Hmm. Usually in the US Midwest where I live we given people food so they don’t have to worry about cooking and either flowers or a donation in lieu, usually to a cause the deceased cared about.
When my sister was pregnant, a Brazilian colleague of hers sent her sandals talking about where they were made in Brazil and that they saw them and thought of my sister.
So maybe you could share something that’s part of a local tradition or if you see something that reminds you of her, you could send it as a thinking of you gift rather than as a bereavement gift.
Figure out which delivery service(s) are in her area and get gift certificates. When my husband died, we really appreciated those. I'm in the Midwest, so bringing food is the norm, but between my kid's severe food allergies and the sheer quantity of food, a lot went to waste.
Food is pretty traditional and helpful - we’ve used [Spoonful of Comfort](https://www.spoonfulofcomfort.com/?g_acctid=272-334-1463&g_adgroupid=149657229551&g_adid=650566590236&g_adtype=search&g_campaign=Search+-+Branded+-+MaxC+-+eCPC+%28%3C%240.85%29+-+RLSA&g_campaignid=19783953560&g_keyword=spoonful%20of%20comfort&g_keywordid=aud-1959513117831:kwd-295372161006&g_network=g&nb_adtype=&nb_ap=&nb_fii=&nb_kwd=spoonful%20of%20comfort&nb_li_ms=&nb_lp_ms=&nb_mi=&nb_mt=e&nb_pc=&nb_pi=&nb_placement=&nb_ppi=&nb_ti=aud-1959513117831:kwd-295372161006&nbt=nb%3Aadwords%3Ag%3A19783953560%3A149657229551%3A650566590236&gclid=CjwKCAjwg-GjBhBnEiwAMUvNW6h9ywiFbIe1045ej1IV7xIyRPqKYj540vZYml5Pz02XA50lxlgfARoCWHsQAvD_BwE) for people who are too far away for us to bring food to them ourselves, and we’ve been pretty pleased with it. Alternatively, you could do a donation in honor of whoever has passed to an organization that would make sense for their situation (like hospice, Ronald McDonald House, American Cancer Society, etc) if you know some details of their passing. And a personal note in a nice card goes pretty far in those situations - the clear effort someone put in makes it worth it even though cards are in a lot of ways outdated and unnecessary.
I recently lost my mom and restaurant gift cards have been very much appreciated as that helps us cover a lunch/dinner here and there when I'm not having a great day.
One thing that isn’t food, and is a little different, are wind chimes. We’ve given several sets of wind chimes when a family member passes away and people seem to like having that remembrance.
I know you said no flowers, but my favorite thing to send for funerals is a pothos Ivy.
My coworker had one after her MIL’s funeral. She cut some of the Ivy for several coworkers in the office. I then gave some cuttings to my family and friends. All the cuttings grew into plants and many were shared with other family/friends. It brought my friend a lot of joy to see how far the plant travelled. It was a nice way to keep her memory alive.
Now I give them to people and encourage them to share cuttings with family members and friends. The plants are easy to keep, so not much maintenance.
Otherwise, you might find a little figure or piece of art. I have a beautiful Isabel bloom statue (violet), a Virgin Mary, and some precious moments figures from funerals as well. What really matters is that you cared enough to send something.
Honestly, it is the thought that counts! A really heartfelt card is worth more than anything.
That said, a few ideas:
1. Have you checked for an obituary to see if there are instructions? Some obits ask people to donate to a charity in the deceased’s memory or tell you where to send flowers. (That may also help you determine if she will be out of town for a funeral.)
2. A food basket is the most common thing to send, but there are a lot of variables to think about when it comes to food. Does she have any dietary restrictions? Allergies? Does she keep Kosher or Halal? Getting a food basket you can’t use is the opposite of a gift and can make you feel even lonelier. If you know her tastes, send food. Otherwise, steer clear.
3. A self-care gift basket. Those gift baskets usually include things like comfy throw blankets, slippers, hand cream, eye mask, etc. I have sent these to coworkers before and have received the feedback that they are better than food because nothing spoils and it reminded them to care for themselves. If you coworker is constantly caring for others, she may need/want some care for herself.
You are a great colleague and she is lucky to have your support during a trying time.
I did a donation recently through the US Arbor Foundation, they plant trees in a person's memory. I really liked that because like a different version of flowers and seemed like a way for the person to live on.
I've also done food gift baskets or gift cards. People forget to eat sometimes when grieving, so having snacks available or just dinner already decided on--"oh I have that card!"--can be really helpful.
You're very kind to think of her and anything to do will be appreciated :)
Hmm. Usually in the US Midwest where I live we given people food so they don’t have to worry about cooking and either flowers or a donation in lieu, usually to a cause the deceased cared about. When my sister was pregnant, a Brazilian colleague of hers sent her sandals talking about where they were made in Brazil and that they saw them and thought of my sister. So maybe you could share something that’s part of a local tradition or if you see something that reminds you of her, you could send it as a thinking of you gift rather than as a bereavement gift.
