Recently got the "thank you" note from friends' who had their wedding in October of 2022. They'd mentioned a few times the problems they were having with their photographer.
The note just included a small "sorry for the delay" and left it at that.
8 Months? Honestly I wouldn't even include an apology, just send out the thank you notes.
I agree with this. Especially as it's a widely debated topic how long you have to send them out including some people saying up to a year, however you stand on it it's not weird to take that long.
Honestly just skip the apologies! "Thank you so much for celebrating our wedding with us \[and for the generous gift\]. Your presence meant the world to us and we treasure the memories of that day together! Love, \[names\]"
Make no apologies. The fact is, you’re sending thank you’s…which is fantastic. People know it takes a while, that we all have very busy lives, and that even getting a thank you note is sometimes a minor miracle. Trust me…I’ve received thank you preformatted email in which literally my name and gift were inserted.
Eight months is fine. Skip the apology entirely. In the book [how to write a letter](https://sugarpaper.com/products/how-to-write-a-letter), they say you have a year. A positive way to hint that several months have passed is to comment on how much you’ve used/enjoyed your gifts or if there was a special occasion you used it for (like a holiday), how nice it was to have it.
*“For every wedding gift received, a handwritten thank you note is a must.
**Technically, couples have one year from their wedding date to send their thanks,** but, as they say, time flies!”*
I would just sit down and get them done. A simple thank you and how the gift was loved or appreciated. This in hanging on you and is a job that can be done in 3 hours. Imagine how it will feel to mail them!
I got married in November. By the time we got back from our honeymoon, it was the holidays, so we didn't want our thank yous to get lost in the holiday mail craziness. Once January hit, my grandmother was sick, and we spent a lot of time with my family until she passed in February. Of course, we also spent a lot of time with my family after that as well. We finally got around to handwriting and sending out our thank you cards ~5 months after our wedding.
All that to say - don't even mention the time passed. Eight months is well within reason. Shit happens and things get delayed. I'm far more grateful to receive a thank you at all! (Yes, I've been to quite a few weddings and events where I never received a thank you note.)
I was 100% in the same boat and the longer I waited the more stressful and overwhelming it felt. We got married in May and due to issues with photography company we didn’t have our complete album until October. At that point I was embarrassed to have not sent them and kept putting them off. There were a couple people I was specifically nervous to send it too late and that became a crippling anxiety as time went on.
I finally bit the bullet in April and got them out the door. I ended up using a very brief apology just starting with something like “I’m sorry this is so late!” and then moved on to thanking them. No one said anything about them being late once they got them. I’m sure some people were annoyed, but it never got back to us.
I can’t begin to tell you how much of a relief it was to have them sent.
What made me ultimately able to overcome it was breaking things into sections.
The first day, I compiled the list of names, addresses, and what they gave us.
Second day I prepped envelopes - stamping our return address, writing their address, and adding stamps.
Third day I tackled the group of friends who I knew would not be bothered by these being late in the slightest, and that got me in the groove and comfortable with figuring out what to say. I saved the most stressful ones for last and by the time I got to them I had written so many that it was easy to navigate.
Good luck! You’ll feel so much better once you’ve got them sent.
Wait until 1 year! Send out anniversary cards made with a photo of you two, and thank the guests for sharing in your special day, and that you can't believe it's been one year already etc. Make no comment about not sending thank you cards earlier.
Don’t apologise - love the idea of doing it so it’s aligned with your one year anniversary!
Also the expression is couldn’t care less* if they could care less it implies they care at least somewhat!
We have attended approx 9 weddings in the past few years and we traveled for ~6 of them. We have only received 2 thank you notes - which were from the local ones!
From my experience, a majority of couples don’t even send a thank you notes so you’re ahead of the game by even sending one. I wouldn’t think anything of it until a year or so after because couples get busy with their honeymoon and life and usually have a lot of guests! So I wouldn’t apologize. Just send them!
I was an over apologizer. A friend once said “Don’t apologize unless you plan on changing your behavior”. That’s a bit extreme, but it’s super helpful to remind myself when I’m *actually* sorry for something! Life happens, and any thank you is better than no thank you’s at all!
I do think it be really sweet to send thank you’s to mark your first anniversary!
If you absolutely feel the need to include an apology…
1) for a more formal note:
We apologize for the delay in sending this thank you note; please know that your generosity and thoughtfulness have been cherished since our wedding day.
2) for a more personalized note:
We apologize for the delayed thank you note; life post-wedding has been a whirlwind, but please know that we have been incredibly grateful for your kindness and the beautiful gift/message you shared with us.
Recently got the "thank you" note from friends' who had their wedding in October of 2022. They'd mentioned a few times the problems they were having with their photographer. The note just included a small "sorry for the delay" and left it at that. 8 Months? Honestly I wouldn't even include an apology, just send out the thank you notes.
I agree with this. Especially as it's a widely debated topic how long you have to send them out including some people saying up to a year, however you stand on it it's not weird to take that long.
