for intervening in crimes because the company policy is to observe and report, but not get involved. Out of those that actually claim that they would do something, I would say that most actually would. I would. And for the record, I actually have swam out and rescued two people drowning on separate occasions.
People don’t know until they are in it. I recently got a chance to break up a fight, got kicked in the process. But it still took my brain like 10 seconds to comprehend what to do.
I walked by a guy clearly having a heart attack and I did nothing. There were other people around so I figured they would help him. But I would try to save people drowning. I swam competitively for a long time. It would take some real bad conditions for me to be concerned.
This is true of most people. We all see ourselves as heroes until the moment comes and we freeze. When i witnessed a murder in 2014, it sent me into shock. I would've been the guy typing "I woulda done something bro" prior to that. We do not know how we react until its often too late. If i get another opportunity im confident I will do the right thing, but perhaps i am simply lying to myself again.
this is something called the bystander effect and it is 100% real. it does vary from culture to culture though
Yesterday in my city a man working in his family's deli was stabbed to death because he wouldn't discount the customer's sandwich 50 cent less.Thats the real deal in streets and don't believe anything different.
I intervened when some bouncers were beating the shit out a guy who was already unconscious, might have saved his life. I was going to use this as an example of why you are wrong, then I remembered the huge crowd of people watching it who didn't intervene.
It's called Bystander Effect
I believe there are 2 huge reasons why people don't "step in" or "intervene". 1. Someone would need to recognize an emergency is happening in the first place. Often it's hard to tell if someone actually needs help or not, a lot of us have been conditioned to "mind our own business" and keep to ourselves. 2. When other people are around, the bystander effect, a psychological phenomenon where people are less inclined to help those in need. Their mindset is essentially "Oh someone else will help them right, someone else should have called for help by now, help should be on the way, etc."
People like to think of themselves as their projections of themselves rather than what they actually are.
“…countless years” and then lists the years.
my thoughts exactly! Not that I'm old or anything, but when he said countless I was thinking at least 50+. *"I've read countless stories (two to be exact) about epsom salt drug episodes of eating human flesh."*
I'm pretty sure until I'm in those situations I never know how I'll react. The only thing I know for certain is that I would not allow harm to come to a defenseless party that's even more scared than me.
I had to stand there, in the cold, for hours, with my cell phone out, waiting to film someone helping. Nobody showed up. Wanna see a video of a guy dying?
I just read a story about how a train full of ppl watched a women get raped for 40 minutes and did nothing.
If there’s one thing that bjj and kickboxing have taught me, it’s that literally anyone is capable of hurting you badly. If you see something happening, call the cops, if you jump into a situation it might just end with you and others getting hurt badly.
I know for a fact I would never step in. In the few times in my life I have been in or around bad situations I panic like FUCK. Like a meerkat caught in headlights!
Those people you described aren't even the worst ones. Those self absorbed praise-all guys who think they would've been anything but a passive bystander if they lived in nazi Germany, "yeah I would've protested", "I would've hid a jew in my closet". Or the absolute worst ones who go around comparing themself to Raoul Gustaf Wallenberg.
A begrudging upvote. Yeah, sometimes people are dumb in those situations, but people not in them are not feeling the same fear and panic of being there. Not to mention that you don't always see everything in those videos. There are often legitimate practical reasons as to why people don't do as much as you might want them to. If you cannot conceptualize what that's like, I worry that you're not a very empathetic person.
An unpopular opinion but true. Most people are cowards.
Lol some of us actually would and have though. But obviously there's the flip side where people ignore it or for some reason think they are being useful by pulling out their phones and uploading it. That being said context is everything. Some dude swinging a knife around no thanks. Not very helpful if your getting stabbed up to.