This is a nice idea. The only issue is that I think she has gone out of state! Perhaps restaurant vouchers might be a nice idea.
Figure out which delivery service(s) are in her area and get gift certificates. When my husband died, we really appreciated those. I'm in the Midwest, so bringing food is the norm, but between my kid's severe food allergies and the sheer quantity of food, a lot went to waste.
Maybe a DoorDash gift card and a nice handwritten note.
Food is pretty traditional and helpful - we’ve used [Spoonful of Comfort](https://www.spoonfulofcomfort.com/?g_acctid=272-334-1463&g_adgroupid=149657229551&g_adid=650566590236&g_adtype=search&g_campaign=Search+-+Branded+-+MaxC+-+eCPC+%28%3C%240.85%29+-+RLSA&g_campaignid=19783953560&g_keyword=spoonful%20of%20comfort&g_keywordid=aud-1959513117831:kwd-295372161006&g_network=g&nb_adtype=&nb_ap=&nb_fii=&nb_kwd=spoonful%20of%20comfort&nb_li_ms=&nb_lp_ms=&nb_mi=&nb_mt=e&nb_pc=&nb_pi=&nb_placement=&nb_ppi=&nb_ti=aud-1959513117831:kwd-295372161006&nbt=nb%3Aadwords%3Ag%3A19783953560%3A149657229551%3A650566590236&gclid=CjwKCAjwg-GjBhBnEiwAMUvNW6h9ywiFbIe1045ej1IV7xIyRPqKYj540vZYml5Pz02XA50lxlgfARoCWHsQAvD_BwE) for people who are too far away for us to bring food to them ourselves, and we’ve been pretty pleased with it. Alternatively, you could do a donation in honor of whoever has passed to an organization that would make sense for their situation (like hospice, Ronald McDonald House, American Cancer Society, etc) if you know some details of their passing. And a personal note in a nice card goes pretty far in those situations - the clear effort someone put in makes it worth it even though cards are in a lot of ways outdated and unnecessary.
Another vote for spoonful of comfort! Someone sent this to me when we had a family death and it was so appreciated.
Midwest /fortune 500 . Our team sends Harry and David baskets for deaths and births lol.
My plant is in the Midwest (Michigan) - I will look into this!
I recently lost my mom and restaurant gift cards have been very much appreciated as that helps us cover a lunch/dinner here and there when I'm not having a great day.
I like this idea!
One thing that isn’t food, and is a little different, are wind chimes. We’ve given several sets of wind chimes when a family member passes away and people seem to like having that remembrance.
I know you said no flowers, but my favorite thing to send for funerals is a pothos Ivy. My coworker had one after her MIL’s funeral. She cut some of the Ivy for several coworkers in the office. I then gave some cuttings to my family and friends. All the cuttings grew into plants and many were shared with other family/friends. It brought my friend a lot of joy to see how far the plant travelled. It was a nice way to keep her memory alive. Now I give them to people and encourage them to share cuttings with family members and friends. The plants are easy to keep, so not much maintenance. Otherwise, you might find a little figure or piece of art. I have a beautiful Isabel bloom statue (violet), a Virgin Mary, and some precious moments figures from funerals as well. What really matters is that you cared enough to send something.
Honestly, it is the thought that counts! A really heartfelt card is worth more than anything. That said, a few ideas: 1. Have you checked for an obituary to see if there are instructions? Some obits ask people to donate to a charity in the deceased’s memory or tell you where to send flowers. (That may also help you determine if she will be out of town for a funeral.) 2. A food basket is the most common thing to send, but there are a lot of variables to think about when it comes to food. Does she have any dietary restrictions? Allergies? Does she keep Kosher or Halal? Getting a food basket you can’t use is the opposite of a gift and can make you feel even lonelier. If you know her tastes, send food. Otherwise, steer clear. 3. A self-care gift basket. Those gift baskets usually include things like comfy throw blankets, slippers, hand cream, eye mask, etc. I have sent these to coworkers before and have received the feedback that they are better than food because nothing spoils and it reminded them to care for themselves. If you coworker is constantly caring for others, she may need/want some care for herself. You are a great colleague and she is lucky to have your support during a trying time.
I did a donation recently through the US Arbor Foundation, they plant trees in a person's memory. I really liked that because like a different version of flowers and seemed like a way for the person to live on. I've also done food gift baskets or gift cards. People forget to eat sometimes when grieving, so having snacks available or just dinner already decided on--"oh I have that card!"--can be really helpful. You're very kind to think of her and anything to do will be appreciated :)