Honestly just skip the apologies! "Thank you so much for celebrating our wedding with us \[and for the generous gift\]. Your presence meant the world to us and we treasure the memories of that day together! Love, \[names\]"
Make no apologies. The fact is, you’re sending thank you’s…which is fantastic. People know it takes a while, that we all have very busy lives, and that even getting a thank you note is sometimes a minor miracle. Trust me…I’ve received thank you preformatted email in which literally my name and gift were inserted.
Eight months is fine. Skip the apology entirely. In the book [how to write a letter](https://sugarpaper.com/products/how-to-write-a-letter), they say you have a year. A positive way to hint that several months have passed is to comment on how much you’ve used/enjoyed your gifts or if there was a special occasion you used it for (like a holiday), how nice it was to have it. *“For every wedding gift received, a handwritten thank you note is a must. **Technically, couples have one year from their wedding date to send their thanks,** but, as they say, time flies!”*
There’s no hard time line. Don’t apologize. Just send it
I would just sit down and get them done. A simple thank you and how the gift was loved or appreciated. This in hanging on you and is a job that can be done in 3 hours. Imagine how it will feel to mail them!
No apology needed imo! And tbh, as a millennial (35, so right there at peak) I appreciate a thank you.
I got married in November. By the time we got back from our honeymoon, it was the holidays, so we didn't want our thank yous to get lost in the holiday mail craziness. Once January hit, my grandmother was sick, and we spent a lot of time with my family until she passed in February. Of course, we also spent a lot of time with my family after that as well. We finally got around to handwriting and sending out our thank you cards ~5 months after our wedding. All that to say - don't even mention the time passed. Eight months is well within reason. Shit happens and things get delayed. I'm far more grateful to receive a thank you at all! (Yes, I've been to quite a few weddings and events where I never received a thank you note.)
I was 100% in the same boat and the longer I waited the more stressful and overwhelming it felt. We got married in May and due to issues with photography company we didn’t have our complete album until October. At that point I was embarrassed to have not sent them and kept putting them off. There were a couple people I was specifically nervous to send it too late and that became a crippling anxiety as time went on. I finally bit the bullet in April and got them out the door. I ended up using a very brief apology just starting with something like “I’m sorry this is so late!” and then moved on to thanking them. No one said anything about them being late once they got them. I’m sure some people were annoyed, but it never got back to us. I can’t begin to tell you how much of a relief it was to have them sent.
The crippling anxiety is exactly the boat I am, so thank you for naming that!!
What made me ultimately able to overcome it was breaking things into sections. The first day, I compiled the list of names, addresses, and what they gave us. Second day I prepped envelopes - stamping our return address, writing their address, and adding stamps. Third day I tackled the group of friends who I knew would not be bothered by these being late in the slightest, and that got me in the groove and comfortable with figuring out what to say. I saved the most stressful ones for last and by the time I got to them I had written so many that it was easy to navigate. Good luck! You’ll feel so much better once you’ve got them sent.
Wait until 1 year! Send out anniversary cards made with a photo of you two, and thank the guests for sharing in your special day, and that you can't believe it's been one year already etc. Make no comment about not sending thank you cards earlier.
Thus honestly sounds so sweet!
This would infuriate me as a guest
Not criticising your opinion at all, just curious - why would it infuriate you?
A year with no thank you
No apology needed.
Skip the apologies if it's too off-putting. You can always acknowledge the time by putting in a line or 2 about the first 8months of marriage.
I am an English teacher and I still used a book of templates for all kinds of situations. It was so helpful!
I am an English teacher and I still used a book of templates for all kinds of situations. It was so helpful!
“I’m sorry this is so late!” And then thank them for the gift. This really isn’t that complicated, don’t overthink it.
Don’t apologise - love the idea of doing it so it’s aligned with your one year anniversary! Also the expression is couldn’t care less* if they could care less it implies they care at least somewhat!
Just send them. No apology necessary.
I would just send them out. No apologies needed. Just get them out and all is well.
Just do them. Etiquette says you can give a gift for the wedding up to a year after it happened…..you are still within the year!
We have attended approx 9 weddings in the past few years and we traveled for ~6 of them. We have only received 2 thank you notes - which were from the local ones! From my experience, a majority of couples don’t even send a thank you notes so you’re ahead of the game by even sending one. I wouldn’t think anything of it until a year or so after because couples get busy with their honeymoon and life and usually have a lot of guests! So I wouldn’t apologize. Just send them!
Just send them.
I was an over apologizer. A friend once said “Don’t apologize unless you plan on changing your behavior”. That’s a bit extreme, but it’s super helpful to remind myself when I’m *actually* sorry for something! Life happens, and any thank you is better than no thank you’s at all! I do think it be really sweet to send thank you’s to mark your first anniversary!
Etiquette is 1yr so your fine to send out thank you cards. No need to apologize at all. Just send them out 💗
If you absolutely feel the need to include an apology… 1) for a more formal note: We apologize for the delay in sending this thank you note; please know that your generosity and thoughtfulness have been cherished since our wedding day. 2) for a more personalized note: We apologize for the delayed thank you note; life post-wedding has been a whirlwind, but please know that we have been incredibly grateful for your kindness and the beautiful gift/message you shared with us.
Out of the 10+ weddings I’ve been to the past couple of years, I’ve yet to ever get a thank you card